Pink Poison and Violet Venom

Jersey Princess

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 4
Published: 08/06/2005
Last Updated: 07/09/2005
Status: completed

No spoilers! In a battle of wits, eight girls arrange a competition--the freedom to ask out the Marauder of their choice if they win, with no loopholes and no opposition. It’s a girl on girl fight, and the boys are completely oblivious. LJ MP XR KS Features a nice Peter and lots of ridiculous events.

Chapters

1. Creation of a Competition

2. Day 1

3. Day 2

4. Day 3

5. Day 4

6. Party!

1. Creation of a Competition

Edited: changed where Xylia is from—she's now from Finland (even though Xylia is a Greek name...her father is Greek and her mother is Finnish).

This story has been REVAMPED.

Don't ask. It hasn't even be posted, and already it's been rewritten. I just got the best idea after I watched Sleepover (I like that film! I rented it on Friday 3rd! XD). How about rather than the boys fancy the girls, in traditional fics, the girls fancy the boys, and the boys have no idea that the girls exist? It would be very true to reality.

And very humorous. I'm now doing humour. Or, rather, my sense of humour, which, I have been told, is rather skewed. Oh well.

But yes, the two teams of girls are fighting for attention from the boys…it's a fluffy predictable fic, and I really hope you enjoy the happenings in it!

Oh yeah, and Peter is thoroughly nice in this one. Fit, smart, and brave—plus blond. Every girl's dream (not mine, though! I prefer black haired, hazel-eyed/green-eyed guys…-cough- actually, I don't mean Harry, but James is there…XD). No meanness here…

Summary: Darlene's group fell in love with the Marauders the first time they saw them. Lily's group had also fallen hard. In a battle of wits, they arrange a competition…the freedom to ask out the Marauder of their choice if they win, with no loopholes and no opposition. It's a girl-on-girl fight, and the boys are completely oblivious. LJ (MP, KS & XR, too…)

Disclaimer: Okay, let's see. I'm not making any money, I'm not opposing the copyright infringement laws or anything, I'm not claiming any of these characters to be mine…actually, I am: Darlene, Regina, Scarlett, Honey, Xylia, Kairi and Meiying are mine, so far. The plot belongs to me, with a little bit of thanks to the writers of Sleepover for inspiring me. This is not completely like the film, but it gave me an idea…

Year: Sixth Year

Mode: Alternate Universe (AU)

Story: Pink Poison and Violet Venom

Author: Cazzy (yours truly, Jersey Princess)

Dedicated to: Dixie/Dee (Dip Yu, my e-pal) for inspiring the Chinese character of this fic, Mei. Thanks, girl! XD

I hope you enjoy this!

R/R

---

Chapter 1, Creation of a Competition

Hey sweeties, meet us at the Entrance Hall at 8. We wanna run something by ya. Darlene xxx

Lily grimaced at the message. Darlene always went too far. Oh well. She was a bitch anyway; it was to be expected.

“Girls, the Darlings have graced us with a message. Dare we reply?”

“What does it say?” Mei replied, ever the curious one. Lily told her. “Oh, well yes then.”

Lily grinned and replied with,

Darling Darlene! Actually, your name means darling, doesn't it? Oh well, yes, of course we'll meet up with you. See you! Lily

Lily Evans, Kairi Majola, Xylia Jasper and Zhu Meiying were best friends. They were what were known by most of the school as either the `Venomous Ones' or, by the Princess's group, `Violet Venom' (or the `Flowers', by a few random people in the school).

But that was only because the Flowers had dubbed them with the nickname `Pink Poison' for the ridiculous amount of pink they wore and the fact they were rather sickly to be around.

Pink Poison (or the Darlings, as they were generally known) consisted of Darlene Underwood, Scarlett Beacon, Regina Phillips and Honey Grant, all perfectly tanned and British pureblooded Gryffindors.

The two groups were as different as could be—in VV, there was one Brit (muggleborn), one Finn (halfblood), one Chinese girl (also muggleborn) and one African (pureblood). In PP, there were two blondes, a brunette and a raven-haired girl.

But they had one connection. They both idolised the Marauders—James Potter, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin.

The Marauders were tall, handsome, bright, funny, reckless, and downright adorable. Every girl they'd ever gone out with wanted them again. Because of them, every girl in the entire school wanted to be the one they kissed, they trusted, they loved. And in several cases, girls went out of their way to stalk the boys, and offer to do things for them just so they would get a `hi' from the boys the next time they saw the girl.

The boys knew PP, but they had no idea who VV were (though they'd heard of them). The girls were too down the popularity ladder…in fact, they may even have not been on it. They were pretty enough, but classified as geeks for the fact they were the best in all their classes and had never had boyfriends. Not that they cared—they were happy with who they were.

Kairi, Mei, Lia and Lily all got ready for their evening out with the Darlings—in their traditional purple, of course. They always wore purple because it was funny to actually match their nickname on purpose, not be named because of it.

They slipped out of the Gryffindor Common Room at 7:50 and hurried down to the Entrance Hall. When they got there, they were ambushed by the Darlings, all in matching fuchsia pink tube tops and baby pink miniskirts with dark pink heels.

Darlene strode up to Lily and smiled angelically at her. “We know about your pathetic crushes on our boys, and we have a deal to make with you.”

Lily was almost glad that it was Darlene who spoke, because it was well-known that she was the brightest of the Darlings. Scarlett's IQ was slightly lower, Regina's was lower again, and Honey…dearest Honey…

“You slut! You're trying to steal my Sirius from me! I hate you! I'll hurt you so bad you'll be crying to your mummy! You stupid black boyfriend-stealer!” Honey launched herself at Kairi, who was looking rather amused (Kairi automatically stepped aside when she saw the other girl ready herself).

That was about the extent of all the words Honey knew.

Darlene grabbed the back of Honey's top and used it to reel the girl back in. (“Honey, we need the girl alive, not dead, sweetheart.”) Unfortunately, the top slipped…luckily there were only girls around…

Honey growled haughtily and replaced the top, muttering about unfairness (to Lily's amazement—the girl knew more words!) and Sirius.

“Well, sweeties,” Darlene continued. The girl insisted on calling them that, because she knew it made them annoyed. “As I was saying, we have something to run by you. We've thought up a competition. You have to get as close to the boys as you can in a week. You also have to get a few items of theirs whilst you're at it. The team who gets down here first on Saturday next week at 8 gets the freedom of knowing that they can ask the boys out without the other team interfering. Losers never even look at the boys again. Crystal?”

Kairi laughed and replied with, “You're on. Now, what's this list of items we have to get?”

“Okay. A piece of Sirius's food, a pair of James's glasses, the white king from one of Peter's marble Wizard's Chess sets, a lock of Remus's hair, and a pair of each of their underpants.”

Kairi choked with laughter. “Sirius doesn't eat some of his food? James has more than one pair of glasses? And their boxers? Oh my God!”

“James has three pairs of glasses,” Lily replied automatically. “But I'm not sure that Sirius ever leaves anything on his plate.”

“Do you still feel up to it, sweeties?” Darlene asked in that irritatingly sweet voice of hers.

“You bet we are!” Kairi said. With that, the girls walked off to write down what they had to do. This was not going to be easy, as the Marauders had never heard of any of them.

---

The Flowers had decided that each of them should get to know the person they fancied and also get the items of theirs. This meant Kairi was with Sirius, Mei was with Peter, Lia had Remus, and Lily had James. For all of them this seemed a dreadfully hard feat, as everywhere they looked the Darlings were talking to the Marauders, trying to flirt and make them like them. It looked like it was working, until later on the first day, Lily heard James tell Sirius that Darlene was driving him crazy.

So it seemed that the Darlings weren't as good as they thought.

---

What did you think of that? I think I'll go a day at a time. Most of the things will be found near the beginning of the week, except for James's glasses…that should be rather funny, how they get them…

Anyway, I really hope you like this. It should flow rather fast…eight or nine chapters at most.

ly,

Cazzy xxx

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2. Day 1

Thanks:

Emma Dobbs, Caity, Mary, HAZY DAYZ, phillygal, hazeleyedmarauder, Magical Poof, HHR227.

I hope you enjoy this just as much as the last one. As I said, most of the things but James's glasses are found in the first three days of the week. Oh, and James's boxers. I'm going to borrow the idea from Sleepover—the way that Julie gets Steve's boxers…

I've just read the reviews of Sleepover on a website, and they're so rude! Apparently, it's boring for over-12s, and shouldn't be watched by over-14s. WELL, I'M GOING TO BE 16 THIS YEAR! And I like it. Hmph!

I really hope you enjoy this! Please read and review!

---

Chapter 2, Day 1

Mei was sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room, her short straight black hair swinging loosely around her shoulders and her brown almond-shaped eyes looking at her nails, to see how much damage there was to them—she liked chewing them. She looked up and saw Peter in front of a marble Wizard's Chess set. He was alone, and so Mei got up and walked over slowly.

“Hey,” she said softly. The boy looked up and his gaze met hers.

“Hello, can I help?” he asked.

“Oh, I was just wondering if you wanted a chess match?” Mei asked, indicating the chess set. “I'm Meiying, but my friends call me Mei.”

Peter smiled and said pleasantly, “Of course! That would be great. I'm Peter. I don't believe we've met? What year are you in?”

“Sixth,” Mei said with a soft smile. She sat in the chair opposite Peter and immediately noticed that the side she'd be playing with was white. If she didn't manage to beat Peter, at least she could quickly take her king…

They played quite well together—they were matched quite evenly. But eventually Mei managed to just beat Peter.

The boy stared at his place and said softly, “You…beat me? I've never been beaten before.”

Mei laughed. “I don't remember the last time I played with such an amazing chess player. You're incredibly good.”

“Not as good as you, though,” Peter replied ruefully. “Hey, do you want to have another game sometime? Here again, tomorrow?”

Mei smiled. “It can't hurt, so sure!” She smiled warmly and bid her goodbyes, and then went up to the Gryffindor girls' dorms, tightly clutching the white king in her hand the whole time.

---

Lily, being the bright one, had decided that she wasn't going to follow James wherever he went (like Darlene was), but casually talk to him when they were in the Common Room.

She wasn't planning on bumping into him. Literally.

She'd picked up her things from the table in the library where she'd been doing her work. She turned around and started walking towards the exit, not watching where she was going. She hit something hard and fell to the floor, dropping all her books and scattering her papers in a circle around her. She hurriedly began picking things up, tucking her hip-length bloodred curls behind her ears and surveying the area with emerald eyes the shape of Mei's. Suddenly, another hand went into her vision, and began picking up some of the things she couldn't reach.

Lily looked up and said, “Thanks, and sorry,” before she fully registered who it was.

James Potter was helping her. Lily Evans, a lowly unpopular Sixth Year, to his magnificent popular self.

The boy smiled kindly at her and said, “No problem. Here are your things. Actually, do you want me to carry some of this? And are you going back to the Common Room? We'll walk you there.”

Lily noticed that there was Sirius standing there next to him. He'd also picked up some of her things, and was cradling them in one arm whilst eating a biscuit with the other. She smiled gratefully and said, “Thanks, that would be great.”

The boys walked beside her, and asked her a few things like, “What year are you in?” Lily was glad of the company, and rushed up to her dorm with a wide smile on her face when they got back, hurriedly excusing herself. She dumped her things beside her bed and collapsed on it, smiling broadly.

Downstairs James was staring at where Lily had been moments before. “Who was that?” he asked softly.

“Um…I dunno. I remember her from something…I think we have Transfiguration with her or something. Let's ask Moony. He should know.”

---

Remus was working at a table in the library behind a stack of books. He was writing a lengthy report on the views of a potion that was able to change the colour of people's skin (it wasn't like he could remember the name of it, but he'd recognise it if he read it) to green.

Just as he was about to write a piece on the after-effects of the potion, a girl with long straight golden blonde hair that reached her elbows and blue eyes hurried around the corner and whispered to him, “Is there anywhere here that I can hide? There's a crazy Darling following me.”

Remus chuckled at the description, knowing that the only people she could be talking about were either Darlene, Honey, Scarlett or Regina. “Er,” he began thoughtfully. “Why is she after you?”

The blonde shrugged. “She started spouting crap that I was going to steal her boyfriend, not that she has a boyfriend…she sounded like Honey when she's after Sirius and trying to kill Kairi at the same time.”

Remus chuckled. “Hide under this.” He threw the girl the invisibility cloak, which he'd brought with him in case he needed to stay in the library after dark.

“It's a cloak. She'll notice someone hiding under a cloak.”

Remus laughed. “Just wear it. Trust me.”

The blonde yanked it over her head quickly and stood against the stacks.

A girl with short black corkscrew curls walked around the corner, and Remus winced, recognising Scarlett. The girl never ceased to be after him, it seemed.

“Remy!” the short and annoying girl cooed. “Have you seen a blonde girl in the past few minutes? She took something of mine, and I'd really like it back.”

Remus shook his head, and then he widened his eyes, as if he'd just remembered something. “Oh, you mean the cute girl who looked like a goddess? Yeah, she passed here. She went that way. She moved very fast.” He pointed in the opposite direction to where the girl really was.

Scarlett smiled widely. “Xylia! I'm coming to get you!” She turned and rushed in the direction Remus had pointed, calling, “Thanks, Remy!” over her shoulder as she went.

The moment she'd vanished, Xylia threw the cloak off. “What happened there?” she asked softly.

“Oh, that's an invisibility cloak. It's James's. I just thought you'd want to hide from her—I know I did.”

Lia shook her head. “That's not what I meant. I mean, you helped me. And you don't even know me. We're in the same year, the same House, the same classes, and you've never had any idea I even existed. Like Sirius has no idea who Kairi is, and James has no idea who Lily is, and Peter has no idea who Mei is. So why help me? What's the point?” She turned to walk away, when Remus reached out and grabbed her hand.

“Wait, Lia!” he said, using her nickname forcefully, to let her know he'd heard it before. “I have heard of you. You're one of the Violets, aren't you?”

Lia chuckled. “The Flowers, actually.”

Remus shrugged. “Violet Venom, isn't it? The only opponents of Pink Poison, or the Darlings as you seem to call them. Isn't that right?”

Lia nodded. “We named them that coz they are so sickly and bitchy! And pink.” She shuddered. “I mean, all of us but for Lily look good in pink—she's a redhead—, but still, we'd never be excessive about it.”

Remus laughed. “You wear a lot of purple, though.”

Lia beamed. “Ah, but of course. We're Violet Venom, therefore we must try to make ourselves seem as true to our name as possible.”

“Well, us Marauders are very proud of you. We only wish it was us who'd come up with such a nickname for the Darlings. Disgusting, foul creatures they are.”

Lia was suddenly struck with an idea. She wasn't banned from telling the boys about the contest. Remus seemed like a sensible person, and he should find it amusing…if told in the right way, Sirius and James (and probably Peter) would find it funny, too. So she told Remus about the competition.

The moment Lia told Remus about the things that she needed from him, he laughed loudly (only to be growled at by Madame Pince). Then he took out his wand and pointed it at his head, muttering a spell that allowed parts of his hair to come off. He handed them to Lia. “I hope that suits. As for the boxers…well, those Darlings are incredibly stalkerish. Let's see about putting a spell on the dorm door to stop them coming through if they try to take them. I quite fancy the idea of watching all your friends coming in, though…it should be funny to watch. Please don't tell your friends about the fact I know, eh? I'm certainly not going to tell mine. It'll be funnier that way. I'll tell them later.”

“Can I spend the rest of the week with you at times, please? Just to make it look like I'm getting to know you? And I think it'd be funnier if we just switched the signs about so that the Sixth Year Dorm was labelled Fifth Year…then the Darlings would have to steal someone else's boxers. But put the spell on as well.”

Remus nodded in reply and picked up his things. “Do you want to go back to the Common Room now?” He offered his arm and Lia hooked hers through it, laughing all the while.

---

They arrived back at the CR and were immediately pounced on by James and Sirius.

“Moony! Do you know a redheaded girl in our year? Do you know what she's called?”

Lia spoke up. “Oh, that's my friend Lily! Why did you want to know?”

James shrugged, looking away in the distance. “Lily…” he breathed softly. “Suits her perfectly…”

Sirius laughed and replied for his friend, “The girl accidentally bumped into him earlier and he's been dazed ever since.”

Lia smiled at the messy-haired boy who was still looking out into nothing and mouthing her best friend's name, and said, “Just so you know, if a Chinese girl ever comes near you, it's Mei, so don't ignore her, and if an African girl ever talks to you, Sirius, it's Kairi. Talk to her. Anyway, I must dash. Bye, and thanks, Remus!” She waved to the three of them and scurried up to her room, where she laughed aloud at the sight of both Lily and Mei staring at the ceiling dreamily.

Lia saw Mei had put a white chess king on her dressing table. She hurried over and picked it up and put it in a pouch with the hair. Then she charmed it so that only one of the four of them could get into it (so the other team couldn't steal anything of theirs, even though the Darlings didn't share the same dorm as them).

---

Downstairs, Remus was staring where Lia had gone. Sirius looked worried, wondering why both of the boys had gone mad.

“Why are you looking like that, Moony?” he asked. “I mean, sure, she's pretty…”

“She's not just pretty, she's a goddess. And she's nice in her head, too…she has a great personality. You two'd like her, actually.”

“Is she your girlfriend?” Sirius asked, knowingly. Remus shook his head hurriedly, knowing it couldn't possibly be true. After all, she couldn't like him. She probably had a boyfriend of her own…

Just then, Lia rushed down the stairs and grabbed Remus's shirt. “Boxers!” she said. “Are you forgetful?”

Remus popped back into reality, and he took Lia's hand and pulled her up the stairs quickly, to the other two boys' amusement.

“Wonder what they're gonna get up to there, eh…so much for not going out…” Sirius said suggestively.

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” said a tall black girl with waist-length black ringlets clipped back in a barrette and dark brown eyes. “They wouldn't be doing anything.”

Sirius watched this girl with one eyebrow raised, and then he realised that this girl must be Kairi—the African.

Remembering Lia's request, he smiled and said, “What makes you say that?”

“Well, Lia's too sensible to do anything, and anyway, I'm pretty sure they're not dating. I think they only met an hour ago.”

Just then, a girl flew through the open portrait and flung herself at Kairi, yelling, “YOU STOLE MY SIRIUS FROM ME!”

The ditzy blonde broke off after she said that to turn to Sirius and say, “Hi Siri, babe,” before she turned back and slapped Kairi across the face.

Sirius did the only thing he could think of. He may have been a little stupid, but he was not dumb, and not about to have girls fighting over him. He grabbed Kairi and pulled her close to him, so close that her nose was pressed into his chest. “Stay away from her, please!” he told Honey quickly and desperately, to try and stop her from attacking Kairi even as he held her. “Don't ever try and hurt Kairi again! It's not her fault she's a friend of mine. So move!”

Honey growled at Kairi, but she turned and walked off haughtily (and obediently).

At that moment, Lia came hurrying down the stairs, waving a pair of brown and white striped boxers. “I'VE GOT THEM, KAI!” she yelled as she ran. She leapt down the final few steps, rushed over, grabbed Kairi's hand, and pulled her out of Sirius's grasp and up the stairs after her, leaving Sirius staring rather bewilderedly after the two.

“What an amazing bunch,” he said softly. “Well, mate, we finally met the Flowers…”

---

I hope that satisfied your munchies…

ly all,

Cazzy xxx

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3. Day 2

Thanks:

unlucky-duck/Emily, Sunset Blvd, phillygal, Kiley, Anonymous, Shadow Heartthorn, britishbabe, ruby riddle, Anonymous, Divya, Mary, alan22, Emma Dobbs, hazeleyedmarauder, Caity

Disclaimer: Hello. Did you not read the `dis' in `disclaim'?

R/R

---

Chapter 3, Day 2

“Walk with me.”

Lily looked up into the hazel eyes of one handsome Marauder. She sighed. “Fine.”

The two of them walked slowly down to the Great Hall where they were going to have their breakfast. Day 2 of the competition between the Darlings and the Flowers had dawned, and already they had a white marble chess king, a lock of hair, and some rather horrid style of boxers that only Lia could ever like. Obviously she'd chosen them. They smelt of boy and all three other girls had insisted Lia keep them as far away from them as possible. The girl had crossed the line of being possessive, and had started hugging the boxers as if they were a teddy bear. Lily made a mental note to talk to Remus later—perhaps he'd ask Lia out. Chats about his hair and his admirable features were much more welcome than how his boxers smelt…

Anyway, James was currently scuffing his feet on the floor.

Forgetting that she was walking with a famous Marauder, Lily snapped, “Will you quit that infernal noise?”

James stopped walking suddenly, and Lily crashed into the back of him.

“Did you just…yell at me?” he asked softly.

“Sorry,” Lily said, equally quietly.

“No, it's good. People seem to walk on eggshells around me. It's interesting to see the shells cut people's feet. It's better than being a porcelain doll everyone thinks is pretty, or something…do you know how irritating it is that nobody's yelled at me since my mum passed away? It's just…thank you.”

Lily looked rather confused at this. He was happy that she was yelling at him? Weird, weird boy…then she realised what he'd said before that. “What happened to her?”

“My father was murdered by Voldemort, and she couldn't take it. She just died peacefully in her sleep,” the boy replied softly. There was a tell-tale glint in his eye, and Lily tried to think of some way to comfort him. Eventually she decided to give him a hug.

After the hug (Lily had never thought she'd be touching a Marauder intimately as he cried on her shoulder…well, as intimate as they could be with all their clothes on and their lips as far away from each other's as possible), they continued walking into the hall and sat down with their friends, who were all sitting together—Sirius with Kairi on one side and Lia on the other, who had Remus next to her. Opposite them were Mei and Peter.

The eight had a peaceful lunch where they spent the time chatting, much to the Darlings' jealousy.

---

The Darlings were, as mentioned before, very jealous. They wanted the boys all to themselves, and didn't wish for the Flowers to get in their way.

Regina had spent half the time throwing a fit because her Peter wasn't noticing her. Scarlett was having the same problem with Remus—he was more intrigued by Lia than her. This infuriated her to no end. And Honey was stressing out over the fact that Sirius wouldn't give her any affection. Finally, Darlene had a thought—Polyjuice Potion. If they couldn't get the boys fairly…well, the quote was `if at first you don't succeed, try again and then cheat'…

---

Sirius was munching on a biscuit when Honey rounded the corner and took it out of his hand, walking off innocently in the opposite direction to him.

Sirius frowned, but pulled another biscuit out of his pocket. Minutes later, Kairi came from the other direction and plucked the biscuit out of his grasp. She was walking in the same direction as him, but she sped up so he couldn't catch up to her.

Sirius was irritated, but he absently pulled another biscuit out of his pocket and pretended to eat it.

A few seconds later, a tiny brunette rounded the corner. She'd watched the other two girls walk away with Sirius's food, and so she decided to try and get some herself.

Unfortunately for her, Sirius grabbed her quickly when she tried to take his food and muttered in her ear, “I wouldn't wriggle if I were you.” He smiled at her and said, almost conversationally, “So, why were you three after my food??”

---

Mei grinned at Peter as she proceeded to beat him again at his own game. “This is fun, isn't it?” She laughed. “I'm sorry for beating you again!”

“Let's make this interesting,” Peter said thoughtfully. “Let's say that the next person to lose has to ask out someone of the other person's choice.”

Mei shook her head. “Nah, that's boring. Let's play Truth or Dare at the same time.”

“Loser has to wear the other's underwear for a day.”

Mei's jaw dropped open. “Eww!! But that's disgusting!”

Peter shrugged. “It's what the guys would do.”

“But…you're not your icky friends! C'mon, that's so revolting! And I'm not going a day without my bra if I lose…”

Peter winced, but stuck out his hand. Mei took it, and the game began.

---

Lily spent the entire day cradling the bag to her chest. The Bag of Goodies, as they called it, now contained a sparkly marble chess king, a few strands of sandy-brown hair, a crumbling chocolate biscuit and a pair of hideous boxers that they'd banned Lia from ever going near again. There were still four items to get, and they all had to become friends with their crush.

Looked fun.

---

Kai looked around her. There was nobody there; good. She rushed over to the stairs and quickly climbed them. She saw the sign saying `Sixth Year Dorms' and looked inside the room, only to find it very tidy; not at all the way the boys usually kept their room. She knew something was up, so she went over to the door with `Fifth Year' above it. She pushed open the door to find Remus lying on his bed, reading a Witch Weekly magazine, to Kai's amusement.

“I'm trying to understand girls,” he explained without even looking at the door. He pointed to a messy bed. “They'll be over there.”

“What do you know?” Kai asked in confusion.

Remus shrugged. “Lots of things. I know that you actually wear glasses, for one matter; they're just charmed to be invisible. I also know that Mei is so stubborn that even though she hates short hair she'll keep it short because you keep reminding her. And I know that you are trying to get all of us guys to like you, rather than letting us fall to the hands of the Darlings. Am I good?”

“Lia?”

“Lia.”

Kai smiled. She opened Sirius's underwear drawer and poked her way through the contents. “Thanks Remy. So, Siri wears boxers with purple bunnies on them, hmm?? Jeez, that kid needs to grow up…” She picked up the boxers, waved to Remus, and left, after being told by Remus,

“Don't switch the signs back. Lia and I thought it would be funny if the Darlings stole Renny's boxers.” Renny was thoroughly irritating fifteen-year-old who liked stalking the Darlings. He didn't like them, but he loved stalking them. It was his hobby, and the girls hated it. By stealing his boxers, they were giving him free permission to stalk them again.

And also, the boy was paranoid; he had cameras up in his room. It should be amusing to see his reactions.

Oh yeah, the Flowers still had it.

---

Scarlett dropped the boxers on the table. “Since when did Remus care about flowers?? His boxers have pink flowers all over them. I mean, pink and flowers! That's just wrong! We're not even connected! And Remus shouldn't be insinuating anything, he should be getting off with me!”

Darlene rolled her eyes. “Scarlett, you're a stupid little girl. Grow up and learn that this is much bigger than boxers. Besides, I have a plan. If the boys decide that they like the brats more than us, we'll call a tie-breaker. And we will win it. Here's what we'll do…”

---

I really hope you enjoyed that, and I'm so sorry it's taken so long!! I'm so bad…well, I ran out of ideas, so I rented the film again! I've now got the idea for the tie-breaker; first person to guess wins…something!! Clue: it involves dancing.

ly all,

x Kirstie x

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4. Day 3

Thanks:

Anonymous, bobo7891, Miss Amazonia, ByTheCandleLight, FloatingBubbles, hazeleyedmarauder, anonymous, lillyfan16, Ana, Shadow Heartthorn, PrettyPadfoot, Missrs, demetra, Remus`sweetie, a muggle named Caity, anonymous, britishbabe, unlucky-duck

As for the competition, my friend Kay is the only one who really knows, though Ana was very close!

Disclaimers are disclaimers, which means disclaiming something and therefore saying it is not yours. But as it is, I actually own most of this story. But you all know which parts are not mine, so you're not going to get worried, right? The entire scene when Lily gets James's boxers is doctored from the film. It's not completely from it; I changed some of it and write some stuff in, so you don't have to worry. But from then on it's mine.

Please R/R

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Chapter 4, Day 3

Mei wriggled uncomfortably. She'd told her friends why she was wriggling, but only they and Peter knew.

For beneath her school skirt, Zhu Meiying was wearing a pair of green boxers.

As Peter had refused her request to wear a bra, she magicked herself some support and sighed in relief.

Kai, Lily and Lia had been delighted when Mei told them about the bet and Mei's weird loss. They'd told her to keep the boxers and add them to the collection, and so she agreed. Peter had enough boxers; he didn't need these.

And so, still wriggling, Mei left the room and headed down to the Potions Lab. Hell Day had just begun.

---

Darlene smiled warmly at the teacher and went into the Potions cabinet to get her ingredients for green-skin potion they were making after they'd handed in their essays on it. Professor Slughorn was delighted with all the detail in every essay in the class, especially Remus's.

As she entered the cabinet, she made sure nobody was looking and slipped a jug of Polyjuice Potion into her Pink Princess satchel. Then she went back to her seat innocently and continued with the potion.

---

It being Friday, the Darlings knew that their enemies only had the following day up til 8pm to get the remaining items, if they had any. The Darlings themselves didn't, though Darlene was slightly suspicious about the boxers; Renny was watching them more hawk-eyed than ever. In fact, she wouldn't have put it past Violet Venom to have switched the signs pointing to the dorms. She went up and had a look in the room labelled `Sixth Year'. Remus was lying on his bed, reading a magazine.

Obviously it was the right room, then.

The moment Darlene left, Remus climbed off the bed, left the room, and went to visit the Fifth Years, who were in the real Sixth Year dorm. “Thanks for that, Renny. We really need to get those Darlings off our backs. How do you think we should do that, then?”

---

Scarlett crept into the Flowers' room at the same time that Darlene was in the wrong one. She was going through the girls' hairbrushes to get hairs from each of them. Polyjuice Potion—you couldn't turn into someone without the hairs…

---

“Hey, Peter!” The boy turned to meet a tall girl with wavy brown hair that reached her shoulder-blades and dark brown eyes.

“Hi Regina,” Peter said with a sigh. “What can I do for you?”

“Oh, I just wanted to let you know that there's a dance-type thing on Sunday. Couples. It's not a ball, but it's going to have a dance contest and so on. You might want to choose your partner soon; she might get another date!” With that, the girl flounced off. Peter knew that Regina wanted him to ask her, and he also knew who he was going to ask…not her!

He turned and headed back to the Common Room, ready to tell the other Marauders and the girls what he'd just found out…and laugh at Mei (after telling her she looked great in his boxers).

---

Lily decided that if she was going to get James's boxers, she'd better get them soon. She hurried up the stairs and into the right boys' dormitory. As she entered, she saw Remus there. He smiled at her and waved her over to James's bed, which was nearest the bathroom. All the girls had finally been told that Remus knew, so Lily wasn't worried. She walked over and just as she was opening James's underwear drawer, James walked in the room. He was facing Remus, and so he luckily didn't see Lily as she crept into the bathroom and from then on into the shower, which was in a bath and protected from view by a curtain.

Outside, James headed towards the bathroom. “Don't go in there,” Remus said quickly.

“Why not?”

“The…the shower has a leak!”

James sighed, and told his friend that he was not afraid of the water. He went in and locked the door. To Lily's fright, he started undressing in front of her—facing her.

Lily choked as she watched him tug off his shirt, and then kick off his shoes and unbuckle his trousers. She knew she shouldn't be watching, but she just couldn't move her glance. He pulled off his socks, pulled his trousers down and stepped out of them, revealing boxers with Qaffles flying across them. He moved over to the shower and put his hand in behind the curtain and turned the shower on, which promptly soaked Lily. Then he moved back and yanked off his embarrassing Quaffle boxers (Lily would have to remember to use that for blackmail at some point).

Lily, who'd squeaked from getting wet, squeaked again at the sight of something she'd never thought she'd see. She turned away, embarrassed, and waited for the boy to pull back the curtains, find her, and hate her forever.

He never did.

There was a loud crash down the stairs. James grabbed a towel, wrapped it around his waist, and left the room. Lily stepped out of the shower and grabbed James's boxers. She left the room, and saw James go out onto the landing. Remus looked at her and tried to stop his laughter from coming. He mouthed, “Use the broom!” and pointed at James's bed. Lily grabbed the broom, climbed onto the windowsill, and dropped out, sitting on the broom. She pulled up quickly and flew around to her room.

James turned around. “What happened?” Remus shrugged.

“Sirius went down there yelling! I have no idea where he's gone!” Truthfully, Sirius had done it to create a distraction to help Lily, and was currently chatting to Kai downstairs out of James's view as he looked for the boy.

James shrugged. “I'll go back to having my shower.” He walked over to the door, looked in, and said, “Hey! Where did my boxers go?”

---

What do you think? Sorry it's taken so long!

ly,

x Kirstie x

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5. Day 4

Thanks:

Anonymous, EvenSong, Zoey, ByTheCandleLight, britishbabe, hazeleyedmarauder, blue flame878, PrettyPadfoot, bluetomatopasta, and a muggle named Caity

Chapter 5 everyone! Please R/R, and ya know I don't own anything non-recognisable. My duty here is to thoroughly amuse you all!

This is going to be quite short, as nothing really of any importance happens today. The last chapter should be the next one.

---

Chapter 5, Day 4

Violet Venom spent most of the day counting their objects. Mei had told Peter about the competition and the fact she'd give his boxers back when they'd finished, and he'd laughed and agreed that if it stopped the Darlings talking to them, he'd be fine with it.

As it was, only Lily had anything left, but James had spent the whole day in his dorm (which was a very rare occurrence, but he was hoping the thief who'd stolen his boxers would come back) and so she couldn't get in there to raid his drawers.

Finally, it was ten to eight and Lily was getting frantic. James was still up in his bedroom, and she was going to go up there if he didn't show soon. Remus, who'd noticed Lily's discomfort, called, “James! Get down here now!”

The boy hurried down the stairs, and as soon as he reached Remus, Lily walked over to James and plucked his glasses off his nose (scraping his ears as she did so). She then grabbed the other girls' arms and pulled them all out of the Common Room before James realised.

James stared behind them…or what direction he assumed they'd gone in. “What was that for, Moony?” Remus explained to him the competition. “Oh, so that's where my boxers went! But why wasn't I informed?”

Remus shrugged. “I don't know, but we were all told.”

James sighed. “Maybe she didn't like me enough to tell me?” he asked softly.

“Let's go and see, shall we?” Remus asked with a mischievous look on his face. “Grab the Cloak and some glasses and we'll all go down and see if our girls win.”

---

The Darlings lay their items out on a table that Scarlett had conjured up. They had every item they were supposed to get…it seemed.

The Flowers also lay their items out, next to their enemies'. They also had everything.

“Hey! They're not my boxers!” Sirius hissed from the Marauders' hiding place behind a particularly grotesque statue of a naked man on a horse's back.

“They're not mine, either,” Remus hissed back. “Lia and I switched the signs; they're the Fifth Years'.”

“Oh, so that's why Renny's been stalking them!” Peter sighed with a laugh. “Fantastic idea, Moony.”

“Oh, It was Lia's idea,” he said modestly. “She's the Queen of the pranks.”

James shushed them and pointed to where the Darlings were talking.

“Since we both got all the items, we should do a tie-breaker,” Regina said. It was the most articulate sentence any of the eight had ever heard her say (with the exception of the sentence about the dance). It seemed that she wasn't as dumb as they all thought. Neither was Scarlett, because of the transfiguration of the table.

Kai nodded. “Yeah. What do you think we should do?”

Honey spoke up. “Well, my Sirius would have no—!” She was caught off guard by Scarlett's hand clamping over her mouth, even though she kept talking.

Scarlett told them over Honey's incoherent mumblings, “We decided that the Dance would be a good thing.”

Darlene continued with, “Basically, you have to get your Marauder to ask you to the Dance. That will show us who've got to know them more, and who the Marauders like more. The Dance is tomorrow evening. You have all of tomorrow morning and afternoon to get them to ask you. Everything's allowed.”

“Everything?” Lia asked, a little speculatively. “Even cheating?”

Darlene looked a little put out at this. “Anything that gets you a date. Think body parts and enlargement charms.”

Mei chuckled. “You mean, basically we could give ourselves three tits and they might ask us? Yeah, yeah. Fun.”

Scarlett shrugged. “You heard the girl. Now scram!”

The Flowers grabbed all their stuff and walked off, leaving the Darlings whispering inconspicuously about their ideas for cheating and getting the boys' attention.

The Marauders, hiding behind the statue, made an unspoken agreement that they wouldn't ask the Flowers unless they knew it was the Flowers, and they definitely weren't going to ask the Darlings.

---

Sorry for the length, but like I said—nothing really happened! And tomorrow is it, guys! The last chapter!! Hope you've all enjoyed it as much as I have! - coughs105reviewsonffnetcough -

Well, I have an announcement to make. My darling ff net reviewers won't get this for a while, because some hilariously funny human being has decided to change my email password, and my email has now been disabled, which means that I can't update my fics on ff net! CRAP! I'm so mad!

But anyway, love ya,

x Kirstie x

(aka x THE HYPER ONE x)

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6. Party!

Thanks:

Anonymous, Anonymous, angelzgirl15, Kelly, ByTheCandleLight, phillygal, stranger, Mary, bluetomatopasta, Emerald, britishbabe, dificult, a muggle named Caity, bobo7891

This is IT, folks!! I hope you've had as much fun as I have!!

Disclaimer: I own all crazy situations, the plot, Renny, and all the girls but Lily.

R/R/E!

---

Chapter 6, Party!

“So you know what to do? You drink the cup with the girl's hair in it, you smile at the boys and get them to ask you. Crystal?”

The girls nodded at Darlene's words and Regina reached for her cup, whilst Scarlett hurriedly grabbed the cup next to Regina's.

Honey downed hers and yelled. “I'm blind!” she yelled. “This girl is absolutely blind! Everything is fuzzy!”

“Honey, sweetheart, it must just be the effects,” Darlene said. She drank hers, and her vision was perfectly clear. “On second thoughts, maybe the girl has a sight impairment.” She waved her wand and Honey's eyes cleared. She rested them on her other two friends.

“Hey, Scarlett,” she said to the girl who looked like Lia.

“I'm Regina,” the girl replied.

“But you don't like Remus,” Honey said in confusion.

“No, I like Peter; that's why I look like Mei,” Regina told her friend as if she were talking to a stupid person.

Darlene rolled her eyes as she noticed. “Trust you two to get it wrong.”

Scarlett turned to Regina to see what the problem was, and screamed. “You look like Lia!”

Regina replied in a similar fashion with, “And you look like Mei! Oh no! We must have drunk the wrong cups by mistake; they were both a brownish colour!”

Darlene sighed. “We only have an hour, so we'd better not dawdle. Regina, you'd better hope that Peter liked Xylia, and the same to you but for Mei and Remus!”

The four of them hurried out and off to find their boys.

---

Honey hurried along the corridor when she spotted Sirius. “Hello, Sirius!” she said cheerfully. “So, have you chosen who you're going to ask out tonight?”

Sirius smiled back at the girl. “Actually, I have.” He looked at her nose in confusion. “Hey, you have something on your nose. I'll get it off for you.” He reached out and touched the bridge. Just as he suspected; no glasses. This wasn't Kairi.

“There,” he said. “Well, I'll see you later, okay?” He turned and hurried away to find the real Kairi, leaving Honey behind, irritated.

As he was heading further down the corridor, he heard a hiss from behind a statue. He turned to find an identical girl to the other one, by this time with gold framed glasses perched on her nose. “What an irritating girl!” Kai said with a grin. “Hey Siz.” She smiled cheerfully and mimicked Honey. “So, have you chosen who you're going to ask out tonight?”

Sirius nodded. “My lady,” he teased, “d'you wanna come with me?”

Kai smiled widely. “I'd be delighted to, good sir!”

And so she hugged Sirius and skipped up the stairs to the CR to get ready, wondering why Honey hadn't thought to lock her away so that nobody found her.

---

Scarlett bounced up to Remus, who took one look at her and told her, “Scarlett, go and harass Peter. He might think you're actually Meiying.”

Scarlett sniffed and muttered something about killing Regina, and then, to Remus's surprise, she said, “I know you like her more than me. And…and I guess I can see why. She doesn't try and steal someone else from the person they're perfect with. Remus, I wish you happiness.” She leant up, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and walked away from Remus without even trying to make him ask her.

Lia walked up moments later. “What was that about?” she asked, curious.

“That was Scarlett; I think she accidentally turned into you. But she's stopped following me. She said she wouldn't again. And this gives me the chance to do this,” Remus said to Lia. “Lia, will you come to the dance with me tonight?”

Lia nodded happily. “I will! Of course I will!” Mentally she started singing the praises of Scarlett, who'd turned out to be not so bad after all.

---

As for poor Regina, Peter had already asked Mei by the time she found him in the library (she'd answered in the affirmative and he'd kissed her in delight, leaving them in a make-out session). They were still kissing when she went in, so she walked off again and left them to it.

---

Kai entered the CR to find Lily and James deep in conversation. James looked up as she came in.

“Why are you so happy? Sirius ask you out?” James asked, teasing.

Kai nodded. “He asked me to come to the dance with him! I'm so happy.”

Lily, who was really Darlene, seethed. One person had actually got their date to ask them out…and that meant Honey hadn't been asked…poor girl.

Kai hurried towards the left staircase and Darlene remembered something. “You can't go to the dorm!” she said hurriedly.

“Why not?”

“Because…all…because our dresses are in there and I don't want anyone to see them!”

Kai rolled her eyes. “We only have an hour to get ready and if I don't start now, then I won't be ready in time.” With that, she left a nervy Darlene behind and climbed to the top of the stairs as fast as she could. She opened the door as she reached their dorm, or tried to. Behind the door she could hear a thumping noise, so she whispered, “Alohomora!” and the door unlocked. She opened it to find Lily against the wall beside the door, gagged and bound. She freed Lily speedily and hurried back to the stairs, where she yelled, “James! Lily wants you up here!! She was gagged and bound and I don't know why!” She looked down the stairs to see that the Polyjuice Potion was wearing off Darlene and that she was turning back to herself. “Hello Darlene,” she said.

James turned and stared at Darlene in horror. Then he turned to the stairs and started running up them three at a time, ignoring the wailing. He grabbed hold of the railings when the stairs turned to a ramp and used it to help him up despite the stairs' frantic attempt at pushing him down. He reached the top, dodged Kai, helped Lily up, and then smiled gently.

“Hey,” Lily said.

“Hey,” James replied. “What are you doing tonight?”

Lily shrugged.

“Wanna come to the disco with me?”

Lily nodded. “Sure!”

At that moment, the other two girls appeared and all of them pushed James out of the door and proceeded to get ready for that night; they only had forty-seven minutes left and counting.

---

Although Regina and Scarlett had given in, Honey and Darlene were still as desperate as ever. They decided that they would not let the Flowers win this one. Pink Poison were going to beat Violet Venom at all costs.

---

The Flowers, dressed in their violet skirts and trousers and white tops, entered the disco to the sound of heavy music thumping. The boys each asked them to dance, and they did.

The Darlings, watching them, knew they had to act soon. Renny watched them plan something and whispered a plan in Remus's ear as the boy passed to get some drinks for the girls. Remus nodded and told the others when they went back.

“I'd like to make an announcement!” Darlene yelled as she walked onstage. Everyone quieted, all wanting to hear what the blonde had to say. “This past week, my friends and I have been in a bet with who you know as Violet Venom. We betted that the girls couldn't get to know the boys within a week. As it is, they have managed it, but alas, I'm sorry that you have to find out this way that they never liked you for you; they just wanted popularity.”

The boys feigned hurt looks and looked away from the girls angrily. Sirius, glaring, said, “How could you do that to me?”

Kairi, also acting, stood up and yelled, “You know that we wanted popularity! It's all we ever wanted! Nobody noticed us!”

Lily chimed in. “We just wanted our week of fame. All the unpopular girls would see that, because we'd got to go out with the infamous Marauders, that we were cool. Everybody would love us.”

“Yeah, and we fell for it!” Peter yelled. “You're nothing but a bunch of selfish bitches and I hope I never have to see you again!”

Darlene raised her eyebrows at the Flowers. “I guess we win the bet. The boys obviously don't like you, and we were winning anyway. You were never going to; you never had a chance.”

Remus nodded slightly at Renny to tell him it was time. The boy hurried in, yelling, “Has anyone seen my boxers?”

Everyone stopped and stared at this Fifth Year Gryffindor who was brave enough to mention his underwear in front of the whole school.

“Some have been taken from my room. There are some that my sister gave me with pink flowers on them, and some with black and white stripes, and some with blue hearts on them, and some with a snow display.”

Scarlett, who was not as stupid as we think, noticed the looks between Remus and Renny and realised what was going on. “Oh, I know where they are!” she piped up cheerfully. Regina nodded her head and agreed.

“Scarlett got the pink flowers and I got the hearts,” she said cheerfully. “Honey got the stripes and Darlene got the snowflakes ones. They're in our dorm.”

Darlene stared at the two girls angrily. “What are you two doing?”

Scarlett looked up, defiantly. “What we've realised these past two weeks is that we'll never be able to fill the places of Meiying and Xylia in Peter and Remus's hearts. They deserve the places much more than us, because we hang around with you. We're popular and evil, and we really shouldn't be. I'd prefer to hang out with the Flowers any day.”

“Me too,” Regina finished. “Goodbye, Darlene. I hope we can still be friends, but only if you stop being mean.”

And with that, the two girls walked away from Darlene, each linking an arm with Renny and taking him out of the hall.

The Flowers stared at each other, screamed in delight, and kissed their date in absolute synchrony.

Yeah, the Flowers really had it.

---

Twenty-odd years later, eight girls strutted down the corridor; four heading for four.

“Hey girlies, we've got a bet that we think you'll like,” said a brunette in one group.

“Hit it,” said a black-haired girl from the other group. “Anyway, we'll beat you. We always do.”

“Not this time, Angels. Just coz your twin brother is one of the most popular boys in school, it doesn't mean everyone loves you,” a girl with auburn hair said from the opposing team.

A blonde in the black-haired girl's team replied with, “Okay, so tell us what we gotta do, Devils. We'll be ready for whatever you throw at us.”

---

That's it!! But don't worry, I think I'll do a sequel with those girls at the end. Kudos to the person who works out who the black-haired girl is, what her name is, and who her mother is!! (Hint: look at one of my one-shots.)

I really hope you enjoyed that and do say if you want a sequel…That could just be a simple ending; it doesn't have to follow anything…

ly, for the last time in this story,

x Cazzy x

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