Rating: PG
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 31/01/2004
Last Updated: 01/02/2004
Status: Completed
After the disastrous proposal in "A Comedy of Errors", Harry and Hermione decided to get married. Both decided that they've had enough of excitement to last them a lifetime during the proposal and only wish for a perfect and quiet wedding. Will their wish be granted? Sequel to "A Comedy of Errors" with ideas from the challenge "A Very Crazy Wedding". Please read and review.
Remember to read "A Comedy of Errors" first at Portkey.org or FictionAlley.org or FanFiction.net or HPFanFiction.com. Though it is not necessary to do so in order to understand, it'll help to clarify a few things.
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A Wedding Full of Errors- The Errors of the Arrival
Professor Hermione Granger, the Charm professor of Hogwarts, sat down a pile of N.E.W.T. exam paper, which she had just marked, on her table.
"Finished!" Hermione said contently as she stretched.
Hermione had been a Hogwarts teacher for exactly one year. She took over Professor Filtwick's position, when he retired, straight after her graduation. Hermione was proud to find a job so soon after her graduation. Many of her friends were still struggling to get a decent job. Another great thing about being the Charm professor was that she could see her fiancée, Harry Potter, just about everyday. Harry Potter took up the vacant Defense Against Dark Arts position at the same time as Hermione took Charm. The fact that no one wanted the Defense Against Dark Arts position and that Harry was the Boy-Who-Lived really helped him in getting that position.
As Hermione looked at the pile of marked exam papers, she couldn't help but remember the events of the day after her own N.E.W.T. exam the year before. She smiled as she remember the disastrous proposal she had received from Harry, with the helps of their friends, Ron and Luna.
Oh yes, Luna and Ron's little sister, Ginny, were still in Hogwarts. Of course Hermione taught them. In fact, she had just marked their papers.
"Hermione!" a male's voice rang in Hermione ears, which caused her to jump.
"Harry Potter!" exclaimed Hermione. "You... you nearly frightened me to death!"
Her fiancée smiled mischievously in front of her. "Oh, my darling Hermione! As you've said, I nearly frightened you to death. And that means that you are not dead yet. So, no harm done! What have you been thinking with that smile on your face? I've been standing here, trying to catch your attention for the last ten minutes!"
Hermione gave Harry a hug. "Nothing, just thinking about your disastrous proposal. Doesn't time fly?"
"Yes, it does," said Harry, who gave Hermione a short kiss on the lips. "While we are on the subject, I think we should get married this summer. After all, we have been engaged for a year. I promise it won't be a disaster this time."
"So it's going to be a catastrophe?" joked Hermione. "It's all right, I'm going to do all the work this time and Ron and his girlfriend, Luna, are not going to help. Is that a deal?"
Harry agreed wholeheartedly. "Of course. Had it not been for Ron last time, everything would have been perfect. But we do have to have Ron for our Best Man though. He is our best friend."
"And Ginny as the Maid of Honor. The problem is, we'll have to invite Draco Malfoy if we are going to have her."
"Well, you can't have everything in life. Anyhow, you said it yourself that Malfoy is a lot nicer after he dated Ginny."
"True. Oh, and Harry? My parents said that I must have a Muggle wedding ceremony. So we'll have to be married in a church. Is that all right with you?" asked Hermione.
Harry replied, "Of course it's all right. I myself would like to married in a church. Just think how excited Mr. Weasley would be!"
"I'm sure he'll be thrilled," laughed Hermione. If there's a wizard Guineas Book of World Record, Mr. Wealsey would certainly be in it for being the most Muggle-obssessed wizard ever lived.
At the end of the evening, Harry and Hermione decided that they would be married on July the 23rd, a week before Harry's birthday. So they could celebrate Harry's 19th birthday as husband as wife.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
On the morning of July the 23rd, the house of Granger was a mess. Unwrapped wedding gifts (both Harry and Hermione nearly drowned in wedding gifts upon the announcement of their wedding date), clothes from the bridal shop, wrapping papers, cards, flowers were all discarded on the floor. There were still around a thousand owls with cards and parcels tied on their legs, waiting to deliver their gifts, crowded around the street of Hermione and her parents' house.
"Hermione!" called Mr. Granger. "How can you get rid of these owls...."
"Hermione!" called Mrs. Granger. "Where should I keep all these chocolate? There are chocolate sent from all over the world! Belgium, Swiss, French, Italian, Japanese, Chinese, Austrian, Australian...."
"Hermione!" called their Muggle neighbor, Mrs. Fonda. "Who's this fellow you are marrying? Harry Potter? I've ever heard of the name, but he seems to be so famous...."
"Hermione...."
"Hermione...."
"Hermione...."
Up in her room, Hermione buried her head under the pillow. Why would she marry the Boy-Who-Lived? Why wouldn't she just eloped with Harry? All these questions were driving her up the wall.
"Hermione? Hermione? Open the door!" Ginny's voice called.
Hermione opened her door and let Ginny inside. "What is it?"
Ginny was already dressed in her Maid of Honor gown. The dress, which had been handpicked by Hermione herself, was of a soft lilac color. It was beautiful. Ginny eyed Hermione's pure white satin bride's gown lying on her chair. "Hermione, aren't you going to marry Harry?"
Hermione sighed. "I wish I wasn't. I wish I had eloped with him instead. Just look at all these trouble the wedding caused." She pulled up her curtain and indicated outside. "Look at that flock of birds. There are even eagles and ravens among that lot. With all those birds around, I'm not even going to be able to get into the car! I bet our house is on the Muggle news report today."
Ginny laughed. "You should have known that when you decided to marry Harry. Consider your intelligence and Harry's fame, you should have long been expecting this. You'd better get dressed and get ready for the ceremony. My dad is coming to pick you up in his modified Muggle car in another hour. You don't want to keep Harry waiting, do you?"
"No," Hermione sighed and pulled out her wand. "Vestamos!" With a wave of her wand, she was dressed instantly. "Kosca!" With another wave of her wand, Hermione's hair had been plaited with pretty little white flowers. Ginny helped her to put some make-ups on her face and the veil on her magic-plaited hair. before the hour was up, Hermione was done.
Suddenly, Mrs. Weasley's voice called from the first floor. "Hermione! Arthur is here with his car, ready to take you to the church. But the trouble is, he can't get into this street and had to park on the main road with all those birds blocking this street. You and your parents will have to walk to the main road!"
"Oh no!" moaned Hermione. "I don't want to walk all the way out there. It's the middle of summer and I'll melt down to a pile of sweat before I reach your dad's car! I'm in my bridal dress too. Just look at how long it is! Do you think I can make it?"
Ginny was clearly annoyed about having to walk to the car as well. She, however, kept her cool and scolded Hermione lightly, "Save your groans and moans for tonight, Hermione. And don't melt before then. If we have to walk to get to the car, walking it is going to be." Ginny opened the door and dragged Hermione out with her.
"I'm walking! I'm walking! Don't drag me!" Hermione pulled out of Ginny's grasp. "If I have to walk, I'm not going to be dragged. I'm going to walk with all the dignity I can manage."
Hermione, in her long dress, opened her front door with her parents, Mrs. Weasley, Ginny and other brides maids behind her. They were instantly attacked by the birds as they all flew into the house, wanting to make their deliveries.
"Hermione! Tell these birds to go away!" shouted Mr. Granger.
"Hermione! I lost my glasses!" screamed Mrs. Granger.
Some of the brides maids screamed in terror. Others burst into tears.
Hermione waved her hands about her wildly as she screamed. "There's no way out. These birds will peck us to death! Run for your life!"
The others echoed Hermione's battle cry. "To the main road! Arragh!"
It was a sight to see. A group of people, all dressed in gowns and suits, springing down the street with a large flock of birds behind and around them. A news reporter at the end of the street, who was about to report the incident of birds gathered and blocked the street, stood with her jaw dropped as she saw the group of people running towards her. The camera man beside her was equally stunned as his camera captured the whole event unintentionally.
"Where's Mr. Weasley's car?" yelled Hermione. By now, her wedding dress had been ruined by bird droppings and dirt on the street. Her veil had disappeared and she had lost her shoes in the rush. Along with the white flowers, feathers of many kind also adorned her now un-plaited hair.
"I don't know, I wasn't with Dad when he parked," shouted Ginny, who was in an equally terrible state.
"He should be around here somewhere," bellowed Mrs. Weasley. "There it is! That little white car parked over there!"
Mr. Granger gasped. "That is tiny! How are we all going to fit?"
No one answered Mr. Granger's question. The group ran as fast as they could to Mr. Weasley's car. Mrs. Weasley opened the door and hopped in the back seat. The group followed her. Ginny, who was last to get on, shut the door as soon as she hopped in, in order to prevent birds from flying into their car.
To Mr. and Mrs. Granger's amazement, the group all fitted in comfortably. There was even a little spare space left.
"Wow! I must get a car like this! Where did you get it, Arthur?" exclaimed Mr. Granger.
"I made it myself," said Mr. Weasley proudly. "There's no time to explain now. We must get to the church or we'll be late."
Hermione glanced at her watch. "We are terribly late already! The ceremony should have started ten minutes ago! And just look at us! We can't go to a wedding like this! I can't be married in rags!"
Mrs. Weasley said soothingly, "It's all right. We'll be fine. Harry will wait for you, I'm sure. Just tidy yourself the best you can on the way. Arthur, go!"
As Mr. Weasley stepped on the accelerator, the girls began to magically repair their appearances. Although they could repair the torn dresses and clean the dirty spots, they couldn't transfigure anything to replace the things they had lost. Therefore, Hermione had to get married barefooted and veil-less. Her Maid of Honor had only one glove. Poor Mrs. Granger wouldn't even be able to see her daughter's wedding properly as she had lost her glasses.
The bird chase was still not over. As Mr. Weasley drove, the flock of birds fallowed their car.
"Dad! The birds are pecking our car!" screamed Ginny as she the window next to her was smashed by birds' beaks.
More and more birds flocked around the car and eventually surrounded it totally. By that time, Mr. Weasley had trouble driving because he couldn't see the road.
"Molly, can't we just..." begged Mr. Weasley.
"No.... All right, just this once. Are you sure the invisibility button won't fail this time?"
"Absolutely," answered Mr. Weasley cheerfully as he pressed the invisibility button. Suddenly, the car disappeared and the birds didn't know where to follow. Finally, they had gotten rid of the birds. Mr. Weasley pulled the car towards the sky. "Hold on, everyone!"
Mr. Granger shouted in horror, "What is this? Where's the car? Why can't I see anything? Where are you, Hermione?"
Hermione's voice answered her father. "It's all right, Dad. You are ok. You are still in the car with the rest of us. We'll be there soon."
Meanwhile, Mrs. Granger noticed that the invisible car was extraordinarily quiet. She couldn't even hear the turning of the car engine. "Isn't it a bit quiet?"
The car flashed back into everyone's vision. Mrs. Weasley glared at Mr. Weasley angrily. "I thought you said that the invisibility button won't fail this time! And why aren't we moving?"
Mr. Weasley looked about, not knowing what was wrong.
Mr. Granger glanced at the driver's seat for a second before he realized in horror. "We've run out of petrol!"
"What is p..." before Mr. Weasley could finish, the car began to fall.
"Arrragh!" everyone in the car began to scream as it dropped towards the ground at the speed of 100km/hr.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
In a small church on the outskirt of London, Harry and his guests waited impatiently for the bride. The church was very crowded. Many people were there without being invited. After all, the Boy-Who-Lived getting married was a big event in the wizard community. Not only was the church packed with people, the lawn outside was also surrounded by people. It seemed as if every wizard living in England was there to take part in the ceremony. Daily Prophet's reporters surrounded Harry as they waited for Hermione and bombarded him with questions.
"Mr. Potter, was it true that your proposal to Miss Granger had been a total disaster?" asked a reporter.
"Mr. Potter, was it real that the entire school of Hogwarts witnessed your proposal?"
"Mr. Potter, did you really lose your engagement ring you planned to give to Miss Granger on the night you proposed?"
Harry was very annoyed. Partly because Hermione was already one hour late and partly because he hated those silly questions. He pulled Ron over to the side and told him, "Get those annoying reporters out of here. I don't want them anywhere near my wedding."
"Ok, just watch me kick their ass," said Ron and was ready to attack.
However, Harry pull Ron back in the last minute. "Wait, have you still got the wedding rings in your pocket? I didn't have the engagement ring with me when I proposed, I'm not planning to go ring-less when I'm married."
Ron's attention was totally focused on those reporters, whom he couldn't wait to lay his hands on. He nodded without thinking and replied, "Of course, what do you take me for?" With that said, Ron dashed away to deal with the reporters.
Harry paced around the front of the church impatiently like a caged lion. He kept muttering as he paced, "Where is Hermione? Where's Mr. Weasley? They should have been here a long time ago! What happened to them?"
Draco Malfoy stood up and asked loudly, "Hey Potter, how come Granger, who is never late, didn't appear? Did she change her mind at the last minute?"
Harry stopped dead on the track. What Malfoy said did make sense. What if Hermione decided to be a runaway bride? What if she met her true love just before she left her house? What if....
People attending the ceremony all became to murmur. Some even giggled and laughed. Wouldn't it be fun to see the Boy-Who-Lived embarrassed by his bride on his wedding day? A few girls were even brave enough to call out things like, "I love you, Harry! Marry me instead!"
Harry began to sweat. He had always been afraid that Hermione would drop out on the last minute. He even had dreams about her not showing up. Harry just couldn't believe that it really happened. He tried his best to maintain his outward calmness and stared at his watch. One hour and ten minutes. One hour and eleven minutes. One hour and twelve minutes....
Harry became more and more panicked as each minute passed. His back was already drenched in his own sweat. His hair, which had been smoothed down for the first time in his life, began to take its original form as his sweat washed away the special gel he put on that morning. One hour and twenty minutes. One hour and twenty-one minutes. Yet, Hermione still couldn't be found.
One hour and twenty-nine minutes. Harry was about to give up when his watch told him that Hermione was an hour and thirty minutes late. Harry turned his back on the people attending the wedding. He thought he would never see his bride again as he prepared to cancel the wedding with the church minister. Hermione isn't going to show up!
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A/N: Yes, this is the sequel to my fan fiction "A Comedy of Errors". It's also a combination of the challenge " A Very Crazy Wedding" from Liza Oceans Potter at the Portkey. I know that "A Comedy of Errors" was ridiculous and sometimes OOC. I'm sorry to admit that its sequel is no better. I hope you don't mind the ridicule in this story. After all, I've only written it for a laugh, no matter if you find it funny or not. Thanks for reading and please review. I'd love to hear your opinion of this story no matter if you think it's bad or good. Thank you.
Remember to read "A Comedy of Errors" first at Portkey.org or FictionAlley.org or FanFiction.net or HPFanFiction.com. Though it is not necessary to do so in order to understand, it'll help to clarify a few things.
¡@
A Wedding Full of Errors- The Errors of the Wedding
"I don't..." a heart broken Harry began, but was immediately interrupted by the loud voice of his Best Man's father.
"Out of the way, lad. The bride is coming. Fred and George, you two push these interfering reporters out of way. Use what ever means you need to get them out of our sight. Out of the way! The bride is coming! Ron, what are you hanging around the back for? Aren't you the Best Man? Get to the front with Harry. Make way for the bride!"
Another ripple of murmuring shifted through the crowd at this announcement. Sighs of relief as well as groans of disappointment could be heard from all corners.
Harry's back straightened up upon hearing the news. He felt his energy coming back to his body as he wiped off the sweat glistened on his forehead with his sleeves. He looked expectantly at the back door and prayed for Hermione to appear as soon as possible.
Ron appeared by Harry's side. "My dad said there was some kind of troubles on their way over here. Apparently a large flock of birds attacked them on the way and the car ran out of petals. They are all wet, because the car fell from the sky into a river when it stopped and dropped. Somehow, they managed to find their way over and walked here. Fancy that! No wonder they took so long. Anyway, you'll have to wait a little longer. My dad just ran here to tell you that Hermione would be here. They need some time to fix themselves up. You don't want Hermione to be drenched in water when you two marry, do you?"
Harry nearly fainted. "This is so unfair! I thought I had my share of disasters when I had a muddy-ringless proposal. Am I about to put up with a wet and ringless wedding too? Ron, are you sure you've got the rings?"
Ron felt his pocket. "Yeah, it's here."
"Let's pray for the rest of the wedding to go well then," prayed Harry.
Finally, the wedding march began to play. Ginny, the soaked Maid of Honor with no gloves, led the rest of the bridesmaids forward. They looked terrible. They looked as if they had just been to a bloody war in which had rained. Harry, Ron, Draco and the rest of the audiences winced at the sight.
Following behind the bridesmaids, were Mr. Granger and Hermione. Harry saw a wet-looking Mr. Granger and a barefooted Hermione, whose hair was still dripping water, walking down the aisle. Despite of the trail of water dripping from Hermione's dress, Harry found her even prettier than normal. Harry decided that she looked even better when she was wet.
Hermione smiled radiantly as her father gave Harry her hand. Harry looked lovingly at his wife-to-be as the two knelt before the minister, waiting to be joined.
(A/N: I don't know the exact procedure of the actual wedding, so I'll just skip all the way to the exchange of the vow part.)
The minister asked Harry, "We are gathered here this day to unite this man, Harry James Potter, and this woman, Hermione Elizabeth Granger, in the bonds of holy matrimony which is an honorable estate. Into this, these two now come to be joined. If anyone present can show just and legal cause why they may not be joined, let them speak now or forever hold their peace. Harry, will you have this woman as your lawful wedded wife, to live together in the estate of matrimony? Will you love her, honor her, comfort her, and keep her in sickness and in health; forsaking all others, be true to her as long as you both shall live?"
"I will," answered Harry happily.
The minister turned to Hermione. "Hermione, will you have this man as your lawful wedded husband, to live together in the estate of matrimony? Will you love him, honor him, comfort him, and keep him in sickness and in health; forsaking all others, be true to him as long as you both shall live?"
"I will," Hermione answered. Her face glowed with happiness.
"The wedding ring is the outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual bond which unites two loyal hearts in endless love. It is a seal of the vows Harry James Potter and Hermione Elizabeth Granger have made to one another. Bless O God these rings, that Hermione and Harry, who give them, and who wear them, may ever abide in thy peace. Living together in unity, love and happiness for the rest of their lives," the minister said. The minister then gave a look to the Best Man, Ron.
Ron, who had switched off as soon as the minister began the ceremony, didn't notice the pause and the look the minister gave him.
Harry and Hermione both looked up at Ron expectantly.
Finally, the minister sighed. "Mr. Weasley, may I ask you to bring forward the rings to be exchanged?"
"Oh, the rings!" Ron finally snapped out of his trance. "Of course! Here...." Ron began to fumble in his pockets. "I swear I put it here a while ago...."
Harry and Hermione looked at each other in alarm. Did that mean that they have to be married without rings too?
"Why did you give the rings to Ron?" hissed Hermione.
"It's the custom that the Best Man keeps the rings," answered Harry in a low voice, while Ron continued to look all over for the ring.
"Ron is going to mess this up. I'm sure of it!" whispered Hermione angrily. "I didn't have the ring for my engagement. Is the history going to repeat itself?"
Harry wasn't pleased either. "I told him to check for so many times too!"
Ron muttered as he fumbled wildly around. "Is it here? No.... Here? No.... It's not in the breast pocket, where can it be?"
The crowd down below began to whisper once more.
Mr. and Mrs. Granger, the Weasleys, the bridesmaids and the groomsmen eyed the fumbling Ron in terror. All of them crossed their fingers and hoped that the rings would turn up.
"Here it is!" cried Ron triumphantly. "I knew it's here somewhere.... Arragh!"
Harry and Hermione's relief was short lived as their best friend tripped over the stairs and fell. The rings slipped out of his hand and soared through the air. Everyone in the church stopped breathing as they stared at the pair of rings in the air. They soared separately to different directions and landed among the crowd.
A sudden uproar burst through the crowd. Everyone was suddenly on his or her feet, searching for the missing rings.
"I've got one!" an old man, who invited himself to the wedding, called in his shaking voice. "Here.... Ouch! Don't...."
The old man was immediately pushed over by the wave of people looking for the rings. Being sat on by hundreds of people, the old man lost the precious rings.
"I saw it!" screamed a three years old boy. "Why, it rolled by the bride's mother's feet...."
The wave of people changed direction instantly and hurled themselves at Mrs. Granger's feet. Poor Mrs. Granger, who had already lost her glasses, was forced to sit on her bottom as balls of fists fought over her daughter's rings.
"It's mine! I'm presenting it to the great Harry Potter!"
"No! I got it first! I'm presenting it to Mr. Harry Potter!"
It must have been the worst crowd fight ever in the history of Britain. The crowd made a lot of noises. Women screamed as men shouted with a few cries of babies on and off. The church had been destroyed. Sacred water had been splashed and benches had been smashed. Torn cloths lay about the room as the fight went on.
Harry pulled Hermione back to her feet. The nearly-married couple gaped at the mess in front of them, not knowing what to do. Their wedding rings must be down there somewhere with the crowd. However, there was nothing to be seen apart from legs and fists and dirt.
"Stop! Stop!" the minister called, in vain of trying to save his church from total destruction. "Stop it this instance! This church as a history of two hundred years! You are are destroying historical monuments! Stop! You are breaking the law!"
Somehow, both of the rings found their way to the front of the church and landed by Harry and Hermione's sides. Before the couple could pick up their much wanted possessions, the crowd had already darted towards them. Harry and Hermione could do nothing but to clung to each other tightly and hoped for the best.
Just as the crowd reached the groom and the bride, Albus Dumbledore stood up from the back of the church. He cast an extraordinarily strong spell and froze the whole crowd. This enchantment caused many hands reaching out for the rings to stop in the air just before any of them grabbed the rings.
"This," Dumbledore gestured around the church, "is outrageously ridiculous! Accio wedding rings!"
The pair of wedding rings flew obediently into Dumbledore's hand. With another wave of his wand, Dumbledore unfroze the church and the crowd landed upon the bride and the groom accidentally.
Dumbledore made his way to the front of the room. "All these ridicules must be stopped at once. Get off Harry and Hermione right now."
As the crowd picked themselves up clumsily from the ground and went back to their seats, which was reduced to splinters, Dumbledore gave the rings to the frightened Muggle minister. "Do continue."
"Ah, yes, of course," the minister's eyes still didn't leave his destroyed benches, which had been made two centuries ago. However, he managed to pull himself together and continued to conduct the ceremony. He held out the ring for the bride and gave it to Harry along with a piece of paper. "Please give this ring to your bride and read the words off the paper."
Harry straightened himself up. But, just as he did so, the zipper of his pants burst opened. Harry blushed deeply in embarrassment as he turned around and tried to zip his zipper up. Hermione immediately stepped in front of Harry in attempt to block him from the public view. However, for five minutes Harry battled with his pants but the fly remained open. Even Hermione's gracious smile couldn't distract the crowd for long.
The crowd was, of course, curious to know why the groom was silent for so long. Everyone craned his or her neck to see what was happening right at the front.
Ron walked up to his best friends and offered to help. "No thanks," refused Harry flatly. "I don't have my wand here today and Hermione had left hers outside. I know you haven't got yours with you. But you can try to find me some safety pins."
"Safety pins?" enquired Ron, puzzled.
"Pins, any pins!" Harry nearly screamed. Sometimes Harry wished Ron knew more about Muggle inventions.
Ron looked around the room. What is a pin? As he surveyed the room, his eyes landed upon McGonagall's bun behind her head. Those pointy things she stuck in her hair, they must be pins! "May I borrow some pins, Professor McGonagall?" asked Ron. "Harry needs some desperately."
In the mean time, Lavender, one of the bridesmaids, realized what happened and giggled. She whispered her amazing discovery into Parvarti's, another bridesmaid, ears. Soon, everyone in the church, whether they knew Harry personally or not, knew that the great Harry Potter had trouble zipping up his pants.
Ron returned with a dozen hair pins and left McGonagall with her hair down. "Here, Harry!"
"Thanks," sighed Harry wearily. "I think it's better if you find me a wand."
Finally, after a twenty minutes struggle, Harry turned back and took the ring and the paper from the minister.
"Hermione," mumbled Harry with his face still red from embarrassment and eyes still wide from shock, "I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed."
The minister also gave Hermione Harry's ring and a piece of paper. "Please give this ring to your groom and read the words off the paper."
Hermione took a deep breath in order to relax herself. "Harry, I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, With this ring, I thee wed."
"In as much as you have each pledged to the other your lifelong commitment, love and devotion, I now pronounce you husband and wife, in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder. Harry, You may kiss your bride!" announced the minister as he stood back and waited for his favorite part.
The couple stared into each other's eyes in disbelief. They were married! They were husband and wife at last! After all those disasters, were they really and truly married? Or was it only a joke? Somehow, the Potters couldn't bring themselves to believe that they were actually married.
"Kiss the bride! What are you waiting for? Kiss the bride!" chanted the crowd.
Gently, Harry pulled Hermione close and his lips found hers.
The extremely exhausted Muggle minister dropped onto his knees as the couple kissed. "Thank God!" he praised the Lord just as he fainted and lay motionless on the floor.
The crowd behind them cheered. Mr. and Mrs. Granger hugged each other and shaded tears of joy. Their little Hermione was married. An outrageous wedding it might have been, still she had been married and now belongs to the most famous wizard of the century for the rest of her life.
Harry and Hermione were too into each other's kiss and the rest of the room was too excited and therefore failed to notice what the Weasleys twins were up to. The twins sneaked behind the kissing couple with a basket between them. They nodded and pulled out a rainbow colored banister, which they threw towards the Potters. The banister surrounded Harry and Hermione and began to twirl about them.
The banister twirled faster and faster until all the colors mixed. The banister certainly caught everyone's total attention. Just as everyone's eyes were on the twirling banister, it exploded.
A large amount of confetti burst from the exploded banister. Along with the confetti, was the bride's banquet. It soared through the air for a second and finally landed in Ginny's arms. Draco smiled as Ginny blushed. Lavender, Parvarti and many other young girls present glared enviously at Ginny for her good fortune.
"The Amazing Disappearance Wedding Banister brought to you by Weasley's Wizard Weezes!" shouted Fred (or was it George) at the top of his voice. "Brilliant for wanting to escape from the unwanted attentions after the wedding ceremony! Buy now with a 20 percent discount in celebration of Harry Potter's wedding!"
Indeed, as the banister exploded, Harry and Hermione had disappeared.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Harry and Hermione suddenly found themselves in a hotel room.
"How did we get here?" Hermione asked.
Harry looked around the room and found an envelope addressed to them. He picked it up and began to read the content.
"Dear Mr. and Mrs. Potter,
We know that, being Potters, you would have to face a lot of unwanted attention from all over the
world. Therefore, we've designed a gift especially made to to suit you- The Amazing
Disappearance Wedding Banister. We threw it around you just as the groom kissed the bride and it
automatically take you to the honeymoon spot we've chosen for you- Hawaii. So now that the
problem of you being too famous had been sorted, do enjoy your new life as a married couple.
Yours res'prankfully,
Fred and George Weasley
(Weasley's Wizard Weezes)"
Harry put down the card and hugged Hermione tight. "It's from Fred and George. Aren't they sweet?"
Hermione turned away from Harry and pretended to be angry. "Look at what you've done. We can't even have a quiet, peaceful wedding without your fame causing us all these disasters! We engaged in mud and it had been a disaster. Just as I had predicted, we married in water and our wedding was a catastrophe! And it's all you and your fame's fault. Had you not been the Boy-Who-Lived, nothing would have turned out like this. My parents' house is now full of birds and more wedding presents we can ever open...."
"Aw... Hermione!" pleaded Harry with puppy eyes. "You know how much I hate my own fame. It's something I can't help."
"Humph!"
Harry grinned and picked Hermione up. "In that case, I'll just have to kiss you and make you feel better." Harry gave her a light kiss and began to carry her towards the bed.
Hermione struggled as Harry carried her towards the bed. "No you don't!"
"Uh huh," answered Harry as he threw her on the bed. "We'll worry about the wedding catastrophe and the birds at your parents house when we get back. It'll probably be sorted by then anyway. Meanwhile, may I help you out of your dirty wedding dress?"
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**__The End__**
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A/N: I've had so much fun writing this two chaptered wedding disaster. Most of the disasters were Liza Oceans Potter's idea. I used her ideas from her challenge. I'm glade that it turned out pretty well. Other disasters were made up by me, except the one about Harry's pants. I got that idea from my teacher's wedding two years ago. Her husband really had that accident and it was pretty funny. I can still remember her husband's face on the day as I wrote this chapter. So, it's partly dedicated to my teacher too. I hope you've enjoyed reading it. Thank you.