Beautiful
by HarrysAngel

Rating: G
Ship: Harry & Hermione
Canon: Books 1 - 6
Genre: Angst, Romance
Status: Complete
Length: 5,194 words in 4 chapters
Published: 21 Apr 2006
Last updated: 25 Apr 2006

He knew he couldn't have her, yet he still looked for her every time they were in the same room. Wishing he could be
with her. Alright I KNOW this STARTS R/Hr but I PROMISE it's NOT going to end that way. It will end H/Hr. Promise.

From the Unofficial Portkey Archive: https://portkey-archive.org/story/5970/

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1. untitled

AN: I'm not real sure about this one but I figured the only way to gauge what people think is to post it. So here it is.
I wrote this in about an hour last night. It's loosely and I mean loosely based on the song 'You're Beautiful' by James
Blunt. Please be honest, but don't flame. Tell me what you like and what you don't like. If something needs to be
changed. Okay? Thanks!

~*~*~*~*~

He watched her as she glided across the room, arms draped casually across her partner's shoulders as they moved to the
slow rhythm of the music. Lost in each other's presence, they didn't notice the pair of emerald green eyes watching
their every move.

Or rather, watching her every move. Every time he had let his eyes fall on her partner, his fists had clenched painful.
And his blood had started to boil. Yet he knew he couldn't do anything about it.

He knew he couldn't have her.

She was with him now. And there was nothing he could do about it. This only added to his frustration.

He continued to follow their progress across the floor until a distraction came in the form of his own partner. A fiery
red head whose company he had been enjoying since his sixth year of school.

Dragging his eyes away from the dancing couple, he let his gaze fall on the woman standing next to him.

With her after mentioned fiery red hair, slim figure that had curves in all the right places, and deep set blue eyes,
Ginny Weasley was simply stunning.

She turned heads everywhere she went, and seemed to walk on air. Yet for all this, she was not happy. Yes, she was
dating the wizarding world's most arguably handsome wizard, Harry Potter, but it was not all golden snitches and roses.

Lately it seemed she had had to fight for his attention and affections. Constantly drawing his attention away from her.
Ginny knew that his eyes constantly sought her out while they were in the same room together.

Always searching for that telltale curly brown hair. Or straining to hear that unique laugh of hers. Always searching
for a sign of her, his eyes always roaming, never still.

And Ginny would fight it, tooth and nail. Trying to get him to look at her. She would wear the lowest cut dresses to
events such as this one, the Ministry's Annual Christmas Ball.

She would dance with other men, trying to make him jealous. Once she even tried to dance with Draco Malfoy, to see if it
would get a reaction out of him.

But it seemed all in vain. He seemed to have eyes only for her.

And tonight was no exception. Ginny followed his gaze and was not surprised to find it resting on the twirling figure of
the youngest of her older brothers and Harry's other best friend, Ron Weasley. And wrapped in his arms, was one,
Hermione Granger.

The object of Harry's heart and intense gaze. The girl that he had fallen in love with. And whom, he knew, he could
never have.

Yet he could not stop thinking about her, or seeking her out when they were in the same room. Always. It was slowly
driving him mad. Especially when he was supposed to be best friends with her boyfriend.

The slowing and final stopping of the music is what drew Harry from his thoughts, but did not falter his gaze from the
pair he had been staring at all night.

It was as he watched that Ron reached into the pocket of his dress robes and withdrew a small, black velvet box.

The blood pounded in Harry's ears. He knew what was coming. And as much as he wanted to stop it, he knew he could not.
He would never do that to her. He would never sacrifice her happiness for his own selfishness.

The gathered guests, catching on that something was happening, had stopped to watch the pair in the middle of the dance
floor. Ron on one knee, looking up at Hermione with love shining in his eyes.

Before Ron could say a word, Harry turned and left the room. He could not bear to watch. Knowing now for certain, that
he could never be with her. Ever.

It was too much. He had to get out of there.

As he stepped out into the cold night, leaving the party behind him, Harry whispered softly into the velvety night
before disapparating.

“I love you, Hermione. I hope you have a happy life.”

Fin

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2. untitled

Authors Note: Wow I did not think this was going to get this much response that fast. *Wipes forehead* Don't worry I'm
working on writing the rest! And it will end H/Hr. I promise!

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3. untitled

AN: I feel as though I have a lot to live up to all the sudden. After the overwhelming response to the first half of
this story, I really hope I've met your expectations. This originally was going to be it but there is a third part
coming. I would also like to say that it was always my intention to write more to this story. My original thought being
to post the sequel (now sequels) as a separate story but it seems that it's best if they all go together. I never
intended to leave it as it was. I'm sorry if that misled some people, but that's the truth. Anyway, please let me know
what you think. Like it? Hate it? But please, don't flame. Thanks!

~*~*~*~*~

She could feel his eyes on her. Scorching her skin with the fiery intensity of his stare. She always knew when his eyes
were on her. Something inside her seemed to stir when they were, making her soul want to sing. She knew when they were
in a room together he always searched for her.

She knew because she did the same. Her eyes always seeking him out. Looking for that impossibly messy black hair.

Her fingers itching to run through it. But she could not. She was with Ron. Ron whom she tried to love as he loved her
but could not.

Not when her heart ached to be in the arms of his best friend.

Shaking herself, she tried to distract herself by looking around the elegant ballroom they were in for the Ministry's
Annual Christmas Ball.

She tried to take in the shimmering fairy lights hanging everywhere and the massive Christmas tree placed in the corner
near the door. Ornaments and different colored bobbles hung suspended in the air near the ceiling, twinkling in the
torch light.

But, as always, her eyes soon betrayed her and she found herself once more resting her gaze on a head of messy black
hair.

A quiet sigh escaped her lips as Ron revolved them around the dance floor, and Hermione knew Harry's eyes were following
her as she twirled.

Just as she was working up the courage to ask Ron to go over to talk to Harry, Ginny appeared at Harry's side.

Hermione felt her blood run cold. How could she have forgotten? Of course, he was here with her. They were, after all,
dating. Why shouldn't they be?

Why shouldn't he be with Ginny? She was beautiful. Everyone knew that. She always turned heads wherever she went, and
was envied (and in some cases hated) for having snagged the wizarding world's most eligible bachelor.

Hermione tried to hide her disappointment that another night would be spent without seeing Harry when suddenly
everything went quiet.

When she looked around, she found all the eyes of the crowd on her.

“Ron what's-“ But her voice died in her throat.

Ron had pulled away to kneel in front of her, looking up at her with such love in his eyes, it broke her heart.

A small velvet box resting in the palm of his hand was open to reveal a beautiful white gold ring with rubies set into
the band, a single diamond sitting in the middle.

Tears sprang to Hermione's eyes, knowing that she could not do this any longer. She could not pretend to love Ron the
way he wanted her to. She could not lead him on any longer.

So before he could get his question out, she whispered, “Ron, I'm so sorry. But I can't. I'm sorry. Please don't hate
me, but I just can't. I do love you, but not like you love me. I don't want to lead you on. Please, I-I never meant to
hurt you. I'm sorry.”

Hermione felt as though she was slowly ripping Ron's heart out and squeezing it to add to his pain. It made her feel
sick. But she knew she had done the right thing.

Deciding to chance a look at Ron, Hermione almost immediately wished she hadn't.

He features were set in a look that said he may have swallowed something bitter. And when she looked into his normally
smiling blue eyes, she saw smoldering anger.

Taking a step backwards, Hermione heard the murmurs running through the collected crowd. People whispering quietly to
their neighbor.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternal silence, Ron spoke, his voice crisp and sharp.

“It's him isn't it?” he asked quietly.

Hermione had been prepared for many things, but not for this. How did he know? Was I that obvious?

Deciding to play dumb to play for time, she said, “What are you talking about?”

Ron laughed, though it sounded hollow and not full of his usual mirth and warmth.

“Don't play dumb Hermione. It doesn't suit you.”

“Ron I-“

“Save your excuses Hermione. I don't want to hear them. Please, just go. Go see your lover. I know that's what you
want,” he spat.

Shock ripped through Hermione at the venom in Ron's voice and for a minute, she stood frozen to her spot. Then, blinking
back her building tears furiously, she turned and left the dance floor.

As each step carried her closer to the exit, Hermione searched the room desperately for Harry. He wasn't there.

Swallowing hard, she looked around once more to make sure and found herself looking at Ginny's tear streaked face.

“You're going after him aren't you?” she asked quietly.

“I am,” Hermione, said afraid this would cause another explosion of the famous Weasley temper.

However, it did not. Instead, Ginny said quietly, “I always knew it wouldn't last. I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
After all, he's always watching you when you're in a room together.”

Hermione nodded, saying, “I know, I can always feel when his eyes are on me.”

A choked sob that could have been a laugh escaped Ginny's throat. “You two always know,” she said. “Go to him Hermione.
And tell him you love him. That way, at least someone will be happy.”

With that, Ginny turned and walked towards the table where the punch was, turning back only once to look over her
shoulder; giving her one last sad look.

Hermione tried to give her a reassuring smile but it seemed to come out as more of a grimace. Sighing, she turned and
walked through the door behind her and out into the cold December night.

As Hermione stood in the cold, trying to get her bearings and her emotions together, her thoughts turned to Harry.
Wondering where he could have gone.

Closing her eyes, Hermione willed herself to clear her mind and think clearly. After a minutes silent contemplation she
opened her eyes and smiled. “I'm coming Harry,” she whispered and with a small `pop' she was gone.

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4. untitled

AN: Okay this is a little longer than the first two because there's so much that happens. Hopefully you will all like
it. Please let me know if you hate it, love it, whatever. It has been fun to write this. And I've enjoyed reading all
the reviews, even though I haven't responded to them all, mostly because of the sheer volume at first. So a big thanks
to everyone who has reviewed. *Big Smile*

~*~*~*~*~*~

Godric's Hollow was quiet when Harry appeared in the middle of the snowy lawn of the house that had been his home for
the first year of his life. The snow was falling gently, each flake floating almost lazily towards the ground,
collecting on the surrounding sidewalks and lawns, coating them in a glistening white blanket.

Looking around him, Harry saw that many of the houses were decorated for Christmas with brightly colored lights and
assorted lighted figures such as Father Christmas.

A feeling of sorrow swept through him at the sight. Knowing that in many of these houses, families were celebrating the
holiday. Something he had never experienced except that one Christmas with Sirius and the one spent at the Burrow in
sixth year.

But Harry always felt like he was intruding on both those occasions, the fact that he didn't truly have a family of his
own driven home painfully.

And then when he realized that he was in love with Hermione, hope began to glimmer inside him. Hope that maybe, when the
war was over, he could have a family with her.

Those hopes were forever dashed the day that Dumbledore died and the search for Voldemort's Horcruxes had begun. It was
during that search that Ron and Hermione had finally gotten together. Forever dashing Harry's hopes of having a family.
Because he knew that, he could never love Ginny that way, not when his heart bled for Hermione.

Of course, he had considered Ron's feelings once he realized his own. However, Harry had harbored the hope that Ron's
feelings would fade or that Hermione would not return them.

“Yeah and that bloody well backfired in my face,” he muttered bitterly as he set off in the direction of the cemetery.

By the time Harry made it to the cemetery where his parents were buried, the snow had started to come down a harder, the
wind swirling it about as it fell. And by the time he reached the gates, his black hair was flecked with snow, making it
look like he had spots of grey in it.

Stepping slowly through the gates, taking care not to trample on the flowers laid on a grave just inside them, he made
his way up the small lane.

Keeping his head down, Harry tried to keep the swirling snow out of his eyes, his mind working overtime as he walked;
his thoughts confused and erratic. Part of him wanted to run back to the party and pull Hermione away from Ron. But the
more rational part of him kept him where he was. Knowing that the first idea was completely ludicrous.

After walking for a few minutes, Harry looked up to see where he was. He was startled to find that he had already
reached the site where his parents' graves were.

Snow sitting atop the two headstones glistened in the pale moonlight, adding a sense of morbid beauty.

“Hello, Mum, Dad. It's Harry again. I know I haven't been to see you in while and I'm sorry for that, but I just needed
to come see you again. I guess in some ways I've done everything I was supposed to do, save the world from the ultimate
evil that was Voldemort and all that. But what I wanted most was to have a family. And I thought I'd found the woman to
have that family with. I've told you about Hermione.

“Well I sort of went and fell in love with her. I know you'd love her if you met her. All those things I never noticed
or took for granted sort of all the sudden got my notice while we were looking for the horcruxes. The way her hair
shines in the moonlight or sunlight. Her laugh, her smile. Her eyes, oh Merlin, her eyes. They are the richest chocolate
brown I've ever seen. I could loose myself in them forever if I wanted too. And she doesn't think of me as the famous
`Chosen One' and all that other rubbish. She sees me as just Harry. That alone makes me love her more.

“Things didn't turn out the way I thought they would. She and Ron got together 2 summers ago now. And you know for a
while I thought maybe they were just trying it out, and they would figure out it would not work. But like everything
else in my life, it did not turn out how I wanted.

“She and Ron have been together for 2 years now, like I told you. Well tonight, they made it permanent. Ron proposed, at
the Ministry Christmas Ball. I did not stick around to see the whole thing, I know I should have, being his best friend
and all, but I just couldn't watch him ask the woman I love more than life itself, to be his forever.

“So I left, and came here. It hurts, a lot. It would be like Sirius or Remus with mum, dad. I just cannot get over the
fact that I will not know what it's like to hold her in my arms like Ron does, or what it would be like to kiss her; to
see her face the first thing in the morning.

“To make love to her. To just be with her. It's like everything has shattered at my feet. I guess in a way it's my own
fault. I never should have fallen in love with her. Then I wouldn't be in this mess. And I could be happy for Ron and
Hermione right now. But I'm not and I did, my only regret is not telling her how much I love her.” When he finished
talking, Harry was surprised to find tears streaking down his face, dropping into the snow at his feet.

He reached up quickly and wiped them away, taking a deep, shuddering breath.

“If I could have a chance to tell her, I would. And I'd give her this,” he said, pulling his wand from his pocket. “It's
a charm I found in a book at Grimmauld Place of places, and I practiced it until I got it right. Hoping one day I could
use it to give it to Hermione.”

Whispering a careful incantation, Harry swirled his wand in the air in an intricate pattern as he spoke until a
glittering object appeared. It was a rose, a real rose, sparkling with the magic used to create it.

“It's called The Soul Mates Rose. They are supposed to be rare. The spell works by using your magic to create a rose
that is unique to the soul mates, a physical manifestation of the love you share. It actually weaves your magic into the
rose itself, along with your feelings. And since every witch and wizard's magical signature is different, there are no
two roses that are alike. If it is done correctly, it should sparkle with your magic and it should be the color that you
most associate with your soul mate.

“In my case this rose is a mix of the color of golden honey like Hermione's hair and deep chocolate brown like her eyes.
According to the book, if your love is pure and meant to last, the rose will last forever. So far all the roses I've
been able to create haven't wilted or anything. I wish I could say that's a positive sign, but I think that just
reflects my feelings and not hers.”

Expelling his breath loudly, Harry stepped closer to the gravestones and intending to set the rose on top of it when a
sound behind him stilled his movements.

When he turned around, rose still in hand, he was jolted to find Hermione standing behind him. Tears skittering down her
face.

It was several seconds before Harry found his voice and was able to use it. “W-what are you doing here?” he asked
croakily. He suddenly hoped she hadn't heard what he had said. He didn't want to cause any trouble between her and Ron.
He kept his eyes purposely averted; he knew it would be his undoing if he looked at her.

Yet he couldn't stop himself from looking at her, from taking in everything about her. Her honey brown hair flecked with
snow, her cheeks pink with cold, her expression solemn, and the tears still falling. She looked so beautiful and all he
wanted to do was hold her, chase away her tears, and love her. But he couldn't, she wasn't his to do those things to.
And she never would be.

Hermione's soft voice broke the still silence that had followed his question, drawing his eyes away from her. “I-I came
here looking for you. Y-you left the party early. I couldn't find you, and I-I-I thought I'd come look for you. I
figured you'd be here. Visiting your parents.”

“Yeah, I just suddenly realized that I really didn't want to be there anymore. I never liked that party. Even though
I've only been to it twice, it reminds me too much of all the parties they threw after I got rid of Voldemort. All those
wizards praising me. I had to get out of there. I'm sorry I didn't stay,” he told her quietly, purposely avoiding
telling her the real reason he had left.

“Oh, I thought maybe….” She said, her voice trailing off.

Harry thought he heard disappointment in her voice, but quickly shook himself. You're wishing for things that aren't
there, Potter.

Silence descended upon them one more and last for several long minutes before Hermione spoke again.

“Ron proposed to me tonight. I-“

“Congratulations,” Harry said quietly, swallowing the taste of bile that had suddenly risen up inside him.

“But Harry, I-“

“I know, you wanted to be the one that told me, and since I wasn't there, you figured I was angry about the proposal.
Thinking I was going to feel like the third wheel. Well don't worry Hermione, I promise not to be a third wheel. I
expect Ron will be asking me to be his best man then?” Harry was surprised that he was able to keep the bitterness out
of his voice and speak with a relatively normal voice.

“I didn't give him the chance to get it out actually. I-I-I told him I couldn't marry him.”

“Well then just let him…Wait what did you say?” Harry asked bemused.

“I didn't give him the chance to ask. I told him I couldn't marry him. T-t-that, I do love him but just not the way he
wanted me too. The way I tried to love him. A-a-and that I couldn't lead him on anymore. It wasn't fair to either of
us,” Hermione said, her tears now clinging to her eyelashes like small, delicate pearls.

Once Hermione's words sank in, Harry felt a tiny flare of hope rise inside him. However, just a quickly as it rose, it
died. He should not be feeling this right now. Hermione needed a friend right now. Not some moron with delusions of
grandeur and love.

Therefore, pushing all his thoughts and emotions aside, Harry stepped closer to her and wrapped her in a tight hug. “I'm
sorry, Hermione. I know what that must have cost you to say that to him,” he whispered against her hair as his hand
gently stroked her back.

Warmth that had nothing to do with the heating charm in her coat, spread through Hermione as Harry's arms encircled her.
For the first time in two years, she felt safe and secure in a man's arms. She felt as if she had come home after a long
and difficult journey; which given the circumstances was not too far off.

They stood encircled in each other's arms (as Hermione had wrapped hers around Harry's waist), the snow falling harder
than ever, coating them where they stood.

Pulling away slightly, Hermione smiled at Harry and was about to say thank you when she spotted the rose in his hand.
Letting out a gasp, she automatically reached for it.

“Is that…?”

“…A Soul Mates Rose? Yes, why?” Harry asked, suddenly nervous.

“It's just well; they are supposed to be rare. Only really powerful wizards or witches can conjure them. And even then,
they don't always last. They only last if the wizard or witch the rose is being conjured for is truly the person's soul
mate. They say if that's true, then the rose won't die. They also say that only the two soul mates can touch the rose.
Anyone else who tries gets a nasty shock,” Hermione explained, staring in awe at the rose in Harry's hand.

Harry swallowed nervously again. That hadn't been in the book; in fact, the book had been very vague about the rose's
history and origins. He figured it was because either they were so rare, or that it was because the book was in the
Black Family library. Maybe both.

“Is that right?” he asked, trying desperately to moisten his suddenly dry mouth. What if she couldn't touch it? Did that
mean they weren't soul mates?

“C-c-cause the book I got the spell from, a book that was in Sirius' library for some reason, only said stuff about what
the rose would look like and that it uses your magic to create it. It also said that if the love the soul mates shared
was pure, it would live forever. I didn't know about the other stuff you just told me.”

“Y-y-you found the book in Sirius' library? Wow, I never thought there would be a book like that in there, how odd,”
Hermione said, her voice trailing off as she started to think more on the subject.

“Yeah I know huh? But I thought they were neat and…” he trailed off, not wanting to reveal his real motivation for
wanting to learn such a complex spell.

“And? You wanted to give that to the girl you love didn't you?” Hermione asked, her voice steady despite how she was
slowly falling apart inside. He's probably going to give the rose to Ginny.

“Y-y-yeah, that was my thought. But I wasn't sure if I should…” he said, thinking of how the rose might just be a
representation of his feelings for Hermione and not of hers as well.

But it seemed that Hermione had the answer, as if she knew what he was thinking.

“Harry, you don't have to worry. Apparently, that book of yours left out something very important, now I begin to see
why it was in Sirius' library. What a way to drive someone mad. Give them that spell and their insecurities and
uncertainties will do the rest.

“Anyway, what your book doesn't tell you is that the wizard or witch doing the conjuring has to be powerful yes, but in
order to conjure one at all and to conjure one that doesn't die the intended has to be their soul mate. The spell is so
tricky because it relies on emotions to feed it. Which of course your average spell doesn't. But the emotion flowing
through your magic when you conjure it has to be so powerful, that it can create something like that. Something that
comes from your heart. And your heart always knows. Even when your head doesn't,” Hermione told him, her heart now
pounding furiously in her chest.

“Then…” Harry whispered his voice quiet. Looking back at her, Harry decided to see if everything both the book and
Hermione said were true.

“T-t-then could you hold it?” he asked, hating that his voice was now shaking.

“I-what? But I can't I'm not-“

“Please?” he begged.

Hermione was torn. Torn between her natural curiosity to learn and her fear that the rose was not meant for her at all.
Shaking her head, she held out her hand wordlessly.

Harry placed the sparkling rose in her palm and immediately Hermione felt such heat coming off the rose, she almost
dropped it. Then the emotions that were embedded in the rose swept through her. And she knew. She knew for certain who
the rose was intended. It was her; she was Harry's soul mate.

Tears welling in her eyes again, Hermione looked up to see Harry staring quietly at her, amazement shining on his face.
When they caught each other's eyes, it was easy to read them. Love and happiness shined through brightly as ever.

“Me?” Hermione whispered, wanting confirmation that this was real.

“Yes, it's always been you,” Harry said before stepping forward and capturing her lips. The kiss was firm yet gentle,
greedy yet not too much so, and to Hermione it was perfect.

When they broke apart, Harry leaned his forehead against hers and said, “I love you Hermione.”

“I love you too, Harry,” Hermione whispered, leaning up to kiss him again.

As the couple stood kissing in the gently falling snow, another couple watched them smiling.

“It's about time he had some happiness in his life. Though do you think it was a bit much helping him with the Soul Mate
Roses?” James Potter asked his wife.

“No, I think we did the right thing. He would have found the book eventually. We just gave him a gentle nudge in the
right direction is all. Right Sirius?” Lily Potter said, turning to look at the other man standing beside her.

“Of course, just a little nudge. Just like his mother,” Sirius cracked.

Lily looked at Sirius with a scowl before smiling and saying, “Come on, we've lingered long enough. We have to go back.”

The other two nodded and as they made their way back, Lily looked over her shoulder and whispered, “Have a great life
you two.” And then she was gone.

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