Rating: R
Genres: Romance, Humor
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 6
Published: 15/09/2005
Last Updated: 23/01/2006
Status: Completed
Lily Evans is having dreams (or maybe nightmares, she’s undecided) about James Potter, and it’s beginning to affect her school life. She’s already fallen asleep in Transfiguration and forgotten her Charms homework because of these dreams. When James finds out about these dreams, however, it’s like a miracle from heaven, and he uses it to his advantage. Minor plot (and by minor, I mean miniscule), fluffy, rated R for possible later chapters. Short fic.
Rude Awakenings
By Natali
Chapter One: Narcoleptic
“I love you,” he whispered against her hair, breathing in her scent.
She smiled, sighing contentedly. “I know. I love you, too.” She rolled off of him, snuggling close to him. Her fingers toyed with the crisp, curly hairs on his chest as she relived the ecstasy she'd just experienced.
It was perfect. It was… heaven. There was, simply, nothing to describe the feelings inside of her whenever they were together.
He hooked a finger under her chin and raised her head to kiss her, deeply, meticulously. He was so thorough in everything he did—especially when he did her.
“We should get up,” he muttered, not really meaning it. There was nowhere else that he wanted to be, nothing else he wanted to be doing. A biscuit might top things off nicely, but he sure wasn't about to complain.
Lily gave a throaty chuckle, kissing his jawbone. “That would involve getting dressed and dealing with Sirius. Do you think he's still outside the house trying to get in?”
“He's one stubborn son of a bitch,” James sighed, hugging Lily closer. His eyes strayed to the rosy tips of her breasts, where he'd left a bite mark. “You look loved.”
She snorted. “I look beat up. I think you bruised my hips with your hands, you were gripping me so hard.”
For a second, he frowned. “Did I hurt you?”
Lily shrugged, examining her wedding ring closely. “Honestly, it was worth it. You're just a bit aggressive in bed. Remember that time when we had sex in one of the closets at that party? That shelf left the ugliest bruise on my back! I couldn't lie down for two weeks.”
“Don't remind me,” he grumbled. “I try not to hurt you, but you're very delicate, Lils.” He tapped his nose, which she scrunched.
“I resent that. I'm anything but delicate.”
“Of course,” he grinned cheekily, receiving a glare. “Whatever you say, dear.”
“At least you know the right things to say,” she grumbled, sitting up and stretching. “Come on, before Sirius gets frostbite, the twit. No doubt he left his wand at home—again—and can't do a warming charm.”
“I don't know why you think he's stupid,” James said, throwing his legs over the side of the bed. “If I recall correctly, he beat you in Transfiguration N.E.W.T.s—”
“Don't bring that up!” she snapped. “I'm touchy on that subject.”
“Really, now? No idea…”
She gave him a rude gesture, padding down the hall to the last room on the right. She pushed open the door, the familiar blue and white walls greeting her. Reaching the corner of the room where the crib sat, she leaned over and picked up Harry, smiling softly.
“My handsome boy, how did you sleep last night?” she whispered, kissing his nose as he yawned. “Do you want to see if Uncle Sirius proved me right by being a twit and remaining outside? Come, let's go poke fun at him.”
Six-month old Harry chewed on his fingers, reaching for Lily's hair with the other hand. He gave a strong tug, and she laughed.
“You like my hair, don't you, you little bugger?” She kissed his fat hand. “I bet you like it so much you'll end up with a redhead.”
“He won't know what he's getting into, the little stud,” James laughed, heading down the stairs behind her. “You lot a fiery one. Oh, yes, there's Sirius. I think his fingers are frozen in that shape…”
Lily took off the silencing charm she'd used the night before so the knocks and yelling didn't wake Harry, opening the front door. “Hurry up, Black, before my son catches a chill. You'll be unmanned if he does, be warned.”
“Still don't know why the bloody hell you two idiots don't just let me in,” Sirius said, teeth chattering. “And give me a sodding cup of hot coffee, would you?”
“Get it yourself,” Lily shrugged. “And I still don't know why you insist on spending every free minute that you have here in this house—my house.”
“For the last time, Lily, it's like this. My godson needs a good role model, my best mate needs some entertainment, you, my dear, need Sirius.”
Lily rolled her eyes. “I hope you know that if you were anyone else, James would've killed you by now for flirting with me.”
“He can't deny the love we have,” Sirius grinned, smacking James on the back amicably. “Right mate?”
“How could I get in the way of such a happy union?” James said dryly. “Oh, that's right. I'm the one that gets to fuck Lily, not you. Oh, there's also the fact that we've got a son together. Then there's the fact I'm much more handsome than you are—”
“I beg your pardon!” Sirius exclaimed.
“—and therefore we cannot blame Lils for choosing me over you,” James snickered, tossing Sirius a slice of toast.
“James, I only chose you because Sirius is more of a man-whore. You are in no way more attractive than Sirius,” Lily said simply, pouring Sirius a mug of coffee. She winked at him. “I'm sure he's much better in bed.”
“I'll remember that, then,” her husband muttered, smearing butter all over his toast. “Go screw him if you like.”
“And risk you killing me? No, I'll pass, Prongs. You might put up with our flirting, but I'd like to have children some day too, you know,” Sirius chuckled. “Now, how are you today, Harry? I've got a new neighbor, and she's got the nicest pair of—”
“Out!” Lily shrieked. “I will not stand here and let my son be influenced by the likes of you yet, Black. Out of my house! You can come by tonight when your hormones have calmed down. Go bang something.”
Sirius smirked, rising. “Very well. Another thing. It might be prudent for the two of you to close your curtains at night. The whole bloody street could see you.”
“Yes, but you were the only one watching,” James smiled. “Thank you, Padfoot. I'll be in touch with you.”
With a humph, Sirius disapparated.
“I told you he was a twit.” Lily turned back to preparing breakfast.
“Miss Evans.”
“Miss Evans? James, I haven't been Evans for over a year now…”
“Miss Evans. Miss Evans. Miss Evans!”
Lily Evans snapped her head up. “What?”
“Are you tired, Miss Evans?” Professor McGonagall asked. “I'm sorry I'm so boring that you fell asleep. As hard as it might be, it might be beneficial to you if you paid a bit of attention.”
“I'm sorry, Professor,” she blushed, sinking down in her chair as a few snickers passed around the room. “It won't happen again.”
After another moment of glaring at her, Professor McGonagall turned back to teaching the class how to turn machetes into chairs, and Lily had a chance to think about her dream.
How utterly embarrassing! This wasn't the first time, either. Only this time, it was in public. It irked her somewhat, that she found James Potter as attractive as she did. In fact, he was bloody gorgeous, and she couldn't look at him without feeling just a bit hot.
Remus Lupin was sitting next to her with a particularly smug look on his face. He turned to her, giving her a calculating smile. “Nice dream, Lily?”
“I wasn't dreaming,” she lied smoothly, taking down her notes.
“I beg to differ.”
Lily stopped, wondering at his tone. He sounded as if… as if he knew something that he shouldn't. Could she have been talking aloud in her sleep?
“That so?”
He nodded, leaning forward and toward her. “Interesting name fell from your lips, Lily.”
She whipped her head to the side so quickly that Remus jumped, startled.
“What did you hear, Lupin?” she asked nervously. What if she'd been moaning out Potter's name—as she had been doing in her dream—and now the whole class knew? But if she had, McGonagall would've put a stop to it, wouldn't she?
“Relax, I'm the only one that heard,” Remus assured her. “It was barely above a whisper, and I read your lips more than anything.”
Lily gave an internal sigh of relief, but refused to show him that she was. He might just be playing with her, and was waiting for her to give herself away.
“That's quite lovely, but I wasn't dreaming, Remus. Thank you, however, for letting me borrow the notes I missed while I was sleeping.” She reached over and grabbed the roll of parchment and began to take things down.
In the back of the room, James Potter sat next to Sirius Black, and they watched the exchange between their best mate and Lily Evans.
“What do you reckon that's about?” James asked, sucking on a sugar quill. “Remus looked… well, devilish, didn't he?”
“I do believe we're rubbing off on him, finally,” Sirius grinned. “You think they were flirting?”
“That's not how Remus flirts, Sirius, and you know it,” James said, experiencing a sinking feeling in his stomach. It was still a possibility… But would Remus do that, knowing that James liked Lily? Of course not. It was preposterous.
Sirius nodded. “Speaking of things I know, I've never heard of Lily falling asleep in the middle of a class, have you?”
James shook his head. “Most uncharacteristic of her. She's usually quite attentive. Remember the dirty look she gave you that time you fell asleep against her cauldron in Potions?”
Sirius chuckled. “It was a look a pure love, and I knew we were destined to be together from that moment on.”
“You're going to have to get in line mate,” James told him apologetically. “I've got first dibs.” The bell rang for dismissal, and the class rang with the scraping of chairs as everyone stood.
Lily hopped out of her chair and hurriedly gathered her books, practically running away from Remus. She didn't want to—couldn't stand to—confront him. She wasn't entirely sure she could pull off lying to him.
Had he really seen? How mortifying. Of all people to choose to sit next to that day, he'd had to pick her.
She was so lost in thought that she didn't notice that she was about to collide with someone until it was too late.
“Oof!” came her muffled cry, as she registered her face in someone's shirt. She backed away. “Sorry, I wasn't paying—” She stopped short, having realized who it was holding her up. James gave her a boyish grin.
“It's all right, Evans, you seem distracted. I should have been paying more attention.” He released her suddenly, as if remembering they weren't best friends or friends enough to touch each other knowingly. “But I can't say I'm disappointed about our run in. You're a very nice person to bump into. We should meet again sometime, perhaps intentionally.”
Lily was dumbfounded. Was he asking her out? He hadn't done that in at least seven months or so. Not since that time at Hogsmeade on Valentine's Day last year.
“Happy little reunion?” Sirius said, popping up beside them. “Hate to have to drag you away, mate, but we've got something to do. I hear Snivellus was saying something rather crude about Miss Bones, and I feel I have to correct him.”
James nodded, turning back to Lily with a smile. “See you around, Evans.”
He and Sirius walked off, Remus appearing right beside her.
Remus smiled slowly, knowingly. “I won't say anything. But if I happen to give you guys a push in the right direction…—”
“Don't,” Lily said firmly. “It was just a dream. Leave it at that.” She turned and walked off toward the Gryffindor common room for her free period.
It wouldn't do for the Head Girl to fall asleep in her classes. Even as pleasant as that dream had been—as hot, as steamy, as downright… well, sexy, really—she just couldn't let it happen again.
*~*
Lily entered her dormitory, where her best friend was already lying, reading the most recent male Aurors' calendar.
“Vicky… don't you ever stop drooling over that thing?”
Victoria Tiernay grinned. “But you haven't seen July yet, Lily! He's got the biggest—”
“Never mind. It happened again.”
“What did?”
“I had another dream.”
Julia sat upright, eyebrows flying up. There was a devilish gleam in her eye. “What did he do this time? Were you submissive? Or did you get on top and ride him like a horse, you little cowgirl?”
Lily grimaced. “Don't be saying things like that, Vicky. It doesn't suit you. I don't know why you have these lapses and forget that I don't want to have these dreams.”
“Sure you don't,” Victoria snorted, sitting back again and thumbing her way to July. “If you don't want them, Lily, I'll gladly take them for you. I only wish that you'd give me a few more details.”
“Some things aren't meant to be shared.”
“Like men?” Victoria grinned, wiggling her eyebrows. “What's the big deal, anyway? You've been having them for the past month.”
“I fell asleep in class. And I don't even remember falling asleep in the first place. I'm becoming a narcoleptic,” Lily blushed. “And… Remus Lupin heard me mutter his name.”
“Why were you saying Lupin's name?” Victoria asked confusedly. “I thought they were about Potter? You weren't shagging Lupin, too, were you, you little dream-whore! That could seriously hurt their friendship!”
Lily stared at her incredulously. “Would you just stop and hear yourself, Vick?”
Her best friend smiled at her. “Alright, so Lupin heard,” she shrugged, “big deal. What's the problem?”
Lily wriggled her shoulders uncomfortably. “It's awkward. Now he knows I…”
“You what? Like Potter?”
Lily hissed, throwing the closest thing she could find—her hairbrush—at Victoria. “Shut up, what if someone hears you?”
Victoria gave her a condescending look. “You're pathetic, Lily. It's a crush. Go snog him and get it over with.”
With a shout of frustration, Lily picked up her bag and headed for the library, needing to get away from Victoria. That was always her solution.
Go snog somebody.
*~*
James Potter sat back against his favorite tree next to the lake, watching the Giant Squid toss a crab up into the air and back again.
Remus was lying next to him, staring up at the clear blue sky. “Wonder what Sirius is doing.”
“Making out with Miss Bones, I believe,” James replied. “To show her gratitude for his standing up for her.”
Remus nodded. “What's up with you and the Lily situation anyway?”
An alarm went off in James' head. “Why? Are you interested?”
“Of course I'm interested, you're my best mate,” Remus snorted. “Why else would I be asking?”
“No, I meant in her.”
“But you fancy her,” Remus said, bewildered. “Don't you?” Wouldn't it be tragic if James didn't like Lily anymore? That'd be horrible for her, but more than anything embarrassing.
“'Course I do. I was just wondering if you did.”
“Why would I?”
James shrugged. “She's a smart, beautiful, intelligent witch. And she's Head Girl. Isn't that like your dream wife or something?”
“Little early for marriage, Prongs,” Remus laughed. “Besides, like I said, you like her.”
“You can't control your feelings.”
“Well, I can assure you I can control those particular ones,” he smiled, shaking his head. “She's not my type. You like the fiery ones, I'm into the docile ones.”
“That are wild in bed,” James added knowingly. He shut his eyes. “What were you two talking about today in Transfiguration, anyway?”
Remus glanced at him. “Nothing.”
“You're a rotten liar, Remus.”
“She'd been dreaming.”
“About what?”
Knowing it was futile to lie—James had the uncanny ability to figure out when he was—he admitted, “I'm not allowed to say.”
“I hate that you're noble, Moony. I hate every bit.”
His friend shrugged carelessly, smirking. “Right. Back to the Lily situation… You gonna ask her out again, or have you given up?”
James opened his eyes, sitting up to look his friend in the eye. “What are you saying, mate? She didn't dream about me did she?”
Remus didn't reply.
James laughed, whooping loudly as he jumped up. “I'll go now and—”
“She's not on sure foot yet, James. She was in denial. Tell her you figured it out because of me and I'll kill you. Give her some space.”
“I'm not patient.”
“I've noticed,” Remus muttered dryly.
*~*
A/N: Ok, this is gonna be a short fic. I think only three or four chapters, depending how I'd like the story to unfold… No idea where it's going, so yeah. I'd appreciate reviews. And, as I've been doing lately (successfully, I might add), I'll update every week. Meaning, next Thursday (or Friday, depending what part of the world you're in).
This is another one of my insomniac stories. Sorry, again. I'll try to sleep more, LOL. And I'm missing school because I felt nauseous this morning, and I want to be at school because I always fall behind whenever I miss it. Pisses me off. For real.
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Chapter Two: Annoying Socks, Annoying Books
By Natali
~A Few Weeks Later…~
Lily pushed open the door to the back room of the library. It wasn't used often, and mostly the old, forgotten books were stored there. She turned automatically to the right, and then left down the third aisle. After scanning the very top shelf, she stood on tiptoes and slowly edged it out.
No student—not even the Head Girl—was allowed to take things out of the back room. The air in this room was magical, and preserved these ancient tomes.
Hugging the heavy, dusty book to her, she strode for the single desk at the very back of the room, and was startled to find someone there—her reason for doing what she'd been doing for the past three days.
“Oh. Hello, Potter. I didn't think there'd be anyone else here,” she said, trying her hardest not to stutter. She began to back up. “I'll come back some other time, then.”
“No, don't worry,” James said. “There's more than enough room for you here.”
Lily debated staying. But it would be odd, she thought, if she didn't stay for at least five minutes and pretend to have found whatever it was she was searching for—because she would be unable to find what she really wanted to search for while James was there.
He had become James to her about a week ago, when the dreams began to come every night. They were frequent, and almost something that she expected, something she very much looked forward to every night—as much as she hated to admit it.
“Alright,” she acquiesced with a shaky voice, taking the only seat empty at the small table. It was true, there was enough room for two people—five if they really squeezed in—but it didn't help Lily feel any less crowded.
She watched him out of the corner of her eyes, and found (to her complete amusement) that he was looking through an old spell book called Cartoons and How To Make Them. It was odd that this book was in the back room, but she didn't say anything. It entered her mind that perhaps he'd brought it in, just as an excuse to be in here.
They worked on in silence, until James looked up and said, “What are you looking for?”
Lily started, realizing that she hadn't turned the page past the table of contents. “Oh… I've got these annoying pair of socks that someone enchanted and I'm trying to find a way of unenchanting them…”
“Sounds diabolical. Who did that?”
“I don't know.”
“What do the socks do to annoy you?”
“I don't know.”
James raised an eyebrow. “Now, I know we're not exactly bosom buddies, Evans, but I don't think telling me what your charmed socks do to annoy you is such a big secret,” he grinned. “Unless they do something extremely naughty…”
A bit peeved by his third degree and slightly curious as to what a pair of socks could do that would be considered “naughty”, Lily couldn't help herself from asking, “Such as?”
James shrugged, going back to his book. “I suppose you'd have to tell me. You're the one with the naughty socks.”
“I don't have naughty socks. Not like that anyway.”
“Nor do I. Can't imagine why you thought I'd know what naughty socks did, as I have none.”
In spite of herself, Lily smiled a bit. “I can't imagine why either.” They fell once more into silence, only this time it was a bit more amicable. Lily thumbed through the five-page long table of contents until she found the right page.
Often times, wizards and witches have dreams that are not at all pleasant to them. There are, of course, ways to remove such pestilences, and they vary as the dreams vary.
For dreams that predict the future, turn to page 356.
For dreams that start off pleasantly and turn nightmarish, turn to page 548.
For dreams that involve drowning in a big tub of marshmallows, refer to page 45 for information on “Odd Attributes Of A Warlock”.
For dreams (more correctly classified as nightmares) that have your childhood phobia walk in on you whilst bathing, turn to page 498. If these dreams include the Sand Man marrying the Boogey Man and reproducing bright orange demon children, see your local hospital or asylum.
For any other dreams that do not fall under these categories, please read below.
Lily frowned. And she thought she had problems? What lunatic had a dream about drowning in marshmallows or orange demon children? She continued reading.
Unfortunately, most dreams are incurable and usually go away with time. The only thing This Author can recommend is having a couple shots of gin before bed, and thinking about pleasant things.
Beware, however, of two things. One, falling prey to alcoholism. Two, falling prey to insomnia.
For further information…
Lily slammed the book shut, angry. This was the fourth book that told her there was nothing she could do about her recurring dreams. They obviously didn't predict the future, because she and James would never get married. They'd probably never even date!
She stood, picking up the book and her stuff to leave.
“Are you having a lot of unwanted dreams lately as well as annoying socks, Evans?” James asked, a certain twinkle in his eyes that Lily couldn't understand.
“Yes,” she admitted hesitantly.
“Are they unpleasant?”
“Not exactly. They just disturb my sleep. I'll see you tomorrow for class,” she replied, turning and heading for the correct shelf to replace the book.
“We really should stop bumping into each other, Evans. It's not going to look like a coincidence for much longer,” he called after her.
She looked back at him and responded, “Yes, I know. This doesn't happen too often, so I'm sure there's no reason to fret about it quite yet.”
James leaned back in his chair, a grin spreading slowly on his face. Not unpleasant, eh? Well, he'd take what he could get…
*~*
A couple weeks after seeing James in the back room, Lily was back yet again. She hadn't returned since then, but an idea had popped into her head the day before.
What if someone was purposely placing those dreams in her head? Legilimens were a crafty lot, and she was in no way a good Occlumens. It was a definite possibility!
There was, of course, the question of who would do that and why they would have a desire to do so, but she would cross that bridge when she got there.
James was the obvious choice, but while he was great at many things, she highly doubt that Legilimency was amongst them.
After asking Madame Pince (who seemed extremely suspicious of her questions, but answered nevertheless), Lily had obtained the name of the book she needed.
Spotting it, Lily slid it out and for a second thought to look around for the rest of it. It couldn't be more than twenty pages thick, while all its fellows ranged usually around the hundreds!
But she took it and headed for the back table anyway, opening as she did so. The pages were blank. Why were they blank? She flipped to the very first page, and found only a few sentences there.
If someone is indeed using Legilimency to put thoughts or dreams into your mind, there is no certain way of knowing unless you are an Occlumens, in which you will certainly already know when someone is tampering with your head. The only remedy, therefore, is to learn Occlumency.
For tips on learning Occlumency, please purchase my book Blocking What Is Meant To Be Blocked.
--Mark DiClarko
Lily stopped walking, and was sorely tempted to throw the book but had an idea that Madame Pince would storm through the door that instant and expel her from the library for all eternity, along with her offspring for abusing books in such a manner.
How could they have devoted an entire book to just two paragraphs?! How could Hogwarts keep it in their library?! She was furious.
At the very bottom of the very same page, were the words: This work receives the award for shortest book ever printed.
Sodding morons, the lot of them!
*~*
“I don't know what else to do, Professor Dumbledore,” Lily sighed, tugging at a piece of her hair. She'd come to confide in Dumbledore, at the end of her tether. “These dreams are driving me up the wall and they're affecting my schoolwork. I've had to keep Victoria Tiernay around me at all times because I have this knack of falling asleep quite suddenly, if I have so much as two seconds to sit down.”
The Headmaster nodded, his fingers forming a steeple. “What are these dreams about, Miss Evans, if you don't mind my asking?”
She blushed. “I'd—I'd rather not say if I didn't have to, sir.”
“Ah.”
“No! No `ah'! It's not like that. It's just… these dreams involve a certain someone that I sort of wish that they didn't involve, sir,” she said hurriedly, wanting desperately to correct him of his impression—however originally correct that impression had been.
Dumbledore seemed to be suppressing a smile, but it disappeared so quickly that Lily was sure she must have imagined it. “I wish I could tell you how to relieve yourself, Miss Evans, but I haven't the faintest clue. I've never had the pleasure of having a dream.”
“Never, Professor?”
“Not a one.”
“I'm not sure whether to say I'm sorry or to congratulate you,” she admitted.
“I believe that dreams—much like suffering and other things in life—are things that we must deal with in order to grow in personality and maturity, Miss Evans. They have both their positive and negative sides. I have happened to miss out on that, but it's also a blessing. Two-sided, once again.”
Lily nodded. “Thank you for listening to me, headmaster. I feel better, really.”
He inclined his head. Just as she was about to open the door, he added, “It has been my experience, that when people have told me how their more bothersome dreams went away, it involved acting out that dream to a certain extent in real life.”
Lily didn't turn around, because she was sure she was as red as a tomato. “I'm afraid that's not quite possible in my case. But thank you anyway, sir. I'll see you tomorrow for the Head meeting.”
“As it's the first, I expect it to take at least a couple hours, so I suggest you do any homework beforehand.”
“Will do, professor.”
*~*
The following afternoon, James walked into his last class of the day to find a note from Lily atop his desk. It stated that the Head meeting had been moved to an empty classroom, as Dumbledore would be unable to attend.
Shit. He'd forgotten all about the Head meeting. Thankfully, Lily was good at those sorts of things. He'd ask her to remind him each time they rolled around…
He wondered if she realized just how much time they'd be spending together now that Head meetings and duties would commence. Of course, they'd had short discussions in the beginning of the year, especially instructing the Prefects on the train ride, but they'd had no major interaction.
This was all sure to change now.
Three hours later, James stepped into one of the empty classrooms on the third floor. Lily was already there, staring stupidly at the furthest wall, her back to him. She hadn't noticed he was there.
He walked slowly, without a care in the world—and with a very clear purpose—towards her. He didn't try to make noise but nor did he try not to. It couldn't be said he'd done it on purpose.
Having reached her, he leaned over her shoulder so that his lips were just an inch from her ear and whispered, “Boo.”
Lily screamed and fell out of her chair, managing to hit him over the head just before.
“You prat!”
James grinned, offering her his hand. She ignored it and got up on her own.
“You must've been concentrating like the very devil, Evans.”
Lily glared up at him, running a hand through her hair in an effort to brush it a little. She was distressed, for two reasons. One, she looked like shit—or possibly even worse—because she'd just woken up from a dream with her hair and make up mussed. Two, she actually cared that she looked like shit—or possibly even worse, for the sole reason that James was there to view her shittiness.
She took out her mirror briefly, while she thought he wasn't looking, and was startled when it was pulled from her hands.
“You look fine, Evans.” He threw the mirror back into her bag. “You always do.”
She nodded, unsure of whether to thank him or not. She probably would've—if only because it was mechanical and she was raised to do so—except she found it oddly pleasing that he thought she always looked “fine”.
“Dumbledore had to back out last minute, but he gave me a list of things we need to cover before we leave,” she explained. “When I went to his office after lunch, he said that we'd need to set up our own meetings, besides the ones that we have with him in order to work on these things.” She looked up at him, and he seemed to be paying attention, so she continued. “In short, we're going to be seeing a whole lot of each other this year.”
He smiled slowly, and so charmingly, that she smiled back.
*~*
“I was just wondering… Why haven't you asked me out since last year?” Lily asked as they walked out the door for the Gryffindor common room nearly four hours later. Somewhere after the first hour, they'd gotten extremely comfortable with each other. James had removed his tie and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. She'd conjured a couch so that they could work comfortably and had taken off her shoes and socks.
With her legs thrown over his knees casually, they'd laughed and joked, and just had a good time.
She was surprised, needless to say.
Her question seemed to catch him off guard, and he stopped for a moment. “Here, let me take those for you,” he muttered, taking the books from her. “I don't know why. I guess it got old, didn't it? I'm not five and I just moved on past that point.” He glanced at her. “Besides, you didn't seem very interested, did you?”
Lily nodded, a little disappointed. He moved on, and that was the end of that—whatever that was. “Yeah, I got that. Makes sense. Thanks, I guess. It was getting old.”
“If you'd like, I'd be quite happy to resume though,” he chuckled.
She shook her head, grinning. “You're terrible. Now that I know your heart isn't in it, I might just hex you so bad your blue blood ancestors feel it.”
He didn't reply for a minute, taking a step that probably shouldn't have been taken. “I don't think you're any less of a witch than those from the purest of families, you know. You're just brilliant, to put it simply.” He almost regretted it—he was sorely tempted to stop and snog her, for some reason unknown to him (besides, of course, the fact that he was a horny teenager who wanted to snog nonstop constantly).
“Thank you, I think. That was a bit random.”
“I think that's why I was so attracted to you. You proved that you weren't different, or worse anyway. You're probably better than any of us could ever hope to be,” James mused. As an afterthought, he added, “And that temper of yours is right sexy.”
Lily laughed. “Does your mum evil call you Satan?”
“Nope. That's reserved for my dad,” he chuckled. “I'm the devil's son.” They'd reached the portrait hole, and Lily muttered the password. James held her back. “A minute. I think we could be on first name terms, don't you? We're going to be getting awfully close this year.”
Lily cocked her head and studied him for a moment. “Sounds good to me… James.” She turned and left, heading immediately for her dormitory.
James stood there for a moment frozen in time, letting her voice spread over him. There was nothing better, he decided then, than to hear Lily Evans say his name.
Nothing.
*~*
A/N: Ok, I'm posting this a day early, just for kicks, and mainly because I want to have feedback. I think I've finally figured out the twists and turns I want this story to take, and what each chapter shall be about. I think I might sort of prolong it to four or five chapters, but yeah. If you know me (which some of you do), then you know I never really make up my mind. I might decide to make a story thirty chapters and end up with twelve, or vice versa (ok, I've never done a thirty chapter story, I think I'd lose my mind with that kind of plot). So yeah.
And so, feedback is appreciated!
An anonymous reviewer asked if I would go without sleep until this story is finished, and I thought that was funny. I usually apologize for my insomniac fics—they tend to be fluff lol. But thanks for the laugh.
Maddudewalking I think deserves some kind of recognition. You read all my stories, and you're slowly but surely becoming one of my favorite reviewers. So yeah, thanks.
I'm in a thankful mood because I'm putting off sleep. But, as I'm tired, I think I'll go. Love you all!
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Chapter Three: Out of Options
By Natali K. A.
“Lils.”
Lily didn't turn around, but instead kept chewing her quill. It wasn't fair. She shouldn't be so susceptible to his charm anymore. They'd been dating a few months, and she shouldn't want to drop everything just to up and kiss him.
It wasn't bloody fair!
“Lils,” he repeated. His voice sounded closer, and she heard soft footfalls that let her know he was nearing. “We need to talk.” She felt his hand on her shoulder.
She shook her head.
James was beginning to get a bit frustrated. He had said something—he had meant something—and she was choosing to ignore that.
James Potter was not one to be ignored.
“Fine. I'll talk, you listen,” he said sharply. “I don't regret what I said. I meant it. And whether or not you like it, Lily Evans, you are going to be Lily Potter one day!” Peeved, he stalked out of her room, slamming the door behind him.
Lily sighed, dropping her quill and allowing her head to make contact with her desk.
It wasn't bloody fair.
Later that night, Lily tossed and turned in her bed, unable to sleep. How could she? Her boyfriend—her loving, caring, absofuckinglutely perfect boyfriend—was mad at her. He wouldn't ever admit it, and he wouldn't let on, but she knew. How couldn't she? When you loved someone, you knew them. She knew him.
Fed up with her insomnia, she threw off her covers and got out of her bed. Throwing on her robe, she walked out of the dormitory she shared with the other Seventh Year girls. The girls she'd lived with for the past seven years, and the girls she'd leave behind soon. Oh, sure, they'd stay in touch. It was impossible not to. Lily couldn't imagine ever going a day without communicating with Victoria in some way, or going years and years without at least writing a Christmas card to the others. But it would never be the same.
She tiptoed to the door of James' room, hesitating before quietly opening the door. Thankfully, it didn't creak as Hogwarts doors tended to. She'd only caught a glimpse of this room once or twice—she hadn't ever had much of a reason to be in it. James would usually hunt her down in her room, and they got more privacy there anyway. The Marauders seemed to inhabit this room more than any other (except, perhaps, the kitchens).
Nevertheless, it didn't take her more than a few seconds to figure out which bed belonged to James. His curtains were drawn, for one, and he would definitely have been in the mood to brood tonight. Second, a picture of him and her hugging on Valentine's Day (well, they were actually snogging like there was no tomorrow at that moment…) on the night table beside it. His bed was by the window, just as she'd known it would be.
The others were asleep, and if they'd heard her come in, they didn't show any signs of it. She carefully headed for his bed, stopping right beside it.
What if the curtains were drawn because he had some skank stashed there and had slept with her? What if this would be the end of their relationship?
You're an idiot, Lily snapped at herself. As if he's so low class as to do that. No, he's not the cheating type. It would offend his honor.
Sliding the curtain aside, Lily silently shrugged off her robe and threw it on the night table, crawling onto the bed and closed the curtains again.
She had to smile to herself as she watched him sleep. He was angrier than she'd thought. He hadn't even undressed or taken off his glasses. His face was screwed up in a grimace. She lifted his glasses off his nose and set them on the night table, stretching out next to him.
She wanted him, damn it. More than he probably knew.
She wanted him in all the ways it was possible to want a man—as her best friend, as her lover, as her husband, as the father of her children… She just plain wanted him, and it pissed the logical part of her off.
Lily Evans didn't want to rely on anybody for happiness, not even James Potter. Or perhaps, especially not James Potter.
She didn't understand it—wasn't sure she even wanted to!—but it didn't stop her from being angry with herself. She'd hurt him.
Lily sighed, brushing his unruly hair out of his eyes and kissing his cheek. She loved him—didn't he know that? Did he have to hear the words? Couldn't he understand how hard they were for her to say, that she wasn't the type of person that spoke her love, but showed it? But he knew, he had to know. How couldn't he? Did he only want confirmation?
James shifted, his arm going automatically around her, bringing her closer to him. She laid her head on his shoulder, as she'd done many times. And then, she couldn't help it—a tear slid down her cheek.
“Lils… Go to sleep and stop worrying,” James mumbled, barely audible. “I'm not mad at you.”
“You should be,” she whispered. “I'm sorry.”
He cracked his eyes open, taking out his wand. “Silencio.” Putting his wand away, he turned onto his side to look at her. “I'm not mad, and that would be a stupid reason to be mad at you.”
“You're upset.”
“I'm frustrated.” He took the hand she had put on his chest and kissed each finger tip. “But I'm not mad. Lils, I could never be mad at you, and I doubt you'd ever give me a reason anyway.”
She sniffed, holding back tears. “Oh, I don't know about that.”
“I do.” He squeezed her hand gently, placing a kiss on her forehead. “Lily, don't worry yourself. You're stressed as it is with exams coming up.”
“But you're more important than any stupid exam, James!” she said, somewhat hysterically. “You matter more to me.”
“Yeah, but I'm not going anywhere, am I?” He gave her an Eskimo kiss, and she laughed.
“I just… I just… love you.”
He smiled down at her. “I know.”
Then the dam broke, and she began to cry in earnest.
James didn't have the faintest idea why, as crying females was definitely not something he enjoyed experiencing. But he soothed her—as every smart male should—and soon enough she had quieted.
He made small circles on her back with his thumbs, littering feathery kisses all over her face.
“James…?”
“Hmm?”
There was a pause. “Make love to me.”
He raised a brow, then opened his mouth to say something, but Lily cut him off.
“If you ask me if I'm sure, Potter, I swear I'll hex you. That's such cliché line,” she grinned, wrapping her arms around his neck. He smiled down at her, a chuckle rumbling in his chest.
James tugged Lily to him, catching her lips in an incendiary kiss. His hands roamed her body, learnt her body, memorized her body.
And Lily wanted him—more than ever—only this time, she didn't have to worry.
She figured out he wanted her just as much.
*~*
Lily gasped, sitting up in her bed. She was dripping in sweat, her hair sticking to her neck. Her chest rose and fell rapidly, struggling to get the air that was necessary. This dream was longer than usual. They were becoming clearer every night, and she was beginning to worry. They weren't showing any signs of going away.
Shaking, she threw the covers off of her and stood. She needed to go for a walk.
She shrugged on a robe—much like she had in her dream—and opened the door to her room, heading for the common room. Maybe a few minutes staring into the warm fire would help clear her mind a bit. It always did soothe her…
Choosing the love seat nearest to the fire, Lily sat down to think.
What was she going to do? It was getting worse, and the dreams were getting better and better…
The latter was something that frightened her very much. She wasn't sure if she was ready to handle this conviction growing inside of her. She was starting to fancy James Potter very, very much.
It was nearing late November, and she was still having trouble staying awake in class. Victoria had to wake her up daily now, before the dreams got too far.
But his personality was magnetic. It would have been different, had he been the same person from Fifth Year, or even early Sixth. But he wasn't—he was warm, kind, caring, and attentive. Most of all, he was considerate, and not so much conceited as confident. Confidence wasn't a bad thing.
He made her laugh and think about all the pleasant things in the world: a sunny day, an ice cream in Hogsmeade, reading the joke page in the Daily Prophet…
It was different and she loved it.
Lily thought about her predicament some more, going round and round in circles as she'd already overanalyzed it manifold. All that was left was to memorize every fact, every thought that ran through her head.
It was just a crush, she reasoned. She'd be leaving Hogwarts this year, and it was just one last final crush.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Lily dozed off, the fire dancing mockingly upon her face, careless and free.
She dreamt again, only this time it was one big blur—dancing, laughing, toasting, celebrating…
James Potter lay sleeping upstairs, unaware of her worry or doubt, blissfully dreaming away the night. There was a small smile on his lips and in his hands was clutched a scrap of paper he'd found on the floor earlier.
Lils, if you're so worried about these dreams, why don't you just ask Potter about them? Personally, I'd kill to have erotic dreams like that, but that's just me.
Yes, but Vicky, you're ridiculously horny. And I can't say a word to him—and neither can you, you meddlesome witch! Don't think I'm not keeping my eye on you.
You offend me. I'd never do such a thing!
I highly doubt that.
Well, fine. But we'll chat later, it's about time for class to be over.
*~*
Lily awoke earlier than usual, and decided to make her way to the library on a hunch. She didn't want to think it, but couldn't see any other way.
She walked to the back room of the library and slid out a purple volume, turning to page 356—“Dreams That Predict The Future”.
Often times, there is the possibility of receiving dreams that predict the future. Symptoms of this include: random naps, clear dreams that seem almost as if they're in real life, increased appetite, dreading the nighttime.
There are no real solutions for this, only to make the best of it. Many lives have been saved because of such dreams, and there is much money to be made in that industry—if you prove yourself correct, that is.
And that was it. Lily was extremely annoyed with the fact that these books didn't go into much detail. With a snort of disgust, she shut the book, and bit her lip.
She was falling asleep randomly, her dreams were clear, and she did dread nighttime—well, only partially. Part of her—the naughty part—longed for nightfall, just so that the dreams would occur.
She didn't have an increased appetite, but she didn't need to be experiencing each symptom, just a few. The fact was, she was most likely having prophetic dreams—or at least something related to them.
It was official. She was out of options.
And there wasn't one damn thing she could do about it.
*~*
A/N: Ok. Well. Um. Yeah, I realize this is late—it won't even be Thursday in half an hour's time—but I really was swamped with work. By pure luck, I'd had half of this written last Saturday, so I'd gotten that out of the way, and I just had to wrap it up a bit.
Yes, I realize is a couple hundred words shorter than usual. Deal, sorry. But Yearbook is a tad more important than this, and I can only do what I can. I'd really appreciate a few heartfelt prayers concerning that—I need a little guidance in that area.
There's also the fact that I haven't been getting much sleep, though I can't understand why as I haven't been doing much… *Sigh*
Moving on. Um, for those of you who are getting a tad bored (because even I am), there will be some action in the next chapter. And I'm sorry to leave you hanging in the dream portion of this chapter, as I'm sure you're all craving smut. But I couldn't resist, lmao.
Right, James will definitely be making some sort of move on Lily next chapter, though I have not yet decided what…
Thanks to my readers and reviewers, and I'd love to hear back! There's this little wee box you can write in, and just click a button and it sends it to my inbox! Smart, innit? Yes, make the best of technology, loves!!
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Four: Finally
By Natali K. A.
“I'm tired of waiting,” James whined to Remus. “It's Christmas holiday! What time better than now when every bloody girl is wishing and hoping for someone to kiss her under the mistletoe? It's the most romantic time of the year!”
Remus grinned at James. “Calm down, mate.”
“No!”
“Seriously. Chill.” Remus tossed a ball into the air and then caught it. “Alright. Ask her out. I think it's time.”
James stopped his pacing. “Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
James scratched his chin. “What if she rejects me?”
Remus threw a pillow at him from his bed.
“Suck it up! I've heard enough of your whining!”
James grinned, snatching up his Head Boy badge. “I'm going to go find her. Maybe we'll go out to dinner before we discuss our duties.”
*~*
Lily lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling.
She loved him. Gosh, how she loved him!
She wanted to show him how much she loved him—but how does one go about showing such a strong emotion as that?
“Lily,” James muttered. “You're thinking again.”
“I know,” she smiled fondly into the dark. His hand found hers on the bedspread.
“What were you thinking about?”
“How much I love you.”
She could almost see James smiling cockishly into the dark.
“Those are nice thoughts. But go to sleep, Lils. You haven't been sleeping a lot lately.”
Lily sighed. “Babe, I'm sorry about earlier.”
“For what? Lily, you don't seriously think that I'm upset because you didn't want to—”
“It's not that I didn't want to. I didn't feel good.”
“And that's alright,” James crooned. He pulled her close to him. “In case you haven't noticed, I like you for more than the sex—though that does rock my world.”
Lily grinned at him. She wanted to show him how much she loved him… She thought she knew how…
“My hormones are a little crazy at the moment,” she explained. “But I want to now.”
James laughed. “Lils, it's nearly three in the morning and we've got to wake up early tomorrow.”
“But I can't sleep.”
“Why ever not, my love?”
“Too much on my mind,” Lily sighed, snuggling into the crook of his arm. “I found out some news today.”
“Good or bad?”
“Well, both actually. Good for every other person on earth—bad for me.”
“What happened, Lily?” James asked worriedly.
“I'm pregnant.”
For a moment, the world around them stopped. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named never existed, Dark times were not upon them, their world was not in jeopardy, and most of all they were just Lily and James again. Just that and nothing else.
“Am I the father?” James stuttered. He was sure had he been standing he would've fallen.
Lily snorted. “Well who else is going to bloody be?”
“No, no, of course. I just… Ah.” For once, James Potter was speechless. “But we always did the charm—”
“Not true,” Lily amended. That week in Wales was a bit lax, wasn't it? I remember seven specific times when we didn't use the charm.”
James did some math in his head. “Bloody hell, Lils.” She felt his hand run down to her stomach. “We're going to have a baby.”
Lily instantly felt guilty for labeling this “bad news”. He sounded so excited and exuberant at the mere thought of having a baby with her.
“I know,” she whispered, catching his lips. “I just wish it wasn't now, what with You-Know-Who—”
“I don't give a sodding shit!” James exclaimed, bouncing up in the bed and pulling her to him. “We're bringing a life into the world, Lils. Oh, Lils…” His lips found the pulse at her neck and he suckled softly. A shiver racked her as she wound her arms around his neck. “You have never seemed more beautiful to me than you do now.”
Lily's eyes felt wet. “I wanted to show you how much I love you. I couldn't think of anything else. You've wanted a baby so much, James. I won't lie. I think part of me didn't want to use any sort of protection. I purposely didn't mention anything in Wales.”
He didn't reply. His hands were too busy slipping off the big shirt she slept in, his lips too busy claiming her own. He had never been so gentle with her.
Slowly, reverently—almost as if he was afraid of hurting her—he lay her down in the center of the bed and came over her. Then he began his worship of her.
She'd always been very grateful of the fact that he took pleasure in her own pleasure. He would take extreme measures to make sure she got what she deserved.
His hot, wet lips pressed open-mouthed kisses down from her throat to her naked breasts. His beard had already begun to grow in and he scratched her as he laved her peaked nipples. He sucked one then sucked the other even harder.
Lily grasped the bed sheets tightly as he made his way lower, littering soft feathery kisses all over her abdomen.
When he reached her simply pink cotton knickers, he tugged them off with his teeth, feeling not a bit embarrassed about rubbing her red curls in his face. Once it was past her upper thigh, he reached up and yanked them off. His hands strayed up her inner thighs, lingering just around her most intimate spot as he littered yet more kisses on her thighs.
James' tongue would dart out and in, out and in, out and in repeatedly as Lily's breaths grew more desperate and her control began to waver. An impatient hum slipped out and James got the message.
He tenderly set his tongue to her center, undulating the pressure. Lily's hips bucked but his hands kept her steady as he continued the pleasurable torture. He nibbled, licked, rolled, and did almost everything he could think of until at last on a cry of passion Lily climaxed, clutching his head.
The waves shook her seconds after as he continued to play with the tiny bud to extricate every single ounce of pleasure that he could.
“Gosh, James,” Lily gasped, lying boneless in the bed. “Are you trying to kill me?”
She felt rather than heard the chuckle that rumbled in his chest as he placed one last kiss on her and pull himself above her.
Lily beckoned him closer with open arms, wrapping them surely around him when he obliged.
“I love you, Lils,” he said hoarsely. His voice sounded watery but she didn't make a comment. “I love our baby, but I love you more.”
Somewhat recovered from her pleasure, she stroked his back softly. “Go to sleep, baby. You're tired.”
“Not that tired,” James said curtly, pushing away from her and situating himself at her entrance.
Lily laughed, repositioning herself to welcome him easier. “Go for it,” she said softly, the smallest trace of a smile on her lips.
With one thrust, he'd imbedded himself in her. She was wet and hot and soft and delicious… James groaned. He never got tired of that feeling and it only got better with time.
Minutes later he'd brought them both to their peak and they were slowly making their way back to the real world. He made to disengage himself from her but she stopped him.
“Stay, please. I like how you make me feel,” Lily mumbled sleepily, her eyes already closing.
“But what if I hurt you, Lils?”
There was no response. Lily was already off in a dreamless sleep, a pleased and satisfied look on her face. James rolled his eyes and rolled them both over so that she was on top.
She always fell asleep right after sex. What was with that anyway?
He looked at his wife and couldn't help but feel anything but the greatest love for her. She was so utterly perfect and he would never think otherwise. Even her faults were perfect.
Yet he had to face the facts. There was a Dark wizard coming to power and there were bad times up ahead. His child would likely be raised in a time of fear and uncertainty and there wasn't anything he could do about it. He would protect his family as best as he could, but there was no way he could assure their safety.
He felt powerless and hated it. He hated it more than he hated the Dark wizard.
“Stop thinking,” Lily whispered, taking his hand. “Get some sleep.”
He laughed shortly and obeyed her, falling into a dream wrought with fears and dark hooded figures and blinding flashes of white-green light.
*~*
This time Lily awoke slowly. She knew the dream had finished for once and had not stopped somewhere before the end. She'd finished an entire dream and felt flushed with fever.
“Lily, snap out of it,” she told herself sternly. Just then, she heard footsteps coming down the stairs which was odd for a Hogsmeade weekend. She turned and found James Potter walking towards her.
“Good afternoon,” Lily nodded.
“Good afternoon,” James repeated, stopping a foot in front of her. “Want to go for a walk, Lily?”
“Sure.” She accepted his outstretched hand and they walked out of the common room together, heading for what Lily presumed were the grounds.
“I've been meaning to talk to you lately, about a matter of something a tad important,” James began once they'd reached the outdoors. They took a left to go around the back of the castle.
“Oh? Head duties?” Lily asked.
“No. On the subject of dreams actually.”
Lily almost stopped breathing but managed to keep her cool. “Dreams, James? Are they troubling you?”
“No, they're troubling you.”
Lily ceased walking and turn to look him in the eye. “What are you talking about?”
“I know that you've been having dreams about me.”
Her blush gave her away and she knew it was futile to deny it. “Fine. Yeah, I am having some… disturbing dreams about you, if you must know.”
“Disturbing?” Lily could tell he was trying not to grin. She felt as if he had anyway.
“Yes, disturbing. What you're too pretty for anyone to be having disturbing dreams about you?” Lily snapped as she continued walking. “Or is it a disturbing dream only when you keep your clothes on?”
“My nudity isn't relevant, Lily,” James smiled. “It's what I'm doing that is. Clothes or no clothes isn't much of a problem.”
Lily blushed once more. “Well, fine, but these dreams disturb me.”
“Why? Are they prophetic?”
“Gosh, I hope not!” she exclaimed hysterically, stopping once more and almost bumping into him. She avoided touching any part of him. “They're not prophetic,” she said with more poise and conviction. “In the least.”
“Funny thing dreams. They tend to express your dearest, deepest, darkest desires.”
“Enough of the alliterations, James. Don't be daft. My deepest, darkest desire isn't to shag you, for heaven's sake!”
He let out a chortle. “You're right, probably not all that deep at all, is it?”
She was tempted to slap him.
“Alright, alright,” he said. “I'll be serious now. Well, not—”
She had come to know him so well in the past few months that she knew what he was about to say. “Don't you dare make a Sirius pun or I promise I'll knee your family jewels right this instant, Potter. They're disgusting and not funny in the least.”
“I'm not sure about the disgusting part, but I should hope my jewels aren't funny,” he said, feigning offense. “No, seriously, I'll be serious. I've known for months you know.”
“Known what exactly?” Lily said snappishly, forgetting what the initial conversation was about.
“About your dreams, of course.”
Her eyebrows nearly flew off her face. “Remus told you, did he?”
“I'm supposed to say no.”
“How pleasant of him to have done so.”
“I thought so, actually.” He paused and took a step nearer to her, to which she backed up. “I want to talk to you about it, Lily.”
“There's nothing to talk about. They'll go away soon,” she stated stubbornly, crossing her arms and all. Before she could take another step, he got closer and clamped her to him, his arms anchoring her.
“But my feelings won't.”
Lily sighed deeply, the strength leaving her. “James, it's a school crush and will disappear in no time. I don't have the time to waste on a boyfriend with N.E.W.T. testing nearly here. I've even already begun to study,” she explained softly. “It wouldn't work, we're too different.”
“Not as different as you think.”
She considered his face for a minute before agreeing, “No, we're not I suppose. It's not that I'm not attracted, I just don't have the bloody time to spend on a boyfriend or on dating or even on leisure time. Had it been last year I probably would've said yes, but it's not. It's this year. It's now. We don't have the time.”
“Nothing complicated, Lily,” James whispered, leaning down to her. “No official titles till school is over. We don't even have to date or spend any time together. Just tell me that you want it. I can wait if that's the truth.”
Lily felt powerless yet strangely protected in his arms as she was. There wasn't a thing he could ask that she could deny him at that moment. “I do want it.”
His lips edged nearer and the only thing that could fit between them at the moment was a scrap of parchment.
“Then that's enough.”
His lips swooped down on hers and she instinctively opened herself to him. It was the most enchanting feeling in the world. The dreams would good—the reality was better.
“Mmm,” Lily hummed as they parted. “I… Uh…”
“Nothing. You don't have to say a word. When you're ready, that'll be enough and I'll be here waiting,” he told her, voice low and raw. “But until then, I don't see the harm in giving our mouths time to get acquainted.”
“Oh,” was all Lily could say as he brought her even closer and kissed her again, this time with more desire, desperation, and hunger.
It felt good, but she couldn't shake off the fact that she couldn't trust him completely yet.
He'd asked her dozens of times to go out on a date with her, and each time she had turned him down. So what was the difference this time? Had he really changed from the cocky, big-headed prat she'd known for most of her Hogwarts career?
*~*
A/N: Ok, sorry it's taken all day, but I'm terribly sick. I've got a slight fever at the moment and I felt faint earlier. But it's here, on time, even though I wish I'd gotten it out earlier. My apologies, but somehow I don't think anyone will be too upset.
Now, to clarify: They aren't dating at the moment. They're… Well technically they're friends with benefits, but let's agree on that it's definitely more than that, eh? Also, Lily isn't upset with the fact that she's having a baby, but actually more concerned with the fact of the time that she'll have to raise that baby.
Some people might disagree on the fact that you love your spouse more than you love your children. I myself think that you have more (if you use the term loosely, anyway) love for someone you created and brought up than someone you met. But I think we can agree as well on the fact that Lily and James aren't an everyday couple and their love can stand the test of time. While it's unfair and untrue to say that James loves the baby “more”, I ask you to settle for the idea that it's different types of love. Obviously James won't ever find his child attractive in the way that he finds Lily attractive (and if you're into that kind of yucky stuff, this fic is not the one for you).
I don't think this was the direction I'd planned on taking this particular chapter, but I'll let it be for now. I think another chapter or so should do it, maybe with an epilogue to boot. I'm not sure. We'll see.
So, I ask for prayers concerning my ill health, and for reviews to make me feel better. :- D
I know a lot of people have been waiting for them to get together already and for some smut. I hope you had your fulfillment of that. (I'm a terrible smut author, so I ask for forgiveness).
Love you all and thanks for your reviews and your patience!
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Five: Sleepover
By Natali K. A.
On the first day back home from school—for good, this time—Lily woke up and new instantly that something was wrong.
What was it? Maybe it'd been something she'd dreamt about? She'd dreamt about her wedding last night, she was sure. No, that was three days ago. Was it the wedding night? No, that was the night after that. Harry's birth? No, that was her last night in Hogwarts… So what had she dreamt about?
“Nothing,” she realized out loud. “Not a fucking thing.” She wasn't sure whether to be scared or not. These dreams had been with her all throughout her Seventh Year, and now they were gone.
“Lils?” James stretched and yawned next to her. “Something the matter?”
“Shh, someone will hear you,” Lily whispered. “James, I didn't have a dream last night.”
James grinned proudly. “I don't know. I heard you call my names a few times. Even that name I like you to call me.”
“James, I didn't dream.”
“I never said you were sleeping, babe.”
She grabbed her pillow and hit him over the head. “Lucky I'm a witch. Oh, bright idea, huh? Muffliato.”
“Smart,” James yawned. He reached out and pulled her to lie down with him. She spread her hand over his heart, thinking all the while.
“No dream. What do you think that meant?”
He shrugged. “You've got the real thing. What does it matter?”
“It's got to mean something, that's all. What if something's wrong?”
James turned his head to take her lips and kiss her. “I thought you didn't like having the dreams, Lily.”
“I bloody loved those dreams!” she said somewhat hysterically. “They were hot! It was the only way I made it sane out of the exams this year.”
“There's me, too.”
“Yes, but I didn't have enough time to shag you as much as I did in the dreams.”
“I resent that you had the dreams and not me. What little you've told me sounds very nice.”
“They weren't prophetic—or at least they haven't been proved yet,” Lily mused. “So what could it be? Should I take it to Dumbledore?”
“Lils, let it go.”
Lily thought silently to herself, trying to come up with solutions. It wasn't the first time she'd had sex with James—nowhere near—but this time it hadn't felt so… desperate. They knew they had the time to enjoy themselves. He'd apparated home with her and her mum had invited him for dinner, infatuated as her parents had been. When Mr. and Mrs. Evans had gone upstairs to bed, Lily said they were going to watch TV a bit before he left.
She'd only lied a little. She hadn't even meant to, but things happen when you're virtually alone with James and privacy can be attained. Or at least more privacy than they had at Hogwarts.
Had her feelings toward him changed in some way? She turned her head up so she could look as his face, peaceful in that place between sleep and consciousness. His arm was possessive around her but left her enough room to be free if she needed some wiggle room.
No sense denying it, she supposed. The fact he'd “met the parents” indicated something. The fact she hadn't cared if Petunia Dursley (as she'd discovered her sister had married the month before) was there or if she said something rude to him.
Truth was, she knew that was another step in their relationship. They'd never discussed breaking up or seeing other people after school. Technically, the titles weren't even there. James had stayed true to his word. They'd never called each other girlfriend or boyfriend and they'd never felt the pressure of keeping something up.
They had hung out when time allowed them to and if that wasn't for two weeks, it wasn't a big deal.
Now she'd shared her bed with him for the first time (they'd always used his). She was sure it was somehow symbolic, but didn't fool herself into believing that James would see it this way as well. It'd always been her experience that blokes didn't read into stuff nearly as much as girls did.
But it didn't hurt to ask. She wasn't the type of person to guess someone's feelings, especially when it was something as important as this.
“James, have your feelings towards me changed since our last night at Hogwarts?” she asked tentatively. She could almost sense him lifting just one eyelid and staring down at her.
“What the bloody hell are you talking about? If you think that for some reason I don't like you anymore, you're off your rocker. Just so you know.”
“No, that's not what I meant.”
He seemed to ponder the question for a minute, and when his body stiffened just the slightest bit, Lily looked up at him curiously. He was actually blushing.
“Ah, why would you be wondering about that?”
“I thought that might be the reason that my dreams have stopped.”
“What do my feelings have to do with you?”
“Magic is a very complex thing, James. I hardly pretend to understand every facet of it.”
He gave a sort of short nod and muttered something under his breath.
“I didn't catch that, James.”
“Yes, something has changed,” he said in a strained voice. “But that's all I'm saying and there's no need for you to worry your pretty little head about it.” He shut his eyes as if that ended the conversation.
How little he knew.
“What are you talking about?” Lily asked as she sat up, hugging the sheet to her chest. “What's changed? Why aren't you telling me, James?”
“Lily, don't worry about it.”
“Don't you tell me not to worry about it, you ugly little prat,” she snapped, poking his chest with a finger. “You are required”—poke—“to tell me”—poke—“every little sodding thing”—poke, poke, poke—“that pops into your head.”
“According to what?”
“The rules!”
At this, he seemed almost to smirk. “Rules for what, Lily?”
She felt cornered. Well, the rules would depend on what they were exactly, which she didn't know. What could she say now?
“Forget it,” she shrugged. “You're perfectly right.” She lay back down and turned onto her side.
“No, no, no, now you've got me awake,” James chortled, leaning over her. “Rules for what?”
“I said you were right, isn't that enough?”
“No, it's not. The rules state that you're required to tell me every little thing that pops into your head.” He poked her multiple times mockingly.
“So, rules for what, smart ass?” Lily said somewhat irritated, trying to stop his poking. “Stop the poking, James.”
He did, laying his hand on her arm. “Rules for boyfriends and girlfriends.” He gave her a handsome smile, then laughed rudely while she blushed a horrible shade of pink.
“I wasn't aware I'd agreed to be your girlfriend.”
“School's over. A man can only be so patient, my dear.”
Lily snorted, rolling even further away from him. “Patience is not a virtue you ever attained, sorry to break it to you.”
He shrugged, climbing on top of her despite her grimace.
“I can show you just how impatient I can be,” he said in a devilish way, proceeding to kiss her neck and her face. Lily laughed.
Knock, knock, knock.
“Lily, dear?” Her mum rattled her doorknob. “Did you lock it?”
“Shit,” Lily hissed, shoving James off her. With a chaste kiss, he disapparated. Lily took the charm off the room. “Coming, mum! I'm changing.”
She searched in vain for her pajama but couldn't find it anywhere. She walked to her closet and pulled out the first outfit she could find.
Opening the door she asked, “Yes, Mum?”
*~*
“Alright, mate, what'd you do?” Sirius blurted out the moment he saw James. “You look like the cat that swallowed the canary.”
James grinned at his best mates, all three that were there. “I figured something out last night, fellas. It was of the highest importance.”
“Well, why don't you tell us?” Remus said lazily, leaning against Sirius' counter sipping a Guinness at nine in the morning.
“I've decided I'm going to marry Lily.”
There was a strained silence in the room.
“You just graduated yesterday,” Sirius said, almost in a frightened voice. “We haven't finished shagging girls left and right, James, or drinking ourselves into a stupor legally every night, or—”
“I don't want that. Or at least, not as much as you do. I want her.” James took a seat on Sirius' couch. “Let's look at this, shall we? This idiot Dark wizard's going around killing people and we can't seem to stop him. There's no time to waste. I want her, I like being around her, and I love her.”
Sirius looked almost disgusted, Remus looked amused, and Peter looked confused—as usual.
“I love Lily to death, James, but you're just seventeen. How can you expect to marry her so young?” Sirius asked.
James gave him a plain look, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Because I love her.”
He heard Remus snort a bit, and glanced over at him.
“Have you told her that? As far as I know, you guys haven't even made it official yet,” Remus said.
If he wasn't mistaken, James had blushed.
“That's been taken care of. And no, I haven't told her yet. I literally just figured it out last night. She's stopped having her dreams and everything because of it—or so I suspect.”
“Dreams? What dreams?” Peter asked. Sirius threw him a glare. Peter hadn't been clued in on Lily's dreams as the other Marauders had felt that would violate her privacy.
“Don't worry about it.”
*~*
“The dreams have stopped, Vicky,” Lily said over the telephone as she prepared her breakfast. “Or at any rate, I didn't have one last night.”
“That's good, right? You wanted them to stop,” came Vicky's reply.
Lily made a half-sigh, half-irritated noise. “At the beginning, yeah. But that was nearly a year ago, Vic. Now that we're together—oh, speaking of, he called me his girlfriend. Sort of.”
“Sort of?”
“Yeah. He alluded to it.”
“How?”
“Long story. But that's the deal.”
“That's a good thing, right?”
Lily smiled at her eggs. “Yes. That is definitely a good thing. The dreams I'm not so sure about.”
“Lily, what's the worse that could happen? You've got the real live thing right in front of you—what the fuck do you need the dreams for?”
“Yeah, he said that too.”
She could hear Vicky giggling. “You've seen him already today? Must've really liked your parents.”
“Don't be stupid, Vicky. You know exactly what happened last night.”
“Lily, that's sick! Your parents were home!” Vicky gasped. “I cannot begin to tell you how wrong that was on how many levels.”
“They didn't hear anything,” Lily muttered, making sure to keep her voice down so her parents wouldn't overhear from the next room. “Anyway, we hadn't planned on it, it just happened.”
“Oh, you just happened to strip off your clothes and shag?”
“Yes. We were watching the telly. You know how those things go, Vicky… I know you took Jonathan home yesterday and I know you just got back from your flat, you skank.”
There was an offended sound from the other side. “Excuse you, Miss I-Fucked-A-Guy-Who-Wasn't-Officially-My-Boyfriend-Under-My-Parents-Roof-Most-Likely-Multiple-Times.”
“Shove it, Vic.”
Lily rolled her eyes a moment before Vicky replied, because she knew exactly what was coming, what Vicky always replied to that comment.
“How hard?”
*~*
“Lils, you home?”
Lily whipped her head around to look at the glowing fireplace. “I didn't know my fireplace was attached to the Floo Network. Hi, James.”
She sat down in front of the glowing face.
“I did it just for you—just your bedroom's fireplace, however. And there's a safety lock so that your parents don't shit themselves if a head accidentally pops in.”
“How thoughtful of you.”
“I thought so.”
“You didn't have anything planned for tonight, did you?”
“Nope,” Lily shook her head. “Why?”
“Get out your best dress robes. I'd like to take you out to dinner for our first date.”
Lily smiled. “Alright. Seven sound good?”
“Sounds great. I'll ring the doorbell. Later, Lils.”
*~*
A/N: Alright, I had wanted to mention something in the last chapter that I'd forgotten to mention—why didn't Lily and James use Voldemort's name? It's quite a simple thing, but I hardly ever do these sorts of symbolisms, so I just wanted to point it out. While some people might paint Lily and James as indestructible and perfect and just fan-bloody-tastic, I wanted to kind of change that. While I don't think I list either of their faults in specific, I didn't want them to be above using “You-Know-Who” and “He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named”. Even though they would later fight in the Order and they would try to defeat him, who's to say that they were shaking in their panties at the very thought of Voldemort? So, yeah. Just wanted to mention that.
Um… This chappie kind of surprised me. I skipped a lot more time than I'd planned to, but I like the outcome.
Everything kind of surprised me actually. What happened between them, and the whole dreams stopping thing (yeah, don't know how I'll end that, by the way…).
So, review because you love me? You know you do. Might not want to, but you do.
Mucho amor,
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Six: Alibi
By Natali K. A.
Lily laughed, feeling a little light headed from her several glasses of champagne. She'd never been able to hold much alcohol, and champagne was the worst of it.
“The world seems so sparkly,” she sighed, glancing around the nice restaurant. “Don't you think so, James?”
James snickered. “I can't believe you're drunk.”
“I am not drunk,” Lily denied, holding out her glass while James refilled it. “I'm happy.”
“Of course, my dear.” He smirked at her, sipping his own glass of champagne. They looked at each other over their glasses, flirting with their eyes. James set his glass down. “Do your parents expect you home tonight?”
Lily raised an eyebrow. “Well, I'm sure they'll notice if I never show up,” she reasoned. “But I am old enough to make my own decisions, aren't I?”
James nodded. “I want you to come home with me.”
Lily snorted prettily. “I'm sure your parents will definitely guess what we're doing. My parents are a tad bit thick when it comes to my innocence, but yours aren't nearly as dumb.”
James shook his head. “No, that's not what I mean. I want you to come home with me for good.”
Lily was grateful she'd set down her drink just moments before because she lost the ability to grasp things. Had she been standing, she would've probably fainted.
“We just started dating.”
He made an irritated noise before leaning forward and grasping her hand. “Lily, if you believe that I haven't thought of you as my girlfriend or talked about you as my girlfriend for the recent months, you're extremely slow. I told you that because you were pressured and you had N.E.W.T.s. Me? I couldn't honestly care. I'd drop studying to spend time with you anytime.”
“You never study,” she said, trying to change the subject.
“But if I had, I would've stopped for you. Even if I was going to fail the exam, I would've. You can't tell me that you haven't felt a bit exclusive throughout this entire time.”
Lily shrugged. “Course not, but I just… move in with you, James? School just ended yesterday!”
“And tomorrow isn't for sure.” He looked at her with puppy dog eyes.
“I have to think about it,” she blurted out, shaking. “It's a big step. My parents would throw a fit, no matter how much they like you. They don't expect me to move out until I get married, more so now than ever since Petunia lived with Vernon for nearly a year.”
He nodded, twiddling with his knife. “It's not as if I don't plan to take it there.”
“Take what where?”
“Our relationship.”
“Our relationship where? Marriage?”
“Well, yeah. That is why we're dating, isn't it? Trying to figure out if we're compatible or not. Isn't that why people date period?” James asked.
Lily was shocked. “James, not everyone dates to get married or to look for someone to marry! Vicky, for one. She's never going to marry—or so she says, though I know better. She just wants a good time. I have a cousin who uses women like they're a pair of pants he doesn't particularly like. Wham, bam, thank you ma'am.”
“That's them,” James growled. “I thought… Lils, I thought you wanted—”
“I do want to get married,” she interrupted, stuttering. “But this is a bit out of the blue for me! This is our first official date and you're asking me to move in with you! Then you bring up marriage—we're barely out of school. Our seats are still warm there! You might as well get it over with and ask me to marry you.” She huffed, slouching a little.
“Fine,” he said dryly. “Will you marry me?”
“James!”
“What?” he snapped. “I mean it. I want you to marry me, but I figured you didn't want to go there just yet, so I decided to ask you to move in with me instead. That'd satisfy me. For the moment, anyhow.”
“It's not that I don't want to go there, it's just—Well, I don't know exactly what,” she sighed. She reached over and grabbed his hand, squeezing it. “You just sort of surprised me, is all.”
James leaned forward and kissed her. “I know why you didn't dream last night—or I think I do, anyway.”
“Why?” Lily whispered. “Tell me. You wouldn't this morning.”
“Because I realized how much I love you and that I want to marry you. Tomorrow's not guaranteed, Lily. I don't think we should waste another day,” he explained. “Tell me that you don't love me and we'll pretend this conversation never happened.”
His voice sounded so pained when he said that, Lily's heart almost broke for him.
“Don't be ridiculous,” she muttered. “How could you think I didn't love you?”
“Say it,” he said gruffly.
“I love you.” Lily kissed him. “I love you.” She kissed him again and this time he kissed her back.
Someone cleared their throat. They pulled apart to find their waiter waiting with their check.
“Thank you, and I hope you enjoyed your dinner.”
“We did, thanks,” James said, rising. He helped Lily stand up and they walked out of the restaurant together.
After a comfortable silence, James asked, “Will you come home with me tonight? Just to sleepover?”
Lily tore her gaze away from her hometown's closed stores and its dark streets. “What do I tell my parents? I just don't feel comfortable with them knowing that I'm sleeping over at your place.”
“Lily.”
“I'm not trying to hide it, but they're still my parents, James. They're going to look at me with that face and Daddy will never think of me in the same way.” She made a hesitant noise. “I don't think it's that they're ignorant, they just don't have substantial proof, and therefore can't prove it nor fully believe it. This way, they're allowed to remain in their fairytale land.”
James nodded. “Alright then, if it means that much to you.”
“It does.”
“We'll pretend to say goodbye, wait thirty minutes then say that Vicky invited you for a sleepover with a bunch of your Hogwarts friends. I'll be waiting for you in my room and that way my parents won't ever know either.”
Lily didn't reply as they turned onto her walk.
“I'll see you soon,” he whispered, pulling her into a hug. “Don't take too long.”
“I won't,” she promised. “I'm not saying no, by the way. To moving in with you. I just need to think about it.”
“Hmm. See you then. I can disapparate behind that bush over there, right?”
“No, the neighbors from the back can see you if they're upstairs and happen to be looking out the window. Go into the shed. It's partially blocked by a tree.”
“Thanks.”
She stepped into her house to find her parents sitting on the couch watching television.
“Have a fun time, Lily?” her mum asked. “You're home earlier than I thought you would be. It's only 9:30.”
“Didn't have anything else to do,” Lily shrugged. “I'm exhausted anyway. Didn't get much sleep last night.”
“Why?” her dad asked.
Lily was so grateful her back was to them as she hung her coat and a blush crept over her cheeks. “Oh, you know. Anxiety over school being over and all that. Then I woke up early because I'm so used to it.”
“Of course, dear. There's some leftover cookies that I made tonight in the kitchen if you'd like some. Still in the oven.”
“I'll save them for tomorrow morning. I'm stuffed,” Lily said, plopping down on the couch. She really was tired. Not tired enough to stay home but tired nonetheless. She reminded herself she wouldn't be here tomorrow morning.
Oh, well.
“Did you have a nice dinner?”
“Yes. James took me to my favorite place.”
Her dad nodded approvingly. “I like him immensely, Lily. I haven't gotten a chance to ask you yet, but did you mention he was your boyfriend yesterday?”
“No, I didn't. But he is.” She hadn't truly lied. And if she was going to move in with him—which she hadn't decided on yet—she might as well let her parents think they'd been official for a few months now, no matter than they were unofficially official.
She ordered herself to stop thinking because she was only confusing herself.
Lily watched reruns of Fawlty Towers with her parents for about ten minutes before her mum remember she had to tell her something.
“By the way, I think Vicky sent you one of those owl things. It wanted to be let inside, but I'd just mopped the floor. I put him in Saucer's old cage in the backyard with some food. Seemed quite content, too.”
This is the perfect opportunity. Oh, thank you, Vic! Lily thought. She had to restrain herself from jumping up and getting her stuff together. She went out into the back, spotted her old dog's cage and let Vicky's owl Celia out.
“Hey, sweetheart,” she crooned. “Did you know that your Mama just saved my arse? Yeah, she did. Thanks for the note. Hang on while I write something back.”
Hey,
Just thought I'd give you a reason to stay with your lover boy tonight. Make up some excuse that I have boy troubles and I need a friend or some shit like that.
Love,
Your “aching” friend, ha!
“That bitch!” Lily laughed, penning a quick response. “Swears she knows everything.”
She sent Celia off and went back inside.
“Mum, Dad, Vicky's having some boy issues. She asked me to sleep over tonight, so I'm heading over, alright? Don't know when I'll be back.”
“Oh, take Vicky the cookies, then,” her mother said sympathetically. “Send her our love. And why don't you invite her over for dinner tomorrow while you're at it? James, too, if you don't think it'll bother her. We have some of your father's colleagues coming over.”
“Thanks, Mum, will do.” She gave both her parents a kiss and went upstairs to her room to pack the essentials.
Changing into boy-shorts and a matching cami, Lily wrapped herself in a bathrobe and disapparated to James' room.
“Boo,” she said, giggling when he started. He'd been changing into his pajamas.
“There you are,” he grinned. “Great news. Dad took Mum out on one of their random weekend getaways. We have the whole house to ourselves.”
Lily smiled. “Just a coincidence, eh?”
James appeared offended. “Are you accusing me of somehow tweaking the situation to suit my purposes? In which case, you would be correct except that this was, for once, totally coincidental.”
“How convenient.”
“Lils.”
“What?” she asked, even though she knew exactly what was coming.
“I want to show you how much I love you,” he whispered, gently picking her up and walking over to his bed. He lay her down then came above her. “I do.”
“I know. I do, too.”
But my mother told me there was only one way to show a man you love that much how much you love him, she thought to herself. That involves marriage and having a baby. His baby.
I want to have his baby. I want to wait at home for him every day and jump into his arms to welcome him. I want to know his every secret and help him make decisions. I want to support him. But nothing made a man understand love like his child would.
“Let's do it,” she said before she knew she was saying it. Instantly, she knew she couldn't take it back. He would never have let her.
“I'm planning on just that. Be patient.”
“No, I don't mean that. Well, I do, but I mean… I'm saying yes, James.”
“To moving in with me?”
“To marrying you.” There was no turning back. She wouldn't risk turning into a pillar of salt when there was a promise of so much more before her. “This is my yes.”
“No,” he said bluntly.
“What do you mean `no'?” she snapped. “You told me that you—”
“I've got to ask you correctly, Lils! I've got to go to your parents and ask for their permission. I need my father's blessing and to find us somewhere to live. I need a bloody ring and I have to ask you in the most romantic way possible.”
“I don't need any of that.”
“It's what's right.”
Lily scowled. “If you really want to go into detail then, fucking you tonight before we get married isn't `right' either.”
James looked uncomfortable. “I know that.”
“Doesn't stop you.”
“It should and maybe it will.”
“James Potter, I cannot believe you!” Lily shrieked, pushing him off her and standing up. “I come over here dressed like this”—she pushed open her robe—“and you'd better believe that I'm getting some action tonight.” She sniffed.
“Lily,” he said, half-smiling. She allowed him to draw her to him so that she was standing between his legs. He had never gotten around to putting on his pajama top, so his bare chest touched her thinly covered one. “Lily,” he repeated. “It's a touchy situation.”
“What's so damned touchy about it? You want to shag me, don't you?”
“What do you think?”
Lily bit her lip in order to keep from smiling proudly. She felt exactly how much he wanted to sleep with her.
“Then why won't you?”
“It's touchy because I'm battling with myself. Since my family's such an old wizard name, I was brought up in the Old ways. I grew up bowing, standing when women entered the room, giving up my chair to ladies and the elderly, holding doors open, and with the idea that women deserve the very best and it's my duty to ensure they get that and are protected.”
“Then what's the problem here? You sure don't stand every time I enter a room.”
“It's outdated,” James said, brushing it off. “That's not what I mean. It just… well, even though I haven't exactly had any reserve in… having sex with you, it still sort of bothers me—somewhere deep, deep inside my gentlemanly self.”
“You're joking.”
“It's complicated,” he shrugged.
Lily broke out laughing. “I can't believe you.”
“What?”
“You're so silly!” she said, laughing even harder. She kissed his nose. “You're utterly outrageous.” She looked at him somewhat sheepishly. “Does that mean you're not…?”
“Eh, call me a little crazy, and you'd probably be right. But no, we're not. I want to, but we won't.”
“Why?” she asked, genuinely curious.
“Because now you're going to be my wife,” he replied, as if it was the most obvious answer. “Which gives us all the more reason to have our wedding soon because abstinence has never been a joy for me.”
Lily nodded. “Alright.” And she understood. Not the reason behind it, but the why: he felt it was right. “But is it okay if I stay here for the night?”
He beamed at her. “I hadn't realized your leaving was an option.” James scooped her up and lay her down on the bed again. “You do like the left side, right?”
*~*
A/N: Ok, I threw this together quickly because I'm leaving tomorrow for Halloween Horror Nights, even though Wilma's off by the Yucatan Peninsula. I mean, really, why not? So, pray we don't get wiped away by its 150 mph winds. It's moving so slowly too. It's almost agonizing. But yeah.
I know some of you are probably ready to kill me. You're all waiting for some smut, and I just won't give it to you. *sigh* and now this, huh? Yes, I'm sure a few of you are peeved.
But I'll give you a little preview of what is in the next chapter (that is, if I don't get blown away by Wilma. Keep that in mind, very important). James will figure out how he wants to propose—not that he will propose, but that he'll figure out how.
And, ah, shall the dreams return? Could I possibly satisfy your thirst for some smut that way??
Perhaps…
Mwahaha!
Ok, seriously though. I don't do it to annoy you guys. Quite the opposite. This fic had been planned originally so that it would be over by now. I'm trying to elongate the story a little. Hard for me to do, believe me.
For those who expected White Houses last week, sorry. Begging forgiveness, but I just didn't have anything to write about. But now… now I do!
To boot, it was a terribly torturous weekend.
Please review and give me thoughts and praise and tell me how beautiful I am.
Oh, wait. That's in my perfect world. *grin*
Love you all!
Natali K. A.
PS: Shall warn that Caz is my personal assassin, though it was originally projected towards A Budding Romance. I think it can extend to here too. Beware. Lol.
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Chapter Seven: A New Dreamer
By Natali K. A.
James sighed, unable to fall asleep. He'd woken up in the middle of the night to use the toilet, and now he hadn't been able to sleep again. It was probably because he had so much running through his head.
While he was happy that Lily had said yes, he was somewhat disturbed. She had barely thought about it. He supposed that it should bother him that she had to think at all, but he had the strangest feeling that she hadn't actually sat down and thought about it.
Lily had been satisfied with him. Just him—no flowers, no pretty words, no bended knee. He'd asked and she'd replied, albeit in his favor. Almost businesslike.
Not that he didn't think she had feelings for him. He glanced down at the woman in his arms and felt a pang of longing so incredible. Maybe it hadn't been such a great idea to withhold sex from her; he was suffering for it.
He hadn't had any problems making love to her before she'd conceded to becoming his wife. Damn it, it was part of his little plan to lure her in. As much as women thought that men were led by their cocks (which they were) they were also quite partial to sex themselves. It wouldn't have been futile to give her such great sex she wouldn't have been able to resist.
It was a bit evil of him, but he would've done it in a snap.
But he was enough. That thought was a little scary. James had been expecting to have to catch her by surprise in such an utterly romantic way that she could not have said no. Yet all he'd done was ask and she had been content with just him.
And now he still had to come up with that out-of-this-world proposal, and hopefully soon because he was already horny. He'd just shagged her last night and he already craved more.
He leaned down and kissed her temple. His beautiful little addiction.
It sometimes scared him how tiny she was. It was true that he was a bit taller than most men and she wasn't a midget or anything, but she didn't even reach his shoulders. Her weight couldn't pass 115, though his judgment couldn't really be trusted. He couldn't guess weight. But whenever he lifted her, she was light as a feather.
He had asked her once, early in their relationship, why it was that girls always liked their men to be taller. He'd been joking somewhat, that the only reason Lily liked him was because he was so tall.
But she'd honestly thought about it for a minute and had come up with a surprisingly accurate answer.
“Well, I suppose it's a question of feeling protected,” she had said, staring into the common room fire, thinking. “It's just natural that someone bigger than us would make us feel protected. I think that's important in a relationship. I know I wouldn't want to think that I'd have to fend for myself if something bad happened. But that's the superficial reason.
“I think it's also trust. It's knowing that he could hit you or that he could force you, but also knowing that he wouldn't ever even consider it. He has a physical advantage but you trust that he won't actually act on it. Or at least against you,” she had finished, turning back to look at him.
James had then laughed a little—she had taken it very seriously. But he saw now what she meant. The truth of the matter was that he could kill her twenty different ways in under thirty seconds if he'd had the desire to do so. But that wasn't, of course, the case.
He shut his eyes, holding Lily even closer to him. In her sleep, she snuggled down and sighed. He could tell she wasn't dreaming.
*~*
“James…?”
James looked up from his meal inquiringly.
“Remember how you proposed to me?” Lily asked softly, cocking her head to the side.
James snorted. “Lils, as if I could forget. I was so nervous.”
Lily smiled. “Yeah. Your hands were sweaty.”
He raised a brow. “You'd be nervous too.”
“Yes, I know. But you knew I'd say yes.”
“Nothing's guaranteed in life, Lily, except birth and death.”
She nodded, pushing her carrots around on her plate. “You'd dropped my house one day when I was out with one of my hometown friends. I'd wondered why my mum was crying.”
James grinned. “She almost choked me with her hugs. I remember thinking that it was as if you were some ugly chick that no one else would marry and I was doing them the biggest favor…”
Lily threw a bread roll at him. “Very funny.”
“You didn't let me finish! It's very obvious that you're not undesirable.”
Lily continued to play around with her carrots. “She'd given me the lame excuse that she'd been cutting onions. Mum hates onions. Dad and I used to kid around that she was killed by a giant onion in a past life.”
“Can't say I blame her,” James grimaced. “Onions are evil.”
“You like my onion soup.”
“Notice that I pick around the onions.”
Lily rolled her eyes. “Daddy gave me this big hug before you came to pick me up, too. Said I looked stunning and why didn't I go put on Grandma's pearl earrings?”
“You were, and those earrings did contrast nicely with your coloring. You looked like an angel, Lils,” James sighed. “I almost backed out of it. You'd intimidated me.”
“You're joking!” Lily laughed. “Then we left for Vicky's wedding—I told you she'd get married to him, but no, you thought you knew more.”
“How was I supposed to know? She'd always been so bloody adamant about staying single, and then she ups and gets married. That was the shortest engagement I've ever heard of, too.”
“Don't be ridiculous. Two weeks for Vicky is a miracle. She's the sort that likes to have her mind made up quickly and she hardly ever regrets a decision. They're still happily married aren't they, and they'd only met three months before the wedding.”
“She's amazing. Yes, I get it.” James skewered a piece of chicken and popped it into his mouth. “I could barely breathe, you know. After the ceremony when the removed everyone to the banquet hall for dinner I thought I was going to be sick.”
“Then you stood up after we ate and asked for everyone's attention. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what you were going to do. You started saying—no, babbling, you hardly made sense—about how happy you were for Vicky and that she'd inspired you. Then you were mumbling and no one could hear what you were saying.”
“Yes, I remember feeling utterly rejected when you just looked at me blankly. I stepped down then and resolved to pretend as if nothing had happened. I hadn't realized I'd had one too many glasses of whiskey.”
Lily smiled lovingly at him. “Then our song came on and you didn't want to dance. You were scarcely talking. I thought I'd done something to upset you.”
James nodded, remembering. “Some bloke asked you to dance, you asked if I minded, I said I didn't, and you went to dance with him to our song. I felt homicidal.”
“You sure did look it when you interrupted us about half way into the song and didn't mince words when you told him to… what was it exactly?” Lily giggled a little. “'Take your fucking hands off my girlfriends, I do mind, don't you have the brains to figure out that you don't ask some other guy's girl to dance if you want to keep your manhood in one piece? Let me take care of that misunderstanding then.' I was utterly humiliated when I found out he headed a major organization.”
“Shouldn't have touched you.”
“You said it was alright!”
“He should've known it wasn't.”
“And then you remember what happened?” Lily whispered, leaning forward so that their heads were only inches apart. “Remember how you asked me to marry you?—for the second time, supposedly.”
“I believe I forced you to say yes.”
“Told me it wasn't an option.”
“You were so confused.”
“I thought you were drunk. You were, but I thought you were seriously so.”
James chuckled. “The look on your face, Lily, when you finally got what I was saying… Priceless. Then you had to make all that commotion.”
“You'd proposed—of course I'm going to make a bloody commotion! You know girls squeal.”
“If I hadn't known it there, I sure know it then.” James wondered why Lily had brought up the day of their engagement, then remembered the date. “We got engaged a year ago today, didn't we?”
“We did,” she nodded. “It's been on my mind all day. What stands out the most was how hot you were and what a good shag we had in the ladies' bathroom at that banquet hall. Vicky nearly threw us out, remember?”
“You were damned loud.”
“You were damned good. It's your fault.”
He kissed her. “I'm not much for remember dates, you know me.”
“You're full of it! You still the remember when our first date was,” Lily said, standing and taking their plates to the kitchen.
“You don't?” he asked in a wounded voice.
“No. I've got enough on my mind without all those silly little anniversaries. Once a year is fine with me, thanks. Dessert, my love?”
“Yes,” James replied, following her into the kitchen of Godric's Hollow.
“What would you like?” Lily asked, surveying their choices. “Ice cream, strawberry pie that Mum sent over, biscuits… I think we've got grapes…”
“None of that has what I want.”
Lily turned around, unaware of the look he was giving you. “Oh, what do you want then? I could make your favorite—”
“My favorite's already made.”
“What is it you want, James?”
She finally noticed the look he was giving her, and she smiled somewhat proudly. “If you insist.” She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his middle.
James carried her up the stairs to have his dessert, just as he liked to.
*~*
“James, are you gonna wake up or not?”
James slowly woke up, feeling something heavy on him. Well, his first thought was that a certain part of him was a little painful and that something was definitely making him feel good. It was the next second that he realized that Lily was straddling him, still in nothing but her boy shorts and camisole.
He grabbed his glasses and shoved it onto his face. “What are you doing?” he asked groggily. He groaned as she kissed him and sat back. “You're killing me.”
“Hey, I'm not the one who doesn't want to have sex. You were sleeping like that, by the way,” she grinned evilly. “I couldn't resist torturing you.”
“You're Satan.”
She laughed, head thrown back. “I know, I'm devilish for sure. Thought I'd wake you up before I left to invite you to dinner tonight. My parents are having clients over or colleagues or something. I wasn't paying much attention. Will you come?”
“If you don't get off of me, I'm afraid I will come.”
“James, that's disgusting!” she shrieked, snickering anyway. “But really, do you want to come? Just so I can tell my mom to set another place at the table. Vicky will be there, once I tell her about it.”
“I'm there.” He tried to push her off. “But honestly, if you don't get off—”
“Go take a cold shower.” She leaned forward and kissed him again, disappearing with a pop moments later.
James took a deep breath. “She'll kill me, I'm sure of it.”
He let the dream wash over him. Had he just had the same type of dreams that Lily had been having for nearly a year until just two nights ago?
He grinned. On the bright side, he finally knew what it was like to see Lily and him shag in a dream. They were damn sexy.
He put his hands behind his head and thought about what had happened in the dream. He wasn't sure it actually predicted the future—from the little Lily had told him about the events in her dreams, they'd never come dream. Except for them dating, naturally.
Then it hit him. He knew how he'd propose. He didn't know when, but he knew how.
And that was the first step.
“Now that that's settled, it's time for a cold shower.”
*~*
“Vic? You here?” Lily asked, having just apparated to Vicky's house.
“In the bathroom. I'm fresh out of the shower.”
Lily walked into her best mate's bathroom and instantly gave her a giant hug. “You're a genius. Thanks for the alibi.”
Vicky snickered. “My pleasure. Here, braid my hair, will you?”
Lily grabbed her brush and began to dress Vicky's hair. “You won't believe though, what I have to tell you. It's great.”
“Yeah?”
“Mmm hmm. He asked me to move in with him last night at dinner.”
Vicky gasped with delight, turning to face Lily, causing her to lose her place in the process of braiding her hair. Lily took hold of her head and turned it again, to start all over again.
“What'd you say?” Vicky asked.
“I told him I'd think about it. Then I said that he might as well ask me to marry him—”
Vicky whipped her around and once more Lily lost grip of the braid.
“You told him what, Lils?! Are you out of your bloody mind?”
Lily turned her head again and for the third time got to work on Vicky's hair
“Stop moving. Yes, I said that. And then he told me that that's what he really wanted to do, but he didn't think I'd be up to doing so. Then he took me home and I was going to go to his house while my parents thought I was at your place. So you're some sort of Seer, I swear.”
“I am.”
“Well, I get to his room wearing my adorable lilac boy shorts and matching camisole—”
“Great color on you.”
“—and we start kissing and then I blurt out yes.”
“Yes to what?”
“Yes, I want to marry him.” Prepared for Vicky's head to turn this time, she got an extra tight grip on the braid and refused to let go.
“Ow!”
“Don't turn!”
“Fine. I can't believe you said that, Lily.” Vicky was quiet for a moment before her eyes got as wide as saucers. “…Does that mean you're engaged?”
“No.”
“No? I don't get it.”
“He said no, he wanted to ask me in `the right way',” Lily scowled. “Then you won't believe what he did.”
“I haven't believed this story ever since he asked you to move in with him—which I'm all for. Lie to the parental units and say you moved in with me. You know, I'm such a good alibi and all.”
“Don't think he's up for it. He denied me sex.” She put the rubber band in Vicky's hair just in time for Vicky to whip her head around so fast she fell off the toilet she'd sat on.
“Fuck.”
*~*
A/N: Am finally going to Halloween Horror Nights. Will try to post for those who read A Budding Romance/White Houses but I'm not making any promises.
Half hour late, got caught up on livejournal. Lol. And I spent the day at my best friend's house.
So. Yeah. Laters.
Oh, liked writing this chapter. Cuz yeah, James had a dream. Originally I'd planned on including smut here, but I think I'll wait. Heh heh! Also, that quote from Lily about why girls like their guys to be tall, I came up with that. A guy friend had asked me one night and yeah. Decided to include it.
Love you all!
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Eight: Soothing Motion
By Natali K. A.
“Jack, Will, David, George, you know my daughter Lily. These are her friends Victoria and James,” Mr. Evans said, introducing everyone as the dinner party began. “Lily, dear, these are my colleagues, whom I'm sure you remember. Except for David, he's a recent addition.”
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance,” Lily smiled, wishing she'd found some way to get out of this dinner. She'd forgotten how much she'd hated these things; they were an utter bore.
“Food's ready if you would like to be seated, gentlemen,” Mrs. Evans said, entering the front parlor. “Lily, you and your friends will be sitting on the left side.”
“Alright, Mum,” Lily said, taking James' proffered arm to go into the dining room for dinner. Vicky grabbed onto his other arm.
He had definitely done this sort of thing before.
Vicky, of course, knew how these things went. Her mother had divorced her father when Vicky was three and had married a muggle who ran a major company. A dinner party this size was a piece of cake for her.
But Lily had wondered whether to point out a few things to James or not. Of course, she knew that the Potters held a high position in pureblood wizard society, but there were probably a few differences along with the similarities to muggle and wizard parties.
So far so good, however.
The dinner was, as she'd predicted, a boring affair but with very good food—the Evanses had had the same French housekeeper for over ten years now, and they'd never been let down. Lily's mum had been her usual thoughtful self when she'd set up the places so that the females were on one side with the males on another. It made for more interesting conversation.
And so, while the three women discussed the expected fall fashions, Lily eavesdropped on the conversation the men were conducting—something about horses. She felt an odd pride in the fact that James was her boyfriend and how completely perfect he was. She could tell her father was content that James could hold his own down at a formal gathering, no matter the size.
“Try not to gaze adoringly, Lily,” Vicky whispered in her ear, sounding slightly disgusted. “It doesn't become you to be the simpering girlfriend.”
Lily narrowed her eyes slightly but smiled anyway.
“Lily, what do you make of it?” James asked her.
“I'm sorry, sweetheart, I wasn't listening.”
“Five Arabians for sale. Not a bad price either. Not the cheapest but probably worth it. I'm considering buying them from Will there.”
Lily raised her eyebrow. “And put them where, James?”
“I'd have to buy a big house with stables,” he shrugged. “We could go horseback riding every morning on our very own horses.”
“You'd never get her off,” Mrs. Evans laughed. “Lily's happiest childhood memories were at our cousins' where we'd visit during the summer. They own a stud.”
“I say, are you engaged?” asked the fat, sweaty man that was Jack. He turned to the older people. “These young things keep getting married earlier and earlier. They should learn to enjoy their lives for a while first.”
“In the process of an engagement,” James replied. “I haven't formally asked yet.”
Lily could feel her cheeks heat up and had to fight the urge to roll her eyes when she saw her parents give each other a knowing, pleased look.
*~*
“The fat man was quite irritating,” Vicky said the instant they walked through the back doors. She reached into her purse and took out a faggot and lighter.
“He's not so bad. Just a little… distasteful,” James shrugged, automatically putting his arm around Lily's waist. “I can't imagine what he was thinking when he put on that powder blue suit. It clashes horribly with his coloring.”
“I'm not too sure anything would look good on old Jack,” Lily snickered. “I've never liked him. I swear to you that he tried to make a pass at me when I was fourteen. And he says that we `young things' should live our lives first.”
“What'd he say?” Vicky asked.
“It had been about four years since he'd last seen me—I'd gone away to Hogwarts—and he said I was growing up very nicely and was I considering marriage? That was the long and short of it, anyhow.”
“Gross,” Vicky muttered, blowing out a puff of smoke. She turned to the couple and gave them a sassy look. “So, when are you going to formally propose, James m'boy?”
“It's a surprise.”
“No doubt. If in any way, shape, or form your plan involves tying Lily up and gagging her, I'm there to help. Remember that,” she winked, putting out the cigarette. “Well, I've got to go.”
“So early?” Lily asked. “It's not even ten.”
“Yes, I know. Johnny wants to take me out,” Vicky sighed. “It's so demanding to be a girlfriend. Actually, I'm meeting his parents, even though he thinks I don't know.”
“How did you find that out?” James asked.
“Ran into his mum at his flat the other day. She'd been there reading on his couch waiting to go out to lunch with him and I'd popped in to pick up the chainsaw he let me borrow.”
“Why does he have a chainsaw?” Lily asked.
“Oh, I don't know,” Vicky huffed. “He's such a packrat, it's so bloody annoying. Something about the price being too good to pass up. But when I used it, the thing tried to lift me up in the air so I think it's some sort of illegal form of traveling that happens to double as a chainsaw.”
“I don't want to know,” Lily muttered. “So what did she say?”
“Oh, the usual. `I can't wait until I can get to know you better at dinner later this week.' Seems lovely and eager to get to know me,” Vicky replied, kissing Lily's cheek and then James'. “Ta-ta, darlings.” She disapparated.
James led her over to the wooden swing where Lily used to swing when she was younger. It was just wide enough to two children to sit side by side; for them to fit, Lily had to sit in the space between his legs and lean on him. One of his legs was brought up so the knee hung over the back, the other foot touching the ground so he could gently rock them.
“You look beautiful,” he murmured, kissing her temple.
“I hate this dress, but it's the only one that covers my cleavage. I'd rather not give Jack a reason to goggle. I feel ten in it.”
“You definitely do not look ten,” he chuckled. “Then again, you'd look ravishing in a dirty dish rag, wouldn't you?”
“You'd like that. A dish rag only covers so much.” She turned a little to look at him. “Are you really going to buy those horses?”
“Do you want me to?”
“It's up to you—it's your money.”
“It'll be our money soon.”
“But at the moment it's still just yours.”
“I don't think of it like that. In my head, you're already my wife. So if I call you that, don't be alarmed.”
She smiled into the dark night. “I thought men were supposed to be afraid of commitment.”
“It'd hardly be a bother to fuck you, Lily.” He hugged her tighter, pushing off the ground with a little more power. “So?”
“So what?”
“Do you want me to buy them?”
“It's up to you.”
“Do you not want me to buy them?”
“No.”
“Then I'll buy them.”
Lily leaned her head back with a little nod and shut her eyes. It was a little nippy outside, but she didn't feel cold at all with his arms wrapped around her as they were.
“Did you see my parents when you mentioned that you hadn't formally asked me to marry you yet?” she giggled. “They looked as if they'd just gotten me to marry the Prince or something.”
“I was too busy watching Vicky sniggering and choking on her peas,” James said amusedly. “I like her.”
“I'm glad. You're going to be seeing a lot of her. I give her six months and she's married to Jonathan. I know she acts like it's the biggest pain to do all of these `girlfriend' things, as she terms them, but she loves every second of it. She gushed about him the other day. I almost fell out of my chair.”
“She's very level-headed and practical. You've got to give that to her.”
“I think it's that she's a tad cynical about life,” Lily said. “Her parents divorced when she was so young, you know. And her dad hasn't spoken to her for about twelve years. I'm not so sure her faith in good men is all that high.”
“She'll be fine,” James told her soothingly. “She doesn't need any man.”
“I know, but I still worry about her. She's not bitter or scarred or anything nearly so dramatic, but it makes me a little sad that she finds it so hard to just let herself love.”
They fell into a thoughtful silence and it was about twenty minutes before James spoke up.
“We should double date soon.”
But there wasn't a reply from his love. It was then he noticed her breathing had become deep and even.
He sighed. “My little addiction… You fell asleep on me. How rude.” James did not move, but instead kept swinging and lay his head on hers, just letting himself enjoy the evening with the most important person in his life.
A few minutes later, he could tell she was dreaming. Oh. That would explain a lot…
*~*
Lily turned the corner and walked towards the Charms room. She was nearly fifteen minutes early, and she knew it. But since Vicky hadn't been feeling so great and she'd finished eating, the redhead had decided to get a head start and just get there early. Perhaps talk to the professor about an extension on that essay…
“You're certainly here early.”
She looked up to find James leaning against the door frame.
“Decided to get here a few minutes before and talk to the professor about something.”
“She's still at lunch.”
“Oh.” Lily leaned on the doorway as well, across from him. “What about you? Shouldn't you be wreaking havoc off with the rest of your mates somewhere?”
He shrugged. “I wasn't interested in what they're doing today. Besides they've got a free period now and I don't. Most likely I would've been late.”
She nodded. There was an awkward silence then, as their eyes glanced at everything except each other.
“You look nice today, Lily.”
“Thank you,” she smiled. “I got my hair cut yesterday. You don't think my bangs are too short?”
“They're perfect,” he assured her. “They always are.”
Her stomach did a little flip flop as her cheeks flooded with color. “You need a haircut yourself,” she giggled, pointing. “Though I don't suppose that has ever really helped, has it?”
“To my annoyance, no,” he sighed. “But I accepted the unruliness of my hair years ago. What else could I have expected? I got it from my father. My mother, of course, has the best hair ever. But that's life for you. Thankfully, it hasn't damaged my self esteem.”
Lily nodded. There was another awkward pause as they thought of things to talk about. “Did you have a nice time in Hogsmeade yesterday?” she asked finally.
“Nice enough.”
“Just? You sound a little let down.”
“I am. I was looking for you.” He halted just long enough to savor her cute blush. “What about you?”
“It wasn't a bad time. I spent more money than I'd intended to, however. I'm waiting for the reply to the letter I sent to my parents asking for more. No doubt my dad will chastise me about learning to stay on a budget and send me twice as much as before. He hasn't figured out how much galleons are yet, compared to pounds.”
“And you haven't bothered to correct him,” James chuckled. “Right?”
“Right-o.”
“Were you looking for me?”
“I shouldn't have to answer that.”
“But you do, since I asked. And if you don't answer I'll have to assume that you were and that you're embarrassed to admit it.”
“And if I admit it verbally?”
“You're only able to hold your head up a little higher.”
Lily laughed. “Very well, to hell with my pride. Yes, I was looking for you. I remember you'd promised me a drink at the Three Broomsticks.”
“I did,” he affirmed. “I suppose,” he sighed dramatically, pushing himself off the frame to lean towards her, “that next time we'll just have to go together as to not lose each other.”
“I suppose so,” she grinned.
“It's a deal, then. We'll work out the details later.” The falling of footsteps could be heard on the stairs—they were about to be joined by someone. With a surge courage he didn't have, James leaned forward and kissed her cheek fleetingly just as the Charms professor came into view.
“After you,” he smiled, holding the door open for her and then the professor. He gave himself a mental pat on the back because he knew he'd done something right—whatever that had been. She was looking at him with a contented expression…
Always good news.
*~*
“James, dear? Is Lily asleep?” Mrs. Evans asked, walking toward the swing and wrapping her shawl tighter around her. “A bit chilly, eh?”
“Yes, it is. She fell asleep in the middle of a conversation and I didn't have the heart to move her,” he responded. “I'll just carry her up to her room.”
Mrs. Evans nodded, but James could feel he wanted to say something to him.
“It was surprising news to hear that you and Lily have talked about marriage,” she began uncomfortably. “Jack, of course, has never been one of my favorite people because of his stupidity and all around… er, `grossness', I believe Lily calls it. But I feel unexplainable gratitude towards him for asking such a rude question even when he saw quite clearly that Lily was not wearing an engagement ring.”
“People are different. I don't think he was being rude exactly.”
“I concur. But the fact of the matter remains that no doubt you two shall be making an announcement soon.”
“I want to see Mr. Evans sometime next week to ask for his blessing to marry his daughter,” James stated, knowing that was what she'd come outside to hear.
She smiled. “That's delightful, dear. Drop by whenever you'd like. But do give me a heads up so I can bake you something. Or so Laura can, anyway. I'm a terrible cook,” she confided. “Why don't you grab Lily there and you can take her up to her room?”
He did just that, careful not to wake her.
“I'll say my adieus now, as I'll just disapparate from her room. Tell Mr. Evans a good evening and that I'll see him soon.”
“I'll make sure to. Would you like to take home some sugar biscuits? They're delicious.”
“I'd like that very much.”
Lily's mum went into the kitchen and came out with a package two minutes later. With a little hug, she bade him goodnight and he started up the stairs.
He pushed open her door and shut it with his shoulder. Gently, he lay her on her bed under the covers, making sure to take off her shoes. He would have undressed her and placed her in pajamas as well, only he couldn't figure out how to undo her dress.
Complicated things, dresses.
“'Night, Lily,” he whispered, bending down to kiss her lips. She made a humming sound and moved a little but didn't wake.
He disapparated, package of sugar biscuits in his hands.
*~*
A/N: “Can I get another amen? AMEN!” -Sorry, am listening to Green Day. Anyhow, I've been positively dying to get that little scene in the doorway down for weeks now—inspired from real life. Not me, of course, as my love life is nonexistent. But my best friend had that happen to her, and it was just delicious to hear about (I wasn't actually there to witness it) and I loved it so much I had to put it in one of my stories! Naturally, I tweaked it a bit (they definitely did not talk about what James and Lily talked about) to fit my own personal wants and desires, but yeah.
Also… Well, that's it, isn't it?? This took me awhile longer to write, even though I already knew what I wanted to say. I can't really explain it.
And I've got a yearbook deadline tomorrow that I really should work on… Hah.
Thank you, everyone, for your reviews. I can't tell you how much I love receiving them. It's almost silly, but I adore reading what you think.
I think… Uh, maybe another couple chapters? I know—I keep saying that and it goes on even longer, but… I don't know. I can't figure out how I want to end it. Actually, that's a lie. I know exactly how it'll end and what the last line is. But I have to get there first (reminds me of A Budding Rose, where me and Rosie had had the last chapter—or the proposal, anyhow—down for ages before I actually got there).
I'd also like to point out that Lily had a dream again! Why? Oh, no idea. But I couldn't figure out another way to incorporate that doorway thing. And for the first time, it's about a past point in their relationship that never happened. I wonder why?? I'll let you know when I come up with it.
Much love,
Natali K. A.
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Disclaimer: Ah… Part of this was taken from “Butterfly Kisses” by Bob Carlisle. Naturally, it has a totally different meaning. But I was writing this while this song came on. And I couldn't resist. My tribute to one of the most beautiful father/daughter songs ever.
Chapter Nine: The Role Of A Father
By Natali K. A.
Lily woke up the next morning with the sunlight straight in her eyes. How odd, she always closed the curtains before she went to sleep. It was then that she realized she was still wearing the dress from the night before.
Had she been to drunk to even undress?
Ah, no. She'd fallen asleep on James—for some odd reason she couldn't remember.
The dream.
Lily blinked a few times at her ceiling, slowly but surely recalling every detail from her dream.
What did it mean, that she was having dreams again? Hadn't they gone away? She was thoroughly frustrated and decided that it was definitely too early to be thinking—six-thirty in the morning was not a good time to sleep.
She stumbled down to breakfast, not even bothering to change out of her dress. She'd just hop in the shower after eating and drinking some of her tea. As it was, she could barely put one foot in front of the other.
“Good morning, sweetie,” Mrs. Evans said, bringing Lily her mug. “Are eggs and porridge alright?”
Lily grunted, drowning herself in tea. It could never be said that she was a morning person. Her father chuckled from behind his morning paper.
“Can't see why you're complaining. You've slept more than both of us.”
Lily glared at him. “Not a morning person.”
“Don't know why. You used to be up at dawn when you were little. Just like Petunia.”
“Then I had the sense to become as different as I could. Who wants to be like Petunia?”
“Lily, enough,” Mrs. Evans clucked. “Incidentally, Petunia's coming over this morning with her Vernon. She'd like you to meet him, so go on and shower and—why are you still in that dress?”
Ignoring her mum's question Lily sat upright, eyes on fire. “I won't meet him and I highly doubt that Petunia wants me to. No, I know exactly what happened!” She slammed her mug down and stood up. “Petunia said she wanted to come over for breakfast so Vermin or whatever his name is could regal you with talk of—what was it, drills? And when you told her that was fine and no problem, she asked if I was here! You told her I would be and when she told you to get rid of me you refused.” She glared angrily at both her parents. “Tell me that's not what happened!”
Mrs. Evans avoided Lily's eyes. “It's not. His name is Vernon.”
Lily softened a little. She knew it hurt her mother a lot that her daughters didn't get along with each other, but it couldn't be helped, could it?
“I'm sorry. But I just can't,” she sighed. “I'm going to take a shower and then I'm leaving to Vicky's or something.”
“Or to James and your new family?” Mrs. Evans asked with her back to the room, sniffling. “Are you in such a hurry to leave us?”
“Of course not, Mum. I just—”
“You can't have been dating him that long! Suddenly you're talking about marriage and then it'll be babies and then I'll never see you and then what?”
Lily looked to her father for help, but he'd sided with his wife.
“How long have you two been dating?”
Her vision blurred with tears and she said tremblingly, “No, I'm not hearing this. He's such a great man—”
“So was Hitler. A cruel, evil man, but great nonetheless.”
She didn't reply—how dare he compare James to Hitler? Lily hurriedly headed for her room, deciding she didn't want to hear anymore of it.
“Lily, come back here, you know I didn't mean it like that,” Mr. Evans said, cowering at the glare he received from his wife. But Lily's footsteps only kept retreating.
“I don't think we should've started this,” Mrs. Evans said. “We were engaged when I was sixteen and you were twenty. Lily's much more mature than we were at that age.”
“Doesn't matter. The times've changed, dear. I just wish she'd think about this. Suddenly she comes home and she's ready to get married? How many of our friends regret marrying the first person they fell in love with?”
His wife didn't reply.
“Even we've had rough patches,” he continued. “Tell me you've never thought that if only you'd waited—”
“You have the most amazing ability to say the wrong thing at the wrong time,” she interrupted in clipped tones, throwing the dish towel at him. “Is that how you feel?!”
“No, of course not! But it's just—”
Only he didn't get a chance to finish. His wife had left the room to head for Lily's.
Once Mrs. Evans was there, she knocked lightly and entered. Lily was busy brushing out her hair, having undone it from it's bun from the night before.
“I'm sorry. We adore him and you know that. We're just a little shocked. I don't want you to make a mistake, Lily. It's a lifelong decision. You can't just up and get a divorce when you're bored of him.”
Lily glared at her in the vanity mirror, brushing with greater force.
“He appears to be a very nice young man, but what if he has some hidden undesirable quality? What if he's abusive, what if he doesn't want children, what if he's a drinker, what if he's a gambler, what if he cheats, what if—”
“More evidence you don't know him at all. Forgive me if I'm in love with a perfect man.”
“No one is perfect, Lily.”
“I've never heard you complain about my father.”
“I didn't think it was any of your business,” her mother said, resting her hands on Lily's shoulders. “But if you want some examples, so be it. Your father wanted to divorce me.”
A cold vise gripped Lily's chest. When had that happened?
“Early in our marriage, we'd had trouble conceiving and he felt that it was my fault and cause for divorce. We are, as you've noticed, a bit old to be the parents of an eighteen-year old. But we made it through. It's those kind of selfish desires, however, that ruin a marriage. You can't tell me you know everything about him.”
“I know what I need to know, including his bad qualities. I spent six years fighting with him. I know he loses his temper rarely, but when he does it's something to fear. I know he's caring but cold and cruel to those who aren't worthy of his care. I know he's ruthless when it comes to defeating someone. I know—”
“I'm not asking you to list them for me. I'm not saying he's a bad man. If you know for sure that he will be all you need in a husband, then that's all I need. You tell your father and me if you want and concede to marry him, and you have our blessing.” She turned around and left the room.
Lily shut her eyes, shaking. Her anger was incredible—but not as powerful as her love and gratitude for her parents. With maturity comes understanding. With understanding, you learn to forgive. She couldn't punish her parents for being truthful with her because they cared.
But she didn't have a doubt in her mind as to what her answer would be when it came time to tell them whether or not she wanted to marry James.
That would never mature or change.
*~*
Early next week, James went to the Evans household at a time he knew she was out of the house. He seemed cool and confident to any random passerby, as if he had nothing in the world to worry about.
But under his carefree façade, he was worried and shaky and… nervous.
“I'm here to ask for your permission to marry your daughter. I'm here to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. I would be most grateful if you would give us your blessing to wed. Please let me tie the knot already because I need to shag your daughter very badly. It would mean a lot to us if we knew that you approved of our union, so I'd like to ask for your blessing. Yes, I'd love a bottle of vodka, and while you're at it, could you giving me your daughter's hand in marriage?” James practiced, trying to find exactly the right way to say it.
Only he still hadn't found one by the time Mrs. Evans had opened the door.
“James! Come in, dear. I've just set lunch out. You do like chicken pot pie, don't you?”
“This is strictly business, Mrs. Evans,” James joked—somewhat.
After a short lunch, Mr. Evans and James went into the former's study—at the latter's request.
“Now, James, I know exactly what you're here to say,” Mr. Evans began, taking a decanter from the rolling bar and offering James a glass. He refused. “There are not many things I know for sure. Two are this: she was sent to me from Heaven and she's my little girl. No matter what anyone says, she will always be my little precious gift from heaven.
“I watched her grow up. I've changed her diapers, had to deal with her first bra shopping trip—that was horrific. I've watched my little girl cry when some idiot bloke broke her heart.
“I have been so proud of Lily. She's looking like her mum more and more every day—beautiful and perfect and… Lily. She was what Petunia couldn't be to us—a loving child. Petunia's always resented us because we couldn't just stop at her.” He took a big drink and continued.
James sat there, fingers woven together.
“The years go by like the wind—you blink and it's just gone.” He snapped to emphasize. Mr. Evans leaned forward toward James. “She is going to change her name—most likely to Potter—and I will have to walk her down the aisle to give her to some other man. You cannot have any idea how hard that is for a father to accept.”
James didn't reply—he didn't know. He probably wouldn't until—if—he had a daughter.
“The very first time I held her, she grabbed my pointer finger”—he held it up for James to see—“and smiled. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and to this day brings tears to my eyes.
“So when you come to me, asking for my blessing to take my place in Lily's life, you can't fathom how much I desire to say no and lock her up, away from any man so he won't take her.” Mr. Evans sighed and shut his eyes. “Ask me.”
James, a little intimidated and quite afraid he'd actually say no (but who really says no?!), gave his hopefully future father-in-law a moment to regain composure. Then he asked the question that was the sole purpose of his visit.
“Will you let me marry and love your daughter?”
It hung in the air, without a response of any kind. James was almost scared to hear what would come out of the other man's mouth, but forced himself to keep looking and listening. He would have to hear it sometime.
“Tell me why. Why should I let you—a man I haven't known for that long—marry my daughter?”
Well, if that didn't just catch James off guard!
He blinked a couple times. “I should think that would be obvious. I love her. A man is born to grow up, leave his parents, and dedicate himself to his partner.”
“It takes more than love, my boy,” Mr. Evans sighed woefully, refilling his glass. “What if you discover that ten years from now you get bored of the same old routine. Marriage isn't a simple thing. It takes a lot of time and hard work and… just stuff.”
James considered Lily's father for a moment before responding with the only answer he could come up with—the only one, he felt, that was actually true.
“I will do anything to keep her happy and not a day will go by that I won't love her. It would be a foolish and stupid thing for me to promise that we'll never have disagreements—bloody hell, we argue all the time. But I can promise that the final outcome will be for her good, even if it means sacrificing myself in some way.”
Mr. Evans nodded slowly, sipping his vodka again. “Hmm.” Nodding some more, he set down his glass and stood, James following suit. He stuck out his hand which James took.
“So long as I'm living, if I hear you harm her in any way, I will hunt you down. Otherwise, it would be my greatest pleasure to call you my son-in-law.”
James could feel his face split into an idiotic grin and he pumped his hand enthusiastically.
Now all he had to do was propose. Simple, right? Huh. Yeah.
*~*
Lily sat cross-legged on Vicky's bed, staring at the floor.
“You do know what he's doing, don't you?” Vicky asked, crimping her hair with her hands.
“What? Wait, who?”
“James, you twit!”
“Oh, him. No, what?”
Vicky raised her eyebrow. “You really are a nincompoop, Lils.”
“I thank you for your compliment. What's he doing though?”
“Did he asked you what you were going to do today?”
“Yes.”
“Did you tell him?”
“Yes.”
“Did he ask you how long you'd be out and if your parents planned on being home?”
“Yes and yes.”
“And did he tell you what he was going to do?”
“He just said he'd hang around and see if he found anything to do.”
Vicky raised a perfect eyebrow. “He's asking your dad for permission to put a ring on your finger, Lils.”
Lily's lips formed a small “o” as she finally got it. She looked at her best mate. “Think my dad said yes to him? Father can be such a… um, pain in the arse comes to mind.”
Vicky nodded sagely. “Well, I don't think he'd reject James, but I definitely some sort of little speech and very difficult question or two will be asked. I suppose you'll just have to wait until James proposes to find out!”
“Hmm.”
“Will you say yes?”
“I suppose I sort of have to, don't I?”
“You should say no just to be funny!”
“I'm not entirely sure that James would take no for an answer. And if I dared to say that, he'd probably murder me with his own two hands without giving me two seconds to explain.”
“Good point! Ah, must run, Lily love. I've got another dinner date.” She winked. “See yourself out babe.” Then poof! she was gone.
*~*
A/N: Two days late. Sorry, I was tired Thursday and then I spent Friday training for my volunteership at the best hospital ever. So here it is. Technically, it's done Friday, but as you're all so very picky… Yes. So. Um. Enjoy?
I wish I could figure out how he's gonna propose!!
By the way, that finger/grab/baby/smile thing between Lily and her father happened between me and mine. Cute, huh? (I was very cute, thank you.)
Review because you know you love me.
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Ten: Do You Believe In Loneliness?
By Natali K. A.
Over a month later, James was still a little uncertain as to how, when, and where he'd ask Lily to spend the rest of her life with him. Not that it had slipped his mind or anything. No, Sirius made sure to bug him and remind him and poke him constantly.
This time was no different.
“Mate, you need to ask her already,” Sirius whined. “I want to see you married off already. You've been flitting around—”
“I do not flit, Sirius.”
“—nervous and just all jumpy because you've had this ring forever now and you haven't just asked her already!” Sirius continued. “Ask her, or I will.”
James narrowed his eyes. “It's not exactly the easiest thing to do, is it?”
“And just what's so bloody difficult about it?”
“Have you ever tried to propose to anyone, Padfoot?” James snapped.
Remus snickered from behind his book, turning the page. “Relax, the two of you. James, it'll turn out fab. Sirius, don't worry. You won't have to deal with his endless pacing much longer.”
Sirius nodded, as if that settled the matter. “Remus, want to go out for a drink? This will give James the perfect opportunity to ring Lily up and ask her to marry him. We'll pick up a few chicks.”
“Sounds fun.”
James rolled his eyes as his two friends disapparated. But having thought it over, he decided that Sirius did have a point. Only he'd do this his way, because it was his decision to make. Partly, anyway.
*~*
“Vic, James and I are going away for a mini-break,” Lily squealed happily into the receiver. “He owled me earlier today with the idea. Won't tell me where we're going though, so I'm not sure what to pack.”
“Pack lightly,” Vicky replied, sounding preoccupied. “It's warm in most places. Of course, if he takes you out of Britain… Take a jumper, dear.”
Lily nodded out of habit, knowing that Vicky couldn't actually see her. “You don't seem very interested, Vic. I was thinking that maybe James would actually give in and fuck me.”
“Don't be crude, Lily, it doesn't suit you.”
“Bite me. As I was saying, I was hoping—”
“I wouldn't bet on it,” Vicky interrupted, staring at her closet. “Should I wear my jeans or that white skirt I bought last week?”
“What's your mood?”
“I'm sort of thoughtful, really. Haven't been paying attention to much else than what's going on in my head today.”
“And that would be?”
“Don't worry about it. I'll tell you after your break.” Victoria threw herself onto her bed and stared up at the popcorn on the ceiling. “What did he say exactly?”
Lily snorted on the other end. “What do you think he bloody said? He asked if I wanted to go away for the weekend and I said yes. I'm horny as a rabbit and I really need a good shag right about now.”
“You're a sex-aholic,” Vicky diagnosed dryly. “You're just upset because he's exhibiting more self-control than you are. Am I right or am I right?”
“You're right,” Lily sighed, sitting on her suitcase in an attempt to shut it. “Pants! I can't close this sodding suitcase!”
Vicky rolled her eyes. “Be there in a sec.” Then she was there, literally, in a second. She sat on the other end of Lily's suitcase. “I thought I told you to pack light!”
Lily gave her a look, the sort of look McGonagall used to give them when they turned in a hilariously short essay. “This is light.”
Together, they did eventually shut the thing, smiling proudly with hands on their hips.
Then it hit Lily.
“It's times like these,” she groaned, “that I wish that I would remember I was a witch before I'd gone through all the trouble.”
Vicky looked disgusted with herself, mirroring how Lily felt.
“Well, it's us, innit?” Vicky laughed. “What more do you expect?”
*~*
James appeared in Lily's room that evening at eight, just like they'd agreed he would. He had his tiny bag with the bare essentials in his hand.
“Lils, you here?”
“In the bathroom!” she called out. “Had to find something to put my hair up with.” She walked out, smiling and looking very comfortable in a pair of shorts and loose top. “Will you take my stuff for me, sweetheart?”
James looked around. “Where is it?”
“There.”
“Lily, you don't mean this trunk do you? This is the one we took for a whole year at Hogwarts!”
“Yes, I know. Dead useful.”
His eyes looked heavenward, as if to ask what he'd done to deserve this. But he didn't argue, because he knew how women were. After all, his mum probably would've packed even more. Poor Lily in all probability thought that she'd actually held back and was leaving a bunch of “essential” things such as creams and scented soap and whatever else girls used…
“Fine. Well, let's go, shall we?” he asked, levitating her trunk.
She smiled, kissing his cheek in greeting. “Let's.”
An hour later, they were settled in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in Britain that Lily did not know exactly. She didn't exactly care either.
“So, what is there to do here?” she asked as she clicked on the telly. “I mean, all I saw was grass and grass for miles with a couple hills here and there.”
James smiled to himself, climbing into bed. If she only knew. “You'll see tomorrow.”
“Are we heading back tomorrow night?”
“We are.”
She sighed. “Now I feel silly for packing so much.”
“I didn't want to say anything.”
“I wouldn't have brought that pink skirt if I'd known. Oh well, it wasn't so bad, was it?” she asked him. “It would have been a terrible embarrassment if I'd packed three times what I'd needed, eh?”
For the second time that day, James' eyes turned heavenward. Oh, Lily.
“Come lie down,” he said, pushing back the covers for her.
She jumped off her chair and took off her shoes, happy as a clam to slip in beside him. “We'll have a grand old time, won't we? Our first minibreak.”
“Yep. Get to sleep, Lily.”
She rolled her eyes, as it was only a little after nine. But it would do. She was quite content to just lay in his arms for a couple hours, watching the telly until sleep claimed her.
Of course, it would have been so much more entertaining to screw him, like she really wanted to, like she really thought they should be doing, but no.
Of course not.
Of course they wouldn't, because James had been overcome with this sudden urge to be old fashioned near to two months ago.
Little bugger.
*~*
At one of the biggest school events that Hogwarts held, Lily was close to tears.
How couldn't she be?
It was utterly pathetic and very disgusting even to her, that she was so depressed over the fact that all her mates seemed to have some bloke to hang out with while she was stuck playing the role of Happy Head Girl With Not A Care In The World.
She wondered sometimes if she scared the guys off. She was perfectly popular and didn't lack for dates in the least, but it wasn't anything lasting. She'd always felt as if guys thought she was unattainable for some odd reason.
It's not like she was unattractive. You'd have to be bloody blind to think she wasn't—not that she was overly conceited about it, just very sure of herself. But it just couldn't escape her notice that they always seemed to worship her from afar.
Lily bit her lip, feeling the corner of her eyes begin to itch. The Head Girl could not just break down crying in the middle of a party! But apparently, that's just where she was headed.
An old, slow song came on and nearly everyone went out on the floor. The thing about these parties is that most people were included in every dance instead of being a wall flower—the anti-social losers didn't come to join the rest.
If she could just find a nice, quiet, dark, empty corner she'd consider her night well used and be satisfied. Perhaps then she could cry off with a feigned headache.
“Hey, Head Girl. Dance with me,” said a familiar voice as a hand clamped gently around her elbow, interrupting her bee line to her cry corner.
Lily turned to James Potter and was sorely tempted to accept. But in the end… “James, thanks, but I think I'd rather sit this one out. I don't feel very g—”
“Come on,” he pleaded, smiling handsomely and tugging her a little. “You'll feel better. Promise.”
She conceded defeat, allowing him to drag her unwilling self onto the dance floor to join everyone else. And though she'd been on her way to release all of her pent up emotions concerning how utterly lonely and pointless her love life had been this year, she couldn't help but smile.
About a minute into their quiet dance, James brought his lips close to her ear to have a conversation with her. “Now, what's the matter? Beautiful girls are not supposed to feel sad in the middle of parties.”
Lily was taken aback, surprised that her feelings had been so easily read on her face. She'd always thought that she'd had the amazing ability to mask what she was really feeling. Apparently not.
Again as if reading her mind, James assured her, “Don't worry, no one noticed. But I insist you give me some insight on why there were tears in those lovely emerald eyes.”
“Nothing,” she said, using the overused response. As if that would deter him.
“Lily, you can trust me. I just want to know why you're so down.”
She shook her head, even though she wanted to tell him. “You wouldn't understand.”
“Ah,” he said wisely, irritating her. “I see.”
“No, you don't see. How can you? You have no idea what I'm feeling.”
“Not that I haven't tried to understand.” The song ended, but he didn't release her though she'd dropped her hands immediately. “Will you come on a walk with me?”
Lily sighed. “I suppose. I don't really think you'd give me an option.”
He squeezed her hand reassuringly, finding his way through the crowd of students and professors to go out the front doors.
They stepped out into the chilly night and Lily was immensely glad for her cloak. They didn't speak at first, just enjoying each other's company.
About five minutes into their little stroll, James finally asked his question. “So, what's the matter?”
Lily looked away from him, toward the lake where the Giant Squid was playing with a clump of seaweed, tossing it into the air repeatedly and trying to catch it. Most times, the squid succeeded.
“I'd really rather not talk about it.”
James nodded, shoving his hands into his pocket. “I can understand that. After all, it's me, James Potter, the Boy You Hated And Now Mildly Dislike Though Pretend To Be Civil To.”
“No, James, I don't dislike you, mildly or otherwise,” she giggled, knowing that he knew that but wanted to hear it straight from her mouth. “Though you're perfectly aware of that, so I suppose I should have said I did and seen what you would have done.”
He laughed. “I would have had to kiss you.”
She raised a brow. “Seems presumptuous of you. And quite unrelated as well.” They continued walking along the outer wall of the old castle.
As if in retaliation to her prior threat (saying that she did actually dislike him), he pushed her up against the wall—gently, as not to harm her.
“While presumptuous,” he muttered, staring deep into her eyes, “I think you will agree that no woman can resist me once I kiss them. Care to find out?”
Lily took a deep breath and seriously considered replying in the affirmative, just to see what would happen and what would happen and what it would feel like.
“Hmm. I'll take your word for it.”
James scanned her face, to see if whatever answer he was looking for could be found there.
She began to feel that her space was being invaded, and while it wasn't exactly unpleasant—it was James Potter, who happened to have lost some of his arse-like qualities—she definitely needed him to move away.
“You're in my bubble.”
He leaned closer, grinning wolfishly and both scaring and exciting her.
“Sweetheart, you don't know what it is for me to be in your bubble.” Whether it was a threat or a promise she couldn't tell. Wasn't exactly sure she wanted to find out.
“James,” she whispered, closing her eyes. “Fine, damn you. I was lonely. I felt lonely in the middle of hundreds of students of Hogwarts. I wanted someone to spend time with me, just laugh or sit in silence.” Her eyes opened slowly. “Now will you get out of my bubble?”
“I told you, I'm not in your bubble. Someone's in your bubble when you don't want them there.” One of his hands drifted up to her cheek, which he cupped. “You shouldn't be lonely. You're not alone.”
“You don't have to be alone to be lonely, you know. Just like you don't have to feel lonely in order to be alone.” He wasn't backing away, she wished he would. That or kiss her, but he had to do something. She couldn't take this much longer. A warmth was spreading through her body.
He leaned his forehead on hers and she was very aware of the fact that their lips were now mere centimeters apart.
“You shouldn't be lonely,” he repeated hoarsely, hands gripping her waist.
Why wouldn't he just kiss her?!
“Well, I'm not anymore, am I? You seem to have planted yourself in my bubble,” she joked. She would not touch him, she would not. He would direct this entire thing. Luckily, that didn't seem to bother him. Quite the opposite.
“And I won't move out of it until—unless—you say so.”
She didn't.
Slowly, as if time was suspended for just that moment, he brought his lips against her soft, warm ones. It was pure heaven, just as he'd guessed, dreamed it would be. James could not bring himself to back off, like his instincts told him to.
“Oh,” she moaned into his mouth, bringing her hands to either side of his face. “God, please, no. Stay in the blasted bubble all you like.”
He chuckled, pressing his body to hers and squashing her against the wall.
Minutes later, panting and satisfied if just for the moment, they looked at each other shyly, unsure of where to go next.
“Thank you for trusting me,” he whispered, kissing her again. “And for giving me open access to your bubble.”
“You didn't give me much of a choice.” Her hands found the hem of his shirt where they went under and raked his muscular back softly with the fingernails. He shuddered pleasurably. “I think we need to get back.”
He nodded, looking away to the sky. Reluctantly, he separated himself from her and took her hand. “Let's go in then, Bubble Girl.”
“That's Miss Bubble to you,” she smiled, confused at what had just happened and what was supposed to happen next. Did that mean they were dating or that they just wanted to have some fun?
She shrugged mentally. Honestly?
Didn't give a fuck and couldn't be bothered to care.
*~*
A/N: Yes, late. Thursday I got home from this big event at my school and I was just dead tired and honestly? Yeah. Wanted to sleep. So whatever. Friday Daddy picked me up and off we went to his house, where I no longer have a wireless connection for some odd reason (bloody neighbors moved it, probably. Never did like them. Dunno how to share!). However, here I am at 12:35 A.M., just returning home. And even though I have to be up in five hours, I'm here because I feel bad.
Now you have to review.
Ooh, the dream in this chapter was definitely fun to write. Who doesn't just adore a man who throws you up against a wall and kisses you?? (Unless of course you're a heterosexual male in which case… Yeah, you don't like it do you? Ha.)
Mm. Yum.
Anywho much love,
Natali K. A.
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Chapter Eleven: Godric's Hollow
By Natali K. A.
Lily awoke stretched across the wide bed of the room James had reserved for them in that little God-forsaken little village in the middle of nowhere.
The warm feelings she'd had during the dream came back, and a satisfied little smile slid onto her lips. The dreams were back and they were better than ever.
Even though the romance she and James had shared was nothing like her little dreams—or escapes into fantasy as she liked to think of them—it made their relationship even better.
Though their relationship would probably be better if A)he screwed her already! B)he proposed to her and C)if she knew where he actually was at the moment.
“Up so early, Lily?” he asked, coming from the bathroom with just a towel around his waist. Lily had to fight back a groan as she watched a droplet of water slide its way down from his neck to his chest to his abdomen to his navel, where it disappeared into the dark hairs underneath.
“James. Put on some bloody clothes and get bloody dry unless you want me to jump on you and throw you onto this bed so I can have my naughty little way with you.”
He stopped on his way to his bag for some clothes and grinned at her, cocking his head to the side. “Why, I'm tempted to let you. Maybe tonight, hmm?”
Lily raised an eyebrow, rising up onto her elbows to look at him better. “Are you serious or are you just joshing me? If you're just joshing me I'm going to be tempted into picking up a pair of scissors and snip-snipping off your shortest appendage.”
But he seemed undeterred and only let his smile broaden as he turned and bent down to look through his clothes. She appreciated the view from her position on the bed and sighed dramatically.
Why was he torturing her??
“Get up if you're awake then. We've got a lot that I want to do today,” James said, heading back for the bathroom. “And we've still got breakfast to eat before that.”
“Prat,” she murmured under her breath, throwing off the bed covers and heading sleepily in the direction of the bathroom to shower.
James chuckled to himself, toweling off his hair as he thought of what he would do that very day.
By that night, Lily would be his fiancé. Of that he was sure.
“James, could you bring me a towel? I forgot to grab one,” Lily called from the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack.
Completely unsuspecting, he went to the closet where the towels were kept and took one. He walked, whistling, towards the bathroom. And so absorbed was he in his whistling that he didn't notice that Lily was standing in front of him stark naked until he made to open the door.
He rolled his eyes. “Lily, you're good.” He walked forward so that his nearly naked body just barely touched hers. “But I'm better.” With a cocky laugh, he hung the towel on her face and shut the door.
“ARGH!” she shrieked, tossing the towel to the floor. “You must think it's so bloody funny that I'm sexually frustrated, don't you?” she yelled to the other side. “Just be glad I love you so much because if I hadn't, I'd be at some other bloke's place right now, one who would give me some!”
His laughing only increased because he knew how very unlikely that was.
*~*
Hours later, on top of two of the horses that James had bought from the man at her parents' dinner party, they sat next to each other, looking out over the land.
“She's beautiful,” Lily gushed for what seemed the twentieth time that day, patting her Arabian mare. “Now if we could just say her name right…”
“Mahraylees,” James attempted, still unable to say the horse's name correctly. “Well damn it, can't we just rename her? So much simpler than attempting to teach my English tongue to roll that r.”
Lily shrugged. “Seems rude. That's her name.”
“Yes, what's your point? Name's are meant to be changed.”
“Like when? Are you suddenly going to up and become Tim one day?”
James grimaced. “Heavens, no! I meant last names. Female last names anyway.” His eyes passed over her once quickly before returning to survey the field before them. “My horse depresses me though.”
Lily looked at him curiously. “Why? He's perfectly fine and his name is very pronounceable.”
“He's a gelding.”
Lily blinked a couple times. “Yeah. What about it?”
“Lost that which made him male. I feel sorry for him and it just makes me sad.”
Lily burst out laughing, shaking her head. “I'm sure he's alright about it by now. You'll get used to it.”
He nodded, not really paying attention. “This is a pretty place, isn't it?”
Thought she'd at first been reluctant to spend two days here—it seemed extremely boring—she had to admit that it was very relaxing and nice area.
James abruptly kicked his gelding into a walk. “Come on, I want to show you something. The whole reason that we came here.”
Infinitely curious, Lily spurred her horse into moving and caught up with him.
They must have traveled for nearly an hour, sometimes cantering, before they reached the location James seemed to have been looking for.
About seven or eight minutes from the village on a cantering horse stood a two-story house atop a slight hill.
“Where are we?”
James raised his eyebrow, sitting back in the saddle and letting his shoulders slump. “Well, that would depend. If you like the house and we bought it, it would be our home. If it's not up to snuff and we walk away, then it's just a house on the outskirts of a muggle village in the middle of nowhere.”
Lily found it hard to breathe, as she examined the house with new eyes. “Oh,” was the only thing she could say.
He jumped off his horse and tethered him to a nearby tree, Lily's with him. Reaching up a hand, he helped her down and practically dragged her off toward the house.
The door had been left unlocked, as it was in no danger of getting anything robbed. Not that there was actually any furniture about…
“The owner's a man in London, friend of my father's,” James began to explain. “He's had this house sitting around doing nothing for years now with a couple relatives coming to stay every now and then. He's offered to sell it to me for a good price, providing I promise him one thing.”
“What's that?” Lily asked idly, eyes scanning every corner of the giant welcome hall.
He crept up behind her, sliding his arms around her waist. “To fill it up with children.”
It was at that moment that Lily's heart truly sped up. “Oh?”
“I came here once, as a child. My parents had asked to borrow it for a couple weeks in the summer,” James said, breath tickling her ear. “And do you know, I had a dream about it recently?” Removing an arm from around her, he gently pushed her in the direction of a door to the left. “Come see the banquet hall. It's just outstanding.”
When Lily finally got a good look at the two-story tall banquet hall adorned with golden draperies and marble floor, she understood.
“Yes,” she whispered, walking away from him and revolving slowly in a circle. “Vicky got married here, to Jonathan.”
He nodded once, hands in his pockets. “She did. I wasn't sure you'd had the same dream.”
“Ages ago, before I even knew Jonathan was a person on this planet,” she mumbled, awestruck. “No part of my dreams have come true yet, James. Except for our dating.”
“I can't say for certain whether they'll get married, here or not, but I do know one thing.” He headed in her direction with clear intent. “But that dream wasn't a simple coincidence.”
“But… I…” she sighed. “I didn't know you'd had it too.”
“After yours had supposedly stopped. One night, it just popped into my head. And I knew. I think it was the night I first denied you sex,” he snickered.
Lily humphed.
“Lily… Do you like it?”
She gave a short laugh. “It's not as if I can't. I mean… It's too big a coincidence, you're completely right.”
“Then we can sign the papers?”
She smiled warmly at him. “You're going to fill this place up with children?”
“I'm not. We are.” He paused, hesitating. Then he reached further into his pocket and came out with a ring. “Will you let me have that honor?”
Lily's smile grew to a toothy grin that could have lit up an entire room in the dead of night.
“Yes, I will.”
*~*
“He what?!” Vicky shouted, sounding almost angry. Lily was puzzled, as Vicky had always seemed to be perfectly alright with James up to that point. “Tell me he didn't propose to you,” her best mate begged over the phone, groaning dramatically.
“He did. Why?” Lily asked, alarmed. She continued throwing stuff into her trunk. James had gone to sign the papers for the house.
“Because Jonathan asked me!” Vicky cried out, screaming. Lily held the phone away from her ear, looking at it oddly. Vicky was always full of little surprises. “And I said yes, but it's just too disgusting for us to have gotten engaged on the same day, Lils! No, I'm going to Jonathan and telling him he needs to ask me in about a month, because I just can't deal with—”
“Are you out of your bloody mind?!” Lily gasped, ceasing her packing. “You've found the man you want to marry, he asked you, you said yes, and you're saying you want to break it off because I was asked on the same day? Vicky, you're bonkers!”
“Say whatever you'd like!” Vicky said stubbornly, shoving on shoes. “Jonathan will understand perfectly well.”
Lily rolled her eyes. “When's the date?”
“Next year.”
“Next year? You're going to wait that long?”
“His idea,” Vicky sighed, frustration evident in her voice. “He says we haven't known each other long enough and that there's absolutely no rush. Honestly, I didn't put up much of a fight.”
“What happened to staying single?”
Vicky glared at the telephone. “Fuck you, Lils. You knew I'd get married. Now go and meet up with your fiancé so I can break it off with mine. No one else need ever know. Later.” She slammed down the receiver, Disapparating for Jonathan's.
On the other end, Lily was giggling, bewildered. Vicky was such a very complex person…
Her eyes strayed to the ring on her left hand for the hundredth time in the past thirty minutes. She couldn't wait to show it off. The Potters were well-known for their excellent jewels. James had not disappointed her.
So everything was great and happy. Now, if he would only just bang her already, it'd be doubly spectacular. She'd work on it. She was determined to win.
*~*
A/N: Short chapter, but I wanted to close it here, because… Well, the time has come.
The next chapter is the very last. Originally, this fic was supposed to for three, and it will have gone for twelve. While I loved writing it, I think I need to quit while I'm ahead—while I'm still updating on a somewhat regular basis. Point is, my fingers are running out of things to write and time's getting scarce. I don't want to turn this into one of those fics that never gets updated or that should have been finished ages ago.
I love what this fic has become, and I hope everyone truly has enjoyed it.
The reason it took me so long to come out with this chapter—where they finally get engaged—is because I just couldn't figure out how they should get engaged. I didn't want it overly corny, it had to do with the dream James had had without Vicky actually getting married, and… Just sweet. And romantic and different. I'm hoping I accomplished all my goals. Special thanks to my evil Cali twin Amanda who really did lend a helping hand with the horses. It was all her, those horses, though I think she'd had a different idea in mind, lol.
Otherwise, thanks for all the reviews and I do hope you'll review again so that A)I'll review on time next week and B)it'll boost my ego. Lol.
Much love,
NKA
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Chapter Twelve: A Rude Awakening
By Natali K. A.
“What's the deal with you two?” Sirius asked Lily one night as James went to fetch her a drink. One of their school mates had thrown a party at her parents' house, which explained the reason that Sirius was forced to be in uncomfortable dress robes.
“Pardon?” Lily asked, nibbling an hors d'oeuvre.
“You and my mate Potter over there.” He lifted his chin in James' direction. “Getting pretty serious, aren't you?”
“I've no idea what you're talking about,” Lily said coolly. “I've only gone on a handful of dates with him.”
“But it's getting serious nonetheless. I know Prongsie. He's serious.”
Lily felt a tad elated at that news, but didn't let it show through on her social façade. She didn't quite trust Sirius Black, no matter that he was her boyfriend's best friend.
“That's your opinion.”
Sirius raised a dark eyebrow at her, sipping his firewhiskey. “Evans, stop it. Admit it. You know it just as much as I do.”
“I don't see what business it is of yours, Black,” Lily replied haughtily.
He took a step toward her and turned his back as to block her from James' view. “He is my business,” he told her firmly. “Don't forget it.”
She narrowed her bright emerald eyes at him. “He's a big boy, Sirius. I'm sure he can take care of himself.”
“Well, that's just the thing, you see. He can't. Of course, he thinks that he can, but that's not the reality,” Sirius explained, eyeing James as he was stopped by a Sixth Year to chat. “If you break his heart, it'll break him. He's very strong, but it's not exactly every day that James is captivated. I'd rather not have to pick up all the pieces, thanks.”
She stared at him, her eyes hard. “You're a good friend, if a bit annoying. By a bit I mean a lot.”
He snapped his head around to look down at her—she was about nine inches shorter than him. He scanned her face, trying to figure out whether she was teasing him or not. It was the small smile on Lily's lips that convinced him.
“Just… be careful, alright?” he sighed, closing his eyes out of fatigue. “There are dark times ahead and I'm afraid we wild children will fall head over heels for each other, find out it was a crush, and be crushed ourselves.”
“If you keep worrying like that, you're going to be an old man way before your time,” Lily remarked, that small smile still on her lips as she watched James finally lose the Sixth Year to make his way toward them. She felt Sirius' gaze on her and met it. “What?”
Sirius smiled at her, a warm smile so friendly that it even made her smile back at him. She could see why James was best friends with him.
“You'll do, Lily,” he said quietly, placing a hand on her shoulder and turning to the new arrival.
James handed Lily the glass of champagne he'd gotten for her and smiled at two of the most important people in his life. Whatever had happened in the scant two minutes he was gone, it had changed the atmosphere between them considerably.
“You two look very cozy. Should I be worried?” he joked.
Sirius chuckled, downing the contents of his glass. “I tried, mate, but she's dead devoted to you. Sad to say that she's the first female to refuse the charm that is Sirius Black.”
Lily moved over to James and hugged him with one arm, leaning her head against his chest. The steady beat of his heart was comforting, as was the heat that radiated from his body. She knew that if she took a deep breath she would smell his favorite cologne—Sexy Wizard by that Jacque bloke who said he was French though he was really from Cork, Ireland—and the smell of his soap.
James smiled down at her and kissed the top of her head, winking at Sirius.
“She's mine. Sorry,” James shrugged, grinning at his friend. Remus sauntered up to the three of them, a glass of some vile looking liquor in his hand.
“Great party, no?” he asked dryly. “At least there's liquor.”
“At least,” James said. Suddenly a thought formed in his head. Clearing his throat, he said, “Lily dear, there's a painting in the next room that I think you'd adore. Would you like to see it?”
“A painting,” Sirius snorted. “Yeah right.”
“I'm trying to be tactful. You should try it.”
“I'd love to see this painting. Sounds fascinating.”
“Yes,” James smiled, settling a hand on her waist and bringing her even closer against him. “If you'll excuse us, dearies…?”
Remus snickered. “Should we wait up?”
“Don't be crude. We're at a classy party.” After a moment, James added, “Nope.” He steered Lily to the next room over, where they did indeed look at a sixteenth century portrait of some duchess.
“It's wonderful artistry,” Lily said, her voice barely above a whisper. “Look at the detail—you can see the pimple on the edge of her nose! Vibrant colors, too.”
“When I suggested we look at works of art, I wasn't talking of any specimen hanging on a wall,” he murmured in her ear.
She laughed. “We're at a party, James. Someone could walk in at any moment.”
“Then how fortunate for you that I know of a place where we can have some privacy, no?” His hazel eyes glinted mischievously at her.
“We can't go around someone's house without their permission,” she said, shaking her head. “And how embarrassing if we are caught.”
“Don't worry. I don't think she'll have any problem with us using the guest house.”
Lily was still hesitant and it showed on her pretty face. “I don't know…”
He straightened up from hugging her from behind and turned her around gently. “I'm not forcing you,” he told her softly, rubbing a thumb across her palm. “It's alright if you don't want to.” He smiled at her, and though it was dark she could see the honesty written in his face.
“It's not that,” she giggled, nervous suddenly. Well, if that wasn't just mortifying. What's the big deal? It was just sex—she wasn't a virgin or anything. She just… hadn't had more than one partner. From all she heard, James was the Don Juan of Hogwarts and the surrounding area. She was probably the only girl he hadn't shagged silly already. And Victoria. She didn't much like the… uh, obnoxiously gorgeous ones.
There were things to consider. So much revolved around the first time you slept with a person. It would dictate the rest of the relationship. If it sucked, then the relationship would die because the sex is that bad. If it's outstanding, out of this world, WOW sex, then what if the next time it isn't as good and you're super disappointed? And mediocre isn't nearly good enough…
What pressure.
“You're thinking. My father always warned me about women who liked to think. Said I should run in the opposite direction,” he chuckled. “But no, you're right. This isn't the ideal place, is it?” He kissed her, tongue caressing every crevice that it found. “But when we get back, you're mine. Got that?”
Lily blinked. “I think that I do.”
And it was that night that Lily Evans and James Potter first made love to each other—and it wasn't terrible, it wasn't mediocre. It was exactly what James and Lily were—perfect.
*~*
Lily awoke to someone jumping up and down on the bed excitedly. She bounced around like a rag doll and nearly fell off the bed before she thought to sit up and push whoever it was bothering her off the bed. Of course, it proved to be James.
What a rude awakening indeed.
“You promised to take me to a theme park today!” he said happily, bouncing out of her reach when she tried to shove him off. “Get up, get up!”
“I said I'd take Harry!” she hissed, groaning. “James, it's not even bloody open at this hour! Why do you act like a child all the time?”
“You adore my childlike behavior. I'm carefree and easy to be around.”
“And then you get in the mood and suddenly you're perfectly adultish. Am I right?” she asked dryly, not really expecting an answer. She had to smile. “Stop that infernal bouncing,” she sighed as she lay back down, staring up at the ceiling. It wasn't a second later that James' face came into view. “Yes, your highness?”
He grinned, kissing her forehead. “I love you.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. “I love you, too.”
A thoughtful look crossed his face before he said slyly, “Do you think we have time to…?”
In answer to his question, a baby started howling from the next room. James groaned, pushing himself off of Lily and glared at the ceiling.
“That child is starting to annoy me,” he growled.
Lily laughed, rolling out of bed and putting on her robe. “Yeah, alright. I can tell you're starting to regret having him whenever you start cooing and making baby noises at him.”
James too got out of bed and opened the door to their master bedroom as he headed for the baby's room. The door was already open and he proceeded to walk in, making for the wooden crib.
“Spoilt child,” he muttered, picking up the sobbing Harry, who was red in the face. He pressed a kiss to his son's temple. Baby Harry quieted down, but still whimpered every now and then. When he saw his mom enter his room, two mugs of hot coffee in her hand, he started squealing and laughing, holding out his hands to her.
“Ooh, you want to go with Mummy, don't you sweetheart?” she smiled, setting down the mugs on a table and taking him from her husband. “Come and Mummy'll feed you. We're going to have fun today, my love.”
“Go ahead, cuddle him!” James called after her, picking up the coffees to follow her downstairs. “But you're cuddling me tonight, alright?”
Lily turned around at the bottom of the stairs to smile up at him. “Yes, Papa.”
When he reached them, he wrapped his arms around the two most important people in his life and kissed his wife thoroughly, and then tickled his one year old son. The subsequent giggle caused both parents to break out in a grin.
“We've no time to dawdle,” Lily said, heading for the kitchen. “I want to make it to Disney World early, if you please.”
On that cool October morning, everything seemed perfect to James. Indeed, it would have been. Who would have known that just two weeks later, James and Lily Potter would no longer be alive and breathing? Or that Harry would be orphaned, left to the mercy of his aunt and uncle?
And that would be the rudest awakening of all.
*~*
The End
*~*
A/N: Um… I can think of quite a few people who want to kill me right now. Perfectly understandable, of course. But I did finish! Just… Um. Sorry?
Yeah, I had been planning to end this on a happy note, but it just happened like this. Any complaints can be filed with my fingers. It's all their fault.
As for a good movie recommendation, End of the Spear was especially good. I saw it today with a friend of mine. Really nice movie. So is Sky High. I'm so gay. Lol.
Love to you all, and OMG I can't believe I actually finally finished it!!! (Three or four chapters, huh? I don't know why I even bother!)
I am so thankful to all who reviewed. You were all super great and wonderful readers and I hope that you'll continue to remain loyal (please?). I truly am horribly sorry about the time it took me to finish this thing. Whoops?
Forever I am your
Cuban Princess, NKA
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