Night Is My Companion

Mara Jade Potter

Rating: PG
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 22/07/2004
Last Updated: 22/07/2004
Status: completed

Second Part in the Surfacing Series. Harry's thoughts about Hermione on his way to face Voldemort. Inspired by the song Possession.

Chapters

1. untitled

1. untitled

All usual disclaimers apply. This is Part Two of the Surfacing Series, based on Sarah McLachlan’s song “Possession”. Lyrics will follow...this is Harry’s POV.

Night Is My Companion

There I stand, staring at her, watching the tears drip from her cinnamon pools onto the damp ground, wishing I could run over and wipe them away. To hold her close to me, and breath in every part of her. Does she even know that she is my oxygen? That she is my angel in disguise, the most secret desire of my soul?

I stop and smile at her. My brown-eyed beauty, my intoxicating bookworm. And her chin trembles as I say, “I’ll come back to you, Hermione.” She nods slightly, but I can see she doesn’t understand. She thinks I mean that I’ll come back in one piece. I’ll come back the savior, the conqueror, the champion. That’s not it at all. And I want to explain it to her.

I mean I’ll come back to her and only her. To my darling, my angel, the keeper of all the pieces of this shattered heart. That, throughout so many betrayals, so many years of searching, I found the truth in her. In her sweet, soft smile, in her tender eyes, in her bushy curls. I found the truth of purpose of my life, not in some silly prediction, but in her. In her funny intellectual riddles, in her sweeping rhymes and spells. I found my stability in her symphonic voice, in her silly study schedules and ridiculous causes.

But I don’t. I know she’ll never be the one in my arms, she’ll never see me that way. And now is not the time to confess. I have a job to do.

So I walk away into the night, my companion, my only friend now. The wind blows and sings a song of solitude, a melody of unrivaled despair. I must go alone. I must face my destiny. And it is not the darkness that I mind, the night that is so comforting, so fitting for this battle. It is the morning light that I dread, when I shall have no more reasons to lie to her. I shall have no more reasons to save myself the pain of rejection that I’m so sure will come.

I walk until my muscles scream in agony and my feet blister and pop and ooze. I walk until my pulse has tripled and my legs quiver beneath me. I walk and all the while, I never go one moment without thinking of her face. I think of the curve of her jaw, the graceful arch of her neck. I think of her amber aura and her freckled nose. I recall her cheekbones and her earlobes and her eyebrows and her chin. And when I’ve recollected every detail so vividly that she could be standing next to me, I start all over again.

The brush scratches my arms and the insects swarm around my head, but I am lost inside of my waking dreams of her. I am not journeying through the woods on my way to possible death-- I am ravaging her pink mouth with my own, entangling our limbs and whispering loving words in her ear. Nothing stands between us here; there is no Dark Lord, no death, no destruction, no war. I am twisting my fingers in her hair, wrapping my arms about her waist, pressing my cheek against her head. And that is where I want to be forever. How could I be there forever and not be satisfied?

And suddenly, I’ve arrived. There are swirling cloaks and sinister masks, and men shouting and swearing and attacking. And I see my allies throwing curses and falling in battle and taking out those enemies that are not my destiny. But the whole time, I am thinking only of her, envisioning her in my mind. I am making my way to the evilest fixture of all, and then we are dueling. We are dodging in and out of the crowd, throwing curses and shields and hexes. And I am hearing her words.

‘Dodge here, Harry,’ she says, or ‘Throw this hex at him’ or ‘Don’t forget to wave your wand this way.’

And her words echo and resonate in the air, and they keep me alive. They keep me sane and in love and brave. And before I know what’s happened, I’m screaming a curse and my wand is flashing green and Voldemort is dead at my feet. And I look at him grimly and immediately turn around and start walking back to her.

And my allies are stunned, I can tell. Stunned that I do not rejoice or announce it or dance or cry. They are unable to realize what I’ve known for so long-- that the Dark Lord was merely one more obstacle blocking my real fate...Hermione. And now he is gone. Gone, and can keep me from her no longer.

And when the truth sinks in, I am laughing. I am laughing and shouting and running as fast as I can. I am no longer tired, I am no longer bitter, I am no longer misunderstood or alone. I am racing back to her. I am willing to risk my heart, my ego, my life, just to see her and hold her and kiss her so hard that I take her breath away. Even if only for that one instant, I know my life will be perfect then.

‘I’m coming back to you, love,’ I think. ‘I told you I would.’

And I keep running.

Author’s Notes: Lyrics to Possession

Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide

Voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time

And night is my companion

And solitude my guide

Would I spend forever here and not be satisfied

And I would be the one to hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I’ll take your breath away

And after I’d, wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes, dear

Through this world, I’ve stumbled

So many times betrayed

Trying to find an honest word

To find the truth enslaved

Oh, you speak to me in riddles

And you speak to me in rhymes

My body aches to breathe your breath

Your words keep me alive

And I would be the one to hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I’ll take your breath away

And after I’d wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes, dear

Into this night I wander

It’s morning that I dread

Another day of knowing

Of the path I fear to tread

Into the sea of waking dreams I follow without pride

‘Cause nothing stands between us here

And I won’t be denied

And I would be the one to hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I’ll take your breath away

And after I’d wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes...