Hermione Granger's Pain

Draco and Ginny 1092

Rating: PG13
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 4
Published: 07/12/2004
Last Updated: 19/01/2005
Status: in_progress

Hermione has been suicidal for two years. Her father turns abusive towards her and the rest of her family. Will Harry save her for suicide, or will he be too late to save her? And Sirius is not dead. Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny & Ron/Luna

Chapters

1. Is it my fault?

2. They Don't know Me

3. Horrors of the past returning?

4. Harry's secret found out

5. Un-break My heart

6. I Love You

1. Is it my fault?

Disclaimer: I don't (though I wish!) own Harry Potter and characters! JK Rowling does! The songs that might enter this fic don't belong to me! They would belong to the song artist! I only own the plot and the names of Hermione's parents and the other characters that you don't see in the books!

Ships in the fic: Harry/Hermione, possibly Draco/Ginny and Ron/Luna

Hermione Granger's pain

Chapter 1: Is It My Fault?

One cold day in August, Hermione Granger was sitting on her bed in her room, crying.

Her parents had been arguing over her safety and whether or not she should go back to Hogwarts for the following year. She had begun to wonder if it was her fault. Every night, when her father came home from being out with his friends, he would come up to her room and start beating her, abusing her. She was thrown at her window, causing it to break and her almost fall through.

Since then, she had become suicidal. Her mother caught her the one time, trying to cut her neck with a knife.

"Why can't people just accept the fact I want to die?!" Hermione said to herself through sobs.

Her mother, Ria, who had been outside her room when she had said it, went in to soothe her daughter, her sisters Leah and Nicola following.

Leah and Nicola went straight to their older sister and curled up beside her.

"Every time I try to fly I fall. Without my wings I feel so small. I guess I need you baby. And every time I see you in my dreams I see your face. It's haunting me. I guess I need you baby." Ria sang softly to the three crying girls.

Hermione, having heard Ria, slowly stopped crying and held her two younger sisters.

'Maybe it's all my fault these arguments started and my dad turning abusive towards me' Hermione thought as she fell into an uneasy sleep with her two of her sisters with her. If her father wanted to hurt them, he'd have to get through her first!

The next morning, Hermione woke up to find that Leah and Nicola were missing.

'Oh God! My mum isn't here, Leah, Nicola and Britney are nowhere to be found andlittleJason and I arestuck here with that raving lunatic and his obnoxious friends!' Hermione thought as she looked in the room her three sisters shared, her baby brother’s room and her parents’room.

2. They Don't know Me

Disclaimer: I don't (though I wish!) own Harry Potter and characters! JK Rowling does! The songs that might enter this fic don't belong to me! They would belong to the song artist! I only own the plot and the names of Hermione's parents and the other characters that you don't see in the books!

Ships in the fic: Harry/Hermione, possibly Draco/Ginny and Ron/Luna

The story will be in the authors POV and Hermione's POV.

Hermione Granger's pain

Chapter 2: They Don't Know Me!!

"HERMIONE!" Roared a voice from downstairs I dreaded to hear. Trying not to show any fear, I yelled back, "Yeah, dad?"

"GET DOWN HERE! AND BRING JASON WITH YOU!" her father, Ashley, shouted again.

Shaking, I went into my crying baby brother's room, picked him up out of his crib and soothed him whilst walking shakily downstairs to my father. When I reached the bottom of the stairs I stopped shaking, remembering what my father would do to me if I showed any fear in the smallest way possible. I concentrated on playing with Jason as I walked into the kitchen to see what my father and his stupid friends wanted.

When I was in the kitchen, I saw my mother, Leah, Nicola and Britney in the back garden, playing. I drew a sigh of relief, knowing Jason and I weren't alone with this imbecile.

"Why were you trying to kill yourself?!?!" my father screamed at me, making Jason cry again. My first intention was to run, with Jason of course, out the house like hell. But I knew the abuser I used to call 'daddy' would catch up with us and most likely kill us.

I knew what I had to do. I had to ask my mum if she could take me to King's Cross Station. Then, if she says that she will, I'll sneak Jason out with me, with all of his things in my trunk with mine, and I'll take him to Hogwarts with me. Of course, I'll have to tell her. I don't want her to worry and think that Jason's dead when he won't be, do I!

"Well?!" my dad asked again.

'Because of you!' was what I wanted to say, but I knew I'd probably get slapped or something, possibly even more than just the abusive things he does to me anyway. Instead, I just said, "I can't remember me doing that, dad."

Suddenly, as I'd stopped talking, a shuddering blast came from the living-room. Thinking it must have been Harry and Ron coming to take me back to the Burrow or possibly Grimmauld Place, where Sirius lived, I ran in the room and I was greeted by what I'd wished and hoped for that moment.

There stood, covered in soot, dirt and dust, were Harry and Ron.

I ran and hugged Ron tight, though being careful as not to squash my brother. I then released him and hugged Harry as I did with Ron.

"Hey 'Mione." Harry said and kissed me on the cheek.

My heart fluttered at the nickname he'd given me, just then.

"Hey Harry." I said back. "Harry, could you look after my little brother for a bit? I need to do a few things" I asked.

"Yeah, sure." Harry replied and took Jason from my arm and I bounced outside to tell my mum.

"Mum, Harry and Ron are here. I'm going to take Jason with me as well." I told her.

"Ok dear, all his things are in his room. I'll get his bottles and pacifier in the sterilizer and bring them to you ok." she said and watched me bound away to my room.

Once I was in my room, I got all my extra things I might need and pulled my trunk into Jason's room, got all of his things, like teddy bears, story books, his little portable cot etc., into my trunk and pulled it down stairs and met up with Harry, Ron, Jason and my mum in the living-room. Harry holding Jason, Ron holding the sterilizer, my mum holding my sisters and me holding my trunk.

"Are we ready?" Ron asked.

Harry and I nodded and I kissed my mum and my sisters good bye and stood in the fire place.

"We are we headed Ron?" I asked.

"Grimmauld Place." Ron answered.

I nodded, took a bit of Floo Powder from the little sack Harry was holding, dropped it into the ashes in the fireplace while shouting, "GRIMMAULD PLACE!" and flames erupted around me, transporting me to Grimmauld Place. Harry and Ron following.

Mrs Weasley came over to me and hugged me tighter than before and whispered in my ear, "I'm so glad you've come away from that hell hole! Your father can't keep doing this to you."

How the hell did she find out? I wondered.

She let go of me and I walked upstairs with Harry and Ron to where Harry's room was.

"How was your summer?" I asked Harry.

"Same as all the other summers with the Dursleys. Torture." Harry stated. "How about you, 'Mione?"

I don't know why, but my heart fluttered for the second time. But then I realized that…

They don't know me. They don't want to know the torture I've been through. I could easily lie to them, say everything was fine. But Harry would find out eventually. But still…

They Don't Know Me.

3. Horrors of the past returning?

Hermione Granger’s pain

Chapter 3: Horrors Of The Past Returning?

“I’m sorry, Harry. I’m kind of tired. I’ll tell you tomorrow.” Hermione said and fled from the room and into hers which was adjacent to Harry’s and Ron’s rooms. She sat on her bed singing to herself.

“Notice me, take my hand.

Why were we strangers when I loved you so.

Why carry on without me?

Every time I try to fly

I fall.

Without my wings, I feel so small,

I guess I need you baby.

And every time I see you in my dreams.

I see your face, it’s haunting me.

I guess I need you baby.

I make believe that you are here.

It’s the only way I see clear.

What have I done?

You seem to move on easy.

Every time I try to fly

I fall

Without my wings, I feel so small

I guess I need you baby.

And every time I see you in my dreams

I see your face, you’re haunting me.

I guess I need you baby.

I may have made it rain.

Please forgive me

My weakness caused you pain.

And this song’s my sorry.

Ohhh

At night I pray

That soon your face

Will fade away

Every time I try to fly

I fall.

Without my wings, I feel so small.

I guess I need you baby.

And every time I see you in my dreams

I see your face, you’re haunting me.

I guess I need you baby.”

Jason’s cries disturbed Hermione’s thoughts and she saw Harry come through the door carrying Jason.

Hermione held out her arms and Harry laid Jason in them.

“Shh. Jason, it’s ok. Everything will be alright.” Hermione soothed. Jason soon slowly stopped crying and looked at his surroundings, looking confused-looking curious.

Then Mrs Weasley walked in the room.

“Dinner’s ready, dears.” she said. She then looked at Jason.

“Hermione, I’ll look after him for you, ok?” Mrs Weasley suggested.

Hermione nodded, handed Jason carefully over to Mrs Weasley and walked downstairs to the kitchen, Harry holding her hand tight.

After dinner, the infamous trio of Gryffindors started talking. Whenever Ron was talking, Hermione’s mind was else where, whilst when Harry was talking, she was listening to every word he was saying.

4. Harry's secret found out

Chapter 4: Harry’s Secret found out.

Ron looked up from his food towards his two best friends. His jaw fell at the sight of them holding hands. Hermione giggled, let go of Harry’s hand and walked outside to Ginny, who was practicing Quidditch. Ginny wanted to try out for the Beater position.

“Bring the bat back, love!” Hermione shouted to her friend and laughed.

“Right back at you Hermione!” Ginny teased.

Harry walked beside Hermione, handing her his Firebolt. She carefully climbed onto it and chased Ginny around the Quidditch Practice pitch.

“MI MI!” shouted a little girl’s voice Hermione knew so well. She looked down and saw Britney, Leah and Nicola looking up at her and Ginny.

Hermione landed gently in front of the girls and hugged them tight.

Harry saw Fred Weasley, one of the Weasley twins, standing in the shadowy part of the garden, grinning from ear to ear.

Harry mouthed to Fred, "why are you grinning like that?"

Fred made a swift motion with his hand, as if telling Harry to follow him. So he did.

“Harry, I know you love Hermione, and I also know you don’t like seeing her upset, scared or whatever.” Fred told him knowingly.

“Who the hell have you been talking to?! How the fuck do you know I love Hermione?” Harry asked, blushing at his last sentence.

“I hear things.” Fred said airily and smiling. He walked away, leaving Harry blushing bright red at how Fred found out about his infatuation with his female best friend.

Ron could’ve told him. Harry thought.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Short Chapter, I know. Please review!

5. Un-break My heart

Chapter five: Un-break My Heart

“’Mione. I need to talk to you.” Harry said and gently took her hand and pulled her away into the house.

“Harry, what is it?” Hermione asked.

Harry took out a little piece of paper and handed it to Hermione.

“Do you know anyone by the name of Navarone?” he asked. She nodded and started to read the letter.

When she had finished, her eyes glistened and glimmered with tears.

Harry wrapped his arms around her. That’s when she broke down in tears.

Soon, her sobs calmed down until they eventually came to a stop.

“Mione, what’s up?” Harry asked.

“Navarone was my boyfriend. This letter told me he was breaking up with me. I loved him so much!” Hermione explained in a pained whisper.

It hurt Harry so much to see her this upset.

Don’t leave me in all this pain.

Don’t leave me out in the rain.

Come back and bring back my smile.

Come and take these tears away.

I need your arms to hold me now.

The nights are so unkind.

Bring back those nights when I held you beside me.

Un-break my heart.

Say you’ll love me again.

Undo this hurt you caused.

When you walked out that door.

And walked outta my life.

Un-cry these tears.

I cried so many nights.

Un-break my heart.

My heart.

“He said I’ve been cheating on him with either you or Ron.” Hermione explained again.

“Why would he say such a thing about his own girlfriend?” Harry asked, anger rising inside him every moment. He was angry because someone he hardly knew but knew he was his girl best friend’s boyfriend had hurt her so much.

“I don’t know. My mind is so messed up at the moment!” she said and rested her body against Harry’s.

“Harry, please could you do me one thing?” Hermione asked.

“Anything.” Harry declared, lifting her head so he could look into her eyes.

“Un-break my heart.” was all Hermione said before tears began to roll down he cheeks again and cried into Harry’s chest as he held her tight.

Take back that sad word goodbye.

Bring back the joy to my life.

Don’t leave me here with these tears

Come and kiss this pain away.

I can’t forget the day you left.

Time is so unkind.

And life is so cruel without you here beside me.

Un-break my heart.

Say you’ll love me again.

Undo this hurt you caused.

When you walked out that door.

And walked outta my life.

Un-cry these tears.

I’ve cried so many nights.

Un-break my heart.

My heart.

Ron, who had heard Hermione crying, went in to see what was up.

When he found her, he saw Harry holding her tight.

“Ronald?” a soft voice came from behind him.

He turned around and saw Luna Lovegood standing next to him, with her hand on

his shoulder.

“When did you get here, Luna?” Ron asked.

“Just a few minutes ago.” Luna answered and pulled Ron into a hug.

Ron was beginning to wonder whether or not he started to feel more than just hatred towards Luna.

“Luna, I… I think I like you… a lot.” Ron said, his face going as red as his hair with embarrassment.

Luna smiled and said, “I think I like you too, Ronald. I think I like you a lot.”

Hermione stopped crying once again. She lifted her head, but as she did so, Harry bent his head down and their lips met.

Hermione’s eyes were as big as bludgers at first, but when she got used to it, she closed her eyes and let Harry kiss her.

Don’t leave me in all this pain.

Don’t leave me out in the rain.

Bring back those nights when I held you beside me.

Un-break my heart.

Say you’ll love me again.

Undo this hurt you caused.

When you walked out the door.

And walked outta my life.

Un-cry these tears.

I cried so many, many nights.

Un-break my.

Un-break my heart.

Oh baby.

Come back and say you’ll love me

Un-break my heart.

Sweet darlin’.

Without you I just can’t go on!

Can’t go on!

6. I Love You

Chapter 6: I love you

Ginny had got bored out on her own and decided to go to her room.

When she was about to go upstairs, there was a knock at the door. Ginny opened the door and saw, to her surprise, Lucius and Draco Malfoy standing in the doorway.

“Is your father here?” Lucius asked. Ginny knew by the tone of his voice, was clearly annoyed with Draco and horrified that he had to come into the house.

Ginny let Lucius and Draco inside and ran upstairs to her father.

A few minutes later, Ginny came back down with her father, Mr Weasley.

“Ginny, take Draco up to your room.” Mr Weasley said once he saw both Malfoy’s in the house.

Ginny and Draco looked shocked and horrified. After a few thinking moments,

Ginny agreed and pulled Draco (A/N: by the hand J) up to her room.

When they got into her room, Ginny reluctantly let go of Draco’s hand. She all of a sudden felt cold and lonely. As if Dementors were behind her closed bedroom door.

Draco saw the loneliness in her deep hazel coloured eyes, but didn’t ask what was wrong.

During those few moments, walking up the flights of stairs, Draco felt like the little hollow part of his heart had been filled.

When Ginny’s soft hands held his, he felt like he could fly. Fly without a broom. Fly without wings. But when she released his hand, he felt the awkwardness in her hand. He tried to hold on to her, but his hand and mind wouldn’t let him. He began to wonder if he was starting to feel something for the youngest Weasley. Could it have been love?

He reached out and took her hand gently and pulled her slowly towards his body.

Ginny looked up at Draco. Her hazel eyes showing confusion in them.

Draco bent his head and kissed her on the lips.

Suddenly, a wave of emotion flew through both Draco and Ginny’s bodies.

Ginny pulled away. She looked into his cold silvery grey eyes.

“Why me?” she asked softly.

“Because you’re the only one who’s shown me how to know what love truly is in a matter of a few moments.” Draco explained.

Ginny smiled, gently wrapped her arms around Draco’s neck and kissed him.

Draco responded, gently guided her to her bed and laid her down, still kissing her. He then moved his head to her neck and started planting butterfly kisses up and down her neck. Ginny moaned quietly in pleasure and put one of her hands on the back of Draco’s head to push him down even more towards her.

“Draco, I love you” Ginny breathed.

“I love you too, Ginny” Draco muttered then captured her lips with his own.

He moved his hand up Ginny’s shirt and let his hand travel round her back to undo her bra clasp. His hands then came from under her shirt, unbuttoned it and took it off her body and then taking her bra off.

Whilst all this was happening in Ginny‘s room, downstairs, Hermione was now sitting under a tree with Jason in her arms and Harry, his arms wrapped around her protectively from behind.

She was humming a soft lullaby, sending Jason off into his dreams.

“I’m so glad that Jason and my sisters are out of my dad’s way.” Hermione said.

“Why?” Harry asked.

“Because my dad wouldn’t think twice about killing them right there and then. I wonder how Britney, Leah and Nicola got here anyway.” Hermione explained.

“I think I can put a stop to that wonder. Fred brought them here.” Harry said, smirking.

“Oh. Well, the reason I got Jason out of there first was because he was in more danger. My dad didn’t want another child. He thought four was enough. He’s been abusive to his own wife and daughters since Leah and Nicola were five years old. It’s gone on for two years.” Hermione explained. “But my fears are all over. Now that I have you.” she added, smiling.