To See What You See

[Title] - To See What You See
[Author] - Grasshopper (A.K.A. The Undertaker's Muse)
[Email] - uber_bitch13@yahoo.com
[Rated] - PG-13
[Warnings] - Angst.
[Category] - Harry Potter
[Spoilers] - Book two, mainly. The slightest bit for book five; nothing major, though.
[Pairings] - Draco Malfoy/Ginny Weasley
[Summary] - What do you see when you look at me?
[Author's Notes] - This is my first HP fic, so be honest and tell me what you think. I welcome all feedback, including (and especially!) flames.
[Disclaimer] - The only think I own is the plot. All things �Harry Potter� belong to J. K. Rowling. Title and lyrics are from �Instead� by Stacie Orrico.

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A new point of view
A walk in your shoes
I wish I could get inside your head
To see what you see
When you look at me
Cause I could�ve lived your life instead

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What do you see when you look at me?

Do you see �that Weasel girl�? The tagalong little sister, who no one really wants around? Is my Weasley-red hair and ragged Gryffindor robes the only things you see? Is that what makes you turn away in disgust?

Or maybe you see �Potter�s little girlfriend�? You know it�s not true, but still continue down that particular path of ridicule. Merlin, I can barely stand to look at Harry these days without marveling at my own stupidity. Harry never wanted me, I understood that long ago�but the realization that I never really wanted Harry was astounding. By the time I figured that out, I�d wasted a lot of time on him. Luckily, he never seemed to notice why I acted the way I did around him. I think Hermione told him, though�

I could go into all the ways he�s now more like another brother, but I truly do not wish to bore you any more than I likely will.

Perhaps you see me as �Ron�s little sister�? A true statement, I know, but� You seem to dislike Ron even more than you do Harry, and that�s not something I ever believed possible. Ron seems to irritate you on a level that no one else gets to. What did he do to cause that? Not that I don�t think he would or could do something, believe you me I know what my brother�s like, but I wonder� I wonder just what he did to cause that kind of hatred. Am I just another way to get at him? A living, breathing target for your frustrations?

Am I �the mudblood�s best friend�? That isn�t true, by the way. �Mione, Ron, and Harry are quite happy to spend the rest of their lives looking out for one another in the way only the best of friends do. I� I�m stuck in the category of little sister and friendly acquaintance. She cares for me in her own way, but if it came down to a choice she would choose my brother and Harry over me in an instant.

Or maybe� Maybe your disgust comes from the truth. The truth and reality of just who Virginia Anne Weasley is. Who I am now and who I always will be. The truth is, I�m a pureblooded witch. I�m from a rather poor family. I have no particular prejudices; especially not in the case of muggles and muggle-born. I�m a Gryffindor, through and through. I�m�much more than everyone believes me to be.

I�m not simply the only female among my siblings. I�m not just another impulsive Gryffindor. I am not to be measured next to the people I�m surrounded by. I am my own person and deserve to be treated with due respect! I am smart, brave, and a damn good Seeker. With so many brothers, I learned to defend myself as well as to hide my emotions. Couldn�t let the twins know how embarrassed I was� Couldn�t let Ron know about my crush on Harry� Couldn�t let Percy know he was a bloody stupid git for hurting Mum and Dad like that�

Sorry, I�m getting off topic. I�ll try not to do that again.

I could have been in Slytherin, y�know. I should�ve been. If I hadn�t been so worried about my family�s reaction, I never would�ve insisted upon Gryffindor. I wanted to be unique; to be known. What better way than for a Weasley to be sorted into Slytherin? But I could just hear Mum�s voice, screeching about the indignity of it all. I could see my father�s stern face, letting my know his disappointment by remaining silent. I didn�t care overmuch how my brothers would react, but I knew when Ron found out he�d be absolutely furious. At that point, I wasn�t sure enough about myself to take a risk like that. So I joined the ranks of the brave and became a Gryffindor.

But I do wonder� I wonder how my first year would�ve gone then, if I had been a Slytherin. Would your father still have given me Voldemort�s diary? Would Tom still have used me to do all of those terrible things? Would I still have been everyone�s pawn? Would you have seen me as my own entity, rather than an extension of others? Or would I remain as I am now�a silly little girl not fit to lick the mud from your boots?

What a first year I had, eh? Oh, what a silly little girl I was then�smitten with the one person who would never notice me, possessed by the teenaged spirit of the Dark Lord, and yet more fodder for your feud with Harry, Ron, and Hermione. I just wish you could have hated me upon my own merit, not because of who I was related to. If I, myself, had done something to truly piss you off, I could have understood�but there was nothing. Nothing at all.

So, I�m left to wondering� And wondering isn�t the best thing for a person, you know. It brings so many thoughts to mind that one can�t block out painful memories. It all just bubbles up to the surface and is there for scrutiny.

Again, I seem to be getting off the subject. You bring that out in me, I suppose. But I�d best leave things right here, for now. Just one last thing�

What do you see when you look at me, Draco? What do you see?

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