Whiskey Lullaby

sarahmay

Rating: PG13
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 05/08/2004
Last Updated: 05/08/2004
Status: in_progress

Hermione stopped dead in the middle of the small kitchen. “HARRY!” Her scream echoed throughout the house. *Please R/R!*

Chapters

1. Whiskey Lullaby

1. Whiskey Lullaby

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor the song “Whiskey Lullaby” by Brad Paisley! Leave me alone…I'm living off of bread with cheese for crying out loud!

PLEASE TELL ME IF THIS SHOULD BE MORE THAN PG-13!!!

She put him out,

Like the burning end of a midnight cigarette.

She broke his heart.

He spent his whole life trying to forget.

“Hermione, could I talk to you for a minute?” Eighteen-year old Hermione Granger turned to her friend of seven years, Harry Potter, and nodded. “In private?” He added after a moment.

“Ron, I'll be right back,” Hermione told Ron, her other friend, before following Harry outside the Leaky Cauldron. “So, you wanted to tell me something?” Hermione asked.

“Er, yeah,” Harry replied, running a hand through his hair nervously.

“Is something the matter?” Hermione asked, fear rising within her.

“No! No, it's just kind of hard to say,” Harry replied, and Hermione let out the breath she was holding.

“Then what is it?”

“I just, well, you see. When I was fighting Voldemort, I prayed for something,” Harry began. “I swore that if I could just see your face again, I would never ask for anything else in my life, and here I am,” he finished, looking into her eyes. “I love you, Hermione.”

“No. Why, Harry? Why?” Hermione cried as tears started running down her face.

“Wh-What do you mean?” Harry asked, his heart sinking.

“Why didn't you say anything before you left? Even when you got back?” Hermione was yelling now.

“Because, I-I didn't want to hurt you, incase I never came back!” Harry yelled back at her.

“I would have rather been hurt, because guess what? You're too late!” Hermione sobbed.

“Too late?” Harry murmured.

“Yes, Harry; too late. Ron asked me out after you left, and this afternoon, he asked me to marry him,” Hermione told him regretfully.

“Oh,” Harry whispered. “Just forget everything I said then,” he added as he walked past her back into the bar.

“Hermione! There you are,” Ron exclaimed as Hermione walked back into the pub. “What's wrong with Harry? He just bought half of Tom's stock of fire whiskey and apparated out,” He asked worriedly.

“I don't know,” Hermione replied, her heart pounding.

“Oh, well, I'll just go check on him later,” Ron replied, putting an arm around her waist. “Is something wrong?” Ron asked, as Hermione grimaced.

“I just don't feel too well. I think I'm going to go home and sleep,” Hermione forced a smile at him.

“Okay, well, feel better,” Ron kissed her on the forehead before she apparated back to her place.

Hermione slumped against the nearest wall in her flat as sobs wracked her body.

xxx

We watched him drink his pain away

A little bit at a time.

But he never could get drunk enough

To get her off his mind.

Until the night...

“Harry?” Ron called out into the darkness of his friend's small house. “Harry?” He called again, but there was still no answer. He started walking towards Harry's bedroom, when he nearly tripped.

“Hey there Ronny boy. Whassa matter?” Harry slurred from the floor.

“Harry, what the hell is wrong with you? You never get pissed this bad,” Ron asked, bending down so he was eye-level with Harry.

“Wrong with me? Nothin', jus missed my whole life, `sal,” Harry muttered, and Ron noticed tears were streaming down his cheeks.

“Harry, I think you've had enough to drink,” Ron told him.

“'S the only way,” Harry murmured, taking another swig from the bottle in his hand.

“What's the only way?” Ron asked, more confused then he had been all day.

“To get her off my mind,” Harry replied. “I've loved her for `s long as I remem-remember,” he added.

“Who?” Ron asked.

“Doesn't matter, `s long as she's happy,” Harry sighed before passing out.

“Good god,” Ron muttered, before half carrying, half dragging Harry to his room. “Hope you feel better tomorrow,” he said to the sleeping form of his friend before apparating back to flat.

xxx

“Hermione, we need to do something. Harry's practically been drunk constantly for the past week!” Ron told Hermione frantically.

“Ron,” Hermione began.

“It's just not like him, I mean -”

“RON!” Hermione yelled, and he stopped rambling to look at her. “We need to talk.”

“About what?” Ron asked, confused.

“About, us,” Hermione replied, looking at her hands.

“What about us?” Ron asked, putting his guard up.

“It's not going to work,” Hermione said softly, looking up to meet his gaze.

“There's someone else isn't it?” Ron asked after a few minutes of silence.

“I'm sorry,” Hermione whispered as tears began to form in her eyes.

“I suppose I should have known. We weren't really meant to be anymore than friends were we?”

“No,” Hermione sighed, taking his hands in hers. “But I'll always love you,” she added, before standing and leaving his flat.

xxx

He put the bottle to his head and `poured' the trigger *

He finally drank away her memory.

Life is short

But this time it was bigger

Than the strength he had to get up off his knees.

We found him with his face down in the pillow.

With a note that says I'll love her till I die.

And when we buried him beneath the willow

The angels sang a whiskey lullaby.

La la la la la la la. La la la la la la la…

“Harry?” Hermione called out. “Harry? We need to talk.”

Silence.

“Harry, Ron and I, we're over,” Hermione smiled slightly.

Still there was only silence.

“Harry I -”

Hermione stopped dead in the middle of the small kitchen. “HARRY!” Her scream echoed throughout the house.

xxx

“May the Lord rest his soul; ashes to ashes, dust to dust,” the priest finished the prayer as the casket was lowered into the ground.

“C'mon, Hermione,” Ron whispered soothing, before leading her away from the marble marker in Harry's, well, Hermione's backyard. “Are you going to be okay?” He asked as they approached the door to Hermione new house.

“Yeah, I just want to go lie down,” Hermione lied.

“Okay, just call me if you need anything,” Ron replied, before joining his family to go back to the Burrow.

Hermione walked slowly down to the basement and then through a smaller door into a small room. She turned on the light and about a hundred bottles of alcohol came into view. She grabbed a few bottles off the nearest shelf and went to her bedroom.

She downed half the first bottle in one go, and cringed as the liquid burned her throat. After she finished the first bottle, the second was nothing…and neither was the third.

xxx

The rumors flew

But nobody knew how much she blamed herself.

For years and years

She tried to hide the whisky on her breath.

“Hello?” Hermione asked groggily into the telephone.

“Hermione, it's Ginny. I was just wondering if I could come over for a little bit,” Ginny said from the other line, her voice shaky.

“Sure,” Hermione mumbled, resting her head in her hands.

“I'll be over in a few minutes then,” Ginny replied before hanging up the phone.

Hermione hung up as well, while kneading her forehead with her hands. “Ugh,” she groaned, looking around her room. There were a few empty liquor bottles on the floor and one was sitting next to her on the bed. She quickly cleared away the bottles and then went into the living room just as Ginny apparated in.

“Hermione, were you sleeping?” Ginny asked, biting her lip nervously.

“Ugh, stop shouting. My head hurts,” Hermione moaned, sinking into the couch.

“Are you drunk?” Ginny asked suspiciously.

“No,” Hermione groaned, “I cried so much I gave myself a headache.”

“Oh,” Ginny replied slowly. “Let me get you some aspirin.” She returned after a few minutes and watched as Hermione took the pills and drank the entire glass of water.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Hermione asked, squeezing her eyes shut against the light.

“I miss him,” Ginny sighed, as tears welled up in her eyes.

“I miss him too, Gin,” Hermione replied, choking back a sob.

“People are saying that he did it because of a girl,” Ginny sighed.

“Who?” Hermione asked cautiously.

“Dunno. He never said,” Ginny replied. “I hope that whoever she is she know how much pain she is putting everyone else through,” she added savagely.

“I agree, they deserve to die,” Hermione sobbed.

“You're right, they do,” Ginny agreed as tears began streaming down her cheeks.

xxx

“How is she?” Ron asked as Ginny walked into the kitchen of the Burrow.

“Not so good,” Ginny, replied, plopping down in the seat next to him.

“I don't think anyone's doing very good,” Ron muttered, resting his face in

his hands.

“She just needs time,” Ginny sighed, “we all need time.”

xxx

She finally drank her pain away

A little at a time.

But she never could get drunk enough

To get him off her mind

Until the night...

“It doesn't hurt so much now, Harry,” Hermione hiccupped as she looked at the picture of Harry she was holding. “I never meant to hurt you. I was coming over when I found you to tell you that I loved you back and that I called it quits with Ron because I love you,” Hermione smiled, but a sob escaped from her lips.

“I miss you so much,” she cried. “You're the only one I ever loved. Your strength and courage. How much you loved your friends, even though no one ever loved you. But oh how I did,” Hermione moaned, tears falling freely now.

“I used to dream of marrying you, making love to you, having your children, growing old with you…dying with you,” Hermione sighed. “At least one of those things can come true.

“I love you, Harry.”

xxx

She put the bottle to her head and `poured' the trigger. *

And finally drank away his memory.

Life is short but this time it was bigger

Than the strength she had to get up off her knees.

We found her with her face down in the pillow.

Clinging to his picture for dear life.

We laid her next to him beneath the willow.

While the angels sang a whisky lullaby.

La la la la la la la. La la la la la la la…

* = The correct version of the song is “He/She put the bottle to his/her head and pulled the trigger”, but my friend and I are in denial and think that `poured' makes more sense! If you have a problem with that, that's your problem! I don't care!

Author's Note: Please review! It'll make me feel soooo much better…cause trust me, I don't feel good at all right now…evil back is forcing me to walk in like a 90 degree angle…hehe…anyways…reviews will make me feel better…inside! Kay, love ya all!!!

xoxo, Sarah May

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