A Kiss To Remember

“You know, I like spending time with you,” Harry said fondly as he twirled a piece of Hermione’s hair in his hand.

“Oh really?” she answered half-interestedly, her eyes not leaving the pages of the book she was reading. “That’s nice to know, seeing as we’re boyfriend and girlfriend.”

Harry chuckled, causing Hermione’s head, which was resting upon his lap, to shake. “You know what I mean. Ron’s nice and all, but he just doesn’t have the finer, womanly assets that you possess,” he said, bending over and placing a kiss on her forehead.

Hermione sighed, rolling her eyes and knowing that she wasn’t going to be able to finish her chapter tonight. She got up and kissed Harry back. “I can’t read books with you… you’re too much of a distraction.” They kissed again, Hermione’s arms coming to rest around his neck and Harry’s encircling her waist. “Mmm…” Hermione said satisfyingly, closing her eyes as she made the noise. With the firelight dancing upon her face, Harry found her incredibly sexy at that point.

“I have to know,” Hermione asked, her eyes fluttering open with a dreamy look in her eyes, “What was your first kiss like?”

Harry’s brow furrowed. “Why?” he asked.

Hermione shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re such a good kisser and all,” she winked. “It just got me wondering.”

Harry’s gaze drifted down to the floor as he felt a blush creep up his cheeks. The discussion was slightly uncomfortable, and he would have thought that it would be with Hermione as well, seeing as his first kiss wasn’t (unfortunately) with her.

“You were there when Ron asked,” he stated, reflecting upon the time he returned to the Gryffindor Common Room after his encounter with Cho.

“Yeah, I know, but I can tell that you didn’t tell everything,” Hermione said. “Now come on, spit it out! I know it was with Cho, so I’m not going to get mad at you or anything.”

Harry sighed. “Okay, well it was wet, like I said back in fifth year. She started crying because of, like you cleared up later on, of her conflicting feelings about Cedric and me.”

Hermione huffed. “I know about her feelings. But what did you feel?”

“How do you think I felt? She started crying! I felt stupid and didn’t know what to do!” he exclaimed.

Hermione smiled. “But before that… before you knew that it was going to end horribly.”

“Thanks for that.”

“No problem.” She leaned back onto the couch and balanced her head upon her arm, eager to listen. “Now don’t change the subject.”

“Fine, fine.” Harry paused. “This is really weird…”

Hermione lightly hit him with one of the scarlet throw pillows on the Gryffindor couch. “Come on, Harry! We’re a couple… we’re supposed to open up to each other!”

Harry glared up at the ceiling. “It felt nice, I guess. I mean, I really liked her at the time, right? So of course I was happy when we kissed.” His eyes made contact with Hermione, who looked as if she were expecting more. “That’s it.”

“That’s it?!” she exclaimed.

“That’s it,” Harry repeated. “What more is there? That’s when she broke down crying and it all went downhill from there.”

“I can’t believe that that’s all… wow, boys are nothing like girls…”

“ ‘Course not! Girls are the fairer sex after all,” he leaned forward and kissed her again. She didn’t respond very enthusiastically. “What’s wrong?” he questioned, drawing back.

“Oh nothing… I was just expecting more, that’s all.”

Seeing that she wasn’t going to give up on the subject anytime soon, Harry decided that if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. “Alright, what was your first kiss like then?”

Hermione looked thoughtfully into the fireplace. “W-ell…” she started skeptically.

“I probably already know, too. Let me guess… it was Viktor. Or even Ron!” Harry said, feeling very indifferent about who Hermione’s first kiss was, seeing as he probably already knew about it. Quite like how Hermione wasn’t bothered with his first kiss with Cho…

“No. It wasn’t Viktor or Ron.”

Harry’s heart skipped a beat. “Excuse me?” he said, suddenly not feeling very indifferent anymore. “Who was it?” he demanded a little too loudly.

This didn’t faze Hermione for she was looking a little dreamy, which irked Harry at that moment. “It was this boy I’ve known since primary school. His name was Benjamin, but I just called him Benji.”

“Benji?!” Harry almost shouted, then remembering to keep his voice down for everyone else was asleep in their dormitories. “You had a pet name for him and everything?”

Hermione scoffed. “Don’t be silly. A pet name? Everyone called him that!”

“Oh,” Harry said shortly.

“But yes, we were childhood friends. He was really nice to me, even when we were little and most boys were in the ‘girls are yucky’ stage. Yeah… he used to push me on the swings when we went to the park together…”

Harry shifted on the couch. He didn’t like the mental picture of another guy pushing Hermione on the swings… even if the gesture was seemingly innocent.

“It happened right after fifth year. He had noticed that I was feeling and looking unusually stressed so we talked a lot during that summer. Of course I couldn’t tell him everything that was stressing me out.”

Harry coughed. The summer after fifth year… right when little stirrings in his stomach began at the thought of Hermione… uncomfortable was an understatement. But by the far-off look on her face, it didn’t look as if she were going to stop talking.

“So anyway, when he tried to cheer me up, he brought me to the park… the one we always went to when we were small. But as we were walking, it started raining, and it only got harder. So there we were, walking in the whipping rain and then… he kissed me.” She sighed musingly. “That was Benji. I know it must sound pretty lame… not getting my first kiss until the age of—Harry, you okay?”

Harry sat there rigidly. “What happened to… Benji?” he asked.

“Oh, he moved away during the summer after sixth year. We still keep in touch though, but we’ve been pretty distant as of late.” Silence followed. The two of them sat in silence, and the vibes radiating off of Harry weren’t very pleasant.

“You’re not upset, are you?” Hermione asked.

“No. Not. At. All.” He continued staring blankly into the fire.

“Yes, I believe you as much as I believe that Professor Snape enjoys candlelit dinners and walks on the beach.” She scooted closer to him. “Harry, you have nothing to be upset about! We’re together now, aren’t we?”

“Yes.”

“Then isn’t that what matters?” She began kissing his cheek, then his chin and finally coming upon his lips. Harry didn’t respond. She pulled back, irritated. “You’re being ridiculous, Harry. I have no feelings for Benji!” She saw a slight twitch in Harry’s eye. “Benjamin! Look, I’ll call him Benjamin from now on! I won’t even mention him, if that’s what you want!”

“No… it’s not what I want. It’s just—“ he blew at his fringe. “I don’t like the way you talk about him.”

Hermione frowned. “Exactly how do I talk about him? What’s so different about the way I talk about him than when I comment on the weather?”

Harry shrugged. “I don’t know! It’s just that… you get this… thing in your eye!”

“I get a thing in my eye?” Hermione raised her eyebrows.

Harry got up from the couch and began pacing. He, himself, was beginning to wonder why Benji… er… Benjamin, was annoying him so much. “Yes! This look. A look that… oh never mind!”

“No, Harry, tell me,” she said firmly, standing up too.

“No. I sound like some terrible, jealous monster.”

“But you’re jealous, aren’t you?”

Harry didn’t reply.

“Harry! You have nothing to be jealous about! You want to know what happened after my kiss with Benji—er—amin? We laughed. We laughed because it felt weird. We laughed because we knew that nothing was going to happen between us because the kiss was weird. So after the kiss, we walked to the arcade, soaking wet, and played a round of air hockey. What’s to be jealous about that?”

Harry mumbled incoherently. But he finally said, “I don’t know, Hermione. Maybe I just have to sleep on it or something. I’m going to bed.” He gave a quick, half-hearted kiss on the cheek. Any quicker, he would have missed her cheek entirely.

“Fine then. Night, Harry.” She turned on her heel and marched off to her room without so much as a backwards glance.

After a few minutes, Harry did the same.

Harry didn’t have a very restful sleep that night. The next day, the thought of Benji still reigned in his mind and he was feeling quite bitter about it. Ron and the other seventh year Gryffindors could sense his foul mood and chose not to bring it up… better yet to just steer clear from him, for they were not in the dormitory once Harry emerged from the shower.

He personally didn’t care. The thoughts of some strange guy kissing his girlfriend haunted his mind, and it didn’t help that he had no clue as to what the guy looked like. His imagination got the better of him, and he was left envisioning some muscle-bound sex god sweeping Hermione off her feet. He had the actual urge to growl as he pulled his socks on.

He had a plan though. He contemplated the details of his plan as he pulled his school robes on. If he could just give a kiss to Hermione that will knock stupid Benji out of her head…

Determined to execute it? Yes. Ill thought of? Yes. Going to go on with it anyway? Oh, yes.

* * *

To his surprise, Hermione waited for him that morning. Sure, she always did, but considering their less-than-friendly attitude towards one another the night before, he didn’t think she’d bother. Seeing her there made some of his annoyance flutter away, but the thought of Benji still nagged him.

“Harry!” she exclaimed upon seeing him.

“‘Lo, Hermione,” Harry replied in a low voice.

“Look, I’m sorry about last night, Harry. I really am,” she said sincerely, her eyes sparkling in concern.

“I-It’s okay,” Harry said, comforted that she truly was sorry, but fleeting visions of a muscle-bound sex god still there. He stirred up the courage in his body…

“If you’re still a little angry then – mmph!”

Hermione’s breath was immediately caught short as Harry’s lips came crashing down upon hers. Why on earth was he kissing her?

Harry felt her hands snake up to his chest and at first he thought that his plan had succeeded… until she gave a mighty push and he was sent flying backwards. Luckily he didn’t fall flat on his back.

“What are you doing?!” she demanded, hands on her hips.

“Kissing you, what does it look like?” Harry answered, straightening himself out.

“Here?! Now?! Without so much as a warning?!” Hermione whispered angrily. Looking around, Harry realized that indeed, they were not alone in the Common Room. Some first years were peering over the couch curiously, some third years were giggling madly, and a group of fifth year boys were laughing heartily as they elbowed each other. One of them sent a thumbs-up Harry’s way. “What were you thinking?”

“Well, what’s wrong with kissing my girlfriend?” Harry said, stumbling over his words a bit. Hermione rolled her eyes and started tapping her foot impatiently against the carpet floor. Whipping around, the interested group of people watching scrambled to look neutral. Harry could almost see the steam coming out of her ears.

“This is none of your business! Go to breakfast!” she barked. Not wanting to mess with the Head Girl under a temper, everyone dashed towards the exit of the Common Room. She whipped back to face Harry. “I just thought that you needed more time or something to get over Benjamin. It just took me off guard. And it doesn’t seem like your normal behaviour.”

“I’m fine about… Benjamin,” Harry said, lying through his teeth.

Hermione peered at him, realization dawning upon her. “Oh, I know what you’re trying to do.”

Harry cursed the fact that his girlfriend was a bloody genius.

“Harry, that is so juvenile. I’m telling you, you’ll be better off just forgetting I ever mentioned Benjamin! Believe me… you’re turning into some horrible, jealous boyfriend. And there’s nothing to be jealous about!” She gently grabbed a hold of his arms. “Now, let’s go down to breakfast and… just act normal.”

Harry didn’t answer, but followed her down to the Great Hall anyway.

Hearing her dismiss his “plan” just fuelled his determination even more. He just needed to execute it better.

* * *

“What are the three most important ingredients in a Shape shifting Drought?”

Harry tapped his quill against the table, thinking hard. And it wasn’t about the question.

He and Hermione were spending their lunch studying for their Potions test. Potions was hard, as usual, but even more so, considering it was for their Potions N.E.W.T.

“Harry?” Suddenly, Hermione nearly dropped the book in her hands. It oddly felt like Harry’s hand was caressing her thigh. “What are you doing?” she asked.

“Helping you relax for the test,” Harry answered. He smiled as he brought himself closer to her. She smiled too, her eyes drooping closed as his lips came to meet hers. The kiss was gentle and sweet, and Hermione really did feel a lot more relaxed for the test. She pulled back from him a little, her hands still tangled in his hair. “Thanks, Harry, that was—“ She stopped short. “You’re doing it again!” she suddenly cried.

Harry was startled for a moment. “Doing what?” he queried, though he knew full well what he was doing.

“You’re… you’re trying to… drive Benjamin away from my mind completely or something that relates to your testosterone needs!” Hermione started gathering up her books and shoving them into her bag. “Look, Harry,” she said as she shoved gigantic tomes with spite. “I know that’s what you want to do. You feel threatened or something just because Benjamin was my first kiss. You want me to forget about him! But Harry, I have to be totally honest with you… I can’t.”

Her words were harsh, and maybe she shouldn’t have said them. Either way, it hurt… and it annoyed.

“I can’t just forget about Benjamin, okay? He was a part of my life even before I met you and Ron. He gave me my first kiss, and that’s just something you don’t really forget about. I’m so sorry, but it’s the truth!”

“You know what, Hermione? Maybe you should just get together with Benji. You obviously seem absolutely smitten with him!” Harry began shoving books into his own bag too.

“Stop saying things that you know aren’t true!” Hermione spat, slamming her book down.

“How am I supposed to know they aren’t true? For all I know, Benji might be your boyfriend during the summer!” Harry slammed his book down.

“You are being so thick!” Hermione yelled, thumping her book down once again. “It was just that one, bloody kiss. He moved away and lives in Australia now, so there’s no way I am having halfway around the world affairs with him! Now stop being so insecure and get over it! I’m not freaking out because your first kiss was with Cho, so I don’t see why this is such an issue for you!”

“It’s different,” Harry said heatedly. “You know who Cho is. I don’t even know what Benji looks like and I just heard all about him last night.”

“Fine, Harry, if that’s the way you’re going to take this.” Hermione slung her bag around her shoulder and took a deep breath in order to calm herself down a bit. “I’m going to leave you alone with your gnawing, absolutely useless, thoughts of Benjamin. I’m going to class.” She stalked off, much like the night before, not giving a backwards glance.

Harry stood there, rooted to the spot. He only started moving when Madam Pince came sauntering over and began giving him a long lecture on keeping quiet in the library and that slamming books on the table could damage them. Only then did he reluctantly make his way, also, to class, dreading that Hermione was going to be there too.

* * *

Author’s Notes: Yes, well, this wasn’t supposed to be going on this long. I figured that this was going to be done in two, maybe three, chapters… but it kind of seems longer than that now. I’m just letting it all go with the flow!

Harry dragged his feet into the dreary, dungeon classroom, planning on taking a seat next to Dean, or Neville, or anybody, but seeing that Dean and Neville were already sitting next to each other, he sat down next to Hermione. Fate had obviously had its own, predictable, plans.

She didn’t acknowledge his presence at that moment, which didn’t matter, because Professor Snape’s oily voice soon echoed within the dungeon as he began their lesson. Harry lazily took down notes, his mind awfully blank from the absence of Hermione chastising him to pay attention and whatnot.

“After copying the ingredients down, I want you to start. We’ll be testing these on Mr. Potter right before class ends…” The malicious look from Snape and the offhand comment (or rather, threat) as he bore his eyes into Harry’s didn’t faze him. He had more important things to worry about.

Harry grabbed a few figs for slicing as Hermione worked on the spiders’ legs right next to him. After cutting the required amount of figs, Harry placed it into the cauldron and started upon the newts’ tails.

“You’re being unreasonable,” Hermione whispered out of the side of her mouth, but her eyes not peeling away from the spiders in front of her.

“What do you mean I’m being unreasonable? The directions say clearly that we put the figs in first!” Harry whispered back vehemently.

Hermione stopped working on the spiders and looked crossly into Harry’s eyes. “That’s not what I’m talking about, and you know it.”

“I’m sorry okay? What do you want me to do about it?” He swiped the first newts’ tail off violently.

“I want you to stop acting like a prat!” Hermione spat. “You’re stressing over nothing! I feel like you don’t believe me when I say that I’m not cheating on you.”

Harry knew that they weren’t having a secret affair, but he just couldn’t get over the fact at how much knowing about Benji made him upset. He was just about to open his mouth and say something, when the sound of billowing robes came up behind he and Hermione.

“I would greatly appreciate it, if you two Gryffindor loudmouths would keep quiet during my lesson. Detention, both of you, tonight in my office.”

“Look what you did,” Hermione said immaturely, but too peeved to care.

“Let’s make that tomorrow night too. Eight sharp,” Snape said to them. Harry and Hermione were wise enough to not say anything further, though there were quite a few obscenities flashing in both their minds.

* * *

Harry decided to skip dinner that night so he wouldn’t have to walk down to Snape’s office with Hermione in stony silence. So when the clock chimed eight times, he made his way out of Gryffindor Tower and down below to the dungeons.

He met Hermione at the door to Snape’s office, and the two of them gave curt nods to each other. She knocked lightly on the door and a few seconds later, Snape swept it open, looking menacingly at them. Without so much as a word of greeting (or even an insult) Snape led them inside the Potions classroom and directed them to a gigantic cauldron practically overflowing with soap and water.

“There are jars on my desk that need cleaning. I want every one of them spotless before you go back.” He left, slamming the door with a deafening noise.

Hermione took off her school robe and rolled up the sleeves of her blouse. “Might as well start. This is going to take a long time.”

Harry hurriedly took off his school robe and rolled up his sleeves as well. Snape’s desk held countless jars, all of which seemed to have a layer of sticky, black stuff.

“Ugh… what was in here?” he asked, disgusted. He picked one up, and even at arm’s length, he could smell a putrid odour emanating from it.

“I don’t think we want to know,” Hermione said, plunging her first jar into the cauldron of soap and water. “Snape left us some sponges over there,” she said casually.

“Nicest thing he’s done to us,” Harry said. He heard something that sounded like a light laugh, but when he turned around, he only saw Hermione sniffing and continuing to clean the jar underneath the water. Harry grabbed a sponge and set to work as well.

For the longest time, none of them said a word, and Harry thought that this was torture. Time was going slow, he was cleaning God-knows-what out of jars that smelled funky, and he couldn’t even start a conversation with his girlfriend… or… at least he thought she was still his girlfriend.

All of a sudden, something slimy made contact with Harry’s hand. He let out a yelp. “Augh! I touched something!”

Hermione snickered. “It was just my hand,” she said. Then sobering herself up, they worked quietly again.

Harry timidly looked at Hermione from across the giant cauldron. Her head was bent down as she gave full concentration to the jar she was cleaning, but he could tell that she was feeling the way he was right now. Feeling around underwater, he took a hold of her hand.

“Ack! Something’s got me!” she cried, fighting to yank her hand out of the water.

“Relax, it’s just me,” Harry said. He felt her loosen up and with a shy smile, gave his hand a squeeze. Then she wiggled it out of his grasp and went back to cleaning. “Hermione… I just want to say…”

“It’s okay, Harry,” she said before he could finish his sentence.

“No… no it’s not okay! It’s—“

Hermione sighed and ceased scrubbing furiously at the jar. She looked at him squarely in the eye and said, “Harry, I’m glad you know that it’s not okay, what you did. But… maybe we should… take a break or something. I want to know for sure that you trust me, so in order to do that-“ she spoke slowly so he could absorb every word “- maybe we should spend some time apart as boyfriend and girlfriend… so we can think about it.”

A dull thud signaled Harry dropping his jar in the cauldron of water. His head was spinning and his limbs ceased working.

“Are you breaking up with me?” he asked, scared at what her answer may be.

“No!” Hermione quickly responded. “No, I’m not breaking up with you. I just think… maybe you should re-evaluate your trust in me.” She apprehensively looked up at him. “I-I’m sorry. But I think it’s for the best.”

Harry swallowed multiple times. Turning away from her gaze, he fished out the jar from the bottom of the cauldron and set to scrubbing. After a few long seconds, he sighed dejectedly. “If that’s what you want then.”

The detention couldn’t have been over fast enough.

* * *

“It’s Hogsmeade weekend this week,” Ron said excitedly over breakfast the next day. “You doing anything with Hermione?”

Harry looked down the table to see Hermione reading The Daily Prophet in the company of Ginny, which she sometimes did so it didn’t appear suspicious to Ron. But Harry knew better…

“No.” He suddenly didn’t feel hungry anymore.

“Really? Didn’t you tell me earlier this week that you were doing something--?”

“We’re taking a break.” There, he had said the damned words. Ron was shocked into silence.

When he finally opened his mouth, he said, “Seriously?”

“Seriously,” Harry repeated, dully scraping his fork against his plate.

“Wow, mate, that’s… that’s tough,” Ron said. “What happened between you two?”

As Harry watched Hermione not take her eyes off her newspaper and do so much as look at him, sitting only a few seats away, he answered, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

* * *

Harry skipped lunch again that day only to avoid watching Hermione ignore him. Well, she really didn’t ignore him, but her behavior was just so much different than he was used to. He was used to a warm smile or the occasional kiss on the cheek for a greeting… not a timid smile and a stuttered “good morning”. He was used to her sitting down with him at mealtimes and laughing with him and Ron and taking a hold of his hand under the table. He wasn’t used to her sitting seats away from him at all meals, avoiding eye contact.

He pulled at some stray threads on his bedspread, glad that everyone was down in the Great Hall eating. He felt alone, so he was alone.

He stopped picking at the thread and rolled over on his bed to lie down on his back. He stared bleakly at the ceiling, wanting to bash his head in for screwing up royally.

His plan didn’t work out. Hermione was just too smart.

And contrary to some movies’ portrayal, a jealous boyfriend doesn’t always turn out into a romantic situation. Rather, it drilled you down into the ground and left you for dead.

He raised his hand to look at his watch and saw that lunch was almost over. He really didn’t want to go to class… it was Potions and Hermione was the only person he sat next to in that class. Ron had chosen not to take the N.E.W.T. Potions class and Dean and Neville (who was surprisingly accepted) usually sat next to one another.

Harry didn’t like the feeling of Hermione not being his girlfriend. He never thought he’d experience this feeling as he had first thought she wouldn’t become his girlfriend, but now that he was… he hated it. He hated it so much. He had to have her back.

He loved her and he had to show her that he trusted her.

Maybe it was time that he started working on a new plan.