Crestfallen by J Rating: NC17 Genres: Angst, Romance Relationships: Draco & Ginny Book: Draco & Ginny, Books 1 - 5 Published: 23/11/2004 Last Updated: 23/11/2004 Status: Completed As you were, you'll be again. To mold like clay, to break like dirt. Hard R to mild NC-17. Oneshot. 1. Crestfallen -------------- **CRESTFALLEN** **BY: J** **DISCLAIMER –** *This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.* *The lyrics (in bold) to* Smashing Pumpkins *Crestfallen do not belong to me.* **FICLET SUMMARY –** As you were, you'll be again. To mold like clay, to break like dirt. Hard R to mild NC-17. Oneshot. **AUTHOR NOTES –** It needs some work but it’s what came out after listening to Smashing Pumpkins – Crestfallen over and over. Kind of fluffy, toothbrushes at hand? Ginny’s mouth curved into a smile as she stretched, listening to the muttered curses beside her. She opened her eyes and stared up at the black canopy, the smile slightly dimmed. Draco groaned and rolled over to meet her gaze, his grey eyes roving over her face. His eyes shuttered and he let out a groan as he fell back against his pillow. “For the love of Salazar,” he murmured, kicking off the sheets. Ginny shivered as the cold air of the dungeons hit her skin and she slipped her hands around the slim naked waist beside her, pulling him closer. He moved to get up but sighed and rested his head against the pillow, his nose tucked beneath her ear. His thigh found its way between her own as the planes of his stomach moved smoothly against her hip. “I think it was after the whiskey,” she said. Draco gave a suffering sigh making her shudder as the damp hot air met her skin. His hand ran up the curve of her hip. “I swear, we should just get married with all the shagging we’ve been doing. I go get smashed at a party to meet someone new, and *you* end up in my bed.” She laughed and let her hands wander down his back to his arse, moving languidly over it to the crease where it met his thigh. Sex with them had gotten so comfortable that the feeling of his skin against hers was something she had become used to quite quickly. This inability to keep from touching him, running over the dips and planes of his body to move against crisp hair that usually only covered a masculine body. She closed her eyes and turned her head so his nose touched hers. She shivered again as cold air brushed against her skin, sending goose bumps across her stomach and breasts. “Are you upset?” His thumb ran over the softness of her nipple. “Because dealing with your rage when I have a hangover worse than Snape’s temper isn’t something I’m looking forward to.” “Who approached who?” Flashes of the club came back in snatches, the heat of bodies sliding against each other in tandem with the music. She had gotten terribly upset about the first time he’d ended up in her bed, his grey eyes opening in shock before disappearing with a quick apparition spell. Cold and bereft, she’d been left with a pile of clothes that smelt too much of him and too much of regret. It wasn’t that they didn’t know each other but Britain was considerably large and running into old students of Hogwarts was unlikely. With her work in the ministry unsuccessful and his newfound state of poverty after the war, he was the last person she expected to bump into. The memories of Harry and Ron rubbing in the loss of his wealth and father still fresh in her mind. He’d still been young despite being seventeen, red splotches colouring his cheeks as his eyes flashed in embarrassment and anger. Irony when his old barbs and retorts no longer worked in face of his lack of wealth. “It’s definitely your fault, I kept far away from you and last thing I remember is an incredibly sexy brunette with the best pair of tits—” “Hermione.” “Fuck.” She laughed again and the corners of Draco’s eyes crinkled slightly back at her as he smirked. She followed the arch of his right eyebrow, amused at the darkness of it against his skin and white hair. Following the length of a pointed nose, it she wondered at how much *feeling* she could have for one person. His mouth was slightly parted and his breaths brushed against her lips warmly. “You look like you’re doing way too much thinking considering the position we’re in.” She gave him an amused look, it wasn’t so much thinking than *looking*. Draco Malfoy wasn’t the best looking of them all, too pointy and too many sharp angles but her mind couldn’t help wandering over images of that face and body during long hours at work. She smiled, maybe it was his body then. Slim waist and broad shoulders, he was the perfect image of lanky and lanky being something she loved in a bloke. She rolled onto her back pulling him on top of her, entwining his fingers with hers as she pulled her hands above her head. He shut his eyes, “Merlin Gin, I don’t want to be with you.” Ginny tensed, her hands loosening his as she fought off a flush at being so romantic with him. Lying in the comfort of his body and thinking long thoughts about him, it was crushing to find out he was thinking of the fastest way to get out of their position. Perhaps she did seek him out last night, desperate to feel him again and his mouth on hers. He always kissed so overpoweringly that she was out of breath and gasping for air as his tongue streaked wetly against her neck. Then she remembered, hips grinding and hands scorching her hips and thighs as a man’s cock pressed tightly against her arse. She’d been so aroused by it, aroused by him and then Draco had stepped in. Not for a dance, not to resume the other man’s position but to pull her off the dance floor, obviously not pleased. She hadn’t cared who it was, as long as someone could ease that ache that she’d had whenever she thought of him. But *he’d* approached her, *he’d* pulled her away from moving on and getting over him. Ginny blinked, he’d apparated them away. “Malfoy—” He growled in disgust, “Malfoy? That’s it then?” She tightened her hands on his and stared up into his face. His eyes were cold and hard and his mouth tightened as he clenched his teeth. He looked away from her and Ginny felt a flash of anger. He’d been doing that for a long while now, avoiding her gaze as they spoke; always looking at something else, something other than her. She released her hold on him and pushed him away. “Fine Draco, just get the fuck on with your life and leave mine alone.” He didn’t move which infuriated her more. “I know what this is about, you can’t be with me because obviously it means to society that you must have sunk low enough *to* be with me. A Malfoy in poverty must be with a Weasley, it’s written in stone.” He made a sound of disgust and dipped his head, kissing her soundly on the mouth. He began murmuring against her lips, catching her sighs as his hands moved to arouse her. “Alright Gin, let’s go from the beginning. It begins in perfect consequence, the trip of fate and your despicable lapse of judgment. It always does, this it, this oh so profound event that turns one’s life around that it can no longer be just a story you tell but this monumental turn of events. She moaned as a hand ran through slick curls, teasing and probing. “It’s fucking awful and it’s been hell. **Who am I to need you when I’m down?** You’ve obviously moved on, happy with that sod. It’s infuriating; but then you’ve always been infuriating. The infectious grin, that awful scandalous laugh that I still can’t help feeling satisfied over when I cause it. **Where are you when I need you around**? I used to hate your sympathetic glances, those understanding smiles; now they’re all I think about. I know you realize though,” he nipped at her collarbone, “when you catch me glancing, that **your life is not your own**.” “I found it ridiculous that I was mooning over the poorest witch of Britain. I found intolerable that you left pieces of you all over my room. I’d love to say I’ve burned your favourite green knickers but then I’d be burning a memory. I know you want me to. They’re probably not even your favourite anymore, just a piece of a past left behind. You’ve turned me barking mad. For fuck’s sake Gin, **all I ask you is for another chance**. I want **another way around you**.” He smirked against her lips, “I know you liked it; the quick shags, you liked it dirty and quick. You liked it when I was buried hard and deep inside of you. You loved when we stopped in that moment, listening to me pant into your ear as your sighs and moans filled mine. I’d always **lived by circumstance**.” “It’s hard to **need you now**. **For you to ask** about us and then me **to tell you no** because all the bloody time I don’t believe I **deserve your love and sympathy**. Then you started dating and it felt like **you were never meant to belong to me**. I’d always thought **you may go**, but we’ve had **too many years built into memories**. To be honest, **your life is not your own**, it’s a part of mine now. I don’t know if you want that, but I definitely do.” He slipped inside her roughly, her breaths coming in gasps as he pushed into her at a maddening pace. She scratched at his back as his mouth and teeth worked at her breasts. When she came he’d been too far gone, following her quickly with a groan and falling against her chest. Her fingers found their way through his hair as they tried to catch their breaths. “I definitely do,” he murmured against her skin. -- **Completed 11/23/04**