Realization

Kaykos

Rating: PG
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 4
Published: 30/05/2003
Last Updated: 15/06/2003
Status: completed

Harry finds himself staring at his best friend quite often, the sweet feeling in his stomach every time he sees her. What could this be? Is it just a crush, or something he's actually going to go through with? What will a single moment provoke? Read to find out!

Chapters

1. Realization

1. Realization

Realization

He sat, looking at her. He didn’t know why he was staring at her; he didn’t want to know. All he wanted was to be able to look at her forever. She wasn’t as beautiful as the other girls he knew… in fact she was rather plain, but there was something about her. She was beautiful in her own way, beautiful on the inside he concluded, sucking lightly on his sugar quill.

She was reading, as usual, her mind completely absorbed in the text. She didn’t even notice her best friend watching her. She didn’t notice when he bent over to pick a various object up; smelling her hair as he bent down. She didn’t know he always watched her. Too oblivious, wrapped up in school, she didn’t see the odd look in his eyes, the soft gleam.

Opening doors for her had just become common; she thought nothing of it, until she caught him looking at her. She shifted her eyes to the next page, and that’s when she saw it. He was watching her, his head cocked slightly to the side, his hair set askew about his face. Unconsciously, she blushed, tucking a poof of her bushy brown hair behind her ear. She shifted her eyes back to the text, for the first time not able to concentrate on her book.

Abruptly she got up, startling him. She bit her bottom lip, her mind working fast to come up with something.

"Er- I’ve got to go look up something in the library. I’ll meet you and Ron in the Great Hall for dinner," Hermione mumbled, picking up her books, quills, and various pieces of parchment; stuffing them all into her bag. Harry, still in a bit of a shock, nodded his head, looking down at the book he had been neglecting for hours.

Had she noticed? He couldn’t help but ask himself as she walked out of the common room; the portrait hole swinging closed behind her. He shrugged, looking into the fire, wondering what would happen if she had.

A strong hand suddenly clapped Harry on the back, a beaming, freckled face popping up in front of him.

Harry smiled. "Hey Ron!" Harry laughed at his friend; his bright orange hair sticking up at all ends, his normal goofy grin plastered to his face.

"Where did Hermione go?" Ron asked, a sudden look of seriousness on his face. Harry gulped, not knowing why Ron wanted to know. He grew tense, shrugging her shoulders.

"Look where anyone would look to find Hermione," Harry sighed rather coldly, looking back down at his book. Ron nodded, shooting Harry an odd look, padding out of the common room.

Why does he want to know where she is? Harry asked himself bitterly, wondering what his best friend could want with his… other best friend. Harry shook himself mentally, Ron had just as much right to spend time with Hermione as he did, after all they were all best friends. He couldn’t help but wonder why he was getting so edgy when it came to her, it wasn’t like he fancied her or anything… oh heavens no.

Determined to get her off of his mind, he looked back down at his book. He spat when he found he was reading Hogwarts: A History. His eyes grew wide, suddenly closing the book, placing it gently down on the table. He leaned back on his chair, placing his hands neatly behind his head, ready to take a long nap. Crookshanks pranced over to Harry, wrapping his tail around Harry’s leg.

Harry suddenly got up, receiving a rather annoyed ‘meow’ from Crookshanks, pushing his chair in. He was sure he was going to go mad if he didn’t leave the common room, so he did. He didn’t know exactly where he was going, but that didn’t matter at the moment. He just wanted to go somewhere.

He found himself walking in circles about the Quiddich Pitch, finding the fresh air soothing and sweet. He plopped down in the middle of the field, lying back onto the soft grass.

The clouds passed by in soft wisps, forming themselves into various shapes, the soft autumn breeze caressing the tip of his nose. He was at home at Hogwarts; he had been for six years now. Harry closed his eyes gently, scenes of his friend’s loving faces shining in his mind. He suddenly yawned, turning over on his side, letting the wind lull him into a deep sleep.

***

Harry woke up with a jolt, the suddenly cold wind flashing past his red cheeks. He heard a soft voice next to him, calling his name, tapping him lightly on the shoulder. He turned over on his back, seeing Hermione bending over him. She smiled, offering him a hand up. He took it, standing upright, smoothing out his robes.

Hermione laughed at him, digging in her robe pocket for something. She took whatever she was looking for out, handing it to harry. It wound up being a napkin wrapped with food. "You missed dinner, I hope this will do."

Harry smiled, munching graciously on the food she had gotten him, barely managing to mumble a thanks between bites. She laughed, walking ahead. He followed her, staying behind her, watching as he bushy hair bounced with every step. He gulped his food down, smiling.

She turned around, seeing him watching her again. A cold flash sped up her spine, making her shiver slightly under her heavy robe. Hermione paused, waiting for Harry to catch up to her. He did, slowly enough, but wound up walking by her side.

"So, I hear Ron went looking for you," Harry couldn’t help but prod. Hermione looked at him, confused.

"Yes, I suppose he did. Wanted help with potions…" she trailed off, wondering why Harry was so interested.

She was so consumed in her thought; she barely managed to avoid walking straight into the doors to Hogwarts. She smiled, a bit embarrassed, tugging at the handles of the doors. The immensely heavy door didn’t budge.

She felt Harry’s cold fingers wrap around her own, her face flushing upon his touch. She didn’t know why, but through the cold air, she was warm, warm and content. Harry moved forward to grip the door better, his chest pressing slightly into her back. She sighed wistfully, closing her eyes, the smell of pine circling her, his smell. He looked down at the top of her head, a grin creeping across the corners of his lips. Shaking himself out of his revere, he tugged the door wide open.

As soon as he had come close, he was far. She opened her eyes, seeing the door open. He held it open for her, a smile creeping about his lips. Harry bounded inside, his arm still holding the door open.

"You going to stand there all day or come inside?" he teased as she walked in. Playfully, she slapped the side of his arm.

"I was enjoying the nice autumn air, and then you had to go and ruin it for me!" she laughed, trying to convince herself she wasn’t lying. She was enjoying the air, the air that was wafting from him. She mentally slapped herself, That’s your best friend, Hermione, you shouldn’t be thinking about him like that!

"Have you started your potions homework yet?" she asked, changing the subject at they strolled up the stairs to the Gryffindor common room. Harry shook his head no.

"You know, I’m not going to do it for you! I never have, you know that. It's just plain cheating!" she sighed, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. Harry pouted at her, quite cutely, his eyes scrunching beneath his glasses. Hermione let her eyes linger on him for a moment, but shook her head.

"Argh! No!" she rolled her eyes, stepping inside the portrait hole. Harry followed her inside, sitting beside her on the warm cushy couch, which was next to the blazing fireplace.

Hermione began to spread her books across the table, about to do homework. Harry’s hand was on hers again. A jolt flew up her spine, a warm tingle spreading through her bones. She looked over at him.

"Care to play a game of chess?" Harry asked, waving to the chess set that was already lying open on the table, sneaking a sly glance with Ron who was sitting in a cushy armchair. Hermione huffed, looking from her books, to the chess pieces.

"But I have to start on my essay for Professor McGonogall," she pouted, torn between the two choices.

"Awe, come one Hermione, you can do all that later. It’s not like you don’t already have a hundred and two in that class anyway," Ron sighed plopping down next to the two. "Besides, I’d like nothing more than see you lose a game of chess at the moment."

Her eyebrow flew up into her forehead. "You think you two can beat me just like that?" she asked. Ron and Harry nodded. "Well, for your information, you can’t! I’ll have you know, I checked out a book on chess this summer!" she huffed, pushing her books aside, positioning herself so she could easily move the chess pieces.

"So, which one of you are going to play me?" she asked, looking from one boy to the other. Harry and Ron exchanged a shrug, Ron clearing his throat.

"I won’t play you, I’ll beat you." With that, the game started. Pieces smashed each other to the floor, Ron’s knight smashing Hermione’s pawn to the ground. She flinched, her eyes darting quickly about the board.

Harry watched her as she examined the positions of the pieces, her mind twisting, trying to work out a way to win. Her tongue was sticking slightly out of her mouth due to hard concentration, her eyes staring contently at the board. She sighed, moving a pawn forward, only to have it crumbled by Ron’s. She grunted, refusing to admit defeat.

Soon enough the game was over, Ron the victor. He laughed. "I win again!" Ron jumped up and down, doing his signature victory dance. Hermione rolled her eyes, gathering her books.

"Chess is just a silly waste of time anyway. To think I could have been writing my paper," she grumbled, sitting down on the chair Ron had previously occupied. Harry let out a soft chuckle, receiving a harsh glare from Hermione, giving Ron a high five.

Harry and Ron spent the rest of the night chatting, watching the comings and goings of their fellow housemates. Soon it was midnight, a very sleepy Ron mumbled that he was going to bed, and that Harry should too. Harry politely declined, shooting a quick glance at Hermione.

Okay, so I like her, big deal. Harry thought to himself, tearing his eyes away from her. She hadn’t noticed, as usual. He let out a sigh of relief.

"Aren’t you going to beeeeeed?" Hermione yawned in the middle of her sentence, putting her quill down on the page of her book, closing it carefully as soon as Ron had disappeared up the stairs to the boy's dorms.

"I… was just going to- Er, just stay up for a bit longer," he mumbled, trying to figure out what he wanted to say, but settled for no excuse. Hermione shook her head, picking up a spare book. She walked over to the couch, plopping down next to him.

"Well, then do something productive," she smiled, handing him her Potions book. Harry opened the book, scanning through some of the pages, seeing that Hermione had gone back to reading. She shivered, rubbing her arms as if to warm them.

Harry looked up from his book. "You cold?" he asked, cocking his head to the side. She nodded, shivering from a cold chill. The fire blazed warmly in front of them as Harry removed his robe. Hermione blushed, muttering that he didn’t have to.

"But, I want to," Harry smiled, wrapping his robe around her, making sure she was snug and warm. She bit her bottom lip, warning herself not to look at him in his school uniform. She fidgeted in her chair, scooting away from Harry, suddenly aware of their close proximity.

A long, awkward silence pierced the air, neither daring to speak to the other. She felt embarrassed, he was afraid to say anything about what he felt. He didn’t know how she would take his confession. The last thing he wanted was to lose her as a friend over some silly crush.

Hermione glanced to the side, over at Harry. Making sure he wasn’t looking, she let herself gaze at him. He seemed to be reading, but she knew he wasn’t. What could he be thinking about? She asked herself, mulling the thought over in her head. She leaned a bit closer to Harry, her nose picking up on the smell of his shirt. He began to move his head. Hermione panicked, snapping her head back down to her own book, her eyes wide.

"Well, I must be going up to bed…" she sighed, closing her book. Harry jumped up, nodding his head. She began to stand up, but she tripped over a spare chess piece that way lying on the floor.

"Meep!" she gasped, stumbling over. Harry stuck out his arms, catching her with ease. She lay in his arms, trying to regain her posture. She managed to stand up, her wide eyes looking into Harry’s. Merlin, they’re gorgeous… she trailed off, looking into his deep pools of emerald. They seemed to shine with something, something Hermione had never seen before. There was a certain gleam, it reminded her of a muggle romance movie.

Harry gulped little beads of sweat forming on his brow. It’s now or never, he told himself, barely keeping Hermione up in his arms. When she straightened herself, he didn’t let her go.

"Hermione, I have to tell you something," Harry trailed off, suddenly shy, his eyes darting down to his shoes. "Lately, I’ve been feeling more for you than before." He saw her open her mouth to speak up, but covered her lips with a finger. "Please, just let me say this," he sighed, looking deep into her doe brown eyes.

He took in a deep breath, taking a slight step away from her. "I don’t know why, but every time I’m with you, I can’t take my eyes off of you. I get this feeling in my stomach each time I see you walking down the stairs; I’ve even found myself going out of my way to make excuses so I can do something as bizarre as to smell your hair. You want to be my friend, but I want to be more…"

Hermione gasped, her eyes glazing over with tears. She looked deep into his eyes, making sure it was all true, making sure she wasn’t dreaming. Harry looked at her uncertainly; nerves eating away at him every moment that passed that she didn’t speak. Smiling she moved closer to Harry.

"What if I want us to be more too?" she asked, a grin playing at her lips. Harry smiled, bending down, his head tilted to the side. Hermione closed her eyes as soon as their lips touched, a sweet sensation flooding her bones. She moved closer to him, kissing him back with all her might. It was what she had been waiting all these years.

Harry bent down, deepening the kiss, his hands encircling her waist. Her hands flew up, wrapping themselves around his neck. She parted her mouth slightly, his tongue slipping inside, caressing the interior of her mouth. She smiled, now knowing how good a simple realization could feel.