That time of the Month

diggingupophelia

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 15/10/2004
Last Updated: 15/10/2004
Status: completed

My respose to an older challege I read on the forums. The title kind of speaks for itslef. Read and Review. Glitch all fixed, it is not hard to read anymore! I've decided to leave this as a one shot...

Chapters

1. untitled

1. untitled

That Time of the Month

Hermione woke up to the familiar and highly unwelcomed pains of menstrual cramps and a backache. She was a bit surprised, after all she kept very good track of this sort of thing. She reached for her calendar and realized that she was in fact early… “Great” she mumbled to herself, “this just throws my entire study schedule off, and right before the end of term too. This is bloody wonderful.” Hermione forced herself to get out of bed so that she could at least take some Muggle medication that would make her cramps disappear. There wasn't even one pill left in the bottle; since she was early she hadn't yet owled her mother to send her a new bottle. Hermione held the bottle upside down and shook it, “What is the bloody point of being a witch if you can't magically make Midol appear! Now I have to traipse across the castle all the way to the Hospital Wing and see if there is anything Madame Pomfrey can do! Yet another hitch in my study schedule!” Hermione got herself dressed and made her way into the common room. Ron was sitting in one of the big fluffy arm chairs in front of the fire trying to finish up his History of Magic essay before class, which was immediately after breakfast.

Ron was happy to see Hermione coming down the stairs and out of the Head Girl dormitory, he really could use some help, “Hey `Mione, could you please tell what the” he paused to read the question directly off the parchment, “long term effects of the Fourteenth Battle of the Goblin Rebellions was on the Wizarding world at large?” as he finished he grinned in order to soften her up a bit. Poor unsuspecting Ron…

“Ronald! How dare you sit here and wait for me to come out of my room to ask me to do your essay for you the morning that it is due, if you had any sense about you, you would have researched the essay weeks ago when you learned of the assignment. Just because I read all of the time does not mean I am a walking enchanted library you can borrow knowledge from just by grinning like an idiot!”

Ron was taken a back, “Geeze Hermione, we didn't get the assignment until last Monday..”

But before he could finish, Hermione cut him off, “We have had the syllabus since the first day of term, you should have done the research then…I have to go!” Hermione didn't even wait for Ron to say anything else, she just made her way to the Hospital Wing. Unfortunately for her when she got there the door was locked and there was a piece of parchment affixed to the door it read, `I have gone to a seminar for the day, if you are in need of any minor potions for minor ailments please see Professor Snape, all serious injures seek out Professor Dumbledore”

Hermione was not all too eager to go and find Professor Snape so that she could get relief from her menstrual cramps, “Well, before I face that bloke, I might as well try the library, after all one can learn almost anything from a book!” Hermione made her way to the library, that too was locked. She thanked Merlin that she was Head Girl and had the password to the door. “Bibliophile” she said to the door and then the lock clicked, “Finally, something does what I say it should do…” Hermione made her way to the Restricted Section where all of the medical spell books were. She searched through a book that seemed geared to dealing with women's issues. The only spell she could find was the one she already knew, the one that didn't work well enough to allow her to concentrate on her work! “This is wonderful! Now I have to go see Snape” she mumbled under her breath. Hermione almost decided not to make the trip down into the dungeons, but then a cramp hit her that almost sent her to the floor it was so painful. Hermione just clutched her stomach and swallowed her pride as she made her way to Professor Snape's office. She knocked on the door and waited for the silky voice to call “Enter”

“Hello Professor Snape”

“What is it that you need Ms. Granger?”

“Well, there was a note to see you at the Hospital Wing for mino..”

“What has Potter done now, and why isn't he down here himself if it is a minor injury?”

“Well, sir, it isn't Harry, I need…um…well..” Hermione was turning a bit red, and Snape was enjoying the fact that she was embarrassed, “ well you see, I was just wondering if you had any potion that would…work like Muggle medication to relieve…menstrual cramps professor” she mumbled the last part of the sentence so that it was barely audible.

Although Snape enjoyed seeing the little know it all embarrassed in front of him, he wasn't going to make her humiliate herself like this, partly because it made him so uncomfortable to deal with, “Well Ms. Granger, I am afraid there is nothing I can do for you since it is a natural occurrence, and well not much has been done to create a potion like that. Have you tried the spell?”

“Yes” Hermione said in a disappointed tone. She had embarrassed herself for no reason. Now Snape knew she was menstruating and would probably make her suffer the consequences in his class later on, “but it didn't work”

“Well, there is nothing I can do, you had better get to the Great Hall for breakfast” he said as he returned to marking his papers.

***

Hermione decided against going to the Great Hall for breakfast, she didn't want to have to see Ron and Harry just yet, instead she went to the kitchens to get some toast and pumpkin juice from the house-elves. After breakfast she went to her first class, History of Magic. Hermione went to her usual seat between Harry and Ron. Ron was kind of huffy and made a loud sigh when she sat down. Hermione had had enough, “You know Ron, you could have at least asked me how I was doing before you tried to get me to do your homework for you this morning!”

“ I was not asking you to do my homework, I was asking for some inspiration, besides Harry helped me” then without thinking Ron turned to the person sitting behind him, one Draco Malfoy, and said in a stage whisper, “Women and their bloody time of the month! They should be locked up or something so we don't have to deal with their hormones and mood swings!”

“I know exactly what you mean. Us men have to stick together, we should start a petition or something” Ron nodded in agreement as Draco spoke.

Harry just looked at Ron wide eyed, he wasn't about to get in the middle of this one; there wasn't enough money in the world. Hermione on the other hand was not going to keep her mouth shut, “Ron! You are agreeing with Malfoy, and what makes you think it is my time of the month? Can't I just be angry at you?”

“I was not agreeing with Malfoy, I was discussing a male condition with a fellow man” Ron said defending himself, “ and…No Hermione you cannot JUST be mad at me, I am far too…” Ron was at a loss for words

“Let me help you Ron” shouted Hermione, “thick headed to realize you are a clot” then she turned all her venom on Malfoy, after all she couldn't hex her best friend no matter how stupid he was, “Consecro Aiudrix” shouted Hermione as she pointed her wand at Malfoy.

Malfoy laughed, “Well, nothing happened, seems like your time of the month takes away your ability to be a smart ass!”

“We'll see about that!” smirked Hermione as she took out her parchment and quills and set to take notes as best as she could in her current situation. Professor Binns appeared from the blackboard and class began. Half way through class there was the sound of a girl shrieking, Harry turned around to see that it was none other than Draco Malfoy. Since Professor Binns didn't stop lecturing, Hermione just kept taking notes as Draco yelled, “Granger, what the bloody hell did you do to me, I'm…I'm…I don't know, but I have cramps and my back hurts and Merlin I am bleeding all over my robes!”

Hermione politely turned around and offered him a sanitary napkin, “I suggest you see Professor Snape, he'll have just the thing to fix up those nasty cramps for you” then Hermione returned to taking her notes. Harry just stared at her and made a mental note to not make her angry with him today! Harry heard Professor Binns say, “…and the pretty bird went bye-bye. That is the end of the lecture for today” and he knew class was done, although he wasn't sure what the professor was talking about, but he wasn't going to ask Hermione for her notes today.

Harry decided that something needed to be done about Hermione before the entirety of the male population of Hogwarts ended up like Draco…as bad as he was he still felt bad for the git. Harry saw Hermione coming out of the girls lavatory and called after her, “Hermione, can I talk to you for a second?”

Hermione was going to say no, but then she saw those beautiful green eyes she loved so much, and realized that she would do anything he asked her to right now and somehow looking at those eyes made her forget that she felt like her insides were being pulled out of her eye sockets…”Sure Harry”

“Are you feeling alright? I mean you've been acting odd”

“I'm fine, honestly, I don't know what you are talking about Harry” she lied

“I am not as thick as Ron” he paused and smirked, “Let's go to the Head Boy and Girl common room and skip classes, I think I have just the thing to make you feel better”

All of a sudden Hermione burst into tears, “Oh, Harry…no one has ever done anything so…” but before she could finish that sentence, she was hit with a wave of cramps that made her weak in the knees. They were very painful. She fell forward into Harry who instinctively wrapped his arms around her, “I can't take this anymore Harry, I'm going to die if I don't figure out a way to make them stop” Harry could see that Hermione's face had turned white as a sheet.

“C'mon love, let's get you to the hospital wing…”

“No one's there”

“Fine then. I'll carry you to the common room and take care of you myself!”

“Harry what do you know about menstrual cramps?”

“I'm one of the most powerful wizards in the world, I'll figure it out”

Hermione giggled a bit as Harry picked her up to hold her like he was cradling an infant, “Sorry love, you wouldn't know what a cramp was if it was naked dancing the can-can on your head while wearing a feathered boa hat”

“Well if it was dressed like that, I don't think it could cause me too much damage” he retorted, but Hermione didn't laugh. She just clutched her abdomen and bit her bottom lip so she wouldn't scream.

***

Harry managed to get Hermione into the common room they shared as Head Boy and Head Girl. They were alone and would not be disturbed, so he could focus all of his attention on her. “Love,are you taking anything for this, you know you don't have to be brave?” he asked as he noticed a tear forming in her eye. *This has to be bad, she never complains about anything like this* Harry thought.

“The only thing that works are Muggle pills and they won't be here until tomorrow. I wasn't due to start for another week so I didn't owl my Mum.” Then she glanced at Harry, who looked very worried so she added, “Don't worry, its been this bad since I had my first cycle…its just I've never run out of pills before”

“Poor darling, here let me see if I can help. What hurts the most?”

“Well, right now my back”

“I think I read somewhere” he said searching his mind, “ah yes. I think a heating charm might work on your back.” He reached over and took her robes off before she could argue and got her to lie face down on the floor in front of the fire, he lifted her shirt and cast the charm on her back. All Hermione could do was offer a sigh of relief, then after a small period of silence, “That was bloody brilliant Harry!” then she added, “Why didn't I think of that…and when ever did you read something like that?”

“You aren't the only one who knows where the library is” he teased, “Now let's do something about your stomach” Harry cast the heating charm on his hands and then coaxed Hermione to turn around. He gently lifted her shirt and lowered her skirt just enough to expose the part of her abdomen that was causing her so much trouble. He massaged lightly so that the heat could work. Eventually Hermione fell asleep. Harry just watched her sleep and when ever he thought she would stir he would repeat the massaged. The two of them spent the night in their private common room, Harry barely slept and when he finally did fall asleep he was awakened by Hedwig tapping on the window.

Harry instinctually got up and went to the window, he noticed a rather large bottle wrapped in brown paper dangling from Hedwig's talons by a single brown string. “Thank Merlin you brought this Hedwig, I don't think Hermione would have made it through another day that disrupted her study schedule!” Harry removed the package from his owl and walked over to Hermione. She was already awake. “Here you are Hermione”

Hermione looked at the bottle of Midol as though it were the sorcerer's stone. “Thank Merlin! I though today would never arrive. Harry thanks for being so helpful yesterday.” She paused, the word yesterday, “Oh Merlin, I was so awful to Ron…I had better find him and apologize”

“Later” whispered Harry, “Now that I have my girlfriend back in top form I want to kiss her properly, then you can go apologize or hex anyone you want!”

Fin

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