Rating: PG
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 6
Published: 30/07/2006
Last Updated: 30/07/2006
Status: Completed
Hermione can't understand what is wrong with Harry and tries to find out on her, only to come to a much better solution.
Hermione woke with a jump. Her nightmares had seemed to match the weather: dreadful and horrific. Hugging her legs she felt herself shaking, moreso from the dreams and what they meant than the weather. If she had to be honest with herself, she would admit she loved thunderstorms. The way the sky seemed to light up for a moment as the heavens cried. How the clouds seemed to have a fight and their anger was let out for the world.
She was never like some of the other children, who ran to their parents when it thundered and rained. Quite the opposite, actually. She had been grounded, the first and only time, for sneaking out to watch a thunderstorm from their porch. When her mother went looking for her, she was grounded to her room, without books! The indignity of it was enough to prevent Hermione from doing anything wrong under her parents attention again. They knew how to punish her and they had done so.
With a sigh, she moved over to the window, watching the sky light up. The thoughts about her nightmare returned. It had been less than a month since they had destroyed two of the Horocruxes. A month that, to her, had been nothing but torture. Her nights had been filled with studying everything she could get her hands on. Charms, runes, jinxes, hexes. Everything. Nothing seemed to be helping.
Harry was looking more worn and tired than ever when he would come in late to the dorm they shared as Head Boy and Girl. He would collapse onto the couch, and all she could do was watch. He refused any kind of charm to numb the pain. He kept saying that it was all worth it. While she doubted it, and pushed the subject as often as she could, she never did anything about it. Because he had asked her not to. All she did was place ice upon his bruises and wait up with him. Wait through the nights with him, so he would not have his nightmares, and neither would she.
She heard muffled yelling coming through her door, down to the common room she shared with Harry. She threw on her nightgown and grabbed her wand. She moved to the door, and cracked it open.
“-a man. Just some thunder and lightning. Be a man, Potter.” Hermione heard. Going down the stares, she watched Harry pace across the common room. Sitting upon the stares, she felt like she was invading, but knowing Harry, he would brush off whatever it was, and the problem would never be solved. He jumped at the next crash of thunder.
“Dammit.” He grabbed a small vase of flowers and chucked it against the wall, shattering it. He jumped again as the thunder crashed once more. Through the streaks of lightning, she could see tears in his eyes…almost as if….
“Harry?” Hermione said. He turned to look at her as she walked down the stairs. He immediately turned away, his hands at his eyes, brushing the tears she had seen earlier. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” he said. He kept his back turned to her as the thunder crashed again. His muscles barely twitched, like he had practice at hiding his fear. “What would makes you think something was wrong?”
“I heard you talking to yourself,” Hermione said, sitting down on the couch. “Was it a nightmare?” She led him on, knowing what it really was. He shook his head.
“I just couldn't sleep,” Harry said. “I'm going to go back to bed.” He made a move to go up to his room, but she caught his arm, stopping him.
“Would you stay down here?” Hermione asked him. “For me, please?”
“What's wrong?” Harry moved to sit down next to her, taking her hands in his. She gave him a sad smile, the fear of her nightmares still so real. “Are you still having the nightmares?”
She nodded, leaning into his shoulder. They both needed this. While Harry would never admit to it, she knew he felt better when she was with him, just like how she felt better when he was with her. He put his arm around her, holding her closer with the next thunderbolt.
“What are they about?” Harry asked her. She didn't say anything for a moment, letting the beat of Harry's heart calm her down. She smiled slightly at the thought of how close they were, and the jealous Ginny would feel.
“The usually Harry, the usually,” Hermione said. His hand began to play with her hair as she looked up at him. “I'll talk if you will.”
“What?” He looked surprised and confused about the comment, but didn't stop his slight massage.
“Why were you down here, if it wasn't for nightmares?” Hermione asked, pulling back for him. She needed to be thinking clearly and his hand wasn't helping. He moved back from her.
“Nothing Hermione, I'm fine,” Harry said.
“Harry, its okay, just talk to me about,” Hermione said. He stood up and moved away. A thunderbolt crashed outside and she say him flinch slightly. How many times had this happened during the school year and she didn't notice?
“No, there's nothing wrong,” Harry backed away as she stood. “Please, Hermione just let me deal with it. I can handle in on my own.”
“Harry,” she reached for him, but he took off running up the stairs to his room. She felt something wet hit her hand, and she realized she had been crying.
I0I
The storm didn't end in the morning. If any thing, it grew over night and hung over the castle, taunting the people inside. Hermione paid close attention to Harry through the day, watching him for his slight flinches. They were there, but only if someone were watching, very closely would they have been seen. It tugged at her heart how much the storm affected him. She chastised herself repeatedly for not noticing this reaction before.
She stayed close to him all day, and if he was mad at her, he didn't say. If anything, he was welcome to her company, taking her bags and books between classes. This did not seem to sit well with all parties though. Ron kept shooting her and him strange looks while Ginny's face had turned into a glare.
“What are you doing?” Ginny said. Hermione had gone to the library with Harry to work on their homework together, like they always had. She had gone off to find a book she thought would be helpful with the Potions essay.
“What are you talking about?” Hermione asked. There was another crash of thunder, and she unconscious turned to look at table where Harry was at.
“You're moving in on my boyfriend,” Ginny said as if it were the simplest thing in the world. “I've been watching you. What did you give him?”
“Ginny, I haven't done anything to him,” Hermione said, starting to move back toward her table.
“He liked me just fine last year, then you talked to him I bet, and now,” Ginny's voice trailed off, both of them knowing what she meant. Harry had broken up with Ginny last year, and Hermione had agreed with the action.
“Harry doesn't have to consult me on everything,” Hermione said. “I'm watching out for my best friend.”
“And I'm watching out for my boyfriend,” Ginny said, pushing her way past Hermione. She walked up to Harry, flirting with him. Hermione watched from afar, his discomfort showing on his face. After the next crash of thunder, Harry's head whipped around, before settling on her. Hermione walked back to the table, with Ginny glaring at her along the way.
“Find your book?” Harry asked as she sat back down.
“No, I could have sworn they had it though,” Hermione said.
“I could go look for it for you?” He offered. She shook her head, smiling at his gesture.
“Thank you, but I think you and I can both manage without it.” Harry nodded once before going back to his work.
“Harry, hon, are we going to do something this weekend,” Ginny asked, pushing her chest closer to his face. Hermione nearly laughed as Harry moved away without looking up at her.
“Ginny we've been through this,” Harry said. His voice was tired, like a record that had been played too many times.
“But we're safe here at Hogwarts, nothing's going to happen to us,” Ginny said, sitting on the arm of his chair. Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but Harry held up a hand, stopping her. His arm twitched lightly with the bolt of thunder that crashed outside. “Besides, I know how much you like it when you were with me. I could feel it.” Hermione blushed at this, looking away.
“Ginny, I have more important things to do,” Harry said in a calm voice.
“What's more important than love?” Ginny asked. Hermione looked back at Harry who finally looked at Ginny.
“Nothing, and that's what's between us,” Harry said. Ginny's face turned a bright red, and the smack across Harry's face eclipsed the thunder outside. Harry only stared at her though. His strength surprised Hermione at times, as well as comforted her. This was one of those times.
“I waited for you, I would have given myself to you,” Ginny said, her angry evident in her trembling voice. “Why?”
“Because I don't need someone to worship the ground I walk on,” Harry said. “I want someone that likes me for me. Not for this.” He pointed to his scar.
“But I do, I do like you for who you are,” Ginny pleaded. Hermione could tell she was getting desperate.
“Harry, I'm going to leave you two alone for a while,” she said as she gathered her things. Ginny turned and glared at Hermione once more.
“You blame Hermione for this, and you're not even going to get an explanation,” Harry said. His voice had dropped and had a protective growl to it. “I'll try to finish this later Hermione, okay.” She nodded and left to the crashing of another thunderbolt.
She head toward their dorm, not really hungry. If she did want something, Dobby was around to get it for her if she wanted it. The house elf had started to work exclusively for Harry during the summer as he traveled with her and Ron in search of the Horcruxes. They found two, but the last one still eluded them.
Reading Hogwarts, A History on the couch in their dorm, Hermione still could not shake the worried feeling she had in regards to Harry. The sound of someone entering, she looked up from the paragraph to see Ron walking towards her, much to her disappointment.
“Hermione can we talk?” Ron asked.
“Sure,” she said, sitting up on the couch as Ron sat in a loveseat across from her. “What do you want to talk about?”
“Us,” Ron said. She stared at him for a moment, letting the word sink in.
“What about us Ron?” Hermione asked. She fidgeted in her seat, unsure of where the conversation was going. Ron and her had tried it during the summer, and the beginning of the school year. When Harry first arrived in the hospital wing within a week of starting, everything between them fell apart. While a month ago, the memories still burned at her slightly.
He paused and she grew more nervous. She kept running over all of the lines in her head as she had to turn him down once more, yet his words stopped that train of thought.
“Is there anything going on between you and Harry?” Ron asked. Hermione's eyes shot up at the question. He didn't give her a chance to respond. “You've been staring at him all day, which I'll admit isn't that different than any other day, but he just seems more aware of it, that's all.”
“Ron, there's nothing going on between us right now,” Hermione said. She looked over at the door for a moment. “Its not that I wouldn't like for there to be, its just I don't want to add another thing to his plate. He's got enough going on. He doesn't need to worry about me.”
“Hermione, he already does,” Ron said simply. “That seems to be his constant worry whenever the two of us talk. You're always on his mind, whether you know it or not.” Ron stood up, smiling at the shocked look on her face. “I'm going to find Luna before curfew ends. Now that you two might actually get together, I can finally ask her out.”
“Why didn't you before?” Hermione asked.
“Because my best friends needed me there first,” Ron said with a smile. Hermione stood and pulled him into a hug. He awkwardly hugged her back and pulled away. Ron still didn't know too much in regards to women, even after what he did with Lavender. Maybe Luna would do him some good.
“What was that all about?” Harry asked as Ron left. He seemed tense to her, though she did not know why.
“I was just getting some advice from Hermione on how to ask Luna out,” Ron said, calling over his shoulder. Hermione watched as Harry's shoulders relaxed, as if a load was taken off his shoulders.
“Come here,” Hermione said, patting the space next to her. Harry sat next to her, his stomach growling as it did. She laughed slightly at him “Dobby?”
The tray of food appeared before them. They shared a small smile before diving into the food. They both knew that Dobby watched over them, something Hermione had found annoying yet helpful at times. Dobby was the one that brought her the ice and cloths for Harry to use after his training. Now, though he was there for them whenever they needed a little extra help or food.
“So what did you talk to Ginny about?” Hermione finally asked after several moments of eating in silence.
“I asked her to leave me alone.” Harry took another bite of his sandwich. “I don't have time to deal with her petty romantic interests in a man that doesn't even exist.” He relaxed against the couch, looking at Hermione for a moment. “I'm just so tired of being someone I'm not.”
“You are Harry,” Hermione said. She took his hand, squeezing it as the thunder crashed around them. He did not flinch though, not this time. “You're just Harry.”
“Thank you,” he said. “That means a lot to me.”
For the rest of the evening, Harry was relaxed. He did not jump at the crashes of thunder nor did he have training that particular day. Hermione could not explain why he was like this, only that she thought it was because he did not let go of her hand.
“Goodnight, Harry,” Hermione said as they stood at her stairway. He gave her a smile as she hugged him tightly, not wanting to let go. He hugged her back, and it was only when she pulled away, did he let her go. She blushed as she realized they had just been standing there for quite some time.
“If you need me…” Harry's voice trailed off as he stared down at her. Hermione reached up and cupped his cheek, smiling at him.
“That goes double for you,” Hermione said. She let go of his cheek, and kissed him softly there. “I am here to make sure you're safe Harry.”
“And there is no way I could ever thank you enough for that,” Harry said, kissing her cheek. “Good night, Hermione.” Hermione smiled and bid him goodnight once more before leaving him. The storm had subsided and she felt that there was a chance that things would work out better for everyone
I0I
Hermione awoke to the loudest crash of thunder she had ever heard. After recovering from the two-foot jump off her bed, she stood up and grabbed a robe. If that had scared her as much as it did, then it must have scared Harry was well. She quickly went to their common room, slightly surprised that he was not there. She climbed the stairs to his room, entering carefully in case he did sleep through it.
She let out a short gasp as she entered. The room was in shambles. The bed curtains were torn and flung open, the sheets were scattered across the room with various books. The lightning crashing through the windows, lighting up everything, only punctured the room. Had she not moved in further, she would have never heard the tired whimpering that came from the closet.
“Harry?” she asked softly as she opened the door to the wardrobe. “Oh Harry.” She collapsed onto her knees, staring at him as tears filled her eyes.
Before her lay Harry, cramped inside the closet. His face was contorted in fear, but his eyes were shut. Hermione touched his forehead lightly, the sweat cold against her skin. She pulled back as he sat up suddenly, fear etched in his eyes at the next crash of thunder.
“Her-her-hermione?” He managed to get out as he shivered in fear. She sobbed as she wrapped him in a hug. “Why are you here?”
“The question is, why are you here?” Hermione managed to asked. She pulled back, but kept her hold on him.
“I had a bad dream,” he lied. He moved his hands to wipe his eyes, but Hermione caught his tears first.
“Do you want to tell me about them?” Hermione asked, pulling herself closer to him. He shook his head as he wrapped his arms around her. “Then could you tell me why you are afraid of the storm?” She felt his entire body stiff at this.
“I'm not afraid of them.” She moved back, looking into his eyes as the thunder crashed around them. She saw the flinch of fear in them as the lightning lit up the room.
“Harry, please, stop lying to me,” Hermione whispered. She moved into the cupboard with him, lying almost on top of him. “Please, its okay.”
“No, its not,” Harry said. “Its pathetic that I'm a grown man afraid of thunder and lightning.”
“Why?” Hermione asked. She moved so her back was against the wardrobe, facing Harry. There was not much space and she had to overlap her legs with his, but he did not seem to mind.
“You promise you won't tell anyone else?” Harry asked as he held her hands. She nodded, giving him a shaken smile. “It may sound stupid, so please don't laugh at me.”
“Harry, I could never laugh at you,” Hermione said. “Please.” She gave him her best puppy dog look, to which he just blushed and looked away.
“When I was six, Dudley wanted to go to the park, and since Mrs. Figg wasn't around, they took me with instead of throwing me into cupboard. So we went and I was told to not bother Dudley or I'd be in trouble. Well, I ran off as soon as we got there to the sandbox, building up my own little world. I think I was there for an hour before I noticed that Dudley and my Aunt had left, leaving me there. I wasn't really worried until it started to rain.” Hermione felt him tighten his grip on her hands as he spoke. She moved back to lean against his chest, wrapping his arms around her waist. He lightly kissed the back of her head, thanking her for the support. “It started to thunder and lightning and I felt so scared of the sound. IT was so loud, louder than anything I've ever heard before. I just hugged my chest, praying that it'd go away or someone would come and get me. For an hour Hermione….and hour….I sat underneath a tree, hugging myself.”
“Did the storm stop?” Hermione asked as she felt the tears against her neck. She couldn't turn around, as he held her too tightly to move. He shook his head against her neck as the tears fell.
“Aunt Petunia finally returned to get me,” Harry whispered. “She kept yelling at me for being stupid enough not to come home with them and how I was a burden to them. I was locked in the cupboard for a week for it. But in there, I felt safer from the thunder and lightning. It wasn't so loud and it wasn't as close when I was in there. I just felt safer in there.”
“So that's why you're in here?” Hermione said. “Well, that's not going to happen any more.”
“What?” Harry asked. Hermione moved in his arms just enough to look at him.
“You've calmed down, Harry,” Hermione said with a smile. “The storm is still bad outside, but you've calmed down.”
“I have,” he said, as if surprised by it. “Can I ask you a question? Please don't be offended by it either.” She kissed his cheek before settling back into his arms.
“I'll be happy to stay with you tonight, only if you cast a charm to enlarge this closet slight.” Hermione said, closing her eyes. “I don't feel like working out the cramps in my legs tomorrow because my knees were up to my throat.” She smiled as Harry chuckled and the wall of the cupboard moved further way, allowing both of them to stretch out.
“Thank you, Hermione.” They were the last words she heard for the night, but all the same, they chased away nightmares.
I0I
“Hermione?” A warm voice behind her woke her up. While her body felt sore from the position she was in, she had not had a nightmare and felt relief flood her at the thought. Something warm was against her back, and immediately, she knew the source.
“Yes Harry?” Hermione was thankful that she was in front of him so he couldn't see her blush.
“Would you mind if I let go?” She looked down at his hands linked with hers that she had held onto through the night.
“Do you promise to come back?” Hermione asked, turning her head slightly to look at him. He blushed at this, nodding his head. She gave him a light kiss on his cheek before letting go of his hands. “Good, then we both can get out of here.” She crawled out first before offering her hand to him. He blushed as he took at it, trying to his reaction to her.
Hermione blushed as well, but pulled him close, holding him as close as he could be in a hug, causing him more discomfort. “You are too important to leave behind, and I will make sure that you never are.” She let got his before turning to his room. “When you get out of your shower, and fix your problem, meet me downstairs. We have a lot to talk about.” With that, she turned and gave him a chaste kiss. “That is a promise for more later.” She gave him a smile and left as he tried to grab her again, wanting more. She giggled at this, and felt her heart flutter, knowing that things would not be perfect, but close enough for the two of them.
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