Wild!

cew-smoke

Rating: R
Genres: Drama, Suspense
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 07/10/2004
Last Updated: 16/10/2004
Status: completed

Hermione was not her self anymore. Harry was no longer with her, but she knew where he was - sort of. She needed to try and find him, before it was too late. Before he killed again. The question is how does one find a madman, living like a beast, deep in the forbidden forest? The story of what price someone is willing to pay, to hunt down the one they love. Think you know how this one will end? Guess again.

Chapters

1. If I Was To Find You

2. Her Silence Was Deafening

3. The Dedicated Girl

4. A Place To Hide In

5. The Brave and The Foolish

6. The Nature Of A Woman

7. Cast A Shadow Skyward

8. A Light To Find Their Way

9. The Hunter And The Hunted

10. Tragedy Is The Color Of The World

1. If I Was To Find You

Authors Note: The idea for this came to me recently and I absolutely could not shake it from my mind. Please note that this work has some dark, mature subject matter. I do not take any of the topics lightly. However, if psychological violence or sinister erotic overtones bother you, then please do not read this story. I wish that I could write the story as I see it in my head. If I could, I know it would leave you with some of the same bizarre and intense feelings that I have felt while writing it. For those of you who choose to continue; I would like to thank you for reading this story, whose ideas and thoughts haunt me. For those of you who hate it -- don't feel bad, so do I.

If I Was To Find You

There are only five more weeks in the school year. Hermione was feeling a deep and uneasy tension in her life. The great battle was not at all what she had expected. She felt that in the final moments the trio would have stood together and faced Harry’s prophecy together. It certainly did not end up that way. Ron had been taken out early in the fight and was lying unconscious about a hundred meters away. She only made it about another forty. She had been gravely hurt, both of her legs had been broken and she was lying on the ground bleeding. The pain was excruciating, but she kept herself from screaming. She was doing the only thing she could do, listen.

She listened with every fiber of her being. It frightened her deeply. To this day she is plagued by nightmares, both morning and night. The words that were thrown between Voldemort and Harry were so viscous and violent that she would not repeat many of them for the rest of her life. When Harry had seen Ron and Hermione fall and writhe in agony, a piece of his mind left him and never came back. Harry was not going to face Voldemort as the noble hero; he was going to face him as a madman. The final moments were utterly devastating to Hermione’s heart. She heard the Dark Lord use the most horrific lies about Harry’s parents. Then she heard the greatest lie of all. He-who-must-not-be-named told Harry that no one loved him. He said they were nice to him, because they were afraid of him. And that made the two of them exactly the same. At first Harry lashed out in anger and then he turned as cold as winter. He had leapt at Voldemort and began tearing him apart with his bare hands. The Dark Lord cried out in abject fear as he fell before Harry’s ferocity. Then the most heart-wrenching sound she had ever heard came from Harry’s lips. He began to cry out, though not as a young man, but as a wild and wounded animal. It was still him, he was no lycanthrope, though he might as well have been. He made the sound of a mad beast and it echoed throughout the forbidden forest. Every living thing for a mile disappeared fast and far. Then, she heard Harry run off into the dark wilderness and never heard from him again.

She lay there for almost four hours, until Hagrid had finally discovered her and Ron. He yelled out to the others and immediately she was surrounded by all the faces she had come to know and trust, save for the one that she craved the most. The war was finally over, but the wounds ran still and deep.

Today, she was sitting in the great hall and staring across the table at Ron and Luna. Ron had suffered at the loss of Harry. He was almost never happy and when he was, you could hear the empty echoes in his laughter. Hermione did not have the strength to comfort him, and so Ron fell into Luna’s arms. Luna became his strength. She had this amazing ability to siphon out the poison of despair from his mind and fill him up with a sense of purpose. Hermione was desperately envious of that, but still found the courage to wake up each morning with enough strength to push herself until it was time to collapse into bed at night. Worst of all though, were the dreams. At first they were of some nameless fear that walked beside her in the darkness, but now the fear began to take shape and form. Voldemort was right about one thing. Hermione had now become afraid of Harry. His name had replaced Voldemorts as the name that was never spoken. Not because anyone thought evil of him, but because no one knew what to say, so they said nothing at all.

Five more weeks and her N.E.W.T.S. would be out of the way and she could leave this hateful place behind her. Hogwarts was no sanctuary of learning to her anymore. It was a tomb.

“Hermione?” Luna said sternly, “You’ve been silent for almost two straight days. I’m worried about you. Don’t make me sic Dumbledore on you.”

Dumbledore Hermione laughed to herself. Where was he when they needed him so badly? He had abandoned them for some reason that now no longer mattered, and Harry was forced to face the horror alone. He was nice enough to Hermione and did everything he could to help her open up and talk about what happened, but she would rather cut her own tongue out then betray her memory of Harry.

“Please Hermione,” Ron said gently, “please talk to me.”

“I’m sorry Ron. I’m just a bit tired.”

“Listen,” he replied, “it’s only two more days until the weekend. We were given special permission to leave the school on Saturday. You and Luna and I are going to Hogsmeade and we’re going to spoil ourselves for a day.”

Luna piped in, “Plus, I kind of have something special planned and I’m not prepared to take no for an answer. So you need to come.”

Hermione stared at Ron and noticed that he and Luna had exchanged glances between each other. She shrugged her shoulders. It would be easier to just go with them, than try and argue about it. So she agreed. She got up and made some excuse about having to go to the library. She walked blindly into the madding crowd.

--- ---

Hermione spent a great deal of time walking through the forgotten places of the school. She found the least likely hallways, corridors, staircases, and secret rooms. They had all become her sanctuary. She came here and hid amongst the forgotten things and secretly wished that she would become forgotten as well. She was heading towards one of her new favorite dark spaces, but instead turned a different path. She passed by Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom and walked straight in. She yelled out to Myrtle to show herself. Myrtle slowly faded into view and sat hovering in front of Hermione.

“Myrtle, how far from this bathroom can you go?”

“I don’t leave this bathroom, it’s mine and I quite enjoy it here.”

Hermione took a deliberate step forward and looked straight into Myrtle’s ghostly eyes.

“I’m not sure you heard me. I said how far from this bathroom can you go?”

Myrtle looked confused and began to turn away.

Hermione felt rage welling up inside of her breast. She pulled out her wand.

“Myrtle?! You will answer my question or I will destroy this bathroom and you will be haunting a pile of rubble.”

“Don’t do that! Okay… I can probably go anywhere I want if I tried. I just never do.”

“I need your help. Will you help me?”

Myrtle was surprised at that. The last time anyone asked for her help was five years ago when Harry questioned her about how she died. However, she could sense that what Hermione was going to ask for was something far different.

Myrtle timidly asked, “What kind of help?”

“I need you to go out into the forest and find Harry. Find him and tell me how he is doing. Do you understand?” she said as she began to shake, “I need to know what is happening out there in that awful place. Please do this?!”

Myrtle knew the difference between sanity and insanity. She was very aware that like herself, Hermione was precariously balanced between the two.

“I’ll go. I’ll go and look for Harry. I promise.”

“Thank you,” Hermione said as she tried hard to control the desperation that was choking the life from her. “I have to find Harry. If I could just find him then maybe…”

She turned around and walked out of the bathroom. Myrtle watched her leave.

“She’s not long for this world,” Myrtle whispered to herself.

--- ---

Hermione found herself in a strange cubby hole of a room. She had not seen this room before and that made her curious. She loved feeling curious, because it was the only other emotion she had that wasn’t fear or despair. She walked in and looked around, the room appeared empty. The dust was so thick that each footstep she took left a clear impression. It made her feel like she was exploring some strange new place that no one had ever seen before. She closed the door behind her and reveled in the dark that surrounded her. She could not even see her hand right in front of her.

She took a few timid steps inside. A very dim light appeared at the other end of the room. She stepped towards it and saw a strange looking mirror hanging against the wall. She peered into it. She saw herself there, but she looked different somehow. She looked a little older than she was now. She was wearing a pretty gown and she appeared to be quite pregnant. In the mirror she was rubbing her belly and singing softly to her unborn child. Behind her stood a dark shadow. It was very imposing, almost frightening. The shadow stepped closer and wrapped its arms around her and held her hands from behind. The shadow was definitely a man, but she could not see his face. She then saw herself lean her head back and rest it quietly against the man’s chest. Just staring at this image brought her a strange sense of awareness. Then she began to feel very odd inside. Almost a revulsion at what she was seeing. This represented something she knew deep down that she wanted. But somehow the thought of getting what she wanted made her feel angry. Every emotion that swept through her caused her anguish. She never knew how to react to her own feelings anymore. They disturbed her.

Hermione reached up and unbuttoned her school robes and let them fall to the floor. She then took off her shirt and shorts as well. Her bra and panties were the last to go and she laid them on top of the rest. She felt a chill being naked inside this forgotten room. She lowered herself to the ground and laid herself down in the thick dust. She began to rock from side to side and felt the dust caking on her back. Then she rolled herself over again and again, back and forth. Each time the dust would cling a little more to her skin. Her body was covered in it now. Her hair, her face, her arms, her breasts, her legs, everything from head to toe was coated in a thick layer of years gone by. The dust and cobwebs represented time passing and she had immersed herself in it as if she could become a part of it all.

She stood up and looked in the mirror again, this time it was different. For the first time in its history the Mirror of Erised showed absolutely nothing at all. It was empty. All she could see was a pretty, but strange girl completely covered in dust staring back at her. The mirror’s faint light began to fade and left her seeing nothing at all. She put her clothes back on over her filthy skin and left the room never to return to it. If someone had gone in after her they would see nothing but footprints and body prints on the floor and a rather plain looking mirror with a large crack running all the way through it hanging from the wall.

--- ---

Hermione lay in the warm water of her bath. She looked down at herself and stared at her body. She thought back to a time when she would feel desire well up inside. It became so strong at times when she was with Harry. Now for some reason it was gone. There was nothing. She tried hard to think lurid thoughts, any thoughts, but they felt lifeless. She sighed and pulled herself out. She had gotten all the dust off and she felt a little hungry. She hoped it was not too late to swing by the great hall.

When she got there it was dark. Too much time had passed and everyone had already gone up to bed. She called out into the large room.

“Dobby? Are you there?”

Within a mere moment he appeared. “Yes, Dobby is here. Are you wanting anything? If Dobby can help you, it would please Dobby very much.”

“I’m a bit hungry, is there anything left to eat,” Hermione asked.

“Oh, Great Hall is closed and we are not supposed to be serving any more food tonight. Come with Dobby down to kitchens and Dobby will be making something for you there.”

Hermione followed Dobby down to the elusive Hogwarts kitchens. There was a bustle of activity as the house-elves were busy cleaning up after the student’s supper. None of them looked upset that she was there. Dobby sat Hermione down near a small wood table.

“What does Hermione Granger want?”

“I’m not really sure. Do you have any soup?”

“Hmmm, yes, leftover spicy artichoke soup. Do you want some? It is ‘very’ spicy.”

“That sounds good. I’d like some.”

Dobby brought out a wooden bowl full of the soup and a small spoon. Hermione blew on the soup and then tasted it. She could feel the warmth of the soup as it passed over her lips; strangely though the flavor on her tongue was very mild. Perhaps she had gotten soup from the top of the kettle, and the spices had settled to the bottom. She was not complaining; the soup made her feel better. For some reason she became exhausted and got up and headed to bed. She dreaded this time. She had to sleep, but when she did the nightmares came. She almost started crying when she thought about it, but no tears ever came. Hermione guessed that she had cried all the tears out of her and there was nothing to fill them back up again.

--- ---

She had barely closed her eyes when the dream came tonight. In the dream she was in the same bed, in the same room. She was wearing a soft, white nightgown that came down to just below her hips. She felt a cold wind blow across her face. She turned and realized that she had left the window open. She wanted to get up and close it, but she was too scared to move. She could hear something outside. Something terrible. Something violent. It was coming for her. She desperately wanted to run, but a part buried deep inside wanted to look it in the eye; so she could overcome the paralyzing horror that clawed at her mind. The sound of deep breathing could be heard just outside in the dark night. A strange growl, like a cross between an angry wolf and the echoing of distant thunder. She could feel sweat dripping off of her. It caused her gown to cling to her skin. Her whole body began to tremble and shake. She tried to hold herself still, but she was too far gone. She sat up shivering and pulled her knees to her chest and held them there with her arms. She tried to call out to someone, anyone. But no sound came from her mouth. She bit her lip so hard that she could taste the blood slide down her tongue. She swallowed and it was bitter to the taste.

The thing was climbing up the wall. Her heart began to thump so hard that it almost hurt. She could feel the beating inside of her ears. There was the sound of scraping claws against stone. Then total and complete silence. It was there, she knew it was, but every noise it made was swallowed by the sinister quiet. She began to breathe erratically and her throat made funny whimpering sounds. Her hands were so sweaty that she could no longer hold her legs up. So, she just sat there waiting to die. Then a dark figure rose up over the window sill and climbed into the room. She closed her eyes tightly. She couldn’t bear to see it. She was too terrified. A single claw brushed against her belly and every muscle in her clinched. Her eyes opened and she saw a hideous creature, but at the same time it was not hideous. She blinked and she could see Harry standing over her. His body was bruised. His hair matted with sticks and leaves. He opened his mouth and his teeth were gnawed down to sharp, jagged rows. His deep, green eyes looked completely insane.

He spoke. “I’ve come for you Hermione.”

Then he quickly sank his teeth and began to tear into her. His clawed hands cut like razors into her skin. Then he was on top of her and she awoke screaming as if she were dying. She looked around violently and her breathing had become hyperventilated. Ginny without saying a word had gotten up and come over. She crawled into bed with her and from behind wrapped her arms around Hermione’s trembling body. She began to softly sing into Hermione’s ear. The sweet lullaby filled her mind with a fleeting sense of peace. Hermione grabbed Ginny’s arms and held them close to her.

“Please… don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere Hermione. Go to sleep. I’ll hold you.”

Ginny began singing again and after a few verses Hermione finally drifted back to sleep.

2. Her Silence Was Deafening

Her Silence Was Deafening

“Are you sure this is what you want to do? I mean you are so close to graduating. You only have a few more weeks Hermione. I cannot stress enough how this will adversely affect your opportunities.”

“I appreciate your trying to help Professor McGonagall,” Hermione replied.

“How about just dropping one or two of your classes?”

“No, my mind is made up. I’m not interested in being successful. I don’t want to go out into that strange world that the rest of you live in. I’m sorry. Please excuse me, I have to go now.”

Hermione stood up and silently left the room. McGonagall looked down at the paperwork in front of her. Ms. Granger had elected to be in only three classes. She signed up for Divination, specifically with Firenze. She asked Hagrid to teach a special topics class in Care of Magical Creatures, and she had asked to take a physical education class, something Hogwarts only began offering this year. These classes did not make sense at all. None of them were even in Hermione’s areas of interest or expertise. Minerva decided she had better go and discuss this with Albus. It was not that Hermione was not within her rights, but she knew when something was very wrong.

--- ---

Hermione drifted through the school halls without saying a word to anyone. She could see the pity and sometimes fear in their faces. It meant nothing to her. She rarely was seen in the library anymore. If she was there, then her precision was surgical. She would walk in, find the book she needed, write down a note or two and leave as quickly as she came. She had learned to harness her intellect. She did not let her mind wander or study merely for the wasted joy of learning. Her topics of study were very narrow indeed. She would not let herself become distracted.

Hermione was beginning to realize the power of the human mind. What it was capable of when all of its energies were engaged in one purpose. Her thoughts had become a sharp blade, cutting everything down to its most primitive level and incorporating them into her understanding.

Lost in these thoughts, she accidentally bumped right into Draco Malfoy. He spun around ready to hurl an insult at her clumsiness, when he realized it was Hermione.

“Oh, it’s you Granger. You look like hell.” He almost stopped there, but then decided now was a good time to go on a rant.

“This is none of my business and I like it that way, but you are dangerously close to losing your attachment to reality. You only have a few friends left and you’re doing everything possible to lose them. A word of friendly advice; open your eyes and do something before you end up disappearing altogether. Of course if you want to completely self-destruct then be my guest. It’s not like it would mean a thing to me.”

He started to walk away, but turned back. “I used to enjoy torturing you. Now, there’s nothing left to torture. You’re barely even alive.”

With that, he left her standing there. She wanted to hate him, but she did not have the strength to pull that strong of an emotion out of her. She could hardly feel anything anymore. She wanted to so badly, but had no idea of where to even begin. She resumed along her original path. A moment later and she had already forgotten the whole thing happened.

--- ---

“Alright class, we’re going to finish off the year with fitness training. This will take a lot of strength and dexterity. For those of you that are taking this as a filler, because Qudditch season is over; you are in for a rude surprise. This section of the class is gonna be tough.”

Professor Algiers was a squib, but was a highly sought after physical trainer. Hermione knew he was only here for this year, to get the class started up. Then it would be handed off to a new teacher next year. He was not happy when he found out that she had been let in for only the last five weeks of class. Hermione assured him that she was here to take it seriously. He gave in and let her stay.

Before his warning even had a chance to sink in, the professor started them on a series of physically demanding drills. This was an aspect of her life that Hermione had long neglected. However, like everything else she did, she threw herself completely into it. She had even brought her mind into focus, and dedicated a great deal of her thoughts into how to best utilize her body for maximum benefit. She would accept nothing less than becoming physically fit and doing so in record time. She even asked Algiers if he would be willing to help her setup some exercises to practice before and after class. He seemed pleased at her dedication and told her that she was welcome to come down and join in with other classes whenever she had a free block. She accepted the invitation and intended to make the most of it.

--- ---

Hagrid was happy that Hermione had asked him to teach a special topics class. He had never done such a thing before and it made him feel good. Hermione felt bad for using Hagrid this way, but felt she had no choice.

“So, err, what exactly did you want the topic to be about?” Hagrid asked.

“Hagrid, I want you to teach me every last thing that you know about the creatures that live in the Forbidden Forest. You must not leave anything out. I need to know exactly what you know, and you only have five weeks to do it in. I am willing to put in as many hours as is necessary.”

“Hermione, listen to me. There are a lot of creatures out there and I’m not sure I could teach you all that in only five weeks.”

“You don’t understand. This is not a matter of whether it can be done or not. I simply must do it, impossible or not. I’m all ears. I will listen to everything you have to say and I will soak it in as quickly as you can rattle it off. No papers, no tests, nothing but me hanging on your every word, until we’re done.”

Hagrid thought for a moment and then said, “I’d be happy to do this with you,” he beamed.

He never even thought of taking on an apprentice before and certainly never guessed that Hermione would be one to want to learn what he knew. He was not about to look a gift horse in the mouth though.

“Alright then, we’d better get on it then. Let’s start with spiders. As you know they come in all shapes and sizes, but we grow them big out here in the forest…”

--- ---

Divination class had ended, but Hermione had not heard a word that was spoken. Firenze noticed this and approached her.

“I agreed to let you into the class, because I am well aware of your sharp mind Ms. Granger. However, if you are going to come, I must insist that you at least listen to the lessons.”

“I’m sorry. I have to be honest with you. I’m not here to learn divination. I’m here to learn about you.”

“I’m not sure I am following you.”

“I need to learn everything you can tell me about the forest. I’m not interested in the creatures there, I have a different source for that. What I need to know, only you can teach me. What is safe to eat and what is not? Are there places that are safer than others to sleep? Are there parts of the forest I need to avoid? How can I find fresh water there?”

Firenze lifted his hand. “These are odd requests indeed. Why would this interest a human girl like yourself?”

“At the end of the school year, I will be going there. I need to learn as much as I can, so I can survive.”

“Ms. Granger, listen carefully, in the deepest forest you would not survive one night alone. There are things far more dangerous than Centaurs roaming the darkness.”

“I have to go and I will go. The question is will you teach me what I need to know, or will you stay silent, ensuring that I will die out there?”

Firenze looked at Hermione and said, “You have backed me into a corner. I am not happy about this, but I will help you the best I can. The deal is this, I will teach you after class hours, but in return I expect you to come to my class and pay attention. Do you understand?”

“I do, and I will. I promise. I’ll see you tomorrow Professor. Thank you.”

--- ---

In the longest corridor, past the darkest corner lay an unknown room. Here she would come and sit on a large stone block, that had worked its way loose from the castle ceiling. She would listen to the wind as it whistled outside. There was always a sickly grayish light coming from where the stone had fallen from. She would lose herself in this faded space.

She wanted to get a firm grip on herself, before it became impossible to turn her life back around. The road she was on, would lead her to ruin. She knew it, but it was like trying to move a mountain by simply pushing on it.

Her behavior was at times disturbing, but her thoughts were far worse. She became intoxicated by the recesses of her psyche that she had feared to tread in the past. She embraced those things that made her peculiar to her peers. However, here in this place, she could do so without fear of rejection. Though, what others thought of her was becoming a burden she no longer bore. Soon, it would mean nothing at all. What then? What would that mean?

She lifted her robes up to her knees and stared at her bare feet. She wiggled her toes and fixated on their movement. She looked around the room again. There was no one else here, nor would there ever be. She lifted her robes to her hips and gently placed her hand between her legs. It was warm there and it felt good to trap her hand there, by squeezing her legs together as tightly as she could. She touched herself, but there was no pleasure in it. Few things gave her any pleasure. Hermione wanted to give her body a sense of release, but there was nothing she could do to force it to respond. She dropped her hands down and let them dangle over her toes. She touched them with the tips of her fingers and closed her eyes. This was not living. This was dying. She got up and worked her way back through the emptiness.

--- ---

Hermione was sitting on the couch in the Gryffindor common room. Ginny walked in and saw her there. She came over and sat on the couch next to her.

“I heard you dropped all your classes and signed up for new ones. Is that true?”

“Yes.”

“Tell me why,” Ginny said tensely.

Hermione not realizing the emotional state of her friend, answered in an offhanded tone, “You don’t want to know.”

A stinging pain fell across Hermione’s face. Ginny without warning or hesitation slapped her quite hard.

“Dammit Hermione! I do want to know. I know that you believe that shutting me out is somehow a good thing to do, but you are hurting me. Do you understand that? You are ‘hurting’ me. You are also scaring me. No more secrets. You can lie or keep your mouth shut with everyone else, but not with me. Now look me in the eyes and tell me what you’re doing.”

Hermione rubbed her check were she had been hit. She knew she deserved it for the way that she had been treating Ginny lately. Especially when Ginny would be there for her when no one else would. Like at night when the nightmares would come.

“I’m getting ready.”

“Ready for what?”

“To go into the forbidden forest and find Harry.”

Ginny closed her eyes and shook her head. She opened them and tears were beginning to form.

Hermione continued, “The last time I asked Dumbledore about Harry he told me something that made me realize what I have to do.”

Ginny stared at Hermione and began to tremble as the tears starting falling.

“He told me that he had sent three people to go and find Harry. None of them came back. They were found dead a few days later, killed by him. Harry is out there and he has lost his mind. I know him better than anyone else in this world. I have to go, I have no choice.”

Ginny replied in a shaking voice, “Why do you want to do this? What do you have to gain? I mean what are you going to do if you find him anyway, kill him?”

Hermione could not bring herself to look in Ginny’s eyes. Realizing that Hermione’s silence spoke volumes; Ginny held her hand over her mouth in shock.

Hermione finally broke the silence, “I have to find him, because there’s no one else.”

She got up and left Ginny on the couch. It was getting late and she needed to eat. She was starving from pushing herself so hard. She went down to the kitchens and imposed on Dobby’s kindness for some food, then came back up and went straight to bed. Tomorrow was going to be brutal. Then the next day she had to go to Hogsmeade with Ron and Luna. She almost laughed thinking that was going to be even harder then her new studies.

3. The Dedicated Girl

The Dedicated Girl

Hermione awoke with a start. Sweat was dripping from her body. She had the dream again. She felt she was doing better; at least she did not wake up screaming this time. She pulled herself out of bed and walked over to a small basin and jug of water. She grabbed a small cloth and then poured some water into the basin. A quick flick of her wand and the water was warm. She looked up in the mirror and saw a stranger staring back at her. She stripped all the way down and roughly scraped the towel and warm water over her entire body. She scrubbed so hard that it turned her skin raw in places. She threw the towel down and flicked her wand again to clean everything up the way she had found it. It was time to begin her new schedule.

She would go first thing in the morning to physical education, then go and visit Hagrid. Immediately after she would eat a quick lunch and then head over to divination class. After that it was back to Professor Algier’s class and then wrap it all up with a final visit to Firenze to get her after hours forest survival studies. Weekends she would visit Hagrid first thing and then spend the rest of the day in more physical training, with a quick stop to the library to check spell and history books to keep sharp on those things that would most benefit her. Five weeks were going to come and go all too quickly. In the end, she had no choice but to be ready.

If she had stopped even for a moment to check her overall psychological health, she would have realized that her mental stability was getting steadily worse. However, pushing herself so hard gave her little time to worry about that. She checked herself one last time in the mirror. Not out of any vanity, but to ensure that she looked presentable enough to the general public, so that they did not worry any more than they already were. Keeping everyone out of her hair now was imperative. No one could be allowed to get in the way of her preparations.

Luna had walked in and noticed Hermione getting ready. She walked right up to her and grabbed the back of her head and pulled her in. Hermione was so surprised that she did nothing but wait to see what was going to happen. Luna looked her right in the eyes and without saying a word kissed her softly on the lips and lingered there. Hermione knew she should be fighting back, but for some reason, she just did not care enough to do anything about it.

Luna pulled back and whispered, “You are losing your mind Hermione. Come out of yourself and open your eyes.”

‘Open your eyes?’ she thought, that was what Draco had told her yesterday.

“When someone does something you don’t want them to do, you have to push back. Do you understand?” Luna asked her.

“I don’t have enough in me to waste on fighting. I have to save whatever I can for when it’s time.” Hermione responded.

“It’s already time,” Luna insisted, “It’s already now. You just can’t see it. You’ve become blind.”

“Blind to what?”

“To yourself you silly girl! Blind to what you are slowly becoming; a complete lunatic. You can barely even function in the real world anymore. Soon enough and you will lose the tools you need to even do that.”

Hermione felt hurt by her words. “Why are you doing this to me Luna? Please just leave me alone.”

“Alone? Why would I do that? Don’t you understand? I’ve come for you Hermione.”

She was becoming confused. Nothing Luna was saying even made sense to her. She tried to turn away and leave, but Luna would not let go. Her grip was too tight. Luna pressed herself against Hermione. Luna’s hands were digging into her back and it was beginning to hurt. She felt them break through the skin and touch the back of her ribcage. Luna was killing her. Luna started to kiss her again and began sucking the oxygen from her lungs. Hermione started to hit and kick as best she could, but she felt trapped.

The pain was becoming unbearable. Luna had her hands all the way into her organs now and she was suffocating to death from her kiss. She tried to scream, but could not.

She felt a gentle touch on her cheek. Then she opened her eyes and saw Ginny standing over her bed.

“Hermione? You told me to wake you up if you slept in too late. Are you alright? You looked like you were having a nightmare.”

“I’m… I’m alright. Thanks for getting me up. I can’t be late. I have to be in class soon.”

Hermione pulled herself out of bed and walked across the room to the basin and jug of water. She looked in the mirror and saw herself staring back.

--- ---

The day had gone extremely well. She had pushed herself a little too hard in physical education, but she took the time to prepare a potion to help ease the pain in her legs and back. She was able to actually pay attention in Firenze’s divination class and noticed that he went out of his way to bring up his life back in the forest a number of times. Always illustrating some important fact about life there. Hermione was extremely grateful. Each thing she learned in class, made more time for other things in their after hours class. She thanked him for that, but he smiled slightly and feigned ignorance about what he had been doing.

Once again she had missed dinner. It was starting to become a habit to eat alone in the kitchens with Dobby nearby, shaking his head sadly at her. Tonight was pot roast and candied carrots. Hermione took a few bites and looked a bit embarrassed.

“What’s wrong?” one of the house-elves asked her.

“I don’t like it when the meat isn’t cooked all the way. This still has pink in it.”

The house-elf apologized profusely and scurried into the back and brought some more, this time cooked until it was well done. Hermione thanked him and then ate the rest of her meal as quickly as possible. She needed to spend some time wandering the school tonight. Her nerves had gotten pretty frazzled from the long day. She still was not used to how much it took out of her physically. She needed to unwind in the dark hallways and perhaps check in on Myrtle, to see if she had any news.

She mumbled thank you again and got up and left. A number of the house-elves looked questioningly at Dobby, wanting to ask about her strange behavior. Dobby turned and looked at them with his shoulders shrugging.

“Hermione has lost her friend Harry. She is still needing time to grieve. Until then, everyone needs to be giving extra attention to her needs. If this is not happening, then Dobby will be bringing it up with Dumbledore.”

The elves, sufficiently scared of the threat, nodded their heads vigorously and promised to do what Dobby asked them.

--- ---

Hermione found herself at the door to the Room of Requirement. She had not thought about it in a long time. She smiled for a moment and then realized she had allowed her guard to go down. She shook her head violently and dug her nails into her palm. When she felt sufficiently focused she looked around and noticed no one was there.

She spoke quietly, “Give me what I need the most.”

With that she grabbed the door handle and opened it. The room looked like a cozy little office. She walked in and noticed a small couch and a leather chair set next to it. In the chair was a woman who was warmly smiling at Hermione. She motioned her over and pointed to the couch.

“Have a seat, or lie down, whatever you feel the most comfortable with.”

She did and sat there quietly with her hands folded in her lap. The woman had a notebook and a very fancy looking quill.

“So, Ms. Granger, I’m so glad you could make your appointment this evening. Why don’t I start with a quick introduction. My name is Healer Binns. You probably remember my husband the good professor of history here at the school. My area of expertise is in psychological well-being and mental illness, with a specialization in teenage studies.”

“Why are you here?” Hermione asked suspiciously.

“Well, guessing from where we are, because I was what you needed most.”

“I thought I had already met all the ghosts here at the school,” Hermione told the woman.

“Well, technically I don’t haunt the school. I haunt St. Mungos, but the magic here thought that I was best suited to help you and so I came.”

Hermione was not sure whether to let this happen or get up and run out of the room. Then an idea hit her and she decided to run with it.

“I don’t need your help working through my problems, but I do need your help.”

“Go on,” Healer Binns replied.

“At the end of the school term, which is only five weeks from now, I will be going out into the Forbidden Forest to find Harry Potter, who is still out there somewhere.”

“I am well aware of Mr. Potter’s current situation. He has been a large topic amongst the healers who deal with psychological cases. I am also aware of how dangerous and fool-hardy this decision that you’ve made is. He has killed three people already. What makes you think that you will be any different?”

Hermione started wringing her hands together, “I’m not sure I will be any different, but that’s a risk I have to take. He’s a murderer now and I have to take matters into my own hands. Will you help me?”

“And if I don’t?”

“Then I’ll leave here and you’ll never see me again. At least not alive anyways.”

The woman thought for a long time and then replied, “Do you know what you will need to do to accomplish this?”

“I think so.”

“Alright then Hermione. I’ll consider your case. Let’s start with me getting to know you better and we’ll see what we can build up from there.”

Hermione spent the next two hours with the Healer and planned to meet her again the same time next week. She believed that the woman might be able to help her mentally prepare, and Hermione was not about to turn anything down that might enable her to accomplish her goal.

--- ---

It was almost midnight and Hermione could barely keep her eyes open. She needed to get up to bed soon. She made one last stop in Myrtle’s bathroom to see if she had found Harry. She walked in and shortly after Myrtle floated down to her.

“I haven’t found him yet. I know he’s out there, because I’m pretty sure that I heard him a couple of times. He’s really difficult to locate. It’s like he’s some sort of animal or something. I feel like I am hunting him rather than just trying to find out where he is.

“Please keep trying,” Hermione pleaded, “I can’t tell you how important this is to me.”

“I… I will keep looking. Let me warn you though, from what I can tell, I don’t think it’s safe to be around Harry. I might even say that he’s kind of dangerous, but I will keep looking and let you know.”

“Thank you Myrtle. Thank you so much.”

With that, Hermione walked out of the bathroom and went up to get some sleep. As she was walking the corridors she ran across Mrs. Norris. When Hermione saw her, she had an inspiration. She took out her wand and transfigured herself into a large tabby cat. Mrs. Norris not fooled by the whole thing simply yawned and wandered off. However, Hermione just discovered that she had a whole new way of learning how to survive in the wild. She was going to spend time each night as a different creature and learn what she could from the experience. Tonight a cat, tomorrow who knows, she thought.

She was immensely pleased with her idea. She spent an extra hour as a cat using all the skills that a cat has at their command, and then exhausted she transfigured back and quickly fell into bed. She was asleep seconds after she closed her eyes.

4. A Place To Hide In

A Place To Hide In

Hermione, Ron and Luna had arrived on an unseasonably crisp, cool morning. Hogsmeade was barely waking up itself. Only a few of the stores were open and sleepy shopkeepers could be seen unlocking doors and running last minute errands. Spring was a bustling time in the wizarding town and a few eager faces could be seen waiting in anticipation for the exciting day ahead.

Luna was the first to speak, “Before we start running around, I have something special that I would like to show you Hermione. Ron?”

“Yeah, let’s head over to the shrieking shack”

“Is that where the surprise is?” Hermione asked.

“Yep,” Luna said with some excitement.

The shrieking shack was no longer the frightening place that it once was. The noises and commotion that used to come from it had stopped for quite some time. However, people still rarely went there. How exciting is an abandoned old shack, with everything else there is to see and do in Hogsmeade?

There was a small, round door set on the east side of the shack. It was locked, but not by a locking spell. A muggle lock was placed on the door and had an impervious charm placed on it. Luna pulled a small key from her left pocket and turned the key till the lock clicked open. Ron grabbed the door handle and swung the door wide. He held it while the two girls stepped inside. He walked in behind them, pulling it shut.

The shack had been immaculately cleaned and the wood floors were stained and finished. Paintings of all the people Hermione cared about in her life were hanging on the walls. There was a small, but cozy looking bed in the upper loft and in the small living area, was a quaint loveseat. There was also a tiny two shelf pantry that was stocked with food. Hermione looked around and suddenly felt very safe and quite at home. There was even a series of shelves built into the wall that had some of her favorite books put away neatly and in order. Luna jumped around the room in giddiness. She reached over on top of a shelf and lifted up a little muggle music box. She turned the handle a few times and set it back down. It played a lovely song that made Hermione close her eyes and hum along. When she opened them back up, she saw Ron and Luna smiling at her.

“What is all this?” Hermione asked.

Ron walked toward her and grabbed her hand, “It’s a very special gift for you.” He pointed to a snow globe on a small table near the couch. “That’s a ministry approved portkey that will take you to the Gryffindor common room. There’s a matching one in the common room that has a protective charm placed on it. Only the three of us, Ginny and Dumbledore can use it. He insisted on that.”

“I don’t understand…”

Luna piped in, “This is your new room. This is your couch and your bed and you don’t have to share it with anyone, unless you want to. The couch folds out and can sleep two more people. For times when you want company.”

“But why?” Hermione asked in a stunned voice.

“So, you don’t have to be embarrassed when you have your nightmares,” Ron said quickly.

Hermione shook her head knowingly, “You mean so I won’t freak out all the other girls every night.”

“Well, that too,” Ron said with a grin.

“I don’t mind at all,” Hermione said, “This is perfect. I love it. Thank you so much. I already feel right at home. Not sure why, but I do.”

“Ron can… can we talk about Harry?” Hermione asked.

“Of course. Our course we can.”

“I know that three people have died trying to bring him back, but don’t you think it’s a little strange that Dumbledore does not go after him? Why is that? I don’t understand. It’s Harry, shouldn’t we do everything in our power to, you know do something?”

Ron’s voice sounded low and ragged, “I agree with you Hermione, but right now, it’s not our decision. Dumbledore said that a tremendous amount of dark magic is being used out there in the forest. So, in the state that Harry is in, he’s extremely dangerous and very powerful. He never said it, but I kind of think Dumbledore is… well… scared of Harry. Or at least scared of what he is capable of right now. I think we’re all hoping that in time Harry will settle down and it will be safer to try and send a group in there to get him back. The other problem, is that he is so far inside of the forest, that there are any number of dangerous things between us and where Harry has been hiding out. More people could die trying to find him and I don’t think Dumbledore is willing to risk that.”

“Oh,” was the only response she was willing to offer.

Ron walked over and hugged Hermione. She did not hug him back, but Ron did not seem to notice. Human contact was hard for her. Luna ran over to Ron and kissed him quickly on the mouth.

She ran over to Hermione and said, “I just knew you would like it.”

She threw her arms around her and kissed Hermione. Hermione stepped back and grabbed Luna by the arm and in one quick, viscous move threw her down to the ground. She had not meant it to be so rough, but Luna hit her nose hard on the wooden floor and it made a sick crunching sound. Luna slowly pulled herself up and blood was gushing from her nostrils. Her nose was bent all funny.

Hermione had fire and ice in her voice, “Don’t you ever kiss me Luna! EVER! I know what you really are. I’ve seen the real you, so you just stay away from me!”

Luna was on her knees and holding her hand over her nose. Her fingers and palm were catching some of the blood, but it spilled over and still made its way to the floor. Ron knelt down at her side. He put his arm around Luna and pulled her gently up. She was shaking and felt tears stinging her eyes. She looked at Hermione and saw undisguised venom and hatred staring back. She would remember that face, that look and it would take many years for her to erase it from her mind.

“Why did you do that?!” Ron yelled at Hermione. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Wrong with me?! What’s wrong with you? You should be on my side! We were friends long before she ever came into the picture. Why are you dating her anyway? There’s obviously something wrong with her. She’s a complete lunatic. She’s only dating you, because no one else will give her the time of day. You’re just too stupid to realize it!”

Ron hit her. Not softly. Not a slap. He hit her. The pain was so intense that it made her eyesight fade to black for a moment. She shook her head and felt a bit dizzy. She sat down on the couch and rubbed her face. It took a moment to sink in what had just happened. Sweet, dependable, loveable, fairly goofy Ron had just hit her. Not like he was hitting a girl, but the way a boy would hit another boy, and it really hurt.

“I’ll have Ginny take the two of us off the protective charm spell. I hope you enjoy your new place. Luna worked day and night for a week to get it done for you. By the way, in the future… don’t talk to me. I’m through with you.”

Ron took Luna by the arm and reached for the Hogwart’s snow globe.

“Wait,” Luna said. Blood was still dripping at an alarming rate from her obviously broken nose. “She doesn’t know what she’s doing Ron. She didn’t mean to hurt me. She’s very confused. We can’t just cut her out of our lives, not when she needs us the most.”

Hermione sat on the couch staring at one of the paintings on the wall. It was a picture of Hagrid standing next to his hut. He was waving with a broad smile on his face.

“Luna, c’mon. We’re leaving.”

Ron took her hand and pulled her away. Luna looked over at Hermione with pity in her eyes. A moment later they were gone. Hermione looked around the room and tried to make herself focus. She tenderly placed her hand on the side of her head. The whole side hurt and she could feel it bruising up quite nicely. She sat there for a moment just looking at all the paintings. She noticed a small mirror hanging from one of the walls. She stood up and walked over. She could see that her cheek and ear were turning a dark shade of violet. That part of her face really hurt, but for the life of her she could not seem to remember why.

--- ---

Four weeks had passed by. They came and went far too quickly. She only had one more week to prepare. She was becoming what she wanted though. Her mind had become sharply focused. It was no longer a storage place for memories and knowledge. In fact, in some ways Hermione had become almost stupid. She would barely be able to survive the classes she had taken in her first year at Hogwarts. However, when it came to her reaction time, her body movement, her quick problem solving abilities and survival skills she was second to none. It was almost scary what she was capable of, but at the same time sad for all the things she no longer was.

Hermione never missed any of her new classes and spent almost every waking hour concentrating on the lessons she was learning. On the rare occasions she was not, she was wandering the empty places of Hogwarts or meditating in the shrieking shack. That place had become her sanctuary. Suddenly it dawned on her that it had been a gift from Ron and Luna. She decided to find them and thank them.

She was heading to get an update from Myrtle. Hermione now knew that not even Myrtle could find Harry, but she would often have tidbits in the form of things she had heard or found out in the forest. She decided it was more important to find Ron. She concentrated on what time it might be and felt that it was probably shortly after supper. She ran to the great hall. Her legs were getting notably more toned and her running ability was quite improved from when she first started. At first she had found her body ungainly and awkward, but each day she felt a little more comfortable in her own skin.

In quick order she was stepping through the doors into the great hall. She looked around and saw Ron and Luna at the Gryffindor table. They had just finished eating and were having an animated conversation about something. Probably yesterday’s quidditch match. She had heard that the Gryffindor had won, but the came was quite close against the Ravenclaws and everybody seemed to be talking about it. She wouldn’t know, as she really did not have time for such things.

She noticed that as she was walking towards the table that the number of Gryffindor students sitting there was drastically reducing. It was almost en masse, the closer she got the more of them turned, saw her and decided it was time to leave. That was pretty normal now. No one would go anywhere near her or talk to her, except for Ginny and her teachers. As a matter of fact, Ron and Luna had not said a word to her in quite some time.

“Hey, you two. How come you haven’t talked to me lately? You two lovebirds too busy for your old friend?”

Ron stopped talking immediately and looked up at her. His face looked distant and unfeeling. It was not Ron’s face at all. He looked so different from what she remembered. Ron began to open his mouth and his lip began to curl in a sneer.

“Ron Weasley, shut your mouth right now,” Luna ordered. She turned back and smiled, “Hi Hermione. How are you?”

“I’m not really sure. Oh my gosh, did you break your nose Luna?!”

Ron shook his head and laughed angrily.

“Um, yes, I broke it a couple of weeks ago. I fell and hit the floor.”

“I’m sorry Luna. I hope it doesn’t hurt too badly.” Hermione replied.

“No, it doesn’t hurt anymore. Don’t worry yourself about it. Come sit with us. Have you eaten?”

“No, I haven’t,” Hermione said. “I don’t really get very hungry anymore.”

Ron looked at Hermione and noticed that she had lost quite a bit of weight. She looked thin and her skin was very pale.

“You need to eat Hermione,” he muttered, “you’re too skinny. It’s not good for you.”

“Oh, I’m fine Ron.”

“Really?” he replied quickly, “I haven’t seen you eat at all in the past two weeks. I’ve been watching you and I couldn’t help but notice.”

“Oh, I’m okay.”

Ron stood up angrily, “No. No, you are not okay. You need to get something to eat!” He grabbed both her shoulders and looked her square in the eye. “You are not well. Eat something.”

“I don’t want to Ron.”

His face went flush and his temper flared up. He began to shake her.

“You stupid girl! How can you not remember that you were the one who broke Luna’s nose?” He pointed at Luna, who looked embarrassed. “Do you see that? You did that to her Hermione. And now you’ve decided to just quit eating?! If you’re trying to kill yourself than keep it up! Because, you’re doing a great job of it!”

Ron kept shaking her and he was unable to control the anger and sadness inside of him. He began to cry and yelled at her some more.

“Stop doing this… whatever it is that you’re doing. I’m sorry Harry is gone. I miss him too. I miss him so much that every day is a new nightmare for me. But, what you’re doing isn’t going to bring him back. There’s a name for what you’re doing. It’s called suicide!”

With that he let her go and stormed out of the room. Luna walked up to Hermione and put her arms around her. She hugged Hermione tightly and then left to chase after Ron. Hermione watched her go and felt another piece of her soul leave with them. Pretty soon there would be nothing left of her. She was almost as empty as that old mirror in the dark room. She had to find a way to hang on. Only one more week and then she could end it all. She would find Harry. She would find him and deal with him; even if she had to die to do it. She wanted to explain everything that she was thinking to Ron, but she was already losing the ability to share her thoughts and feelings with other people. Just talking and keeping up the pretense of some level of normalcy was getting difficult to impossible. She had to try and keep herself sane for just a little longer.

She felt a terrible hunger pang in her stomach. She had gotten herself down to one meal every other day, but she would gorge for that meal. She figured that out in the forest, she would be lucky to eat that often, so she tried to teach her body to deal with that. However, it was time to answer her need, so she immediately went down to the kitchens. Dobby was nowhere to be found, she asked about him, but the other house-elves told her that he was running an errand for Dumbledore and would not be back until later.

She asked if there was any food. A younger house-elf said that there was nothing prepared right now, but there was a rack of lamb cooking over an open fire. It had just been put on and would probably be ready in a couple hours if she wanted to come back. She immediately walked over to it and touched it with her hand. The flesh was bright pink and barely even warm yet.

She smelled it and it made her stomach do a flip-flop. She quickly tore off a large chunk of the raw meat and stuffed it in her mouth. With each bite blood ran down, some into her throat and some onto her chin. It tasted so good. It was sort of sweet and the chewiness of the meat and fat mixed together made her want it even more. She grabbed another piece and ripped it off and began to chew on that as well. All the house-elves had stopped and were watching her in horror. She looked up at them and realized what she was doing. She became embarrassed and wanted to hide her face. She began to walk away, but then with both hands tore off a piece the size of a loaf of bread and then ran out, not looking back.

Even after she had left, the elves just stood there in shock. They decided it was time to talk to Dobby about her behavior and see what could be done.

--- ---

She felt satisfied after finishing off the lamb meat. She ate until she was full and then began to absently chew on one of the bones. She had just ported into her living room. When she saw herself in the little mirror she noticed that her face was a mess. She wet a cloth down and wiped her face clean. She patted her tummy and smiled. It felt really good to eat her fill.

She suddenly became tired and lay down on her couch. She sat staring at the ceiling and noticed how cleverly the rafters criss-crossed one another to help support the roof. There were exactly three spider webs. Only one of them had a live spider though. It was merely sitting still, waiting for anything to become trapped in its web. She looked around and counted exactly five paintings in this room. Of the five, three had people waving and two had people standing there smiling. She could tell that one of the books on her bookshelf was slightly askew from the others. She could smell cinnamon in the air. It was Wednesday and that meant that the candy shop was making cinnamon snap lollys. She also noticed the faint smell of two people who had walked a little too close to the shrieking shack; probably within the past hour or two. None of these things bothered her, she just happened to notice them. At first she did this as practice, but now it just happened on instinct. All of her focus had paid off and she had become painfully aware of the world around her.

Her eyelids were starting to droop and her eyes felt tired and dry. She blinked and rubbed them and decided it was time to sleep. She was too weary to get up and so she just fell asleep right where she was.

--- ---

Her eyes opened and her ears immediately began to tune in to any possible sound around her. She sniffed the air and could smell something was wrong. She closed her eyes and pretended to still be asleep. She kept herself perfectly still and kept her heart-rate down by forcing her body to remain calm. It was out there, but she needed it to give away its presence. The faint sound of a snapping twig did exactly that. It was immediately outside the only window in the whole place. It had to be there, because the door was too secure. So, it was the only other easy way in. She had closed the window, but that would not stop it from coming inside. Almost as quickly as she thought it, the sound of breaking glass shattered through the night air. The smell was unmistakable. The scent was very strong. It was now inside.

She felt a strange tingle in her stomach. She could feel the panic welling up inside her. No matter how much she prepared herself, she knew that it was far faster and stronger than she could ever become. She could smell her own sweat. Her own essence was mingled with a smell that she did not recognize coming from her body. It smelled a bit like a light flowery perfume. It even made her a little intoxicated, from just the scent. She liked the smell and she could tell that it had smelled it too. It was sniffing the air. Its claws were scraping against the wood floor. It was just in the other room now. All it had to do was come through the door and it would see her here, defenseless. The thought of being unable to defend herself against it made her tense.

She felt the tingle in her stomach go a little lower. She began to feel something she had not felt in a long time. Her body temperature began to rise noticeably. She felt an intense yearning shoot through her. A sense of pleasure ran from the tips of her breasts down to between her legs. She could feel herself becoming wet down there. It made her rub her legs together in anticipation.

Then another smell hit her senses hard. It was a strong woody musk smell coming from it. It made her giddy and terrified at the same time. She looked up and it had come in the room. Harry looked at her with a fierce hunger in his eyes. It was going to be very different tonight. He approached her slowly with an intense stare. His eyes never left her. He licked his lips and took another step. Hermione pulled her nightgown up above her waist and spread her legs. She wanted him to come and take her. She did not want it to be soft or gentle. She wanted him to prove that he was worthy of having her. She could almost feel his touch, his need. She craved it like she craved the air around her. She closed her eyes and waited for him.

“I’ve come for you Hermione.”

“I’m waiting,” was her reply.

She felt his body slip between her legs and linger over her. She opened her eyes and waited.

--- ---

Her eyes opened and she looked around. She was still on the couch and still wearing her school robes. She remembered that she had never bothered to change out of them. She got up and walked into the next room. The sunlight was coming through the tightly closed window. She walked back in and looked in the mirror. She saw herself and hated what was there.

She fell to her knees and began crying. It had been weeks since she had been able to cry. She was embarrassed and humiliated. She had eaten raw meat and loved it. The Harry of her nightmares was no longer a thing to fear, but some dark thing to fill a deviant sexual void somewhere inside of her. She touched her cheeks and felt the wetness slipping along the contours of her face. She had become something vile and horrible. She had become a beast like Harry was. The difference was that she had chosen to become this. She was a monster. Her body rocked back with each sob that escaped her lips. She was running out of sanity. She wasn’t going to make it another week. Four weeks was not enough time to prepare, but if she did not leave now then she would not be coherent enough to finish what had to be done. Harry had killed three people, he was no longer the boy she would live and die for. He was some kind of creature that killed for pleasure. She had to hunt him down, find him and… she could not even bring herself to think it. But nevertheless the thought constantly hovered over her, like a violent storm.

She could not leave without saying goodbye, but she knew that there was no one left, except for maybe Ginny and Luna who would even care that she was gone. She decided to use the last of her intellect to write a letter. She would fill it with all of her thoughts and feelings, so that maybe one day they would all understand. For deeper by far than the wild girl, deeper than the madness, lay the real Hermione. Inside her still beat the heart of the one who stood by Ron and Harry through the darkest of times. She had not forgotten her love for both of them. They were two missing pieces from the puzzle of her life, Ron her brother and Harry her love. She was never able to tell them how she really felt, so now was her chance. Her last chance. She grabbed a roll of parchment and a quill and began to furiously write. Her whole being slowly translated into words. Five hours later, when she finally put it down, she had written a small book. She looked it over one last time. It would have to do.

5. The Brave and The Foolish

The Brave and The Foolish

Hermione laid her letter gently down next to the snow globe portkey. She assumed that they would eventually find it, long after she was gone. She changed clothes into a pair of sturdy boots, a pair of hip-cut beige workpants and a faded green shirt. She took a thick hair band and tied her hair into some semblance of a thick, bushy ponytail. She took a leather belt that she had modified and put that on next. It had a leather pouch that she had made especially to fit her wand into. She secured her wand inside and closed the tuck-in flap to keep it from falling out.

She took her hands and from the top of her head all the way down to her toes she touched every part of her body. She searched carefully for anything that might be out of place. She was careful to check for any cuts that might be open. She made sure there were no loose strings or snags on any of her clothing. Comfortable that everything on herself was in order, she mentally went through the things she needed to take care of before she entered the forest. She had to hurry; the last thing she wanted was to start out in the dark.

She took a moment to breathe deeply and force her mind to be alert and fixated on the task at hand. She reached her hand out and touched the portkey sending herself rushing towards the Gryffindor common room. The room was empty save for one Neville Longbottom who was quite surprised to see Hermione suddenly appear.

“Hi Hermione,” he said cautiously.

The last thing he wanted to do was upset her. He had seen her temper and had a healthy fear of crossing Hermione. She forced herself to reply to him.

“Hello, Neville.”

“I know this isn’t my place to say to you, but I wanted you to know how proud of you and Ron I am. I know that it was difficult to face Voldemort. I’m just sorry that I couldn’t have been there with you. Not that I would have been any help, but you know what I mean.”

“Yes, Neville, I do. Thank you for saying that. I’m sorry, but I’m in a hurry, so I have to run.”

Hermione turned to head out of the room, but stopped and looked back at Neville.

“Neville? Do take care of yourself. You’re a good person and a good friend.”

With that she went through the portrait of the fat lady and left Neville sitting there. The hallways were also fairly empty. It was still quite early in the morning and most students were just waking up. She decided the first stop was Myrtle. One last update on what was going on in the forest, just to make sure she had not run into Harry. She ran and felt her muscles immediately respond to her desire to hurry. She ran all the way, until she came to an almost immediate stop as she reached out to push the bathroom door open. She ducked in and quietly called out. Myrtle responded immediately and appeared in front of her.

“Hermione.”

“Myrtle. I’m in a hurry this morning. Any news?”

“Yes, actually. I ran across a small cave up against a hill. It was hidden underneath a rocky overhang and I never noticed it before. I didn’t see anyone inside, but I can tell someone or something has been living there.”

Myrtle gave Hermione an approximation of what direction and how far away it was. She even mentioned a few landmarks that might help her locate the cave.

“I’m going out again right now. I’ve been so bored hiding in here, that I kind of fancy roaming around looking for Harry. It’s something to do.”

Hermione would not have time to wait around for Myrtle, but thanked her for her efforts. She decided not to tell her that she was leaving soon. There was still too much of a risk that she might tell someone, who might in turn tell Dumbledore. She simply could not allow that. Hermione reached her hand out and touched Myrtle where her cheek was and held her hand there as if to stroke it. Knowing she would feel nothing, she did it in hopes of Myrtle recognizing the gesture. With that she left the bathroom and began running to her next destination. Myrtle held her own hand to her cheek and watched sadly as Hermione left her. It was the first time anyone had ever done anything like that for her; even back when she was alive. She wished she could have felt it. It might have been nice.

--- ---

“It doesn’t matter if you think I’m ready or not. I have to go. My time has run out.”

Healer Binns sighed and said, “I have to be honest Hermione. Helping you do this has been my biggest regret. Although, it has been a fascinating experiment to force a drastic change in the way your brain thinks. I’m not sure how it will help you accomplish your goal, but your mind has definitely evolved. Or in this case, more accurate to say devolved. I worry that things moved along so fast. It should have taken months or even years to do what we’ve done. I can only guess that you used magic to help speed things up.” With a sigh she continued, “What I wouldn’t give to be able to learn the outcome of what we’ve done. I wish you well and hope you find what you are looking for.”

“I actually brewed some potions that caused things to go so fast. I had no more time and got a little desperate,” Hermione spoke matter of factly.

“Well, what else can I say, but be careful. I’ll miss you Hermione.”

“Thank you Healer Binns… Goodbye.”

--- ---

It was time to go. She searched her heart to make sure she knew what she was doing. Once she left, there was no turning back. If she found Harry then she would have to do the unthinkable. She loved him. There was no doubt in her mind of that, but that was not the point. He had already killed three good people and she could not risk him killing anymore. Harry was born into misery and found a ray of hope here at Hogwarts. Now, after fate had gotten what it needed from him, he was discarded like refuse and cast out. It was not fair; not at all. Better that Hermione took his life out of love, than let him live buried under his murderous insanity.

She stood at the edge of the forest. Up above, the morning sun was only a quarter of the way through its day’s journey. She breathed in and smelled the fresh spring air. Her whole body was tense with anticipation. There were three clouds up in the sky and four birds flying above the trees. There was a large rabbit nestled inside of a nearby bush, hidden from view. Hagrid had passed by this way, perhaps only a day ago. She could smell that he had carried back a number of herbs from the forest. Nothing stood out as beyond the mere ordinary. Finally, she was ready.

She took quick stock of her direction, adjusted appropriately and then began to run.

--- ---

Ginny ran as fast as she could. She tripped down the last few stairs and picked herself up. She had bruised her shin, but this was no time to worry about that. She held a large roll of parchment in her right hand. Just ahead was the door to Professor McGonagall’s morning transfiguration class. Without hesitation she burst into the room with a loud cry from deep in her throat. The entire class went deathly quiet and they all turned around to see who or what had just barged in. McGonagall opened her mouth to determine why Ms. Weasley had apparently just lost her mind.

“RON! I found this! It’s Hermione, she’s gone!”

Ron stared in shock at his sister, but quickly got his composure, stood up and quickly closed the distance between them. He grabbed the parchment and read the first part:

To those whom I love,

I have so little time left in this world. I have made the hardest, most difficult choice that I will ever have to make. I have been forcing a change in my mind and body. It is because of this that you have all worried so much about me. I know that I must seem insane to you, but please believe me that this decision is not made from mental instability, but from the love in my heart. I am going after Harry ~~~

Ron stopped reading and looked back at Ginny.

“Go and get Luna right now! Meet me near Hagrid’s hut. We have no time at all. GO!”

Ginny spun around and left the room like a whirlwind. Ron quickly looked around the room at his fellow students and then at the gaping mouth of Professor McGonagall. Without a moment’s thought he left as quickly as Ginny. Not a second later he returned and stood up on one of the chairs.

“Listen very carefully to me.”

“Ronald Weasley!” McGonagall said indignantly.

“Shut up!” Ron demanded. “As some of you may now and others may not, Harry did not die after he defeated Voldemort. Some say he lost his mind, others say he turned bad. That doesn’t matter right now. What matters is that one of the most important people who ever stepped foot into this school has committed herself to a suicide mission. Hermione Granger is going after Harry. She will likely get killed by him. I am asking, begging, pleading, or whatever it takes to convince you that we must rise up together and go and get her back. I know that the forest is a scary place, but if we all go together then we will succeed. If there is any shred of goodness in you, then stand up, get your wands ready and follow me.”

With that he turned around and left with a flourish. The class looked at each other. Half of them stood up and began to walk out. Minerva wanted to stop them, but was too dumbfounded to say anything. The other half of the class gained courage at the first half and stood up themselves. As one, they all fell in line behind Ronald Weasley.

Ron wanted to completely break down, but he steeled his heart. He knew he had to keep it together. Hermione needed him. He had let her down in so many ways. He should have forgiven her for the things she had been doing. He knew that she was being slowly driven mad at the loss of Harry. To be honest, so was he. His own suffering prevented him from reaching out to her the way he should have. None of that mattered now. As a matter of fact, nothing at all mattered, except for Hermione.

Ginny had found Luna and saw the small mob that Ron was shepherding down the hallway. The two looked at each other, came to the same realization and began to run into each and every classroom. They were amazed at how student’s simply got up and followed, almost without question. Even the first years could see that history was being made and no one wanted to be left out. There was a battle to be fought. They were tired of their fellow students dying. It was a unity never before seen at the school.

Even the Slytherins joined in, although reluctant at first. The very persuasive Ginny Weasley, lit a proverbial fire under one Draco Malfoy; and of course if Draco was going to get up and go, ‘every’ Slytherin was going to get up and go. Even Neville convinced the Herbology class to bring their wands to the ready. Shortly after the student’s started walking across the grounds, a quick meeting amongst the staff followed suit. All in agreement they took up the battle cry as well. Dobby had even wrangled a dozen of the house-elves to come out of the kitchens. By the time Ron, Ginny and Luna had met up at Hagrid’s hut as promised, there was a veritable army at their command. When Snape tried to convince Dumbledore to bring some order to the ranks, Albus had only one thing to say.

“I do believe Ron Weasley has things quite in order.”

Ron apparated onto the top of the hut and gave a heartfelt speech about how not one more student would be lost to the war against evil. It was stirring and gave the entire school a sense of purpose. Ron’s finest moment had come. He had done the near impossible. He had lifted himself above his status and became a General and this great body of young witches and wizards were willingly under his command. Hermione Granger was not going to die today, as a matter of fact, if Ron had his way no one would.

A scream shattered the morning, “HEEEEELLP!”

All eyes turned towards the forest. There swooping up behind Ron was Moaning Myrtle.

“RON! … RON!” she screamed.

Ron looked over at her with concern.

“Myrtle? What are you doing out of your bathroom?” was the only thing he could think of to say.

“What? Forget that now! Listen to me… all of you listen to me. A terrible mistake has been made. A terrible mistake!”

Ginny lifted her voice, “What on earth is it Myrtle? What mistake?”

“You have to stop Hermione. She’s going to kill Harry!”

“We’re all going to save her,” shouted Neville.

“No, you complete idiots! She’ll be a murderer if you don’t find her before she finds Harry.” Myrtle pleaded.

“No, Myrtle you have it all wrong. Harry is the murderer,” Luna declared.

“No he’s not, he’s not at all. It’s true he has lost his mind, but he’s no killer.”

“Myrtle,” announced Dumbledore, “calm down and try and speak plainly. What are you saying?”

“Harry didn’t kill those three people.”

“Well, then who did?” McGonagall asked.

“The war isn’t over! Harry hasn’t come home yet, because he can’t. He’s still fighting He-who-must-not-be-named. Harry didn’t kill him in that fight. He only weakened him. But every sundown he comes out of the darkness and Harry has to fight him again and again and again. He’s been doing this every night since he disappeared. I never knew it before, because I couldn’t find Harry. Today, I finally found him and he told me everything. I told him Hermione was coming to kill him and he just shook his head and said he didn’t care anymore. He’s tired of fighting a battle he cannot win. So, when Hermione comes he’s going to give up and let her kill him. VOLDEMORT IS GOING TO WIN IF WE DON’T STOP THIS!”

Everyone stood and stared at Myrtle. No one moved and no one breathed. It was so much worse than they ever could have imagined. What could they do? Ron looked down at his army and spoke in a strong, but subdued voice.

“Listen to me. This changes nothing. If the Dark Lord wants a war, then we’ll bring it to his doorstep. Today we will reclaim the forbidden forest. Nothing will stand against us. We will find Hermione, save Harry and then… then we’ll kill that bastard Voldemort once and for all.”

Ron cleared his mind and looked over everyone. He envisioned them as chess pieces, each with their own unique strengths and weaknesses. He had to use them to their best advantage. He needed order and he knew there was no room for mistakes. He clambered down from the hut and began to yell.

“Accio!” from the school swept down his trusty broom. He got on and hovered a few feet above the crowd.

“All students who are on a quidditch team, summon your brooms. You will follow me into the air. We are the lookouts and air support.”

All of the qudditch players yelled ‘accio’ and brooms came flying through the air in an ominous pattern.

Ron continued, “Slytherin and Ravenclaw students! You are our swords and spears. You will be the frontline. You will have all wands at the ready. Anything or anyone who gets in your way, you will deal with it harshly and without second thought. All Hufflepuff students! You are our bow and arrows. You will stay behind, to the left and right of our frontline and provide all ranged support. Anything threatens our students and you blast them from a distance. Gryffindors! You are the protectors. You are directly behind the frontline and will keep shielding spells and protective charms on both frontline and ranged combat students. You are also the de facto medics! Anyone falls then you rush in, drag them out, patch them up and call out for a flyer to bring them back to right here. Teachers listen up! You are my corporals and lieutenants. You provide leadership and help the students to keep in formation and provide field advice. You will also keep in contact with me at all times. House-elves, you are the eyes and ears. Stay in hiding and report anything suspicious to the teaching staff and we will deal with it. If you have any questions, it’s too bad, ‘cause this is war people. Let’s move out!”

Not one complaint, not one second guess. Everyone knew their part and everyone was ready to do whatever needed to be done. This ended here and it ended now.

6. The Nature Of A Woman

The Nature Of A Woman

Even Hermione was amazed at what she had accomplished. Her animal instincts were so strong that she could sense possible threats long before she even got there. Large creatures lumbering through the woods, snakes slithering through the trees, mischievous imps hiding in thorn covered bushes; all of them were smelled, or heard, or felt with enough warning to be avoided all together. In a word, it was exhilarating. She began to wonder just how far her skills could go.

She had been running for over an hour and she had barely broken a sweat. Carefully conserving her energy, she estimated she could keep this pace up for a half day or more. She quickly glanced down at her limber body. Her form was slender, but wiry with muscle. She took an opportunity to run up a large rock and jump off at full speed. She could easily leap three times farther, than when she first started. With each passing step, her belief in herself increased. Hermione knew that she was not invincible, but right now, fear did not weigh her weary soul down.

The wind felt like life sliding across her. She came across a large pond. Rather than avoid it, or stop to drink from it, she dove in. Her arms jutting out and downward caused her to easily slip through the cool wetness. On the other side, without the tiniest hesitation, she kicked her legs out and breached the surface and came bursting out, landing in a half kneeling position on the opposite muddy shore. A gleeful laugh escaped her lips and she began to run again. The water had her clothes tightly sealed to her, but each step shook droplets off and allowed air to coalesce around her. It was only a matter of minutes before she was almost dry.

“I feel so alive,” she screamed out.

For the first time since Harry had left her, things did not hurt. She felt like a whole person. She was almost frightened to stop, for fear that the madness she had left behind would catch up to her. She decided that she would keep running until the horror of it all could not find her anymore. Soon enough, she would have to begin earnestly searching for Harry, but for now she was content with the world. If only Run, Luna and Ginny could be with her now. If only they could run through the wild woods by her side. Then they would understand too.

Up ahead, something had sensed her presence almost at the same time as she had sensed it. Its body was thick and heavy. She could tell by the noise of its footsteps. Something was dragging behind it. Most likely a troll with a fallen branch as a club, she quickly deduced. Sure enough as she began to adjust her course the forest troll came out from behind the trees and started to come after her. She felt she could outrun it, but far better to deal with it now then be woken up by a small tree bludgeoning her to death.

She quickly turned and came to a halt with the thing a mere half minute away. She looked around and picked up two heavy rocks from off the ground. Hermione pulled out her wand and threw one of the rocks up in the air. With a flick and a swish she sent it hurtling right at the troll’s head. It whizzed through the air and stopped with a deep thud as it hit square on the troll’s bony face. Blood immediately came pouring out of its mouth as she had most likely knocked any number of teeth loose. The blow caused the troll to stop and shake its head to deal with the effects of such a well placed blow. Hermione looked the troll up and down.

“Oh, you’re a boy… how awful for you,” she said with a wicked little smirk.

She threw up the second rock and again sent it flying with her wand. This time she aimed it straight for the troll’s groin. Instead of a thud, it made a foul squashing sound. The troll looked at Hermione for a moment, and then the electrical impulses from down below reached its dimwitted brain. A long, low howl came tumbling out of its throat. It then proceeded to bowl over and crash to the ground. It did not move at all. The troll just sat there groaning in agony. It was extremely unlikely this creature would decide it was worth chasing Hermione anymore, even after it was able to finally stand up again. There were far easier meals to be had out here.

She turned back in the direction she had been heading and brought her pace back up to full speed. She needed to cover as much ground as possible before nightfall. There was a sunken meadow a couple of hours away that Firenze assured Hermione was safe to sleep in. Apparently, a pair of old unicorns lived there and they did a good job of scaring off the riff-raff. Hermione thanked her lucky stars that she had not gone and done something rash, like lose her virginity. She would need that, so the unicorns would allow her stay there. Who knew that being chaste would pay off like this? The thought made her laugh out loud as she continued on her journey.

--- ---

“Ho down there!” Ron cried out, “You will let us pass without incident. That is not a request.”

A large group of centaurs had been out hunting when they heard the horrendously loud sound of humans traipsing through the forest.

“This is our forest,” one replied, “and we will defend it vigorously.”

“That’s great and all, but we have an army of about one thousand witches and wizards. If you want to fight, I’d be happy to oblige. Though I fear that there wouldn’t be much left of any of you when we were through.”

One of the centaurs held a large horn up to his ear and listened carefully. He shook his head with amazement.

“We have no choice but to step aside. The flying human is not lying. There is a substantial army headed this way. We will return to the others and warn them of what is coming. It is the better part of prudence for us to stay out of their path.”

With that the centaurs jumped and galloped off in a different direction. Ron was feeling pretty darn smarmy about the whole thing. A whole hunting party of centaurs simply ran off. This boded well for any other nasty surprises that might lie ahead.

Dumbledore sent a suggestion to Ron using a touch of magic, “Ronald, can you hear me? I do believe the troops are getting tired. Perhaps we could stop for a late lunch. Tired soldiers make poor soldiers.”

Ron immediately agreed. He was upset at the slow pace, but he knew he had to keep their morale in mind. He sped across the short distance to the frontline and yelled down to halt the march. The students looked grateful and almost immediately, the teachers and the house-elves began conjuring up tasty rations and pumpkin juice for everyone. There was not a single soul unhappy about the chance to rest and eat.

Ron swooped down to where Ginny and Luna were tending to a few poor students who needed help with mending their shoes or a quick dose of healing potion for the cuts, scratches and bruises. They both knew that even things that were little could affect how someone was feeling. Keeping everyone’s spirits up was imperative.

Luna spied her red-haired lover and smiled warmly at him. His face seemed creased with worry, but he was doing so well leading everyone to save Harry and Hermione. She was so proud, she was sure that her heart was just going to burst right then and there. He never looked as good to her as he did right now. He walked over to her and kissed her quickly on the cheek.

Ginny piped up, “What was all the yelling about up there?”

“There was a group of irritated centaurs nearby. We both agreed today was a bad day for the centaurs to want to vent there frustrations. So, they left.”

“Any sign of Hermione?” Luna asked.

“Not yet, but the house-elves are doing an amazing job of not losing her tracks. The girl is running like a wild horse. And she doesn’t have an army slowing her down. Don’t worry though, we’ll catch her.”

Ginny nodded her head in agreement. She could not let herself believe anything other than they were going to save the day. The alternative was just too awful to consider.

Ginny got up and began to walk around the area. She noticed that Myrtle had not said a thing since her dire warning. She had been silently floating along, always near and yet keeping her distance. It was odd to see and rather sad.

“Myrtle,” Ginny said, “come over here.”

Myrtle quietly floated over and stood a number of paces away.

“No, come here,” Ginny repeated this time pointing right in front of her.

Myrtle slowly came forward with her head looking straight down. It was as if she was somehow afraid of Ginny.

“What’s wrong Myrtle? Don’t be afraid. Why are you acting so nervous?”

“I… it’s just that… well, you remind me of a girl I used to know.”

Ginny smiled, “Really? Were you two good friends?”

“Ummm… no.”

Myrtle was beginning to fidget and looked very uncomfortable.

Ginny immediately realized what was going on. “Was she one of the girls who made fun of you?”

Myrtle began to cry, but said nothing.

“Look at me Myrtle.”

Myrtle lifted her head up.

“I promise you, that I will never make fun of you. Ever. Now come float beside me and keep me company.”

Crabbe wandered by and saw Myrtle. “Ha, ha! You live in a bathroom. You’re crazy. Ha, ha!”

Draco came up behind Crabbe and called out to Ginny, “Hey, Weasley! Is he bothering you?”

Ginny snapped back, “Yeah, he is.”

Draco looked at Ginny, turned to Crabbe and punched him right in the stomach. Crabbe completely caught off guard fell to the ground gasping for air.

“Right,” Draco sniffed and without losing a beat, he simply walked away.

“Well,” Ginny confided to Myrtle, “that was unexpected.”

Myrtle gave a shy laugh and Ginny just stood there with a goofy little grin on her face.

--- ---

Hermione watched as the four foot spider went tumbling down the ravine. There was a pronounced squishing sound as it hit a sharp rock at the bottom. That was the fourth creature she had dispatched this afternoon. She could see there was a noticeable clearing in the forest floor up ahead. She deduced that she had reached her destination. Another minute and she would be in the unicorns’ meadow. The litmus test was if they were there or not. She was starting to feel tired. It had been a long day, and the further she got the more that Harry was on her mind. She hoped that he really had become a terrible beast. It would make it so much easier to do what had to be done.

She could smell a definite equine presence nearby. From what Hagrid had taught her, they would already be very aware of her. She reminded herself, that in spite of what things were in her mind, she was still as yet a ‘fair maiden’.

“Or at least a maiden anyway”, she snorted.

Then the distinct sound of hooves in the grass. There were definitely two of them and they were keeping themselves hidden. Most likely until they knew her intentions.

“Hello out there. I, umm… am Hermione. You probably know my Divination teacher? Firenze? He said, that you might allow me to spend the night safely in your glade. Would that be alright?”

She was not exactly sure why she was saying all that. Unicorns could not talk. She hoped that her calm voice would help them to realize that she was no threat.

“You may enter.”

Hermione did a double take. The voice had definitely come from the direction of one of the unicorns. She slowly walked forward and saw the pair of them standing near. They were old unicorns, she could tell immediately. Though, to the untrained eye any normal person would never know. Hermione could tell by the silver and gray mixed in their tails and manes. Plus, their horns were quite long, which was supposed to be the most accurate way to determine their age. Each curled ring would represent about four or five years, from what she remembered in her studies. That would make them about… she counted quickly, about a hundred and eighty years or so. Almost twice as long as a typical unicorn in this part of the world.

“You can speak,” Hermione asked cautiously.

This time the other one addressed her. “Indeed. We are quite old and so you will find we can do many things beyond what your textbooks tell you, young Hogwart’s student.”

There ability to quickly deduce her origin was impressive. She made a note to not underestimate them. Hermione tentatively reached her hand out towards the closer of the two.

“May I?” she said quietly.

With an upbeat neigh one answered, “You may young maiden.”

The unicorn lowered itself and stretched its head out, so she could reach the horn. Hermione touched it gently and after a moment wrapped her hand around it. She closed her eyes and her mind drifted through happier times. She smiled and opened her eyes again. She studied the horn carefully and thought to herself that it really was a bit phallic to have such a large pointy object adorned on a creature that is supposed to represent innocence, especially in a young woman. A brief flash of Harry came to her mind, but in his case, she wasn’t exactly grabbing the horn. A bright flash of light and heat emanated from the unicorn and it pulled its head back quickly. Hermione stared with an open mouth.

“I know it must be terribly hard with your teenage hormones, but may I advise somewhat less tarnished thoughts while touching a unicorn.”

Hermione was intensely embarrassed. Her face was red and she could feel how hot her cheeks were. She stopped and quickly realized that she had just had a very strong emotion run through her. True it was embarrassment, but she felt it and it was something meaningful. Perhaps there was a grain of hope for her yet.

“I’m so sorry,” Hermione spoke. “I haven’t been myself lately. So, sometimes my thoughts are not my own.”

“It is already forgotten,” the first unicorn said reassuringly.

The second one then spoke, “The darkness will be here soon. It always comes early in this part of the forest. You must stay inside the border of this meadow. Our power will only protect you here. If you leave it, then you will be on your own.”

“I can handle myself,” Hermione said quickly.

The first unicorn snorted with a musical laugh. “Believe me, my young human. The dark brings things that are far more powerful than you. Spiders and goblins are childhood monsters. At night, the monsters of your adult nightmares come out to play.”

She noticed a small pond towards the middle of the glade; she silently walked over and lowered herself down. With her hands cupped she brought the cool water to her lips.

“Bathe in that water when the moon rises. It can heal your wounds,” the second unicorn said cryptically.

“I’m not wounded though,” Hermione said questioningly.

The first replied, “Not all wounds can be seen. Do as you are told and bathe in the water. In the morning everything will be clearer.”

She felt a sense of deep reassurance by their tone. She wandered the meadow until the moon was fully in the night sky. She stepped near the edge of the pond and undressed. The moonlight gave her skin a pale glow. She looked down and could see her reflection. Her face seemed so serious. Her lithe body was almost beautiful in the mirrored pool, she thought. Her breasts cast a seductive shadow beneath them. Then the light picked up just above her navel. Her legs seemed to waver as the spring breeze of night danced across the water. She took a step forward and slipped in without even the smallest splash. Her feet hit the mossy bottom just as the water came up to her neck. She lowered her head in and felt the cool wetness rinse the dust and dirt of the day clean. When she came back up her hair was hugging her head. She ran her fingers through it and stood there mesmerized by the moon’s strange patterns on the pool’s surface.

With each passing moment a little more of her pain melted away. With each moment her life became so much clearer. With each moment the madness drifted from her. She closed her eyes and begged the powers that be.

“Please, please let this be over soon.”

Her love awaited her out in the darkness. For him, she brought a tragic gift. The gift of no more tomorrows. The gift of death.

7. Cast A Shadow Skyward

Cast A Shadow Skyward

Ron had slept little during the long night. He was simply too tense to allow himself to relax. He figured there would be time enough for resting when it was all over. Luna had been nestled in his arms and it made him feel very protective of her. Not that she needed his protection, but nevertheless that was how he felt. He gently laid her head down and pulled himself up. The sun was going to rise soon and he wanted to get an early start. He gathered all the teachers for a quick meeting.

Most of them said nothing and just nodded at his concerns and commands. Dumbledore took Ron aside and offered some advice.

“Ron, I can tell you that our time is very short. Hermione will be finding Harry quite soon. You must get at least a small group there as soon as possible. Perhaps you could send me as well as a select few to see if we can locate them quicker.”

“Hmmm, I would agree with you up to a point. We do need to send a scouting group ahead. However, I need you here. The students are very worried and I can see that whenever I issue an order they turn and look at you for reassuring confirmation. I propose something a little different. I’m going to send the only person I know that either of them would listen to. I’m going to send Ginny. Myrtle will go with her as a guide, since she has an idea of where Harry is. I’ll have one of the Gryffindors give up their broom to her and he’ll take her place on the ground with the others.”

Dumbledore stood there for a moment and ran his fingers down his snow white beard.

“Alright Ron, you are the leader here. We’ll do this your way. Just make sure of what you’re doing before you do it. I don’t think I need to remind you what is at stake here.”

Ron shook his head, “All too well. So, why aren’t you taking over this little army anyways?”

“I have always had a great faith in the student’s at Hogwarts. They always come through in the end. Right now, I fear they have lost faith in their elders. Too many times those in the ministry, their teachers and even myself have failed them. I think they see something in you. You give them a great confidence in themselves. If they were following me, they would not have that. They would merely have confidence in me. I truly believe that their belief in there own ability to shape destiny will give them the courage they need. I fear the worst when we must face Voldemort. Everything will hinge on them stepping up as a unified force.”

“Well, you could kill Voldemort right?”

“Ron, I think you misunderstood all of this. I cannot kill Voldemort. Only Harry can. A prophecy is nothing to take lightly. Our presence will merely be to aid Harry in anyway we can. And of course, to ensure that Hermione is safe as well.”

Ron stared hard at Albus Dumbledore. “You knew that Hermione was going to do this didn’t you?”

“It is foolish to think that I know everything Ron. However, I must admit that I had my suspicions about Ms. Granger. Her grief has been a difficult burden for her. The journey she is on now is about more than just finding and doing what she feels she must. She is on a road to throwing off the awful weight she has been carrying with her since the night that Harry disappeared. On a very deep level, she believes that Harry left because her love was not strong enough to keep him with us. That is why she feels she must be the one to take his life. That way, in her mind, the guilt of murder would be on the soul that caused all of this to exist in the first place. It is a difficult thing to forgive yourself, Ron. Even if it is something that is not truly your burden to carry. Harry is where he is now, because that is how his story was meant to unfold. I believe, in the end, if we all survive, then we will learn what our destiny has in store for us.”

Ron pondered the things that Dumbledore had told him. Some things were beginning to make sense, but he still felt confused. Was this really how it was meant to be? But, why? The answers eluded him. He watched as the student’s were gently awoken by the teachers and house-elves. A warm breakfast had been conjured up and many of them were talking excitedly. What were they doing out here, Ron thought? Why were they following him?

Cho looked up from her circle of Ravenclaw friends; she waved vigorously and yelled out, “Hi Ron! We’re behind you one hundred percent!”

A cheer went up from all the students around her. He felt a lot better after that.

--- ---

Ginny was on the borrowed broom looking over the countryside. She felt a little guilty about leaving the other students behind, but Ron had given her a direct order. She should have been in air support anyway, but she wanted to be near Luna. They had become good friends over the past two years. Her thoughts wandered back to Ron and she laughed. If he had given her an order even a week ago, she would have ignored him or started an argument. Now things were far different. Harry and Hermione needed Ron to do this. It was her duty to help him in anyway that she could.

“The last I saw Harry, he was near a cave about twenty kilometers that way,” Myrtle said with her arm extended out.

“Well, I guess we’d better get moving then. I’ll let Ron worry about Hermione right now. With Luna and Dumbledore there, they should be able to reason with her. Somehow I fear that Harry really needs a friend right now. You ready?”

“Ready!” Myrtle said with no small degree of excitement.

Ginny tipped herself forward and kicked off towards the cave that hopefully Harry was still occupying. It was going to take a bit to get there, so she settled in and took in the scenery around her. A last look back and she saw Ron and the air support students quickly being left behind. Then it suddenly dawned on her. Something had been nagging her for quite awhile, but she could not quite place it. Now, it hit her… where the heck was Hagrid?

--- ---

Hermione had left the meadow and been running for the past hour. When she awoke the unicorns were both there, but said nothing to her. She thanked them and began her journey. Now, here on the hunt she felt her blood begin to pump again. Her steady heartbeat intermingled with the sound of the deep forest. Then it hit her like a physical blow. She could smell him. There was no doubt in her mind at all. She would know that smell as clearly as she knew her own. Harry had been past here. After carefully sniffing at the air, she determined he had come by within the past day or two. She was in his hunting area. It would not be too long before he would know she was there. She held on to the hope that she would be the one to find him first. It could make all the difference.

In the distance she heard a crashing sound as a large limb had fallen from a tree. She stopped and listened for any follow on sounds. There was a flurry of small animals scurrying and a pair of nesting birds chirping loudly as they flew off. She tried to keep her frustration down. The extraneous sounds were preventing her from hearing something that might be important. She was downwind from the direction of the sound, so smell was useless here. She strained to hear anything at all, but there was nothing else. She ran through all the possibilities and settled on the most likely, a dead branch had finally plummeted from its perch.

She again sped out into the wilderness. She was confident that she had run past one of Myrtle’s described landmarks. There was no doubt that she was approaching Harry. She began to wonder if he was happy out in the forest. She had such terrible visions of his life out here, but now that she had embraced this place, she began to think that it was not nearly as bad as Hagrid had made it out to be. There was a reason that the centaurs called this home. She felt that if the opportunity presented itself, she might consider it a home as well. Only time would tell.

She looked up into the brilliant blue sky and slowed down to a jog. She could not remember a time when the sky seemed more azure than it was right now. It almost seemed unnatural to her. Something was wrong. She stopped and tuned all her senses. The sky seemed a bit darker blue than it had just a moment before. She stared hard and could detect a distinct change. It was definitely getting steadily darker. She looked around to find cover. Seeing none she ran towards the nearest tree and climbed it as quickly as she could. Climbing the rope in physical education a few hundred times certainly paid off, she thought. Sitting on the topmost branch that could hold her weight she looked across the forest canopy. The few birds that were in the sky were quickly diving into tree branches. They could sense it too, she noted.

The sky was now the color of late afternoon, though the yellow disk of the sun was just crawling to mid morning. She felt a sense of panic permeate her body. Hermione forced a calmness to wash over her. Her breathing forced to a slow and steady pace. Her heart beginning to slow slightly. The danger of becoming so aware of everything around you, is that when things are not right and you cannot find the source of it, one begins to become overly nervous. After bringing herself back to normal, she could see that now the sky was approximately at early evening. At this rate, it would be completely dark in well under a half hour.

“Is this you Harry? Are you doing this?” she whispered.

She had not planned on having to stop here. She had little in the way of protection against the creatures of the night. This was not good. Not good at all.

--- ---

Ginny was feeling a sense of dread. The sun was still right where it was supposed to be, but it was as if someone were drawing a dark filter over it. The light coming from it was not enough to provide full daylight. So much so, that the sky was practically at twilight. She could actually make out a few evening stars dotting the sky. What was happening?

“Myrtle,” she said in a panic, “have you ever seen anything like this?”

Myrtle was quiet for a moment. “Yes, once before. Quite a few years ago back during the first war against Voldemort. From what I remember, he had discovered a way to cast a spell that would darken the sun over a substantial area, so that it would appear to be night. He only did it one time. I heard Nearly-headless Nick say that it was because it required the sacrifice of a human life, and an enormously large amount of preparation time.”

Ginny looked pensive, “I think I remember hearing that Peter Pettigrew had never been caught. That he had somehow eluded everyone at the ministry of magic. Is it possible that he found Voldemort? Would Voldemort be willing to sacrifice his last death-eater for this? Why would he do that?”

Myrtle had a look of concern, “I know a reason why he would do it. To kill Harry. If he can make it night, then he will be able to come out before Harry is ready for him. Harry said that their battles were so terrible that he needed the whole day to recover. If the Dark Lord were to cut his time short… Ginny… what do we do?”

Ginny was getting angrier by the second. “Myrtle, you need to get to Harry right now! Go to him and warn him. Make sure he’s okay.”

“What about you?”

“You let me worry about myself. You just get to Harry right now and stay by his side. Hurry, Myrtle, hurry!”

With that Myrtle began to speed towards were she had last seen Harry with all the haste her little ghost self could muster. Ginny watched her go and carefully noted the direction she was heading. She had to be able to follow her trail. She watched as Myrtle swooped over the treetops and made mental notes of anything out of the ordinary about the trees themselves, or anything that she could visually lock on to. She carefully committed it all to memory. The sky was awash with dark purples. She guessed that it was about ten in the morning, but the sky said otherwise.

Then in the far distance Ginny saw something very strange. It seemed like the tops of the trees were moving. Some trees seemed to shake, while others were bending over. It seemed to be happening in pockets, but the pockets were not standing still. They were moving and quite quickly. One of the pockets of movement was heading towards an open patch. She squinted her eyes. It was getting much harder to see now as the light in the sky grew dimmer. It was just coming in to view. She could almost make out what it was.

Ginny’s whole body slumped down onto her broom. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. She counted again to be sure, but estimated that there were about fifty of them, maybe more. The death-eaters had been captured and imprisoned, or killed. There was however, another ally of the Dark Lord that appeared to have been forgotten. They were here now though, and Ginny had to get back to Ron and warn him. The giants were coming…

--- ---

The darkness that had settled over the forest had put a severe damper in the ability for the troops to move forward. They had made little progress this morning and he was already about to have to call halt altogether. Ron was furious. If he could find out what was responsible for this unnatural night he would strangle them with his bare hands. He had already had to ground the flyers. He was not willing to risk anyone getting hurt, because they misjudged the top of a tree.

Dumbledore and Snape were both walking quickly towards him. If Snape was concerned about it enough to want to talk to him, he knew it was bad.

“Mr. Weasley,” Snape said with worry in his voice. “We must get some fires lit right away. Firenze just informed me that this is a highly dangerous area at night and even the centaurs avoid it like the plague.”

“He’s right Ron. I believe it is imperative that the safety of the students be our number one priority,” Dumbledore added.

Ron was not about to throw the towel in now. Harry and Hermione needed him. He asked Dumbledore to make sure that all the students could hear him clearly. Dumbledore cast a quick Sonorus spell on Ron.

“Everyone, please listen to me. As you all have probably guessed Voldemort is behind the sky turning to night like this. I can only believe that it is because he is planning something. I fear the worst, but I simply cannot allow him to win. I have been told that I should put your safety first. I agree with that. I however, cannot stay here and let this happen. Fires will be started and around the clock guard duty will be carried out until it is light again. You will be safe here. If there are any of you who wish to press on with me, then I would welcome you by my side. Those of you who wish to stay behind, then please get your assigned duties from McGonagall. She will be heading up the effort to setup camp. If any of you wish to see this through, then simply stay here with me.”

Ron waited patiently for the students to begin forming groups around McGonagall. No one seemed to be moving. Ron continued to wait.

“Um, yes just to clarify. If you wish to stay here then form up near McGonagall and we’ll get fires started and…”

“We heard you the first time!” Seamus yelled.

“We’re with you Ron!” yelled Neville.

Cho did as well, “You know where we stand Ron Weasley. We’re here to see this to the end.”

“Yeah, what she said!” barked Draco.

“Right then,” Ron said. He hid it well, but on the inside he was feeling pretty emotional about the whole thing. “Wands out!”

Each and every student pulled their wands out.

“Together now! Lumos!” Ron ordered.

A thousand voices cried out in unison, “LUMOS!”

In this small portion of the forest, there was a glow bright enough to light up half of London.

--- ---

Hermione was still clinging to the tree as the sky turned dark as midnight. She was sure that she would hear the movement of nocturnal hunters coming out to find prey, but there was nothing. The forest was silent.

Then a sudden bolt struck her. She could smell Harry. His scent was very strong and very near. She could not see him or hear him, but she knew. She slowly slid her wand out and she waited. Sooner or later he would show himself, or make a noise giving him away. When he did, she would be ready for him. Now, it was just a matter of time.

8. A Light To Find Their Way

A Light To Find Their Way

Ron and the other quidditch players were back up on their brooms. With the immense light pouring from all of the wands, they were able to fly as long as they stayed in the general vicinity of the students on the ground. Under the circumstances, the progress they were making was excellent. The house-elves simply had an uncanny ability to find someone when they set their mind to it. They informed Ron, that they were convinced that Hermione was only about an hour in front of them. It was hard to stay calm.

He swooped in and out of the nearby trees, sort of making a game of it. It kept him distracted from the task at hand. Which was to figure out how to stop Hermione without hurting her. She was most likely going to fight tooth and nail; Ron hoped that was not going to turn out literally. There were a lot of students here and a lot of mistakes can be made when there are so many pieces on the board. When they got closer he would have instructions sent around to hold any spells from firing, until he gave the order. The sun appeared to be approximately overhead; not that it made any difference.

Draco had flew up to Ron and asked if he had heard anything from Ginny. He was a bit taken aback that he would even care. Apparently, Malfoy was beginning to think past his own circle of influence. It was not much, but maybe, just maybe someday down the road, Draco would stop being such a complete ass. Ron was not going to hold his breath, though.

McGonagall had just received word from the elves that they found a large tree that Hermione had apparently been in for quite sometime. She had since moved on, but whatever happened it kept her there for awhile. Ron assumed that it was the darkness that had caused her to worry. If it was him, he would have done the same thing. When you have no cover, then a good lookout is the next best thing.

Ron decided to fly down to where the elves were congregating and see if he could get any more details. He set down just few meters away. Luna was already standing there. She was smart enough to know when Ron would think it important enough to check on things. She had a worried look on her face as he approached. Ron noted that Dobby looked very unhappy as well.

“What do we know?” Ron asked.

Luna gave Ron the condensed version. “Hermione was definitely here, but there’s more. We see another set of tracks nearby that headed off to the north. All of the house-elves agree that they are Harry’s tracks. Hermione’s tracks area definitely following after Harry’s. It seems that she has either found him, or is very close to finding him. There’s no way we can get there before her.”

“Then, we’ll need to hurry. They both need us and it’s only a matter of time before Voldemort finds them both. All we can do is hope that we get there before Hermione kills Harry, or Voldemort kills both of them. Let’s keep moving people!”

With that order the army set out again at a very fast pace. Time was of the essence.

--- ---

Ginny was desperately trying to locate Ron and the rest. She had to warn them. From her estimation the giants would be arriving in the area that Myrtle had flown off towards at about the same time that the Hogwart’s students would. If they were caught off guard then there was no telling what the outcome would be. The only problem was that it was so incredibly dark. She could not see where she was going or where she had been. Ginny strained her eyes to make out what was in front of her. She had her wand out earlier, but the little amount of light it was giving off only made it harder to see over distances. Her night-vision was just too compromised by it to be helpful.

Then just as she was starting to feel things were getting hopeless, she saw it. There was a beacon of light that had erupted far south from her. She figured it could only be one thing, so she aimed her broom in that direction and sped there as fast as she could go. Her eyes began to water from the wind whipping in her face. She could not let that bog her down, so she wiped them the best she could and pressed on. She only hoped that when she got there, that Ron would be able to think of what to do. Giants have been fighting the magical community for a long time. It was obvious that they posed a serious threat as many witches and wizards had died in the battles they had fought against one another. They would need a plan; a way to catch the giants off guard.

Suddenly, a sharp pain went through Ginny’s head and chest. Then a sensation of falling followed by a crunching thud sounding in her ears. Shortly after, she could feel awful pain coming from her left arm and left leg. She realized that she was no longer flying. Instead, she was looking straight up into the night sky from the cold, hard ground. She felt around with her right hand and discovered the partial remains of her broom. Looking around her, it was obvious that she was at the base of a very large tree. She must have hit the top of it when she started bringing her altitude down to keep her broom in line with the light. She tried to pull herself up, but her leg was not responding. She tried to feel it with her left hand, but it would not move either. Then, she gently probed her left side with her right hand. Her arm was definitely broken and her left leg was lying at a very strange angle. The pain was shooting through her whole body and made her feel dizzy and a little nauseous.

Ginny could not find the strength to even roll herself over. In a panic she reached into her robes and let out a little cry of anguish. Her wand had fallen out of its pocket. There was nothing she could do. She thought about yelling out, but knew that would likely bring unwanted attention. She was still a long way off from the light of Ron and Luna. All she could do was just lie here and wait, for whatever was going to happen. Her imagination started running wild and it was getting hard to keep the panic from overwhelming her.

There was the sound of a breaking stick in the distance. Then another followed shortly after, this time closer. Something had found her. After a moment, Ginny realized that it was not one thing, but many. She could hear heavy thudding sounds coming from all directions. She tried to turn her head, but pain shot up her back and her neck stopped responding. She was going to die and would not even know what killed her. A whimper escaped her lips and tears of fright began to roll down her cheeks. Ginny Weasley was a brave young woman, but of all the things she was ready for, dying was not one of them.

A harsh voice came from one of them, “It’s wounded. What should we do with it?”

“Pick it up. We’ll take it with us,” came a second voice, even raspier than the first.

“It’s a girl-child from the school,” a third voice spoke.

The first voice replied, “Look, a wand. It must belong to this one. We’ll take it with us as well.”

The second voice responded, “I’ll take the child.”

The pain was so excruciating now that Ginny could no longer see anything. She felt a pair of arms pick her up. Then with one last cry of pain, everything turned black.

--- ---

Harry was very fast. Hermione had a difficult time not losing him in the forest. As fortune would have it, he was doing nothing to hide his tracks. It was easy to follow him. She assumed he was heading back to his cave. It was a stroke of luck that he never found her. Now, she would take the fight back to his cave. She would let him go in and feel safe and then crawl inside, in silence. He would never know what hit him. She could not risk a face to face confrontation. Harry was deadly with his wand and she was not about to attempt a dual of magic. This was to be a dual of wits, and she had no doubt that she would win that fight.

Then it hit her like a ton of bricks. How was she going to kill him? A spell? Which one? Or would she simply snake in and kill him with a weapon of some sort, or perhaps with her bare hands? The thought of taking his life with her own hands made her shudder. That was too personal. She would never be able to go through with it. It would have to be by magic. Perhaps a curse. It really would not matter if she used an illegal spell. As long as she could stop Harry’s insanity; then whatever the consequences, it would be worth it. Not to mention, how likely was it that the ministry would risk coming into the forest to arrest a girl who had stopped a madman?

She liked being able to smell him. It was sort of calming in a strange way. Almost as if he was with her again, like it was before. She hoped that if she were to ever meet him in the next life then he would understand that she was doing this out of love. If her love was not enough to keep him with her and sane, than it was at least enough to stop him from doing anything further to hurt himself or others. Hermione stopped and noticed a strange bush that had appeared to be growing out of a split rock. It was one of the final landmarks that Myrtle had told her about. She was less than a quidditch pitch away from the cave. Harry’s scent was very strong now. He would be inside, no doubt.

She followed his trail up to a large hill. There on the face of it, was a crooked little cave entrance. If she had stumbled through here a month ago, she would never have even seen it. But now, she could not miss it. It was obvious that something was living inside as there were numerous tracks leading in and out, many of them quite fresh. There was even a small circle of stones hidden from sight. That would be where he would most likely light fires on the coldest nights. The thought of him being cold made her sad. The idea of Harry suffering made her deeply unhappy. That was part of the reason she was here now. To take his suffering away.

There was a voice coming from inside the cave. It was not Harry though; it sounded like a female voice. She was too far away to be able to make out what was being said. A strange surge of jealousy swept through her. What woman was out here in the forest with Harry? Why was she talking to him? What were they doing together? That thought made her angry and afraid. It broke her concentration and brought out the wild in her. She was not going to share her mate with another female. She would kill her if she had to; anything to keep Harry to herself.

Hermione shook her head violently. What was she saying? Her mate? Harry was not her life-mate. They were merely hunting partners. No, that was not right. Not hunting partners. Not hunters… friends… that was the word she was trying to think of… everything seemed so confusing. He was her friend… she had come here to kill her friend. Why was she going to kill him again? She tried to remember. Yes, he was no longer able to separate good from bad. He had killed innocents… he was insane… or was it that she was insane… it was hard to keep things straight. She had to hurry and do this, before she forgot again. Time was short. She was not feeling like herself… whoever that was, or is. Why was it so hard to think clearly?

She began to run the short distance to the cave entrance. There was a flickering light coming from inside. She pulled out her wand and ran in to face Harry and this other woman. Bursting into the flame lit cave she spied Harry. He was sitting on a flat rock and facing a small fire. He looked entranced by the flames. There was a figure near him. It was someone she remembered. She tried hard to think. It was Myrtle. Yes, it had to be her, she was a ghost. That made her feel better. Ghosts cannot mate, so Harry would not have settled down with another female. Not… that it mattered… she reminded herself. She was here to kill him. Myrtle looked up and saw Hermione. She said nothing, but Hermione could tell she had been crying. Why was Myrtle here? Why was Harry not looking at her? He must know she was here.

“Harry… I’ve come for you.”

Hermione had her wand out, but she could not remember a single spell. Not one. She knew that she should remember some, but none of the words came to mind. She threw it down in disgust and started to circle Harry’s position with her hands extended out like claws. She would do whatever it took. She loved him that much. As she came around, ready to pounce, he looked up at her. She could see his green eyes looking back; it made her pause. There was something significant in his eyes. But, what was it? Then she saw it. What she had been expecting to see was not there. His eyes were clear. She saw no trace of insanity there. That was not right. Why did he not have claws? His mouth opened as if to say something, but then he closed it again. His teeth, looked almost normal, a bit rough, but not jagged at all. Was he not supposed to look like that? Or was that just her dreams?

Why was he not saying anything? Why was Myrtle silent?

“Myrtle? Tell me what is going on here.”

She opened her mouth, but then closed it as well. They were staying silent on purpose, Hermione noted. Why was Harry not preparing to defend himself?

She leapt forward and lunged at Harry’s face. Her nails sliced across his cheek and drew blood. He lifted his hand and touched it. Something was wrong. He was going to let her kill him. Myrtle seemed so upset that she turned and floated out of the cave, leaving Harry and Hermione alone in this place.

Harry stood up with his arms at his sides. He looked so much like he did, before he left. There were subtle differences though. His eyes were not bright anymore. The green had turned as dark as the ocean on a cloudy day. He had scars all over his arms and neck. There was no trace of happiness in his face at all. Only pain and loneliness could be found there.

“You left me,” Hermione said in a quiet, accusing tone.

He did not answer.

“Why did you go?”

He just stared at her.

“Why was my love not enough for you? You should have stayed with me. I needed you Harry. Didn’t you need me?”

She wanted to cry, or to be angry, but instead all she could do was feel swallowed up by her hurt. She looked up and Harry had closed the gap between them. He was standing so close to her, that she could hear his heartbeat. His face was next to hers. She could see how lean his body was. He had not been eating well. Again, pain washed over her. He needed her to take care of him, but she had not been there. She reached her hand up towards the cut in his face. For a moment, she was not sure if she was going to attack him or touch him.

He leaned in and kissed her. The feeling went straight down to her toes. His arms wrapped around her body. She took both of her hands and put them around his back and clasped them together. She began to cry and her sobs were silenced in his throat with their lingering kiss. She could feel tears on his cheeks. He grabbed her clothes and began to roughly strip them off of her. She let it happen. There was no one else in the world she would let see her this way. She began to tear his clothes off of him as well. His whole body was covered in bruises and gashes. Some of the wounds had healed and some had not. What had he gone through out here?

His hands were touching her all over. Each place he brushed against made her feel painfully alive. Her hands searched his frame. She felt every inch of him and it was exactly as she knew it would be. His mouth lowered to her breasts and she held his head there in her arms. There was no doubt now of what was going to happen. They were going to be with each other, right here. He was claiming her as his mate and she wanted nothing more than exactly that. It all felt so right to her. This was what she really needed from him. His total and complete acceptance of her, the way she had always accepted him.

He lowered her body to the ground and she arched her back with her hands behind his neck. She spread her legs and felt his naked body against her. He was ready to take her and her body screamed for it. She had deemed him worthy to be her only one. She was the kind of animal who chose a mate and kept him for life. She would accept nothing less and somehow she knew he would give nothing less. Hermione felt him inside of her and for some reason the world became a little less confusing. She had come to conquer him, but without a word she let him conquer her instead. She closed her eyes and lost herself in the feeling. It hurt a little, but there was a primal pleasure to it all.

Nearby, Myrtle floated into the cave. She was surprised by what she was watching. She had assumed that one of them would be dead by now, but not this… If she were alive her face would have turned bright red. However, she was quite dead, so instead she just sat there and watched.

9. The Hunter And The Hunted

The Hunter And The Hunted

“Did you feel that,” Snape asked.

“Yes, I did indeed,” Dumbledore replied.

“Albus?” McGonagall queried.

The children were muttering amongst themselves. They were getting worried. It was time for Ron to address them again. A good leader always talks to their troops in time of worry. It helps them feel more secure in an unsecure world. Before Dumbledore could say a word, Ron had already landed his broom and was preparing to speak.

Ron had seen an open area directly to the north of the troops. The house-elves were starting to get excited, and felt they were very near their destination. It was time for him to make sure he kept all the students in check. The Slytherins would be the toughest. He knew that they would be best suited in front, in the thick of things, but it could also play against them if they acted rashly. His next thought made him want to hit something, hard. However, he knew that there was no time for the bitter past. He was not about to allow his own personal hatreds get in the way of finding Harry and Hermione.

“Hmmm, maybe I’m starting to grow up a little bit here. Too bad Hermione isn’t around to see it,” he said under his breath. The thought even made him smile a bit. Oh, how things have changed.

“Draco,” the name stuck in his throat. “come here, we need to discuss something.”

Malfoy looked up at Ron as if to say something. A number of Slytherins were gathered around him. Each of them waiting to see what snide comment he was about to unleash. Even Ron had his doubts this was going to go well. How was he going to deal with him being openly rebellious? It was the last thing he needed, but he had no choice.

Each and every person within hearing distance had their jaws wide open. Draco Malfoy looked around and then back at Ron.

“Yeah. I’m on my way.”

Ron did everything in his power to not look surprised. Malfoy walked up to him and his eyes bore right into Ron.

“Don’t think I’m doing this for you Weasley. I happen to believe that there are other things that are more important right now. My reasons for doing what I’m doing are my own. Just except it and move on.”

“Alright Draco, fair enough. I know that some of the Slytherins are… anxious for what’s coming. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Even you. As a side note, I really cannot believe that I’m saying that. Anyway, you hold a huge influence over them. I’m asking you to please do whatever it takes to keep them calm. When all this is over we can go back to hating each other, but right now… neither of us can afford that.”

“Oh, I hate you right now Ron. Have no doubt of that. You do have a point though. I enjoy my little Slytherin kingdom and I would hate to lose any of my dedicated followers. Until this is over, a truce. Don’t worry, we’ll tow the line here, until we get back and then it’s business as usual.”

“Right,” replied Ron.

Malfoy turned around and walked back over to his fellow students. Some of them still had their mouths hanging open and Crabbe always seemed to rub his stomach a lot when Draco was around. They were still afraid of him and probably always would be. Kind of sad really, a lonely king over his dysfunctional subjects. Ron had no time to think through such things. He needed to address everyone and get them feeling positive again. He was convinced that morale would make them or break them.

Ron nodded his head to Luna and she pulled out her wand and stated, “Sonorus!”

Ron’s voice could be heard by everyone. All eyes were on him.

“Listen up! We are only minutes away from our destination, according to the house-elves. I need each of you to remain calm and focused. We have two lives depending on how we handle ourselves out here today. Up until now, you have been nothing short of exemplary. I’m proud of each and every one of you. It’s time to finish this and go back home, so let’s do just that. I want you to keep your wands ready, but more importantly your eyes open. Listen to the teachers heading up your group. I’ll be relaying orders to them and they’ll pass them on to you. The sounds we are hearing are most likely Harry and the Dark Lord fighting. This is our moment. Take it… and make it your own.”

He jumped back on his broom and kicked off. The troops seemed to be energized. They were focused. They were ready.

Then all hell broke loose.

--- ---

Ginny could feel the pain shooting through her arm and leg. It was like nothing she had ever felt before. Her back had become completely numb and felt ice cold. Something was very wrong with her body. She began to sob in agony. Then she felt a drop of water on her forehead and then another. She tried to open her eyes, but they were so dry it felt like they were glued shut. Her own voice sounded foreign to her.

“Please… help… me.”

“Now, now Ginny Weasley. You’re safe now. I’m takin’ you to Madame Pomfrey right now. She’ll fix you right up.”

The voice sounded familiar to her. So warm and safe.

“I’m dying,” she whispered.

“I won’t let that happen you hear. I just won’t.”

It was so difficult to talk. “Must warn… Ron… Giants, coming.”

“That’s none of your concern now. You were lucky as a unicorn, you were. The centaurs found you and brought you to me. I was busy trying to make inroads with their elders and had a great breakthrough. Everything will work out just fine. You’ll see.”

More drops of water fell on her nose and cheeks. It took almost everything she had, but she forced her eyes open. Tears were streaming down his cheeks and falling like rain.

“Hagrid. I’m scared.”

“To be honest there Ginny, I’m a bit scared myself. Believe me I would like to be out helping Ron find Harry and Hermione, but I happen to know for a fact that if I didn’t rush you back to safety, then Dumbledore would never forgive me. I don’t think Ron would neither. So, here I am. Carrying you home; and it’s a great honor to be doing so.”

Ginny began to cry, but this time with relief. She was going home. Even if she died on the way, at least she would not be alone.

--- ---

Myrtle could not help but watch. To see what she would never have. Love. People always wondered why she was so batty. Rejection and heartache will do that; especially when it is all you have ever known. Even when her father found out she was haunting Hogwarts after her death, he never came to see her. Not even once. What kind of father would do that? She knew her mother would have come, but she had died when she was little.

There on the other side of the room was Harry and Hermione. Both of them were terribly scarred on the inside. Both of them confused about their place in the world. In the end though, they had each other. Harry had made her promise not to say anything to Hermione. He said he was going to be killed either by Hermione or Voldemort. He would rather die by Hermione’s hand. Myrtle guessed that she could sort of understand that. Then something changed. She could hear Hermione asking Harry some painful questions and the next thing she knew they were in each other’s arms. Myrtle had asked the same questions about her own family. How come her love for them was not enough to make them want to come and see her? Maybe it was because her love was not strong enough. Maybe it was because theirs was not. Either way it made her desperately sad to think about.

She took no pleasure in watching them make love. The only pleasure she found was that sometimes, in the most unlikely of places, love comes to save you. She knew that Harry had no idea of how bad off Hermione had been. Of course, Hermione had no idea of what burden Harry had been bearing all alone out here in the unforgiving wilderness. Myrtle wondered if love would ever come to save her. Then she began to cry. Someone would have to love her for that to happen, and no one in this world did. With that thought she drifted out into the forest. No one at Hogwarts ever heard from her again.

--- ---

Harry looked down at Hermione. She was this intoxicating mixture of fierce animal and a strangely delicate flower. She smelled like leaves and grass. Her hair was like a honeyed mane, so desperately out of control. Her skin had turned a sweet shade of reddish-brown from the unforgiving sun. Her body was slender, but the muscles in her legs were like a long distance runner’s. Just looking at her was exhilarating. Within a few minutes he was already deciding whether or not they could have sex again. He wanted her so badly. He thought for sure that kissing her was going to be the last thing he did in this life. He was shocked that she responded so strongly. A raw feeling of need seemed to explode out of her. Before he knew what he was doing, he started tearing her clothes off. He had the most overwhelming desire to see her skin, her breasts, her stomach… all of her. Once he saw her then his mind simply went blank and the only thing he felt was a gripping need to be with her. Love was there, but something else was too. She made him feel… wild. Like a beast of the Forbidden Forest, taking a female of his kind. It made him feel an incredible sense of power, but at the same time strangely vulnerable. At any time she could have chosen to reject him, but instead she accepted him; without question and without reservation.

“I love you,” Harry whispered. “At least I think. I’m not completely sure what love is, but if it’s anything, than it must be this.”

Hermione looked up at his face. She had her hand pressed against his chest and was drawing lines along the contours of his wiry body. She wanted to mate with him again. She wanted him to keep taking her, until she was carrying his child. Then her mind went flashing backwards in time. She felt herself staring into a dim mirror in a dark room, back at school. There in the mirror she could see herself… pregnant… with Harry’s dark figure standing behind her. Holding her. Her desire was coming true. She thought about how strange that truly was.

“Harry, did you kill those three people?”

“What three people? I’m pretty sure that I haven’t killed anyone. What are you talking about?”

“The three people they sent to find you.”

“Hermione, no one has ever found me. Well, not until Myrtle came along. And, well, I guess then you, but you know what I mean.”

“Then who killed them?” Hermione asked.

“My guess is Voldemort did.”

“What?!” Hermione said sharply.

“Voldemort. He’s still out here. We fight each other every night. I thought everyone knew that.”

Hermione’s mind short circuited. Everything was turned upside down. Everything she had done, everything she had prepared for was an illusion. It was all an illusion that she had created from the darkest recesses of her mind.

“Harry, there’s something you need to know about me.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve lost touch with everything. I’ve… I’ve gone mad. I think I’m broken inside.”

Harry looked at her and a deep sorrow welled up in his heart.

“It doesn’t matter. As long as you’re with me, nothing else matters at all.”

Hermione’s mind snapped shut like a steel trap. “Harry! You said that you fight every night! That’s why it’s dark. He made it dark. He’s coming for you!”

Harry looked at her with soft eyes, “I know.”

“Good. That will make it so much easier. I see you’ve brought a little friend Harry. Shall we dance?”

Hermione looked up and saw a hideous caricature of a human. His grey fleshy skin looked sallow and sickly. His eyes were a strange mottled yellow. Voldemort was a lot of things; however, alive was not one of them.

--- ---

The giants had come storming out of the darkness. There was so many of them. They were as tall as the trees and frighteningly strong. Some of them had whole tree trunks and were swinging them like massive clubs. Others had grabbed huge rocks and were throwing them long distances, like immense catapults. Three students died and twice that were wounded even before Ron knew what hit them. He immediately began to bark out orders. He closed the ranks and got everyone into their positions. The Gryffindors immediately began to put up protective charms. Those who had fallen were quickly dragged back to safety. Dumbledore and Snape were like a howling thunderstorm, as spells came crackling from their wands. The Slytherins were using every dirty trick and nasty curse they could think of and the Ravenclaws were blasting away at close range. The Hufflepuffs were casting arrow charms and crying out ‘accio’ as they hurled whatever objects were lying around at the giants. They had already killed two of them, but more and more were pouring out of the trees. Then things took a terrible turn. A number of the giants had magical artifacts. Most likely gifts from Voldemort in exchange for their allegiance. One had a crystal crown that would shoot out flames in a wide arc, fanning out and setting everything nearby on fire. Before long a whole section of forest was ablaze.

Ron ordered the quidditch flyers to cast the rope charm and circle around the giants. The bigger they are the harder they fall, and once they were wrapped tight around the legs, down they went. Three more giants had been killed or incapacitated. Ron jerked around to see how many wounded there were now. He counted twelve wounded and possibly four more were dead. This was not how it was supposed to go. They were supposed to be an invincible army. The dead student’s lying in their own blood, told him a far different story.

Ron clenched his jaw and began to swoop here and there, yelling for one group to back up another. He ordered a large number of the Gryffindors to join with the Hufflepuffs in volleying attacks. The other Gryffindors he ordered to concentrate all their charms and spells to aid the frontline Slytherins and Ravenclaws.

Dumbledore had squared off with the giant who had the fire crown. Snape had charged one who had a massive ice spear. McGonagall was transfiguring each and every little thing she came across into sharp objects, so the Hufflepuff students had better ammo to accio at the enemy. Then it hit Ron, he still had another group to help in the fight. He yelled out for Dobby and instructed him to take the house-elves around behind the giants and start fighting and creating as much confusion as they could. It would most likely disorient the giants to have to fight on more than one side.

In spite of it all, the wounded students were beginning to grow at an alarming rate. And for every giant down, three more came bursting out. They were in deep trouble. He began to wonder if he needed to call a retreat, if there would even be anywhere for them to run to.

--- ---

Myrtle had wandered by a small pond. There in the darkness she could make out the forms of two beautiful unicorns. She floated down towards them and quietly hid up in the tree canopy. They were prancing around a quiet glade. Both of them seemed so wise and graceful. She so wished she could be wise and graceful. Neither one of those terms really suited her. One of the unicorns looked up and noticed her.

“Hello Myrtle.”

“He... hello,” she replied in a shaky voice.

“Tell me dear ghost. What is it you are looking for?”

“I just want to go home, but…” she began to cry again, “I have no idea of where that is.”

The second unicorn neighed and replied, “Turn around little lost one and find your way.”

Myrtle slowly turned around as she felt a warm light fall across her shoulders. She looked into it and saw someone standing there.

“Mommy?”

“My sweet, silly Myrtle. Don’t you think its time you left this cold world behind? You’ve been holding on to your anger and hurt for too long. Come here; come with me. I’ll take you away from all this.”

Myrtle drifted towards her. Her mother reached her hand out and touched her tenderly on the cheek, and this time she could feel it.

--- ---

They were going to lose. The giants had too many powerful wizard artifacts and their numbers kept increasing. He figured there had to be sixty or more. Dumbledore had killed nine of them on his own, but even he was getting worn out from the sheer speed and ferocity of the attack. He had quickly scouted the area and found nowhere to run to and nowhere for them to hide. They were going to die out here in this forest and he simply did not have the power to save them.

He could not give up. He refused to. He needed a diversion. Something to get the giants occupied long enough so he could re-gather their forces and attack as a single force, rather than scrambling around in small groups.

Ron turned his head around as the sound of hundreds of galloping hooves crashed through the forest nearby. They were headed this way. He flew up a bit higher to see if he could make out what was happening. Then he saw them. Leaping into the battle, dozens at a time. Each of them with swords and crossbows. The bolts they were using were covered in dark pitch. Each of the centaurs ran past one who was holding a torch. Then volleys of flaming missiles came arcing into the dark sky. It was the most beautiful thing Ron had ever seen.

Behind them, Grawp came lumbering out of the surrounding night. He had the most amazing thing with him. A massive blow dart, roughly the size of a sewage pipe. He reached into a bag and pulled out one of dozens of long darts. It was dripping with some kind of pungent poison. He slipped it into the tube and blew fiercely. The dart went hurling into the rampaging giants and hit one square in the chest. Not ten seconds later the giant was on the ground dead as a doornail.

Things were beginning to look up. Ron collected his thoughts and then he could see the final moves in front of him. He had it now.

“Checkmate,” he grinned.

10. Tragedy Is The Color Of The World

Author’s Note: I warned you at the beginning. Don’t feel bad if you hate it… so do I.

Tragedy Is The Color Of The World

The last of the giants had fallen. The casualties were great on all sides. Eighty-seven giants, to the last, had been slain. Forty-three centaur bodies lay mangled on the field.

Twenty nine students…

…

killed.

…

One hundred and eight more were wounded.

…

Ron looked across the bloody battleground.

“What have I done?”

Ron landed on his knees next to the bodies lain so carefully in rows.

“I am a madman…”

His fists clenched so tightly that blood ran from where his fingernails dug into his palm’s flesh.

“… I am a fool!”

He wept and the tears fell to the earth.

Luna stood a footstep away. How do you console a man who led lives to victory and death? How do you console a boy who saw people he laughed and cried with through seven years, murdered before his eyes? How do you console a soul torn asunder by horrible loss?

She rested her hand on his neck and ran her fingers through his sweat soaked hair. Perhaps you cannot. Perhaps all you can do is simply stand next to them and watch them grieve.

--- ---

Hagrid stared hard at Madame Pomfrey.

“What do you mean? That can’t be right… Try again…”

“I’m sorry Hagrid. It is beyond a healer’s capabilities. Her back and neck were broken. The bones are literally crushed. She has lost more blood than a body can lose and still function. There’s simply nothing I, or anyone else can do.”

Ginny looked up at Hagrid and choked out a soft whisper, “my … friend”

She closed her eyes and died in his arms.

--- ---

Dumbledore and Dobby ran towards the entrance to the cave. They were almost there.

Suddenly Hermione stumbled out. Her naked body was torn. Her right arm broken at the shoulder and dangling lopsided at her hip. A deep gash in her head dripped blood upon her face, her shoulders, her breasts…

A few feet in front of Dumbledore she collapsed in exhaustion and agony. Her weak voice could barely be heard.

“He died… he died…

… what will happen now…”

Dumbledore felt tears brimming from his eyes. He reached down and touched her wrist. Her heart was still beating. Terribly weak… but she was still among the living.

Snape was coming up from behind.

“Severus, you will bring Ms. Granger to Madame Pomfrey immediately. Do you understand?”

“Of course.”

Without a word Snape lifted Hermione into his arms and turned and walked away.

“Dobby. You will wait here.”

“Of course, yes I am happy to do as you say.”

Albus steeled his heart and walked inside. His eyes were closed so very tightly. For what he knew he would see. For what he had to face. This is not the happy ending he had always hoped so deeply for. Fate had not been a kind mistress.

Inside, he felt the cool shadows against his wrinkled face. The room smelled of blood and death. He opened his eyes slowly…

…

There destiny stood in the darkness.

…

A bruised and broken form lying on the ground. Far beyond any imagined chance of survival or rebirth.

…

Kneeling above the figure, covered in tears and blood was Harry. His head in his hands sobbing. It was over now. It was over…

--- ---

Time had passed and the twilight of years had befallen two ancient unicorns in a deep and magical forest. They both lay their bodies onto the ground and closed their weary eyes together. This world was too great a burden. Two enchanted beasts journeying toward the last great adventure. If you looked closely two spirits pranced into the wide sky, next to them was the slight figure of a red-haired girl dancing toward heaven.

--- ---

Many months had come and gone. Hermione had not spoken since that day. The smart and pretty girl, turned mad, turned wild… was now but a broken shell. When Luna looked into her eyes, she saw nothing at all.

Harry had disappeared into the wilds after the battle was over. No searching revealed anything about him or where he might have gone. Dumbledore had sent not tens or hundreds, but thousands who had gathered and they walked from one end of the forest to the other. Not a single trace of him was found.

Luna held Hermione’s hand in this small room. Outside was darkness and the cold breath of autumn’s November winds. Luna wore a simple, but beautiful ring. She was as happy as it was possible for her to be, that she was engaged to Ronald Weasley. He was everything she had ever hoped for. Though he never smiled anymore. What price to pay to overthrow the Dark Lord of shattered dreams…

--- ---

The crescent moon had risen high into the sky. Luna had fallen fast asleep by Hermione’s side. The small window slowly slid open and he slipped inside. His body now healed, his strength now returned. He quietly stepped towards her sleeping form.

“I’ve come for you Hermione.”

He lifted her up. Her eyes opened and she saw him there. No words came out, but there was a sparkle that had not been there for so very long. Harry had finally come for her. The wounds would never truly be gone, but together they would somehow survive inside of these broken lives.

Luna awoke just as the two lovers disappeared forever. She let out a small smile and watched the ‘wild’ carry them away.

--- ---

Closing Notes: Did you see it coming? Did you know how it would end? Do we ever truly see how the story will end, or do we just put words to paper and somehow hope that when the last page is written, we will find happiness, some sense of closure… if not in this life, then perhaps in the next.

To those of you who believe that there is nothing past the veil of death… I tell you that there is… there must be… nothing else makes sense in this world gone mad.