Never in a Million Days

Olivia Weasley

Rating: PG
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 5
Published: 08/11/2004
Last Updated: 13/04/2005
Status: In Progress

Brenna has always thought Sirius Black was the epitome of the word "handsome." What happens when she finds out he thinks the world of her? Sirius/OC

1. Part One


A/N: I know I've been really bad about updating my other fanfictions, but I had to post this one. Now I have an L/J, H/Hr, and a R/L. Now all I have to do is a D/G ~_^. I think this ficcle turned out alright. There are three parts, and please read and review! ^_^

Never in a Million Days

Part One

Finally it was weekend, and Brenna didn't feel like doing any homework…even though she had to. Something was telling her “Go outside! It's nice and sunny and Sirius is out there!” Why was her mind telling her about Sirius? Maybe because she thought he was the most handsome boy she'd ever seen in her whole life…along with every other girl in the whole bloody school. He was a Marauder, along with Remus Lupin, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew.

The Marauders had a reputation at school…a reputation for being trouble-makers and girl-magnets; all of them. Two were already taken, them being Remus and James. James was going with Lily Evans, one of Brenna's best friends. Remus was going with a pretty brunette who was in Ravenclaw, Brenna forgot her name. Sirius never really noticed the girls gaping at him like he was some museum artifact. Sometimes they even fought over him when he wasn't looking. Girls could be gruesome when it came to guys, especially Sirius. That was one reason Brenna stayed away from his as much as humanly possible, he was almost always with a girl, and she didn't want to be made out as some girl who was fawning over him. Peter was the only Marauder who didn't really have a dating life. He had had one girlfriend in his whole time at Hogwarts, and she was a year younger than him.

Brenna sighed as she looked back to her Transfiguration homework. She was nearly finished, maybe she'd have some time to go outside and take a stroll. It was an essay about Human Transfiguration, which she wasn't good at all. She could transfigure anything else, but humans…that was not her thing. Suddenly, she heard someone pull up a chair beside her. Turning in her chair, she saw a girl with waist-length auburn hair and emerald green eyes staring back at her.

“Hey Lils,” said Brenna. Lily Evans smiled and looked over at Brenna's transfiguration homework.

“McGonagall really put us through it the other day didn't she?” she said, shaking her head. She took this class with Brenna, but she had already finished the assignment. Lily never saved things for the last minute; she always got them done beforehand.

“Well can you help me?” Brenna asked, as though Lily were supposed to ask her that ages ago.

“No, I think you're almost there,” she said airily. Brenna glared at her and put her head down onto her homework, moaning all the while. She could hear Lily's voice as she talked to James, Sirius's best friend. They were going steady now, and their relationship was very close. Almost too close in fact, which meant that they acted like they were married, when they weren't…yet. She lifted her head up from the piece of parchment and pushed her black hair behind her ears. She was almost done with the stupid essay; she just decided to get it over with once and for all.

Once she was finished with the dreaded assignment, she began packing everything into her bag. She looked around at everyone in the Common Room. Most of the people were couples, either hand in hand or sitting with each other chatting. Brenna wished more than anything that she could do that; sit with a guy and talk with him for eternity. Sirius had never spoken to her, but they had seen each other on several occasions. They never had the courage to talk; they always kept the silence, no matter what. Looking back at her unpacked book bag, Brenna started stuffing it with books again.

.+.

Sirius walked with Remus as they made their way back to the castle. It was almost lunch time, and he was hungry as a dog (no pun intended). He had been spending the whole day outside, forgetting about the pile of homework he had waiting upstairs for him. He jumped when he heard a girl shriek with giggles behind him. Turning around, he saw Marissa Chao chatting with a pair of girls, both of whom were looking straight at him and he knew they were all talking about him. It annoyed the bleeding hell out of him when girls did that, but they always did it…in the corridors, during classes, it was like he was a moving artifact in a museum. But he always looked at the bright side of things: They liked him. Marissa was a pretty girl, but he didn't like her at all. She could be like a poison, a deadly poison. Whenever she liked a boy, she asked him out; always asked him out. He had asked out Sirius at one point, but he denied the invitation. That made her mad at him and he doubted whether they would ever get over it.

“Looks like she still likes you Padfoot,” mumbled Remus, as they had walked inside the castle and the girls were out of earshot.

“Of course she does, who wouldn't?” he asked sarcastically.

“A smart girl,” said Remus. Sirius pushed Remus's shoulder playfully and headed towards the Gryffindor Common Room to unglue Lily and James if they were attached. They were almost always snogging somewhere, so Sirius and Remus always had to go to the rescue whenever they found them, or else it got out of hand sometimes. That wasn't good, if they were in public.

“Do you think Prongs and Lily are detached yet?” asked Remus, as he climbed the stairs to Gryffindor Tower.

“No, no one else would be brave enough to get near them. I think they're still attached,” said Sirius as he walked through the Portrait Hole into the Common Room. Sure enough, Sirius found James and Lily on the couch.

“That's it lovebirds break it up, break it up,” said Remus, as James pulled away quickly and looked inquiringly at his best friend.

“And what do you want?” he asked irritably.

“Well, we want you to eat dinner, so we won't have to hear your stomach growling all night long,” said Remus. Sirius smirked and James rolled his eyes.

“Fine, it's just that we love each other, as you should already know,” said Lily, who was still smiling.

“Well you're about to eat, so you better save some saliva before your mouth goes dry,” said Sirius. James rolled his eyes again and got up reluctantly off the couch, Lily following suite. But before they could all head out of the Common Room, Sirius saw something that made his own mouth go dry. A girl with straight, uniquely thick, shiny black hair and a clear porcelain complexion was sitting at a table packing her schoolbag. She was the most beautiful girl Sirius had ever set his eyes on, and he was oblivious to the fact he was staring at her with his mouth open like an idiot. She had deep blue eyes that looked like they ought to be part of an ocean and her long black eyelashes magnified them ten times more. Sirius didn't know what to do…he was lost for words at the moment. He had seen this girl before, and on all those occasions he found himself like this. No one had ever noticed it, including his best friends, but that was about to change.

“Padfoot, are you with us?” asked James, waving a hand in front of him while blurring his vision of the girl. He just came back to life when he realized Remus and Lily were also looking at him with confused expressions.

“Oh…sorry. I was…sort of…out of it for a moment,” said Sirius, still staring at the mysterious girl sitting at the table. Lily, James, and Remus all exchanged looks.

“We'll be waiting for you downstairs,” said Lily, as she walked out of the Common Room with Remus. James however, was still standing by his best friend, making sure that he wasn't blind.

“Listen, if she makes you act like this, then just go up to her and speak to her,” said James, reading Sirius's mind.

“James, are you off your knocker?! Look at her, she's…an angel,” said Sirius, looking back over at the girl who had not yet noticed he had been gaping at her.

“She might be extremely beautiful but she's not an angel, she's certainly human,” said James. “You should go and talk to her, see what she's like. I mean, don't start going bonkers over her and then find out she has an attitude like a banshee. I really doubt that though, Lily told me about her one time. Her name is Brenna, and she's supposed to be really nice. I'll leave you here while you make up your mind all right?” At that, James walked out of the Common Room and headed towards the Great Hall. Whatever James might say, he couldn't talk to her…he just couldn't…but he had to. He had to talk to her so that he could see what she was like, just see who she was. He had seen her on several previous occasions during food times in the Great Hall and during classes, but had never even thought of talking to her. He certainly thought that she had a boyfriend, being as attractive as she was. But he had never seen so much as a first year boy hanging around her. She was almost always alone, or with a small group of friends. After the entire wait, he mustered all the courage he had and started walking towards Brenna. Sirius could barely feel the carpet under him and his head was about as blank as it had been when he found out Remus was a werewolf. Come on Padfoot you can do this! You went up to that pretty stray in Hogsmeade when you were a dog didn't you? Hopefully he wouldn't trip on something or get clumsy before he reached her… She dropped one of her quills gracefully (or clumsily, he couldn't make up his mind) and Sirius seized the opportunity.

“Hi,” he said breathlessly, making the girl look up at him with her gorgeous face and eyes and handing her the quill.

“Thanks. Er…hello. My name's Brenna,” she said, packing the last book into her bag and standing up to her full height, being at least 5'9.

“I'm Sirius, nice to meet you,” he said in a surprisingly smooth fashion. The girl named Brenna smiled nervously and Sirius returned the smile. This was the most awkward moment he had ever had with someone, and he didn't like it. What's wrong with you Sirius? You're usually never like this around a girl, why should this one be any different? But he had an idea why it was so different. She was more beautiful than any other girl, and had a presence that filled the room.

“W-well it's time for lunch, we better head down to the Great Hall,” she said, sounding a bit nervous. Glad that he wasn't the only one acting nervous, he nodded his head and they set out of the Common Room, Sirius still glancing at her occasionally.

.+.

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2. Part Two


Part Two

“Ready to go?” asked Lily. Brenna nodded her head as they set out of the Great Hall after breakfast. Her first class was Charms, which she was glad of. It was by far one of her best subjects. She and Lily almost always sat in the back, unless Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter had already taken the seats. After they passed Nearly Headless Nick and gave him a `Hello,' Brenna and Lily walked into the Charms classroom. James and Co. weren't there yet, so they seized two seats in the back. Not even a minute after they sat down, they found James and Sirius staring at them inquiringly.

“And what are you two doing in our seats?” asked James. Lily snickered and said, “You mean to say, that these are your seats? Do you see `James Potter' or `Sirius Black' written on them? I sure don't…unless I'm going blind.” Brenna giggled and the smile on James's face vanished. Sirius smirked and glanced at Brenna. She smiled back at him and their eyes locked. She never noticed that he had grey eyes, and striking ones at that. She wouldn't blink, not if he didn't. After concentrating she could see something in his eyes. She wasn't sure what it was, but before she could tell, James pulled them out of their reverie.

“…so you see what the solution is, don't you Sirius?” asked James, throwing Sirius a fleeting look as if he were supposed to know the answer. Having no idea what the response was supposed to be, Sirius said, “Oh, yeah, right.” James sat down next to Lily and Sirius couldn't choose where to sit. There was a perfectly vacant seat next to Brenna where he could sit next to her, and there was a seat next to James where he could sit. After contemplating for a moment, Sirius took a seat next to the girl he adored.

Brenna looked at the person sitting next to her. He beamed and she felt butterflies creeping into the pit of her stomach. He was sitting next to her…Sirius Black, the boy who she'd liked since her third year at Hogwarts, was sitting next to her…when there was a totally unoccupied seat next to his best friend! She quickly shooed the butterflies away and sighed quietly as she smiled back at the handsome boy. He was so handsome, with his perfect hair and makes-you-melt smile. She had talked to him the other day for hours, and had thoroughly enjoyed it. He had a great personality, which made him etch himself even more into her heart. Before class was over, he touched her hand under the table which caused them both to blush.

.+.

After dinner that night, Sirius headed towards the Gryffindor Common Room. He was exhausted after running from Snape, who he had just tried to hex. He said the password (Ignitus) and walked through the Portrait Hole. He didn't see any of his friends in the Common Room, or Brenna, so he went straight up to the boys' dorm. James was up there, but he didn't find Remus or Peter.

“What are you doing up here so early in the evening?” asked James. Sirius shrugged and sat down on his bed. “It was too noisy in the Common Room. I wanted some peace and quiet.”

“Oh… Why?” asked James.

“I'm tired.” mumbled Sirius.

“Alright. So what is it that's bothering you?” asked James as if he knew what was troubling Sirius.

“None of your business,” he snarled.

“Well excuse me,” said James arrogantly. There was a silence. “What about Brenna?” James smirked while Sirius stopped in midair from taking off his shoe.

“What about her?”

“You want to be with her!”

“Come again?”

“Stop hiding it, I know you do.”

“Why do you think so?”

“Because whenever you see her, you stop whatever your doing and don't notice anything else going on around you,” he said, counting on a finger. “You always have a dazed look on your face whenever she's talking to you. Whenever you talk about her to me, it ends up in a conversation about what you'd do to her if you had the chance!”

“So what?” said Sirius, feeling the heat rising in his face.

“At least I can see what's in front of my face.”

“I can see what's in front of my face. It's just that I think love is a strong word to use. It's just that I find her…I find her irresistible,” said Sirius, putting on his pajamas. James made a gesture in the air with his hand like he caught something.

“You love her.”

“I think she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen…” said Sirius, avoiding James' penetrating gaze. “Maybe I do love her, I don't know. I have to spend more time with her to find out don't I?” Sirius ran a hand through his thick hair. James sat back down on his bed and nodded his head.

“Listen, I knew that I loved Lily the first moment I set eyes on her. I went about it in the wrong way of course, by hexing people to get her attention. But you're not like that. You talk to a girl to get her attention, unlike I ever did. I know she likes you and you like her. So why don't you do more than talk to her?”

“What d'you mean?” asked Sirius slowly, looking at James.

“You'll see,” said James ominously. Sirius sat there for a moment, thinking about what James had just said. What did James mean, `do more than talk to her'? He closed his eyes and thought more and more about his friend's advice.

.+.

“So how about Sirius Black, do you like him?” asked Lily, who was sitting on Brenna's bed while they talked/gossiped. Brenna was taken aback by this question. It was very random, and totally irrelevant to what they'd been talking about before.

“Why would you think that?” asked Brenna, who was fidgeting with her pillowcase.

“You were crimson when he sat down next to you in Charms today.”

“So what's your point?”

“Oh come on Brenna! You fancy him!” There was a pause in which Brenna finally looked up at her friend.

“I know I do, isn't it horrible?”

“Why would it be horrible?”

“Because wouldn't it mean that I'd be one of those girls who fawns over Sirius?”

“No, there's a difference between girls who fawn over him and girls who actually like him for who he is.”

“Yes, there is a difference…but who would tell the difference?”

“He would, and that's all that matters. He'd know that you were more than a girl who just liked him for his hair and smile.”

“You're right…that is all that matters.” Brenna watched Lily get off her bed and go to her own. After she was sure Lily didn't need the candle to see anymore, she blew it out. Brenna began to think back to the look she had seen in his eyes earlier that day. Had it been sadness? What did Sirius have to be sad about? Maybe there was something he was hiding, something that was bothering him. But what was it? She shook her head. It was really none of her business, she needed to stop prying. All she knew was that Sirius was smart; he could tell when a person liked him for who he was, not for his good-looks and his alluring eyes. He had those attributes of course, but that was on the side. His personality came before anything else.

.+.


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3. Part Three


A/N/: Thanks for the reviews you guys! Here's the last part. I know I still have a lot of growing to do, but I'm knew at this romance thing. Give me a break =P

Since I forgot the Disclaimer: All belongs to JK Rowling, with the exception of Brenna, who is all my own. Stupid me! >_<

Part Three

Brenna walked out of the Common Room that night to relax. She had had a hard day at school, and she had just finished tons of homework. Usually when her mind was boggled or she was angry about something, she went outside onto the grounds to loosen up. Her favorite spot was a bench right in front of the Hogwarts Lake. She sat there on Saturdays too, when she had to do homework or if she was hanging out with friends. The serenity of the lake made her feel calm; made her feel like there were no other cares in the world. She knew that could never happen, but it was nice to dream. Brenna closed her eyes and felt a breeze sweep through her hair that she had let down. As soon as she opened her eyes she saw a glimpse of a full moon.

.+.

“Hurry up Prongs!” whispered Remus, who was creeping out of the Whomping Willow along with Sirius and Peter. James climbed through just as Remus took his foot off the tree stump that kept the raging tree idle. Sirius took a deep breath and looked up into the sky. It was beautiful that night, there seemed to be an intensity about the sky that hadn't been there before. He wanted to take a walk on the grounds, after James and Remus had gone inside. Walking around the grounds near the lake would make him think about the world around him, yet it ridded his mind of all the bad things. He didn't think anyone would see him, let alone catch him. He finally snapped back to reality when James, Peter, and Remus set off at a run towards the grounds.

“Hey,” called Sirius, getting James' attention. He turned around and headed towards Sirius.

“What's up?” he asked.

“I think I'm going for a walk; just to clear my mind,” said Sirius. James nodded his head, said `okay' and headed towards the castle at a run. Sirius set off at a walk up the hill towards the lake, gazing into the starry night as he walked with his hands in his pockets.

.+.

Brenna stood up off the bench. She wasn't ready to go back to the castle just yet, but she just wanted to stretch her legs after sitting on the bench for so long. She watched the Giant Squid make the water ripple and saw a mermaid tail come up out of the water. That was a rare site, since the mermaids usually were down at the bottom of the lake instead of the top.

“I wish the whole world was this peaceful,” she whispered to herself as she gazed around to the Forbidden Forest. She saw a threstral spread its leathery wings and land in a tree. She sighed as a solitary tear rolled down her cheek. She wasn't usually that emotional, but sometimes her memories got the better of her. She hastily wiped it away from her cheek and looked down at the grass under her bare feet while a few sobs escaped her throat.

“Are you alright?” said a voice from behind her. “Oh!” she gasped as she looked up at the person standing beside her. “What are you doing here?”

“Wandering the grounds,” said Sirius. What was Brenna doing here in the middle of the night, crying? “What's wrong?” he asked, seeing her sodden face.

“Oh, it's nothing. I'm just thinking about how life can never go unharmed,” she said slowly. Sirius understood quite well what she meant, and nodded his head as he looked into her stunning blue eyes. They were welled up with tears, but she looked just as beautiful as she had before. He really wanted to help her with whatever was troubling her.

“Are you sure it's nothing? You seem pretty upset…” said Sirius softly. Brenna thought for a moment then let her head down into her hands slowly, letting more tears fall. He rested his hand gently on her back and moved closer to her. Before long, she was leaning against his chest and cradled in his arms. “It's alright,” he said delicately. After holding onto each other ceaselessly, Sirius felt Brenna's head lift off his chest. Her tears hadn't stopped flowing yet and her cheeks were a little pink. He raised his hand to her smooth face to wipe away her tears. She shivered at his soft touch, but was warm once again at his hand resting behind her neck. Sirius lowered his lips to hers and they were now immersed in a passionate kiss. He tangled his fingers in her hair and tasted her. Instantly he wanted more, but somehow he could tell she wasn't inwardly ready. She rested her hand on his lower back and he felt his muscles loosen up. She ended this amazing thing and at once wished it wasn't over. He returned her feelings and they looked into one another's eyes. He could see the happiness she once had glowing in her blushed grin. Sirius rubbed her back as he pulled her close. She took a steady breath and inhaled his wonderful scent, which made her quiver with delight.

“Sirius,” she said quietly, taking his shoulders and bringing her face to meet his gaze.

“Will you—” he asked before being interrupted by another kiss. Apparently she knew what he was going to ask her.

“I think I'll take that as a yes,” he said. She nodded as he placed an arm around her and they set off back towards the castle, in a warm embrace that would never let go.

.+.

Sirius looked away from the Pensieve. He couldn't take it anymore…he couldn't bare it. He existed without her…without her touch…without her voice. He broke into a silent bout of tears, sitting on the cold hard ground inside his home. He had lost James…he had lost Lily…he might loose Harry…at least he still had --

“Sirius, are you alright?” came a voice from the door. Remus was standing there with a strange expression on his face. He walked over to his best friend and looked into the Pensieve. He could see the face of a beautiful woman smiling up at him.

“Brenna,” he gasped hoarsely. Sirius didn't acknowledge him as he looked at the floor.

“You know that these memories will cause you more grief Sirius,” said Remus firmly but quietly. “So why do you watch them?”

“Because I miss her face... Her voice... Her presence isn't here anymore...”

“She's gone Sirius. She's gone and she can't come back. You have to let her go…”

“I can't!” Sirius exclaimed, standing up from the ground. “I can't let her go! She was what I lived for Remus, I can't live thinking that she's dead!” Sirius was sobbing desperately as he leaned against the wall and slid down onto the ground once again. Remus felt tears welling up in his own eyes as he saw his friend grieve like this for someone that he loved with everything he had.

“I know that it will take time for you to come to realize it, but you have to see the reality of this world. You have you tell yourself that she's in a place that you'll be someday. You'll see her again.” Sirius put his face in his hands and let Remus try to calm him down the best he knew how.

.+.

Sirius felt the Cruciatus curse stop taking effect as soon as he fell behind the black, raggedy veil. He landed with a hard thud on what he assumed was a floor, and took a moment to open his eyes. He was astonished to see something he thought he'd never see again in his life. An unbelievably gorgeous woman in a long black dress was standing in front of him with

“Brenna,” he breathed. She was standing there, fully formed, and entirely whole from what he could see. She looked his age now, but was still beautiful beyond belief. When the man got up from the ground, he got a better view of her. The black dress was billowing and her hair was straight as ever but down to her waist. She glided over to him and placed a hand on his cheek. It felt like skin, in fact…it was skin. She wasn't a ghost.

“I thought I'd never see you in a million days…” he said as he took her hand in his own. She shook her head as she smiled.

“No Sirius... I'm here,” she reassured him. He smiled once more and kissed her with all the passion he had welled up inside him. She smiled against his lips, and they drifted away, to a much happier place. He would miss his friends, but he found what he had been missing for all of those long years.

.+.

{ The End }

Review. Critique. Thank you =]


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