First Love
by Croyez

Rating: PG
Ship: Harry & Hermione
Canon: Books 1 - 4
Genre: Romance
Status: Complete
Length: 896 words in 1 chapter
Published: 20 Apr 2009
Last updated: 20 Apr 2009

“I—I don’t know how to say this. It’s…complicated, I suppose. You’re my friend. I shouldn’t feel this way.” Hermione
reflects on the thin line between love and friendship.

From the Unofficial Portkey Archive: https://portkey-archive.org/story/8399/

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1. First Love

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these character’s, of course. They’re JK’s.

Author’s Note: This is a short snippet I wrote a long time ago. I found it while deleting old stuff from my computer,
and thought I should put it up. It’s told from Hermione’s PoV.

--

“Well, go on, spin it, Harry!”

Seamus’ encouragement seemed to be contagious. In a few moments, everyone was clapping and whooping, egging Harry on. I
was the only girl that had remained silent. I was just watching him, nervous, wondering what would happen when the
bottle landed on one of the other girls. It was stupid, I knew—it was just a kiss, after all—but I couldn’t help my urge
to turn away until his turn was over.

Harry looked at me uncertainly, and I could tell he didn’t want to. I half-shrugged and gave him an imperceptible smile,
hoping to come across as calm and indifferent to the whole situation.

Still uncertain, he looked at everyone else in the circle. Even Ron was cheering for him to spin. He sighed, and it was
clear he wished to be somewhere else as he gave the bottle a spin.

Slowly, it began to come to a halt. I counted exactly eleven seconds until it stopped.

Then I felt a chill run down my spine.

The bottle was pointing straight at me.

I looked up in shock. Everyone stared for a moment, then burst out cheering and patting both Harry and I on the back,
trying to get us to stand up. Harry and I, however, just stared at each other, eyes wide in shock. We both seemed to be
asking each other for help, because we had no idea what we should do.

I don’t remember getting up. All I know was that in less than a few minutes everyone had Harry and I cornered at the
broom cupboard they had conjured for the game. I looked at Harry, unable to conceal my nervousness anymore. What did
this mean? I did fancy him, but we were just friends. It would be awkward for both of us, wouldn’t it?

Then he held my hand. He looked nervous as well, but he smiled reassuringly, as if sensing my thoughts and telling me
that it would be fine, that I shouldn’t worry. I felt myself relax, if only just a bit, as we stepped into the broom
cupboard.

The door shut behind us and I could hear everyone bursting out laughing as we were told we had five minutes.

“Err…”

I looked at him.

“I—weird, isn’t it? You and me…here,” he whispered quietly.

I nodded, “We don’t…have to do anything, you know. This game is stupid.”

He was silent. I couldn’t see him in the dark, so I didn’t know what expression he wore. I couldn’t even make out his
outline, which I confess made me feel a bit insecure—not because I was in the dark with a boy (this was Harry), but
because I had no idea what he might be thinking.

“Well, I—I mean, it’s not that I wouldn’t want to kiss you,” I added softly, “It’s just that…well, you know. This is a
sort of, forced kiss, and—”

“A real kiss is never like that,” he finished, “I know, don’t worry. I was just—thinking, about something else I might
want to do.”

I frowned, and he continued speaking, as if sensing my confusion, “There’s something I’ve kind of been wanting to say
for a while. I—I don’t know if you’ll…it’s just, a good moment, I think, since we’re alone and no one will interrupt
us,” he paused, and I heard him taking a breath as his hands fumbled in the dark. I was pleasantly surprised by the
warmth of his hands on mine as he began to talk again, “I—I don’t know how to say this. It’s…complicated, I suppose.
You’re my friend. I shouldn’t feel this way.”

He sighed, “But I do,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, “What I mean is…I really don’t mind that I’m in here
with you. I-In fact, I don’t think I wanted to get locked in a broom closet with anyone but you, Hermione.”

I laughed softly, my heart beating frantically as I looked at the place where my fingers were intertwined with his. I
couldn’t see anything, but I could feel the warmth and the nervousness that radiated off both our bodies as our hands
came into contact.

“Ron and everyone thinks I like Ginny, but…honestly? S-she doesn’t really…I mean…she’s just…”

His voice trailed away before he gulped and said.

“She’s just not you.”

I licked my lips, trying to think of something to say.

“Harry, I—“

The door of the broom cupboard swung open, revealing the faces of all our classmates as they peeked inside to check on
us. Upon finding that we were only holding hands, they didn’t seem surprised. I even heard a few of the girls laugh
dismissively, as if they had already figured we wouldn’t do anything. Ron looked at us and smiled, shaking his head,
before waving us back to the circle.

I looked at Harry. He was still holding my hand, staring up at me. I couldn’t help the blush that crept to my cheeks as
I was met with his sincere gaze. I smiled, glancing at the floor before meeting his eyes again. Resolved, I leant
forward and kissed his cheek, ever so softly. When I pulled back, he looked rather pink as well. I smiled.
