The Hardest Things (tentative title)

FieryStar90

Rating: PG13
Genres: Drama, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 6
Published: 23/03/2005
Last Updated: 10/04/2005
Status: in_progress

Formerly titled "The Walls of My LIfe: Like Shattering Glass." Harry's ideal, perfect, post-war life falls apart and he's convinced that happiness is just not in the cards for him. Can he be convinced otherwise? A story of redemption, love, and rising above life's many trials, featuring Villain!Ginny, Supportive/Pre-HBP!Hermione, and GoodGuy!Ron

Chapters

1. 01: Some Homecoming

1. 01: Some Homecoming

Disclaimer: If Harry Potter were mine, do you really think I would have Harry end up with Ginny? Please. You insult my intelligence.

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01: Some Homecoming

“To the bride and groom,” he finished, trying to look jovial as he avoided her eyes.

“To the bride and groom,” the rest of the room echoed with him. Clapping and cheering followed, and Harry managed his first genuine smile as he gave Ron a hug and pat on the back. Luna beamed up at her husband to be and Harry felt guilty at his mood during one of the most important events of his best friend's life.

Gazing around the room, Harry tried to squelch his horrible mood by conjuring up positive thoughts. Why should he be so unhappy? Here he was, aged twenty-two, still alive, when five years ago he thought he wouldn't live to see his next birthday. Both of his friends were alive and well; that much was evident by Ron's bright smile and Hermione's pleased expression. So many worse things could have happened to him. He shouldn't dwell on it.

But catching her eyes across the room diminished Harry's good thoughts immediately and as he saw her attempt to approach him, his body acted instinctively when he turned on his heel and walked in the opposite direction.

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Hermione found him away from the festivities inside the Burrow and outside near the water they used to play in as children. Standing on the bank, she could feel the cold and pain radiating off of him as he gazed up at the stars. Doing what she did best, Hermione stepped up to him and put a hand on his arm.

She said nothing, waited as he acknowledged her with a sad smile. “Can't get past you, can I Hermione?”

“No,” she said quietly, “you can't. What's wrong, Harry?”

Jamming his hands into his pockets, Harry's gaze drifted back up to the stars. “I found out some… some terrible news last week.”

“Last week?” Hermione frowned, wondering what it was that he hadn't bothered to tell her or Ron about it already.

“I didn't want to ruin Ron's party,” he said, catching her thoughts. “I was going to wait to tell you both after the wedding, but I've never been very good at hiding anything, have I? Just look at my attempts to learn occulmency.”

“Harry,” Hermione said softly, cutting off his ramblings. “Just tell me. You know I won't judge you.”

She was startled to hear her friend give a bitter chuckle. “Oh believe me, Hermione,” he told her, “it won't be me who you'll be judging.”

Her eyes sharpened, and she said tentatively, “Ginny?”

Thinking of his ex-girlfriend, Harry's eyes turned dark. “Yes. Ginny. It's all very simple, really. She cheated on me.”

“What?” Of all the things for Ginny to do, that was quite possibly the most unimaginable. After years of worshipping and adoring Harry, after claiming that it had always been him, how could she be with another man?

“I know,” he gave another cold chuckle. “But it's true. She did. And I doubt I ever would have found out too, except for one little detail…”

“Ginny?” He had just returned home from a long Quidditch tour. Right now all he needed was three things; a hot shower, a nice meal, and his girlfriend. The latter was his top priority at the moment, and he couldn't wait to see her. Three months without her had really been too long.

“Is… is that you, Harry?” Immediately, Harry sensed something was wrong. Her voice was tinged with an odd tone and as she descended from the upstairs, her eyes were anxious and guilty.

Narrowing his own green eyes, Harry frowned at her. “What's wrong, Ginny?”

“Nothing, I…” Her eyes darted around frantically before landing on him again. The words “I'm two months pregnant” came out in a rush.

But Harry didn't rejoice because he was already doing the math in his head and he has been gone for three months, not two, so he already knows—

“It isn't mine.”

Her head bowed, he could still see her lips mouth “Yes.”

Harry's mind raced for a minute, trying to keep calm and wondering if he wanted to know more. In a very Hermione moment, his curiosity got the better of him. “With who?”

She flinched, but answered the question. “Draco Malfoy.”

His voice, calm and flat, didn't betray his rage. “How many times?”

“Just once,” she whispered. “Just once.” Her breath hitched, she saw her opportunity. “It wasn't planned, Harry! It just happened! I was out with some friends and we had too much to drink and he was there and—”

“Stop.” Harry's breathing was audible now, tense and very controlled and labored. His back was turned, as if he couldn't bear to look at her. “I don't want—I don't want to hear anymore.”

“What do you want me to do, Harry?” Breathed Ginny, her voice laced with hysteria and regret. “I'm sorry! I love you, I didn't want this to happen. I'll get rid of the baby, I'll do anything!”

Harry felt sick at her suggestion. “That's between you and the child's father,” he said quietly. “And the only thing I want for you to do now is to get out.”

“Wh—what?”

“I said, `get out'. I can't look at you right now without wanting to break something and I doubt I can control my magic any longer, so if you know what's good for you, get out.”

He heard her quickly gather a few things and appearate and only then did he let his magic loose, as pictures, tables, and just about anything glass, shattered.

By the end of his story, Harry barely registered two warm arms wrap around him and hug him, as if trying to squeeze the pain out of him. Looking down, he saw Hermione, whose wet cheeks matched his. “I'm so sorry she did this to you,” she told him. “I'm so sorry that you have to go through this pain.”

Harry's arms wrapped around Hermione and he squeezed her as well. He knew that she was hurting because he was and hated that once Ron found out, both of his friends would be in pain.

As she felt Harry's tears trail down from his face and into her hair, Hermione Granger's mind kicked into high gear, planning what she was going to do the next day. And at the top of the list was a visit to one Draco Malfoy.

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Comments: After abandoning this story for over a year, I suddenly had the urge to go back and finish it…. and then I re-read it. The first draft that I posted here really, really, really, really sucked and so I am in the process of editing. I have two other stories at different sites, so updates will be far and in between, but one day this story will be finished.

So hopefully this will be better. Until next time!

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