And a Bridge to Cross Over

1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. They aren't mine, even though I love them! The song Caramia is owned by the Indigo Girls.

Draco,

Blank notebook and a back pocket fade
You used to mock me
Sometimes I would cry
When I was home later
Cause you hurt my feelings
Why why why
You said write it down in your notebook
My wanna be Harriet the spy

Were you with us or against us? Did I ever know? Did I even want to? You gave me what you wanted. You said, “Do with this what you will.” I knew enough not to trust you; I knew to keep my distance. Knowing and doing are two different things.

And some say your genius
Is in your madness
Will you get better
And then will you leave us?

I knew not to expect promises of forever and love and babies and lifetimes. One thing can be said for you, you do not foster misinterpretations. Should I have told the Order the truth about us, the extent of the relationship? Maybe. I couldn't, though. It was mine. They would not have let it continue. Confidants and spies make strange bedfellows.


How you mixed with the darkness
At such a young age
Until in your chemistry
Science and violence
Turned silence to rage
Ah

I know why you turned to me the first time. I was everything you had never known. I was happiness, light, forgiveness, acceptance. Perhaps this lured you into a false sense of security. Perhaps you decided long ago that your life would consist of playing both sides.

Why are you dreaming this
One shoe off
And a bridge to cross over
And where is your taxi fare
Are you left by yourself
Or left by your lover

So it's your choice to make, as it always has been. I still know you cannot be trusted. I still know the power your father has over you. I think you can walk away. You say, “I made my choice by being born.”

For three nights straight now
I dream I kept both of my shoes
But I've forgotten my lines
And I've misplaced my cues
And there's a sea full of faces
And a show to go on
But I'm struck mute at entrance
With nothing to draw from

How do I explain to the Order that you could be giving us false information? It has been essential to our past successes. How can I explain that I have seen the lie flicker in your eyes the past few times we met. How can I tell them I know, but only because you won't look me in the eye when we make love.

There were the secrets
The big bang and the bigger joke
You seem to know all of them
That's why injustice makes you red with choke

You curse Harry. You curse the Order. You call them self- righteous and impossible and too strict with right and wrong. But you know that they have purpose that you never will. You never let yourself. You hate the world for the lot it has given you, yet you race along its path.

Yeah but you love like you're desperate
You don't know what love is
And I thought if there was one thing I could give you
One thing I could give you
Well maybe it was this

I was so naïve. I thought our love would change your world. I thought you would become a new man, the man you were meant to be.

The head on the bed board
The anguished repeat
The sweat of our sadness
And the twist of the sheets

Now we go through the motions. I still love you, but I know the choice you've made. You cry out my name, through the break of anguish. You think it's hopeless. Your life is not your own.

I don't want what's best for you
Where will I be when you've found it
You know I pray a lot about these bad feelings inside
I can't pray my way through or around it

I don't care about your family. I don't care about the only life you've ever known. I only care about myself, and you, together. I think about joining you there.

Hey
Why are you dreaming this
One shoe off
And a bridge to cross over
And where is your taxi fare
Are you left by yourself
Or left by your lover

It is the choice you have made. You have left us. I am dying inside. The urge to follow you is overwhelming. I have made my choice; I am coming with you.

For three nights straight now

(left by your lover)
You know I keep both of my shoes
(I've got bad feelings inside)
But I've forgotten my lines
(I can't pray through)
I've misplaced my cues
(I can't pray my way around it)
And there's a sea full of faces
And a show to go on
I'm struck mute at entrance
With nothing to draw from

Nothing to draw from

The only excuse I have is you.

-Ginny

Song lyrics- Caramia by Indigo Girls