All His Fault

All His Fault

By Holland Sauce

All Characters belong to JK Rowling and are not mine.

Why?

Why had she lain down on the sofa? Her brain had told her it was a bad idea but her feet currently seemed to have some sort of override and had demanded that she took her increased weight off them.

And so here she was, Hermione Granger-Potter, Transfiguration Teacher-In-Training and eight months pregnant, stuck on the sofa.

Hermione gave a small snort at this and looked up at the oak rafters. When she and Harry had married just over eighteen months ago having a baby hadn't exactly been top of their list of things to do. But at the same time both she and Harry had wanted a family at some point so they'd decided together that although there were potions and charms, which they could use to prevent such an occurrence, they'd let nature decide!

Then, eight months ago, after a couple of weeks of rather gruesome nausea which she'd passed off as flu (Harry had had it a few weeks before that so it wasn't too hard to fool him) Hermione had paid a visit to Ginny, now a fully qualified healer who'd confirmed (with much squealing) that Hermione's guess was right and she was indeed pregnant.

At this point said baby decided to remind it's Mother of it's presence and gave a small kick causing Hermione to chuckle softly and rub her swollen belly.

“Hush little one,” she said softly as she stroked the bump. “Daddy's going to be home soon.”

She now turned and looked at her wand that was lying on the coffee table. Under normal circumstances she could use a simple `Accio' to get her wand and then pull herself up with a `Carpe Retractum'.

Unfortunate, as she discovered over the last few months, being pregnant weren't normal circumstances and had resulted in her wandless magic skills being total unpredictable (at one point when trying to summon her wand it had ended up in Ron's nose!). As a result Hermione had fallen into the habit of keeping her wand in the pocket of the dungarees she'd taken to wearing. The only problem with this was when she sat down at which point her wand would start to dig into her side so of course she'd started to take it out of her pocket when she sat down and put it somewhere within reach.

And that's truly where her problems had started as she hadn't banked on two occurrences. Firstly, the new sofa she and Harry had brought just the other week was a lot softer than she'd counted on when she lain down and secondly Crookshanks brushing by the coffee table causing her wand to roll to the other side.

`So near and yet so far,' she sighed mentally just as the baby decided to squirm a little more.

“Oh,” squeaked Hermione. “Oi, settle down in there would you?”

The only response was another kick causing Hermione to chuckle.

“Your defiantly going to be a Quidditch junkie aren't you? Well I'm going to tell you like I told your father. Your are not going anywhere near a broom until you're at least eighteen months old!”

Another kick.

“No, that is final!” replied Hermione firmly.

“What's final?” said a familiar voice and Hermione turned her gaze towards it to see her husband leaning in the doorway, a broad grin on his face.

“The fact that this child is not going near a broom until their at least eighteen months old!” replied Hermione.

“Ah,” said Harry with a nod. “So, are you going to come over here and give me a hug or what?”

“Yes well,” huffed Hermione. “I might if I could get up but unfortunately I'm stuck! And whatsmore it all your fault!”

“My fault?” replied Harry, the grin on his face widening. “How on earth can it be my fault that your stuck?”

“Well for a start it was your inability to control your penis that got me pregnant,” retorted Hermione. “Now shut up and come and help me up or I'll risk some wandless magic!”

“Can't have that can we now?” chuckled Harry as he straightened up and made his way across to her. “I remember poor old Arthur and his ears when you tried enlarging the dining table.

“Oh Merlin, you had to mention that one!” giggled Hermione blushing profusely. “I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eyes again!”

“I can still see the looks on the twins faces when Molly thought they'd tricked him with one of their inventions,” smirked Harry as he held out his hands. “Alright, come on.”

Hermione reached up and took her husband's hands and allowed him to pull her up.

“Oops, steady!” said Harry with a chuckle as she staggered forward slightly. “You alright?”

“Yes, but I really need a pee!” said Hermione hurrying past Harry towards the bathroom whilst Harry chuckled as he bent down and retrieved her wand.

“So what else did you get up today?” he called as he walked towards the bathroom door and leaned against the wall.

“Oh, not much,” called Hermione. “Mum stopped by.”

“More socks?” chuckled Harry.

“More socks, mittens, hats! Hell, she's knitted more things for the baby than I did for the House Elves!”

The sound of flushing filled the air before a much happier look Hermione stepped out the bathroom.

“Thank goodness!” she murmured rubbing her swollen belly before giving a sigh. “I can't believe in two months we're going to be parents!”

“Yeah, I know,” agreed Harry with awe in his voice before he allowed a crooked grin to cross his face.

“What?” asked Hermione with a raised eyebrow.

“Have I told you how beautiful and sexy I find pregnant women?” said Harry as he reached up and stroked his wife's face.

“Oh shut up and kiss me!” grumbled Hermione. “But don't think I'm letting you off the hook! This is still your fault!”

“Yeah but you wouldn't have it any other way would you?” replied her husband.

“No,” was Hermione's simple reply and with that Harry claimed her lips in a gentle kiss.

**Author's Note**

I don't know how this story came to me, I truly don't but it was just a plot bunny that wouldn't go away so here it is

-->