Like Rippled Forkstits and Quivell Suponats

Like Rippled Forkstits and Quivell Suponats

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter; it belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling, who horribly sunk our ship.

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Sometimes I wonder why people call me Loony Luna Lovegood. But then I wonder why people even address each other by name. Who invented names? Then I wonder how names could be hurtful or rude. I mean, what if Loony Lovegood was my name? Then, would the others use it to mock me? I think not. They'd have to think of something else.

A lot of my questions can be answered in the Quibbler; I don't think many people realize how much helpful information is in Daddy's magazine. In fact, I doubt anyone really knows about the Two-Headed Pinnymph. It's very fascinating, actually. Did you know that they actually make their own food, like a plant?

Of course, thinking of plants makes me think of Neville Longbottom, who I have found, is quite fond of plants. You know, the peculiar boy, who does not actually have a long bottom? In fact, I think it is quite small. Not that I have looked. Much. Robes make it very hard to tell if he has a long bottom, so I gave up by second year. Especially after he caught me looking. I suppose I could have asked, but that would seem rude, wouldn't it?

Of course, the thought of Neville and bottoms brings me to Ronald Weasley. Why, you may ask? Well, because he has the largest bottom I have ever seen, of course. I swear, it's amazing it fits on those little stools in class. Then again, I've never been in class with him before. Perhaps he has to use two stools. But then there wouldn't be enough for everybody… Hmm… Perhaps they simply enlarge the stool with a charm?

But of course, the thought of Ronald Weasley brings me to Hermione Granger. That bookish girl who's not in Ravenclaw. Peculiar, isn't it? Well, I think of her because Ronald's crush on her is terribly obvious. I quite pity her, actually. Ronald is rather thick, so I don't think he notices how horrible they are for each other. I don't know if Hermione realizes this. I don't think she does at the moment. Not as smart as she appears, eh?

But of course, all of this brings me around to Harry Potter. But then, what doesn't come back to Harry Potter, these days? It's all the papers talk about. Aside from Daddy's. We all know that endangered Yacklesnaps are much more important. They are the producers of Floo Powder, after all.

Sometimes I wonder why no one seems to see what's right in front of their faces. I mean, I was astounded that Harry began dating Ginny Weasley. Ginny Weasley, the redhead with a temper so hot she could fry an egg? Yes, that Ginny Weasley. Not that Ginny isn't… Nice, I suppose, but she's… Not. I don't know how to describe her. I suppose I could say that she simply has no control over her anger. I think she gets rather snippy rather easily.

I don't understand why she got so mad at the boys last year. They were just calling me Loony Luna. I don't mind. In fact, I'm actually rather flattered. Then this brings me back to my point about names. You see, everything is related, in one big circle. But of course, I go through the cycle again and end up at Ginny and Harry again.

I think it would be nice if Hermione and Harry got together. They both have names that start with H's. I like names that match. Like my own name. Luna Lovegood. Doesn't it just roll off the tongue?

I think they'd look adorable together. Like Rippled Forkstits and Quivell Suponats.

But I suppose I could be wrong. Maybe they don't like each other in that way. People have always called me delusional or crazy. They think I think oddly. I don't understand why. They all think differently from each other. Just like Neville Longbottom thinks differently from Ronald Weasley. Or Ronald thinks very differently from Hermione Granger. Hmm… Now that I think about it, perhaps I am delusional.

Which reminds me, I think they snuck out last night. Hermione and Harry, I mean. They were not present at breakfast, and Ronald was looking terribly depressed, and moping about. Ginny was not very sympathetic to him. Of course, I don't usually expect her to be. I think her brothers are perfectly nice people, why is she so nasty to them?

Anyway, what was I thinking about before? Oh yes, Harry and Hermione. McGonagall was throwing a fit. I think she was very frightened that Harry disappeared. Who knows, maybe the Dark Lord got him? Of course, I doubt that. I bet that Hermione and Harry are out and about looking for Horcruxes. I overheard them talking about it in the library one day.

I don't think they realize how easily you can be overheard in the library, since everyone else is so quiet all the time. But I think they're looking for them right now, since they seemed to want to find them and battle against the Dark Lord with them or something. I suspect that it is some sort of creature that looks a bit like a cow. I think I shall ask Daddy about them.

Of course, I can't ask Hermione. She seemed rather miffed that I knew more about Crumple-Horned Snorkacks than her. I think she suspects I have a Wrackspurt in my head, making me silly, however I have done all the procedures to remove one, and found that there is, in fact, not one infecting me.

If she were not so rude as to accuse me of making up the existence of Blibbering Humdingers, I would have offered to help her with her boy troubles. I would have suggested that she get together with Harry, since Ronald is a complete baffoon. However, I think she has realized this without my help. She and Harry have runaway together to get married and find all the Horcruxes, so they can defeat the Dark Lord with the creatures' amazing abilities. That is exactly what happened. I'm sure of it.

And they say I'm loony. Or Loopy. Or both. Why can't they just call me Luna? Of course, that brings me back to the beginning of my thoughts. Which then brings me to plants, of course, followed up by Neville Longbottom, who, incidentally, has a very small bottom…

“Miss Lovegood!”

And then Ronald, who has a very big bottom, perhaps he should switch names with Neville, then again, his bottom is large, not long…

“Miss Lovegood!”

Of course, Ronald would be terrible for Hermione, because they'd be constantly fighting. I mean, has she ever screeched like that at anyone else? At Harry?

“Miss Lovegood!”

“Yes?” I asked, looking up at surprise.

Professor Sprout glowered at me under her large hat, which had many plants growing on it. I suspect that she charmed them on, and they're not really growing on her hat. I looked around, and the rest of the class was staring at me too. What was it? Did I have an Aquavirius Maggot in my hair?

“Miss Lovegood, five points from Ravenclaw for daydreaming in class!” Professor Sprout replied, looking ruffled. “Now please tell me the qualities Screechsnap Seedlings when they are fully grown.”

I honestly can't understand why I must know all this. I mean, these plants can easily be looked up in a book. Wouldn't it be more helpful if we addressed some more pressing matters? Like the effects that Nargles have on mistletoe…

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AN: Well, this was told from Luna's point of view, duh. I'm sorry I couldn't be very descriptive on the whole Harry/Hermione thing, but Luna's not a descriptive person. Besides, she wouldn't know very much.

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