Those Words

There are two view points in this story, you and me and then Draco, ~*~*~*~*~*~

Indicates the separation of the different view points.

Those Words

By Felicia

~*~*~*~*~*~

If you were to look out over the open green space that was now covered in moonlight you would just see that, an open green space.

If you were to take a look beyond it and your eyes saw the moonlight dancing along the waters of the lake you wouldn't think anything of it.

The lone solitary tree by the lake looked like it too was sleeping as the rest of the world was.

But if you were to take a closer look you might catch a glimpse of a silvery blond head reflecting the moonlight, before anxious hands would rake through the hair shrouding it for a moment from sight, for the owner of the hair was clothed in black.

Your head might cock in puzzling while trying to figure out why a young man, who looked very out of place among the grass, lake and tree, was sitting there so perplexed.

Maybe he'd received bad news?

What if someone very close to him was in trouble?

It must be horrible enough to make him retreat away so late at night…

~*~*~*~*~*~

`Trapped! No not trapped just caught off guard. This is ridiculous Malfoy get it together. You're the main man ladies man you can handle anything', Draco lifted his head from the hollow of his knees to stare out over the moonlit lake.

He pondered that thought, clenched his eyes shut as though trying to force that thought to dominate all others. He opened his eyes again, `I'm not fooling anyone…'

//Like the sound of silence calling

I hear your voice and suddenly

I'm falling

Lost in a dream//

~*~*~*~*~*~

Draco was hardened from life. He was like a marble sculpture, beautiful but cold and silent.

He'd been trained from a young age that he came from a long line of Malfoy's, full of prestige who wouldn't yield to anyone. He was one of them; he was the line continuing, so he like his predecessors wasn't going to give into emotions and feelings.

“Your enemies can use your feelings against you Draco.” his father had told him when he was young, “You let your guard down and forget to use your head, if they notice that then you're easily manipulated and then you're lost”.

“Yes father” was the reply.

It was almost a parrot-like response, but Lucius' words hadn't been lost.

This is why when Draco was confronted with emotions that he couldn't use to his advantage then he cast them aside, and donned a sneer.

However something different happened tonight. Something troublesome enough to make him run and retreat into solitude.

He couldn't brush off these emotions or, more specifically, the knowledge that he'd caused them.

Draco had caused many emotions, loathing, disgust, jealously, sorrow, pain, and a glimmer of humor over the pain of another, even hate.

Notice how all were negative.

But no person can be that rotten to the core you say. It's true Draco wasn't rotten to the core, he still had some pleasant feelings associated with him.

Admiration, entrancement, pride, and when he was younger there must have been delight, at least on the part of his mother.

There see Draco isn't all bad, he's just lost and complicated.

There's movement down by the tree now, he's gotten up, shoved his hands into his pockets, and now is staring out over the lake.

The thoughts that must be racing through his mind…

~*~*~*~*~*~

`How could she do this? I didn't ask for it, why me? There were others.' Draco bent to pick up a stone as he pitched it out across the water and it skipped his mind continued, `But she didn't, she could have but she didn't, there must have been some reason.'

He couldn't remember the last time something like this had happened, or if it had at all.

`Of course it did you prat, when you were born!'

Even then Draco had his doubts; those emotions were only brought on for those fleeting moments because he was required and needed. Required and needed was a far cry from being wanted.

He sighed; he could picture it happening over again. The moon was hidden behind a cloud, enveloping them in darkness; they'd just been sitting on the wall looking at different stars, when she said those words. He'd looked at her in an emotionless shock trying to register it.

He'd politely inquired “Come again?”

Again those words.

He calmly drew his legs back over from the edge, stood and walked away. He knew he should have said something, a questioning of why it had come to this. What else did she want? But no silence seemed to do fine.

He'd walked calmly away, down the stairs, through corridors, then outside to the lone tree by the lake.

He'd been sitting there for what seemed like hours. Pondering, arguing, denying, hating. He was almost sick with it.

Draco's moods and feelings ran like a river. Constant, flowing, steady. Then with those words it was like all of a sudden along the river someone had thrown in a waterfall and all of it was crashing around in a torrent. He physically could handle it but he didn't want to.

`If I wasn't a gentleman I'd beat that wench for that'

`What if she's just joking, playing me for a fool?'

`How could I leave like that? A Malfoy should always make an exit to remember'

`A kiss…yes a kiss that would have fix everything…maybe not for me but for her at least'

These and more thoughts added to the menagerie of those foreign emotions accumulating in Draco's head.

//Like the echoes of our souls are meeting

Say those words my heart stops beating

I wonder what it means.//

~*~*~*~*~*~

He's moving now. He's like watching an elegant panther almost, black, powerful but graceful. The way he's walking is animalistic too, he paces. Like the poor panther in the zoo, locked behind bars trying to easy its mind from the knowledge that its fate is sealed, there is no way out.

But this young man's cage can't be seen, it's a cage of years of suppressed emotions. Naturally the pacing would come in a frantic way to organize thoughts.

Do you wonder if he, like the panther, has resigned to his fate? Or will he keep resisting and putting off the enviable?

~*~*~*~*~*~

`This is no use, how long have I been out here? I'm getting no where with this, maybe I don't have to, maybe I'll just go back inside go to bed and wake up and act like nothing happened.' Draco thought irrationally.

The rapid stream of Draco's thoughts were very different from the way they usually were, they were coming at all angles, and quickly too. Normally his thought process was organized, calm and efficient. But this wasn't a normal thinking time, there was serious damage done now.

Draco slowed in his pacing to pause to think of a plan of action. `Pretend like nothing happened?! Ha! Like nothing ever happened who am I kidding. If I'd commented sure but I was at a lost for words. A Malfoy not knowing what to say? I never thought I'd live to see that day, not to mention be that Malfoy.' Draco thought ruefully as he sat down and leaned against the tree once more. But then he sobered, the cocky half gin vanished, because again those words echoed, `she'd taken my breath away…'

//What could it be that comes over me?

At times I can't move

At times I can hardly breathe//

~*~*~*~*~*~

Sitting again, wonder if the hard truth hit him.

Have you guessed Draco's dilemma? Or are you still convinced his problem has to do with something of an ill nature? Well maybe an ill nature for him anyways…

~*~*~*~*~*~

Draco sighed, he was starting to give in to what those words would mean. When suddenly a voice of deceitful doubting came and crept over Draco's thoughts.

`She didn't mean it…it's like all the others'

`Yes she must have, I've never known her to lie'

`She said it to hurt you…she knew it would tear you up, don't believe me then why have you been outside now for hours?'

`I've been outside for hours so I could sort out my thoughts to see if she did say it to hurt me'

`Well? I'd say you're hurting'

`Yea you're right I am hurting'

`See! She did do it to hurt you!'

`No she didn't the only pain that has been caused tonight has been self inflicted, at least I hope I didn't hurt her'

With that there seemed to be no reply, he knew she was telling the truth. He knew why he just needed to hear it because he needed reassurances.

Draco got up and left his spot from under the tree, he put his hands back in his pockets and walked into the middle of the field.

There were no lights around to make the stars dim, and tonight was no exception. All of them looked like diamonds scattered, as Draco tilted his head upwards.

Staring up into the blackness, dotted with light he sighed and let himself whisper the words he'd been trying to deny for that whole time.

“She loves me”

//When you say you love me

The world goes still

So still inside

And when you say you love me

For moment there's no one else alive//

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Part 2

~*~*~*~*~*~

Did you hear that? It's a first. A true confession of the heart. The way he made a grand presentation of it, it must have been the first time he's ever admitted something like that. He's leaving now.

Maybe he's going inside to find the person who claims to love him. Then he'll take her in his arms and passionately kiss her before saying that he was a fool then burst with his own proclamation of love.

Ha! Fat chance, this is Draco. Excuse the cliché but Draco is the King of Cool, he'd rather jump in the lake then lower and degrade himself to cheap movie style claims of lover.

He's no Romeo.

But no! You're crying out, He has to; it's always like that in fairy tales, the happy stories!

What about this story tricked you into thinking that?

However love can make a person do strange things….

~*~*~*~*~*~

`Don't run what good is it showing up all sweating and out of breath', Draco thought while making his way briskly down the corridors.

`Girls appreciate flowers and other nonsense not sweaty boys running to them, well unless the sweat's from…..' Draco cut his thought of with a cunning smirk.

Yes he really was the embodiment of a stereotypical male teen.

Draco continued with almost a cocky lilt in his step now.

Until it hit him, he'd left her there, no answer, nothing.

What if she thought that he'd been angry, or didn't feel about her the same way!

`Oh God!' Draco thought as he picked up speed, soon his clipped walk was turning into a steady jog, and then eventually giving way to running. This as he predicted paved the way to a sweaty panting boy.

“Stupid *pant* Founders *gasp* making such a *heave* big school!” Draco puffed.

But before he reached his destination he stopped short so there was at least one more corridor he had to walk.

`How could someone so fragile in appearance have such a big effect on me?' he pondered as he caught his breath while leaning his head against the cool glass of the window.

`One look into those big brown doe eyes, looking up at me I'm gone.'

Draco leaned up away from the window and looked at the portrait that looked like it was a mile away.

He started walking really slowly, dragging his feet, like a person who's headed for the executioner's block.

He wasn't in a hurry, if he really wanted to he could make her suffer all night then tell her tomorrow.

`You wish you could do that don't you? you'd try it then come crawling back here in less then ten seconds. Even before all this when you watched her you were entranced with her. Now that you know what's under the beautiful exterior there's no way you can resist.'

“Shut up, I thought you were on my side?” Draco muttered to his thoughts, “oh great she's driven me to madness, I'm talking to myself now”

But it was true, Draco knew it.

It was a fateful day in October. The weather was warmer then usual, so most people were outside. He'd been sitting by his tree by the lake. When he heard it. A laugh like the tinkling of bells, it was pure heartfelt happy to be alive kind of laugh.

Draco had heard many laughs, ones that mocked the pain of others, ones that were forced and trying to make light of a situation.

But not this, this was different.

Draco got up from where he was, but made sure he was still partially hidden by the tree.

He knew he wasn't popular among the other houses other then his own. So just incase it was better to be out of sight.

But it was too late she'd seen him. She'd smiled a smile that seemed to light up her whole face. She then started to walk towards him, leaving her other friends.

Panic came over Draco, she was in another house. He'd had bad memories about girls from other houses. Granger slapping him. Weasly giving him a bad-boogie hex. Instead she'd given a happy enthusiastic greeting.

Draco thought at first that she didn't know who he was but no there was no mistaking it his name was mentioned in the greeting.

Draco had tried to sneer back and say something nasty, but well it was hard to curse an angel like being.

`Angel like being' Draco now thought `she was angelic but there was so much more to her then that'

She'd take time out of her schedule to ask him how his day was going, she would try to draw him out.

At first he'd scorned her demanded why she wanted to care and why did she like him?

Her reply “I've tried to make a good impact on everyone in whatever way I can, and I personally like being asked about how my day is, to share with someone, I'll stop if you think it's bothersome enough for you to call harassment on me”

Had Draco blushed he probably would have. Instead he'd mumbled that it was ok with him and that she was too kind.

Afterwards they'd started to do more and more together, studying, talking, arguing about Quidditch, telling stories about things they'd seen or done.

Draco had never been this open with one person. He'd usually kept everything inside except his outward expressions of hating Harry Potter and muggleborns.

But as time past, Draco found less time to do those things. He was too busy thinking about other ways to make her laugh or to make her get that delightful astounded expression on her face.

His housemates noticed the different. But he hadn't turned into a good guy, he wasn't prancing around doing good deeds, he was still Draco but just not a prick anymore.

Draco was free, or at least he felt free. There was an exhilaration almost like flying a broom, that he'd be cut off from the world and the images that he'd made or had been forced upon himself, with her he was Draco nothing more or less.

He wouldn't say he fancied her, at first there was a bit of lust playing in the mix. But after talking and getting to know her, well he didn't feel right lusting after her.

It was like she was above him in away. Draco sometimes got annoyed with himself for thinking that, but it was true.

//You're the one I've always thought of

I don't know how but I feel sheltered in your love

You're where I belong

And when you're with me

If I close my eyes

There I times I swear feel I like I could fly

For a moment in time//

~*~*~*~*~*~

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Part 3

~*~*~*~*~*~

Funny, one moment he's racing down those halls like death it's self is on his heels, now he leans against a window pane and waits.

But what is he waiting for? Why is he waiting? Nothing's going to happen unless he does something.

He's waiting because he has to do something that's harder then killing something.

He has to humble himself and ask for an apology for storming out on his lady.

Well she will be his lady, hopefully.

I wonder how she'll react to the thought of being his.

The only things Draco ever got attached to would be taken from him by his father.

This is because Lucius understood that if you become attached to something, and you started to care about it then it again was another means to be attacked by enemies.

You might think `poor Draco, his life's awful.'

But only if you compare it to the way you think a child and a young man should be raised. In a loving supportive family.

Draco knew about those happy families. He saw them at Kings Cross Station every year.

You know the ones where the mother would bend down lower and practically scoop up their child, smothering them with frantic kisses. While the father would pat the child's head, or their shoulder. Then they would leave, beaming at each other.

Draco never thought he'd like his parents to act like that. The very thoughts of Narcissa and Lucius doting on him were impossible to comprehend. No he'd take the handshake and the light touch of a mother's hand guiding him away, thank you very much.

It's like that panther at the zoo again. Except this one was born in captivity. Why long for something that you never knew to exist. How could that panther imagine living in the rainforest when all he's ever known was the cage he was in?

How could Draco long for those warm types of stabilities when his were cold and forbidding?

He's closer now he's there, standing in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady.

~*~*~*~*~*~

`Ok just say the password then worry about how you'll find her later' Draco was coaching himself, step by step.

He was always one for plans, plans were a security.

“Oh no,” Draco said in mock sarcasm softly, “damn forgot the password, well guess I have to go back to my room”

“Password?” came the solemn voice from the portrait.

“I just said I forgot it”

“Oh sorry then”

“Oh this is ridiculous!” Draco had hoped that the Fat Lady would have let him in so he it would be another person besides himself to go inside to find her. “Higgledy Pigldy”

The Portrait swung open, Draco closed his eyes, took a deep breath before entering in.

There was a fire still in the fireplace; he took a glance around the Gryffindor Common room.

`Its not so bad, but more cozy then actually tasteful'

He knew from overhearing several loud boys about their attempted escapades that the Girls' dorm was to the right. He made for the stairs before something caught the corner of his eye.

It was a figure lying on the couch, silhouetted by the fire. He could tell it was a girl. But it wasn't till she moved her arm away from her face, that he saw it was her.

She looked like a fallen angel.

He didn't want to wake her but he had no choice, it was now or never.

He knelt down beside her, then gently shook her shoulder

“Ginny”, Draco whispered, “Ginny, please you have to wake up. I have something important to tell you.”

“humm?”

`Oh that voice, even when it was a mumble, I'm getting a flutter in my gut'

`A flutter in my gut!? Where did that come from?'

`oh right it's that voice again'

“Draco?” Ginny sat up, still trying to wake up. But as soon as she looked into his silvery eyes, a rush of what had happened before came back to her.

She bolted to her feet. Hands on hips, eyes blazing but cold at the same time, and her chin thrust upwards towards him in defiance.

Draco knew that pose, he'd seen it on that first time he'd met her. After jibbing at Harry and she'd rushed towards him in defense.

“Leave him alone”

Draco was almost impressed by the Weasel, if it hadn't been for the red hair she could have been a Malfoy at that second.

But now back in the present Draco wasn't impressed, he was more nervous, on the verge of being remotely scared.

“You've got a lot of nerve showing up here now!”

`I'm going to get frostbite any second from this girl, oh yea well two can play at that game!'

“well excuse me….” Draco started back in a tone so sarcastic well there's nothing really to compare it to.

But he stopped himself, he was the one at fault, she had every right to be mad. He'd humiliated her and walked over her offered heart. No he was going to have to be the man.

“Ginny look I…”

But he was cut off again.

“No you see here Draco, I'm not sure about how you feel, and actually at this point I don't think I want to know, but you have to know this, you hurt me. You could have said something; you laughing in my face wouldn't have hurt as much!”

Tears were forming in her eyes now; here she was again baring her soul.

`Oh God don't tell me I did that to her….'

“Ginny please….” Draco tried to begin again.

She shook her head. Draco could tell from the way she bent it down she was trying to compose herself.

She looked up eyes shining from unshed tears.

“Draco at this point I don't know if I love you or hate you” her tone wasn't fierce it was now defeated, “why don't you just go? I've figured it out that the feelings aren't mutual. I want to hate you. You don't know how badly I do but I still love you.”

//Somewhere between

The heavens and earth

Frozen in time

Oh when you say those words//

Draco wasn't sure he could take much more of this, everything painful thing was because of him. He was about the burst, and then she said it again, but in a whisper so soft he thought he imagined it.

“I don't know why but I do love you”

//When you say you love me

The world goes still

So still inside

And when you say you love me

For moment there's no one else alive//

“Ginny, now you listen to me. Its true when you said that you loved me I was shocked. As foreign as this concept sounds, bear with me.

I never expect to hear those words sincerely, ever. Especially by you. I didn't grow up with any displays of affection. I was told that they were a weakness and a waste of time.

So I sealed my fate and accepted it, no one would ever love Draco Malfoy.

And then you show up saying it. I had to evaluate myself and your words to see if firstly you were telling the truth…..”

This is where Ginny had to cut in.

”I'd never lie about something like that, I care….”

He silenced her with his hand.

“I know but I wasn't sure if I was lying to myself about how I felt for you.”

“And how do you…..”

`This is it….ok breathing! Breathing is key! Because fainting because of lack of oxygen isn't cool!'

“Ginny I do love you”

The floodgates were opened, with those words the rest of the water that had been backed up by the dam of all those years of loneliness, rejection, never wanted. It all melted away.

Draco couldn't hold himself back; with one giant step he'd covered the ground between them. He cupped her face so gently compared to all the fierce emotions ripping through him.

“Ginny I'm so sorry for not telling you it back right away I should have. I'm such a fool. I could have ruined everything. I could….” His self bashing speech was cut off by five words.

“Shut up, and kiss me”

`Well you don't have to ask me twice'

Draco poured in so much passion into that kiss; he was surprised that he had it in him at first.

He tasted her lips, like strawberries. Ginny opened her mouth in a moan. Draco couldn't help from moaning either. She was so sweet. He could feel heat radiating off her. Her perfume was making him feel light headed combined with the kiss, it was like fresh spring, not something chokingly strong. She was plastered against him, and that lust that he'd felt before seemed to dull in comparison for the mix of love involved this time.

Ginny kissed him back, it was like she was drowning and he was her life raft.

She'd imagined kissing him for so long. He had a spicy masculine scent that was slowly driving her mad. He felt muscular which only added to her thoughts of `he really has a raw sensual feel'. But her thoughts were cut off, because she was moaning again, causing him to moan. It was a vicious cycle of passion.

Tasting, smelling, feeling, seeing and hearing.

All their senses became one in that moment.

Draco was caught up in a whirlwind. He'd kissed girls before. Of course he had! But even when it was a deep kiss it paled in comparison to this.

There's something different about kissing someone you're connected to emotionally. It's like your souls are merging. It's something that makes you think it was going to last forever.

//And this journey that we're on

How far we've come

And I celebrate every moment

And when you say you love me

That's all you have to say

I'll always feel this way

When you say you love

The world goes still

So still inside

And when you say you love me

In that moment I know why I'm alive

When you say you love me

When you say you love me do you know how I love you? //

~*~*~*~*~*~

I heard a moan…..oh get your mind out of the gutter!

What did I say before this wasn't some cheesy movie love deal?

It is rather a private moment I think it best that we leave. They're good kids. Well Ginny is anyways. Draco isn't a around good guy, but he's better then he was. I think tonight will be the start of a great and drastic improvement.

Ah, young love. And even though the line would normally be “too bad it won't last”

I have a feeling that this will, for years and years.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The End

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Shudder Authors note….

If you were upset that it was like “omg we know who it is!!!” I wrote this story for fanfiction.net where anything is possible so it was clever of me… well I thought anyways.

For people who complain about Ginny's eye colour. Show me where it says blue and I will correct myself. For now it is brown because it's my story. But also to the review that complimented my poetry. Oh wow thank you, I stink at poetry. I talk too much to be a poet, but yay!

To my reviewers while I wrote this story, Cheers. Hugs all around! and lollipops for all!

Righty oh. I will wait for answers and reviews to see if I should keep writing or give up forever.

later

~ Felicia

P.S. the song is from Josh Groban. The best singer in a really long time!

“After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.”

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