He understood

Shinteo

Rating: G
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 6
Published: 04/08/2005
Last Updated: 04/08/2005
Status: completed

Another take on the Wedding. Nothing to do with my previous fic. Hermione's thoughts during Harry's wedding to another person...

Chapters

1. untitled

1. untitled

Title: He understood

A/N: The Wedding again… another take on the same theme. No relation with my last fic.

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

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They’ve been waiting for this day for a long time now. I’m the only one that’s dreading it. The Weasleys, the crowd, indeed the entire Wizarding World had been waiting for this day for a long time now. The Wedding of the Century. The Wedding of Harry James Potter. They’ve been expecting it, whispering about it everywhere I go. The air is charged with excitement.

I’m the only one that’s not affected by the atmosphere.

I kept my eyes down, staring at my butterbeer. Hiding within the crowd whenever I saw someone that I recognized.

They would never understand. He never understood. The nights spent at his place, just talking the night away. The times we spent together. Oh, so much time spent together. Sure, most of the time Ron was there too, but still… I thought he had understood…

He never did.

*****

The night he proposed was the night my heart broke. We were at the party that was thrown for us, in honor of finally destroying Voldemort. When the whole world was wild with excitement and relief. We were battered and injured, but had recovered enough to be present at the party at Hogwarts. He proposed then, kneeing at the Great Hall in front of everyone and proposed. She had shouted “Yes!” and jumped into his arms and the crowd cheered, but I was the only one silent.

Oh I smiled after that, of course. The perfect couple finally having their prefect wedding. I hid my grief behind a smiling face. Everyone was so happy about the news, I just can’t spoil it with my own petty feelings. I smiled while my heart broke.

My true emotions were not shown, hidden under the mask of happiness. Hidden so well that no one caught on to it. I acted happy that my best friend, the man I loved, was about to marry another woman, and forgot about me…

*****

He came to me that night, as I was trying to hide from the party. I had gone to a balcony to the side of the Great Hall to try and find some private place where I can think and sort out my feelings. And have a good cry without anyone noticing. But he found me before I could start.

He told me he had doubts, that he wasn’t sure if he did the right thing, that I was the only one he could ask. His eyes were shining, but something was hidden within. I smiled and patted him on the back and told him to do as his heart says. He nodded and was gone and I was finally free to cry.

I cried for those days that were behind us now, never to return. And I wondered at the times we spent together. Did they mean anything to him? Or was I just used as a source of comfort? He and I are more alike then he realized. We hide behind masks, not allowing anyone to see what’s inside of us. Not even his wife-to-be knew the hurt child that’s hidden in him. He needed someone who can see through him, to see that child, what he’s really hiding from everyone, and to understand. Someone like me. But he never understood that…

*****

We stood before the altar in the church, Harry as groom, me as the bride’s maid. And my heart is breaking again, as I heard him utter the words I dread the most on this day. “I do.” With two words, he placed part of his life behind him for good. The part that I was in. I had tried forgetting him, but it’s impossible. We had spent half of our lives together, and I had loved him for the better part of it.

I looked up then, seeing the tears of joy that was flowing down the bride’s eyes, as she too spoke the words that would seal the bond between them as husband and wife. “I do.” My heart seemed to have disappeared completely, and I can’t breath and everything was spinning around. Then I caught Harry’s glance, and there was something in there that made me paused. Perhaps he understood how much it hurts after all, but there is nothing I can do about it now…. Or is there?

“If anyone objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace” The words ring in my ears. I waited for someone, anyone to speak up. Even Malfoy would be welcome at this time. But no one did. Did they not see that Harry did not want to be here?

“I object.” The words slip out of my mouth before I could stop them. They came out so fast that I had to say it again. The murmuring started, as everyone looked at me, surprise and confusion on their faces. Why would anyone stop this wedding, they seemed to ask. They would never understand.

It doesn’t matter though. Harry understood. His eyes were filled with relief, and he smiled at me when I said those words. The world might never understand, but Harry did. That’s all that matters to me. That’s all I wanted.