Setbacks and Inspirations

kkkkkellllly12

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 5
Published: 06/01/2005
Last Updated: 29/07/2006
Status: in_progress

Lily is an extraordinary girl, and in more ways than one. In her 6th and 7th years of Hogwarts, she finds new love, friendship and courage as she endures some of the toughest circumstances she will ever have to face.

Chapters

1. All Was Great

2. Numb

3. What a Predicament

4. Trains are Trouble

5. Magical Goggles

6. Revelation

7. There’s a First Time for Everything

8. Filthy Mud

9. Awkward Silences

1. All Was Great

Disclaimer: All characters and things recognized belong to J.K Rowling and the books she has authored.

Characters:

Lily Evans - main character

Charlie Baits - Lily's best friend

Riley Kit - Lily's best friend

James Potter - Gryffindor Co-Captain

Sirius Black - Fellow sixth year Gryffindor

Remus Lupin - Prefect

Peter Pettigrew - Fellow sixth year Gryffindor

Setbacks and Inspirations

Chapter One - All Was Great

Lily was sitting patiently on a city bus, slowed by traffic, in downtown London. After an eventful day of shopping with her closest friends from Hogwarts, she was grateful for a quiet and peaceful ride home. She was surrounded with shopping bags occupying more than four seats; though it didn't really matter for the bus was practically empty.

Such a long, quiet ride home gave Lily time to reflect. She was to become a sixth year Gryffindor student, prefect and Quidditch co-captain.

In her five previous years at the Wizarding School, she had worked her hardest and had sacrificed plenty to excel in all of the ways she did. By her third year, Lily had decided she would become an auror once she graduated and would earn herself an impressive position in "The Order" alongside Charlie's parents. There she would undoubtedly take part in Voldemort's downfall.

If this plan somehow fell through, she would become a professional Quidditch player, because she was a stunning keeper.

Lily let out a satisfied sigh as she thought of what it would be like to be an auror.

I would be saving lives and arresting maniacs while receiving impressive paychecks. Not too shabby, she marvelled as the bus slowly made its way through London's busy streets.

Just two more years and I'll be rid of Petunia, homework, and silly rules.

***************************************************************

Lily opened her magazine skimming through its contents, waiting tolerantly for home to grow near.

Tonight, she mused, I'll write to Riley and Charlie, to confirm of course, when we'll gather at the barrier of the Hogwarts Express.

She laughed quietly at the thought of her friends.

She quite accurately predicted their reactions to her new wardrobe. Once they saw all of her purchases, Charlie would give lectures for spending so much on clothing, while Riley would want to try everything on.

Riley and Charlie; Charlie more formally known as Charlotte; were Lily's best friends, and despite their highly obvious differences, they were supportive and cared greatly for one another.

Charlie - the wallflower - was the forgettable type. Always quiet, an endless dreamer, she seemed to connect with Lily from the beginning. Charlie's innocent vulnerability was what had appealed to Lily, and Lily's strength to Charlie. At just five feet, she was neither short nor tall. She had unremarkable brown hair and eyes to match. There was innocence and hidden loyalty within Charlie that most didn't see. It was rather endearing. She had few friends (three maybe), but the friends that she did have were the ones who knew she was a sweet, innocent, loyal girl. The friends that she had were the kind that lasted a lifetime.

Riley was the opposite of both Lily and Charlie. She was completely unpredictable and appallingly blunt. You could never be certain whether she was content or angry most of the time. Even Lily and Charlie- who had both known her for over five years- hadn't completely solved Riley Baits, the puzzle. Things they had discovered after all of these years however were that she was compassionate, always honest (even at the worst of times) and extremely charming. Riley like Lily and unlike Charlie tended to stand out in crowds. With purple eyes and raven hair she could nearly sit on, who wouldn't?

Lily Evans was what you could call "cool calm and collected". Despite those ridiculous old wives tales of redheads and their "fiery" tempers, Lily rarely lost hers. She was always considered reasonable and one who usually solved problems with a composed demeanour. Lily wasn't what you could call popular. Though she mostly kept to herself, she was generally liked all around for her easygoing and very tolerant attitude. Lily got her attention through her auburn red hair, bright green eyes and porcelain features.

***************************************************************

Eventually Lily's stop came into view, so she got up to stretch and to retrieve her many bags.

She thanked the bus driver as she got onto the road and viewed the familiar surroundings.

She was more or less five minutes from home and it was rather dark out. As she got closer to home, she started to get a nauseous feeling in the pit of her stomach. The kind of feeling you get when you know bad things have happened or are about to. With each step she took the feeling got worse, nevertheless she forced herself to walk faster and faster until she was almost jogging.

She was about to turn the last bend when without warning she was forced to stop dead in her tracks. She stood there unable to move her feet. In a panic, she strained and strained with all her might to release herself but it was no use.

She looked ahead into the street and saw that she was able to see her house from there, which gave her a sense of relief. It looked just as it had when she had left it, which probably meant that her parents were all right.

Just as she thought this thought she felt, sensed rather, someone behind her, which just about gave her a heart attack. Almost too afraid to look she slowly turned. There behind her stood a nightmare. The infamous Lord Voldemort was but a few paces away, smiling maliciously.

Only a few feet away and walking toward her with that evil, knowing smile on his face, he only stopped when they were practically nose-to-nose.

She was frightened now though she'd never admit, as he smiled at Lily, his unsettling red eyes boring into hers.

"So, Lily," he said in a rather laid-back tone for a murderer, "I've wanted to talk to you for quite some time now. I must say, you're very hard to get a hold of for a sixteen-year-old girl. You know…"

"C-c-cut the nonsense Voldemort,” Lily interrupted trying to sound bold, “just tell me what you want, please."

"Now, now have patience dear, I was getting to that you know," he said with a chuckle that didn't quite reach his eyes. "I have a proposition for you Lily, one that you will find very hard to refuse. It has been …"

As he talked, Lily racked her brain for something, anything that might help her get out of this dire situation. As she searched, suddenly a memory appeared in her mind. A memory from a few years back, in second year probably, in the Great Hall with Dumbledore and her peers.

***************************************************************

"You all know of the terrible Dark Lord and his followers now, and how he has been terrorizing many families both Muggles and magical. He has been attacking more recently than ever and there are few things that I can do to guide you. If you wish, before you leave for the summer, a spell cast on you and your family can be arranged. It will keep you hidden from the eyes of those who wish to harm you. Other than that, I don't really know what else to recommend other than a simple spell that you should use if you are ever in danger. If you ever feel threatened, all you must do is cast "Auxilium", and help will be on the way. I hope…"

***************************************************************

That's it! thought Lily, Shit, where's my wand?

Lily then tuned in again to what Voldemort was saying.

"…and that is why you must join us, for you would be the most unlikely to spy, and I've been informed Dumbledore trusts you which makes the idea even better."

"And what if I say no?" she asked trying to buy time as she attempted to look for her wand unnoticed.

"We already went through this Lily, do try to keep up," he replied, evidently annoyed. "As I've already made quite clear, I'll kill your family and your friends and then finally yourself after you've watched everyone you've ever loved suffer."

Thank Merlin! thought Lily as her hand found her wand.

"So, what do you say kiddo, a safe employment under my wing, or an unbearable death for the loved ones?"

"Hmm, you know I think it'd be best if I EXPELLIARMUS!" she yelled to the Dark Lord's surprise. She shouted it with all the strength she could muster as she pointed her wand at his distraught face.

He stumbled back, the unmistakable fury tainting his features. "You shouldn't have done that Lily," he said, his voice dangerously low. "CLAUDUS!"

Lily instantly felt an agonizing pain in her legs as she fell to the ground hard. He was walking toward her again and she knew what she had to do. She pointed her wand skyward and yelled, "AUXILIUM!"'

It was panic tainting his features this time as Voldemort swore loudly, kicked Lily hard and then apparated.

After that, for Lily, all was black.

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2. Numb

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 2 - Numb

Numbness was all Lily felt, or didn't feel, as she slowly regained consciousness. What she did feel was confused. She could barely see and her eyes stung immensely from the bright lights that seemed to surround her.

Lily, who was beginning to panic, frantically searched her surroundings for something, anything that looked familiar. Everything was blurry, something that scared her even further. She couldn't move her body and as she frantically searched for signs that weren't there, Lily started to remember the events that had happened between Lord Voldemort and her.

She sensed movement to her left. She turned to see a blurred figure approach her, only to walk off in a hurry.

“She's awake!” called a familiar voice in the distance. “Merlin, she's awake! Contact Joseph and Julie immediately and inform them that their daughter is finally conscious.”

About ten seconds later, the figure with the familiar voice returned. This time she was with a few others who were dressed in white robes.

Lily tried to speak, but no sound escaped her lips except those of painful coughs resulting from an extremely dry throat.

“Don't try to speak Miss Evans,” said a man's voice. “I know you must be confused, so I would like to inform you that everything is under control. Professor McGonagall and I will explain all there is to know.”

As Professor Dumbledore spoke, someone who had to be a nurse brought a sweet smelling liquid to her lips. “It will cure your throat miss,” she explained, so Lily swallowed it.

“Professor Dumbledore is that you?” asked Lily, feeling the liquid come into effect almost immediately.

“Indeed Miss Evans, now let us explain.”

“Eight days ago,” Professor McGonagall began, “in case you do not remember, you had a rather horrible encounter with the Dark Lord.”

“Do you remember anything about this encounter Lily?” asked Dumbledore.

“Yes, yes of course I remember. Where am I exactly Professor?”

“You're in St. Mungo's Hospital. You have been for eight days now,” replied Minerva McGonagall.

“I heard my parent's names earlier. Where are they? Voldemort didn't harm them did he?” Lily asked worriedly.

Though Minerva flinched at Voldemort's name, she answered. “Your parents weren't hurt at all. Your parents aren't permitted to enter a magical hospital, and that's why they aren't here now.”

“What's wrong with my eyesight, I can hardly see anything,” said Lily, a little more relaxed now.

“It must be an unavoidable side affect from the curse He Who Must Not Be Named threw upon you. The healer said it should wear off in a few weeks,” Dumbledore answered. “Do you have any more questions before we must leave you? I know you must be extremely curious after all that has happened.”

Lily thought for a while and then decided to ask, “Why me? I know he said that no one would suspect me as a spy, but that doesn't explain much. Why would the strongest dark wizard want any Muggleborn, a Mudblood, to join him? I just don't understand.”

“Well,” said Dumbledore, “there are a few things that I haven't exactly been honest to you about all these years.”

Quite puzzled, Lily replied, “Well, what is it then?”

“Hmm, how to explain, how to explain,” mumbled the elderly professor. “Well, I guess I'll just explain everything.”

If anything, Lily looked more curious.

“Since the beginning of time,” he began, “with every new generation, a certain kind of person has been born. Either magical or Muggle, it has not seemed to matter. These, well, these certain kind of people are truly special Lily, and unique in their own ways. It is hard to describe them, hard to classify them, for they are never the same as the certain kinds of people who have been born before them. You Lily Evans, are your generation's truly special and unique, certain kind of person.”

Lily tried to think about this for a minute.

“I'm sorry professor, but if anything, you have managed to confuse me even further,” Lily admitted regretfully.

Professor McGonagall wisely intervened, “Lily you, are what is known to be an Unknown. You are the Unknown of your generation. We, the ministry, Professor Dumbledore and I, have known since your third year.”

“Yes, it came as quite a surprise actually. One day we're in the middle of a meeting, and then all of a sudden a woman beside me has gone cross-eyed and has started reciting a prophecy. The prophecy being delivered was about you.”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,” interrupted Lily. “Aren't you going to tell me more about these Unknown people? What can they do? I mean I'm already satisfied with being a witch and everything, but this sounds interesting.”

“Well,” answered Albus, “that's the thing. All Unknowns have different talents and usually they are extremely well hidden. It's impossible to know what to expect. An Unknown's talents are famous for showing up rather unexpectedly.”

“Really, well that doesn't explain why Voldemort would want me to join him. For all he knows my powers could be somewhat, well, shitty.

Minerva frowned at this while Dumbledore chuckled. “I'm guessing that he does not want to take a chance. Some of the most powerful wizards have been Unknowns.”

“Merlin,” said an overwhelmed Lily.

“You're correct,” he said, eyes twinkling.

“Sorry?” she asked.

“You're right, Merlin was an Unknown.”

“You're joking!” accused Lily, astonished.

“No joke,” said Dumbledore, a slight laugh in his tone. “Now, your parents were extremely frightened by this whole ordeal. Your friends were as well. They couldn't come to see you however. The ministry wouldn't allow it.”

“Well why not?”

“I'm not sure actually,” replied the Professor. “But to your right, you will find quite a lot of treats and presents that they managed to send you. There are some from your parents as well.”

Lily reached out and sure enough, there was a mountain of things. She felt a twinge of comfort as she thought of Riley, Charlie and her parents.

Not noticing, professor Dumbledore looked at his watch and then back at Lily. “I'm really sorry about this, but Minerva and I have much important business to attend to. We must be going now.”

“Already? But I have so many more questions to ask you. Like…like why I can't move?”

“Miss Evans, we really must be leaving now. I'm sure this is just another curable side-affect,” responded Minerva, patting her leg before walking toward the door with Dumbledore. “Get some rest; I'm sure we'll see you sooner than later, at Hogwarts of course. Take care Lily.”

“I've had quite enough rest thank you,” Lily grumbled sullenly, as they walked out the door.

Lily was mistaken though as she found herself drifting of to sleep.

********************************************

She awoke as she heard footsteps again toward her left. The voice that then spoke revealed the intruder to be a man.

“Hello Miss Evans, I'm Mr. Hopkins, your healer.”

“Pleased to meet you,” she replied groggily. “What seems to be the problem? You know, besides the fact that I can barely move or see.”

The healer sat down on a chair beside her. This made her realize that he definitely didn't have good news.

“Well, we did some tests and as you probably already know; you were cursed with Claudus.”

“Go on,” urged Lily.

“Well, this curse is pretty new and not many people have been affected by it. This means we don't know much about it. Miss Evans, this means we don't know the cures to some of its effects.”

Lily didn't like the sound of this and was beginning to regret asking what was wrong with her.

“We know that the curse causes blindness, it paralyses and it causes the victim to become mute. So far, we've found cures for the blindness and as is obvious, the effect it has on a person's talking abilities. We have not, however, been able to find any cure for the paralysing effect Lily and I'm sorry to say that until we find a cure, you won't be able to walk.”

“How long have you been looking for one Sir?” she asked, holding back tears and starting to feel faint.

“It's been years,” he admitted, sounding somewhat guilty.

Lily was dumbfounded. She didn't know what to do, or say, or think. This healer was telling her that she would probably never walk again.

And once more for Lily, all was black.

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3. What a Predicament

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 3 - What a Predicament

The next week and a half were painful and unbearable for Lily. After undergoing numerous tests that never seemed to have promising or unexpected results, she was feeling miserable and depressed.

*************************************************************

As Lily woke up a few hours after she had first blacked out in the hospital. She felt a heavy weight on her stomach. She reached to feel the feathers of an unfamiliar owl. She felt for the parcels he carried and found them. After they were untied from the owl's legs, she fed him some of the chestnuts she had discovered earlier from the pile of things at her right side. He was gone almost instantly.

`This isn't very good,' thought Lily. `I've got plenty of mail and I can't even read it.'

Her vision was still terrible.

She threw the parcels aside, rather frustrated. Understandably, Lily was still quite shaken by the fact that she might never walk again. She might never be able to play Quidditch, and the ministry couldn't possibly want a paralysed auror.

She had taken so many things for granted in the past. Never had she dreamed of something like this happening to her. In her mind, she would have to start completely anew. Not only would she need a new and completely different dream, a new and completely different lifestyle would be needed as well. Her old plan seemed unreachable now. She would need a new one. For the moment though, she would just settle on a little bit of crying.

Sometimes, it feels good just to cry.

***************************************************************

Three days later, her eyesight was back to normal and she was as miserable as ever.

“Well,” said Mr. Hopkins. “We just need to perform a few more tests and then you should be able to go home. Your eyesight has undoubtedly recovered along with your speaking abilities. ”

Extremely grumpy and pessimistic from endless hours of doing nothing but tests, Lily simply glared at him and said, “I'm not going through any more of your tests. They are a waste of time.”

“You should take the tests for your own good, but I'm not here to force you into anything.”

“Good,” she said. “You aren't as stupid as I thought you were.”

The healer stood, all the while hiding a small grin behind his hand. “Well thank you, I think.”

“You're welcome.” Her anger receded and a tiny smile touched her lips.

“You can leave in a day, and you can take the wheelchair you've been using if you like,” He headed for the door. “And you should answer those letters. They must be worried sick about you.”

“Wait, Healer!”

“Yes?” he asked, poking his head back inside her room.

“Do any of them know about me being, you know, paralysed?”

“I'm pretty sure no one from the hospital has informed them. I think only Professor McGonagall or Dumbledore could have.”

“Alright.”

She reached for the letters and grabbed all three. One was from her parents, one from Riley, and the other from Charlie.

*****************************************

Dear Lily,

This has to be the twentieth letter I've written and I have gotten absolutely no response from you. Please tell me you're alright! They won't tell us anything (bloody ministry) and we've been so worried; Riley and I that is.

I have a feeling the ministry has been monitoring all of my out-going mail, so I sent this letter from my uncle's house. I also sent one for your parents and another for Riley.

Anyway, I have no idea what has happened to you or how you are now. All I know is that you're in St. Mungo's Hospital. Riley and I made sure to get you your favourite sweets, lollies, and such. You see, my mother is friends with one of the nurses and, well, you could say she did us a few favours. She won't tell us anything about you either though.

We tried to visit you a few times but there's just no getting past the ministry's watchful eye! Please, if there is anything we can do for you just tell us!

Love,

Charlie

P.S. Please talk to Riley for me. I think she's quite scared for you. I mean, she looks as cool as a cucumber but deep inside she's undoubtedly downright frantic about everything!”

P.P.S. My mum and dad also send to you their love.

***************************************************************

Lily

Please tell me you're okay because Charlie's been such a mess. Everyday I've been getting loads of letters from her. They're more like notes actually. Usually one-liners. `What if she's not alright?!', `What would we do without her?!', `Oh Merlin, what should we do?!'

Lily, I think she's driving me mad.

I know you're all right. It's really Charlie I'm worried about. You should really try to contact her, you know, to calm her down a bit.

Anyway, don't be afraid to ask if you need or want anything. We have our sources. No joke. ;)

If you want to contact me, just send your letter to Charlie's uncle (the bloke with the mole, not the blond one). And, you know, I really wouldn't mind knowing how you are and what's happened to you.

Yours Truly,

Riley

P.S I'll see you on the train on Thursday. Don't be late.

**********************************************************************

Lily

My God am I furious! It's been nearly two weeks since we've heard a word of you! The bloody wizards at the ministry are too stubborn for their own good. They have no right! I mean, you are our daughter; we should have some means of contact! It's just not right!

Anyway, how are you Lily and what in hell happened? First thing you know you're setting the dinner table and the next, there's a stampede of Aurors coming through the front door. They wouldn't explain anything or even let us see you. At least Dumbledore told us that you would be all right. That calmed your mother and me down a tad.

Please send us news as to how you are doing, and to what in hell has happened. We are still very worried!

Love,

Your Mom and Dad

P.S Petunia says hello.

***************************************************************

Lily got out some parchment and a quill, not sure how to respond. She didn't want her friends to worry and she knew that they would if they knew the truth about her condition. Her parents however, she would have to tell, since she would be seeing them tomorrow.

She wrote to Charlie, Riley and her parents, telling her friends that she was all right and that she would explain everything on the train. She related to her parents, however, the whole truth.

“Send these to Charlie's uncle,” She said to her owl Bay. “The one with the mole.”

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4. Trains are Trouble

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 4 - Trains Are Trouble

Lily's parents were reasonably upset when they found out about her condition. Not possibly as upset, though, as Lily was presently. In two days, she would have to face her friends and would have to tell them the truth about what had really happened. She would also have to face her school and most dreadfully, the Slytherins.

During the past few days, Professor Dumbledore had visited her. He had smoothed things over with her parents and had informed them that they must go into hiding as soon as Lily's first term started. When Lily admitted how self-conscious she would feel if she entered the train platform and all eyes were on her, he kindly suggested that she arrive earlier than usual. He told her that the train was usually at the platform two hours before anyone got there.

Joseph and Julie Evans were very surprised when they learnt the details of what had happened. They made sure to be as supportive as possible toward Lily. They wanted her to feel comfortable, cared for, and most of all they didn't want her to give up hope. Her sister, Petunia, was another story.

When Lily had gotten her first Hogwarts letter, her parents had been so proud and Petunia's jealousy had grown with each coming year. Unknown to anyone else, the night Lily had left for Hogwarts for the first time, Petunia had promised herself something that she swore never to forget. The night Lily left, Petunia had been filled with so much anger that she had made an oath never to feel anything for Lily relating to love ever again. Knowing Petunia to occasionally hide her true feelings, Lily thought she might be going through nothing but some kind of phase. Years of snarky comments proved Lily wrong. Every conversation they had only seemed to cause them to drift further apart.

***************************************************************

Lily was making her way back to her room in her wheelchair after dinner. Dumbledore had conjured up ramps for her for all of the stairways in her house. She was growing accustomed to the wheelchair, though she knew that she would never actually grow to like it.

As she turned a corner, Lily barely managed to miss running over her beloved sister's foot.

Petunia looked down at her with annoyance. They held each other's eye before someone broke the silence.

“You're not going to get any pity you know, just because you can't walk anymore,” stated Petunia, her voice neither cold nor kind.

“I never asked for your pity, I never will,” replied Lily, her voice equal in emotion.

Petunia looked at Lily searchingly. “Well than at least something is understood between the two of us.” There was a pause before she said, “you know, it was always things like these that made me content about being nothing like you.”

“Things like what?” Lily asked testily.

“You're always stubborn Lily, in your own little world where everything revolves around you… and you're always asking for trouble.”

Petunia watched for any reaction. There was none.

Lily seemed to have no response to this, so Petunia wordlessly made her way around her sister, and then back down the stairs. Before she turned the next corner though, she threw Lily one last glance.

In her eyes, a look of sorrow could be seen. It couldn't have been sorrow though, for Petunia had a promise to keep. It was a promise that she had made to herself long ago.

With that last glance, that couldn't have contained any sorrow, she left her sister in the darkness of the hall.

Without realizing that Petunia had already left ages ago, Lily finally made her response. “Never have I asked for something like this,” she said staring into the darkness. “Never.”

***************************************************************

Tomorrow Lily would have to board the train and make her way to Hogwarts. She knew she wouldn't have to tell her friends much. The wheelchair would probably explain many things for her. A huge commotion would be made, some weeping from Charlie and some anger from Riley. Lily hated commotions and the more she thought about things, the more she dreaded leaving the security of her home.

After a while of thinking in the solitude of her bedroom, Lily came to a decision. She wouldn't meet her friends on the train and create a scene in public. She would meet them in the privacy of their own dorm rooms.

She woke her owl Bay and attached two parcels to her leg. In her letters, she made sure to inform her friends well. She wrote that she would meet them in the dorms during the feast, after the sorting, when no one would be in the common room. She wrote that she wouldn't be able to make the train because of certain prefect duties Dumbledore had for her, and that she would tell them everything as soon as she could.

Lily knew that since she was doing this, she would have to make an effort in not running into anyone who might recognize her.

If only I had an invisibility cloak, she thought.

First, she would have to find an empty compartment, which would be an easy task since she would be arriving at least an hour early. She would need a disguise and an advanced locking charm for the compartment door.

These should be easy to find as well, she thought.

As she sent her owl off, Lily couldn't help but feel a little at ease. She wouldn't have to confront anyone right away.

She decided to find a proper locking charm first. She racked her brain and thought of all the charms lessons she had endured in the past. In minutes, she thought of a suitable spell. Indeed, Professor Flitwick would be proud.

Now all she had to do was find a suitable disguise. She searched her closet high and low. In the end, she settled for a hooded black sweater, black sunglasses, old jeans, and some black shoes. Once she was on the train, she would be allowed to use magic. She would charm her hair into a different colour and make herself look a little plump. No one would even suspect her to be Lily Evans.

When Lily was sure that she had packed everything she might need at Hogwarts, she decided it was time for bed. For the first time in weeks, she fell asleep almost instantly.

***************************************************************

The next morning, Lily woke up to her ever so annoying alarm clock. After she had her breakfast and was dressed in her disguise, Lily headed out the door two hours earlier than usual.

Before she went through the barrier, she shared a couple of teary goodbyes with her parents. They hugged and kissed, and then Lily was on her way. She gave them a wave before she pushed herself and her luggage through the barrier.

As she entered, she looked around in awe. She had never known how big the place was. There had always been so many people before.

She wheeled herself toward the train and as she did, someone stepped out of it. At first, Lily was alarmed, but when she realized who it was, she was worried no longer. It was just Mr. Boyle, the driver of the train. He approached Lily with a friendly smile.

“Professor Dumbledore told me to expect you at around this time. I'm just supposed to help you get onto the train along with your luggage.”

Lily offered him a polite smile. “Well that's a relief. I was wondering how I was going to manage doing that by myself.”

He returned her smile before he lifted her luggage and then disappeared onto the train. When he returned, he took out his wand and lifted her with it as well. Once she was aboard with her luggage, she thanked him and he was on his way.

Lily looked around. She had to pick which compartment. Usually she would head to the one she always used with her friends, but this time things were different. She headed toward the back and picked one near the washrooms. Being near them would be convenient.

First, using Wingardium Leviosa, she placed her baggage under the seats. She put Bay on the bench next to the window. Then Lily went to the washrooms to see what she could do about her hair. She had to change its colour. Her hair, along with her eyes, where what she was known for.

She lowered the mirror with a simple spell and stopped it when it was just right. Looking at her reflection, she tried to decide on what to do with herself. Hmm… Blonde, Brunette or Raven coloured. I wonder. She tried the latter. No, I'm wearing too much black already. Maybe Brown. She tried this colour too. I think this it. I'll probably blend right in if anyone breaks my locking charm. With brown hair, she still stood out though. Thank heaven for the sunglasses that would cover the greenness of her eyes.

She tied her hair back and then remembered what else she had to do. She thought back to second year. Potter and she had had an argument; what it was about she couldn't remember. Near the end of the “argument”, quite a few curses had been thrown. One, Lily remembered had made her gain weight. It didn't take her long to think of what it had been. She tried the spell and looked at the result. She pulled her hood up and put her sunglasses on. She was a completely different person.

When Lily got back to the compartment, she lifted herself onto the bench. Lifting her legs up as well, she then transfigured her wheelchair into a pocket-sized contraption that no one would ever notice.

Lily was very exhausted now as she leant back against the wall and into a comfortable position. She found herself drifting off to sleep before she could remind herself to lock the compartment door.

***************************************************************

Lily woke up to the sound of four noisy boys entering her compartment.

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5. Magical Goggles

Disclaimer: All characters and things recognized belong to J.K Rowling and the books she has authored.

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 5 Magical Goggles

Lily's eyes grew wide.

How can I be so stupid? Merlin, all you had to do was lock the bloody door, she thought to herself.

As the rowdy boys entered, she recognized them instantly. It was Peter, Sirius, James, and Remus. This was going to be a long train ride.

She saw Peter Pettigrew first; his small stature stood out next to the three tall boys beside him. His unkempt hair was thin and blonde and his eyes were small and watery. He had a pasty complexion with a rat-like face. Lily had always been interested in him and her curiosity usually annoyed Peter. She didn't know much about him, which kept her intrigued. She did know that he despised Charlie for reasons unknown to anyone but Peter, and that Charlie was quite frightened of him. Riley's feelings were opposite. She was harsh toward him for causing Charlie's discomfort. Peter seemed to worship James and Sirius, but his skill level was nowhere near theirs.

She could see Sirius Black behind Peter. He was taller and had more of a Quidditch player's build, not unlike James. His eyes were grey and fathomless and the hair that hid them was black as coal. Sirius was very good-looking and his laugh resembled a dog's bark. Lily and Sirius were not well acquainted but like most fellow Gryffindor, they had collaborated on many class projects. Through conversation, Lily knew that he was born into a pureblooded family, and that he was the eldest of two sons. When he was sixteen he moved in with James, and his cousins were the infamous Bellatrix, Narcissa, and Andromeda Black.

Beside Sirius was James Potter. His disorderly hair was always the first thing she noticed. Sometimes she wished she could just get her hands on it. It simply could not be controlled, he claimed, but Lily never gave up hope that she might be the one to conquer it one day. Other than his hair, Lily didn't have much interest in him. She was always wary of him, for he was a prankster, though he never attempted anything on her. Neither did Sirius though she didn't know

why. James had been fond of Lily in the past. He would ask her out frequently. Now that they were “mature”, they were now no more than respectable acquaintances, opposed to the hell-raising relationship they once shared. When people asked him about the infatuation, he simply stated, “It was nothing but a silly crush. Challenges, unfortunately, were what usually attracted me. Not anymore though.”

Lily didn't know whether to feel relieved or insulted by this.

The tall boy on the other side of Sirius was Remus Lupin. He and Lily were uncomfortable with each other, though no one, not even them, knew why. In most of their encounters, this resulted in awkward conversations and situations. Remus had light brown hair, his voice was slightly hoarse, and for some reason she could not recall his eye-color. He constantly looked ill or exhausted in the shabby clothes he always wore. Lily also knew he was a half-blood wizard.

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All four boys took a seat opposite her bench. Not one of them seemed to notice Lily. They were conversing as if she was not even there. After ten minutes, her heart started to beat at a normal pace once again. It would take a few more hours to get to Hogwarts and they were bound to notice her sometime. At least she was expecting it and would be prepared.

Lily looked out of the window and at the treetops that they were passing by. Her eyelids slowly started to drift shut and in no time, she fell asleep for the second time that day.

***************************************************************

Two hours passed as Lily dreamt of nothing. She was now gaining consciousness and could just barely interpret what the boys were saying.

“Your parents got you those for you birthday Prongs?” asked Remus.

“Yes they're actually quite neat if I do say so myself.”

“Well, can they do anything?”

“Of course they can Wormtail. They wouldn't be very neat if they couldn't do anything.”

“Do they have a name?” said Remus.

“They're called Goggle Woggles.”

“That sounds ridiculous. Goggle Woggles. What a laugh.”

“Oh, don't be jealous Padfoot. You just wish you owned a pair yourself.”

“Yes. Yes, that's it. I'm jealous of your magnificent Goggle Woggles. They probably can't do anything but I'm jealous of them. Hand them over so we, Woggles and I, can ride off together into the beautiful sunset. I can't wait to touch their soft leather strap, their beautiful, shapely…”

“Please stop him before I lose my lunch,” interrupted Remus.

“If you don't believe me than stand up Padfoot. Over there,” instructed James.

“As you wish master,” he replied rather dryly.

“All right now. What you do is hold them up to your eyes like this and say REVELIO.”

“And?” asked Sirius.

“And Sirius… you're modeling some very stylish boxers with the reddest of red hearts on them.”

“Blimey, that's wicked that is!” exclaimed Peter.

“No it's not. I always wear white boxers with red hearts on them. I've got like, seven pairs!”

“Who cares? They work don't they?” said James, sounding annoyed and offended that his best friend was not impressed.

“Of course they work. What kind of boxers don't work?”

“Oh you're so funny Padfoot. I can't help but laugh my arse off. Please stop. I can't breathe. I…”

“Whatever.” Sirius interrupted, “they sound useless if you ask me.”

“No one did ask you. Just drop it,” demanded James.

“Well why don't you let me try them if they're so brilliant,” he responded in an exasperated tone.

“Why should I? They're useless remember?” was James' retort.

“Well that doesn't matter. Useless things can be pleasant. Now hand them here.”

“Just let him try them Prongs. He might never stop talking if you don't,” ordered a tired Remus.

“Moony's right Prongs. If you don't let me try them, I might never ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…ever…

ever… ever…ever…ever…”

“Okay, okay. Take them and shove off you git.”

“A million thank yous my dove, my flower, my…”

“I said shove off Padfoot.”

There was a little bit of a shuffling noise provided by Sirius before she could here him beginning.

“REVELIO!” he shouted. “Nice undershirt Wormtail. Really, it's a nice touch. Hmm… boxers or briefs Moony? REVELIO! Boxers, good choice.”

As Lily heard more shuffling, she began to awaken further.

“You know, these could come in handy. With girls, I mean. What were your parents thinking giving you a device that can see through clothes?”

The shuffling was coming closer and Lily began to realize what was about to happen. Before she could stop him, Sirius shouted a final “REVELIO!”

Lily opened her eyes in terror to see a tall figure towering over her. It was definite that it was Sirius concealed behind the bizarre looking glasses.

He was completely quiet and motionless before he let out a roar of “BLOODY HELL!”

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6. Revelation

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 6 - Revelation

James looked at the disguised Lily with a look of excitement.

“What?” he shouted, “Does she have nice knickers?”

Sirius glanced at Lily out of the corner of his eye and then back to James. Not knowing how to respond, his answer was unimpressive.

“Well…,” was his only reply.

“What?!” yelled James again, “Are they red ones? Give me the goggles; I want to have a try.”

He stood up and approached Sirius. He tried to grab the goggles away but Sirius quickly held them out of reach. James, not seeming to notice that the girl who owned said knickers was very much awake, leaped for the goggles and was almost successful. If she had not been so terrified, Lily would have thrown something at him.

“Well. Uh. My goodness, look at the time!” exclaimed Sirius after withstanding James's offences, “We're almost there. Out of the room you three it's time to change into proper attire. Two at a time people, two at a time. It'll get messy otherwise.”

Sirius physically removed his friends who seemed to be too confused to argue. Once they were skillfully shoved into the hall he slammed the door shut, frantically charmed it locked, put a silencing charm on the room, and then turned back to Lily. She was still bewildered.

He said nothing and with each second that passed, she began to feel more and more awkward. After a while he whispered, “Evans? Merlin, is that really you?”

Lily didn't answer. He moved closer.

Looking down at her he said, “Evans, I know it's you. The goggles saw right through your spell.”

So it's out then, thought Lily, he's going to tell everyone. She gradually let out the breath that she had been holding in so tightly.

“Yes, yes it's me,” she confessed.

She looked up at him warily to see Sirius staring at her with an amused expression.

“Why on Earth are you wearing a disguise?” he questioned.

Lily didn't know how to answer. She felt the movement of many butterflies in the pit of her stomach. They felt more like roller coasters actually.

How in hell am I going to talk myself out of this situation?

Lily said the first thing that came to mind. This was one of her many bad habits, saying senseless things when under pressure.

“No reason,” she declared, trying to sound believable. “Just needed some alone time I guess.”

The look of doubt that surfaced revealed that right away he wasn't convinced.

“Oh come on. That's just ridiculous. I want the truth Evans.”

He put the goggles back on.

“You're the one who's ridiculous Black,” she retorted. “You should see yourself in those goggles.”

Maybe I can distract him.

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Don't change the subject luv, come on, what're you hiding?”

Able to tell that he was getting more anxious by the minute, Lily knew things were just getting worse. At this point, she was a bit annoyed by his curiosity. She was starting to understand how Peter must feel about her own interest toward him.

“It's not really any of your -”

He cut her off, “You know I could always invite James back inside. He's always up for a laugh.”

“What do you care that I'm wearing a disguise? It's not half as weird as some of the things you do.”

“Of course it's not. I am a Marauder,” he replied quite proudly, “But if you came across a prefect who was wearing a disguise, Remus for instance, wouldn't you be a little intrigued?”

“No,” she replied stubbornly, “and I'd respect their privacy even if I was.”

“Of course you would,” he remarked sounding annoyed and sarcastic at the same time.

“All right,” she sighed, “you've made your point. I'm still not going to tell you though.”

Sirius grinned at her. A grinning Sirius was never a good thing. “Oooooooh Jaaaamsey!” he wailed.

In a flash, he'd removed the silencing charm and had begun to howl a second time.

“Stop it Black! Stop!” yelled Lily. She desperately grabbed her wand and put the silencing charm back on the room. She frowned in defeat as he smiled in victory.

“I'm not supposed to say anything, the Ministry won't allow it,” she said, pouting.

He raised his wand to remove the charm once again.

“Wait!” she shouted. One person finding out was far more desirable than four.

“I wait for no one Evans,” said a grinning Sirius. He took James' goggles off.

Lily was feeling even more irritated with Sirius's adaptation of cross-examination. She decided in the end though that he didn't have too many bad intentions. Lily knew that she wasn't going to get very far if she didn't tell him. Things would only get more complicated. Her heart started to race once again as she wondered how he would react when she told him.

Here goes nothing, thought Lily.

“Well, long story short,” she started, “I was in an accident, I became paralyzed, and I didn't want to confront anyone till we got to Hogwarts.”

Almost immediately, the smile left his face. He let the goggles drop to the floor.

As he lifted his hands to cover his eyes, he said “Merlin. Lily, I'm sorry. I had no -”

“I know. I'm not angry.”

She offered him a comforting smile. For some reason, now she felt awful.

“How? How did it happen?”

No matter how awful she felt, she knew she couldn't tell him.

“I was in a car accident,” she lied.

Sirius accepted the explanation at first but soon looked confused. Slowly, he sat down on the edge of her bench.

He looked at her with those fathomless eyes.

“Why couldn't you be healed than? If it wasn't a curse…” he trailed off.

Lily did not really know how to answer this time.

She settled with, “I'm not sure why. It was probably too severe to heal.”

He was quiet for a while and she was starting to feel self-conscious. Something about Sirius made her feel this way, unsure of herself. Needing to do something productive, Lily removed her disguise. After a little struggle, she managed to get rid of her sweater as well. Quite efficiently, she had worn her Hogwarts uniform beneath.

When he realized what she was doing, he stood up and faced her.

“Let me help you with the pants Lily.”

And as he did so gently, he wouldn't look her in the eye. She couldn't recall a time when he had ever looked so solemn. She also couldn't recollect any occasion when Sirius had called her by her first name either. He sat back down and looked at his shoes.

“Sirius?” she asked.

“Yes?”

He still wouldn't look at her.

“Sirius, look at me?” she pleaded.

He slowly complied. Again, she smiled reassuringly.

“Forget about it. Really, I'm not angry, I promise.”

As Lily said this, she couldn't help but wonder why they had never truly talked before. They were getting along so well. Of course, Sirius was never like this. He was always a playful, annoying, confident prankster. In previous years they had never really fought, all the same, they had never had any meaningful conversations either.

“I feel awful Lily. Why do I always have to be so…”

“Persistent?” she answered for him, a little teasingly. She really didn't want him to feel so guilty. She knew how that felt.

Sirius, with his elbows on his knees and face in hands, looked the picture of a man in distress. A few moments later, he looked at her again.

“Bloody hell, would you get over it. I said I'm not upset. Besides, the last thing I want is to be pitied. Honestly!”

Sirius stood up again but didn't face her this time. He seemed to have chosen to ignore her previous comment.

“So, none of your friends know?” he asked.

She shook her head in response.

“When are you planning to tell them?”

“In our dormitory. I told them to meet me there during the feast,” she explained.

He turned his head and looked straight at her. He looked away again.

“It's going to be hard to get there you know. Without being spotted I mean,” he mused.

“Not really. I'll just wait till everyone's left. Hagrid's going to leave a carriage behind for me.”

He nodded and considered this for a moment.

“What about James, Remus and Peter? They'll still be outside the compartment. How are you going to pass them? I'm sure they'll be quite interested as to why they were excused so hurriedly.”

Lily frowned.

“I have no idea,” she admitted. “Maybe I could -”

Lily's suggestion was cut short by the loud thundering noises that began booming through the walls of their room.

They both flinched.

“Shit; they're trying to get in,” cursed Sirius.

“I know. What am I going to do?” asked Lily. She was starting to panic again.

“I don't think they'll be able to get in. They shouldn't be able to, unless they use -”

Sirius stopped short as a low rumble shook the small room.

“Ok, they're using them. They're definitely going to get in,” said Sirius, looking apprehensive.

“What are they using? What do you mean they're going to get in? I have to think of something.”

The rumbling was getting louder and louder with each passing second. Sirius looked like he was rooted to the spot, as if he was debating with himself about something. Almost immediately, one side must have won the debate, for Sirius ran to the other side of their room. He ducked under the bench and pulled out a black duffel bag.

“If you think I'm going to hide in that bag you are one sorry git Black,” said an extremely aggravated Lily.

Sirius ignored her again as he hastily pulled a dark cloak from the bag. Sirius approached her again looking more solemn than before.

“This is an invisibility cloak,” he explained quickly. “It's James' and he would kill me if he knew I was showing it to you. Especially you. If I'm to let you use it, you must promise to tell absolutely no one of it and you must put it in our dormitory before everyone gets back from the feast. Everyone's bags will be back by then so you'll have time. Do you understand?”

Lily nodded, a little frightened by this side of Sirius. He'd gone straight from unusually sincere to unnervingly conspiring.

She had to act fast, for the rumbling was becoming louder. She took her now miniature wheelchair and attempted to transfigure it back to its normal size. She failed to, miserably. Potter was good at transfiguration, not her. Sirius swiped it from her, put it on the ground, and did it himself. He lifted her quickly and unromantically dropped her into the chair.

“I just hope it's big enough,” he mumbled before wrapping the cloak around her body and the chair.

Just when he finished adjusting it so that nothing was visible, the rumbling stopped. After a few seconds of silence, a final blast echoed throughout the room as the compartment door flew open. Three Marauders stood behind it with looks of content on all of their faces. Quickly, they changed into looks of displeasure and anger.

James walked in and looked around. “What in hell was that about?” he yelled at Sirius.

Sirius shrugged his shoulders with a look of innocence on his face.

The two other boys followed James and entered the compartment. They looked around as well. Lily moved and ducked quite a lot to avoid being discovered as she moved toward the exit. It was almost impossible doing so with only one hand. Her other was occupied with the task of holding the cloak closed. Lily got there as Sirius told his friends a ridiculous story of how “the girl” had disappeared and how she had controlled his mind to do what he had done.

“She was like, in my head and stuff. I swear!”

As Lily entered the hall, she saw many heads poking out of various compartments. The noise must have drawn almost everyone's attention.

She slowly made her way through. The whole time all she could think of was what would happen if the cloak slipped or if someone decided to leave his or her room as she was passing by it. She seemed to be moving so slow that it was truly agonizing. She had to get to the exit before everyone else, before the train came to a stop. It seemed like every few seconds she was turning her head to look behind her. When was almost halfway there, she turned her head to see someone walking in her direction.

Panicking, Lily looked forward. There was nowhere to go; the hall was too narrow to avoid the person approaching her. Even squeezing toward one of the sides would be useless. She faced forward once again and pushed herself further with all the force she could muster. She held the cloak closed within her teeth. With an extra arm, now she was stronger and could quicken her pace.

She was going much faster however every time she turned to look the person was closer than before. She was almost at the exit but wasn't close enough. She could identify the figure now. It was a seventh year Hufflepuff girl and she was right on Lily's tail. Within seconds, they would surely collide.

Lily stopped pushing forward, closed her eyes and braced herself.

I hate giving up. Nevertheless, what can I possibly do?

Seconds passed and no collision occurred. She turned around and the girl was nowhere to be seen. The door of a compartment just inches behind her slid shut.

Hell that was luck, thought Lily, letting out another held breath as she faced forward once again.

She looked at her watch.

What am I waiting for? She asked herself. She pushed her wheel chair forward again and with no further interruptions, she reached the end.

It was good timing too because just as she did, she felt the train slow to a stop.

The door opened and a ramp appeared for her instead of the usual stair. Deciding not to question this, she rolled down it instead. Lily descended into the cool night air and looked around. Everything was surrounded in darkness as Lily moved so not to block the doorway, and into an area where no one would walk.

People passed her by and made their way to the horseless carriages. Riley and Charlie looked normal and so did Potter's clique compared to their previous excitement. As Sirius passed by, he didn't seem to notice her. Peter looked oblivious and so did James. Remus was closest to her as he walked by and he didn't appear to detect anything strange either.

************************

It took more than half an hour for all of the students to leave. When everyone was gone, Lily took the cloak off and folded it onto her lap. Just then, Mr. Boyle jumped off the train to stand beside her. He cleared his throat and she craned her neck to look up at him.

“Yes?” she asked.

His only response was a long, low whistle. A horseless carriage that seemed to appear from nowhere, stood in front of them.

“Neat trick,” she said, quite impressed.

“Thanks. Have a safe trip Miss Evans.”

“Thank you. I will,” she replied. “I'll see you on Hogsmeade weekend Mr. Boyle.”

He nodded with a smile and disappeared back onto the train.

When she got to the horseless carriage, again the steps turned into a ramp.

Interesting, mused Lily.

******************

The trip to Hogwarts was short, far too short for Lily's liking. In little time she would have to tell her friends everything, well, almost everything. She still didn't know if she should tell them how the entire thing happened.

Lily got out of the carriage and approached the entrance of Hogwarts. As she thought they might, the stairs turned into a slope.

I wonder if Dumbledore had anything to do with this, thought Lily.

She wrapped the cloak back around her shoulders, took a deep breath, and pushed her wheel chair forward once again.

***************

Lily made her way up to her dormitory easier than she had expected. She had encountered no ghosts, no students and to her luck, all of the staircases reacted the same way as she drew near. She was the only one there when she got into the cozy Gryffindor common room and she still had time to spare. Luckily, Dumbledore hadn't forgotten about adjusting the common room door for Lily's use.

As Sirius had instructed, she put James's cloak back into its rightful place in their dormitory. After that, she went to her own and waited restlessly for her friends to arrive. They should have been there already.

“Where are they?” asked Lily aloud.

The almost indistinct sound of Charlie's laughter answered her question.

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7. There’s a First Time for Everything

Setbacks and Inspirations

Ch. 7 - There's a First Time for Everything

Lily squeezed the arms of her chair in anxiety as the door to the room opened to reveal her two best friends. They were carrying three plates, one containing all of Lily's favorite foods. Riley and Charlie, not yet noticing any differences, quickly shut the door behind them, then put the plates on a nearby dresser. As soon as they turned to face her, looks of recognition, which melted into those of confusion, reached their eyes simultaneously.

“What on Earth happened to you?” exclaimed Charlie as she ran to Lily. Crouching beside her, she grabbed Lily's hand.

Riley followed close behind. Looking at Lily's wheelchair in astonishment, she quietly whispered, “It was Him, I just know it was.”

Lily tried to look at both of them, but could not help but feel a little overwhelmed. This was going to be harder then she had expected. Even after all of the times she went over the same situation in her head. Finally, she managed to say something.

Looking down at Charlie, she spoke.

“Riley's right. You-Know-Who cursed me. I was on my way home from the bus stop when he did it.”

“The Dark Lord cursed you? I don't understand Lily, I thought you said you were all right. What kind of curse could have done this?” she asked. Both girls looked nervous, awaiting her response.

“I know. And I'm sorry Charlie. It's just that… I wanted to tell you guys face to face. And I was sort of dreading your reactions. I've sort of been dreading everyone's reaction actually. You've probably never heard of the curse he used. It's called Claudus.”

Based on the silence that followed, she seemed to be right. She decided to elaborate.

“It paralyzes, blinds, and disallows one to speak. They've found cures for the latter two.”

She'd been looking into space as she explained things and when she looked back to Charlie, she saw her friend was already teary-eyed. With Riley's hand supportively on her shoulder, she wiped away her unshed tears in embarrassment.

“So it's permanent then?” asked Riley, voice quite shaky.

“You'll never walk again?” asked Charlie.

“Yah, it is. No, I won't”

Another silence followed until something happened rather unexpectedly even for Lily. For the first time since her stay at the hospital, she started to cry too. Forgetting about everything and everyone else, the girls embraced.

*******************************************************

Later in the day when they were sprawled across Lily's bed, they began to converse once more. Lily talked of what had happened between herself and Voldemort. She told them what had happened on her train ride to Hogwarts, and how Sirius had been undoubtedly and somewhat suspiciously kind.

Charlie, the considerate girl she was, remained quiet as Lily and Riley talked things over. Listening carefully as they talked, Charlie held back the questions that were in her mind, burning in anticipation to be asked. When she could take it no longer, she interrupted Lily's explanations.

“Why would He want to recruit you Lily? With all due respect, you are Muggle-born. Who's ever heard of You-Know-Who recruiting the people he's trying to destroy?”

Though taken aback, Riley seemed to be curious as well. She glanced at Lily questioningly.

Lily sighed as she tried to decide the right thing to do. These were her best friends. Surely, she should tell them what was going on despite the Ministry's wishes. Guilt would without a doubt tear her down as time passed if she lied her way out of this situation. Anyway, just looking at them made her want to spill everything. She knew she could trust him. Instead of lying, Lily told them what Dumbledore had explained to her when she had asked questions similar to Charlie's.

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Now, even more time had passed and they were still sprawled upon Lily's bed. They had talked and talked until it seemed there was nothing left to discuss. They spoke of why Lily was attacked, how she would no longer play Quidditch or even be an Auror, and how she would face the school. Even though Lily felt more at ease after coming clean with her friends, all subjects were worn to the bone. After a while, they sat in silence and although they had discussed things so much, they felt as though nothing had been accomplished.

Riley broke the silence.

“So,” she started, “uh, how do you think you're going to find out what your power is? I've never even heard of an Unknown so I have no idea how to help.”

Lily sighed.

“No one knows how to help. Not even Dumbledore.”

There was another uncomfortable moment of ceased conversation.

Now Charlie sighed.

“You know you could probably still be an Auror. They wouldn't -”

“Fat chance,” Lily interrupted sounding miserable. “Who's ever heard of a crippled Auror? That's just ridiculous.”

“Well you won't get anywhere with that attitude,” she replied, sounding hurt.

“You have to admit though Char, no one would ever hire her. They'd most likely ask if she was mad and slam the door in her face. How would she keep up with the Death Eaters? They're not going to slow down and walk instead of run just because she's in a wheelchair.”

“Well, maybe she can investigate or something. Aurors don't only attempt to blast criminals to smithereens you know.”

“I don't want to investigate. You know that Charlie.”

Charlie let out another sigh.

“They could strap you to your broom maybe. Hold you up with a spell or something. They could attach a chair,” she suggested.

Lily smiled, thinking this was a joke at first. When she looked up to see Charlie's serious expression, she couldn't hold the laughter inside. Riley too was having trouble and soon all three were chuckling to themselves at the image.

“We should feel guilty for finding such things amusing,” said Charlie covering her smile behind a hand.

“I know, but wouldn't the Slytherins be in heaven?” Riley reflected.

Lily sobered at this and then groaned. “Well won't classes be fun tomorrow when everyone sees me for the first time.”

“Lily, we've gone over this a jillion times. Yah, it'll be awkward at first but they'll get over it soon and nobody will even notice the bloody chair,” said Charlie, exasperated.

“I hope you're right,” said Lily, blowing the bangs out of her eyes.

So do I, thought Charlie.

***************************************************************

It was the next day and Lily had yet to leave the safety of her room for the time since she had first entered it the day before. With the encouragement of her friends she felt a little, though not a lot, less terrified about the moments to come.

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With her friends behind her, she descended from her room. The Common room was crowded with anxious students, all prepared for their first classes of the school year. It seemed to Lily that one by one the students began to take notice. The crowd grew more silent as more people saw her.

Different looks marked different features. There was confusion, curiosity, and shock to name a few. She could barely gather the strength to continue, for with every coming second, more eyes were staring. As beads of sweat started to form along her forehead, suddenly she felt herself being pushed by someone and soon she was moving at a quicker pace toward the door.

She couldn't help but look around as the steady hum of whispers filled her ears. People were pointing at her as if she couldn't see them when they did so. There was Stacy from fifth year, blue eyes that seemed to pierce right through her. She could see Jeffrey from Seventh, whispering away with a good friend, looking as if they were trying to solve a mighty puzzle. A girl from first year, she saw, looked more confused then anyone. Of course, the first years didn't know who she was. Then there were the Marauders, away in a corner. They weren't whispering but were silent.

She saw Sirius and they made eye contact. The pity that she hated so much was still there in his grey eyes. She looked to Peter who didn't seem much different then he usually did. As she saw him though, something, a certain kind of awareness, came to life very suddenly in her mind. She now understood even further, why he avoided her curious eyes so much. She mentally cursed herself for giving him such a hard time while not even realizing it. When her eyes reached Remus's, they also looked interested. When he saw her looking, he quickly looked away. He appeared to be scolding himself as Lily had been. Before she could see James's reaction, the reaction most anticipated by Lily, they were at the door and were out in a flash.

“Well,” said Charlie as the door shut behind them, “that wasn't so bad.” She didn't sound too confident as she stated this though, and Riley gave her a look.

Lily let out a long breath and they were on their way to classes. They would skip breakfast this morning. Facing an even larger crowd would definitely be a little more than overwhelming.

Waking up that morning, they had found schedules at their bedsides. They had Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws first. Lily hated the class but Ravenclaws were acceptable

The lesson went well considering the subject, but like in the common room, no one held back his or her stares. Herbology, Potions, Ancient Runes and Lunchtime were not much better and her route to dinner only made things worse. Given her location, she had no choice but to use one of the busiest stairwells in all of Hogwarts.

As now was usual, when Lily approached the first step of a staircase, the entire thing formed a ramp. In result, many unfortunate, unsuspecting students lost their footing and very ungracefully fell, knocking others to the ground as well. Soon, almost the entire stairway was a heap of sprawled students.

Apologizing as much as possible as she passed these victims by, Lily only managed to worsen their condition when she exited the staircase. As soon as Lily's wheel left the end of the stairway, the flat surface transformed back into stairs, and many of the people who had managed to recover lay sprawled on the steps from a second fall. They didn't know what hit them. By the time it was dinner, Lily felt more than emotionally exhausted.

***************************

Lily and her friends entered the Great Hall without the fear they had felt before. During this long day, they had encountered many things that surpassed the scariness of the idea of everyone watching her. After all, they had run into Slytherins.

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8. Filthy Mud

Chapter 8 - Filthy Mud

The Slytherins hadn't acted out of the ordinary at first. They had only sneered, snarled, and the occasional cackle had been heard as Lily and her friends had made their way to the Great Hall for dinner. They had all managed to ignore the Slytherins, that is, until they had advanced upon a rather nasty bunch.

Just when the three Gryffindor were finally feeling somewhat comfortable, the Slytherins seemed to appear out of nowhere. Ten minutes from the Hall now, the only thing that stood in their way was none other than the infamous Lucius Malfoy, Severus Snape, and Bellatrix Black.

“Well, well, well… What do we have here?”

“Nothing much Lucius, just some filthy mud on our turf we ought to get rid of.”

Talking as if the three girls couldn't hear them, Lucius and Bellatrix, weren't shy about showing sneers either. Severus was close behind the two, silent, but looking cruel nonetheless.

Fed up, Riley retaliated, “Oh sod off you three. We're already in our sixth year and you haven't matured in the least since first.”

“I agree,” added Lily. “These… encounters are getting quite repetitive. Nothing we haven't heard before.”

Hoping that this would put an end to the reunion, they moved to continue on their journey toward dinner.

Lucius's cold voice stopped them in their tracks. “So you're saying that you're bored with our conversations?”

“I think that we could arrange them to be more painful, if excitement is what you're after,” continued Bellatrix.

Not waiting for an answer, they rolled up their sleeves revealing strange markings of skulls, snakes escaping through their open mouths. As they raised their wands, so did the Gryffindor, but they weren't fast enough. With all of the other Slytherins lurking around them, they were overwhelmed. They never stood a chance.

Before they knew it, they were being cursed from every angle, by every green robed being. Not one of the three had the chance to fight back and before they knew it, they were growing drowsy from the pain. Losing more of their valuable consciousness with every passing second, they were sure that their wakefulness would end very quickly. No one expected to hear what was heard next.

The sound of the soft purring of a cat filled their ears, even over the loud cries of dark magic. It wasn't the kind of purring that emitted from any normal house cat (or any cat for that matter). It was quite distinguishable and everybody recognized it at once. Looking for the source wasn't necessary as she revealed herself immediately. Walking into the heart of the Slytherin circle, Mrs. Norris's skeletal body easily mounted the heap of students who had crumpled to the floor.

All was silent as her lamp-like, yellow eyes scanned the crowd.

Coming to their senses the Slytherins fled, knowing that wherever the old cat was, Filch was close by.

Minutes passed but no Filch appeared. All three girls were in states of queasiness from all that had been thrown in their direction. On the other hand, the effects of the many spells were starting to ware off; they hadn't been too serious. Riley was the first to rise followed by Charlie. Their movement unsettled the dust-colored creature and she darted off into the darkness.

Now standing, they repaired Lily's broken chair and sat her back into it. Examining the damage that had been done, they found no evidence of their attack, for no wounds marked their bodies. Even though they could hardly bring themselves to move, the Slytherins had created not one scrape.

As they attempted to straighten their tousled appearance, not one word was said and an unspoken agreement was made within the silence. They would take matters into their own hands. For matters had just gotten serious. They were no longer dealing with the hotheaded rivals they had come to know, but with dangerous, reckless abusers of the dark arts. The Slytherins had just crossed the thick line between competitive and dangerous.

Slowly and stiffly, they headed off toward the Great Hall once again.

So now here they were, disheveled and unsatisfied, at the entrance to the Great Hall.

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Of course, all eyes were on them as they opened the doors and entered. The usual intense loudness of the Hall was nowhere near as deafening as the silence filling it now. Even with all of the experience they had gained throughout the day for this type of situation, so much attention still managed to unnerve them.

“Just pretend everything's normal,” whispered Charlie.

“I'm trying to,” answered Lily through gritted teeth.

All three holding their breath, they tried to act “natural” as all eyes were on them. Once they were at the table, they allowed an intake of breath. At least now, they had their backs toward most of the school.

“Well, that wasn't so bad,” said Riley sarcastically.

“It hasn't gotten much easier, has it?” agreed Lily.

“Just give it time. In a week or so, no one will even take notice,” comforted Charlie.

Looking up Lily saw that even the talkative were mute. Almost diagonal from where she was seated was James. Noting the curious gleam in his eye as he gorged down his mashed potatoes, Lily felt the familiar twinge of annoyance from years past.

Well I haven't felt that for a while, thought Lily. Actually, the familiarity of Potter's annoyingness is a bit calming.

She smiled to herself without even noticing.

“What?” asked Charlie, smiling a bit herself.

“Oh… it's nothing. Just thinking of Charms.”

“Sure,” said Riley under her breath.

She looked into the direction in which Lily had been looking and saw James.

Smirking, Riley picked up a golden fork and began some gorging of her own.

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The next morning came and went and in a flash, so had an entire week. Charlie had been right about one thing, and that was that by then things had pretty much died down about Lily being in a wheel chair. People were getting used to staircases unexpectedly turning ramp-like and even the Slytherins seemed to be back to their unpleasant, though harmless selves.

As a whole, the week had been uneventful except for an unpleasant message from Voldemort. It had seemed unoriginal to the girls and unworthy of Dumbledore's time. The girls knew that many muggleborn wizards and witches like herself had received a message of the same kind at least once before. All contained the same threats (toward loved ones) and none had actually been carried through with before.

“Pass the pumpkin juice please,” asked Lily. She held out her hand, without a glance, to receive a pitcher from the person next to her. She was much too indulged in what a Third year was putting down a First year's back. After seconds of no response, she spared a glance toward her left. The bloke hadn't even turned to acknowledge. Leaning over Riley, she tapped his shoulder and he turned to look. It was the boy who always looked sickly, Remus Lupin.

“Pass the juice please,” she said with a friendly smile.

He slid it down toward her with long delicate fingers.

“Thanks.”

Half a smile was his reply.

After a second or two, he turned back and began talking with Peter once again.

Catching Lily off guard, he turned around again just a little while later. Her cheeks turned pink from embarrassment; she hated being caught while looking at someone.

He offered another boyish half smile and said, “Evans, a couple of us are going out to sit by the lake this afternoon. You girls want to come?”

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9. Awkward Silences

Setbacks and Inspirations

Chapter Nine - Awkward Silences

All three girls were quite excited after their words with the mysterious Remus Lupin. Though none would admit it, all three were curious about the boy. In all the years they had been together at Hogwarts, none of them knew much about him. All they did know was that he was one of the three most infamous boys at school.

It was already half past noon and Lily, Riley and Charlie were all anxiously waiting in the Great Hall.

“Maybe we were supposed to meet him at the lake?” said Lily.

“Maybe,” replied Charlie.

“Well, if he were a proper gentleman he'd have come to fetch us,” said an annoyed Riley.

“Fetch us? He isn't a dog Riley.”

“And we aren't objects,” added Lily with a smile.

“Whatever. Feminists,” she mumbled. “Let's go to the lake then.”

The three girls made their way to the doors of the Great Hall. It was quite crowded by then as they made it to their exit slowly but surely. As she approached the door, Charlie reached for its handle. It turned before she could grasp it, and the door opened to reveal four disheveled, chuckling young men.

“Well, well, well. What do we have here?”

A grinning James Potter stood before them, arms crossed and blocking the entrance.

“It seems we have three deserters. What is it girls? Changed your minds about our plans already?”

Sirius looked mock insulted.

Charlie, not realizing that he was only kidding, responded, “Uh, no, no of course we didn't! We were going to go look for you.”

Remus smiled at her genuine worry.

“We decided to come fetch you guys. After all, we like to think of ourselves as proper gentlemen.”

The girls laughed.

Again, Sirius put on a look.

“No need for the harshness, ladies. We're not perfect but we do try to-“

“Oh, it wasn't that we were questioning your manner. Its just, well, an inside joke I guess you could call it,” explained Lily.

“Yes, of course. Well, why don't we make our way to the lake then? We seem to be angering quite a few people,” said James.

Indeed they were. They were still blocking the Great Hall's entrance.

They headed toward their destination in silence.

Lord, this is awkward, thought Lily.

They walked (and rolled) side-by-side. Someone started to whistle a tune (perhaps to ease the uncomfortable silence.

Finding it difficult to keep up after a while, Lily grew annoyed. It seemed her friends weren't noticing her struggle. Sirius, on her left, raised a hand to fix a stray hair. As his arm came back down to rest at his side once again, it brushed Lily's shoulder. Both looked at one another at the unsuspected contact, and smiled.

“Sorry Evans. My fault.”

“It's okay.”

And once again, it was back to the uncomfortable silence. Finally, the entrance to the school grounds came into view and they all silently thanked Merlin.

Peter and James lead in descending the stairs, and as Lily approached, their changing unpleasantly surprised them.

“Oi, what the hell?” yelled Peter, barely catching himself in time.

“Sorry Peter! The stairs change when I get near. I guess I should have mentioned that,” apologized Lily.

“That might have been a good idea,” said James, rubbing his behind. He hadn't caught himself in time.

Sirius laughed. “That Dumbledore is brilliant. Really thinks of everything.”

With that, he began to push Lily down the slope, and toward the lake. They stopped at a tree by the water's edge.

“Well, here we are Lily, Charlie and Riley, welcome to our tree.”

“Uh, thank you Remus,” replied Charlie.

“Thank you,” said Lily.

Lily looked over to Riley. She hadn't said anything in awhile, but now she had actually been addressed. She was presently glaring at Peter, who was glaring at Charlie, who was shifting nervously from foot to foot. Lily gave Riley a nudge.

“What?”

Riley looked up to see Remus's expectant expression.

“Nice…tree?” said an oblivious Riley.

He smiled, “thanks”

Lily rolled her eyes as Riley went back to glaring at Peter, who was still glaring at the nervous Charlie.

“So,” began Lily as they all seated themselves, “what did you want to talk to us about? Why the sudden invitation after five years?”

Lily knew the answer to the question.

“Well,” said James, “we just thought it would be nice to catch up. Like you said, we haven't really talked all that much in the past.”

Give me a break, thought Lily.

“So this has nothing to do with my present condition?”

“No, no of course not. Unless you wanted to tell us about it.”

“But Potter, hasn't Black told you anything?”

Remus decided to speak up.

“Well, yes, he did. But…the story you told him seems to be a little…”

“A little what?” snapped Riley.

“Unbelievable, unlikely, unrealistic...”

“They get it Sirius. We're just curious about how you came to be…”

“Crippled?” said Lily.

“Well, yes.”

Riley responded for her.

“She told you. It was a car accident. Her wounds were too severe to heal. Simple as that.”

Peter let out an annoyed sound and James gave him a look.

“Well,” continued Remus, “we thought it might have been Voldemort at first, but he wouldn't have left you alive if he'd have come across you or any other muggleborn.”

“Exactly,” agreed Lily.

“But then again,” added Sirius, “there isn't any mortal wound that can't be healed by magic. We've done our research.

“So you think we're lying?” tested Riley.

“Yes,” replied Peter.

Before anyone knew what had happened, Riley had pounced. Now on top of Peter, pinning him down with a wand to his face, it was obvious what she had in mind. The three remaining boys watched on, opened mouthed and somewhat amused. Charlie and Lily weren't as shocked. Riley was always first to lose her temper.

“Why don't you and your friends mind your own damn business? Lily has enough on her mind as it is. She doesn't need four nosey gits breathing down her neck.”

Peter smiled creepily and let out an even creepier laugh.

“I know what happened,” whispered Peter, “It was the claudus curse wasn't it?”

Riley's brow wrinkled in confusion as Peter's smile grew.

“I know the cure, Riley Kit.”

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