I Always Will

Menucha

Rating: PG
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 15/04/2005
Last Updated: 15/04/2005
Status: completed

After the war, Harry gets the chance to live an unburdened life. A trip to a Muggle amusement park uncovers both a fear of Hermione's and, possibly, a revelation. One-shot.

Chapters

1. I Always Will

1. I Always Will

This story was originally posted a year ago on fanfiction.net under the same title, as my first ever piece of fanfiction. I unearthed it and did some major character revisions, and this is the result. Shameless fluff still. You'll need an awfully high sugar tolerance. Please review, and I hope you enjoy.

I am thrilled at the reaction that "On Toward Morning" has received, and, not to worry, Chapter 8 will come soon.

Author's Note: This story is told from Harry's and Hermione's first-person points of view. It starts with Harry's and alternates at each break.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Everything belongs to J.K. Rowling. I am not making money from this. Please don't sue me.

It was summer. The sun was shining. It was a perfect day.

Just two months prior, it had all ended. I'd killed him. And she'd been right there. Ron had been also. But now, we were all about living. Especially me. This was my first chance to live, no threats over my head, and I'd be damned if I let the short remainder of my teenage years slip by me. I'd spent the hours doing things that people half my age did, things that I'd never gotten to enjoy before, after several weeks of coaxing, prodding, and downright forcing by Ron and Hermione. They let me live.

So I ran barefoot. I watched Muggle movies and played jokes on wizarding children with the pranks from Fred and George's shop. I went swimming in lakes just for the sake of it. And today was my birthday.

She had come from her flat, just three down from mine, at a quarter to seven. Even after graduation, she tended toward being an early riser. She'd presented me with a ticket to a Muggle amusement park, a place I'd never been. Five wonderful hours and two cotton candies later, I paused in front of something I'd always wanted to do.

"Let's go on the Ferris wheel," I said, grinning.

"Uh, I.... I'm not sure, I... no," She looked down, and fidgeted. She had just botched a sentence for one of the first times in her seventeen years of existence.

I looked at her.

"Hold on. You mean to tell me that you, little Miss Gryffindor, is afraid of heights?"

She looked at me, a glint of fire in her eyes.

"Yes," she said calmly. "I can't bear heights. You knew that. I hate flying. I don't ride on brooms, and I hated riding Buckbeak. The only charm that I couldn't ever do was a levitation charm, not because I couldn't, but because I refused to. You're welcome to go on. Have a good time!"

"Come on, Hermione. It's only a ferris wheel. It's not going to hurt you."

He is so blind. I don't think it's going to hurt me. I'm just terrified of it! I can't explain it, but I know there is no way I'm going on it. It's an irrational, completely unfounded, but entirely terrible fear.

"Hermione. It's a ferris wheel. It goes up really slowly, and down really slowly."

"Thank you. I really needed the definition. I know it's a ferris wheel! I'm just... I just... I can't explain it." I hated this.

"Look at me."

I looked at him. I saw Harry Potter.

"How many times have we been in a situation far worse than just a little ferris wheel? And how many times have you died?"

I bit back a laugh. It was wonderful how he could laugh at it now. They say laughter is the best medicine, and he was finally letting it all go. He could joke about it. And I loved that.

"I wouldn't tell you to do anything that would hurt you. I won't let anything happen to you," he said, seriousness back in his voice.

Where did that come from? I mean, I know where it came from. I had totally innocent motives. I won't let anything hurt her, including a big bad ferris wheel. I'd protected her, and she'd protected me, in far worse situations and far more times than I'd like to recall. But when I said that, I felt different. Not like protective-brother Harry. I don't know how it made me feel. It was just different. But I had time to think about how I felt later, now I wanted to go on the ferris wheel. My sugar-induced haze made me resort to underhanded tactics.

"Pweeeese?"

At that moment, I looked at him. It should have been really funny, he was trying his sad-puppy face, which is really funny-looking. But it wasn't. I really looked at him. At his eyes. His green eyes. I saw something that I'd never seen before. I don't know what it is that I saw. I just know that it made me feel different. Something about his eyes, and how he told me that he wouldn't let anything happen to me. I'm not sure what I felt. But something possessed me to look at my best friend and say

"Fine. I'll go."

What the heck did I do that for?!? I'm terrified of heights! I can't do this!

"Great! And Hermione, there's nothing to be afraid of."

Yeah right. Nothing. Like heights. And falling. And... I would have thought of many more, had Harry not poked my arm and said

"Here we are."

Oh, great. I looked up at the gigantic metal structure. I wondered briefly about the capability of such a structure to maintain its integrity under the forces of gravity.

"Harry. I... don't know if I can do this..."

"Hermione, it'll be fine. Come on. It'll be fun!"

I looked at the wheel again, which had come to a stop with a cabin right in front of us. I'm a Gryffindor, I thought to myself. I'm brave. And if I die, I won't die like a fool. I've taken on evil wizards and curses that can break your soul in a millisecond. I'll do this... for Harry. I took in a shaky breath.

"Okay."

The ride operator opened the little door, and I looked inside. There was only a seat and a pole in the middle. No restraints. I couldn't do this. I was trembling. But it was too late. Harry had already taken my hand to lead me into the cabin. Hold on, Harry just took my hand. I felt soothed slightly. Like I was safe, like he was going to protect me. It's not like it he hadn't taken my hand before. But why did it feel so different now? I had no time to think, though, because the more important thing was that I was being led into the cabin of a ferris wheel. The cabin swayed, and I started trembling again. I sat down quickly, and took a death grip on the bar in the center of the cabin.

Sweet Merlin. This girl really was terrified. I could feel her shaking when I took her hand to lead her onto the ferris wheel. But something happened when I took her hand. She became a little bit more relaxed. She didn't stop shaking, it just let up a little. And her hand felt a little bit warm. And so did mine. With her hand in mine, all of the sudden I felt the need to protect her. To keep her safe. It felt so different. Hermione is independent. I've never thought I needed to protect her before. I'd done it, but it hadn't been because she needed it. It was because I couldn't bear to lose her. It was a new feeling. But even though I wasn't quite sure what my feeling meant, I knew that I was going to protect her on the ferris wheel. As weird as it sounded. We'd been through far worse, and she was never like this. The challenges for the Sorcerer's Stone. The horrors during second year. The Triwizard Tournament. The Department of Mysteries. And that last battle. I don't know why she felt this way now, but I knew I was going to help her. She stepped shakily into the cabin, sat down, and gripped the center bar. Even in the few seconds, her knuckles turned white. I stepped in and sat down next to her, and watched her eyes as the cabin swayed under our weight.

"Harry!!! It's swaying!!! We're tilted!!! Why are we tilted?!!"

I looked at her. Now I knew she was afraid. Her logic had gone out the window.

"You aren't going to fall. The cabin is tilted because the weight is uneven. I'm on this side and you're on that side, and I have a feeling I weigh more than you."

After all, I was nearly a head taller than her, and I was more muscular, thanks to Quidditch. But as I said it, I felt myself looking at her. She looked almost fragile. She was gracefully slim, but not the little girl she used to be. Her legs, now in shorts, were long and trim. She had gotten slight curves in all the right places. The thought made me slightly warm, and even more protective. Hold on!!! What?!?! What has gotten into me! This is Hermione. She's my best friend. She's not a girl! I'd never seen her like this before. But my reverie and confusion had to be cut short. I heard her voice.

"Well then fix it!!!! I don't like being tilted!"

My voice was cracking. I felt so stupid that I hadn't thought of that. No wonder we were tilted, he did weigh more than me. I guess the muscles were what did it. He was lean, but he was showing some definition... wait! This is Harry! What has gotten into me? I realize that both of our romantic endeavors were put on hold for the duration of the worst part of the war, but this feeling...

I forced my mind back to logic, a much more normal territory. If he was so smart to figure out why we were tilted, then why did he not think about how to fix it? For someone so smart, he can be so clueless. I was ripped from my silent reprimands, though, because I felt the cabin begin to move under me. I tightened my fingers around the pole.

"Harry. We just started moving. And we are still tilted!!!"

I felt the cabin start to rise. I looked over at Hermione, who was staring at me, desperation in her voice.

Somehow I guess that I forgot to "fix" our tilt. As gently as I could, to avoid making the cabin move any more than it already was, I slid over toward the center of the cabin. She sat still, white-knuckled, and stared. We still swayed as the cabin really started to move.

"Hermione, if you want it to stop swaying, you have to move toward the middle of the seat. Come slide over."

She looked at me like I was crazy.

"You want me to move? I... I don't think I can!"

"You can. Come here. It will stop tilting if you slide over. But you're gonna have to loosen your grip on the bar there."

There was a look of terror in her eyes. She gazed over the side of the cabin. We were still rising, but we were nearing the top. Looking back at me, she quickly slid around the seat until she collided into me at the center.

"Good. Now, Hermione, relax! This is fun! Just relax a little."

We rose over the crest of the wheel.

"Come on. Take your hands off the bar. You can't fall."

She trembled a little, but when she looked back at me some of the terror was gone from her brown eyes. She relaxed a little against me and her hands loosened on the bar. We were going down, now at the bottom of the rotation again. Looking again into her eyes, I reached over and took her hands off the bar to hold them in my own. I don't know what on earth made me do that, and I don't know why, I just know that when I did, as weird as it seemed, it just felt right.

As we rounded back up after the first rotation, I felt a little more relaxed. I let my hands loosen their grip on the bar. I allowed my body to relax, just a little. I sat there right next to Harry, close enough for him to make me feel safe. Just then I looked over at him. He looked into my eyes, and again I saw those green ones. He took my hands off the bar and held them. In that moment, I felt safe. I was secure, everything was right. I wasn't sure why. He always made me feel safe, but this time it was different. The way he looked at me. The way I felt. I don't understand where these feelings were coming from, or what they meant. But somehow, it felt different than the other times. He didn't feel like my big brother this time. As weird as it seemed, it just felt right. We neared the top again. I felt it. I was just starting to admit that this ride wasn't so bad, when I heard a loud grinding. The ride shook, and the cabin screeched to a halt. My body immediately tensed, and I sat bolt upright.

"Excuse us, ladies and gentlemen. There has just been a minor electrical problem. The ride will begin running again when the problem is fixed. This shouldn't take more than 20 minutes. Thank you for your patience."

I've never been one to curse. I believe that cursing is unnecessary and vulgar.

Damn it all to hell.

As soon as the ride stopped moving, I looked over at Hermione. She was incredibly tense, and the ride operator's monologue didn't help much. She glanced quickly over the side of the cabin, and saw that we were at the top of the wheel. The terror crept back into her voice as she spoke.

"Harry... what are they going to do? We're stuck, at least a couple hundred feet in the air, in a little tiny cabin that wobbles, and we're up really high, and..."

I couldn't understand the rest as her eyes welled up with tears and she broke into sobs. "It's ok, Hermione. Nothing is going to happen to us." I did the only thing I could think of. I pulled her closer to me. As I hugged her, and felt her warmth and her sobs, I reassured her. I felt her heartbeat.

"Nothing is going to happen. I'll keep you safe, Mione."

As I sat there holding her, everything felt right. I was going to keep her safe. I didn't know how, but I knew I was going to.

She welcomed my embrace and pulled me closer to her, and her sobs became more distant. Eventually, she stopped crying. She slowly sat back up and turned to face me. "Thank you. I know this is kind of an irrational fear, with you having been chased around by Death Eaters and me being afraid of a stupid ferris wheel. I'm sorry."

"Mione. There's nothing to be sorry about. I like protecting you."

That statement affected me somehow. First of all, he called me Mione. Nobody ever calls me anything but my full name, but it felt right when he called me Mione. It made me feel special. And he likes protecting me. After all we'd been through. He still had patience for me. My heart was crying with joy. But still, something im my brain felt odd. This was Harry Potter. My best friend. My brother. My guardian. I couldn't think of Harry Potter as anything else. He just wasn't. He couldn't be. Not within rational thought.

"Harry, you've always protected me. Thank you."

I looked back at him. Into his eyes. His green eyes. I felt them bore into my own.

"Mione, I always will."

At that point, I think that all rational thought went out the window.

I couldn't really hear myself think. I thought I heard my voice say that, but it had sounded so far away. I was looking into her deep brown eyes, and quickly losing any logic that I had. This was Hermione Granger. My best friend. Who I was alone with, in a cabin high above the ground, staring into her eyes, into her soul. I was no longer thinking. I was running on adrenaline and instinct. My stomach tightened in a way I'd never felt before. Without breaking eye contact, I slowly leaned in towards her.

I had no idea what I was doing, or why. All I knew was that I had butterflies in my stomach, and I was tingling all over. I leaned slightly toward Harry, and saw him close his eyes. I closed mine and tilted my head to the side. After what seemed like an eternity, I felt his lips on mine. I was seventeen years old, and it faintly registered that this was my fist kiss. I was suddenly warm and tingly, and sparks seemed to be flying from my lips. Unknowingly, I reached my hands behind his neck to pull him closer.

Our lips touched. I felt an electric shock going through my entire body. At that moment, everything was perfect. I put my hands on her small waist. I thought I felt the earth move. Actually, I did. The wheel started to move. Jerked back to reality, I pulled away. I couldn't believe it. I didn't just do that. I couldn't meet her eyes.

"Bloody Hell. Hermione. I didn't... I mean... how did... I don't want to ruin our friendship... I just... I..."

"Harry."

It was more of a sigh than a name. What did she mean? What was she going to do to me?

"Harry. It's ok. I don't want to ruin our friendship either. But you know, I believe that everything happens for a reason. That wasn't for nothing." A smile broke the corners of her mouth.

A short distance away, two teenagers stood underneath Harry's invisibility cloak. One held a strange pair of binoculars and looked at the ferris wheel, and the other held a wand. The one with the binoculars spoke first.

"Good work, George. I'm exceptionally proud. At least one of us was listening in Flitwick's class. Nice Destroyment Charm. What exactly did you break, though? I don't even know what an electrical problem is!"

"To be honest, Fred, I have no idea. I just aimed and fired when you told me to. Just be glad that I also remembered the Reparo Charm."

"I am glad. And I can think of two other people who would thank you for your Charms skills. If they don't kill us first. You have to admit, this was my best master plan yet."

"It was. You'd better have recorded what you saw on the Omnioculars. I want to see that our evil plan was not in vain."

"Trust me, George, it wasn't. Worked like a charm."

-fin