The Bewitchment of James Potter

V-Elentari

Rating: PG13
Genres: Drama, Romance
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 5
Published: 22/06/2004
Last Updated: 22/06/2004
Status: in_progress

Lily's life is a mess. James was her support, but when she left, James learns it went both ways. Ch1 - a teary farewell. Ch9 - James begins a rescue mission to recover his love, who, unbeknownst to him, belongs to another. Lily is forced to remember their past together.

Chapters

1. The Train Station Farewell

1. The Train Station Farewell

The Bewitchment of James Potter

DISCLAIMER: *Luna-E bursts into tears* I wish I owned it. *dabbs at her eyes with a hanky* I really do! *sniff* but Lily, James, and all included belongs to the one, the only, the awesome, J K Rowling.

Yeess, I am The Weirdo. Anyway, about the story… it starts out during (well, at the end, as you’ll soon see) of Lily and James seventh year… then goes mega fast-forward to five years later… who they are then, what they’ll be… you’ll have to see! Not your typical J/L story, there is an exterior plot in this, although the beginning is sad, angsty, romantic, etc, there will be humor, action, drama, and a whole lot more!

And about the character’s looks: I did them as closely to the HP books as I could.

W/o further ado:

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Chapter One: The Train Station Farewell

A petite teenage girl dressed in long black robes and a thin black cloak, her face hidden in the shadows of a low-drawn hood, stood on the outdoor platform of Hogsmeade Train Station. The platform was almost empty; the only people there were waiting for a different train; this one was a special train scheduled for the passage of a single passenger.

The gray sky began to drizzle.

"What an omen." She murmured, pulling her cloak closer around her as she shivered. I should have worn a thicker cloak, she reprimanded herself.

RWWWWWWWAAAAAOOOOOOOOOO

A long sleek black train pulled into the station. No passengers exited – it was a special train, and the signboard placed above it was blank, the destination.

"I guess that’s my cue to go." She said quietly. Her cheeks flushed as she tried to lift her heavy bags. As she kept struggling, a lock of auburn hair became loose and fell across her face.

"Lily!" a male voice cried.

Lily looked up to see a tall, raven-haired boy running towards her, his robes flapping behind him. He rushed right up to her, a look of profound concern in his warm hazel eyes.

She turned her head away so that the boy couldn’t see the tears forming in her eyes.

"Lily?" James asked, grabbing her arm. "Look at me."

She reluctantly turned back to him, but kept her eyes down, her face still in shadows under the hood. James fingered the top of it. "May I?" he asked softly. She only nodded in response.

James gently pushed the hood off her head, revealing thick, shoulder-length auburn hair that fell in gentle waves, the dark red color contrasting with her pale ivory skin. He brushed the loose tendrils behind her ears and looked in to her eyes – a strikingly brilliant emerald-green.

Normally of a flawless complexion, the green eyes that were staring out at James were bloodshot, with dark hollow circles underneath. Her face was blotchy from her tears; her whole body appeared stressed. Over all, there was the haunting look of profound grief.

To James, Lily was the most beautiful and wonderful girl he had ever met, and it wrenched his heart out to see her like this and not be able to make her feel better.

He held her close to him and hugged her slender body. "I’m really sorry about your parents, Lily." he whispered into her ears.

Lily broke down. Her lower lip trembled, and her emerald eyes became clearer and shone brighter as more tears came and over flowed. Her shoulders sagged in as if the weight of the world was upon her small frame.

"Oh James!" she managed to moan out, letting herself lean into him.

He tightened his arms around her and held her. He inhaled the sweet scent of morning and touched her soft hair. How tiny she always seems in my arms.

He tried whispering words of condolence. "Everything will be fine..." he murmured softly.

Lily recoiled as if slapped, pushing James away. "Don’t you get it? They’re dead! Nothing is fine, nothing!"

James’ expression became somber, his clear hazel eyes widened in concern. "Please Lily, I’m sorry! I just don’t know what to say anymore."

"There’s nothing to say." she said, turning away in anguish.

"Lily, I..." James began.

"What?" she snapped, then hated herself for doing so.

James’s voice faltered. "I... I... I don’t understand why you have to leave England... can’t you just do your higher education here?"

Lily’s eyes dropped. "James we’ve been through this..."

"Not we haven’t. Not really." He said, his eyes pleading.

"James, I just can’t stay here... I need to get my life back together... but I can’t stay here in Britain!” she whispered, her eyes pleading for him to understand. “I was offered a full scholarship at Beauxbaton’s university, the Joan of Arc Center for Advanced Magical Learning. I can’t pass this opportunity up!" she said, praying that he could fully comprehend her need to get away.

"But why do you have to leave now? There’s still a week till the End of Year Feast."

Lily avoided his gaze. Please don’t let him make it any harder than it is! "I c-can’t stay here!" she said, biting her lower lip. "I just c-can’t!"

James blinked back the tears that were threatening to form in his eyes. "I’m going to miss you so much."

"I know." She answered quietly, brushing away the tears that were sliding down her cheeks.

"No, you don’t. You have no idea how much." He said, his eyes narrowing.

Lily looked up at him from under sooty lashes, her eyes confused. "What do you mean?” she said, shivering as the drizzle increased.

"Damn it, you’re getting wet." James said, taking off his cloak and draping it over her shoulders. "The last thing you need right now is pneumonia."

Lily struggled to remove the cloak. "It’s really sweet of you, but my train is leaving soon anyway..." her voice trailed off as James firmly placed it back on and fixed the gold fastenings. “James, I really don’t need it...”

"Keep it." he said hoarsely.

Lily eyed the gold fastenings. "James, it must have cost a for- "

"Keep it." He repeated with more force. Why didn’t I get her a suitable good-bye present? Probably because I was hoping she’d stay...

Lily knew it was pointless to refuse. Plus, James looks so sad... at least I could accept his cloak.

She watched as a tear rolled down his cheek. James never cries! Lily thought, her eyes widening.

James immediately raised a hand to brush the tear off, but Lily caught the hand before he could do so.

Their eyes locked.

She stared into the depths of his firelight hazel eyes, absorbing their warmth.

He could not have ripped his eyes from hers, his emotions were reflected in their brilliance.

They were both crying.

"Oh James, it’s not like I’m the only one leaving!" Lily said, breaking the silence.

"But I’m staying on as Dumbledore’s apprentice. And then it’s on to the Auror Academy. You’re going to France."

"It’s only for a few years." Lily began, and then froze.

The word ‘years’ hit them both like deadweight.

Years. James thought, his head beginning to pound, his heart beginning to break at the sound of the word’s cruelty. Years without Lily. How can that happen? I’ve liked her for so long, but didn’t know how to show it. We acted like we hated each other…but this year was incredible, she liked me back! And we spent so much time together and became so close - reaching the point where we could speak without having to say a word. How can I spend years apart from the person who has my heart and owns my soul? Please don’t go!

Years. It hit Lily right in the chest, knocking the breath out of her. Can I live for years alone without family and friends? Can I survive years without James? I despised him for so long… but then I realized that I had also been scared of caring so much for him. And now… he’s my support and foundation… And the person I secretly love more than and beyond any other being? Should I tell him the truth? Can I tell him?

The train whistled again.

Lily glanced at her watch. " It’s time."

She tried to pick up her trunk, but again, it was too heavy. Before she even asked, James, always the gentleman, brushed her aside. "Let me get that." He said, easily hoisting the trunk up to his shoulder and securing it into the baggage compartment. "Are you all set?" he asked, "Are you sure you have everything?"

Lily looked at him. Do I dare?

The brave Gryffindor stirred up inside her. "No, not everything." She said.

"What’s that? What are you missing?" James said, puzzled at how calm Lily looked at forgetting something.

"You."

James heart began to pound, uncertain that he was hearing correctly, but daring to hope. "W-What?"

"I… I think love you, James." she said.

"Oh, Lily! Please stay here, with me." He cried, his arms wrapping around her trembling figure.

Lily buried her face in his chest, her forehead resting in the way she had many times during the years. As she inhaled his familiar scent, she thought of the many times when she had been held here, the one place where, during the rare occasion that she felt vulnerable, could be safe and protected from everything in the outside world. Tears sprung from her eyes. "I can’t, I can’t" she repeated, mumbling into the robes.

"You can!" James said.

"How can I?" she whispered miserably. "There’s nothing for me here."

James moved her away from the hug and held her at arm’s length. He traced her soft cheek with his index finger tenderly, savoring her skin’s softness.

"Marry me." He whispered barely above the sound of the wind.

"What?" Lily said, her eyes widening.

James blushed, the boyish blush that was cute and so James at the same time. "S-Sorry... I mean, will you marry me?"

Lily stood frozen to the ground. It seemed like all her dreams could come true... James, James, JAMES! Say YES! her heart screamed. But Lily was Lily, and she listened to her brain, not her heart. She hung her head. "James, you don’t want to marry me..." she said, dropping her eyes.

"Don’t I?" James said, his eyes boring holes into Lily’s soul. "I have wanted to ever since I realized..."

"Realized what, James? Lily asked miserably.

James straightened up. He put one arm around Lily’s waist and drew her near to him. He held her chin with the tips of his finger of the other hand. "Lily."

"James?"

"I love you."

Lily stood there mesmerized and totally petrified.

"I’ve loved you since we first met, you made me believe in love at first sight. I didn’t think it was possible, but it is. And Merlin help me, I won’t be able to take it if you leave!" He said, his voice cracking at the end. "I didn’t want to love you, and it took me years to finally realize that I did… I denied had denied it to myself, and when I realized it, instead of telling you, all I did was be an ass... but now I don’t care about all that. The only thing I care about is you. I want to marry you."

Lily broke away. "James, I... I can’t marry you."

James pulled back. Lily felt her soul wrench and she saw his hurt eyes fill with tears. He shivered and hunched. He breathed in slowly. "Why not?" he whispered, barely audibly.

"Goodbye James." Lily whispered sadly.

In a daze, she headed toward the train. She handed her ticket to the conductor and boarded, choosing a window seat. She looked out at James, who was still standing there, his tall muscular build hunched over in deep heartbreak. She noticed that he was whispering some sort of spell or incantation.

Something white fluttered out of his hand. It soared right towards her. She quickly opened the window, and the object landed in her lap. She looked down, and saw a flower - a simple, pure white lily. The drizzle had even left little drops of water on it.

She found a note pinned to the stem. She unfolded it, her hands trembling. She reread it twice before she understood.

Lily,

Keep the Lily to remember that I love you and I always will. Just You.

Please don’t forget me.

-James

PS. Will we meet again?

Lily opened the window and looked back at the tall dark-haired figure. "James!" she yelled.

He straightened up and looked at her window to see her red hair flying out in the wind, her face tearstained. He hurried toward her.

"I won’t forget!" she finished in a loud, wobbly voice. She reached her hand out, and James tried to touch it, but they only brushed each other by. "We’ll see each other again, but don’t come find me!"

The train’s engine started up. James face contorted in a mix of anguish and sorrow. "Lily!" he yelled back.

The train began to chug forward slowly.

"Promise you won’t come find me!"

"I’ll promise anything! But Lily, no! Please don’t leave!" He yelled, running beside the tracks, catching up to Lily’s window. "Lily!"

"James!" she yelled back, "What are you doing, you’ll get run over!"

The train picked up speed.

"Lily!" James yelled, trying to keep up, but the train was going too fast. "Lily!"

He came panting to a halt. Lily looked back and the last image that she had of James was him standing on the side of the tracks, staring after her, his body getting smaller and smaller in the distance until he was just a small dark figure in the distance as her train moved farther and farther away.

Finally, he disappeared from her view completely as the train turned a corner.

"Lily..." James moaned quietly after the train.

He stood at the end of the station, the wind blowing so hard his robes were flapping around behind him. James bent his head in a prayer. Please let her be safe. Please let me see her again.

A tear rolled down his cheek. James didn’t even bother to brush it off.

It was as if the sky heard him and felt his grief; the heavens opened and rain began to fall like a curtain of heavy gray tears.

Even though he was shivering in his robes, his warm cloak gone, and was beginning to get soaked through, he remained there at the train station, staring at the Horizon.

"James!"

James spun around to glare at the person who dared to break his concentration, having instantly recognized the voice. It was the last person he wanted to face right now.

A tall dark figure with long black hair wearing standard Hogwarts black robes and a cloak was rushing towards him.

Sirius Black.

"James, what the hell are you doing out here in the rain?"

James ignored him, and stared back at the direction the train had disappeared from.

But Sirius wasn’t about to let himself be ignored. He gave James a light shove. "Damn it James! She’s left already, and there’s nothing you can do about it. Let’s just go back to the castle.”

Rainwater was dripping down James’s nose. "Leave me alone." he said stubbornly, setting his jaw as he attempted to walk away from Sirius.

Sirius grabbed James’s shoulder. "I don’t mean to be cruel! Hell, I’m your best friend; I’m just trying to be honest."

James turned to face Sirius.

Black could barely recognize his best friend’s face. His velvet brown eyes were grief-racked, so hurt and so vulnerable that Sirius was at a loss for words.

"Look at me Sirius, I’m a wreck. I don’t want to be without her. I need her. Can’t you understand that?"

"Listen to me! I know you love her, and she loves you, I saw it! But bloody hell mate, she’s gone."

James began storming away from him.

Again, Sirius grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. "James, get a grip! You have to face it! She’s gone, and you need to move on. You have to focus on this summer. Auror school, remember? The one thing you’ve always wanted, special training from Dumbledore himself!"

"I don’t care!" James said, pushing Sirius away. "I don’t want it anymore! I don’t want anything but her!"

Black grabbed James by the shoulders and shook him. "Well, you can’t have her!"

BAM

James punched Sirius on the jawbone. Sirius staggered back clutching his jaw. "You can punch me all you want, but that won’t bring her back to Hogwarts!"

James faltered, his shoulders sagging. "I know that."

"Then pull it together!" Sirius said, grabbing James and shaking him again.

James raised his arms and halfheartedly pushed Sirius away. "Leave me alone, man."

"You’re already alone enough."

James looked up at Sirius, his expression was so full of despair and anguish that Sirius cursed himself for saying it. The look of James face was burned into Sirius’s soul, never to be forgotten.

"Sirius… I love her."

Sirius pulled James into a hug. "I know, mate, I know."

"I love her…" James whispered again.

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FIVE YEARS LATER

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It was Midnight, on a cool October eve.

Special Auror James Potter woke up in a cold sweat, and bolted into a sitting position in his king-sized bed. He had just had to relive the worst day of his life in his dreams. The day Lily had left. It was a recurring nightmare.

"James?"

James looked to his left. Stretched out on the bed, dressed only in her thin night slip, was Jinah Cha Nhi.

His girlfriend.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" James asked, rolling out of bed to stand up. He bent down, picked his linen nightshirt up off the floor, and began buttoning it up.

"Don’t worry about it." Jinah answered softly. She yawned and stretched, her long jet black hair shimmering over the pillow. "Was it The Dream again?"

James pushed aside the feeling of annoyance which crept over him. James had never told Jinah what was in his dream, and so, she just wrote it off as The Dream, as if it was an annoying little “phase” he underwent every so often.

"Yeah. How did you know?"

Jinah sat up and gave James a fixed look. "Whenever you have it, you wake up panting and sweating, sometimes you cry out."

James bumped into the bed table. "I talk in my sleep?"

"Only one or two words." Jinah said smoothly.

"Which are?"

"‘Don’t leave!’ or ‘lily’. James, what is the dream about? Why do you have nightmares about flowers?"

A slight tremor ran down his back as he tied a robe around his waist. "Oh, they’re nothing, really." he said staring right into Jinah’s eyes. One of the first things James had been trained to do was lie. And sometimes, many times, it came in handy.

"If you say so, baby. Why don’t you come lie down and relax?" Jinah said, patting a spot next to her.

James shook his head. "No, I won’t be able to sleep again. I think I’ll just go sit out on the balcony."

Jinah lifted her legs off the bed, and set them on the floor to stand up. "Want company?" she said, walking over to James.

"No." His tone was cold and final.

"Oh, ok." Jinah said, a little let down.

James felt bad about treating her like that. Just because you had a nightmare doesn’t mean I can be rude.

"Hey, give me a kiss." He said, putting his arms around her waist. Her face brightened up, and she smiled at him.

"Oh I dunno James… a kiss? Hmm, sounds too expensive."

He tightened his grip around her waist and pulled her close to him. "Well, I think I can afford it."

He leaned in and kissed her.

"Mmm." She said, when he pulled away. "Thanks, hon."

"Anytime." James turned and opened the French doors that led out to the balcony. He breathed in the crisp night air and looked out to the sleepy country landscape.

Lily... where are you?

True to his promise to her, James hadn’t followed her to France. He had been tempted to, but Sirius, Remus, and Peter had all been against it. Even though they were his closest friends, the only thing that had really kept him from finding her was the promise James had made.

James regretted ever having made the damn promise.

When he had finished training at the Academy, and became a fully accredited Auror, he received an unsigned letter, but the handwriting was unmistakably recognizable.

James,

Congratulations!

Not only for graduating, but also for the High Honors. Sorry I couldn’t make it for the ceremony, but things are quite busy here. Well, I probably wouldn’t have gone anyway, though…I don’t think either of us could take it just yet.

Take care.

Please don’t write back.

It had been all James could do to not immediately use the Ministry’s resources to find out where she was and go to her… but the promise had steadied him and kept him on This side of the English Channel.

James stared at the sickle moon. He took in a deep breath, and imagined the scent of lilies.

Lily...

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