Tough Times

padfoot_puppyeyes

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 5
Published: 27/05/2004
Last Updated: 06/11/2004
Status: paused

THIS IS THE SEQUEL TO DEPRESSION! yes, I've finally continued. James is no longer in a depression, he can keep going, but that doesn't mean the tough times are over. Please read and review, flames are welcome, I need someone to debate with! I'M BACK!

Chapters

1. The Discovery and the Kiss

2. Telling the Truth, Part One

3. Bella Donna

4. The Definition of

5. Blood, Water, and Giving In

6. AN

7. The Last Month

8. The Different Levels of Fear

9. So How Was Your Weekend?

1. The Discovery and the Kiss

AN- that was fun. I didn't have to blackmail you, yet I got all of you to review! I wasn't really going to leave all of you to figure the ending out for yourselves, where would the fun be in that? I already have my idea planned out. It was fun tormenting all of you though! (Cackles diabolically.) Now, I have to warn you all, while I will leave a fanfic alone no longer than two weeks, updating now depends on the beta, my priorities, (which now consist of grades, since my parents threw money into the mix,) and my responsibilities. It also depends on what mood my mom's in; she thinks I'm getting over obsessive! So yeah, that can be frustrating. Also, as some of you, (**cough**yekwah**) asked about my other story, Marauders Secret, I have to say, I had an idea, and now I lost it. So I'll try to work on it, but my muse visited me again last night with a brilliant idea for a throw-back-in-time fanfic, and how I could make it Lily and James and yet add Harry into the mix. And I have my novel to consider. But school will be over soon, so we'll see what I can pull out of the hat, and go from there. Anyways, here are my reviewers from Depression that I have to thank. Your reviews were short, but sweet and to the point. So thank you to-

Pokey- you reviewed me even though you didn't have to! Thank you so much! See, I feel all happy and warm inside! Like I said, I would never leave all of you like that! It was really fun though!

Lilyflower- you're as sweet about asking as your name! Of course, here's the sequel to Depression, just as you asked. The Will… well, that will be something to make this chapter interesting, along with a few other things…

quidditchfan1220- that really honors me that you want to beta. I mean, I know I couldn't, because of my bad grammar, and VERY short attention span, so thanks for the offer. I may take you up on it, I don't know as of yet who will be my beta. I might take turns with different people, because I don't want anyone feeling like they aren't good enough, (I know the feeling,) anyone's better at grammar than me, and I had a few offers. So thanks, I may just take you up on that offer, don't be surprised to see a chapter in your e-mail.

Sk8erWitch- no, like I said, I wouldn't do that to you! It's nice to hear from you though, got you to continue reviewing didn't it?

sarahmay- loved your review, you've got spunk! And I've always thought sporks was a funny word, so's tootles, that word drives me crazy, and I always use odd and arse `cause they get on my friends nerves! Hehe! I like sweet, just not too much fluff, and somehow all my better stuff always has sadness, I guess it's just the way I write. Loved all of the faces! It made me so happy! I liked talking to someone like you, can you review me on what you think about this, good or bad. It's the first time I've seen you, too, and you didn't insult me, in your own odd (funny word) way, you complemented me. So thanks!

JayaMioneDurron- HEY again! Hopefully you're reading the sequel, I got excited about reading your reviews, I always wanted to know what you and a few of my other favorites (people that have reviewed a few times without flaming me, and always have something funny to say) have to say about what I write. So please keep reading! And the letters would be what I called bittersweet, which is mostly the only type of sweet I write.

Anonymous- thanks, hopefully you can get an account on portkey, I'd like to hear from you more.

Lex- don't worry, I wouldn't do that to you. Well, here is the much-sought-after sequel.

Yekwah- Hey Jane! Did you get my e-mail? I tried, but I'm bad with these things…anyways, yeah it's summer here, almost, birthday three days ago, and Hehe I loved the chanting you did for a sequel! Hehe! You have no idea how much I appreciate your writing to me outside of my reviews! As I said, I love Evanescence and LOTR! And god are you lucky to go to Europe, I've never crossed the ocean, but when I travel I'm going to England! J.K. gives me the inspiration and encouragement to reach for my dreams no mater how far they are. I would repeat the last nine years in school just to meet her and that's saying something! (I may love her, but I HATE school, except reading and writing!) and Hehe, I'm warm! See yah soon?

Sweetkiwi456- yah, well, I'm too lazy to keep making James depressed, I don't have it in me, so I had to change the name, but the plot's similar. Great to hear your exams went well, I don't take mine till next year… high school…. Just the word scares me! but I'm not going down alone! Also, so love the fact you offered to be my beta, I'm not sure what I'll do yet, but I'll let you know. maybe I'll e-mail you soon! Anyways, great to hear from you, hopefully I'll hear from you again soon, and I wanted you to know I finally finished typing my book! so excited! Now I can focus on book two, and editing the first. (that's where my mom comes in. you got to love moms.) see yah!

Another anonymous- got the sequel down pat, relax. I' m not going anywhere.

Eschiva- hey again! Don't worry, I'm really not that mean, despite what my friends would say. Here it is, the demanded sequel! The secret keep stuff was a good idea, I'll try to use it!

PurplePastries1985- you're funny! (Haha) again, I'm not that mean, here's the sequel, (it was really fun teasing anyone who likes the stories though, threatening to end it!) did you really graduate last June? Wow… I have older reviews that like what I write! I uses it never sunk in before now… I would love for you to beta. I got a lot of offers, so I don't know what I'm doing yet, but I could really use the help, can I e-mail you sometime? You called my work brilliant… see you made me feel warm inside again. It's like when someone close gives you a touching gift, a reminder of something you share, only I don't even know you and you made me happy! Thank you!

London Lupin- I haven't seen you before, but I'm sure glad to see, (hear from) you now! It sounds like you really liked it! I'm really honored! You really loved it? (smiles!) love the name by the way, so many people though of cool names, not me though, no, I had to take the first thing I thought of…(sulk. Reads review and smiles again.) did you read Sweet Dreams? It's my only other semi-good story, I messed up on all the others… ah well.

Disclaimer- I disclaim. Disclaim. That's a funny word. (Hehe.)

James-

The next morning, I woke up earlier than anyone else except my alarm, my alarm being Sirius. “ Wake up Prongs!” (no one should naturally be that awake in the mornings. And wasn't he the last one to go to bed?)

“Padfoot, bloody hell!” I muttered, turning in the sheets so I could avoid the light from the curtains he was drawing back. “What's made you so cheerful?”

“Simple.” Sirius's smiling face was right in front of mine, that frightening up-to-no-good smile that said he wanted something from me. “Today, you pass your apparating test and take me places. Then you are granted permission to do pranks, I mean magic, outside of school. Then, you're taking us all out to breakfast to celebrate!”

“I am?”

“Uh huh. Your treat, too.” I stuffed the pillow over my head, now wide-awake, but determined to go back to sleep. A big furry black dog pulled at the sheets covering me, growling. “Prongs! Evans is coming!”

I can't believe I fell for it, but I was rather jumpy about the topic of Evans after kissing her on the cheek last night, so I fell out of bad and asked, “huh, where?” A moment later I realized my mistake. (my mistake being trusting Sirius.) Giving up, I shooed Padfoot out of the room and changed into something, (I think it was my old red shirt and worn jeans, but I couldn't have told you if you paid me, it was too early.) and wandered downstairs to floo to the ministry.

I didn't actually get to talk with the minister himself he was too busy. His secretary, (or one of them, I suppose, there were loads of people there in the secretary office.) actually interviewed me on the remaining rules and the proper uses of magic. He was stiff and cold and distant and everything I swore to myself I would never become. What happened in the interview, I honestly couldn't have told you either, due to the fact I had loads of sleep to catch up on and had only gotten a few hours last night. But I must have answered something correctly, because while the guy gave me a glare, he signed the form.

The apperation test wasn't that hard, because I'd actually learned how to flout the law and travel small distances about two years ago. I passed no problem, landing directly on the tape-x created for me. I noticed many of the people giving me cold glares, or questioning or sympathetic looks. When one of my father's partners and close friends looked at me strangely and asked how my dad was, I should have taken the hint. However, as Lily put it, I was sometimes, (she had said always,) incredibly thick. I should have known something was wrong. But I had no idea what was happening, and because of this thickness, I ignored the comment and flooed back home.

“Ready for breakfast, Prongs?” Sirius asked.

“Not if you're making it.” I replied, in no mood for cooking or eating burnt food. Michelle popped down, dressed nicely, in the seat next to mine.

“Aren't you taking us out to eat?” She asked, confusion written across her features. I threw a nasty glare at Sirius and replied,

“Dad would kill me.”

“Your dad would never know.” Sirius muttered, and I noted a tinge of bitterness in his words. I had no idea what he meant and gave him a look that said so until he replied, somewhat quickly, “Well, he hasn't been home yet, has he?” I sighed, but agreed that Sirius was right, and sent Michelle off to look for Evans, Sirius off to look for Peter and Remus, and went off myself to see if my hair would be semi-tamable.

It wasn't. I just kept running my hands through it, but no matter how hard I pressed it, it continued to stick off in all directions. So even as I arranged the floo network to take us to a local wizarding café, I was running my fingers through my hair in an attempt to tame it. For the first time in months, I think I cared how I looked.

Lily cared too, I could tell. Because she didn't tell me off when I ran my hands through it. It may have been wistful thinking, but I think she may have actually blushed. Michelle elbowed her, and Sirius elbowed me, and all in all it turned out to be a wonderful day.

It was the night that worried all of us. Remus transformed, and I really had no idea how we were going to keep this from them, them being Lily Evans, who figured everything out, and Michelle Murtha, who had been raised to fear werewolves and other half-breeds.

“You could try one of your excuses, the ones you used on us in your first year.” Peter suggested weakly, earning a glare from Sirius, and a sigh of exasperation from Remus and myself.

“Right. We all have sick grandmothers we need to take care of.” I cut in.

“Maybe if we had him go back to Hogwarts alone, he could do the transformation in the shack, and say something like one of his original lies?” Peter suggested again.

“ My, Wormtail, aren't you full of ideas tonight?” Sirius snapped back. We had always babied Moony during his `time of the month', whether he liked it or not. It often got on his nerves, (I think that may have been why Padfoot did it,) but this time I was the one to be stupidly loyal.

“ We haven't left Remus alone on a transformation since we found out about our animal selves. I don't plan to change that.” I replied bitterly. “We just need one of us to keep watch. Padfoot you're a dog, it won't look too odd seeing you in the house.” I offered, knowing it was a feeble plan but trying to sound confident.

It didn't work.

Lily-

“You like him.” Michelle made it sound like a fact she was stating rather than a question she was asking.

“That obvious?” No point in denying it now. Now that Michelle knew, the whole school would know by Monday. Michelle just smirked.

“To everyone but him.”

Somehow she had talked me into telling her, and right now I was deeply regretting it. in fact, I was almost regretting the fact that I had agreed to come with this group in the first place, not because I hadn't enjoyed it, but because it meant I had no stag to talk to in a time when he was most needed. Sticking me in a house with James for the weekend, (ignoring the others) had put me in a very uncomfortable position. I had wanted to use the time to get to understand him, but the more I learned the worse the knot of mysteries got.

Have you ever wanted to know something just because it was something you really didn't know anything about? It's a feeling I can't really explain, but it's quite similar to wanting something because you know you'll never have it. so you keep pining, striving, until you bore of it.

Only that bore of James hadn't kicked in yet. “I really don't know what to make of him. he's seemed better this weekend, but I can't put my finger on what it is about him I like…”

“Lily, has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?” Michelle asked, pulling on her nightclothes.

“Yeah. Nearly everyone, including you.”

“Has James ever complained?” I thought back, and realized that she was right, I liked to be able to talk about things without being interrupted. But that was only one of the reasons.

“He's so secretive.”

“He's a Marauder. Remus is the same.” Michelle said, preoccupied with digging her toothbrush from her trunk.

“Yeah, but I used to think I knew everything about him. he was simply a bi-headed git who thought of nothing but women and Quidditch, and always wanted what he couldn't have.” I sighed, thinking how much simpler things had seemed then.

“And now?” Michelle asked, though she was heading into the bathroom and out of earshot. I sighed, thinking through my response before saying

“And now he thinks.”

“Oh, their bath's like a pool! It a bloody spa! Lils, you have to see this!” Michelle called, running in. “their mirror lined with different body lotions, there's there puffy things to wash with, and…” I had thankfully learned as soon as I had met Michelle to tune her out, and that hadn't changed. I muttered something similar to

“That's nice.” And left the room in my nightgown. If I wanted to brush my teeth, I'd have to find another bathroom. Michelle was guaranteed to steam that one up.

There as a low growl coming from somewhere in the hall. It had to be from one of the rooms, but the hallway was lined with doors, and the noise was making me nervous. Unsure of what to think, I walked quickly down the corridor and ended up running.

I felt a weight on my back as whatever had been watching me sprung out from its hiding spot and onto my back. We tumbled into a ball and fell down the stairs in a tangle of fur, arms, legs and tail. That black, bear-like furry dog stood up a moment after we hit the bottom of the stairs and shook itself indignantly. “Well, it's your fault for attacking near the stairs.” I scolded primly, while in reality I was actually rather frightened. It was bigger than me when on it's hind paws, and something about it was off, felt not right. It was a dog, but almost too big to be one. Its soft fur was too clean, to well kept, and the eyes were different.

“You're an animagi.” I breathed in understanding, whoever it was wasn't one the list, I had to study it while McGonagall had trained me, and I knew no black dogs, or even dogs at all, on that list. “Who are you?”

You remember how I had earlier said something along the lines of “Now he thinks” referring to James Potter. I would like to amend that to, “He thinks at times, but at times can still be thick, and no amount of teaching or silence will ever change that. He chose that moment to come to the edge of the stairs and call down

“Padfoot? Are you…” He drifted off, eyes widening as he realized his mistake. But I had realized it too, and while it took a moment , I placed that nickname to the one Sirius had always gone by from the Marauders. It took a moment for me to remember to breathe as I pieced together a mystery, part of what made the Marauders so secretive.

“Padfoot…. A dog.” I looked down at the animal now licking it's injured side. “SIRIUS BLACK, TRANSFORM BACK THIS INSTANT!” I howled. It wasn't nearly as loud as the howl that came from upstairs.

“Crap, Wormtail, close the door!” James called, setting a rat I hadn't noticed perched on his shoulder on the floor. He looked down the hall behind him, then at me, as though afraid of my reaction, which he had every right to be.

At the time, however, I was still piecing it all together. It hadn't even occurred to me that my confident at school had been the guy I had talked about. Sirius appeared at my feet in an instant, looking afraid for his life, and still sitting like a dog might. “Wormtail…Peter! Peter Pettigrew! Are all of you…” I didn't bother finishing, as I had yet to figure out James's little nickname. “Prongs…” It didn't connect right away, I'm ashamed to admit. It took a little while, proving I could be thick at times too. Eventually, he came down carefully and said,

“Lily, you named me it. in a way, that is.”

With a sickening clarity, I remembered calling my stag Prongs after James. I hadn't realized at the time that he was James… I had called him it right after I had confessed all of my feelings to him. Swallowing hard, I asked the question anyone of you would have asked in a similar situation,

“What?”

They explained the best they could. They told me quickly about Remus, and his condition, and how they had decided to put their lives and futures on the line to become animagi. They explained how they entered the shack to keep him company, to keep him from hurting himself. And while they didn't mention how they waltzed around the grounds every full moon, even I was smart enough to put two and two together. The entire time, Pettigrew made sure Michelle was no where nearby, James controlled Lupin, and Sirius pulled me into the study to help me understand what this meant to all of the, particularly Remus.

Swallowing hard as I listened to him finish his brief explanation, I asked “Couldn't you have just become legal animagi?”

“Nope. You had to be seventeen. It wouldn't help Remus. If we anted him to keep himself alive and know we fully accept him, even if we just wanted to fully understand him, we had to become animals like him.” His voice was low and husky, and I had never seen him so…well…the pun had gotten old, but…serious.

“Two years…” I breathed. “You've been able to since fifth year?” It hadn't fully sunken in, I suppose, because I was repeating what he had already said, but I didn't understand.

“Uh huh.” Sirius replied sullenly. We both jumped as we heard a loud thump upstairs, where Remus had stayed to transform, and Sirius made to stand up. “Look, I can understand you're pissed a little. But you hated us until this year, why would we tell you? Besides, if you must, take it all out on James. It was his idea.” Some friend, huh? But I was proud of the idea, stupid though it was. It meant they were dedicated, (for the most part,) to their friend, dedicated enough to put their lives on the line.

That didn't mean I wasn't pissed at James for becoming the stag without saying anything, because I was pissed. Really pissed.

James came down minutes after Sirius left. He sat in the squishy armchair, and we fell into an awkward silence for a minute, him in fear and me trying to control myself before I exploded.

“You were the stag I named Prongs?” Please say no, please say no, please say no…please, in the name of all things holy…

“Yeah. I didn't know you were going to say something like that that night, I just…” his voice faded in uncertainty.

“You just?” I felt my anger rising.

“I just…you looked so upset. I just wanted to help.” He looked down at his hands, and I realized I wasn't really mad at him anymore, like I once would've been. There was a time when I would have said he was faking it, that he didn't really feel that bad. Now I knew the difference.

“ When you tell Michelle, could you make sure I'm out of the country, preferably across an ocean somewhere. Antarctica works… Moony doesn't really like all that cold, I don't think…” James smirked, but it was rather half-hearted. “and when he does find me, please place lilies on my grave.” I felt the corner of my mouth turn up, despite how badly I wanted to hit him. I remembered when he had claimed lilies where his favorite flower.

“So they're still your favorite flower?” I asked, smiling sardonically.

“They always have been.” James nodded reverently, mock solemn. “To be completely honest, I have to admit it wasn't your beauty or even your attitude that drew me to you at first…it was your name. That's how I noticed you.”

I hesitated in what I was about to say. Somehow it seemed like what I was about to ask was rather personal, and I didn't want to insult him. I just wanted…proof, I suppose, that he really was Prongs…I mean the stag. “Could you…you know…transform? I mean, like you did?”

An odd look crossed his face, confusion. “You aren't going to kill me?”

“Not yet.” He took a deep breath, let out a rather forced and nervous smile and stood up. Wiping his hands on his pants leg, he let out the breath. I watched in awe as his spine twisted, his hands curled, his jaw lengthened and he went to his knees. In no more than a few seconds he was a stag, shimmering brown mahogany coat and heavy antlers. Carefully, he walked up to me, almost shy. I reached out my hand and his rubbed against it like an animal would, making me giggle. Prongs nudged my hand, like a cat demanding attention, and I ran my head over his head and down his neck, as carefully as he had a moment ago.

Now that I knew he was James, it seemed so obvious. Only James would have known as soon as my little meetings with him were over, only James would be patient enough to listen, and only James had glasses that made marks on an animal such as these around the eyes. His coat, however, was perfectly in place, and he was graceful in this form as he was in his own, (he and Sirius almost had a dancer-like grace about them, it was Pettigrew who had the klutzy streak.) and his eyes shone with human intelligence.

He transformed into a human again, still looking me in the eye. Awkwardly, he brought his head closer than before. I felt his breath on my face, saw the uncertainty in his eyes, and went forward until our lips met.

It was like a shock. Nothing major happened. No fireworks, no singing… in fact, it was almost a timid, childish kiss, that only lasted a minute. We heard a crash above us, and someone holler, and James pulled away, still looking at me, then glancing upstairs.

“ I really ought to go see if Padfoots alright…” He said, looking stunned.

With that he turned away, racing up the stairs to check on his friend, leaving me behind him with so many different thoughts to sort out and keep me up the rest of the night in the study.

AN- IMPORTANT! Next chapter; will Lily keep the secret from Michelle, if so, how far will she go, and if not, how will Michelle, who was raised to fear half-breeds, react? What did James think of their kiss, and how do they act like nothing happened, when something so big did? Haha, I love torturing you! We'll see how the rest of the weekend goes…maybe James's father will come home…maybe not… maybe a few reviews will speed it up?

2. Telling the Truth, Part One

AN- hey, guys! I actually got reviews without demanding them again! It was so cool. There weren't as many as normal, but still… anyways, I'm not sure what has happened, I think I forgot to thank a few people last time, so if you didn't se your name as a thank you last time, I'm sorry I didn't thank you, I think you reviewed after I wrote the next chapter. Also, I'm updating this on the twenty-eighth, so if you review me later, I'll have to thank you next time. I want to get to the story, so yeah. I'm making this fast. Again. None of this happens to me. Don't start. I'm a happy, smart, kind, (if not slightly abnormal,) teenage girl.

Reviewers for Depression that I didn't have last time, (I owe you all an apology, hope this makes up for it.

Kokiri Fairy- wow, I love that name, where did it come from? Anyways, I haven't seen you before, but I'm glad to see you now, so glad you like it. And I owe you an apology. As I said before, I didn't check my new reviews before I posted, and I should have, and that's why you weren't on there last time. I'm really grateful you thought to review even though I didn't thank you in my last update, please keep going!

panda29- I owe you an apology too! I'm so sorry! Yeah, I know about the grammar, but I really am working on it, it just depends on how quickly I get the next chapter out. Thank you anyways. I'm trying to get a beta, I've had many offers, but when I update I don't want to have to wait, so it's difficult. Sorry.

Anonymous- thank you for the compliment, hopefully you'll continue reading to see this!

Tough Times reviews-

Sk8erWitch- Hey, my first reviewer for my new fic, and a familiar face at the same time! So nice to hear from you! Anyways, so glad you liked it that much, I was really worried I was losing my touch! But anyways, you re-boosted my confidence; I hope this meets your standards. It will if you like suspense. (Smiles evilly.)\

sarahmay- Hehe, I liked the stairs part too, but things will get so much funnier, you'll see I have it all planned out! And if it makes you feel special that I updated, imagine how special it makes me feel that you actually took the time to review! Thanks you so much! And god are you ever lucky to be graduating! I wish I were, I'm only in eighth grade however, and I still have all of high school to go. (Makes face,) but hey, thanks!

Lara- I'm so glad you broadened your horizons to l/j and that you chose my fic to start with! That makes me feel all fuzzy and warm! And yeah, they finally kissed, (I had planned on making it earlier, but I love pressure,) but how will they react? (Smiles evilly)

Kokiri Fairy- I owe you a sincere apology. Again, I' glad you liked it and continued to review me, it really keeps me going when people say they like what I write! Thanks and sorry!

Lex- See it did make me post faster! Hehe! I loved the short but sweet review! Thank you!

Sweetkiwi456- hey again, I've really gotten used to you, you know? I like, look for your reviews, and when I get them I tell people, and they all roll their eyes because I'm obsessive about fanfiction, but oh well, at least you like it! I'm grateful you'll agree about the thing I wrote you about in the e-mail, I'll email you soon! And I had though I was getting worse, I was actually worried what you would think, so thank you for the compliment, I took it to heart!

PurplePasties1985- hey again! Whenever someone says they're adding something I wrote to their favorites, I squeal! And I'm sorry about the whole sequel thing, I just got smart with you, just teasing, I didn't mean to offend! Hopefully I'll hear from you soon! I'll e-mail you some time you said I could. And I'm not sure what I'll do about the beta thing ye, but I'll let everyone know soon.

hermionegranger- you'll see what happens with his dad this chapter, I think. Just remember what Sirius saw when he stole the locket. (Smiles) glad you liked it, I've heard from you before too. See you soon, enjoy.

GreenEggsandHam- I do not like them Sam I am. No just kidding, I loved Dr. Seuss as a kid! Glad you liked Depression, and so glad you took the time to review. It's little things like that that keep me writing this story! Thanks!

panda29- both you and Kokiri Fairy are so sweet, did I thank you? Can I thank you enough for continuing to review? I don't think I can! I couldn't make the kiss cliché, that'd be too normal, and as I am consistently reminded, I'm not anything near normal. Wait till you see what James though of his lip lock with Lily. And I'm evil, but I'm so good at it! (Smiles. Looks demonic.)

alniyat- nice name, I like, I like! Hehe, if you are happy, I'm happy, because it means I get wonderful people like you who review me and make me write more, because you want to know what will happen next. It will get interesting!

Yekwah- Haha, I know I'm evil, but I'm so good at it! Hehe! And that's weird about the grill thing, but if it helps, every time I write my name, (you know,) I accidentally write James. It's really annoying! And I read your e-mail, I love finding Nemo, it's one of my favorite movies! “And I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine!” Hehe!

Disclaimer- I read somewhere that before a fanfic, you are supposed to give warnings. Warnings about what I don't know… kids, don't do drugs? Oh, they mean the story. Okay, um, kissing and drinking, that's about it. It just sounds more sophisticated to make it PG13. So there. That's all I have to say on that.

James-

Lily didn't end up telling Michelle anything. Like I've said before, I don't believe in keeping secrets from friends, but Lily had pointed out that it wasn't really her secret to tell, and I had to agree. Remus went back to Hogwarts so Pomfery could check him for injuries; I contemplated my kiss with Lily, and Lily? Well, she kept silent the rest of Sunday.

Our kiss hadn't been what had expected. Whenever I had dreamed of us kissing, it had been under the stars, when Lily admitted she was wrong and sorry for hating me all those years, and I forgave her and kissed her again. Never, in my strangest dreams, had it been in our dusty old study in the Potter Manor. And never had I thought that I would be the one scared away.

It may not have been everything I had imagined, but it had been something, all the same. I've kissed before, I mean I'm seventeen what do you expect, I wasn't going to wait around for Lily to come to her senses. But that kiss had almost made me wish I had waited for her. It was different from anything I'd every felt before. And it was only a second long. But something had passed between us. I just had no idea what, and this was what kept me thinking, the feeling that had made me run last night.

We left on the train around noon, to go back to Hogwarts. I think everyone but Michelle was happy to be back, I know I was. It gave me time for a butterbeer before classes began again and a chance to think things over.

Sirius had come with me, and we were silently walking down Hogsmade, side by side, me deep in thought and him, (patiently for Padfoot,) waiting for me to start talking.

Unfortunately, as we have seen prior to this, Sirius Black is a very impatient person, so for him, waiting patiently lasted all of fifteen minutes. He was silent until we were seated with our butterbeer in the Three Broomsticks before saying anything. When he did say something, it was short, showing that he didn't really care about his own words, just the reaction. “What happened?”

Well, I knew he wouldn't let it be, but I could play stupid. “Huh?”

“With Lily, dolt. What happened after I left, and before you came rushing in just in time to stop Moony from eating me? I mean, I appreciate it, but all the same, you were bright red. What happened?” Wow, Padfoot had kept quiet about something all night?

“Nothing.” I lied solemnly, trying to buy myself time. Padfoot would be the only person I have ever met that that never works on, probably because he has this other special ability that no one I have ever met has. Sirius Black has the ability to get under my skin. And he's good at it.

“Damn, Prongs, I hate it when you're upset.” Really good at it.

“I'm not upset.”

“Are too.” He acts like such a little kid sometimes.

“How can you tell?” I asked, amused. Looking at me thoughtfully over the rim of his mug, he replied,

“It's the one-word answers. That, and I can read you like a book.” I buried my head in my hands, running my fingers through my hair again, an old habit. (See, I don't do it just for attention!) “Did you kiss her?” My head shot up, and I felt my face color like it hasn't since… I don't know when.

“Yeah.”

“And she ran?”

“No. I did.”

“What!” He quieted it a deadly hiss when others gave him looks and leaned over the table, glowering at me. “You've been mooning after her since third or second year, Prongs. You've been all upset over her the past year. Bloody hell, I hear you call out to her in your sleep, or at least, I used to. Why did you run?”

Biting my lip, I tried to put something felt but never said into words. “Padfoot, we've been dating girls left and right since third year, right?” Sirius nodded, so I continued, encouraged. “And we've told girls since fifth year that they were special, that they were different, all of that on dates, right?” Sirius sighed, obviously annoyed, and asked,

“James do you have a point?”

“Yes, I'm getting to it. My point is, Lily…I'm not just saying it with her. She really is different, and if she left me, after I thought I had her… it'd actually hurt. So after I kissed her, I didn't honestly want to see her reaction.” Sirius just shook his head. Some things children, (and Padfoot was a child,) will never understand.

Remus-

Peter had just finished telling me the events of last night in excruciating detail. Sirius and James had left after I'd woken up, and reassured me they'd see me later, they just needed time to talk. To be honest, I was thanking god they had left, and wishing they could take Peter with them. Gods, sometimes they can get on my nerve, especially after a transformation.

“He kissed her last night, you know.” Peter stated thoughtfully, bringing me out of my daze. Peter hadn't mentioned this earlier, and I said as much.

“You didn't say so earlier.”

“I couldn't, Prongs was here.” He replied, still thoughtful. It was a very strange look on his face, seeing him think. After a while I asked,

“Who did Prongs kiss? Evans?” He'd better not me referring to Michele. No it had to be Evans, Michelle didn't know about my form yet.

“Yeah. She asked him to transform for her, and he did, and then they kissed.” Peter said. While I was mildly surprised, I didn't show it.

“Did she pull away?” I winced inwardly at the thought of James, and the mood he was liable to be in after Lily turning him down like that.

“No. Prongs did, thank god.” I mulled this thought over, wondering why he would run, what Lily had thought, if she was scared of me, and then why Peter sounded so relieved that James had run.

“You don't sound too upset about him being frightened away.” I stated calmly, watching Wormtail carefully for a reaction. Peter, to my great disappointment, just shrugged.

“I just don't know what he sees in that Mud-“ He changed his wording at the look on my face. I was very touchy after my transformation, and shifted under my blankets, ignoring the pain in my limbs and looking for something to argue about. “-Muggleborn. I mean, she doesn't like him, she's been flat out rude to Prongs in the past, and she's not even very pretty. He's had better. She's not anything special.”

“She's special to Prongs.” I spat, then said, “I'm sorry, Wormtail, you didn't deserve that. It's just, you know, I'm annoyed.” Peter nodded in understanding. There was more than one reason they used to call it my time of the month.

“But she's muggle born.” Peter argued.

“I'm half blood.” I reminded him. Peter's face darkened, as every other Marauder's did at the mention of my origins. It's incredible; they dislike my father and how he thinks of werewolves more than I do. I can understand dad's reaction, after I was bitten I had read through `werewolf rights', if they can be called that, and saw what we had done in our other forms. It was frightening, but I couldn't control myself anymore than any of the werewolves that had killed could. I could be the next one to murder. And it wouldn't matter to that family whether I were in my right mind or not.

“Yes, and we must remember that he's still afraid of you, and has been since you've been bitten.” Wormtail hissed. I nodded slowly, my head feeling heavy as I remembered the look of horror on my fathers face when he saw my Hogwarts letter. It had been years ago, but the memory would forever be etched into my mind, the look of betrayal.

“You were afraid to touch me for a month after you found out.” I scolded him, determined to defend my father. Peter flushed.

“Yes, but that was different. I didn't understand.” Peter argued. It gave me perfect reason to argue.

“Neither does he.” That was the end of it, and both of us knew it. I shrunk down under the hospital sheets, drained as always from the transformation. Peter sat forward in his visitors seat and asked,

“Are you going to tell Michelle?”

“I'll have to, wont I?” I replied, more tired than ever. The secret was so hard to keep it'd have to be out eventually. I just wasn't too sure what I could say that wouldn't scare her away from me.

Sirius-

Well, if you hadn't seen it coming, I must agree with what James said later about us. We were incredibly thick. It was just our luck, something we should have seen coming, or at least, something I should have seen coming, for a while now.

All right, I'll get to the point. We were just walking towards Honeydukes to get back to school when we heard shouting coming from somewhere near by. Being the curious idiots that we are, (I mean, were) both James and myself had to see what was happening. Most people had by now gone to The Three Broomsticks, and we had to play the heroes and make sure everyone was all right.

I really wish we hadn't. I really, really wish we hadn't. As we turned the corner wordlessly we saw two people being thrown into the street, laughing all the way. The man I recognized as the bartender at the Hog's Head, (don't ask how I know these things. You really have to know about my parents, the Blacks. That should say enough for you,) yelling at the two shadowy figures,

“OUT! And stay out! I hereby ban you from my pub.”

“Nice working with you Dung.” I felt horror, pure horror, as I realized who it was. Unfortunately, Prongs realized who it was at the same time.

“Dad?”

The laughing abruptly stopped, and Mr. Potter stood up staggering slightly. What was there to say about Mr. Potter and his appearance at that moment? Not very much. His tee shirt was stained, his hair was wild and tangled and his knees of his black jeans were wet and stained as bad as the shirt.

There was really nothing I could say that would've made James feel better. He just…blew up. There are no better words for it. It was much like all of the times Evans had blown up on him, or at the beginning of the year when he actually blew up on Evans. His face turned red, as he stalked forward and said,

“Is this where you've been all weekend? Getting wasted? Why am I not surprised?” He seemed at a loss for words after that. Mundungus Fletcher, (don't ask how I know Dung either, remember my family,) had by now high-tailed it out of there, and I was left to watch James just stand there critically eyeing his father. “Sometimes I wonder who the adult is.” He growled.

“Prongs…” I started, wondering what I could say to make him feel a bit better about the situation. There was nothing that would stop his disgust.

“Padfoot, do me a favor. I don't trust him to apperate in this state. Bloody hell, I barely expect him to walk. Get him a room in one of the local inns that will accept him like this.” I watched James walk away mournfully and did as he had asked me to, swearing on my honor as a Marauders, though that isn't really saying much, that I would pull James out of this one quicker than I had the last time and get myself a girlfriend before the end of the year. Despite what you may believe, my world does not revolve around James Potter.

Michelle-

As I walked into the Hospital Wing, I watched Remus sit up in the white sheets. “Hospital wing again? Why don't you have your own bed by now?” I joked as I plopped down next to him on the edge of the mattress. I think he said something along the lines of

“I do.” Before I heard him say “we really need to talk.”

“About what?” I asked, watching him carefully. I have never, in my time knowing Remus Lupin and scoffing at the Marauders, seen him so uncomfortable, and that was saying something as he had been fairly uncomfortable asking me out, extremely uncomfortable watching the others pick on Snivellus, and almost scared enough to wet his pants when he was being sorted.

He was bruised and scratched, and looked like something had attacked him last night rather than what he had said. He had said, earlier that he hadn't felt well. I will never forget what he said next, because it changed my views on many things forever.

“It's about what happened last night.”

AN- So, Hehe I left you on a cliffy! (Giggles!) I love leaving people on cliffies, because do you know what that means? It means I can demand reviews to make me update faster, and I'll have more time to think up the next chapter. I'm sorry for any grammatical errors, I've been busy, and a beta wasn't used this time, sorry, I will get to anyone who wants to be my beta later, when I'm half-awake. G'night, and fourteen reviews would be nice! Really nice. Two or three days nice!

3. Bella Donna

AN- hey guys, I'm so sorry this took so long! It was a whole bunch of things, my evil muse, my beta, (it's not her fault, she's in school,) and my second novel, which I've started typing this week. So I'm sorry for the delay, but happy for the reviews it brought in! No one even flamed me! Anyways, I swore to myself I would not tarnish the upcoming chapter with a long author's note, so here it goes.

Warnings- FLUFF AHEAD

Yekwah- see I would never blame you! I'm flattered about what you said quote; `I actually took it to school so I could get it done for you'. Anyways, I assumed, perhaps wrongly, that HOGSMEADE was the only mistake, and apologize for blemishing your work if there was more. And I left you with that cliffy with only my best interests at heart, but I can't apologize, because, well, it worked, didn't it? (Smirks.) Anyways, I'll email you soon! Too bad about being booted from the computer like that, it sucks, doesn't it? And please do write a fanfic and post soon, I really want to read something you've written! Still open if you need any questions answered, I'll do my best for you.

Jess- I'm so glad you've lied both of them s far, I really wasn't sure about the people that weren't reviewing, whether they just didn't like it or…well, anyways, I'm really glad you liked it!

GreenEggsandHam- this enough l/j for you? (Smiles, then winces. Too much fluff!) Sorry if that sounded a bit rude, but I was just joking!

Sweetkiwi456- I'm so glad I'm forgiven, but that doesn't change the fact that I am indeed an evil little minx. (I love that word!) Glad you liked that chapter, but this on has a lot more fluff and Lily's POV, hope you enjoy! Good luck in physics, I'm laughing because I don't have it! (Evil little minx! *sing song voice*)

alniyat- I know I'm evil; I've been labeled the evil little minx. And I love it! Hehe! And this one is another cliffhanger! I'm really sorry this took so long, I hope you forgive me, cause it wasn't my entire fault. And I'll have you know, I'm already working on the next chapter. Forgive me!

JayaMioneDurron- All I have to say towards the exam comment is Haha, on the account that I don't have any exams, yet. I'm a freshman next year! Hehe! Thank you for sticking to me! I really… it touches me. Thank you. And about your second review, it's really all right I guess it makes us even. I messed your name up, and you made a mistake on mine! In this chapter… Lily's reaction to James's' kiss, Michelle's reaction to the truth about her boyfriend, but no more Mr. Potter in this one. Anyways, here it goes, please let me know what you think.

SoCoChick15- nice to hear from you, have I heard your name before? Thanks for the compliment, at first I really wasn't sure if people would read Depression and want a sequel, but that just proves me wrong. Thank you.

Anonymous- I know. I hate that rule. Why ten words? It didn't used to be like that. It used to be you could just put a smiley. But your review made me laugh. I like root beer.

Anonymous- do you really think it's like J.K. writing it? I seriously got teary at the compliment, she's my idol, and…now I'm probably scaring you, but you just gave me a reason to keep hoping that one day my book will be as good as hers. I can keep hoping, right? Right?

yamainu- I'm really honored, it makes me feel good to know that you took the time to review me when you so rarely do. And to be honest, I do believe the Ron and Hermione, and I'm not sure about Ginny and Harry. But this site is so often read, and I don't really write Harry/Hermione, just James/Lily, and if I do have Harry/Hermione, it has Hermione going out with Ron at some point. I love that name too, Japanese?

Anonymous- thanks; I can't write a story unless it has more than one point of view. Michelle Murtha is a bad, stupid, mean name, (take that, Prongs!)

Lily-

By breakfast the next day, half of the school knew about James and his father, and they were busy telling the half that didn't know. If this had happened to anyone else, people would send them pitying glances but not give it a second thought. This happened, however, to James Potter, and when people found out something this big about him, it was around the school in moments, used by others to his advantage or against him, and made public information.

In a situation like this before would've said he deserved it, (he shouldn't have been out of the castle to begin with, but when Dumbledore found out what had happened, he had covered it up for James, saying that because of his mother's recent death, the Headmaster had given James permission to visit Hogsmade.) but now, I only felt pity for him. The look on his face said quite plainly when he walked into breakfast that he would rather be anywhere but there.

As he had been absent from meals for so long, the Marauders usual spot had been taken by a group of seventh years that didn't look like they were going to move. It was apparent they were aiming to give James a hard time, so pushing aside the thoughts of that kiss; I called them over to sit down.

The room went deadly quiet. Everyone, even the Slytherins, seemed to be wondering what would happen next, whether I would humiliate him, or hurt him, or simply ignore him. But no one had expected me to call him over to sit.

Eventually the chatter came back into the room, and while eyes still nervously darted back and forth to us, the Marauders, Michelle and I managed a decent conversation. Afterwards, we all walked up the steps to our respective classes, no one at all upset.

Don't I wish?

The truth of the matter was, I was alone at breakfast because Michelle hadn't come back from wherever she was. And that's not even where this part of the story begins, but rather were it comes closer to the end. It's the night that takes a while to tell.

We had spent what could be called the beginning of last night, Remus and I, in the Marauder's rooms (they were messy, but secretive, and the common room was too risky,) looking at that map they had, trying to find her. Somehow, she never showed up.

Both of us agreed that she couldn't have left the school grounds, Michelle wasn't that brave, but she hadn't taken to the news of what Remus was so kindly. She had run the moment after he had spoken, not even giving him a chance to explain, and leaving Lily to try to reassure him that one day it would all work out.

Sirius had asked if we had seen James, and I had checked the map to see his `dot' the mark with his name, sitting by the edge of the lake. He was waiting for me to come and listen, and I knew it. Sirius gave us a short description of what had happened to explain his bad mood, and asked why I was in the boy's dorm, which had made Remus start shaking all over again.

I left Remus and Sirius after Peter came in, when Remus had to explain what had happened all over again. I only ran into the caretaker on my way down, and while he had always disliked James, (I suppose I would too, if I had to clean up the mess his pranks make,) he had always admired me. I just told him I was doing my rounds, simple as that, and he nodded and left me to make my way silently out the large wooden double doors and down the sloping grassy lawn towards James had the lake.

James was a human for the first time I had seen him at the lake at night in our spot, more human than normal. He had no energy, and had a drained and tired look on his face, almost like too much had happened, and I knew that whatever façade he put on tomorrow would portray him as happy and excited, a mischievous prankster, but he'd be feeling like this for a while.

It didn't take words. Sometimes I believe in silent communication, in expressions, in motions, the words the eyes and face said. All it took was his tears to get me upset again. I didn't know how to comfort him, to be honest, I had never babysat, seeing as I was away at Hogwarts at the age of eleven, an no one would trust their kid to another kid like that, so I had never worked with someone besides my closet friends crying, and when they had I had always let them cry on my shoulder, or cry into me. But after that kiss, I wasn't too sure how to act around James.

“I don't understand why he does this, flower.” He was using his childish nickname, but he was just so sad I couldn't tell him off for it.

After a thoughtful silence I replied, “Maybe he uses it as his escape.” James just gave me a confused and mildly annoyed face, so I continued. “You know, mine's reading a book, yours may be…quidditch? Something you do that you enjoy, something that takes your mind off of everything going on around you. You enjoy flying for the same reason I enjoy books. Both seem to take away any worry.”

James gave it a good deal of thought, and it seemed like we were about to talk about him and his problems for once before he looked at me, still serious, and asked, “Lily, why don't you like flying?”

The change in the topic caught me unprepared, and all I could do was ask “What?” James gave me a searching look.

“Well, I mean, it'd make sense if you were afraid of heights that you wouldn't like flying. But you never even went to the quidditch games, or watched us practice with the rest of the class before the cup, or any of that. So it's not just that you are afraid of heights.” I bit my lip. This was really a topic I didn't want to get into. I noticed his fingers, and realized they were resting on the oak handle of the broom, his new model broom. How had I not noticed it before?

You were too busy staring at James. This voice wasn't Sirius's it sounded more like my own. And it was doing a good job of taunting me. Ignoring it, I answered James's question,

“I guess I just never really felt very comfortable on one of those things. You could slide down, or off at any moment, and it never really appealed to me, having wood shoved up my arse. I just never took to it.”

“You wouldn't slide off, you know.” James pushed, studying my face. I kept my eyes down, until my face was hot and I had to look up. “Besides, we have to get back inside. This was how I came out.”

“You can fly back up. I'll walk.” I replied, quite a bit more coolly than I felt. But James was becoming his old self a little more every day, and the James Potter I had hated was determined to a fault.

“Nope. You aren't getting away that easily.” He stood, brushing himself off, the Thunder200 clutched in his right hand. “Come on. This way will be quicker, and besides, don't you owe me?” Damn teenage hormones. He was offering me a moonlit ride on a clear, warm night, and at the moment he didn't look too bad. Besides, I did owe him…

How many times are you going to use that excuse? That little nasty voice asked. Pushing it aside again, I clambered on. James wrapped his arms around my waist and lightly pushed off of the ground, gently wrapping his arms around me while I held tightly onto the pole of wood under me.

I could understand at that moment how James could enjoy it. You see, he was steering, (backseat driving,) and it glided along naturally, as it always did under his hands. The stars were glittering, and the moon, no longer full but very close, gave the grounds and the castle underneath us a glow, bathing them in moonlight. It was simply beautiful.

James was breathing in my ear, on the back of my neck. The effect that alone was having on me was frightening, and I did the stupidest thing I could have. I shivered. “There's no way you're cold.” James scolded lightly, whispering into my ear.

Trying to do anything to keep myself from admitting I wasn't, I looked down. “James, aren't we going a bit higher than we need to be? We're almost above the astronomy tower.” I felt rather than saw his smile, but I wanted to see it too, and with a questioning look on my face I turned around.

His wolfish grin and messy black hair made the question die right on my lips. His hazel eyes glimmered as he looked back at me, face close. “I'll be quick, I promise. I just thought you might want to see this, it's a clear night, and one of the best views of Hogwarts appears to be empty. Usually there's couples up here, but the exams will be coming and it's a Sunday night.” I tensed when he pointed out that it was the night before classes began again, but he persisted. “Please, Lily? Please?”

I don't know who has that bloody puppy look mastered better, him or that friend of his, and Sirius, I had recently learned, was a puppy, at least every full moon. So I gave in, and let him get off on the stone roof, then help me off, pulling me close. A lot closer than I should have been comfortable with.

He had been the one to run last time, if I remembered correctly, and I wasn't about to get him distant again, not when I had a choice between him rushing off leaving me on the roof of the Astronomy tower. So I just watched him, waiting for James to move or us to leave. He looked out over the grounds, and said,

“See Hogsmeade just over there? They've already pretty much finished rebuilding since that attack. And if you look over there, Hagrid's lights are on. You know him, right?” I nodded, still watching Hogsmade where he had pointed.

:”James, how did you get into Hogsmade? I mean, without anyone seeing you leave?” I asked, thinking it through. They had been sneaking to Hogsmade for a while I knew, since about second year, and bringing back sweets for everyone after won quidditch games, for the parties. While they could have walked all that way, they had only been animagus's since last year and it would take quite a while to walk that distance and carry all of that stuff back. I turned back to James to see that his smile had widened.

“That, dear flower, id another one of the Marauder's secrets. Now you understand why we have so many. Some of them aren't mine to tell.” He had called me that stupid nickname again, and this time he was smiling, so I had the mind to yell at him.

“James Potter, that's the second time tonight you've called me flower! I'm not a flower just because my name is.” I snapped. James smiled wider.

“I could call you Bella Donna. It was one of the reasons I liked you.” He whispered. “Come on, it's getting late. Let's get back.” He climbed back onto the waiting broom, and left room for me on in front of him. Enjoying the wind in my hair, I thought things through again, for what seemed like the millionth time that night, until James whispered in my ear.

“Your dorm is right through that window.” I noticed the window was open. The Marauder's light was on. Seeming to read my thoughts, James said, “Relax you're too tired. I'll help them look for Michelle, we'll have her back soon, promise.” He took my hand to help me off, but I didn't want off. He looked like he thought I had yet to realize that he meant for me to get off for the night, because then he said, “Good night, Bella Donna.”

“I knew what flower meant, James Potter. If this is your new nickname for me, at least tell me what it means.” I demanded.

James looked surprised. “Weren't you paying attention to Herbology on Wednesday?” He asked. No, I hadn't been. I'd been staring at him, but I'd rather jump off of the astronomy tower than say so aloud. I just shook my head, and he explained. “It means poison flower. Sweet Dreams.”

He kissed me a little harder, a little bit longer than last time. It was difficult on a broom like we were, but I turned right around and kissed him back. We pulled apart, and with a smile James flew away, and I climbed into my room, never noticing the three other Marauders, one smiling and clapping the others on the back, one scowling, and one shaking his head, but laughing. All three gits were hanging out the window to watch the show.

Remus-

Sirius was wiping the tears from his face by the time James entered, a guarded look on his face. Even I was shaking from suppressed mirth, because while that guarded look normally meant that something big had happened in his life, and it was most likely something bad, this time in laughed instead of worrying. Sure, something big had happened to James. But to the great amusement of the Marauders, it had been something good.

“What?” James asked carefully, making Sirius laugh harder, which was saying a lot seeing as he was already almost doubled over. I just shook my head.

“Good night, Bella Donna? Wow, James I didn't know you were such a romantic!” I smirked at the look of horror on James face. By now even Peter was laughing.

“Shit. All of you heard that?” James exclaimed. He rarely cussed, because of how honorably his parents had raised him, but when he did, it usually made us grave. Sirius, who had finally regained his breath, had done so just as James had said that, and somehow he ended up clutching onto me for support.

“Yes, James, we all heard that.” I paused, and just as I had thought would be happening, I heard squealing in the room next to ours. Loud squealing girls. “Sounds like everyone in the next room did as well. They're all up waiting for Michelle and Lily.”

James sat down hard on the bed with a thud, went to lying down, then asked, “Do we have any idea where Michelle's at?”

“None.” I replied, my mood dropping drastically. “She ran off in tears.”

James squeezed my shoulder hard in reassurance and said, “Michelle's a sensible girl for the most part…” He made a face, as though deep in thought, then said, “Well, okay, not the brightest, but still, she has Lily to help get her through. She depends on Lily. Lily will explain it all to her.”

“She has every reason to act like this!” I argued. “I'm a monster every full moon. I've lied to her all year, I've asked her to keep a deadly secret, and she's grown up fearing creatures like us.” James just shook his head.

“Remus, you are Remus. Moony is part of who you are, and a part that you can change no more than your heritage. It makes you quiet it makes you controlled, and gives you and us a sense of what the half-breeds think like. We know now that you aren't half human because you have a half a brain. It's purely the part animal, and if you look at it that way, all of us are monsters once a month too.”

James switched from inspirational prep-talk mode, like he does in the common room after a quidditch game, to take-charge mode, much like he commonly does whilst pulling a prank. “All right, we'll have to do this the difficult way. We'll have to think of all the places you can stay while avoiding the map. Are there any places we forgot to do the tracking spell? And passages or rooms we've discovered since the Marauder's map?”

“We have all of the classrooms. All of the passages out of the school that we know of, and somehow I doubt she knows of any we don't. But rooms…” Sirius faded away. “There's the kitchens,” (Notice that Harry never mentioned the kitchens on the map in third year? This is why.) “And that little outside area we discovered on the fourth floor, the little area with the balcony… and that room I still have to check out fully, the one that gives you whatever you want.” Of course. The house elves had told us about the room of requirement this year in the kitchens. If you desired a place where no one could find you, even the map probably wouldn't be able to protect you. But I didn't say this aloud. If she really wanted time where no one could find her, I should at least give it to her. It was understandable.

“Guys, let's look for Michelle tomorrow. If she wanted to talk to me, she'd come to me. I'm exhausted, always am after a transformation, and you don't look to up to sneaking out at this early hour. We'll go tomorrow.” AS soon as I said it, I noticed relief in Prongs and Padfoot's faces. They cared, but there was always a limit. Even I was tired. Where was Wormtail? Asleep in his bunk, shaking.

Breakfast that morning was interesting, first and foremost being that everyone in there quieted as soon as James stepped in. second was that James's `Bella Donna' beckoned us over reluctantly to sit next to her, and I swear everyone's face held shock. Later I'd have to hit Sirius up for that money I put on James getting Lily in the end. I had made the bet in fifth year, pay-up time. Looked like many others were doing the same, figuring out from the looks the two kept sending each other across the table that they were now…something. What they were, well, I'm not sure even they knew. But they were something interesting to watch that was for sure.

I slipped out of my spot, hardly hungry. If this was how James had been feeling the last few months, I could really feel pity for him, because it was a numb, sad feeling. It felt as if everything inside of you had been cleared out.

I excused myself and walked up the steps to the corridor leading to the room of requirement. It would be a long walk, but James had known what was on my mind. I had company. “Git. You can't do this alone, and both of us know that Sirius Black would make matters worse and Peter wouldn't have the courage to come.” James said calmly, walking down the hall, keeping pace with me.

“I know. You don't have to come, you looked pretty smug in there near Lily.” I really wanted him to follow, and we both knew he would.

“Come off it. We both knew I'd stay. I'll just wait outside the room.” He muttered under his breath, “You two had better come to an agreement though, making me miss breakfast and Lily.”

“Your two favorite things.” I joked readily. James rolled his eyes, but smiled when I said, “You know you walked right into that one, right?”

He sighed and quieted for a moment, then tried to comfort me by saying, “Moony, you were always the smart one. You have to realize, she grew up being told legends of how werewolves killed. She was taught the signs of a werewolf in case one attacked. I mean, to find out someone you know is one…well, it just changes so much.” I realized he had grown up fearing werewolves too, until he'd met me, and seen through the secrets I kept. James was always good at that.

“I know.” I shot back. “I'm sorry, I'm just a little nervous. Anyways, what about what happened with you and Lily last night.” If I wanted to change the topic, it had to be something James would want to talk about.

James blushed. James Potter actually blushed. In all the time I'd known him, I don't think I've every seen him so embarrassed. “I just offered her a ride back up… because we were talking by the lake, and-“

“What were you talking about?”

“Dad. Life. Hobbies, good and bad. I showed her the astronomy tower view.” That made me smile. James had been taking his girlfriends to that site since…well, since he'd gotten girlfriends.

“And I'm to assume because of this that there was a lot more kissing involved?” I asked, which made James smile.

“Nope. But that's where I decided she was Bella Donna. You know, poison flower, because of her sharp words.” I nodded, encouraging him to go on, and still amazed that he had been so, careful. He must really not want to screw up his chances.

“And the kiss?” I asked. We were nearing the tapestry of that oaf getting clubbed by the ballerina trolls, meaning I was almost there.

“I didn't start that. At least, I don't think I did…but she didn't seem to hate me too much this morning.” James smiled, and, just to reassure myself that Lily wouldn't be another of his date-and-ditch girlfriends, I said,

:”James, I think it's wonderful that you finally have Lily, but if you hurt her, so help me god, there will be one less Marauder.” Lily and I had gotten somewhat close when we had been prefects, and I didn't want to see her as hung up over James as any of the other girls he's been with. But James seemed disgusted with the thought. He had been so jealous of me when I had become friends with Lily, and I realized maybe it was the wrong thing to say. James slowed down and scratched the back of his neck in confusion.

“Are you saying you'd quit, Moony?” He asked. Clueless, absolutely clueless.

“No, I'm saying you would have to.” I replied, and then comprehension dawned on him.

“Go talk to your girlfriend, mutt.” James said, punching me lightly on the shoulder. Which I intended to do. I walked back and forth, ironically thinking, I need a room where I can find Michelle. Just as a way to comfort her. I need to find Michelle Murtha… the door appeared, and with a last look in James's direction, I went slowly inside.

She was shaking, but otherwise silent. There was a table with a little food in front of her, and a bed she had probably slept in the night prior. It was a good thing she knew when she had to eat and sleep. At least one of us did.

“So you figured it out. How?” She paused a minute before saying, “Oh, that bloody map, I'd forgotten. You could have thought to check it earlier.”

“I thought you'd want some time alone.” I replied quietly. My words seemed to echo against the walls and fill in the silence. “You know, it doesn't make me a different person. I mean I've been like this since I was four. The Marauders only know because they figured it out, the same thing with Lily. You're the only person I've ever actually told. But I can control myself. It's not like I'm always a danger to be around.”

Michelle sat in silence before saying, “You lied to me for so long, I should have figured it out. All about your mom being sick and how you got pale every full moon…” she paused. “Remus, I'm not going to tell anyone if that's what you're afraid of. I wont breathe a word of it, because that's betraying your trust, and I'd be as guilty as you when it comes to the lying part. I know you can control yourself when you aren't in your…wolf form. But…I just can't kiss a person that gets all hairy once a month, with the possibility of killing someone.” It made sense. I hadn't even expected her to forgive me, and keeping it a secret was more than I could ask for, because I had put her in danger by having her and Lily inside the same house as me on the night of the transformation. Still, her words actually felt like they stabbed me.

But I'd become accustomed to hiding my emotions over the years, and I kept my face blank as I asked what I had to as a Marauder, even if it made her think the Marauders were first. Because the truth was, they always probably would be. “And the animagus secret? Because even Dumbledore doesn't know about that.”

“Do they ever plan to tell?” She squeaked.

“Yes. Not right away, not all of us are even of age. But eventually, yes, they're going to register. The thing is, they don't want anyone to know about their earlier transformations, they were illegal until becoming of age. They'd get locked up for it. But they just wanted to help…”

Michelle nodded, looking tired, and said, “It's fine, I'm not going to say anything, but…you really ought to stop putting the Marauders before everything else in your life. That was dangerous, what you agreed to, caving in to your friends because they wanted you to spend the weekend with us. I don't know what Dumbledore was thinking, letting me and Lily and them go with you.” She sighed. “And keeping a secret as big as that is as bad as lying. You did both.”

She really knew how to use words to make them eat at your conscience, like Lily. She must have gotten it from her, but nevertheless, I had gotten the promises I had needed, and there was nothing more I could do to fix the relationship between us. She would just have to figure things out for herself. “Right then. I have classes today, but you should go to the infirmary and tell them your not feeling well if you want a reliable excuse to get out of classes. Tell Pomfery you know my secret, and you need a pepper-up potion.”

Michelle seemed shocked. “Pomfery knows?”

“All of the teachers do. There was no other way to explain my absences.”

“And she still helps you after every transformation?” Michelle asked, looking up, her hazel eyes red-rimmed. I nodded, silent. Her eyes seemed caught in mine for a moment, and then she shook her head. “Go to class. Tell Lily I'll… tell her I'll be there in a moment. Oh, I can imagine she was rather worried about me…”

“Her and the Marauders were looking for you all night, I wouldn't get on her bad side today, you know how a sleep-deprived red-head can be.” Michelle gave a forced smile and nodded. I stood and walked out of the room, turning to the wall where James sat waiting for me.

“Dumbles is waiting for you.” He said quietly.

“Oh.” Dumbles was his nickname for Dumbledore, but what would the headmaster want from me? “Well, then, I suppose I'll be a little late for classes, but I'll see you at lunch, thanks for waiting for me, and tell your Bella Donna that Michelle will be there, she'll just be a little late.” Just like I had thought he would anyways, James followed me.

“James, transfiguration's that way.” I said pointing in the opposite direction. James rolled his eyes.

“I know the password to Dumbledore's rooms, remember?”

“You could just tell it to me.” I pointed out to him, amused. We both knew that wasn't the reason he was coming with me.

“I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.” James muttered darkly, making me laugh, even if it was rather strained. “So, did she agree to keep it a secret?” For some reason, James had taken it up on himself to make sure my secret remained that way. Whenever someone found something out about the Marauders, James was there to make sure it was kept a secret, and no one was stupid enough to screw James Potter's trust. I could bet he'd be talking to Michelle later about the importance of the secrecy.

“Yes. But she says keeping a secret's the same as lying.” Her words were bothering me, and James would make sense of them in a sense that would ease my guilt. He looked considering for a moment before saying,

“It depends on what you're keeping a secret. Yes, I suppose you could call it lying. But I prefer to call it, keeping a secret. Some people just don't get it.” I was the intelligent one, but James could weasel his was out of any form of guilt. Not pain, maybe, but guilt. And Sirius simply didn't feel guilt. Maybe it was just me.

After James left Dumbledore's offices, I stepped inside, at the password, (Saltwater taffy,) and went in, preparing for a lecture or a lesson.

AN_ I'm already working on the next chapter, but with my second novel I'm pretty busy. A few reviews could help. Just a suggustion.

4. The Definition of

AN- I HAVE SEVERAL IMPORTANT ANNOUNCMENTS! The first is that I was wrong about the definition of Bella Donna- it is the name of one poisonous plant, but translates to beautiful woman. I swore I'd say that, and now it's been said. Also, I have to pause in my writing of this, but only for a week or so. I have this really amazing plot idea, a really good one! But I want to have the time to write more than one chapter and post many at once. So please look for a fanfic called “Harry.” It's about Lily and James. For a small preview, see bottom.

Replies to reviews;

I have them all replied to. All you have to do is click on the blue word 'reviews'. Fairly simple really, so if anyone doesn't like this arrangement, please let me know. But it helps me, and it'll get the replies up faster.

Remus-

Dumbledore was sitting behind his enormous desk, as he usually was, petting the most beautiful bird I'd ever seen. It's red and golden feathers gave it away as a phoenix, and it seemed to give off and unearthly glow. I drew my eyes away from the bird under the headmaster's knotted and long fingers to the old man's fathomless eyes. The blue saw through me as he motioned for me to take a seat.

“I heard from Mr. Potter about the incident regarding your transformation. Am I to assume you have found Miss Murtha?” I nodded, unable to speak, then suddenly asked what I had initially sworn I would keep hidden.

“You knew I transformed that night, why did you let me go?” the older man looked up at me with a saddened expression.

“Remus, you need friends who know your secret, you need people who will support you, because eventually in the real world, those few werewolf rights will make life for you difficult. People will not show mercy or pity, only hostility or fear, because it is in their nature to fear what they do not understand.”

“And you thought this would be the best way for me to tell them, for them to find out?” I asked, trying to keep my calm demeanor. He probably had others, who threw immature fits, and those tissues on the desk were for the losers who let out their confessions and pain because they `needed to talk to someone', and Dumbledore was excellent at listening. But I wouldn't need the tissues or his pity.

“No, I thought this would be the only way they would ever find out. Remus, you are ashamed of something you cannot help. If Miss Murtha cannot understand that a human is your true form, then there is nothing more you can do.” All right, you know the losers who needed the tissues. Now I felt like I would become one.

“She wasn't upset about the hairy-once-a-month bit, like I thought, just the whole, `you lied to me for so long about yourself' thing. That got to her.”

Dumbledore walked around the desk with the phoenix perched on his shoulder. “Ah, yes. Well, Remus, you must understand, some people will look at this that way. Some people will fear you. Most will hold some form of ill wishes towards you. Your true friends like Mr. Potter, will get you through all of this, and stand by you and before you as you did for them.”

“So why did you want me here.”

“Just to make sure you understood, and to check that you deal with such…emotional times better than Mr. Potter. Oh, and you may want to tell Mr. Black that Professor Flitwick knows he's up to something, and he may want to restrain from launching any type of water balloon today. Perhaps another class would do better, and another day, as he has called our attention to it at a teacher's meeting.” Smiling at the thought that the Marauders were discussed at such meetings, but not at all surprised, (after all, we had known they talked about us since we had hidden in that small coat closet and listened to the Professor's teacher-only meetings,) I left for the dorm, deciding that this was as good a time as any to make up those sleepless nights.

James-

Ignore them. They aren't worth it. Ignore the looks. It's not your fault. Ignore them all, because this isn't something you can control. The voice in my head, I think it's called a conscience, reminded me. It no longer sounded like Padfoot, but all the same it had pretty good advice.

But at the moment, my mind was losing to my anger. The halls actually went into hushed whispers when I walked by. “People are staring.” Sirius acknowledged calmly as we went through the hallways and towards our evening classes.

“Don't worry, it's just my good looks.” Sirius went silent after that, noticing the wry sarcasm in my comment, and proving that even Padfoot knows when to go quiet.

Snivellus, however, didn't. “Potter, heard your father put on quite a show last night.”

“That he did, Snape.” I wouldn't call him Snivellus anymore. Lily wouldn't like that, and if I wanted to keep her, I'd have to lie off. While she could see, anyways. And sure enough, she was waiting with a small group of girls gathered around her, smiling, and blushing. She would see if I hexed Snape now, and from the way things looked she was watching me for my reaction.

But I had spent far too long staring at Lily, and Snape had noticed the direction of my gaze, I guess. Anyways, Snape went on to sneer and say,

”So the mudblood finally gave in. Is she another one of your play toys now, or-“

There's a time for silence, and a time for violence. Snape could say what he had about my father, because it was true. He was only saying what everyone else was thinking about my…bloodlines right now. But Lily was another matter entirely. He'd lost his chance at making it through the day without embarrassment.

But I didn't punch him right then and there. Don't make a mistake about my words, because I would have, had I been given the chance. But Lily got there first. SMACK! Snape's mouth was half-open in surprise, his face actually getting some color, and his black eyes wide.

Lily, meanwhile, smirked and whipped her hand on her robes, as though to get rid of the grease on her palm from his face. When she noticed everyone in the hall staring at the Head Girl in shock, she gave a smirk any Slytherin would grudgingly admit was perfect. “Well, I've always wanted to, and he had it coming!” She said as way of explanation. She pulled me aside and whispered into my ear, “Remus?”

Remembering what I was supposed to tell my “Bella Donna,” (I couldn't help but wince. Sirius and Remus would never let me live this one down,) I relayed the message. She nodded in understanding, suddenly sad. Professor Jaeger came around the corner just then, and I pulled Lily into a quick kiss before pulling her by the arm to class.

Later that night, I went to talk to Dumbledore about the Order my mum had mentioned. If she had wanted me to join it, I was in. I just wasn't sure what I was in yet. He had been expecting me, of course. I think somehow Dumbledore has a copy of the Marauder's Map, because as long as he's in the school building, he's wherever he's needed. He looked up at me expectantly, and I found myself unable to speak about it yet. Instead I just handed him my mum's letter, feeling the telltale prickle of tears and my throat tighten.

He read through it once, and then handed the letter back to me. Taking off the glasses and whipping them on his robes, Dumbledore asked, “Has anyone given you more information about the Order of the Phoenix?” looking more tired, old and frail than I had seen him ever look.

“No.” The tears and sadness of my mother's passing gave way to curiosity.

“It's a large group of everyday wizards and witches in the fight against Voldemort. Several of them didn't train to become Aurors, but they want to take part in the fight, or like yourself are too young, and still have to go through training. But it would mean you'd have to train extra hard for the fight, both physically and magically. It would mean keeping any relationships secret, because the Death Eaters and Voldemort will take advantage of any weakness. And…I may need to call you to help with the wounded or the dead. They could be people you know, more people you love.”

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I nodded. “I understand that.”

“You could end up dead.”

“I know.”

“You're putting yourself in danger.”

“I know.”

“I don't like making students members.”

I hesitated. He was clearly doing this for the same reason I was. Just to help. But my mother was gone, and these were her wishes. I was determined, and Dumbles knew better than to fight me about something I have my mind set on. “I know.”

So Dumbledore stood and offered me his hand from over his desk, covered in trinkets and treasures. “Welcome, then, to the Order.”

Great. Now to tell Lily and the Marauders. Bloody hell. I wasn't sure what would be worse.

Sirius-

Why he chose me first, I'm still unsure. `We', being the Marauders, all four of us, used to have little meetings at one in the morning in the dorms about this kind of thing, but somewhere along the way we had outgrown that. Now I could tell we were growing apart, and after school would be worse.

This just reminded me that `we' were almost out of school.

“Padfoot, are you okay?” It was one of the stupidest questions I had ever heard him ask, and that really was saying something. I nodded, keeping my thoughts on the matter in my own mind. James was doing this because of his mum, revenge, and a duty he felt he had to himself. I should be fully supporting him, but it wasn't easy to hear your best friend explain to you that he was going into the war headfirst, when you couldn't follow. That's right, I wasn't old enough, and I'd sooner get permission from my parents than I would return to that house.

“Siri?” The old nickname brought tears to my eyes, as I remembered James calling me that when we were five. So many years between us in the past were keeping us together, but that was about it. Things were changing so quickly, I wasn't sure what to do.

But like always, I didn't say this. I just said, “I'm fine, Prongs. Just thinking. Anyways, anything else?” My voice, even to me, sounded falsely cheerful.

James looked at me in concern. “Padfoot, I'll be fine. Dumbledore wouldn't ever throw me onto the field. It wont be any different unless he calls me out of class for something. It's not really anything to get upset over.”

“NOT ANYTHING TO GET UPSET OVER!” I lowered my voice when James looked around nervously. “James, it's everything! All year's been hell. He's torn everything apart, and we're still in here. What happens when we go out there?” I gestured out the window, but James knew what I meant. What happens when the Marauders leave the school and get thrown into the real world? “James, you fighting out there, it means we're leaving school earlier than we have to. We still have a month or two to stay kids! We wont be able to focus on studying for your NEWT's, we wont have time to pull anything on the Slytherins, and we'll all be torn apart.”

James swallowed hard, clearly trying to take in everything I had just said, and saying, “Sirius, I wont have time for NEWT's. I wont have time for Slytherins. And as to the torn apart thing, well, we'll just have to stay together.”

“No, James.” I calmed down, thinking things through. I had said `we' because `we' always meant the Marauders. It had been that way since school had begun. It would stay that way. “No, one goes we all go.”

“Padfoot, your parents wont ever let you go.”

“They wont have to…” I had to come up with a plan.

Remus-

Have you ever had that feeling someone's watching you? When you're a werewolf, it's two times as strong and almost always going. I'd somewhat gotten used to it, except I couldn't figure out why James was staring at me so intently while I was `sleeping'. Indeed I was awake, but the sounds of shaky breath kept me from rising just yet. James seemed deep in thought. That was never good.

Time to take action. Someone needed to comfort him, even if I needed comfort right now myself. “James?”

He looked up at me, eyes wide. “Remus. I didn't know you were awake.” He seemed startled, but for two different reasons.

“Obviously. What's wrong?” he swallowed and launched into an explanation.

“I joined the Order. It was in my mother's will that I could, I think she wanted me to fight with him. I just know I have to do this, and I asked Dumbles.”

Taking a deep breath, I fought the impulse to scream. “And?”

“He agreed.” I closed my eyes in pain. It felt like I had just lost my best friend already. Shifting under the blankets, and struggling to keep control, I motioned for James to sit at the edge of the bed.

“But you're only seventeen.”

He snorted. “You're sixteen, Remus, don't make me sound like a little kid. And besides, Death Eaters can be recruited at any age. I don't see why they should limit the age for the Order. I'll still be in school. I can handle it.” There was a pause, then, “I just told Padfoot.” Uh-oh. That explained why he was so shaken.

“Can I assume he didn't take it well?”

“It was horrible, Moony! He said we'd all split apart, and I couldn't handle it, and he wouldn't let me. Then, when I told him I would be no matter what he thought, but I'd appreciate his support, he sounded like he would be talking to Dumbledore about joining too!” James sounded completely stressed.

“Have you told Peter yet?”

“No.”

“Have you told Lily?”

“No!” I almost smiled at the unease in his voice. Both of us knew how well she'd take it. I had to be the calm one. I had to take control of the situation.

“Alright. I don't know where Peter is, I think with his girlfriend, but Lily's just going to be getting back from Ancient Runes. You can't tell her here like you told us.”

“Why not?” I actually laughed at this. James could be such a dunderhead sometimes! I'd never met anyone with such contrasting emotions.

“Because she's a female that you like that you happen to have kissed last night. She'll be expecting a relationship that will put her in danger, and she's already at risk because of her muggle heritage. Take her out to dinner somewhere, not Hogsmeade, and explain it calmly to her.” James relaxed a bit and said,

“Thanks, Moony. I don't know where we'd be without you.” `We', meant the Marauders. It always meant the Marauders. What about when that changed. Shaking the thought from my mind, I nodded.

“Anytime, Prongs. Anytime.”

Lily-

Sneaking around so as not to wake Michelle, and feeling guilty about leaving her for James, even if she was sleeping, I pulled my trunk apart, tearing through it. There had to be a decent shirt somewhere in here, I thought, as I held one after another up to me. He'd seen me in all of them, and I wanted something new.

Seeing as Michelle only wore large, baggy shirts, she wouldn't help. Finally finding something I hadn't worn in forever, (it had been at the bottom of my stack of clothing, and I'd sort of forgotten about it,) I went to put on my makeup.

It didn't occur until I was finished that I was a witch and could magic the perfect makeup onto my face, something somewhat ridiculous, as we were in a stone castle. That should say something to you about how nervous I was. But James had asked me to meet him in the common room prepared to go out somewhere, and as he hadn't actually asked me out yet (and as soon as I admit I have feelings towards him, he doesn't ask,) and so in my nerves, I wanted everything that I could have in my control to be perfect.

But there wasn't much that was in my control, besides my looks. James wouldn't tell me where we were going, why we were going there, or what we were going to do when we got there. So after spending another half-hour on my hair, (Yes, for the boys who are wondering, it is possible for one to spend a half an hour on one's hair.) I flounced down the stairs, early. All right, so I'd been a bit nervous about getting there late and gotten ready as soon as I could. Better early than late, right? But unfortunately, Remus, Peter and Sirius were in the common room, and watched me with great amusement as I stumbled over my own feet, rushing to get over to them. Apparently I'd be better to be late. Then James would be teased instead of me. But as it turned out, James was upstairs getting ready, so I had to wait down there with them.

Not that this wasn't fun in it's own right. Because the fact is, I had always wondered why they drew such a crowd in the common room, not only of girls either, so it couldn't have just been looks, and now I knew why. They didn't have to be doing anything in particular to be plain old, flat out funny. They teased, and laughed, and were so easy-going you couldn't be nervous around them. Sirius and Remus were upset about something at first, but it was clear that whatever it was, they were able to shove it from their minds. Damn, I wish I had the ability to do the same.

“Moony, I'm beating you! I'm beating Re-“

“Check and mate.” He gave a wolfish smile that gave him away as what he was, and finished off Sirius's cheers and victory dance with one move.

Sirius's face fell so fast I ended up shaking with quiet laughter. “HOW DID YOU DO THAT?” By now both Remus and I were laughing, though Remus's was a little strained. Sirius knocked over the board, an angry expression on his face. It made us laugh harder.

“Another game, Sirius?” He asked, though the laughter in his voice didn't necessarily meet his eyes. “Better yet, are there any more? I mean, there was Gobblestones,” Here, I noted the ink stains on Sirius's school shirt, “and Exploding Snap,” And Sirius's singed eyebrows, “And-“

“I get it, I've lost. You've made your point. But I can think of another one, and this one I'll always win! The laughter contest.” This, I am sorry to say, made me fall into more fits of laughter as each Marauder mentioned something that made me laugh harder, until my stomach hurt from it all, and my eyes were watering.

“James as a girl-“

“Dumbledore with pink hair-“

“Snape in a tutu.” Both went silent, looks of horror on their faces identical. James chose that moment to appear at the foot of the stairs. It must have looked pretty funny, me laughing so hard I was red, (or blue) in the face, Sirius and Remus staring at each other with dazed looks of horror and disgust.

“Sirius, what goes on in that head of yours?” Remus finally chocked out. James was watching us with interest, until I stood and said,

“Believe me, you don't want to know. But they were having a laughing contest.”

“Oh.” He said, as though that in itself explained it. I took the offered hand to help me out, smoothing my jean skirt subconsciously, and shifting in my flip-flops. The shirt had been a variety of colors, thin and light, and I was suddenly aware that if we were going into the woods, which we had to be, I wasn't dressed appropriately. James was looking appreciative though.

“Jamie, she didn't dress up for you to stare at her.” Sirius reminded. Both he and Remus were finally out of their horrified Snape induced stupors, to watch the exchange with amusement. To be honest, I hadn't dressed up for him to stare at me, but if he wanted to stare, who was I to stop him?

He nodded, and pulled gently at my am until I moved my hand down so that he was holding my hand rather than my arm. I guess it shocked him for a moment, but soon he was back to normal.

“Sorry, I guess I wasn't thinking.” I said as we left the portrait. “I mean, I wont be dressed for the outdoors.”

He gave me a smile, one that said he was up to no good. Instead of making me enraged at him like it used to, it only made my heart jump. “But Bella Donna, we aren't going outside. Not for long, anyways.” He pulled out the invisibility cloak.

“James, they've been watching the entrances to the village since the attack.”

“I know.”

“Then how're we going to-“ He put his hand over my mouth before I could finish, sweeping the cloak over us.

“Lily, what I'm going to show you is like the room I showed you to practice with your gift.” He said quietly into my ear. God James must like whispering into people's ears, because he does it often.

“What, it gives you anything you want?” I asked, confused. I felt him shake his head, as he quickly guided me over to a statue of an older witch, with a rather stooped back and a large eye.

“No, it's similar in a sense that we're the only ones that know about it. The Marauders. So what I'm doing is telling you our business. It's like making you one of us you know so many of our secrets. Please keep them to yourself.” As he said this, he pulled out his wand and muttered a nonsense Latin word under his breath, taping the back of the witch.

Slowly, the hump of the witch became a small slide, revealing a dark and narrow tunnel. James, who still had my hand, helped me quickly up, alert just in case. I slid down the stone slid, albeit uncomfortably, and landed at the bottom, moving out of the way so James could get through. A moment later a soft thud sounded, letting me know that James had landed.

:”Lumos.” He whispered, and I did the same, somewhat embarrassed that I hadn't thought of that.

“James, where does this tunnel lead?” I asked. I wasn't frightened, just…nervous. Very nervous. James smiled in the dim light wittily.

“ Hogsmeade.” Was his cheeky reply. So that was why I hadn't liked him.

“Haha.” I said dryly. “I meant, where in Hogsmeade?” James, who was carrying the cloak, and stooped in an attempt to keep from hitting his head, looked at me calmly. It did have an effect, soothing my nerves and at the same time making me more nervous.

“The cellar in Honeydukes.” He replied. “We know the owners, we'll be allowed out.” He looked over, and noticed my nerves. “Relax, Lils. I'd never lead you into danger.”

He was right, I knew, so I tried to calm down. I took note of this other nickname, and mentally laughed. James had more creative nicknames than anyone I knew or had ever met. Bella Donna, Lils, flower, Lily flower, even Evans. But he never stuck to one name, or one habit, and that was something I guess I just hadn't noticed about him before.

He went above me, lifting up the trapdoor carefully, only letting as much as his eyes show and looking around for any sign of movement. From what I could see, everything was dark. Sure enough, until someone held up a lit wand.

“James, nice seeing you again.” James gave me a cocky, smart-ass smile and tilted his head as he lifted himself out, then reached down to help me up. I stepped into the wand light to see the owner of Honeydukes holding his wand up and eyeing me curiously. “James, she doesn't look like Sirius.” The man said, amused.

“That's because she's not.” James replied with the same cheek. It was nice to see him acting fully like himself again.

“Well, that means she knows about `Marauder business.' New girlfriend?” He asked. Blushing, I went to shake my head, while James took my hand and studied my face. Looking nervous, he said,

“We were just going to see about that.” And pulled me away up the stairs, he let the owner follow.

“Well, enjoy your night out. I'm afraid I didn't quite catch your name.” He said, carelessly.

“Lily Evans.” I said, reaching the top and shaking his hand. He smiled.

“Well, it's nice to meet you, Lily. You're lucky. James hasn't shown anyone else the passage. We trust him to keep it a secret. If James trusts you, I'm sure we can.” All right, I was a little surprised. I had thought he had had this all planned out because he had done this with every girlfriend prior, but unless the owner was a very good actor, I was the first person (aside from the Marauders,) who had heard of or seen the secret passage.

“So are we going to hang around Hogsmeade?” I asked, as James hadn't said anything yet about what we were doing. He smirked and said,

“What and settle for The Three Broomsticks? Not that I dislike Rosmerta, but I had something a little nicer in mind for what I'm about to tell you.” What he was telling me that was so important, I couldn't figure out. I just let him tug me towards the Three Broomsticks, after waving goodbye to the Honeydukes owner.

“James.” Madam Rosmerta greeted him warmly. She looked at me in surprise. “Lily Evans? Well, I had never expected you and James Potter. But very well, if James brought you here this late when it isn't a trip for the school, you must be important. Now what do you want?” She looked at James carefully.

“Rosy, what would make you think I needed something from you?” He asked giving her the same puppy-eyed look he had given me. Somehow it bothered me that Madam Rosmerta had a nickname too, and that she got eh same look from him.

“That look. I'll be damned, James, you'll make me flat broke with that look, particularly if you're bringing all of your girlfriends up here now.”

James feigned hurt. “Not all of my other girlfriends. Just Lily.” She nodded, looked me over once, then said,

“Well.”

“Right.” James suddenly became very business-like, saying, “We need a portkey to dinner.” Rosmerta made a face.

“Oh, come on. Eat here, not in some fancy muggle-“

“Rosmerta, wizards can't hear about this.”

“And yet you're telling Lily. And myself, and whoever else had to help you get from the castle to here.” James nodded. “Fine. Here's you portkey. Place a finger on I don't have all night. Ready? Three, two, one…”

“Flower?” He asked when we wound up on the floor outside of some restaurant, voicing the childish nickname in concern.

“I'm okay. I just don't get along with portkeys. Anyways…” I looked around, and noticed a large glass chandelier, marble ceiling and floors, and gorgeous, candle-lit tables. It appeared to be an all-muggle area, and I felt very out-of-place, in such high-quality place. “James, I'm not dressed properly for this place. Neither are you.” I pointed out. His cloak would work on Diagon Ally, but not in the muggle world. He just smiled, scratching the back of his neck.

“Um…I know. But we aren't eating here. It's just a place of highly concentrated magic, and therefore a really good portkey point. We'll eat here someday, just…someday when I have enough money.” Blushing, he covered us in the invisibility cloak once again and led me by the shoulders to the door.

We walked around the city a bit before stopping to eat in a small muggle diner. After we had finally been served their food, James swallowed hard and, unsure, put his hand over mine, which was on the table.

“Lily.” He'd said only my name, but it was my real name, and he didn't usually do that, so he had my attention. “ You know, I wasn't lying when I said I liked you in fifth year.”

Feeling my face heat up, I said, “Yeah, I know.”

He seemed to be having trouble saying what needed to be said. Shifting uncomfortably in the booth, he averted his eyes, and then met my eyes again. I couldn't read the look in his hazel eyes. “I really like you, and I wanted to ask you out tonight. But because I really like you, I can't.” He wasn't making sense and I told him so, calm as I could. He took in a deep breath and said, “It'll make more sense after this. Please don't interrupt or be mad at me, but I joined the Order of the Phoenix. It's an elite group of people who want to fight against Voldemort. The thing is, anyone in it's in danger. And not just them… I mean anyone they care about becomes a weakness, a target. You're all ready in danger just for being…you know?”

“Muggle born?” I asked, marveling at how calm I sounded. But inside I was a whirlwind of emotions. I knew from the newspaper and Michelle, who had lost an uncle in the Order, how dangerous their work was. Many of them felt that the Ministry wasn't taking the proper course of action, so they joined. Others simply weren't well trained. But it was like committing suicide.

“Yeah. Well, you're already in danger. Being close to anyone in the Order, including me, would be… I mean…”

“James, what are you saying?”

“I'm saying I want to be close to you, but I need to join the Order. It was what my mom wanted, and I can't just ignore it. But I thought you should know what's happening.” I knew what he was really saying. He felt like we couldn't go out because of his connections, or nearly-connections, to the Order.

“James, damn the Order. But if you want it that way, you should know… I choose to put myself in danger. Because what you're suggesting is that I don't have anything to do with you. What about Remus and Sirius and Peter?” James looked uncomfortable.

“Well, I'm going to talk to them too, but I don't see the point. Everyone knows how close the Marauders are. It's kind of pointless.” I smiled. He'd said exactly what I had wanted him to.

“Then it's pointless to try this with me too. Even if we don't go past friendship, I'm still going to be there for you. I've seen you grieving and in pain before, and I've seen how you handled it. We aren't going through that again.” Besides, I thought if you leave, who will I complain to? Who will I bicker with? Who will I blame? Who will I secretly get a crush on?

James looked like he had no idea what to say. I have to admit, it wasn't anything like what I usually said. It was more like something from a soap opera, the shows my mum used to watch on the telly. But every word of it was true, and I wasn't taking it back or reconsidering. I wasn't sure if I was in love with James, but I knew now that I loved him. I didn't want to see him lonely or hurt.

Finally, after moments of trying to regain his voice, he said, “There's potential Death Eaters at school.” I hate it when people state the obvious.

“Like Malfoy? Snape? Do you really think I care?” I asked, slightly annoyed and hurt that he seemed to think of me as so helpless after I had slapped him so many times. James just sighed. There was a stained silence, until the now-familiar glint in James's eyes sparked, and he said in excitement,

“Muggle dancing?” We had finished eating by now, but that didn't end the night.

“Why not?”

AN- Ever wonder how Harry got his name? How about what brought James out of his childish games, and drew Lily towards him? And what was it that James did to Pettigrew to make him turn? Something must have drawn the Marauders apart even as it drew Lily and James closer together. What if James had seen Harry before? But that's not possible, right? Because that would mean that Harry would be in two places at once. Yes, this is a time-turner fic, back to the past. I really wanted to post one on Portkey. Please look for The Lost Marauder. At least, that's what I think I'll title it. It may be titled `Harry.' You'll see why at the end.

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5. Blood, Water, and Giving In

AN- I had a huge debate going in my head about what to title this. It was between `Giving In', because of what Lily says about James, or `Blood Is Thicker Than Water', because of what Sirius says to his parents. You decide what I should've titled it. Let me know what you think. I know it's been a while, but like I said, I'm still working on that other fic. Let me know what you think, please. Anyways, I'm not really sure what to say, except that I'm going on vacation soon, and I'm not too sure when my next update will be. Oh, and my computer broke. Yes, that's my excuse for the week. Anyways, here it goes.

I owe an apology to Sweetkiwi456; I meant to wait for you, but I have something coming up, so it was now, or a few weeks from now. So I really am sorry, and I'll write to you later. SORRY!!!!

Remus-

“I'll leave you alone if you leave me alone!”

“You're acting so childish about all of this!” I shouted back, ignoring the looks I was receiving. Michelle turned redder in the face, if it were possible.

“I'm being immature? I'M BEING IMMATURE! I'm not the one putting my friends in danger every-“

“That wasn't my fault or my decision, that was their own! And what would you honestly have done in my shoes?” Michelle paused at this comment. I took the pause as permission to continue. Maybe I was finally reaching her. “You may not have liked my decision, but ignoring me wont change it! It doesn't change anything that happened!”

“None of it should have happened!”

“If you had known, would you have gone near me?”

“NO!”

“My point has been made.” Score one for Remus. Michelle stormed out of the common room, fuming, as I flopped down on one of the couches. Everyone in the common room was watching in amazement. Michelle and I had been Hogwarts' golden couple all year, but she had been going out of her way to ignore me lately, and it was getting on my nerves. It had only been two days since…the incident, but she as acting so stuffy about it, I would've done anything to get to her.

“Nice, Moony.” Sirius said, coming down the stairs. He was still stifling a yawn, and I couldn't blame him. Thankfully, many of the teachers had been needed this morning, because of the war, and all morning classes had been called off. We needed to study for the NEWTs and James and Lily hadn't returned from their date until about one. James hadn't stopped talking about Lily and the night out until at least three, and at that point, he only stopped because Sirius threatened to tell Lily about the ridiculous love poems he hid under his bed.

Then, I had woken up to this, thinking over and over, `somebody just shoot me.' rather muggle term, I know, but it fit the occasion perfectly.

As soon as everyone had gotten over the fact that Michelle and I were no longer a couple (By getting over, I mean they were no longer staring. The gossiping continued, but the staring and silence decreased to occasional looks of sympathy and pity and whisperings instead of shocked silence.) Lily came flouncing down the stairs and into James's arms.

The room fell into shock. Pure shock. And me? I felt sick to my stomach. If this was how they were going to be after one day of going out, how would they survive their classes without one another?

So anyways, the room was once again silent, and Lily was looking around in concern at everyone, who was staring, when Sirius said, “So, who wants breakfast?” there as a murmur of general agreement as James lead Lily by the hand out of the common room and into the Great Hall.

Most of the students had slept in, as Dumbledore had turned off any alarms used to wake up the houses, and so most everyone was awake and eating by the time we got down there. The Head table was all but deserted, with only three teachers there to watch us, and Dumbledore gone. Had he been there, he would've lit up to see James and Lily walking in holding hands.

Fine, I was a little bitter about the relationship. I wasn't about to show it, I'd been good at hiding my secrets, as I had to be to keep what I was from my friends for a year. It might have been because the full moon temper I always got had yet to wear off, or because Michelle was avoiding me, but for some reason, I wanted to hit something.

Hard.

“So, Sirius…” James drifted off into an uncomfortable silence, probably remembering his friend's words last night. After James had left with Lily last night, Sirius had disappeared, but he had come back hours later looking highly satisfied with himself. Sirius's eyes were now lit up, meaning that he had an idea, which was likely to end with someone being hurt, someone being embarrassed, or unavoidable chaos, if not all of the above.

And somehow I would be dragged into all of it. Sure enough, a letter arrived for Sirius and myself with the post.

Mr. Lupin;

My office during first block. Password; orange toffees.

I knew exactly who the letter was from. There was only one person in the school who would create a password such as `orange toffees.' But I wasn't sure at the moment what Dumbledore wanted, or what I was getting myself into, so I set the letter aside.

Just in time to see Sirius pale slightly as a large black owl flew his way. It didn't have a black enveloped letter tied to its leg, however, as the ministry death owls did. This letter was on plain parchment, with a plain white envelope and a wax seal. And as I looked across the room, I saw that Sirius's brother, Regulus, was receiving a similar letter, but looking satisfied, even smug, at untying it.

Sirius read through it once, and then seemed to just stare at it in shock. I knew better than to try to take the letter from him; I recognized the owl. But it hadn't come to Sirius since…third year? Fourth year?

The Black family owl.

Sirius-

Sirius~

You were my firstborn child, and my pride and joy until your first year in Hogwarts. You know that we loved you, and only disowned you for your foolishness towards the Dark Lord and his high goals.

But your father seems to still believe that Black blood will pull through, and in the end you will realize your foolishness before it's too late. So we are willing to give you a second chance. The Dark Lord has offered you and your brother a place in his ranks, and we have agreed to pass this offer along.

It is an opportunity not to be missed Sirius. Should you choose to agree, you will be welcomed back with open arms.

Remember, son. Blood is thicker than water.

Blood is thicker than water? Of all the things she could've said…

Let's review. First she insults me, and insists I'm no son of hers if I'm a Gryffindor. Then she spends years not talking to me, and insisting that I not return to her house over the summer, so I resorted to James and Remus giving me a home for vacations. Then, one year, she tells me to return home, only so she can disown me. Now, she wants me to come back and act like one of them?

But this year I had realized a lot of things. James had lost his mother, who had become a mother to me since my own had kicked me out in third or second year, through a letter of all things. He hadn't had the option of coming back to her, she'd been taken away.

And she had left my best friend heartbroken. Would I really feel the same if my mother died? I mean, I may have been a little letdown at it, but she was only my birthmother. The only relation I'd ever had to her was blood.

She gave birth to me.

She kicked me out.

She offered me a home for years.

She couldn't accept me for what I was, what I believed in. And that was the end of that argument. I put the letter in my pocket, and opened the one from Dumbleydore. Yes, I too have a nickname for our old friend. Years of trips up to his office had taught us that formality was wasted on him.

Mr. Black,

After our…conversation yesterday, I have carefully considered your words and decided to comply with your request. Accompany Mr. Lupin to my office during first block he knows the password.

I smiled, reading the note and remembering the `conversation' Dumbleydore was referring to. After James had left yesterday with Lily, I had decided to ask the Headmaster for permission to join the Order.

He hadn't been very understanding about why I wanted to join, insisting I needed my parent's permission, something that he knew I'd never get. But I hadn't caved easily, and while I hadn't broken anything except the old professor's determination, I'd gotten my message across. Remus and I wanted to join the Order.

I knew Peter wouldn't want to. He'd always wanted to stay safe, and the fact was he'd never get his mother to agree with it, because she was too protective of him. Remus, I knew, could reason with his parents, and me? Well, that was why I had been yelling yesterday.

Satisfied with the way things were working out between me and the Order, I went on to eat breakfast, oblivious to the fact Remus and James had been trying to get my attention since I had opened my parent's letter.

“PADFOOT!” I think I jumped about a foot high before landing back on the wooden bench.

“Ouch. You know, this thing is wooden. I think I have splinters up my arse now!”

Unfortunately for me, McGonagall was standing over us with a very stern look on her face. But instead of telling me off for my tongue, (you'd think by now she'd have given up; I know I would've,) she simply said, “The Headmaster would like to see you and Mr. Lupin.” I looked down at my barely-eaten breakfast. Well, so much for food.

Lily-

“They're staring again.”

“I know.” Poor James. I mean, a year ago I would've thought that he'd deserved it for something or another he had done, but now he acted like he really didn't like all of this attention. His eyes were turned down, his face red. I think he used to like it, really, but with everything that had been going around about him, his father, and me, we both knew the stares weren't because of his looks or the latest quidditch game.

Time for a change of topic. “Where do you think Remus and Sirius have gotten to?” James smiled at this, the same cocky smile I was used to, and ran his hand through his hair, still coyly grinning. But there was a tired air around him, reminding me again of how much had changed this year.

“It's not where they've gotten to, but rather what Sirius has gotten Remus into. Poor guy's too gullible; he'll let us drag him into anything.” Yes, that sounded like Remus. Quiet, shy, and desperate to fit in. But now that I knew his secret, now that I thought about Michelle's reaction, I understood why. He must not feel accepted that often, really, because he's always so different from others.

Right now, however, Remus and Sirius weren't here, and Peter, seeming to sense what I was thinking, left. It only took a minute for James to wrap his arms around me comfortingly. “We didn't want it to be a secret.” He murmured next to my ear. At least he wasn't whispering.

“I know. But I didn't expect that kind of a reaction. I mean, I never thought about it before, but it's almost like I was giving in.” James had a familiar smell about him by now. Fresh air, breakfast, and a smell that was…James.

Wait…since when had I started to smell James? “Is giving in really a bad thing?”

Oh, yeah. Since he had started to say things like that rather than `go on, go out with me, Evans.' Damn. I think his voice cracked when he said it, too.

“That was so corny.” Damn voice. Mine had just cracked too. He kissed my forehead lightly. Tease.

“I know. That's why I said it.” Soon we were kissing, something I guess was bound to happen when you leave the two of us alone in a deserted corridor. Would this always be like this? No, because I wouldn't always be dating him. One day, he'd cheat on me like he had all of those other girls…

What other girls? Sure, he'd had dates, but keeping a girl past date one, or asking her to be his girlfriend? He hadn't done it. And he'd claimed to me before that it was because he wanted me to know he was always open, and hadn't given up yet.

Yes, I'd diffidently given in. But giving isn't always a bad thing.

Remus-

I wasn't sure what to expect when I entered Dumbledore's office. Maybe a detention, or a scolding, or an interview on how James was doing, as had become common over the last year. Whether Dumbledore will admit it or not, he has a soft spot for our Prongs. I would even go so far as to say he has a soft spot for all of the Marauders. It was a well-known fact Dumbledore let us get away with nearly anything, the only way we got through school with a few detentions and a suspension on Sirius's behalf, after he nearly got Snivellus killed while revealing my secret last year. (Apparently, he spent his suspension in a room in the Leaky Caldron when his family refused to house him.)

Anyways, the point of this speech was, I wasn't expecting my parents. And my reaction to seeing them in the Headmaster's office? “Whatever it was, I assure you I had nothing to do with it! Really, Sirius and maybe James did this one by themselves.” At the time I was wondering what Sirius could've come up with that had gotten my parents involved, along with thinking of how many ways I could kill Sirius, and how many ways I would kill Sirius.

But my mother just gave me a questioning look, while my father shook his head. “This has nothing to do with pranks, does it Headmaster?” from the sound of the question, he didn't know any more than I did. Yah! Maybe in this one I could save myself!

“No,” Came Dumbledore's serine voice. “No, what we're about to discuss is no laughing matter.” Sirius had settled down in one of the chairs on the other side of Dumbledore's desk, the one he called his favorite. Ironically, there were always four chairs in his office, even if only two or three were being used. James often joking it was so that the office could be prepared for when they had gotten in trouble and had to wait for the Headmaster.

Anyways, I took my `favorite' seat, while my mother sat next to me, looking fearful. My father didn't sit, just paced. “It may or may not have come to your attention that James Potter has recently joined with the Order of the Phoenix.” He began. Thankfully, my parents are very up to date, and while they hadn't known that James had joined, (how could they have, I had only been informed last night?) they were at least aware of the Order's presence, and what the Order did.

“James?” My mum gasped, looking horrified. She had heard from me at Christmas how he was dealing with his mother's death, and while she didn't know him too well, he had visited a few times during certain summers.

“Indeed. His mother gave him permission, and he agreed. But Mr. Black here wasn't satisfied with the fact that James had permission to join the Order and he didn't. He and I have had a rather trying discussion and come to the decision that anyone aware of the Order and in danger already should be given the opportunity.”

“Why are you coming to me first?” I asked, breathless. I didn't want to think about the offer yet, and what the consequences would be from my decision. It put on to much pressure. For now, I'd have to push it into the back of my mind.

Dumbledore gave Sirius a stern look over his half-moon glasses, and I realized that this discussion had been a loud and possible violent one when Padfoot began to look sheepish. Damn dog.

“ I've already had this discussion with Mr. Black. Your friend didn't want you to be left out.” he replied, just as sternly, but there was a twinkle in his eyes.

“Padfoot…” I groaned. Sirius smiled in my direction.

“Mr. Lupin, I believe Mr. Black only wanted to help you this time. It is in such times we will need such strong bonds.” The headmaster stood and looked at my parents in turn. They seemed to squirm in their skin, and I understood the feeling. Even now, my parents felt like children again under his gaze. Anyone fixed with that stare, even if they weren't a student from before, would feel little again. “Please discuss this with your family, and use the rest of the morning to do so. When you wish to answer, check the paper in your pocket, the letter I sent you. The password will be printed on it for you, as I will have to change it now that Mr. Black, prankster of Hogwarts, knows how to get easy access to my office and quarters. Please take your time on this decision, you know fairly well how it could affect you.”

We took this as a dismissal, and left. In the hallway, there was an awkward silence. “Sirius, what about Peter?”

“What, with Mrs. Pettigrew?” Yikes. Yeah, he had a point. I'm surprised she let Peter into Hogwarts, though I can't really blame her for being careful. Peter was more than a little clumsy.

Sirius made a quick exit, knowing very well that a full interrogation was about to follow, and not wanting to be any part of it. He was already on bad terms with my family and had been since last year, when he had almost lost me my secret and another's life. Oh, and the fact that he had openly insulted my dad in second year when he noticed that my father was unsure of me didn't help their opinion.

Sure enough, here came the questions. “How's Michelle going,” “How's James doing,” and all others I answered them the best I could, only half in it, and somewhat dazed, thinking about what responsibility I would have if I accepted.

Finally, they asked me things about my decision. The first was, “What would you be doing?”

“From what James said, just little things. Writing, behind the scenes work, maybe…helping with cleaning up. But mostly, it's just us attending the meetings, and giving input and opinions.”

“So would you be at risk?” Of course, that came from mum.

“Mum, I already am. I'm a werewolf remember? And I'm James's best friend, aside from Sirius, I don't plan to change that because I'm at risk, and I openly oppose Voldemort. This just means that I have a way to fight back now, and more people behind me.” The more I thought about it, the more my anger towards Sirius died down, to make way for understanding. He really was helping, and he knew it.

“Is this…” My dad has never been sure around me, or at least, not since I was bitten. But I was used to it, and gave him time to watch me carefully. “Is this what you want?”

I hesitated only a moment. I was risking my life, but it was with my friends. If this was how I was to die, I couldn't think of a more honorable way to than next to Sirius, James and Peter, who were my family. My brothers. “Yes.”

Sirius-

I think this was the third time I was rereading the letter from my pocket. It was lunch, and I still didn't know what I would do. I had been so positive I was out of my family's life for good, but now they were offering to let me back in.

Regulus had been calling me over, during lunch, and I came over to him. I knew what he wanted. “Hey, Siri.” It was the name he'd called me as a kid, but I hadn't heard it in years. It had what was probably the desired effect. I chocked up. “Are you going to?”

I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “I don't know.”

“You actually aren't agreeing yet? I mean, it's the most powerful force, and with such a good cause. Mudbloods are the wizard's filth.” I felt a fury shake within me when I heard someone like my brother insulting someone like Lily.

He was wrong. People like him, people who couldn't see past purity, were the wizard's filth. Just because Snape could trace his bloodlines, didn't give him my good hair. And Lily wasn't any less kind or fiery or brave because she had traces of non-magic blood in her. He was wrong.

And so was mother, and I told her so the next morning, on the paper she had written my letter on before, right under that last line that read `Blood is thicker than water.' It was just one line, a few words, really, but I felt proud of myself all the same for my reply.

Not always.

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6. AN

AN- I hate to do this, but I need to pause this fic for a few reasons, the first being I am still working on another one, that I want pre-written before I post it, and the second being that I am now on vacation, and it will take a while after I come back to write the next chapter, edit it, (Beta) and post it. But I replied to everyone's reviews, so hopefully anything I wrote there will give you something to think about. Sorry!

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7. The Last Month

AN- Thank you so much, everyone, for the compliments. I really appreciate the reviews, and I reply to everyone, so remember to check the reviews box. Also, I have a million ideas for possible challenges, could someone with some experience tell me how to post a challenge? I'd really appreciate that too. Anyways, that's all I have to say. And as of now, I AM ON VACATION! Thank you.

Disclaimer- why do we write these? I wonder if J.K. reads these fanfics. I mean, maybe she has several ideas as to what will happen, then reads these. That would explain how she always knows what we were and weren't expecting, I think. It makes sense. That's bout all I have to say, except that when I get my story published, I'm going to try to get people to write fanfiction for it, then I'm going to read it. But not for the same reasons as J.K. Just because I wont have to write a boring disclaimer like this.

Sirius-

“It's brilliant. And they'll never expect it, because you haven't done anything all year!” I whispered to James as he pulled out the Marauder's Map, saying words that could never be said too often, `I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good'. I would know, because I thought of them. Remus says it's a rare stoke of brilliance on my behalf, something I'm really proud of…hey! I just got that!

Moony's going to get it!

Anyways, the prank was our most brilliant so far. Normally, we made it only on Slytherin, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw, even only on Gryffindor… long as it wasn't on the four of us. But this was a full-scale attack on the whole school.

Well, what did they expect? Everyone was all tense about NEWT's and had been all month, even us. But now that that was over, the Marauders were graduating. It was one of the biggest days in Hogwarts history, something that would be remembered for it's extravagance…but just in case, we would make it memorable.

What is it? Well, we weren't sure what it was just yet. But it was full scale.

James was thinking of when the best time would be, but when we had all admitted that the leaving feast would be best…well, it left us only three days.

And tonight was a transformation.

“James, what are you doing?” I asked, as James shushed me.

“ Snivellus is coming.”

“Thought you were too good to hex Snape.” I said, annoyed at the memory of him telling me off for doing just that. James smiled crookedly, and I saw then what was coming next.

“But Lily was around then.” He replied, and I smirked as well.

“What's your idea?” I asked.

“You know how earlier, Trelawney spooked him?” James asked, and I nodded. It had been a rumor around the school, (started by me) that Snape had wet his pants when Trelawney had said she had seen his death coming. “Well…do you think Snape believes in the Grim?” James asked, and I smiled maliciously, nodding as I assumed my animal form. I never could've thought of that.

God I was glad he was back, and just in time. This was the Marauder's last month at Hogwarts. The last month before we step into the real world!

Think they're ready for us? I know Hogwarts wasn't. Nothing was Marauder-proofed. Is that even possible?

Michelle-

This may surprise you, but I have nothing against werewolves. Well, I admittedly have a fear of them, but that isn't what this was about.

This was about Remus and myself, and all of the secrets he had kept from me. There was no way, I told myself, that I could forgive him.

But then I got a little curious, and curiosity had overcome anger, and soon I had found myself researching werewolves, in the light of the full moon. I discovered a lot there that night, starting with all that humanity had done to werewolves. If Remus had admitted what he had been to me, and someone had overheard and told the ministry, he couldn't have gone to school. When he left Hogwarts, he couldn't marry, could have children, because besides the fact that they were illegal, they would die in a non-werewolf mother, and couldn't have any job within the ministry.

And now you've gotten me started on the few jobs. It now made sense, why someone so smart would have no future chosen already. He didn't seem to have a future. But I had heard from Sirius, James and Peter about the trouble they had undergone to become animagi, and in the end Remus would be fine.

Point behind my soapbox was, I couldn't stay upset with him for his secret, and it left me in a strange position indeed. Tonight was a full moon…what better time to overcome my fears?

So I brought with me as much silver as I could carry, in case… hopefully I wouldn't need it. I talked Lily into getting me to the door, as she was Head Girl, and from there went to the Shrieking Shack. I had to make an apology.

There was a large black dog, (I thought it was a bear at first,) guarding the willow, the entrance Remus had told me about. It growled at first, but softened when it saw who I was. Then, in a second at the most, Sirius Black stood, brushing his robes off.

“Michelle? Remus is pretty bad this month, I think you might want to get out of-“

“I know you're just trying to help, but if he's upset when he transforms, wont it make it worse?” I asked, I had read it that night, and realized what Remus could be doing to himself or his friends by himself. This had been a bad month, after becoming a member of the Order, (lily had told me,) and my reluctance to accept him for what… who he was.

Sirius nodded slowly, and I noted a tear in his robes at the knee. He saw where I was staring, and said, “It's not a bite, and I'm fine. Prongs… I mean James is trying to calm him down…but I'm not sure…” His voice drifted off, but he didn't need to say anymore. He wasn't sure how bad the damage would be after tonight, for all of them, including Remus himself.

“Could I see him? Please? I mean, I think it would calm him down, if James could just control him…” Sirius looked like he was about to object, then thought of something, and nodded, leading me towards the willow. He made a face, took three large steps from a certain tree, and then jumped up and down on the ground. Seeing my look, he said,

“The echo carries down to the Shack. Peter hears it, and freezes the knot, so we can get in.” I nodded, understanding. There was no way to get around the willow, so that was how they got in. “I'm going to be protecting you the entire time, and don't think of telling me otherwise. And tomorrow, Remus will be pissed at you. Not me. Understood?” I nodded, silently laughing. Remus would indeed, be pissed at someone, because I could imagine him fairly protective of anyone in his wolf form…

Peter must have touched the knot, because Sirius grabbed my wrist impatiently, explaining, “We've only a small opening to go in.” when I hesitated at the entrance, he said sympathetically, “you could do this tomorrow.”

“No.” I answered, knowing it was dramatic but true. “No, I couldn't.”

The stag watched us enter, and I watched as James Potter's familiar eyes lit up when they found me in panic. The werewolf behind him was whimpering, and breathing hard. Glass was sticking out of it's back, the shard bloody, and I realized he had rammed himself into one of the windows.

Its grey and black fur was matted with a rusty blood, and it was slightly leaner than a wolf. The tail was tufted; like I had found out when I had researched werewolves, and it's eyes were clearly dilated.

But they were still Remus's eyes. And they came to life when they recognized me. He limped towards me, as the glass was embedded in his right shoulder blade. It was swollen, and the fur around there was twisted. That would hurt tomorrow when he woke up.

Sirius, who had been behind me and transformed, growled lightly and put himself between the wolf and me. But Remus lowered his head slightly, and whimpered again. Gingerly I walked around the big black dog to tough the werewolf's muzzle.

He snapped at my hand, but rather half-heartedly, and then walked around again, looking tired. James seemed to think it was safe, because the stag went into a tired position. Sirius, still standing in front of me defensively, noticed the same thing and he too lay down next to the wolf, panting. Feeling a little alone, I walked over to the area they were laying down in.

The werewolf came over to me, unsure, and I gently put my hand out, just as unsure. It looked like Remus was too tired to argue, and I slowly stoked his head, carefully. I pulled the wolf into my lap, and gently pulled out the glass, jumping back when the jaws snapped closed again, barely missing my wrist. Then, it seemed to looked at me as though saying `I'm sorry.'

“So am I.” I said aloud, into the ringing silence.

Remus-

Someone was going to die. I wasn't sure whom yet, but the next person to talk to me was going to get anything they said thrown in their face.

My back was on fire. Pomfery had healed it in a minute, like she always did, but the toxin had burned, and still did, and at that moment, lying down wasn't a pleasant thought.

There had been a note folded into my hand, that I had found when I had woken up, saying that Michelle wanted to talk to me. But I couldn't remember much of last night, or what had happened at all, in fact, other than that there was a new scent, a pleasant human one. And I hadn't wanted this human hurt… not killed anyways. Some animal instincts you just can't kill fully.

Thankfully, she wasn't in the hospital wing, and hadn't been since she'd visited me earlier, according to Madam Pomfery. So when I left, I was determined to find her, scold her firmly for what worry she had put me though, endure her insults, and then throw them back at her.

In fact, I really was looking forward to the fight, because there was a lot I had to say that was on my mind, my defense, as it were.

So she had to apologize. “I'm sorry.” She said, simply. She looked exhausted. “I was out of line, saying what I had.” I swallowed every scathing word I had thought up, took a few deep breaths, thought of myself as Remus rather than as I, (as a werewolf I didn't think of myself as a human…I thought of myself as me, or I) and tried to comfort her. She was, needless to say, crying again.

“It's alright, you had every right to be mad. I shouldn't have kept that from you, and you grew up afraid of people like me.” I replied, taking her in my arms, trying to smooth her long brown hair.

I could feel her shaking when she said, “But you're still people. And I didn't treat you like one.” She kissed me, and I started to kiss her when I remembered something I had thought up before.

I pulled away, saying, “Michelle, this couldn't go anywhere. If you know anything about werewolves-“

She nodded, eyes red-rimmed, but face determined. “ I know. But it can't stop us from being together. And, I mean, you know how good I am at potions…”

“You can't cure me.” I cut in, knowing she was referring to a way to reverse the lycanthrope. Her brown eyes were lit.

“Maybe not. But I can try.”

Lily-

I hate speeches. Ever since I've been little, it's been a fact. I can stand up to bullies, I can answer a question from a teacher under the eyes of an entire class, but on stage it's different.

A potion can't cure this. This is called stage fright.

James didn't have this problem. He had had a problem writing the speech, because both Head Boy and Girl were expected to give one. And I helped him with it, and did my own, and was fairly proud of it.

James came in as I recited it for the millionth time, memorizing it. Not that it would matter under the lights. “Lily, love, you'll do fine.” He said, when he heard what I was saying. “It's a beautiful speech.”

“It's not the speech I'm worried about.” I replied.

“What then?” He asked, sitting at the table given for us in our rooms, and helping himself to a fruit. “The length? Because it is pretty long.”

“No.” I answered, annoyed. “But thank you, for giving me something else to worry about.” I ran through it again, determined to take out a few unnecessary lines.

“Flower, than what…” James drifted off, and I saw comprehension dawn on his face. “ You have stage fright.” He said, and started laughing.

“It's not funny!” I persisted, annoyed at the easy laughter. My words just made James laugh harder, holding his stomach.

As angry as this made me, I noted how nice it was to see him smile, and laugh, and how his eyes twinkled with a light that I swore was magical, and how his lips were curved, and…

But that didn't mean I wasn't angry. Because I was furious. “James Potter, I'm not someone to laugh at! Do you remember the last time you laughed at me?” I had cursed him into next week and back, as it were.

“No. That was forever ago.” He replied lightly. But at least he'd stopped laughing. “Come on, though. I mean, of all things to stop you, stage fright?”

“It's not just that.” I replied, annoyed that he didn't feel the same. “It's that, when I give this speech, it means school's over, and we have to leave everything we've become so familiar with. I mean, we'll lose everything, and everything will be new, and…”

James sat down next to me and took me hand, face serious but eyes still laughing, and said, “Not everything will be different. You'll still have me.” He continued to massage the palm of my hand, even as his smile came back. “And Sirius, and Remus, and Peter, and from what I heard and saw last night, Michelle.” My eyes widened.

“What happened last night? She got me to take her to the door, but didn't tell me what she had planned. I thought he transformed last night.”

“He did.” James replied quietly.

“Then how… she saw him in his other form?” I asked, scared at the thought.

“Yeah. And after she did, she apologized, and this morning they're meeting to work the whole thing out.” James caught my smile and said, “There, that's much better. Now, how about we take you out to Hogsmeade and get a butterbeer and some Honeydukes chocolate to cure your stage fright?”

Remus-

James stood up to a clapping crowd, smiling easily, and said, “Well, it's over, and the first thought that comes to mind is, `freedom!'” here everyone laughed, and James let them before continuing. “But Hogwarts became a home to many of us, and our best friends became our family, and the changes that have happened here, the hardships we've went through together, all of the times, good and bad, will be remembered, even out of school.” I sucked in a breath, and thought of the last seven years, and saw the people around me doing the same thing.

“I'm Remus. And you are?” the boy with unruly black hair and a crooked smile gave me a little look. Through the window, I could hear a woman screech,

“James Potter, if I get one owl telling me you've destroyed Hogwarts the way you destroy home, I'll be off to tote you back home. You behave, understand?”

The boy stuck his head out the window, saying, “Yes, mam!” with that, he saluted the woman, and then offered me the hand.

“James Potter.”

* * *

“Why is everyone staring?” I asked. James gave me a look. But his face wasn't one of shock, but of glee.

“Sirius was sorted into our house!”

“So?” I asked, knowing he was referring to the boy who had been before us quite a bit in the line.

“So Blacks are never sorted into Gryffindor. But he's my friend, and he's not like the rest of them.” We sat stubbornly next to Sirius Black, who looked apprehensive, before seeing James. After whispering,

“I could hug you right about now,” he said, “who's the new best friend?”

* * *

“How did you know?” I asked, shocked. Were they going to leave me? They did look angry.

“You blink too much.” Sirius answered absently. Trust Sirius, I thought, to look at how many times I blink when I lie. James, breaking away from Sirius's grip, punched me square in the jaw, and I felt so bad after the transformation I didn't fight back. This was going to kill me. Not the transformation. Losing my friends.

“That's for lying.” James said, spitting in anger. Then, he handed me a potion, and said, “but that's for pain. Take it, and sit down. Sirius and I have an idea, and Peter's going to do it too.”

* * *

They were better friends than I could ever have asked for. Over the last seven years, we had lifted each other up, gotten each other through the hardship encountered by everyone else, made each other laugh, cry, but above all, taught each other. Because, God, we had taught each other so much, even more than all of the teachers in this school had over the last seven years. Forgiveness, love, acceptance, and so much more.

But then the moment of silence passed by, and James continued his speech, which was rather good, and along the same lines as my thoughts. He finally stepped back, and Lily stepped forward, welcoming the future.

It would be quite a future indeed, but I wasn't as interested in that as I was in the small notch in the corner of the room, where Sirius stood. It was almost time.

Sure enough, right as Lily's speech ended, while everyone clapped, the banners in the room, above every house table, fluttered, as though in a breeze. But there was no wind in the Great Hall. Then, the animal on every banner came to life, leaving it's position on the fabric to walk onto the table and make the noise it would if it were alive, the lion roaring and leaving all of the muggles with magical sons or daughters to scream.

Everyone who knew us, however, could only laugh. But the prank wasn't even over yet. A moment later, the Ravenclaws sprouted wings, pushing them from their chairs, the Gryffinors gained wicked golden tails, the Slytherins disssscovered forked tongues, and the Hufflepuffs found badger claws where fingernails should've been, making them unable to pick any food up.

And the four of us stood up, amide gales of laughter, and bowed, our prank complete.

And no one bothered to tell us off. Maybe it was because they were laughing too hard, or because they didn't have the heart to. Soon they would lose us, and the real world would have to let us in.

Poor real world.

AN- I'm aware that this chapter is somewhat short, and the prank wasn't a great idea, but I wanted to get something out o my last day before vacation, and it couldn't be too long, because I needed to edit it myself. Otherwise I wont get anything out for another couple weeks, you know why? I'M ON VACATION! But hopefully you'll be okay with this chapter. Next one will be pure humor, probably. James meets Lily's parents. Enjoy, and please, review!

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8. The Different Levels of Fear

AN- Sorry this took so long. School starts soon, and I've been busy. Oh, and our computer needed to be reformatted. But anyways, here it goes. You'll get a kick out of this one. But I wasn't too sure what to title it again. I ended up with ` The Different Levels of Fear,' because the whole thing is about different kinds of fear. Not fear of danger, but fear of other things, whether it's change, or girls, or meeting the parents. So I was debating between this and `Meet the Parents', but I really like writing about Sirius and Remus too, and the whole thing isn't about meeting Lily's parents. Tell me what you think!

This one is dedicated to Hahahahahaha anonymous.

James-

“Not Fair.” I said, or, that was what I meant to say. It came out, much to my embarrassment, like a squeak. Or a squawk, in a higher pitch. It didn't sound like my normal voice, which was enough to get Lily giggling.

“Not much in life is.” She replied. “What's the matter, though? Stage fright?”

“Alright, so I shouldn't have laughed at you. I get it. But really, I mean, I have a dead mother and a drunk father. But your parents-“

“Will want to meet you, and know the man I've come to love. As will my sister. Besides, they're expecting me home anyways.”

We were walking absently around the grounds on our last day at Hogwarts. It was only a half-a-day. A half-a-day until I left `home', as it had become, forever. I glanced into the forest, where Sirius, Remus, Peter and I had had our first real transformation together, our first real adventure.

Lily turned to see what I was staring at. Both of us were silent when she said, “And besides, where else do you plan to go?”

I wasn't going to Auror Academy, that was for sure. I mean, it had been offered. But after what I had seen, it wouldn't be something I'd look into. And I couldn't really stay with the Order. I wasn't in very deep yet.

Where else did I really have to go?

Besides, Lily was giving me that pleading look, and you almost could never say no to that face. At least, I couldn't. She could clean my wallet out come Christmas with that look. “Fine.”

Lily squealed, hugged me around the shoulders, and jumped up and down in her excitement before saying, “So you'll be meeting them tonight.”

“Tonight!”

“Yeah. They're coming to pick me up at the Hogwarts Express.”

“But you're of age!” I protested. “And I'm of age. We can just find somewhere to stay until we can apperate there tomorrow!”

“Yes, but because of the chaos at the ministry, they can't really afford to be taking young witches and testing them for their apparating licenses. Besides, they always pick me up. Tradition!” She was becoming more and more excited at the thought of me meeting her family, and I couldn't protest.

I really am dead come Christmas time.

Remus-

“Are you sure you don't mind me moving in with you, Peter and James? Just until I can figure out what is going on between me and Michelle?” I asked. “Because I really could rent another apartment.”

Sirius gave me a look that said to stop asking, so I did. He and I were packing, about to leave behind our childhood forever. Or, we were supposed to be. Padfoot was too busy staring out the window.

“Padfoot?” I asked, annoyed that he had only taken a moment to look in my direction. He looked my way again, then saw my look, the one I had to give him every time he couldn't focus on the homework, and went back to packing.

Satisfied, I went back to trying to fit a large amount of sweaters into a small amount of space. The trunk's lid, unfortunately, shook with the box, and came back down all the way on my fingers.

After yelping I went on to rub my hand. Padfoot spared me a distracted glance before going back to staring out the window to the grounds. Finally fed up with the neglect, I asked, “What is so bloody interesting out there?”

“Hm?” Sirius asked, looking away and going back to packing.

“No, Sirius, you aren't getting away with it this time.” I replied, making my way towards the window. Sirius abruptly tried to pull the curtains shut. Determined, I opened them. When he shut them again, it was so forceful a tug that the hangings fell.

Only to reveal James and Lily talking. And walking. Just that. No kissing, no snogging. Lily was sort of leaning on him, and both were walking slowly, but it wasn't really anything new, or anything to look at.

“What did you find so interesting about this?” I asked.

“Nothing. I was just remembering all that's happened out there.” He replied, packing his things again.

“Liar.” I replied, annoyed. He wouldn't meet my eyes, and I could tell he was, `blinking too much'. Sirius had always said that blinking too much meant you were lying.

Sirius sighed and abandoned his task a third time, looking out the window.

“Is that how you and Michelle usually are?” He asked suddenly, still not meeting my eyes. “Walking in sync, laughing, her hanging on you?”

“Yeah.” I answered. “Pretty much. Why?”

“He should be with the Marauders on our last day instead of with her.” He replied sullenly, not answering my question.

“Oh, please, Padfoot. You were one of the many reasons they got together. Now is not the time for jealousy.” Sirius sank into his four-poster, and I sank down next to him. “What's really wrong?”

“I was just thinking…” He drifted off. “How come you and Michelle are so…”

“So what?”

“So… I mean, you haven't gotten rid of her. You really like her. You talk to her about real things, stuff you'd usually only come to the Marauders about, and eve stuff you don't tell us about. And James couldn't talk around Lily at first. He acted like such an idiot in front of her…”

“So?” I asked.

“So…I mean, girls do that for me, but so far I haven't really found a girl to do that for.” He replied. Smiling a bit, he added, “I mean, I know I'm good, but there has to be someone good enough or me.”

Rolling my eyes at the mock attempt at being cocky, I said, “You don't stutter on purpose…it just happens. And one day it will happen to you, and you'll regret ever wishing that it did, because you'll be so embarrassed. And you'll be afraid that she won't like you, or afraid that you look ridiculous-“

“I could never look ridiculous, and even I know that.” Sirius cut in indignantly.

“Right. Just keep telling yourself that. And I'll be there to laugh at you when you do find such a girl. Now finish packing.”

Sirius did as he was told, saying, “So did you find a job that would accept you yet?”

“No.” I replied, almost hurt by his blunt way of saying it. But that was Sirius for you. Blunt, shallow, and annoying, most of the time. “None of the jobs under the ministry accept werewolves. I'll have to find a private business, and convince them to take me.”

“Isn't the Leaky Cauldron a privately owned business?” he asked his eyes on his task.

“No. It can't be, because it has the entrance to Diagon Alley in the back of it, and that's Ministry-owned. I'll find somewhere though.” Here, Peter came in and start packing, with James. The conversation stopped, and moved on to funnier things, like pranks to remember and `common mistakes' that every prank maker would had to have made in order to achieve perfection.

“Remember that time we followed that passageway behind that portrait of Davis the Dimwitted to avoid McGonagall-“

“And ended up in the girl's washrooms? How could I forget? The look on your face, Padfoot…”

“See, he has that look again!”

“Those were Seventh years, and we were only first years… well, I guess some things will never change. But how did we manage to work our way out of that one, after the tunnel we had used to get there had caved in?”

“Well, we asked where the little boys room was, and that pretty Catharine showed us, and Sirius did that puppy-look, but then-“

Well, we would work our way out of this, we always did. And we'd get through the change together.

James-

There are several different levels of fear. There is a slight unease, a panic, heart-stopping terror, and then there was this.

This, an emotion beyond words…yeah, that was the kind of fear I was feeling right now. It was a gut wrenching, unbelievable, horrifying…

Yes. This confirms it. I was indeed panicking, and fairly badly. I loved Lily. I knew now that I did, but it wasn't about that right now. Right now was about convincing her family I could take care of her, even though I didn't have a job, or any job in mind, or a home that didn't belong to family. Even though in some people's opinion, I couldn't even take care of myself.

But her parents were nice enough. They welcomed me, and her dad smiled at me, and they agreed right away to let me come home with them for a bit. He helped me load the luggage, and we all packed into the car, and suffered the long drive with Lily telling them everything about the war, and how I was involved, and what had happened at Graduation, and everything else. I just sort of sat there, terrified of what would happen when the questions began.

Eventually we were there, at an ordinary-enough looking house, and I was unloading the luggage again. I carried my stuff up to the spare guestroom, and unpacked, stills silent.

I stayed in my room, too. Even after the unpacking, I just sort of stayed there, sitting on the bed and thinking until Lily came in and announced that dinner was ready.

This was what I had been dreading. Dinner. The ideal time for questioning.

It ended up pretty funny, though, to be honest. The first comical thing I could name was sitting at the coffee table in the sitting room.

At first I though it was an elephant. A red-ish, small-eared, elephant. Or a hippo. A hippo would be more appropriate. But an elephant really is what first came to mind. It was a he really, with crazy looking, budgie eyes, and bushy eyebrows, and…well, did I mention that this guy was fat? I mean, fat.

There wasn't any other word for it. I don't have anything against fat people, I really don't. Peter isn't too thin himself. It's their body to do with, as they like.

But this guy really was just so…fat; he took up a good amount of the table.

Lily and I both walked in, and then stopped at the edge of the room, gaping. He was talking to Lily's parents and holding a bony-lady's hand in his own…fat one. Both Mr. and Mrs. Evans seemed pretty uncomfortable, and looked at us with gratitude when we walked in.

Lily, always polite, managed to regain some sense and asked, “Who is this, Petunia?” Petunia. So this was her sister, this bony woman.

Well, I could almost see the resemblance. She had Lily's high-cheek bones, but her skin was so drawn, it made her face seem skeletal. Her hair was light, like the rest of the Evans, and she had the pale completion.

Otherwise, this woman wasn't nearly so pretty.

“This is Vernon. We met at the restaurant I work at, and we've been dating a little over a year. And he's my fiancé.” Petunia replied, briskly. Remembering the stories I had heard about Petunia and what she thought about our kind, I felt an instant dislike towards her. “And who is that?”

Lily drew herself up to full height, but as she was petite this wasn't really intimidating. However, her green eyes flashed, and that was enough to quiet her sister. “This is James Potter.”

“James Potter? That annoying, horrible, obnoxious, immature boy you rant on and on about every summer?” Her sister asked, ignoring the look of rage on Lily's face. Bad move. I would know.

“No. James Potter, the man I've been seriously dating for over a few months.” She replied with cold rage. Hearing her say that, though, installed both a warm feeling and a sense of panic. What did she mean seriously? What did her parents think she meant? What if they got the wrong impression? Or if-

But no. Both of them were smiling at me, apologetically, and Mrs. Evans was saying, “Why don't we go have dinner? Lily, dear, I believe you left it going without watching it. It may have boiled over.”

“Oh, no, mom.” Lily replied, a glint in her eye. “I've made sure that it doesn't boil over. I've put a-“

“She's taken it off of the stove. Right Lily?” Petunia butted in, sending Lily a warning look and appearing panicked. So Lily's sister hadn't told her boyfriend yet about our `abnormality.' Well, that would have to change.

Lily looked like she agreed, because she was about to say something about spelling dinner, but I cut in with, “Yeah, I'm hungry. Dinner sounds good.”

Both of the Evans sent me grateful looks again, and Lily pouted. “But James…” She whispered as we walked into the kitchen.

“I know, he deserves it. And she sure as hell deserves it. But not yet. We wait for the opportune moment.” I smiled maliciously. Yes, tonight would be interesting.

Remus-

“Let lightning strike me if I ever do this with Padfoot again.” I said, sipping on my drink. Both Peter and I were sitting at the bar, enjoying a drink, and watching Sirius flirt with nearly every girl within a five-foot radius.

“Yeah, I know.” Peter replied. “I don't know how we were talked into coming. All we have unloaded is our beds, and tonight we'll want to sleep when we get back. We should've unpacked.”

Both of us had been talked into coming by Sirius, who had insisted we enjoy our first night of freedom. I would be seeing my parents tomorrow, and Peter would be visiting his mother, so Sirius would be left at our new apartment unpacking. So he had somehow guilted us into coming.

“So, do you think very much will change? Now that we aren't all staying together, I mean?” Peter asked.

“Not really. James is going to be staying with us after he finishes up with Lily's parents. All of us are crammed into one tiny apartment. It'll be just like a dorm room, with less room. And someone will have to cook. But I mean, I think we'll see each other once a day, anyways. It's just like jobs we have separately instead of classes we have together.”

“And being fired instead of detention.” Peter finished. I smiled at him, agreeing silently.

I had always liked Peter. He was small, and kind of quiet, like me, and had a blunt way of saying what he meant. He had never, to my knowledge, hurt anyone, though he had liked to see people teased, perhaps because of how often he was teased. But I hadn't been paying him much attention lately, with Michelle and leaving school and everything.

“What've you been up to?” I asked, sipping the drink again.

“Nothing, really.” He squeaked. Then again, he is a little like his animal form. “I mean, I barely graduated. I was working on my grades most of the year.”

“You could've come to me.” I said, bothered that he hadn't. I felt a little like I had let him down. As a Marauder, I was always the one to help with exams, and homework, and essays.

“No. You're too smart.”

“Well, you could've gone to Prongs.” I added, feeling a little hurt at his last comment. Was it even possible to be too smart? Peter looked thoughtful, and I added, “I mean, I know he can act stupid, but all four of us know he's smart.”

“I know. But he didn't seem to have time, after his mother's death, and Lily… and Sirius wouldn't have helped me, you know that.” I did know that. I wouldn't have even suggested it. Sirius wasn't good for helping people who were worse at something than him. His ego was big enough; he didn't need people coming to him to improve it. Besides, he had trouble explaining the material in a sensible way, and trouble paying attention to the topic at hand, and trouble with…

Well, he had a lot of trouble with all of it. In fact, sometimes I think Padfoot got through school on luck.

“How're things with you and Cindy?” I asked, thinking back to who his new girlfriend was.

“We broke up.” He replied easily. “We didn't want to be serious with the long-distance relationship, and she still has a year of school to go through. It wouldn't have worked.”

“Ah.”

Neither of us really knew what to say after that. I mean, Peter and I were friends, but neither of us really had had much of a chance to talk, and things just seemed awkward.

Instead we watched as Sirius started talking to another girl. Her strange, strawberry blond hair caught the lights and her outfit was casual, like she hadn't been planning on coming here, and this was just where she had ended up. She seemed calm, and was standing on her own in the corner. She was so collected, and easy-going, and seemed the exact opposite of Sirius.

And Sirius, it was clear, was stuttering.

Smiling, I walked over to introduce myself. Maybe I would have to do this more often. It would be worth it to see Sirius Black lose his charm.

Lily-

Conversation dragged on at dinner that night, and I watched as James went from extremely uptight to easy-going and charming. I could tell even my sister had to love him. He was just too…funny. To sweet, too charming.

Mom had once said to kill James with kindness, and so I had tried it last year. I had tried being nice to him to get him to stop being cruel to other people. And most of the year, I had been able to keep it in mind, and not snap at him. I had even given him a chance, and not fought him on going on that first date.

And because I had tried being nice, I had ended up here. With James. And ridiculously, head-over-heels, in love.

It was quite odd, the sudden realization that I was in love. I wouldn't tell him yet, of course. I didn't want to scare him away, and he had seemed scared earlier, just by my saying that we were serious. But it was like something just hit me, and I had to stand still for a minute to thin about it.

Now it's the little things about him that get to me, ad I don't mean annoy me. The way he runs his hands through his hair when he's nervous or frustrated, the way he always has to push his silver-wire glasses up his nose, the way his smile's crooked… you get the picture, don't you?

He even charmed Vernon into a conversation about his new job. And Mum and Dad were wrapped around his finger.

After dinner, James offered to get the plates. I volunteered too, walking out of the dining room and into the separate kitchen, knowing exactly what he wanted, and wasn't surprised when he was waiting for me in the kitchen.

“He's so…fat.” James said, a look of mock-awe on his face. I snorted at the look, and found myself quietly laughing.

“Yes, he's very big. I know. But what are you doing being so…nice?” I asked. I didn't know how he could even handle it, let alone why he was doing it.

“I had to lull him into a false sense of security.”

“So that's how you got away with not being blamed with all of those pranks in first year? I was wondering why you didn't prank for so long.” I replied, stunned. They had made us all think we were safe, and then sprung a big one.

“Yup!” James seemed so amused; I wasn't about to stop him. “So how am I doing?” He asked, sneaking a peek out at my family.

“Wonderfully.” I replied, giving him a quick kiss. “Now hurry up, before they suspect us of doing anything more than talking.”

“But we were doing more than talking.” I gave him a look, and he explained, “We were plotting.”

AN- But what were they plotting, and who is Sirius's mystery girl? ;) Please review for me to continue!

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9. So How Was Your Weekend?

AN-You all want to kill me. You hate me. I understand that. And I wont try to excuse my actions, but I'm telling you not to give up on me, because soon this fic will be over, and you'll all have to mourn the loss of one of the strangest but funniest fics anyone's ever come up with. (I know, flattery, much?)

Disclaimer- J.K. is a genius.

Plot- Sirius tries to play muggle. Hilarity ensues.

Sirius-

I hate Remus. I blame it all on Remus. In fact, at the moment, I loathe Remus.

It's all because of what he said earlier that I'm acting like this! I mean, Kayla Bellaire isn't even my remotely my type. I normally go for blondes, but she has this amazing, strawberry-red color to her straight hair, cut too short to put up. Freckles marred her face, and adorned her arms. The only thing I really would've always liked about her was her bright blue eyes.

Her strange blue eyes were her most enduring quality. And I really couldn't meet them. It made me incapable of speech.

And since when did I start talking like Remus, all long words and stuff? And in my own head!

And Remus, you could tell, was enjoying every minute of this.

“I really have to go,” I mumbled, praying to every god I had ever heard of for Remus to play along. I didn't want to feel those eyes on me anymore.

“Oh.” Did she sound disappointed? I really hoped so! And suddenly I felt guilty for thinking like that.

“Uh…but you said you lived nearby! We should…er…that is, uh…have dinner sometime. I mean, if you want to.” Her smile lit up her face.

“Sounds great! See you around, Sirius Black!” She called to my back.

Remus walked silently next to me, and I wondered why he wasn't teasing until I noticed that he was shaking with barely suppressed laughter. Peter, who was next to Remus, was no longer bothering to suppress it.

“What? I wasn't that bad, and I'm not stuttering anymore!” I defended myself.

“But you will be soon, my friend.” Remus said, laughing. “You just asked her on a date. And you have her number, which means you have to call her. And…”

Here, it appears, my good friend couldn't speak anymore through his laughter. “And what?” I asked, irritated, as Remus clutched his stomach and fought tears, his face almost cracking from the smiling, clearly at the thought of something.

“Padfoot, she's a muggle girl. You're a pureblood.”

“PETER! I thought we decided a while ago that we were above that!” I said, outraged that that was what they were laughing at. Honestly, Remus should know better! He's a half-blood and a werewolf!

“It's not that, Padfoot.” Remus argued, regaining his breath while Peter muttered something indistinguishable because he had started up laughing again. “It's just, oh, Padfoot…do you even know how to use a telephone?”

Oh. I hadn't thought about that.

Lily-

“Dessert's been amazing, Mrs. Evans.” Vernon Dursley was saying through a mouthful of the pudding I had made.

“Actually, I was talking to you all of that time, I didn't have time to make it. Lily made it.” My mother corrected him, and I fought laughter at the look of amusement on James's face.

“Right. Well, we all agree that my sister did an excellent job at mixing a few things together for desert.” Petunia was saying, annoyed that her fiancé was doing such a poor job of impressing my parents.

I know James said to wait, and what he was planning made sense. But I couldn't resist this one jab at my abilities. “Yeah, but it wasn't just mixing a few things together! I mean, really, do you know how hard it is to spell dessert?”

Petunia looked stricken, but James smiled understanding where I was going with this. “Well, d-e-s-s-e-“

“Oh, shut it!” I said, but I was smiling at him as well. He cautiously gave me a warning look, and I knew to keep quiet. Something was coming.

And sure enough, something came. But not right then. Right then, we pretended to be normal people, and enjoyed every minute of it.

That night, however, we put all of our time into planning and practicing the spell that would be cast tomorrow, before going to bed. (Fully clothed, I might add. Honestly, people, get your heads out of the gutter! There is a fourteen-year-old writing this! Would you honestly think of me that way?)

Remus-

I felt bad for not visiting my parents, I really did. But this was just too much, and I knew it would be something to remember. There was no way I was missing this, not for the world.

“Sirius, a telephone isn't that complicated, honestly! All you do is dial the numbers on the paper here, with these. Got it?” I asked, amused.

“Got it.” Sirius said, sweating. Yes, Sirius Black was nervous, and it was wonderful! So do you see now why I couldn't have missed this?

Slowly, as though he were heading towards death, Sirius picked up the phone by the handle, (upside down until I corrected him,) and dialed the number, swallowing hard. A minute later, he frowned, until I heard a voice on the other end. His eyes widened, and the phone almost slipped from his hand as he said, “Uh, hey, Kayla?” weakly. “Hang on.”

He was looking around wildly, and I didn't know what for until he asked, “Where's her head?”

“What do you mean, where's her head?” I asked, completely confused. I hadn't mentioned her head anywhere, had I? I mean seeing Sirius nervous and upset was hilarious, but even I wasn't that mean.

“Her head? I mean, it isn't in the fire. You said that this was just like floo.” Sirius said, and I opened my mouth, and then closed it, understanding.

“No, you can hear her voice. It's a method of communication. It's probably a good thing you can't see her face, because you wouldn't be able to speak if you could.”

“I can't speak anyways.” Sirius said honestly, and I was laughing again, until I said,

“Well, hurry up, before she gives up on you and hangs up.”

“She can do that?”

“PADFOOT!”

“Sorry.” Hand shaking, he took the phone in his other hand and wiped the first one carefully on his pants leg. “Right…uh, I was just calling `cause…”nervously he licked his lips and said in one breath, “Well, uh, would Friday work for you? I mean for dinner? Cause if not, I mean, it can find another day, but I-“

He quieted for a moment and I heard the other voice talking, and saw him staring at the phone wide-eyed before saying, “Sorry,” in embarrassment and hanging up.

“What?” I asked, as he carefully set the phone down.

“She said there was no Kayla there.” Sirius said. “I think we read her number wrong.” His face was bright red, and I had to fight back more laughter to ask,

“Then what was that other voice saying?”

“It was an older woman, and she said that Kayla was very lucky to have a young man like me in her life,” Sirius replied, turning, if possible, redder.

I couldn't help it. Knowing that I would be hit on the back of my head for it, I laughed. Hard.

“REMUS!” Whop. Yep, I knew somehow I'd get hit. “Reeeeeeeeeee.”

“Don't call me that. Now, dial another number. I think we mixed up the one for a seven.”

James-

It was three in the morning. Yes, you read correctly. Three in the bloody morning when I heard a loud, rattling knocking sound at the window, and turned groggily to see a large white owl bearing a letter.

So in a moment I was dressed and downstairs, about to apperate, after writing Lily a note to explain where I was.

But honestly. I mean, what sort of psychopath attacks a small village in Ireland, part muggle, part wiccan, (you know, the ones who want to be us,) at three-in-the-bloody-morning?

Apparently, Voldemort does. What was left of the town we entered was enough evidence of that.

Small buildings were still on fire, but no longer anything more than burning wood, the structure long since destroyed. Several Order members, but surprisingly not Sirius and Remus were carrying long, wooden planks…with bloody blankets over them…

Praying that soon I would wake up, I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and got to work, picking up what I could, helping those who needed it. I was no good for comforting, and I really couldn't handle the bodies, so I was left to control what remained of the fires, and try and count the missing, the dead, and the living.

I had never seen so much loss and suffering in my life.

“Potter, the Order members need to scan the area to try and find any leads as to where the Death Eaters may have gone to next. Open those bloody eyes of yours and help me out!”

It was going to be a very long night.

Sirius-

“Padfoot, there's certain things you'll have to avoid mentioning to this girl, if you want her to believe your act. You can't mention Quidditch, nothing about Hogwarts, mail comes in boxes and not by owl, and saying `Merlin' will only get you weird looks. Got it?”

No. “Yes.”

“Good. I'll be with you the entire time. You make a fool of yourself, which you are bound to do, and I'll cover for you. You say something wrong, which you are bound to do, and I'll say something that will make it look normal. And if I think the conversation's going bad, I'll change it. Okay?” Remus was handing me my coat as his own as we walked out of the house and onto the street.

“Thanks for the support, Moony.” I only use sarcasm when I'm truly nervous.

“Any time.”

It was then that I realized that I had no idea how we were getting to this fancy, inner-London restaurant. “How are we getting there?”

Proudly, Remus pulled a small key from his pocket, and placed the key into the lock of a rusted, beat-up tin can I knew from muggles in London was called a car, opening the door and shooing me in, proudly explaining that this was a perfectly normal method of muggle transportation, and ignoring my protests. “I can't pick her up in this!”

“You'll have to. There's no way the two of you are walking there. And if you are, feel free to, but I'm driving.”

Kayla didn't seem to upset by the method of transportation, just amused by it. She climbed in, trying to avoid hitting her head on the roof of the loud `car', and asked me several questions about myself that I hadn't been ready to answer. “So who are you living with,” “what school did you go to?” “You going to collage?”

Who knew being a muggle could be so difficult?

“So Kayla, are you into sports?” I asked, trying to remember what I had heard about muggle sports.

She shook her head though, to my great disappointment, and replied, “not really. I guess I like watching them, and if I need to I can play a little football, (Remember, that's soccer,) but otherwise, I do other stuff.”

“Like what?” Remus asked politely, and I had to curse him for coming. I was fine on my own, and it was my date!

“Writing, drawing, reading. I more of an artist,” she replied easily, setting the napkin on her lap as we sat down at the table. I glance at Remus to make sure that this was what I was supposed to do, and then copied her. Maybe I do need Remus's help after all. I wasn't raised like this.

“Poetry?”

“A little. More of songs. Piano, guitar, and vocal.”

Things were moving smoothly. We had already ordered our meals, and conversation was easy, and light, and I hadn't messed up once. The salads had just come as Kayla's eyes lit up, and she went down a little lower in her seat, saying,

“Would you look at them?”

Lucius Malfoy, Bella, my cousin, and Nott, all of whom I was sure were Death Eaters, stood there in the doorway. Would someone cut me some slack?

But even my family couldn't mess this date up. Things had to go perfectly.

“They're wearing capes and everything, even in here! I wonder what they're here doing.”

Yeah, I wondered too.

I gave Remus a look, saying, “Some people just dress like that to be a formal, I guess. They're probably here on business. Remus, would you be kind enough to see what business my family has here?”

Taking the hint, Remus left me to the mercy of Kayla, who said, “Oh, are they your family? We should invite them over, or at least say hello, don't you think?”

She wasn't being perky or anything. It was almost like she knew I wouldn't want to, and wanted to see me in an uncomfortable position. “No.” I replied shortly.

“Why not? Are they your parents?” she had stopped slipping her soup to look at me with curiosity.

“No. Two of them are cousins.”

“Then why not invite them over?” She asked, starting to get a little annoyed.

“Because I haven't talked to that group in years. They aren't the best bunch of people, and I'd really not want you to meet them and think that I'm like them, because I'm not.” I replied, saying more around her than I had originally thought I could.

Sighing, she nodded, clearly not understanding, but not wanting to argue with me.

If asked to recall the conversation, I wouldn't have been able to recall most of what she said, but I know what I said nearly the rest of the night. “Yeah,” yup,” and “uh-huh,” where about the only things I could say. I only made a fool of myself a few times, including times where I said an common muggle food wrong, and the waitress and my date looked at me strangely. Then I nearly spit out the `wine', not used to it being so watery, (I can imagine wizards drinking strong drinks, after how strong many people have suggested firewhiskey is.) and I became confused with quite a few of the muggle sports she brought up. It was amazing how many muggle sports there were, when we really only had Quidditch. And what are the “Olympics”?

She dealt with it all though, and even thought I was funny for it, and I was really beginning to enjoy her company, her smile, her laugh…

And then I caught James's eye.

James-

“Don't you think so, James?” Lily was asking, but I wasn't really paying her any attention, mine caught by Sirius, and the sight of him sitting awkwardly in muggle clothing next to a redhead.

And as stupid as this one's going to sound, my first thought wasn't `why is Sirius is a muggle restaurant?' `Who is Sirius with?” or even `this is so funny, watching Padfoot try to play the muggle.' No, my first though was, `wow, I thought Sirius went for blondes.'

My next thought was, `Lily's mine!' My third was `Wow, that was stupid, of course Lily's mine, Sirius and Lily wouldn't do that to me'. And then we went into the funny thoughts above.

“James?” Lily asked, waving her hand in front of my eyes. “James…” She was saying it in a singsong voice, teasingly, so I knew I had been out of it for a while before turning back to the conversation.

“What?”

“Oh, honestly, James, were you paying any attention?” Lily asked in disgust.

“Yes!” I said defensively, until I saw her look, and the Evans's smiling, and replied with, “Well, not really.”

“I was just saying how honorable our code is.” Lily replied.

“Oh, yeah. The rules at Hogwarts are about as old as the school itself. And as the school was built centuries ago, that should say something to you.”

Lily's parents gave an appreciative chuckle, and Lily went on to say something else, but already I was zoned out again. The lack of sleep and boring conversation was making me drowsy, and since Lily's parents had taken us out, it really wasn't going to look good if I left. But I wanted to know what Sirius and Remus were doing here badly. Very badly.

When Vernon started talking, (to Petunia's parents, not to Lily or I,) Lily hissed, from next to me, “What's wrong with you?”

Grinning, I pointed to Sirius subtly, who, to my personal amusement, (and from what I could see, Remus's too,) had turned bright red at something the girl sitting with them had said.

“Oh my…” Lily drifted off, grinning, the giggling. “I do believe the smooth Sirius Black is stuttering.” Biting her lower lip, she watched them for a moment more, until the smile seemed to melt, and a slight frown made it's way onto her lips. “What's Remus doing?”

Curiosity held me, and eventually, when I could take Vernon's talk of golf no longer, I stood, stretched, and explained that I was going to use the restroom, meeting Vernon's smug look with a glare I think could've rivaled McGonagall's. (I would know, she's glared at us quite a few times.)Praying that Remus, who was giving me meaningful looks, would get the message, I walked quickly towards the bathroom, vowing along the way that, in these times of danger, I would create a better method of communication. Sirius and I had two-way mirrors we sometimes used, but it needed to be something that all of the Marauders could talk to each other with, and easy to carry and conceal. I'd have to talk to Lils about this one.

“What's going on?” I asked Remus, as soon as we were safely inside. Swiftly checking everywhere with magic to try to determine if anyone was listening in, I nodded my head to confirm that it was safe to speak.

“Two of Sirius's cousins and an old school friend are here.” Remus replied carefully, speaking in code just in case. We weren't really advanced, and while we knew how to keep people at Hogwarts from over-hearing us, we hadn't really ever had to hide ourselves from more advanced wizards.

“One of Sirius's old school friends, or one of his cousin's old school friends?” I asked, knowing it would make a difference, and surprised at how official and mature I sounded.

“It's Nott, Malfoy, and Bella.” Remus said, rubbing his palm over his face, his eyes shut. Running a hand through his hair in frustration, he said, “Sirius and I happen to be here for Sirius's muggle date, and we both saw them.”

“So have Sirius take his date someplace else.” I replied logically, but knew as soon as Remus gave me that look that it had been the wrong answer.

“This isn't about Sirius's date, I happen to think that it's coincidence that they're here at the same time as us.”

“Good type of coincidence, or bad?” I asked, praying for the former.

“That would depend on how fast we can call up Dumbledore.”

“We can't call Dumbles unless it's a real emergency.” I replied, feeling uneasy. But three Death Eaters my age or only a little older shouldn't be a problem, right?

“James, do use your common sense. Three Death Eaters only stay in muggle area if they plan to kill. This is probably some sort of test for them, to see if they're worthy of being Death-Eaters.” Remus's sharp reply made me realize something rather disturbing.

“Lily! She's out there, waiting for me, with her parents!” If Remus was right, and he usually was, Lily was in danger.

I didn't bother to say anything more to Remus, but I think he understood.

Sirius-

Nervously, I noted that James had come rushing out of the bathroom, while a moment later Remus came striding out, saying, “We've got to go. Now.”

The steely tone of his voice didn't leave room for discussion, and I stood quickly, pulling my coat off of the back of the chair and pulling it on, before hurrying to help Kayla into her flattering little coat, one that wouldn't keep her warm, but didn't need to. The summer air would be a little nippy, because of where we were in England, but we would need to wait this one out. They might need my help.

While we tried to make some sort of lie to use on Kayla, who was way to smart, (and too beautiful,) for her own good.

And suddenly, surprise surprise, the lights that kept the city we were in glowing, (I think the eklektrikity is more magical than anything we've come up with. I mean, how does it glow?) went out, throwing everything into darkness.

So I did the only thin I could think of in my panic. I pulled out my wand.

Remus, and James did the same thing, all of us performing a Lumos charm. I heard Kayla gasp, but didn't turn around. It wasn't that I wasn't worried for her, because I was. I was incredibly worried about her.

But I couldn't turn around. People were dying in front of me. And Bella was heading towards some muggle that had guards around him, dying by the moment, all of them unable to properly defend him.

Weaving my way through the masses, I made my way over to the frightened man, who was holding a thin, small woman quite tightly, as though she could protect him. I know I should have made my move stealthily, because then Bella couldn't have turned a curse on me, but I was I Gryffindor, not Slytherin, and anger at the lives lost, and Bella, and how many other things along with my date with Kayla my family had ruined made me fire the first curse that came to mind, a shadow-trap curse, at my cousin.

It didn't take anything more than that to capture her attention. It only took her a moment to shatter the shadow that had trapped her in a dome shape, and she walked towards me menacingly, showing a surprising amount of power. When had Bella gotten so strong?

Eventually, we were so into the battle with each other, we forgot about the one raging around us. I didn't know how to react to seeing Bella so strong, so I dodged most of the curses and jinxes just barely, but wouldn't let her taunting hurt my pride, and demanded, “Is that the best you can do?”

I haven't seen her so angry with anyone since Narcissa broke the head off of her stone statue of herself at the age of six.

But before she could murder me, a spell struck her from behind. Bella fell, knocked unconscious, and behind her stood Kayla.

“Right…so you're one of us too?”

“Salem Institute of Witchcraft and Wizardry.”

“Hogwarts.” I replied, a little shocked. I mean, I was slightly pleased that she was one of us, but it also somehow disappointed me. I had been so sure she had been a muggle…

“I grew up with muggle parents.” It was a little like she read my mind. I didn't even know her that well, and already she knew what lines I was thinking along. I suppose that was what I saw and liked about her.

“Of course.” I replied, still slightly dazed, but feeling a little better.

“Sirius come over here, you lazy oaf, and help me clean this mess of plaster up!” Remus called, steering me away from a confusing situation. Thankfully, I looked at him, and started cleaning, but not before looking back to where Kayla had stood and not seeing her there.

Cleaning up took only a few moments, and James, Remus and I were informed of the next Order meeting, and when it would take place. All three of us slumped into a bed, as Peter looked up, asking us what had happened.

None of us replied at first, until James looked at Remus to tell the story. Knowing I would agree with James, Remus reiterated the whole thing to Remus. As they talked, James broke the exhausted silence between us, asking, “So how was your weekend?”

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