Hot Witch in the City

Rock_candy

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 26/08/2004
Last Updated: 28/11/2004
Status: in_progress

Six years after graduating from Hogwarts, dating columnist Ginny Weasley and her best friends Hermione Granger, Luna Lovegood, and Julia Vaughn deal with relationships and everything that comes with them in the great city of London. Loosely based on the hit TV show “Sex and the City”.

Chapters

1. New Beginnings

2. Truth or Dare

1. New Beginnings

Disclaimer: First, I’m not JK Rowling, and I owe all the characters, except for Julia, to her. I own nothing related to Harry Potter, etc. Secondly, the basic plot and some characters in this story are loosely based on those in the HBO comedy series ‘Sex and the City” created by Daren Star. I am also in no way affiliated with the television show or anyone associated with its production.

A/N: Hey all! This is my first “published” fan fiction ever, so I’m very excited that you are reading it. I started writing this story over a year ago, and it is only now ready to be viewed by other’s eyes! This story brings together two of my favorite things: Sex and the City and Harry Potter. Hopefully there are some others of you out there with the same odd taste as me! Please tell me what you think.

**********

Ginny paced around her Noting Hill flat and thought about the events of the past few days. She thought getting her own column at “Witch Weekly” was the answer to all of her prayers. No longer would she have to write about gardening and report to a witch older than her great-grandmother. However, now that she had the chance to show off her glowing writing skills, she was at a loss for ideas.

She walked into her bedroom and fell onto her bed. Think Weasley! Think! Rubbing her temples, she remembered back to the moment when her boss told her that she would be replacing Thelma Rolling as the weekly dating columnist. She got butterflies in her stomach and felt like the sky was the limit for her new project. It was just like the feeling you get when you start a new relationship. You are floating on a cloud and can’t imagine what could ruin this wonderful new thing you’ve just found. Suddenly, it hit her.

Ginny raced into the living room and jumped over to the desk. Biting her nails, she tried to think of the perfect opening sentence.

*****

New relationships. There’s nothing better, is there?

*****

“I got it!” Ginny yelled to her friends at Mike’s Café the next morning, as she sat down next to Hermione in their favorite booth by the window.

“Oh my gosh! Are you serious?” Hermione grabbed Ginny’s hand in excitement.

“Yeah! Well, you know how we’re all been waiting for Thelma to leave for quite some time.”

“’Quite some time my ass! That woman got married six years ago! How long can a mother of two write about singles life in London?” Luna interjected. The girls gave her a slightly disapproving look while trying to suppress laughter.

“As I was saying,” Ginny continued, “Thelma finally switched to the Home and Garden department. Gus called me into his office yesterday morning and told me I was the next ‘Hot Witch in the City’ girl!”

“Well congratulations! I can’t think of anyone who deserves it more.” Jules smiled at her friend and took a sip of her tea.

“I have the perfect way to celebrate!” declared Luna. “Tonight I’m treating all of you to a fabulous dinner! There’s that new French place in Diagon Alley I’ve been dying to check out. The chef used to be the executive chef for Beauxbatons. People always said the food was amazing there.” She whipped out her date book and flipped it open. “How’s eight tonight for everyone?”

“Sorry I’ve got to take a rain check.” Hermione said, looking slightly agitated. ”Harry owled me this morning. It’s the fifteenth, and that means I have to go to a karaoke bar and make a complete fool of myself once again.”

“Why do you guys have this ridiculous ritual? Why don’t you just shag already and get past all this pretense?” Luna winked at Hermione and sipped on her white tea.

“We have the ritual because we would never get together if we didn’t! He’s gone all the time at away games, and I’m always wrapped up at work. If we didn’t have a plan, we’d never see each other. “ Hermione shot Luna a dangerous glare and continued. “Also, as you very well know, we won’t just ‘shag already’ because we are friends! I won’t ruin that no matter how badly all of you want us to.”

“Fine. I’ll drop it. I just want you to know that I feel you’re passing up the best sex of you life! Don’t blame me when you shrivel up and get stuck with one of those lame wizards who can’t even tell his wand from his magic stick, if you know what I mean.”

“Ok, ok.” Jules interrupted. “Can we drop all talk of ‘magic sticks’ until nightfall. I have to go deal with children in about an hour, and this is not the prepping I need.”

“Oh yeah! I forgot that you were meeting your new family today.” Ginny smiled faking enthusiasm. They all knew that Jules meeting new clients today meant endless ranting tonight about the snot-nose brats who had made her day a living hell by puling out every practical joke known to wizard kind. Today didn’t look promising, as she was going to be teaching Draco Malfoy’s children. Obviously, everyone was a little worried.

Jules glanced down at her watch and nearly jumped out of her seat. “Oh my god! It’s already eight-thirty. I have to go. Owl me about tonight, alright Luna?”

“Sure, sure. Later!” Luna yelled at Jules walked out the door and into a phone book to Apparate.

“I better get going too.” Hermione grabbed her briefcase and coffee and headed out the door.

“Tell Harry I said ‘Hi!’” Ginny yelled after her. Hermione nodded and was gone. Ginny turned to Luna and whispered, “By the way, how do you know Harry would be the best sex Hermione ever had?” Luna looked up, grinned, and winked.

*****

However, does anyone really know the best way to start one? Sure, there’s the ever-so-popular love at first sight bit, but everyone knows that most relationships have a few more bumps in the road.

*****

Jules walked up to the large brick townhouse and took a deep breath. She checked the address, climbed up the stairs, and rapped on the large golden doorknocker.

She heard small footsteps then a loud swishing sound. Suddenly the door flew open to reveal a small house elf in a very large burlap sack. It pointed its long brown finger to the left.

“Fifth door on the right.” it muttered, and then scampered off toward what appeared to be the kitchen. Jules walked down the hall slowly, her heels clicking as she walked along to marble floor. She took in the surroundings. It was nothing new. She had discovered that all the houses she taught at were pretty much the same. She never saw and rarely communicated with the parents, except for the occasional note as to how much the children could eat, or when they could play outside. She was always greeted by a house-elf with a frighteningly blank expression. (She never shared this tit-bit of information with Hermione, however) Last but not least, she always taught children who were unaware of how lucky they were, but at the same time, how unlucky. They never had any contact with other children, let alone their own parents. She always tired to help them prepare for the social scene at Hogwarts, but somehow, they always had problems adjusting. They also always seemed to have initial problems with her. They felt that their tutor was someone to be toyed and messed around with. She never got a break the first day. She had to work for their approval, but she was getting good at it.

Jules finally came to a large wooden door with children’s drawings taped to the outside. She stopped before going in, taking deep, calming breaths. Nerves had suddenly overwhelmed her. The weeks leading up to this day had been filled with mild fear over what the children would be like. She never had gotten on well with Draco, especially in her school days. He always made her look foolish at prefect meetings and tried to override her authority with other students, even though she was a year ahead of him. Luckily, they never had many classes together, as she was a Ravenclaw, as well. However, he never ceased making her Hogwarts days a little unbearable. Taking another deep breath, she got her nerves under control and reached for the doorknob. As the door opened, Julia saw something that almost made her fall backwards. She had prepared herself for chaos, for evil, ill-tempered brats. She had prepared for the worst. She could have never prepared for what met her eyes. The children, Draco Jr. and Bella, were sitting at desks on the far right wall. They were both writing furiously on what looked like work parchments. She walked over to them, as they glanced up to meet her eye. She bent down to their height and smiled.

“Hey guys. I’m Ms. Vaughn, but you can call me Ms. Julia, all right? I’m going to be your new tutor.” The children gave each other sideways glances then grinned back at her.

“Hi Ms. Julia!” they said together as they stood up, walked around their desks and gave her a hug. Jules almost fainted.

“What are you guys working on?” Julia walked them both back around to their seats and glanced at their parchments.

‘It’s homework out last tutor gave us. She told us to finish it before our new tutor came. We are so sorry we don’t have it done!” Draco Jr. cast his eyes down in shame while Bella broke down into tears. Julia couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Um…” She bit her lip and looked around the room. It was immaculate. There were shelves filled with colorful toys and elaborate gadgets, lined up in perfect rows. The large blue area rug that covered the hardwood floor was perfectly centered in the room and showed no sign of mistreatment. The walls were perfectly painted with stripes of blue and cream, and the children were perfectly dressed. There were no stains of any kind, anywhere. Julia had to remind herself to keep breathing. Where the hell am I? This isn’t right. These are not Draco Malfoy’s children!

*****

Meanwhile, in a far less perfect workplace, Hermione threw down the stack up books she was carrying and slumped into her chair. She was drained from all the research she was doing for her presentation. God I hate elections. She thought as she spun around to look at the clock. Why can’t they just keep the same government forever, then I won’t have to keep explaining who we are to them over and over and over. This was the third time Hermione had to make her presentation to the House of Commoners about the wizarding world since her appointment to the position of Muggle Liaison to the Minister of Magic. Suddenly a familiar white bird swung into her window.

“Hey Hedwig! What do you have there for me?” She took the letter off of his foot and carefully opened it up.

Krazy Karaoke. 9:15. Be there or be square.

She smiled, gave Hedwig a treat, and sent her off. Hermione grabbed her cloak and Apparated to her apartment. She figured she would still have time to freshen up before heading out for a night of humiliation.

*****

“Alright boys!” Luna shouted to the line of workers in front of her “We have two days until the opening and I want this place to shine!” She walked over to the bar, jumped up on the counter, and watched as the men scurried around making last minute repairs on the building. Her lips formed a small grin as she thought about how she had gotten here.

Ever since her father had died 2 years earlier, Luna had been wondering what to do with all her inheritance money. She already had a steady paycheck from running “The Quibbler”, so she knew she wanted to put it towards something special. For months she had pondered how she would spend the money. Considering all of her interests, Luna finally came up with the idea of running a business. It hadn’t taken long to decide what kind of business she wanted after that.

Two months later, construction started on The Hex; a nightclub for wizards in their twenties and thirties. Luna had worked countless hours fixing up an old warehouse and turning it into a hopping club. Now the opening was less than forty-eight hours away, and she couldn’t wait.

*****

Meanwhile, Hermione walked into a far less hopping bar south of St. James preparing for what was to come. She wore her favorite party dress: red, strapless, cut just above the knee with a slit that came up a bit farther. As long as I’m out, I may as well attract some male attention.

Just then she spotted Harry at the bar. She waltzed over and did her best runway walk. Harry laughed, stood up, and grabbed Hermione’s hand. She spun around so he could get a good look at her.

“It’s been way too long, Ms. Granger.” He leaned in and gave her a huge hug.

“It certainly has Mr. Potter. My, my, have you been working out?” Her smile widened.

“Perhaps. Why? Are you jealous?”

“Of your manly muscles? Of course! I want to look just like you!” They instantly fell back into their rhythm and were completely comfortable with each other’s company. Hermione never realized how much she missed hanging out with Harry until he was back. “Well I just have to say that I blew off dinner with my girlfriends to be here, so we had better make this count.”

“You have girlfriends?” Harry mocked. “What happened to the days of our good old threesome: just you and the boys.”

“Me and the boys grew up! Besides, twenty-something woman need their girlfriends to talk about … well, girl stuff!”

“Fine. Fine. But just so you know, I am open any time to talk about your period! Then you wouldn’t need those ratty old girlfriends.”

“Harry!” Hermione blushed as she smacked him with her handbag. “See, this is why I need girlfriends!”

“Whatever you say.” Harry looked toward the stage, then back at Hermione. “Should I go sign us up to sing next?”

‘Whoa, whoa! Let’s wait a little bit. I need some alcohol in me before I make a fool of myself.”

“Ok, one drink, then it’s us on that stage!”

*****

Sure, once in a while, you get that perfect meeting. It lures you into a false security sometimes, however. You start feeling as if nothing could ever go wrong, and may even start to think that question no girl likes to admit she’s thinking, “Is he it? The person you’ve been searching for?”

*****

“Table for three please.” Ginny told the hostess as she looked over her shoulder, hoping to see her friends.

“That will be about 30 minutes.” the witch told her with a condescending air.

“I don’t think you understand. The newest sex columnist for Witch Weekly and the soon-to-be owner of the hottest wizard night club in London would like a table for three.” Ginny looked to her right and saw Luna decked out in her nighttime finest. What she didn’t see was Luna slipping the hostess five galleons.

“Right this way.” After grabbing three menus, she led them to a table near the back.

“Actually, I’m a dating columnist …” Ginny trailed off as the hostess left them to their table with an angry huff.

“See! One just has to know how to deal with these people.” Luna said, opening up her menu.

Ginny stood up to look for Jules. She spotted her coming in the door, but Jules didn’t look at all like expected. Her hair wasn’t frayed. Her clothes were in perfect condition, and she had a rather large grin on her face. Jules raced back to the table and gave her friends each a kiss on the cheek, then sat down.

“You are never going to believe the day I had!”

“Why? What happened?” Ginny said, preparing for the stream of complaints to come pouring out.

“I am now the tutor of the most well-mannered, well-behaved, cleanest, smartest kids in the entire world! It was like I was in an alternate universe. I don’t know what Draco did to those children, but it was almost scary. Their room was immaculate, and when I got there, they were doing homework. Homework! Can you believe that? I didn’t even find any dungbombs in the closet!”

“Is that a bad thing?” Luna said, chomping on a breadstick.

“I’m not sure.” Jules said, biting her lip. “I guess now that I think about it, it was a bit unnerving.” Ginny almost died.

“So now we complain when things are too good. What is wrong with us? You’ve just had the best start to a teacher/student relationship ever, and you still aren’t happy.”

“I don’t know what it is about them. It is just a little too freaky.”

*****

Other times, you start off horribly. You spill pumpkin juice on your dress, you say the wrong thing, and you embarrass yourself. This is not always the end of the road, though. I have seen too many compatible people cast each other aside by crying over spilled potion.

*****

Three hours, seven shots of tequila, four shots of vodka, a mudslide and a cocktail Harry found particularly humorous, (apply named “A Long Hard Comfortable Screw”) later, Hermione finally felt ambitious enough to get up on stage. Grabbing Harry by the arm, she stumbled over to the DJ.

“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea, Herm. You’ve had a lot to drink.” Harry tried to pull her back into a chair, but she wouldn’t budge. She turned around quickly, and fell against him. He almost lost his balance as well, having had a few drinks himself.

“Harwy,” Hermione slurred, while trying to stand up, “yer sush a good friend! Ya know what all my friends say we should do?” She put her hands behind his neck and arched backward. She almost fell over, but Harry caught her just in time. She started laughing hysterically. Harry couldn’t help but laugh a little himself. He hadn’t seen Hermione this drunk since the night after graduation from Hogwarts. However, if there was anyone who needed to get a little drunk now and then, it was Hermione.

“Maybe,” Harry whispered calmly, while trying to get her into the nearest chair, “we should get you home. I think you’ve had enough excitement for one night.”

“No!” Hermione stood up quickly but fell back down even faster. “I don’t want to be alone Harry! I’m really … um …” She motioned for him to get closer, then whispered in his ear, “Drunk!”

“I can tell, Herm. Now, let’s get out of here.” Harry chuckled, as he wrapped his arm around her body and hoisted her up so she could walk. He took her into the nearest bathroom, and they Apparated back to Hermione’s apartment.

Harry helped her back to the bedroom and changed her into her nightshirt.

“Thanksha bunch, Harwy. You know wha? I love you so mush, Harry! You’re my best friend. Did you know that?” She looked up him very seriously and then fell backwards onto her bed.

“I know, I know. I love you too. Now, I’m going to get you some water, ok?” Harry started to head to the kitchen, when Hermione grabbed his arm.

“Don’ go! I need you to stay with me.” She smiled and patted the bed beside her.

Eight Hours Later….

Hermione opened her eyes and was instantly blinded by the sunlight. All of the sudden, her head felt like it was going to explode. “Urrggg….” She rubbed her temples and rolled over to look at the clock. Eight-fifteen. Great, I’m already late for breakfast. She rolled over to face the window, and then she saw him.

*****

“Oh my god. Oh my god. OH MY GOD!” Hermione raced into the coffee shop, slammed her purse down on the table, and slid in next to Julia. She was shaking, had a pounding headache, and was still processing what she had just seen.

“Calm down. Deep breaths: in and out.” Ginny rubbed her hand and tried to act patient, while inside dying to know what had happened.

Hermione looked down at her hands and blinked a couple of times to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. “I think that I, um …” She looked up at her friends. No one was moving. “I … um, think that I slept with Harry.”

“Oh my god!”

“Are you serious”

“Was it hot?” Luna leaned forward, intrigued.

“I don’t know! I guess it was. The truth is that I don’t really remember! I just got completely smashed last night, and he took me home. Then this morning I woke up in bed with barely anything on and him beside me. What else could have happened?” Hermione leaned forward and covered her face with her hands. “Oh god, how could I have let this happen? What is he going to think of me?”

“Its all right sweetie. We all knew this would happen eventually.” Ginny cast the other two sideways glances. “Who knows? This could be the start of something great!”

“It could be the end of something great too.” Hermione took a sip of Ginny’s latte and wanted to cry.

*****

And sometimes new, great relationships start because of a brand new pair of shoes, which got me thinking: what is the best way to start a new relationship?

*****

Luna Lovegood invites you to

The Hex! Grand Opening Tonight!

The hottest new wizard nightclub in London

September 17, 9:00 PM

*****

Reporters surrounded Luna, but all she wanted was a stiff drink and to see her friends. She knew she had to be the gracious host, but what was the good of owning a club if you couldn’t party a little. “I’m sorry everyone,” she sighed, “but I’m going to have to give the rest of the interview later.” After shaking some hands, Luna headed toward the only redhead in the place. She went through the round of hugs and congratulations, and then let out a huge sigh. “I’m so glad you guys are here! Isn’t this fabulous!” They all nodded and smiled, knowing how proud Luna was. “Let me get you guys all drinks, on the house.”

“That’s ok.” Ginny said after spotting the cute bartender across the room. “I can get them! What does everybody want?” She asked looking straight past her friends, trying to get another good look at him. She had just purchased the most perfect pair of Prada pumps and had a little more bounce in her step tonight.

“None for me. Thanks. You know what happens when I get liquor in me.” Hermione said sarcastically, faking a smile. The truth was she was mortified about what had happened and nervous of the fact that she hadn’t heard from Harry since. She still wasn’t exactly sure what had happened, but Harry keeping quiet was making her suspect the worst.

“I’ll have a martini.” Julia said, checking her makeup.

“Cosmopolitan for me. Oh, and Ginny! His name is Josh.” Luna gave Ginny a little smirk as she walked off toward the bar.

“Excuse me!” Ginny rapped on the bar with her purse, waiting excitedly for Josh to come by.

“Yes, ma’am. What can I get for you tonight?”

“Can I have a Cosmopolitan and a martini for my friends, and a gin-n-tonic for me.”

“Really? I would have taken you for a vodka girl.” He smiled and started to mix a drink.

“Is that so? I can’t say that I’m too fond of vodka. Plus, gin has always had a special place in my heart.”

“Why’s that?” he asked.

She put out her hand and put on her most quirky grin. “My name’s Ginny.” She giggled a little.

Josh put the drinks on the counter and gave her a smile. “That has got to be the worst joke I have ever heard.”

“Thank you very much!”

“How long have you been peddling that one?”

“Oh, about 6 years.” They both laughed, and Josh forgot about everyone else at the bar, much to the dismay of his co-workers.

Back on the other side of the club, Hermione was sitting alone at a table watching Julia get a little crazy on the dance floor. Luna had left to finish her interviews, and was now talking to a group of twenty something guys on the second floor. Maybe I should have gotten that drink. She sighed and looked at her watch. It was only 11:15.

Hermione was about to get up and leave when she suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder. “Would you like to dance?” She was in no mood to deal with drunken guys slobbering all over her tonight. She was too depressed.

“Look. I’m really not in a good mood right now, and I don’t feel like acting like a perky little slut just so you can feel me up on the dance floor and have something to fantasize about all night. Ok?” She hadn’t meant to lash out. It wasn’t this guy’s fault that she was upset. She swung around to apologize when she found herself face to face with Harry. “Oh my god! I’m so sorry. I didn’t, or what I mean to say is, I wouldn’t have-“

“Hermione, I understand why you’re upset. Why don’t we go outside and talk? It’s a little more peaceful out there.” She nodded, still a little taken aback. Harry took her hand and led her out of the club. Once they were out on the street, Hermione only felt worse. She couldn’t look up into his eyes, or she knew she would start to cry. Suddenly she couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“Harry, I don’t know what to say about the other night. I don’t know what happened and I don’t know what we are going to do about it. I don’t know if this is going to ruin out friendship, but I don’t want it to. I’ve analyzed all the possibilities of what could have happened, and what each scenario would mean to our friendship, and none of them have good outcomes. I don’t want to lose you Harry, but we can’t pretend like whatever happened didn’t happen, even though I don’t even know what that is. “ She paused to take a breath and Harry laughed. All of the sudden, she was outraged. How could he be laughing about all of this? This was their friendship, their lives! “Harry! This is no time to laugh. This is serious -”

“I’m sorry, Hermione! It’s just … I don’t know. Sometimes you just surprise me and remind me why I love you so much. I mean, no one else would analyze various scenarios of what us having, or I guess not having, sex could do to our friendship and -“ He paused as he looked at Hermione’s now very surprised face.

“Wait. What did you just say?”

“About what? That you surprise me?”

“No, about … about you …” She couldn’t say it. She couldn’t believe what he had said. He couldn’t have said that, because it would mean too much. Sure they’d said it before, but for some reason it felt so different this time. Suddenly, she saw realization come to Harry’s face. He realized what he had said too.

“You mean … I mean … Wait. Did I just say I loved you?”

“Yes, I’m pretty sure you did.”

“Well, then I guess that’s one less thing I have to worry about doing later.”

“What are you talking about?” Hermione was worried about what was coming next.

“Ever since … well, since we, you know.” Hermione winced as she realized that they had done what she feared. “You know what I mean.” He took a deep breath and prepared to explain. “I guess I started to think about you in a different way. I always thought it would be weird when, or I guess, if we ever did that, but it wasn’t. I know you don’t remember, and I feel really bad that I sort of took advantage of you in the situation, but I wish you did remember. Hermione, it was so amazing. It just felt … I couldn’t explain it. It was just right.”

“Harry, I – “

“No. Let me finish. Well, after that, I got freaked out, as I now know you did. However, I came to the realization that I do, well … I do love you. There, I said it. I love you. I love you, Hermione Granger. I really do, and I’m a complete ass for not knowing that until now. Ok. So, I did it. The pressure is off me. I said it.” Harry let out a sigh of mild relief, and then instantly took on an air of complete terror. Hermione knew he was waiting for some kind of response, yet for once, she was at a loss for words.

“I have no idea how to respond to this.” Hermione looked up into his eyes, and suddenly felt something she couldn’t explain. It was like a veil was lifted from her eyes, and she could see clearly for the first time. She looked at Harry, and didn’t see the Harry she knew. She saw a new one: a Harry that loved her. He loves me. She thought to herself, trying to process everything he had just said. All of the sudden, she knew exactly what she had to do. “Actually, you know what? I do have a response to that.” Exactly two seconds later, she grabbed Harry’s neck, pulled him down to her, and kissed him. He’s right. This does feel right.

Back inside, Julia saw an open barstool and ran to it. She was exhausted from all the dancing and more than a little tipsy from all the martinis she was getting on the house. Josh looked up from talking to Ginny and half-heartedly asked her if she needed anything.

“No. No. I wouldn’t want to keep you.” Julia quipped, as she began rummaging through her purse looking for her lip balm. Then she noticed Draco Malfoy sit down beside her.

“Well, well, if it isn’t my new nanny. How were my children? Perfect little angels, aren’t they?”

Julia’s stomach fell a little at the sight of Draco. She was hoping to keep her distance from him for as long as possible. “First of all, I prefer the term tutor. I’m not there just to baby-sit. Secondly, yes, actually, they were quite, well, perfect.” Julia was getting irritated by the apparent disappearance of her lip balm and by the man sitting next to her.

“Well, I should hope they were perfect. I put a discipline charm on them so that they wouldn’t give you any trouble till I got you to sign my nice little binding contract. Now that you’re stuck with us for a year, you’ll be seeing the real Draco and Bella tomorrow. Good night!” Draco gave Jules a large sarcastic smile and stalked back over to his wife, who was sitting in a dark corner looking in a very large mirror and applying massive amounts of make-up. By the looks of her, she could have done with putting on a little more.

Julia could have killed him. She ran over to Ginny and tore her away from Josh. After she explained what Draco had told her, Ginny couldn’t help but laugh. “I guess it isn’t that much of a surprise. A man that vicious could never produce children that perfect. At least you don’t have to be freaked out anymore! You get to have the start that you had wanted.”

“I know, and I’m still bitching about it. We girls never are happy, are we?”

“I guess not. Now if you don’t mind, I have to get back to my cute bartender.” Ginny hiked up her dress slightly and sauntered back toward the bar. Jules ran to tell Luna good-bye, and then went home to ponder how her real relationship with the children would start.

*****

Ok, you got me. Trick question. As most of us already know, there really isn’t a “best way” to start a new relationship. However, we all know that no matter what happens, girls are never satisfied with the way events unravel. The truth is, however, that no matter how a relationship starts, it doesn’t define the whole relationship. After all, a great start could lead to disaster or even reveal a lie, and a horrible start could end up with the best sex of your life! No one really knows for sure, but we will all keep contemplating the possibilities until we are hoarse. That’s why I have this job of writing about it! As I continue to write this little article, I hope that we can share experiences and stories with each other. This is one new relationship that I hope will end as well as it is starting. Until next time, I’m hot witch in the city Ginny Weasley and you are now officially my new best friend.

*****

Ginny placed her quill on the table and looked down at her finished work. She couldn’t help but smile. She picked up the parchment, rolled it up, and owled it off to her editor. Breathing a sigh of relief, she went off to get dressed for her date. Ginny had another new relationship that was now requiring her attention.

2. Truth or Dare

Authors Note: Well, it certainly has been awhile. I actually started this chapter in the summer, but with school and college applications, I could never find time to get back to it. Somehow, I found the urge to write today, so I finally got it out. Sorry for the extreme delay. I hope it was somewhat worth it. I could only fit in two story lines to this chapter, but don't worry! Everyone will get covered, just not in every chapter. Hope you enjoy

********************************************************

Truth or Dare: Such an interesting game isn't it? While most people find dares to be the juice behind the game, (and who wouldn't want to see their good friends run naked around a city block) I've always been a little more partial to truth. You always find out new things about the people you thought you knew best. When you really think about it, the fun in the game lies in the fact that you never truly know everything about a person, no matter how good a friend or even lover they are.

*********************

“Ok, um…Hermione! Truth or dare?” Ginny brought her knees up to her chest as she sat on the floor of her flat with her three best friends. It was eleven-o-clock on a Tuesday night, and Hermione had called up a few hours earlier complaining of tons of stress mixed with mild boredom. After conferencing with the other half of their fabulous foursome, Ginny had arranged an old fashioned sleepover. After the obligatory chit-chat about Julia's continuing nightmare of a job with the Malfoy children, Hermione's new yet-to-be-classified “thing” with Harry, and Luna's nightclub, the night had turned to an exciting game of Truth or Dare.

“Merlin, I still can't believe we are playing this. What are we, second years at Hogwarts?” Hermione sat fidgeting. She had always had a love-hate relationship with this game.

“Come on!” Luna exclaimed. “Just chose one. We are wasting precious time here!”

“Ok! Ok! I guess I'll go with truth. You aren't making me drink any weird potion like you did seventh year.”

“For the last time, it wasn't weird potion! It was just pumpkin juice with a taste repellent charm on it. We just liked watching you squirm.” Ginny smiled at the memory of watching Hermione down what she thought was an anti-inhibition potion to get her to give Neville Longbottom a lap-dance. That game had been one for the history books. “Now,” Ginny thought aloud, “what to ask?”

“You'd better make it good or I'm likely to fall asleep. Do you know what time it is?” Julia had been up since four in the morning after getting an urgent owl from Mrs. Malfoy that had turned out to be a list of errands she wanted Julia to run for her before coming into work. It had only taken two weeks for Julia to go from being the Malfoy's tutor to being their personal slave.

“Its only eleven fifteen, Granny! When did you get so old?” Luna had been sleeping until all hours of the afternoon with her new nightclub business booming.

“I'm sorry. Not all of our jobs involve dancing around with teenagers until all hours of the night.”

“Girls! Break it up.” Ginny yelled. “We have to think of a good question for Hermione, and for that, we need teamwork.”

“Ok! Calm down. How hard can this be with so much good material?” Luna said with a smirk.

“Material?” Hermione began to get nervous.

“After all, we can ask her anything about Harry. This should be fun.” Luna knew there was a reason she liked this game.

“Good thinking, Lovegood.” Ginny said. “So Hermione, how big is he?”

“Excuse me! Don't you already know that?” Luna shouted cheerfully, tossing a throw pillow at Ginny.

“What!” Julia and Hermione shouted together, as Hermione almost fell over. Ginny went a little red in the face and hurled the pillow back at Luna.

“What?” Luna asked innocently. “They didn't already know?”

“No one knew. “ Ginny started through clenched teeth. “It was a secret, remember?”

“Oh, yes. It's coming back to me now.” Luna giggled. “They would have found out anyway, as I was planning on asking you about it during the game. Don't you just love Truth or Dare?”

“Whoa, wait a minute.” Julia's head was still reeling a little, but not merely as much as Hermione's. “Are you saying that you had sex with Harry?”

“Not technically …” Ginny trailed off, seeing the stunned look on Hermione's face.

“What is that supposed to mean? `Not technically'?” Hermione said, still stone faced.

“It means, well, it means …”

“Spit it out, Weasley!”

“A hand job your seventh year!” Ginny screamed, then immediately buried her face in a pillow.

“And you never told me!” Hermione yelled more amused than angry.

“Well, even then, we all figured you had feelings for him. I didn't want to make you mad at me.”

“That is so stupid! I don't care what you did with Harry. I don't even know what I'm doing with Harry right now, so …” Hermione couldn't believe Ginny would hide things from her.

“I'm sorry sweetie. I promise, no more lies.” Ginny held out her hand for Hermione to shake. “Deal?”

“Yeah, deal. And that goes for everyone!”

“Ok.” Luna and Julia nodded in agreement, then Luna continued, “So back to the game, how big is he?”

“We'll just keep that to ourselves.” Ginny replied

“To yourself.” Hermione interjected.

“What are you talking about? You've seen it, haven't you?” Julia asked, concerned.

“Well, wehaven'thadsexsincethefirstnight.” Hermione mumbled to herself.

“Hold on! Rewind that back for me. What did you just say?” Luna found herself caught between being stunned and being amused.

Hermione took a deep breath. “We haven't had sex since that first night, and since I don't even really remember what happened that night, I don't know how big he is.”

“God, that's depressing.” Ginny sighed.

“Its not that we don't want to! It's just…I don't know what it is. We just haven't, so can we drop it. I mean, it's a weird situation. Why do you think I can't classify it yet, and you know, I always classify my relationships! It's what I do best, so lets just talk about something else, can we?”

“Of course we can. Guys, let's let Hermione pick a new person.” Julia said, patting Hermione's arm.

“God, when did this turn into Depressionville? I'm going to get some more vodka. If this party needs anything, its more alcohol.” With that, Luna stalked off to the kitchen.

“Why does she always have to get all weird when we talk about relationships. Just because she has commitment problems, doesn't mean she has to take it out on us!” Julia couldn't take Luna sometimes, and the other two knew it.

“Lets just get on with the game, shall we?” Ginny interjected, trying to stop controversy. “Maybe we should just pose some general questions to everyone. That way, no one feels pressured to answer.”

“Good idea!” said Julia.

“Ok. I have a good one for everyone. Has anyone here ever done anything sexual with any of my brothers? No dirty details please. I don't think my stomach can take it.” Hermione and Julia gave each other sideways glances as if asking each other if they should disclose this information. Julia gave Hermione a small nod, and they both started to giggle. “Lord, maybe this was a bad idea!”

“It's not as bad as you think.” Hermione smiled.

“I'll go first. Three years ago. George. I was extremely lonely. I ran into him at the Leaky Cauldron. We talked for hours about anything and everything, while getting extremely drunk. One thing led to another and - “

“You slept with George!” Ginny squealed, coughing up her drink.

“No! Heavens no! We made out in a corner of the bar. We swore never to mention it. It was a good conversation though, now that I think about it.” Julia was lost for a second in thought, until Ginny snapped her out of it.

“Ok, anyway! Moving on. Hermione, I have a feeling I know who this one involves.” Ginny winked, remembering her brother's schoolboy crush on Hermione.

“I'm assuming you mean Ron, and you would be wrong. It was your father. He was wonderful. I have never been with a man more tender or sweet than Arthur Weasley.” They sat in silence for a moment, during which Ginny failed to breathe. “Oh relax, you idiot! Of course it was Ron!”

“You bitch! That is a mental image I'll never rid myself off!” Ginny buried her face in her hands.

“Oh, its too easy to get you! Anyway, back to the question. Ron. Sixth year. I knew he liked me so I figured I'd let him kiss me just to see.”

“And, “ Ginny prodded, very surprised she had never heard about this before.

“Like kissing my brother. Completely awful.” Hermione made a sour face at the memory.

“Are we still talking about Harry, because if we are, I'm going back into the kitchen.” Luna said, walking back with an iced bottle of vodka.

“No, we were talking about who had gotten it on with anyone in my famed family. Sadly, these two were big duds, so that leaves you.”

“Me?” Luna suddenly looked very uncomfortable. “Why would you think that I would have done anything with your family?” She started to fidget with the bottle. “I mean, I'm so not into that red-hair thing, and anyway it's not like - “ Luna was cut off by the sound of shattering glass. She had dropped the vodka bottle. “Oh my god! Ginny! God, I am so sorry.”

“It's OK. Just don't move. Let me grab my wand, and we'll fix this right up.” As Ginny tiptoed her way around the broken glass surrounding Luna, she noticed Luna's face was bright red. Hermione noticed as well from across the room and leaned into Julia.

“You think someone is hiding something?”

“Duh!”

*******************

People are always lying to try and cover up who it is they truly are. It might be little things, like hiding the fact that they subscribe to a dirty magazine or that they once ate one hundred chocolate frogs in one sitting (and yes, both are me). However, it could be big things; anything from a secret crush to a hidden ex-lover, to a time they stabbed you in the back. It's secrets like these that scare women most in the dating world. How much do we ever really know about the people we date or even our friends, for that matter?

*************

Two nights later, Hermione found herself using her newfound knowledge of her friends to spark up conversation with another old friend.

“So, a hand job seventh year? That must've been fun!” Hermione smirked as she passed Harry his Sesame Chicken. Chinese food was another one of their odd rituals. Harry choked on his egg roll at the unexpected comment.

“W-what?”

“Ginny. You. Hands moving over things. I'm sure you couldn't forget a thing like that!” She smiled again and jokingly patted his hand.

“Oh god. Do you girls have to share everything? I can't believe she told you that!”

“Why do you care? I don't. It was ages ago! I just like making you squirm.” She laughed at his confused face as she grabbed herself another dumpling.

“I don't care that you know. It's just - I don't know. Guys don't talk about stuff like that.”

“Oh please! What about all that `locker room talk' about who's shagged whom? I know you and Ron have talked about all that kind of stuff.”

“Not 6 years after it happened!”

“Yeah, well, truth or dare brings these things out.”

“You were actually playing truth or dare? What are you guys! Second years at Hogwarts?”

“That's exactly what I said!” Hermione smiled at their likeness, and she could see Harry doing the same.

“It's like one mind!” He said motioning back and forth between them. “Well, in this game, did anything come up about us?”

“What do you mean `about us'?” Hermione had been trying to avoid the subject all night.

“Oh come on. I know your friends, especially Luna, wouldn't pass up a chance to talk about this,” He paused thinking of the right word, but nothing came to him, “this thing of ours.”

“Do we really have to talk about this?”

“Hermione, I know you of all people should want to talk about this. You have to classify everything!”

“I said that too.” She mumbled. Sometimes she wished he didn't know her so well. “Harry, something did come up, but I just don't feel like talking about -“

“Hermione, just spit it out! What did you tell them?”

“I told them we haven't had sex since the first night!” She yelled, sounding a little angrier than she would have hoped. “There! Are you happy? They know, and they thought it was weird, but I made them stop talking about it. Ok? That's it.”

“They thought it was weird? Why?” He looked genuinely confused.

“Because they're all sex-crazed lunatics. I don't know! Why is that what we are focusing on?”

“It was just a question. Merlin, calm down.” Harry calmly ate some more chicken while Hermione gaped at him, appalled at him calm.

“How can you not find it odd that we had sex before we were even together, and now that we are, or at least, now that I think we are together, we haven't even gone past second base? Isn't that just a little strange to you?” Hermione stopped to catch her breath after releasing the question she had been carrying around for two weeks. Harry suddenly looked very uncomfortable and nervous. Hermione felt slightly satisfied that she had finally gotten to him, but also nervous at what he was about to say. Nothing could have braced her for what came next.

“Well, actually, there is something I wanted to talk to you about.”

“What?” Hermione was now getting more and more nervous.

“About the first night.” Harry looked like he was trying to swallow, but couldn't get it down. Hermione didn't understand this sudden shift in mood.

“What about the first night?”

“We, uh, we didn't really. What I mean to say is we didn't - “

“Spit it out, Potter!”

“We didn't have sex.”

Hermione sat frozen for what seemed like an eternity. She couldn't speak. She just kept repeating what Harry had said over and over, until she could finally squeak out a weak “What?”

“That first night when you were drunk, I was putting you into bed. I changed your clothes and helped you into bed, and you came onto me. Then you kissed me. It was just so amazing, that I knew I couldn't deny how I felt about you anymore, but we didn't … you know. Then when you left in the morning so quickly, I figured you probably thought we did, and I thought maybe that would help you to see me as I saw you.” Hermione remained silent, which made Harry a little shaky. He figured he should keep talking. “Then, when everything seemed to work out, I thought it wouldn't matter. But now, we haven't had sex again because I knew it would be our first time. I wanted to make it really special. Then I realized you wouldn't think it was the first time and - “ He stopped realizing everything he was saying, and how crazy it all sounded. “God, this is really fucked up, isn't it?”

“Yes,” Hermione said softly while nodding, “it is.” She just stared at the table, not blinking, not moving. Harry stood up and walked to her side. He bent down to try to look at her face. He saw a tear roll down her cheek, but when he went to catch it, she swatted his hand away. “How…” she started, then suddenly changed her tone. “How dare you! How the hell could you … I can't even … you completely … Harry James Potter, I cannot believe you would ever lie about something like that! Its sick and offensive, and I just … I can't be here right now. I have to go. I have to go right now.” She got up and reached over for her purse on the kitchen counter. Harry grabbed her arm.

“Hermione, stop! We have to talk about this. About everything! We don't even know what the hell we are doing with each other! You can't just leave.”

“Don't you dare tell me what to do! I don't even know what to do with this information. I can't believe you would lie about something like this. I thought I knew you Harry, and I thought you knew me. How could you do this to me? How?” And with that, Hermione quickly Apparated back to her flat, ran into her bedroom, fell onto the bed, and began to cry, feeling even more like a twelve year old girl at Hogwarts then she had two nights before.

**********

Everyone has his or her first date persona. You know the one. It says “Hi! I'm attractive and interesting. I have no distinguishing flaws or interesting features, for that matter. I can make interesting conversation about the state of my house salad. Please take me on a second date”. Isn't this a lie in and of itself? This is not who we truly are, yet its what we all chose to project to those who we could end up spending our lives with. What are we all so afraid of? Are we afraid of losing those we could potentially, or do already, love? Are we afraid of hurting people? Whatever the case may be, I think its time we all looked at ourselves and asked why we do this. Whatever the reason, I can almost always guarantee that telling the truth will get you what you desire ten times faster. I mean, you get to avoid the awkwardness that always comes when you first witness flaws in your new boyfriend or when they witness them in you. Who hasn't been embarrassed the first time they burped in front of a guy or when they made a crack about the latest political scandal, only to realize it had been resolved three weeks earlier? We need to realize that no one is perfect. I mean, wouldn't it be so much easier if they already knew your flaws and could chose to accept them right away or just leave? It would save a lot of time.

*************

Meanwhile, in a far less dramatic apartment, Luna had been waiting for two hours for him to come. If I say be here at nine, what does that mean to him? Nothing! Absolutely nothing! She glanced at her watch. Half-past ten. Damn it! She had to be at the club in half an hour, and then she wouldn't see him for two weeks. She needed him now, but did he care? No! Luna hated being this dependent on someone, but she couldn't stop herself now. There was too much stress already from the club. Suddenly she heard that familiar popping noise from her front hall. She ran out of the bedroom and slammed the door, confronting him.

“Where the hell have you been? I have a life you know! I can't spend an hour and a fucking half waiting for you to decide to prance on over here. If you want to do this, you have to agree to my terms!”

“Sheesh! Calm down. I got caught up at the office. What do you want me to do about it?” He walked closer and started to rub her arms gently. He just needed her to calm down.

“I just need you here when I need you here.” She sighed, taking in the feeling of his hands. She was still mad, but getting less so by the second.

“Well, it wouldn't be so hard to get here if I could actually tell people where I was going. I had to talk to my mother for twenty-five minutes to convince her I couldn't come over for dinner. If I just had a good excuse, like say, I have to meet my girlfriend, I wouldn't be so late.”

“Ok. One: don't use that word. It's too … conventional. And two: I don't need the world to know about this right now. I just can't deal with it.”

“Deal with what! People are in relationships all the time. It's not like the second coming of You-know-who!”

“Stop with this whole `relationship', `girlfriend' thing. That is not what is happening here. Sex is happening here and that is all. Got it?” Luna pulled his arm away and placed it on her breast. “See? Sex, that's all this is.”

“Well,” he pulled his arm off and put his hands on his hips, “what if that is not all there is? What if I want more?” He pulled her into him quickly and pressed his lips onto hers. He knew he could break her. This had been going on far too long for it to just be sex. He would get her to see that if it killed him, and it might. He needed more, more of her.

“No! Stop!” Luna pulled away and turned her back to him. “I can't do it. I just can't.”

“What? You can't WHAT? What the hell are you so afraid of? Do you not have feelings for me? Can you really deny what's been happening here, because if you can than I'm out of here! I just don't understand what you are so afrai-“ Luna suddenly whipped around with such force that it pushed him back against the front door.

“YOU! I'm afraid of you. I'm afraid of this.” She motioned back and forth between them.

“What are you talking about?” He straightened himself up and looked into her eyes. They looked frightened and weak.

“You don't know me. You never have and … ” She paused, as if she was going to go on, but she didn't. He stood there confused, seeing Luna in a totally different way. When they had started dating a few months earlier, it had been all about the physical. He admitted to himself that it was nice for a while. After some pretty heavy relationships, he needed some fun, and Luna needed the stress relief. They had agreed to keep it light and secret, acknowledging that the knowledge of others could complicate things. However, a few weeks ago, he started feeling more for her. He had known her for so long, but he just started seeing her power, her beauty. He loved the way she thought for herself and didn't have to do what other people expected her to. He needed more of her, but the strain of the secrecy was getting to be too much. He wanted to be able to get to know her even more, get inside that mind, but the more he tried, the more she closed off. She was keeping secrets, and he didn't understand why. He was now so close to cracking it, and then he suddenly figured out how to make the final blow.

“I love you!” He shouted. There was a long, awkward pause as Luna just stared at him, which was not exactly the response he had been hoping for.

“Ronald Weasley! Get the fuck out of my apartment!”

“Wh-what?”

“Now! Go. I'm not kidding.” Luna avoided his eyes and pushed him as hard as she could out of the door, slamming it behind him. She turned around, falling back into the wall and slowly sunk to the floor. Then she cried.

*************

While there are always some things you should try to keep to yourself, like my chocolate frogs eating spree, hiding who we are is just going to hurt us in the long run. We all need to find people who love us, all parts of us, right now, so why are we wasting time getting people to like something we're not. Hopefully, I haven't hidden too much from you, and hopefully you can accept me for who I am, dirty magazines and all. Until next time, this is Ginny Weasley, your Hot Witch in the City, signing out.

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What is up with Ron and Luna? Will Harry and Hermione ever really have sex? Will the trio ever be together in the same room? Will Draco make an appearance as Julia's evil employer? What the hell is going on? To be honest, I don't really know…..just kidding ;) See you next chapter!

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