Forgive

PhoenixPrincess

Rating: PG
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 4
Published: 05/09/2004
Last Updated: 21/03/2005
Status: In Progress

Hermione lives a hard life. A response to the Young and Abused challange. Chapter 4 up! sorry for the wait.

1. Chapter 1

Forgive.

She loved him…she truly did. At least that’s what she told herself after every beating. It was her fault you see. She didn’t know how to cook. That’s what started it all.

He had been the perfect boyfriend all through her 7th year in Hogwarts. He treated her like a queen. Marcus D’Arcy, surprisingly a Slytherin. Harry and Ron were furious that she went to the first Hogsmead weekend with him, but gradually got over it. They knew how happy she was and how well he treated her. That was before they got married.

She didn’t want to marry him, at least not so soon. The problem was she got pregnant. She just couldn’t face her family and friends being an unwed mother so she talked it over with Marcus and they agreed to get married right out of Hogwarts, Hermione was 4 months pregnant. That was 5 years ago and the last day that she spoke to either Ron or Harry.

They both thought it was a mistake, they weren’t even together for a year yet and they told her so. She got mad, they got mad and she told them to never speak with her again.

Marcus made that decision easier for her by moving them Dublin, his home town. Until then they had lived on room service and take out food. But once they were settled he wanted his fist home cooked meal.

Hermione had never cooked before. Her mom was the domestic type but for the last 7 years she barely saw her because of school. So here she was a 17 year old wife and 5 months pregnant trying to cook her first meal. It was a disaster. She burned the meat and nearly caught the kitchen on fire. Marcus wasn’t pleased.

She had a black eye the next day so she did what every sensible witch would do at that moment, charmed it away. Once again Marcus wasn’t pleased. He told her that he wanted her to keep the bruises he left on her as a reminder for her disobedience. She thought she was crazy and told him so.

She spent the next night in the hospital with a broken wrist. She told the healer that she had a nasty fall and they wanted to keep her to make sure the baby was ok. She agreed. The next morning Marcus came into her room with a dozen roses and a guilty look on his face. He apologized and told her he loved her and that it would never happen again. She believed him.

She took cooking lessons and did what she could to please him. He didn’t hurt her again while she was pregnant and she was happy for it. They talked for a while and decided on baby names. He wanted to name the baby after his father, James and his aunt who raised him, Lillian. This suited her fine because she wanted to name the baby after Harry, but she never told him that. She couldn’t keep her mind of her lost friend and it hurt her more then Marcus’ beatings ever did.

Jamie Lilly D’Arcy was born on October 31, Halloween. Suiting for Hermione because that was the day her friendship was born with Harry. She couldn’t help thinking of him anymore. Every time she looked at little Jamie something popped into her head. A memory, a dream. She once had a crush on Harry but then she meet Marcus and she thought it died out.

That was the next thing that got her punished. Jamie was 9 months old and through all that time Marcus was the same man she fell in love with. She thought that the punishments were over; he was just having a bad week or something. She found out that she was wrong. It was Harry’s birthday and she missed him terribly and decided to write him a birthday letter. Marcus caught her and thought she was having an affair with him.

She got a black eye and a bruised rib for that one. She didn’t try to heal herself this time. She knew better.

The punishments were getting more sever and close together. She’d get hit for the smallest thing and he’s always make up for it. He told her he loved her and if she would only be good she wouldn’t force him to punish her.

This went on for 5 years, until Marcus made his final mistake.

Jamie was playing with a muggle coloring book that Hermione’s mother had sent for her last birthday. Hermione stepped out of the room for a minute, and when she returned there were crayon marks on the walls. Hermione reprimanded Jamie like any mother would, told her not to mark on the walls, that it was bad, and was just about to place a cleaning charm on the wall when Marcus walked in. He went ballistic, accusing her of being a bad mother for not punishing Jamie. Then he grabbed Jamie hard enough to make her cry. He shook her and told her to never do it again.

He was screaming, she was screaming, Jamie was screaming and then all of a sudden silence.

Hermione had fainted. She woke in the hospital the next day to find out that she was pregnant again.

She loved him…she truly did. But she couldn’t stand to see her children get punished the way she did. It was her fault you see. She didn’t raise Jamie well enough she’s the one that deserved the bruises on her arms. She loved him…but she loved Jamie and her unborn child more.

Marcus didn’t know she was pregnant again. She told the doctors not to tell him that, just to say that she was stressed and overworked. If it was up to her he would never know.

The next time he went on one of his trysts with an “old friend” she packed all her bags, Jamie’s too, and left on a plane to England. She didn’t know where she’d go, but she had an idea.

She had no idea how much she had missed London until she stepped out of the Airport. Jamie’s little eyes were as big as saucers. They took a taxi to the bookstore next to the Leaky Cauldron. She took a deep breath and, after making sure all her bags were shrunken and in her pocket, grabbing Jamie’s hand she stepped through the doors.

It was fairly simple to get a room without many questions. She looked completely different than she did 5 years ago. Marcus liked her hair short and blonde so she kept it that way with charms or muggle hair dyes if need be. She knew that no one would mistake her for the all knowing bookworm that she was in Hogwarts and for some reason that saddened her.

After they settled in their room she looked in her purse, not much money. Thankfully Harry had given her own vault for a secret wedding gift and she had enough sense to not tell Marcus about it. She changed from her muggle clothes to her robes that she hasn’t wore in years and braced herself for the memories of Diagon alley.

Once again Jamie’s eyes were wide at the sight of Diagon ally. She hasn’t seen much of the wizarding world and many things still amazed her. She held tightly to Hermione’s hand and once they got to Gringotts she demanded to be held.

She had no trouble getting money out of her vault; she just hoped that Harry hadn’t made some deal with the goblins to tell him when someone had used it. She didn’t think that she could face him just yet.

2. Chapter 2

Forgive. 2

A/N I know my writing isn’t very descriptive and the last chapter wasn’t very long but there’s a reason for both. I know on some stories it’s best to be descriptive and have nice long talks about Hermione’s bruises and how she got them but I see last chapter as a sort of prologue to the real story which is how she is around her friends and how some people deal with this.

A/N2 now, it was kind of 3 am when I finished that last chapter so I didn’t really want to put anything like this in it so I’m doing it now. This story is a loose interpretation of the Young and abused challenge. It’s supposed to be set during Hogwarts and Hermione’s supposed to have an abusive boyfriend, not husband but I had this scratching at the back of my mind for a while now and that challenge just gave me the incentive to write it. One more thing, I chose the name Marcus because it means Warlike and D’Arcy because it means descendant of the dark one. And he just seems evil to me….

A/N 3 sorry about this but I’m about ¼ of the way done with the chapter and I noticed that I keep slipping into first person…I’m just going to do it all that way. Different from the first I know…sorry

Disclaimer: The only things that are mine are Marcus D’Arcy, Jamie Lily D’Arcy, the new baby’s name (not revealing it yet), and the plot. Everything that you notice from the series is JK’s.

The last thing that I wanted to, or expected to, hear while walking past a joke shop was my full name. It scared the shit out of me. I stopped in my tracks and tensed up. It was a man, I knew that much, I didn’t know who but didn’t want to risk it so I just stopped doing anything. I nearly stopped breathing. I realized what it probably was. Marcus told me not to coddle Jamie, that she was a big girl and didn’t need to be held. So I placed her on the ground in front of me. My breathing was erratic and there was a deer in the headlights look on my face I knew as he came closer. I tried my hardest not to cry as I heard him stop behind me. He placed a hand on my shoulder and turned me around. I was so tense at this point that I was beginning to shake.

“Hermione?”

He was taller then Marcus, I only came up to this guy’s chest, I came up to Marcus’ shoulder. I relaxed only slightly, there are ways of changing you’re height. I didn’t relax fully until I looked into the face of a familiar stranger.

“Fred?”

It was. Fred Weasley, ½ of the Weasley Twins. He gave me the warmest smile I’ve gotten from a male in a long time and threw his arms around me. I stiffened again and winced as he irritated a nasty bruise on my upper arm that Marcus had given me just the day before…I could tell that this one would take a while to heal. He seemed to notice this and pulled back a bit with a confused look on his face, that’s when he noticed Jamie.

“And who’s this little angel?”

She was peaking out from behind my legs like any normal 5 year old would do when meeting another person. I smiled slightly (for the last 4 years my smiles haven’t even came close to my eyes, I didn’t want to irritate Marcus) and pulled my daughter from behind me.

“This is my daughter, Jamie Lily D’Arcy.”

He looked up at the name. He noticed something that no one else had. Of course he would, he knew the person I was thinking of when I named her such. Fred smiled and crouched down to her. I couldn’t help it as fear flashed through my eyes.

All men are created equal…I’ve heard this phrase before. It flashed through my mind as Fred stretched his hand out to shake Jamie’s. If that’s true then Fred was just as likely as Marcus to punish me or Jamie for anything…I wouldn’t let that happen.

Just as I was about to pick up Jamie and run Fred spoke. It was simple what he said to her and it knocked me out of my thoughts completely.

“Hello Jamie dear, I’m Fred. You can call me Uncle Freddy if you like.”

Never had anyone said something so simple, so caring to her in my presence. I wasn’t allowed to go on family gatherings with Marcus and Jamie and I didn’t know how other adults treated her. I looked into Fred’s eyes and knew that all men were not created equal.

Fred Weasley was different.

But that left the rest of them. I couldn’t hide the shiver as the thought crossed my mind.

I studied him for a while, looked in his eyes and noticed the shear joy that he had just knowing that he was meeting the daughter of a dear friend of his. After he shook Jamie’s hand he stood up abruptly. I flinched and waited for the blow before I remembered that Fred was different.

“Where’s the hubby?”

That one sentence brought everything crashing down on me. I began to look around wildly thinking he’s here. Oh God, he hates it when I talk to other men, I’m so going to get it when he sees me. I must have looked like a deer in the headlights again because Fred was looking at me with concern. Oh God, he’s going to kill me. He said that he would the last time.

“What’s wrong Herms? Did you lose him or something?”

It’s amazing how everything can be changed in an instant. One sentence made me freak out and this next one brought reality crashing back. He was in Dublin, hopefully. Wondering where we are. I didn’t leave a note. I just left.

“He had a lot of work to do. He’s coming in about a week.”

That would buy me some time to get a place of my own away from here. Suddenly I was very aware that we were standing in the middle of Diagon Ally, where anyone could listen to what we were saying.

“Where did you come from?”

He looked a little dazed at the abrupt change in subject but he must have noticed the way I was looking around and caught on. I always knew the twins were smart.

He pointed at the joke shop I had passed. I didn’t even notice its name until now, Weasley Wizard Wheezes. It was their joke shop. When I had left England they only had one branch and it was in Hogsmead. Now it appears that they have two, maybe more.

“Would you like to see it?”

“I’d love to.”

I was so proud of them, I never thought at all about their business partner. I knew Harry had given them a large sum of money at the end of our 4th year and was steadily supplying them with all they needed. I just never thought that he would have shown such and interest in the shop as to help with customers.

And Fred just never thought to tell me that he was.

As I walked into the shop with Jamie in toe I came face to face with the boy, no man now, which I was steadily hoping to avoid.

He didn’t notice me though, thank god, at least he didn’t until Fred said something. I was beginning to think I was wrong about him.

“Oi! Harry look whose back in town.”

I was really tired of being in those damn headlights. Over the years I had fantasies about what it would be like to see Harry again. I would meet him on the street, he would notice me, give me a huge hug, twirl me around, and take me and Jamie away. He wouldn’t hurt me as badly as Marcus, just a slap here; yank there when I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to. Life would be wonderful and I would try my hardest to be good for him.

Then there were the nightmares. I would meet him on the street and instead of him hugging me and twirling me he would scream at me and hit me. He would tell me he hated me and that I didn’t deserve any type of happiness. It was my entire fault that I was with Marcus and he wasn’t going to help me in the latest. He would tell me I deserved it and walked away.

After a few of those the fantasies faded away.

Suffice to say I was terrified of how he would greet me. Tears sprang to my horror filled eyes as he turned to look at me. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of letting me know how bad I was. I scooped Jamie up and ran out the door.

I didn’t know where I was going I was just running. Trying to get away from it all. I was crying, Jamie was crying. Poor little thing didn’t know what was going on.

I could hear him behind me screaming my name. Oh God, he was chasing me. I ran faster and harder, my breath coming out in gasps as I was pushed to my limit. Suddenly I heard a tone used so many times and I stopped in my tracks. In those first few years when I ran, he always caught me and when he did it was worse. It was better that I just stopped.

“God Damnit Hermione stop already!”

I clutched Jamie to me trying to protect her as much as possible. What was I thinking running like that? How stupid could I be? This was all my fault. I looked around and with horror I realized that I was in a deserted part of diagon ally. It looked like there was a tornado or something that came down here once. All the shops were damaged and the ground was in shambles. I’m surprised I didn’t trip and fall. He must have noticed how I was looking around because the next few words took a little while for me to register what he was talking about.

“This is where it happened.”

It? What happened? Then it hit me. The final battle. He was here, Voldemort was not. One less man for me to worry about. But there is still the one behind me and for some reason I’m so much more worried about him then I ever was about Voldemort. I shrieked when he placed his hand on my shoulder. I went down on my knees and started crying.

“Stop, please. I’m sorry; I’ll be good I promise. I’ll be good, don’t hurt her please. She didn’t know it’s my fault. I’m sorry I ran please.”

I knew that wouldn’t change anything, I had said the same thing to Marcus many times but he just told me that it was my fault and that if I was to learn, I had to be punished.

I rocked Jamie more for my comfort then hers. I was just wishing that he’d get on with it. The waiting was killing me.

It was then that I looked up to see him crying. CRYING. What was he so sad about? He probably felt bad for having to punish me. But he had to. I ran.

“Hermione,”

That was when in knew. Harry was different too. The look in his eyes, the way he said my name. He was different, and that scared me. I could handle the punishments, I was used to it. What I couldn’t handle was the way he was looking at me now. Pitying me. There was no reason. Every woman went through what I went through. It was just another cross to bear. Harry’s was Voldemort, women’s were punishments. That was how the world worked. I knew. Marcus told me.

I think I started crying harder when I learned that he wasn’t going to hurt me. That still didn’t stop me from flinching as he threw his arms around me and Jamie. I almost forgot how good an actor he was. But the hug reminded me of the one Fred gave me and I loosened up and hugged him back with one arm, the other still hanging onto Jamie. She had stopped crying, I think she’s asleep. Odd.

Harry squeezed me tighter and I cried out. For the second time today that bruise hurt. He pulled back and lifted up my robe sleeve. For some reason I didn’t want him to see the hand shaped bruise on my arm and tried to stop him but it was no use.

“Hermione, who did this to you?”

“It was my fault, I wasn’t careful and I broke a dish.”

I looked down. I didn’t want him to know how bad I was. This was my first real friend, I didn’t want him to know that everything I did was wrong and I had to be punished nearly every day. I didn’t want him to know the real me.

Something made me look into his eyes. There was an understanding there. Oh god, he knows. He’s going to leave me here now. Or worse, take me back to Marcus. God please please.

He stood up and helped me up. I looked at Jamie and noticed that she was asleep. She probably cried herself to sleep. God she was heavy.

Wordlessly Harry took her from me. The look in his eyes told me it was going to be ok but I wasn’t so sure.

“Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

He started walking and I knew he was expecting me to follow. I had no idea where we were going or what was in store for me when we got there, all I knew was that he has my life in his hands in the form of a little 5 year old and I wasn’t going to let him walk away with it.

How could I know that many miles away the front door of my Dublin home was being opened and Marcus was coming home.

3. Forgive-3

Forgive-3

A/N: Sorry bout the wait. My trial period of MS Word just ran out and that's expensive so I’m having a hard time trying to post my stories. ANYWAY, here's chapter 3 of Forgive.

Smiling faces. Laughing. Playing. Having fun.

When was the last time I did any of that?

There are pictures all over Harry's walls. Pictures of all three of us, him and Ron, him and me, just me. Mostly just me. It kind of made me wonder...if I hadn't gotten pregnant, how bad would've my life been.

He's taken Jamie into his room so she can sleep in peace...I wish I could sleep through what's about to happen.

I've got him pegged now. I thought he was different, but he's not. He's just one of those ones that like to keep it in the dark. A private punishment. Meant only for me to know....that's why he put Jamie to bed.

He's behind me now...I can feel it. I've been prying to long. I should've known better. I should've just sat on the sofa like a good girl and waited for him to come back. It takes all I have not to cringe in fear. Then I stare at a picture that I haven't seen yet, a picture that I didn't even know was taken.

It was my wedding day. The happiest day of my life, well that's what it was supposed to be. All I could think about was the loss of my innocence and of my first crush. I suppose this is what I was thinking about in this picture because it's not one of the one's that I have at home. They are all cheery and happy. This one is far from that. It's a side shot of me sitting at the head table watching all the people dance. A slow dance comes on and I start looking around for Marcus. He's no where to be seen. Ah, I remember this moment now. It was when I first realized that my petty crush on Harry was just a tad more then that. I couldn't keep my eyes off him that night. Even after he Ron and I had that humongous row I was still following his every move.

As I come out of my memory a lone tear falls down my cheek in the picture, and now in real life. Everything was just so much simpler then. There was less pain, more pleasure. I was fine, I didn't need to be punished I was a good girl.

A hand on my shoulder, I jump a mile and spin around like a top. It's just Harry. I look into his eyes for a moment and then remember myself and look down. I'm tense and he knows it. A hand under my chin lifts my face up. I try to look everywhere, anywhere but his face. I don't want to see his disappointment in me.

I was always perfect Granger. Never did anything wrong. I got 215% on my Charms NEWT for Christ’s sakes. Now I'm far from perfect. Not even close.

"Hermione, please tell me what he's done to you."

My eyes snap to his face at the sound of his voice. He sounds sad and angry at the same time. Why? He hasn't done anything that I didn't deserve. I told him so. Apparently, like so many times lately, I've given the wrong answer.

"Hermione, you really can't believe that. How long has this been going on?”

I couldn't understand why he thought I wouldn't believe that. That's the truth of the world isn't it?

“I…I don’t understand what you mean Harry. How long what has been going on?”

His eyes narrowed, I could tell he was angry, upset, torn. That’s when he did something completely unexpected. Threw a curse at me.

It wasn’t a bad curse, just a ripping curse and not to mention he missed, all he got was the sleeve of my shirt.

He ripped it the rest of the way, fully exposing my bare upper arm to him, along with the nasty bruise. He pointed at it expectantly.

“This! How long has he been hurting you, beating you?”

Beating me? The way he explains it makes me think he doesn’t understand. How could he? He isn’t married. But what if…

“He doesn’t beat me. I’m bad. It’s punishment. It’s always punishment. They’re my fault. If you could see how I act you would punish me too. I’m not the same person I was in school Harry. I’m bad now. I don’t know much of anything, and Marcus helps me with that.”

That was all said in a rush. I don’t know what I was trying to prove. But I got light headed, woozy. That’s when I remembered I was pregnant. I had forgotten.

The reason why I was here came flooding back to me. Jamie. The baby. I could feel wheels start to spin in the back of my mind. If I truly believed that, then why did I leave? Jamie. She’s a girl too, she will eventually get punished, won’t she? Why was I so afraid of Marcus hitting her?

I needed to sit down, before I fell down.

Harry, Merlin bless him, seemed to know what was going on as he grabbed my arm, ever so gently, and led me to the couch. His touch was comforting and kind, not hard and demanding as Marcus’ had been for the last few years. He pulled me into a hug and that’s when my life came crashing down.

All the times he hit me…

Yelled at me…

Broke me…

I had a glimpse of what life could’ve been like if I hadn’t made that mistake 5 years ago and gotten pregnant. Now don’t get me wrong. I love Jamie with all my heart, I wouldn’t trade her for anything in the world. But I saw my life from Harry’s eyes for just a moment, and what I saw frightened me.

When I was younger my mum made me promise her that I would never be one of those women that took their husbands back after they hit them. I laughed at her, told her that I was to independent for that.

What a bunch of bullshit.

I can’t even remember when it happened. Why I stayed after he hit me the first time. Was it pride? No, I was stubborn. I had told Harry and Ron that I could handle married life, even at the age of 17 and I didn’t want them to think differently. Didn’t want Harry to be disappointed in me.

I started crying. Sobbing. My whole life, all that I knew was a lie. How could I have been so weak.

I started talking, telling Harry everything. From the reason I married Marcus in the first place to the reason I was here. I left nothing out, I told him why I named my daughter Jamie--the real version and the fake. The only thing I didn’t tell him was of my ‘crush’. I couldn’t bear that to be reveled just yet.

Through all that Harry just sat there with his arms around me. I half expected him to hit me and when he had gotten up I shrunk back into the couch, all he said was that he was going to make me some tea.

Without him here I began to think again. I’ve always been a logical person, and What Marcus did to me was the logical thing to do wasn’t it? I mean you punish someone that is bad and I’ve, undeniably, been bad. What was I thinking. It was for my own good. Marcus loved me. Why was I bad mouthing him. It’s none of Harry’s business what’s happening in my house.

Silently I stood and walked into Harry’s room and gathered Jamie in my arms. And just as silently I walked out the door and into the street. I had to get out of there, before I lost my head again…it’s amazing the things Harry can do to me.

I know he thinks he’s doing the right thing but, it’s not the right thing. The right thing for me to do right now would be to pack up all my things and return to Dublin and whatever punishment would be waiting for me there. Perhaps if I told him I was pregnant he wouldn’t be too harsh till after the baby’s born.

Just as I tuned the corner and was out of sight of his house I heard the door bang open and he was screaming my name. I had to get out of there so, once again, I started running, this time though I lost him and returned to my room. The next day I would leave. Return home.

It was good to be back in London for a while though…

It was nice to see Harry too,

It may be the last time I’ll see him…

4. Chapter 4

Forgive-4

Harry’s POV

So quiet.

Even when she was at my home she wasn’t this quiet…or this still…

God but she’s still beautiful.

It took a little time to track her down. I never really learned where it was that Marcus took her to live. She never gave me the chance. She just up and left. She never knew…

She was always the one and only for me. See I never knew whether I’d live to be 17 or 117 so I didn’t want to get too close to girls. I saw what cedrics death did to Cho and I didn’t want someone else to go through that because of some stupid prophecy. So I acted interested in girls just so the guys wouldn’t think me weird but I never really thought about it. I had so many chances to go out with girls, be with girls, to fall in love that I didn’t take.

Then it happened anyway. It was like something hit me on the head. I was in love with Hermione Jane Granger. I was terrified. Of all the people I could fall for it has to be the one that matters most to me. Whether it be as friends or lovers I would still do anything to protect her and I think that’s why I did fall for her. I was never one for playing it safe, don’t even know what made me try.

I held back when she started dating Marcus. She seemed to really care about him and I used it for my own selfish reasons. ‘It’s better this way, now I’ll never hurt her by leaving.’ And Marcus was so kind to her that I thought it was a good match. Even though he was a Slytherin, which I had a hard time looking past, but once I did I thought he was a generally nice guy.

I was dead wrong.

I always thought I was a good judge of character. Always thought no one could hide anything from me. Guess that’s what Hermione thought as well and look how that turned out.

I should have known. Should have known after he’d taken her away, after birthdays came and went, replies to letters were left unsent and no communication from her what so ever. She didn’t even come back for the final battle. We could have used her. I needed her to be there. But she never came.

I was furious with her after that. If I’d only known what she was going through I’d have come to get her. Voldemort used her against me. Said that the reason she never came was because he had killed her. If he only knew that was the worst thing he could have ever said. I used the anger, pain and hurt that that thought sent through me and burnt up the whole street. Oopsie.

After the fog of the battle left me I realized that it wasn’t true. I’d have known if she was gone. I’d have felt it. But in the back of my mind I always thought about it.

Then I saw her walk into the store.

She looked a lot different from what I remembered. Her hair was blonde and short and she had an air of desolation around her that I just knew couldn’t be good. The look in her eyes wasn’t delight at the thought of seeing me…it was pure terror.

When she ran I just knew I had to go after her. It may just be the last time I do and I needed to find out what had her shaken this way.

I was tired of running after the first five minutes, and to be honest, it was getting annoying. I couldn’t understand why the hell she was running from me. I was so happy to see her one minute, and the next I was chasing after a terrified woman and a screaming child. I wonder how that looked to bystanders.

Finally when I realized we were in ground zero and most definitely alone I decided to speak up. I was tired, confused and annoyed and it all came out in my voice when I screamed at her to stop. And the most amazing thing happened. She did. She stopped dead like she hit a brick wall. I’ve never seen anyone stop that fast.

I could see her hold on to the girl just a little tighter and look around. I stopped to take a breath and I saw her tense up like she just realized that we were alone.

“This is where it happened.”

I couldn’t help but let her know why there was an area like this in Diagon Alley. She tilted her head like she used to do when working out a hard problem. Then it dawned on her. I could tell by the way she began looking around with fervor. I placed my hand on her shoulder to calm her and it did the exact opposite. She screamed so loud it echoed in the emptiness, then fell to her knees clutching, what I supposed was her daughter, and began to cry.

She was mumbling something, that I couldn’t quite here so I knelt next to her.

“…promise. I’ll be good, don’t hurt her please. She didn’t know, it’s my fault. I’m sorry I ran please.”

I didn’t believe that she thought I would hurt her. I couldn’t believe it. We knew each other for so long, I loved her with all my heart and she thought that I would hurt her. I couldn’t help it. I started to cry. As I looked into her bloodshot eyes, I cried for her, for me, for everything we’ve been through and haven’t.

“Hermione,”

A realization dawned in her eyes at that moment, a realization that I didn’t understand till much later. She began to cry harder and when I put my arms around her and squeezed she cried out.

When I lifted her sleeve, saw the bruise, and heard her explanation I knew. He beat her. The son of a bitch beat her. It took all I had not to start screaming. I was afraid she’d curl up again and think I was going to hit her. I would never hit her.

I took the girl and walked to my house checking every-so-often that Hermione was following me. When we got home I told her to sit in the living room and that I’d take care of the girl. When I came back into the living room I saw her lost in the pictures on the mantle. They’re mostly of her. I try once again to place my hand on her shoulder and, once again, she jumps a mile. She spins and looks into my eye then down again. It hurt me that she thinks she deserves this. No one deserves this. It all comes out in a rush, she’s protecting this man, the man that took her away from all her friends, that took her away from me. The man that gave her that bruise and took her away from HERSELF most of all. This is the same self assured girl I went to school with. From the looks of it she’s the exact opposite.

She swoons and I know that if she doesn’t sit down, she’ll fall. So I help her down and that’s when it all comes out. She started talking, telling me everything that happened in the past 5 years. From the reason she married Marcus in the first place to the reason she was here. She told she named her daughter after my parents. That she couldn’t stop thinking about me.

She tried to write, but he didn’t let her. I couldn’t believe how wrong I was thinking she didn’t want to speak to me. I had to get away. I couldn’t look her in the eye knowing that while I was so angry with her she was being ‘punished’.

That was when I made the biggest mistake of my life, I went to make tea.

When I came back, she was gone.

I chased her for a while again. But I soon realized that she didn’t want to come back, that she was going home to him. So I stopped running, but I kept her in my sight. I couldn’t loose her again.

That’s how I ended up here. Next to her bed in the ICU section of St. Mungos. I followed her to Her home in Dublin and thank god that I did.

I was too late though. Hermione was laying there bleeding, unconscious, and Marcus was nowhere to be seen. The bastard.

I used the Floo connection to contact St. Mungo’s to get Hermione out of there as soon as I could. I didn’t even realize that I was crying.

Jamie, thank Merlin, was in her room, crying also. I told her that I was going to send her with some nice people to take care of her for now. She asked for Hermione and I started crying harder.

I told her what I thought she could take I think ‘you father beats your mother and despite the fact that she could squash him like a bug, she lets him’ sounds particularly nice after what she just went through. I told her that mommy is sick and needed to go to the hospital. She just nodded like she knew what I meant. It hurt that she knew.

I called Fred through the Floo and told him the whole situation. I asked if he could take care of Jamie until Hermione was better. He was delighted, of course and I sent her on her way.

So here I sit. I’ve been here for 3 hours already. They say she’s stabilized but won’t wake up. It was touch and go for a while, they said she was dead for over a minute. When I heard that my heart skipped a beat. I don’t know what I would do if I lost her.

All I can do is sit here, tell her that it’ll be ok and that her daughter’s waiting for her.

Once she wakes up and I know she’ll be ok, is when it’s time for me to go hunting.

Marcus will pay.

Hermione POV

Beep…Beep…Beep…

Your life really does flash before your eyes before you die. You have this moment of complete clarity. Like you understand everything that’s gone on in your life, like you see it from a new perspective.

Beep…Beep…Beep…

I don’t like what I saw. I don’t like being wrong, and I like being stupid even less. But that’s exactly what I am. Wrong and stupid. Go figure.

Beep…Beep…Beep…

The doctors say I died. My heart stopped beating for over a minuet. They won’t tell me about the baby. Well, I haven’t really asked, couldn’t really ask. Can’t even open my eyes.

Beep…Beep…Beep…

I think Harry’s the one that found me. I hear his voice ever now and then telling me that it’ll be alright. To hold on. Am I really that bad? What happened when I came home?

Beep…Beep…Beep…