Far Away

Amynoelle

Rating: PG13
Genres: Drama, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 6
Published: 03/08/2006
Last Updated: 04/12/2007
Status: paused

They were the best of friends, but in the wake of terrible tragedy, things are forever changed for the Trio. Guilt still haunts the survivors and Hermione Granger thinks that nothing will ever be the same again. Throwing herself into her work has been her answer, but even that hasn’t helped heal her pain. A mysterious patient might help her regain something that she thought she’d lost forever.

Chapters

1. Prologue-Hermione's Journal

2. Falls Apart

3. Fall Away

4. In My Life

5. Away From the Sun

6. Other Side of the World

7. Little Lies

1. Prologue-Hermione's Journal

Authors’ note: This is something I’ve been toying around with for awhile. I’m not sure on how long this will be but I can tell you how strange it is to write by myself after writing with someone else for so long. I’ve been working on this for quite some time. I don’t know how soon or how often the updates will come, but I will try and be better at it than I was at Drop in the Ocean. I hope you guys will like this and even though this does start off sad, just be patient with me and have faith. You guys really are the best. Please let me know what you think. And inspiration for this came from one of my favorite songs right now, “Far Away” by Nickleback.

Prologue

Okay. This was not exactly how I thought my life would turn out. Not in a million years. I had a set of goals and everything I did was a means to an end. I would be the best student. The best healer. And maybe someday, Minister of Magic.

But, as one of my parents’ favourite singers used to say, “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” And I never fully appreciated that statement until a fully grown mountain troll crossed my path and I was befriended by two boys I’d written off as complete morons. Well, that’s not entirely true. One of them had definite potential. The other one just seemed to exist to drive me completely insane.

But more about that later.

I am not ashamed to say that I am an overachiever. I have been from the moment I was born. I arrived early---two months ahead of my mum’s due date. I said my first words and took my first steps way ahead of schedule. I was reading by the time I was three years old and spoke fluent French by the time I was eight. There are numerous pictures of me sitting in my father’s study with a book almost as big as me open on my lap. Books were my only friends growing up, next to my parents. I loved getting lost in a story, in the characters. Books opened up a new world to me that fascinated, excited and challenged me.

As you can probably guess, I wasn’t very popular in my class. But that was okay with me. At primary school, I concentrated on my studies and helping my teacher. I wasn’t concerned with who I would play with at recess. To me, that was a colossal waste of time. So, I would spend my recess sitting on one of the benches reading or writing. And maybe, just maybe, I sometimes looked enviously at the girls in my class and wished that one of them might ask me about my book or if I wanted to join in the game. But, they never did. And that was okay. Really, it was.

I had bigger things to consider. I had better things to do with my time.

I remember one day pulling out my leather bound notebook and writing down the plan for my life. I was going to breeze through primary school and then get acceptance at one of the most prestigious boarding schools in Great Britain. And then, I’d go to University and pursue my dream of being a dentist like my parents.

It was everything I wanted.

But it certainly wasn’t how my life turned out.

No, someone had other plans for me.

I can still remember the day I received the letter. My next-door neighbor was having her 11th birthday party and big surprise---I wasn’t invited. I’d set outside on the front step watching as some of my schoolmates arrived for the party. Jessica Stillman was a total airhead. I bet they spent the entire party talking about rubbish like dolls and makeup and boys. I didn’t understand those things and they certainly didn’t interest me. So, let Jessica Stillman and her lemmings have their stupid birthday party. I was going to go to the museum with my father when he came home from his golf game.

I heard the sounds of laughter coming from the Stillman’s backyard and rolled my eyes. Well, I’ll just go inside and see what my mum was up to ---see if she wanted to play a game of Scrabble. I’d nearly made it to the door when I looked up to see an owl of all things flying toward me. I watched in awe as it deposited a letter at my feet and then perched itself on the railing alongside our porch.

It was a bit early for the post and I wondered if Jessica’s parents had hired some sort of animal trainer for their daughter’s party and this owl had missed his target. I bent down to pick up the letter and noticed that my name was on the front printed in fancy script. My parents had applied to a number of boarding schools and I wondered if this was the first acceptance letter. With shaking hands, I turned the letter over and saw an unfamiliar seal and a very strange name.

Hogwarts?

By nature, I am a very curious person so I thought there wouldn’t be any harm in opening the letter. It was addressed to me, wasn’t it? And then I could run into the house and tell my mum the good news.

I took a deep breath and then tore into the envelope. I pulled out the letter and read:

HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT & WIZARDRY

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chief Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confederation of Wizards)

Dear Miss Granger,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

Okay, this had to be some sort of bad joke. Witches and wizards were things in books and movies. They weren’t real things. They weren’t real people. I bet Jessica had done this as some evil joke and I bet she and her minions were over there just laughing their heads off about this.

But then, again…this would explain quite a bit.

There’d been a few unexplained events that had happened over the past few years that my parents had just written off to…circumstance; or as my mum liked to say “just one of those things.’ There was this one time when I was five years old that I’d wanted to get a piece of my mum’s sugar-free candy that she kept in a tin on her desk. I’d tried to get a piece, but she’d decided to put it up on the top shelf so I couldn’t reach it. Well, I’d somehow managed to get the tin to come to me. I’d been so awestruck by it; I hadn’t even been able to eat a piece of the candy. There were all sorts of small things that happened like that…but…wait.

I wasn’t going to be made a fool of by Jessica. I crumpled the letter up and stalked back inside the house. I breezed past my mum into the kitchen and threw the letter in the rubbish bin. Tears were streaming down my face.

Unbeknownst to me, my parents had received a visit a few days back from this Minerva McGonagall who had explained to them all about me and who I truly was. They’d been quite skeptical to say the least, but Professor McGonagall was quite persuasive and patient and she convinced them that this wasn’t some ruse. She’d even given them a handful of books that explained all about the Wizarding World.

My mother took my hand and sat me down and told me what was going on and that it wasn’t a joke. She said that I was very special and that I had a gift that not too many children had. And if I wanted, I could pursue my life as a witch.

Looking back on that day now, I wonder what would have happened if I’d told her that I didn’t want to go to Hogwarts. How would my life have turned out? What would my life have been like had I not met Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley?

But my 11 year old self was wide-eyed and innocent. And she knew exactly what she wanted to do the moment she’d read about this magical world. And I felt that maybe at Hogwarts---I’d finally be home. Maybe there, I’d finally felt like I belonged.

So, I’d told my parents that I wanted to go to Hogwarts and I wanted to be a witch.

And with one lost toad, I met the two boys who would change my life completely.

*********

From the moment I stepped on Platform 9 3/4, I saw that children in the wizarding world weren’t that different from the ones in the Muggle world. My fellow students were already pairing off in cliques and no one stepped forward to introduce themselves to me. My new life was already starting out like my old one.

Oh well, I thought, at least I’d be able to re-read Hogwarts: a History on the long train ride. With hugs and kisses and promises to write, I said goodbye to my parents and stepped on the train. People pushed past me as they clamored for empty compartments. It took forever for me to find a seat, but I finally squeezed in with this girl who introduced herself as Susan Bones and a boy who was holding on to a toad and looking out the window.

His name was Neville Longbottom and there wasn’t something about him that made you want to be nice to him. He seemed eager to make friends and even though I would have much rather like d to read, I set my book aside and listened to him as he told me all about his toad Trevor. He was about to show us this purple spot on Trevor’s back when he looked down and noticed that Trevor was nowhere to be found.

Neville freaked out and Susan and I both tried to calm him down.

“You just had him,” I pointed out helpfully. “He couldn’t have gone far. We’ll split up and look for him.”

I told Neville to take the back part of the train and I’d take the middle. Susan volunteered for the front section and off we went.

My opinion of my fellow students wasn’t bolstered as I barged into the compartments in my section asking if anyone had seen Neville’s toad. Some of those older students could be so crude!

It didn’t take me long to finish my section and since Neville seemed to be moving at a snail’s pace I decided to help him out. He said that he’d already checked this one compartment in the back, but I told him it couldn’t hurt to double check. Before he could protest, I pulled open the door to that compartment. Two boys that looked to be our age were sitting down across from each other. The red-haired boy had his wand poised to perform some sort of spell on that unsuspecting rat on his lap.

And as I look back on it now, I really was rather pushy and full of myself. Needless to say, they didn’t have that high an opinion of me upon that first meeting. And as we settled into Hogwarts, I didn’t have that high of an opinion of Ron Weasley. He seemed to enjoy talking bad about me and this of course culminated in him saying some derogatory things about me that I happened to overhear; which inadvertently led us to that mountain troll that pretty much set us up as friends for life.

My feelings toward Ron seemed to change during our third year. This was kind of strange since he pretty much drove me insane that year. He accused Crookshanks of killing that rat of his and he hated me for telling McGonagall about Harry’s new broom. Excuse me for looking out for my best friend, thank you very much! Excuse me for wanting him to live to see his next birthday!

And don’t even get me started on that insanity that happened during the Triwizard Tournament. I can’t believe Ron actually believed Harry intentionally put his name in that cup. I mean…I could see where Ron was coming from, but he knew Harry. And he should have believed in his best friend. He came around eventually, but still…

That’s always been a sore spot between Ron and Harry. Ron’s always thought that Harry had things come so easily to him. And Ron didn’t like just being known as Harry Potter’s friend. He wanted to stand on his own. It led to some rather tense situations and I tried to play the mediator, but sometimes neither of them wanted to listen to reason. In the great scheme of things, what did it matter? Did it matter who got what first? Ron would invariably tell me that I didn’t understand because I wasn’t a bloke. Funny he’d say that when he always seemed to treat me like one of the boys. They both seemed to do that, truth be told.

And it was hard when they both started to notice girls. You should have seen the way Ron Weasley acted when Fleur Delacour and the girls from Beauxbatons arrived. He had this dazed look about him. Even if she was part-Veela—come on!

And Harry and…Cho C hang. I cottoned on pretty quickly that he fancied her. And then again, who could blame him? She was pretty, popular and she loved Quidditch just as he did. But I also knew that she fancied Cedric Diggory and that Harry was a little too late. I don’t know why, but that fact made me quite happy.

But things changed irrevocably that Fourth Year. Cedric’s death set about a chain of events that would be the beginning of the end in more ways than one. Harry and Cho got together during our fifth year and then broke u, in part because she was jealous of my role as Harry’s best friend. I felt guilty about that, but I mean, I was his friend long before she came into the picture. And just because he gets a girlfriend, it certainly didn’t mean that I was going to stop. We’d been through far too much for that and if she couldn’t realize and respect that, well Harry was better off without her.

Fifth year was quite difficult for all of us. I swear if I ever get near Delores Umbridge ever again, I’ll …well, I’m still actually plotting my revenge on that horrible woman and the horrible things she did to Harry. Cruel and unusual punishment doesn’t even come close to describing it.

Our sixth year at Hogwarts…well, I don’t really like to talk about that year. I didn’t really feel like myself, to tell you the truth. I did some things that I normally wouldn’t dream of doing. Yes, I hated watching Ron with Lavender Brown. He was acting like a complete idiot and snogging her right in the middle of the Common Room in front of everyone! He really was a moron. I couldn’t believe I’d wasted any of my time fancying a boy like that.

Yes, I admit it. I did fancy Ron even though for the life of me, I couldn’t fathom why. He drove me mad and he didn’t understand or respect the things that were important to me. He thought S.P.E.W. was a joke and a complete waste of time. He thought I was mental for spending so much time in the library and he belittled most of the things that were important to me.

But, there was just something about him that drew me to him. And it was nice to have him around to lighten the mood during some really dramatic, dire situations. You could always count on Ron to say or to do something that would make things seem a little less serious, even if it was only for a few precious moments. Harry needed that and so did I.

The three of us had been through so much together that the decision to not go back to school for our final year was made without hesitation. There was no way Ron and I would have left Harry to go through that on his own. He needed us and we would be there for him, no matter how dangerous we knew things could get. This wasn’t a game. We weren’t 11 years old anymore. This was serious. This was what Harry had been waiting his whole life for; what the entire Wizarding world was counting on.

To tell you the truth, it was something I’d always admired about him. I never told him this and in retrospect, I really wish I had. He had so much on his young shoulders. The fate of our entire world was in his hands, so to speak. And he never once backed down. We had a few talks just him and me about what it all meant and how scary it was, but he never once thought about running away. He was what all of us Gryffindors strive to be. Brave. Courageous. Loyal. I wanted to be just like him and I hoped that in even a small way, I was.

The hunt for the horcruxes was tiring and it tested not only our strength and endurance, but our friendship. Long days and even longer nights stretched on that summer and we couldn’t help getting testy with each other. And it didn’t help that Ron was always trying to get me away and ask me about what would happen in the future for us. We weren’t guaranteed a tomorrow so how could I even begin to question what the future would hold? I know that he took my hesitation as rejection, but this wasn’t the time nor was it the place to discuss it.

And so we agreed, albeit reluctantly on Ron’s part, to not examine anything about our relationship until after Voldemort was no longer an issue.

Our search took us to places that I’d never seen before and some places I never wanted to see ever again. There are too many things to go into about each of the items we found and truthfully, they’ve been discussed over and over again in the newspapers and on the Wireless.

But there was one night that everything changed.

We were in Devonshire and the search had taken its toll on all of us. We’d seen so much and been through things that no teenagers should have to see. We checked into a small bed and breakfast and barely spoke to each other at dinner. Harry excused himself half way through the meal to take a kip and Ron went upstairs to take a shower and then said he’d probably turn in for the night. I decided to try and curl up with a book, something I hadn’t had the opportunity to do in weeks.

But my heart and mind weren’t in it and I was restless. I decided to go outside on the porch for some fresh air.

I wasn’t surprised to see Harry sitting out there by himself. The wind was blowing through his always messy hair and I couldn’t imagine what he must be going through.

”What are you doing out here?” I asked as I stepped outside.

He didn’t turn around; he kept his eyes focused straight ahead. “Couldn’t sleep.”

I knew from his tone of voice that he probably wanted to be left alone and that I should probably go back upstairs and leave him with his thoughts, but I just couldn’t.

“Weather’s turning cooler now,” I remarked as I sat down beside him.

He nodded. “Summer’s over.”

We didn’t say anything to each other for awhile after that. I was too busy thinking of all the things I wanted to say; all the things I wanted to ask. But I didn’t want to push. If he wanted to talk, he’d talk. And at least he hadn’t stalked away from me and told me to go away.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said.

I looked over at him. “For what?”

“You know what for,” he replied. “For this. You know where you should be right now? On a train back to Hogwarts. Getting ready to start your last year…serving as Head Girl. Ron should be getting ready for the Quidditch season…planning on all the ways he can sneak food back into the dorm…”

“Harry—“

Harry held up his hand. “I’ve already lost so much, Hermione. My parents. Dumbledore. Sirius. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you or to Ron. You’re my family.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked at him; as I listened to him.

“You’re not going to lose us,” I said putting my hand on his arm. “We’re going to get through this and we’re going to be so pathetically normal and mundane, Harry.”

He gave me a wry smile. “You can’t promise that, Hermione. You don’t know if we’re going to be okay.”

“I do,” I argued. “I have a feeling, Harry.”

“You don’t believe in Divination.”

“No, but I---“

“I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I think it’s best that I face what could happen,” Harry said looking up at the night sky. “What probably will happen...”

I shook my head. “You’re going to be fine. We all will be fine.”

Harry squeezed my hand and looked at me. “I don’t know what I would do without you. You’ve been beside me right from the start. I never said thank you and I know I didn’t always tell you how much I appreciated it.”

He was talking as if he didn’t expect to see me ever again. He was talking like he was saying goodbye. My heart plummeted.

“You’re my best friend,” I said simply, trying to stave off the tears.

“And you’re mine,” he whispered. “I’d probably have died years ago if it hadn’t been for you.”

“Harry---“

“It’s true,” he said giving me that smile of his that he always thought would make me cave.

“I’d do anything to keep you safe,” I told him honestly. “You know that. And none of that other stuff matters, Harry. If I’d gone back to school and left you to do this on your own, I wouldn’t have been able to concentrate. At least being here with you, I know what’s going on and I know how you are.”

He gave me a hug and we held each other for what seemed like forever. The tears I’d been holding off fell freely down my cheeks.

“There are some things I’ll need to do on my own,” he whispered into my ear. “You know I’m right.”

I pulled away from him and looked up at him. “We’re not going to let you---“

“There are some things that I need to do on my own,” he repeated. “And I want to know that if something happens to me, that you and Ron will…that you’ll not be sad. That you’ll both have full lives and go on to do wonderful things.”

“Nothing is going to happen to you,” I said firmly.

“Promise me,” he said leveling his gaze at me.

“I-I promise.”

He gave me another hug and I thought of all the things that I should probably tell him. But, for some reason, I didn’t say anything else. I just held onto him, never wanting to let go.

Finally, he pulled away and told me that we should probably go upstairs and get some sleep since we had a big day tomorrow.

“Okay,” I said wiping at my eyes. I made for the door, but he didn’t move.

“Harry, aren’t you coming?”

“I’ll be up in a few minutes,” he said turning away from me.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” I said before walking back inside.

But, I didn’t see him in the morning. When Ron and I awoke the next morning, he was gone. There was no note. I guess he figured we didn’t need one. He thought that this was a battle he had to face on his own. Ron and I were both angry.

”What are we supposed to do now?” Ron asked sinking down into a chair. “Wait?”

He looked to me for an answer.

“I don’t know,” I said truthfully.

Three days later, they found his body and Voldemort’s in the place where it all began: Godric’s Hollow. Lupin and Moody had found him and they were the ones who broke the news to Ron and me. I heard the words, but I couldn’t make myself believe it. He couldn’t really be gone. There was someway that he’d gotten out and that he’d cheated death just as he had when he was a baby. And he was my best friend. If he was truly gone, I would have felt it. I would have known it in my soul. But, I didn’t. Even after we’d seen his cold, lifeless body, I’d refused to believe it.

I kept waiting for him to wake up and give me that wonderful grin of his and tell me to not take things so seriously.

I’d never had someone so close to me die before. I couldn’t believe that it was all over and that Harry’s life was finished before it even had a chance to begin. He was going to defeat Voldemort and he’d have that chance at a normal life with a family of his own. That’s all he’d wanted. He’d told me so. And I’d told him that he was going to have that and so much more.

All around us, people mourned for him. Friends and family tried to console both Ron and me, but we were both kind of numb, for want of a better word. We didn’t know how to react to this. And everyone seemed to be looking at us for the answers. For once in my life, I didn’t have any.

In the aftermath of all that had happened, I threw myself into my studies. I finished up at Hogwarts and then received acceptance to one of the top wizarding universities where I earned my degree as a healer. Ron and I never managed to get together. I never really thought about why, but I think it had something to do with the fact that we were supposed to be a trio. We didn’t know how to be just Ron and Hermione without Harry.

Ron took a job with his brothers and held out hope of one day being good enough to play Quidditch professionally. And he’d married Luna two years after he graduated. She had helped him through his grief about Harry and their friendship had slowly blossomed into love. I was happy for them, but it just reminded me of what I didn’t have.

The decision to leave England was one of the hardest I’d ever had to make, but I couldn’t continue just existing here. I didn’t date. I didn’t do anything for fun. I just worked and dealt with the guilt I felt that I hadn’t stayed up with Harry that night and convinced him that he didn’t have to go through this alone. If he’d had Ron or me with him, he would have survived. I’d known that he was trying to say goodbye to me that night, but I’d still left him alone. I should have stayed with him and tried to talk him out of going off on his own. But I hadn’t and he was gone.

I’d been his best friend and I’d let him down when he’d needed me most.

So I’d moved to the States to accept a prestigious fellowship at St. Mantague’s Hospital in Seattle. But the loneliness and guilt still followed me. And I wondered if one day it would go away.

My therapist thought that keeping this journal would help me. I’m not so sure. Reliving the past is too painful. I came here to start over, but it hasn’t been easy.

The war is over, but the fight seems like it’s only just begun.

I used to smile so easily. And now…I just don’t know.

I DON’T KNOW.

And I can’t stand it.

2. Falls Apart

Author’s note: For those of you who asked, it has been about four years since Harry’s death. Sorry that I didn’t mention that in the first chapter. And even though the prologue was written in the first person, it is much easier for me to write in the third person. But you might see more of Hermione’s journal entries as the story continues.

Chapter Two

Falls Apart

She falls apart by herself
No ones there to talk or understand
Feels sustained, dries here eyes
Finds herself, opens the door inside
People see right through you
Everyone who knew you well
Falls apart, might as well
Day is long and nothing is wasteful

Runaway, Runaway…

(Sugar Ray, Falls Apart)

Hermione leaned back in her chair and surreptitiously glanced at her watch. She really, really didn’t have time for this. She had rounds to do at the hospital, for one thing. And for another, this really was a colossal waste of time.

“We still have ten minutes,” her therapist, Elaine Kinsella said in an almost sing-song voice. This woman didn’t miss a trick and Hermione had learned that the hard way.

“I think we could cut it short for today,” Hermione said impatiently. “I’m already late for rounds and I have to get a head start on my research for my article in the W.M.O. journal…”

Elaine scribbled something down on her notebook and then looked thoughtfully up at Hermione. “Still working yourself hard, I see. Tell me, Hermione…when was the last time you went out on date? Or went out to a movie with friends?”

Hermione looked down at her lap. “My friends and family are in England.”

“Yes, but you’ve been here for nearly four years,” Elaine argued. “And just because your friends and family are in England, that doesn’t mean you can’t make friends here, does it? And you’re an attractive, clever young woman. You shouldn’t be spending every waking hour working. “

“That’s a brilliant diagnosis,” Hermione said sarcastically.

Elaine wasn’t going to be deterred, however.

“You told me that as a child, you didn’t have friends,” Elaine said after consulting with her notes. “And that you always felt different…”

Hermione rolled her eyes.

“But that all changed when you went to Hogwarts,” Elaine said. “And you were befriended by Harry and Ron.”

Again, Hermione looked at her watch. “I really don’t see what this has to do with anything.”

“It has everything to do with the behavior you’re exhibiting now,” Elaine replied. “You became friends with those two boys and as a result, you became more open and you soon realized that life wasn’t just about…’books and cleverness’.”

Hermione bit her bottom lip to quell her anger. She absolutely abhorred it when someone used her words against her like this.

“That friendship changed you, Hermione,” Elaine continued. “And when Harry died, you closed yourself off again because you didn’t want to get hurt. But it’s been four years, Hermione. You weren’t responsible for---“

“I’m fine,” Hermione said finally meeting Elaine’s gaze. That had been her mantra these last few years. And she was fine. And what she was really getting tired of was people asking her how she was doing and giving her that sympathetic look every time they saw her. She was trying to move on, but they were the ones who kept bringing up the past. They wouldn’t let her forget.

“You’re fine?” Elaine questioned.

“I believe I would know,” Hermione said through clenched teeth.

“You’re not fine, Hermione,” Elaine said gently. “You’re avoiding. You’re avoiding your guilt over Harry’s death. You’re avoiding your friends and family. And if you truly want to recover from this, you need to realize…”

“I am not avoiding,” Hermione said defensively. “I still talk to my friends and family back home. And I go the library on my days off…”

“Hermione-“

Tears welled up in Hermione’s eyes, but she staved them off. She was not going to cry in front of Elaine. She wasn’t going to give this woman any more ammunition to use against her.

“He’s gone, Hermione,” Elaine said gently. “And life has to go on. He wouldn’t want you to---“

“Don’t you dare say that he wouldn’t want me to grieve for him,” Hermione interjected angrily. “You don’t know him. You never knew him and you wouldn’t know how he felt! And I’ll be damned if I’m going to sit here and listen to you tell me what you think he would have wanted!”

There was a part of Hermione that knew that what Elaine was saying was true, but she didn’t want to hear it. This therapy idea had been her mother’s plan and Hermione had agreed to it mainly to get her mother off her back. But, what good had it really done? She sat here for an hour and talked about her feelings; her childhood; her friendship with Harry and Ron. And she still walked out of here each and every time feeling just as empty as she did when she walked into the office.

Hermione knew that her mother would be disappointed in her for not seeing this through. But, she was an adult and she didn’t have to answer to her parents anymore. She’d just tell them that it didn’t work out and she was too busy for these weekly sessions. Her mother would understand.

“Hermione, I think we—“

“Our time is up,” Hermione said getting to her feet.

“So, I’ll see you next week?”

Hermione shook her head. “I don’t think so. Good day, Elaine.”

She managed to keep her tears at bay until she was alone in her car. Elaine Kinsella had no idea what she was talking about, Hermione thought as she pulled the visor down. As she did so, she caught sight of her tear-stained eyes and her pale skin. She looked like a ghost.

Harry would have hated to see me like this.

***********

She managed to make it to the hospital a little after ten and after checking in with the front desk to make sure there weren’t any emergencies, she took the lift up to her office. She had a few messages—mostly from colleagues seeking consultations. She quickly scribbled down her responses and sent them off via the hospital owl post.

Another message was from her mother wanting to know how she was doing. Hermione made a mental note to email her mother later that day to let her know that she was so fine she’d decided to forego therapy completely. She knew that would go over like a ton of bricks and she was glad that she wasn’t breaking it to her mother over the phone.

And everyone thinks I’m the stubborn one. They should meet my mum.

At the bottom of her stack of letters and messages was a letter from Ron and Luna Weasley. It had been a few weeks since she’d last spoken to them. They’d tried to convince her to come home for a visit and had even laid out a guilt trip on her for not meeting her one and a half-year old goddaughter.

It just hurt too much to be around Ron. It brought back way too many memories of Harry and every time she was with him, she’d feel as if something was missing. And even though he never said it or even implied it, she couldn’t help thinking that Ron blamed her for Harry’s death. It really was better for both of them if they were apart. They needed to heal.

Separating herself from Ron and the other Weasleys had been difficult. They’d become like a second family to her over the years and she genuinely missed them all. Even Ginny, though she hadn’t parted on the best of terms with the youngest Weasley.

Harry’s relationship with Ginny still confused Hermione. Yes, she’d tried to be a supportive friend to Ginny and told the girl that the best thing she could do was be herself and not act like some strange fan girl every time Harry was around. Little did Hermione know how well that would work when her best friend finally saw Ginny in a different light.

At first she’d been happy for them, but watching them together felt kind of…strange, for want of a better word. Someone else was taking her place with Harry. He now had someone else to confide in and though she didn’t begrudge Harry any happiness (Merlin knew he deserved it of all people), but it wasn’t easy to watch him with Ginny. And when you got down to it, they didn’t really have that much in common, really. A shared love of Quidditch. Hell, if that was the basis for a relationship, Harry and Ron would have gotten together, Hermione mused to herself.

Ginny had taken Hermione aside the day of Harry’s memorial service and wanted to know how Harry’s last days had been. When Hermione tried to tell her friend about how they spent most of their days traveling, doing research and looking for horcruxes, Ginny became impatient and interrupted Hermione.

”Did he talk a lot about me?” Ginny had asked hopefully. “We’d only just broken up, and I know he thought he was being noble…”

Hermione had already been on edge from lack of sleep and guilt, so she had snapped at her friend before she could stop herself. “He didn’t talk about you, Ginny. Okay? He had a lot more on his mind than whether or not he’d be back to take you to Hogsmeade!”

Ginny looked as if Hermione had slapped her and she’d stalked out of the room. That was the last conversation Hermione had with Ginny. She only knew of what was going on with her from Ron and Luna. They’d once been so close, like sisters. And now….as good as strangers.

“Hermione,” a voice called out, breaking Hermione away from her thoughts.

She looked up from her notes and smiled at her colleague, Shannon Cole. She was a petite woman in her early thirties and was the closest thing Hermione had to a friend at the hospital.

“What can I do for you, Shannon?”

“Help out in Emergency,” Shannon replied with a pleading look. “We’re short two healers and I think everyone in the great state of Washington is in the waiting room.”

Hermione quickly got to her feet and set aside her paperwork. “Of course.”

Shannon smiled in relief. “Thank you.”

Hermione let out a slight laugh. “How many times have you covered for me? I mean, this morning…”

Shannon waved her hand dismissively. “I was happy to do it. Rounds are a cake walk compared to Emergency.”

They walked down the corridor toward the lift and Shannon went over some things that had happened earlier that morning. Hermione was happy for the distraction.

When they arrived in the Emergency Ward, Hermione tried very hard not to wince at the number of patients that were sitting in the waiting room. Shannon hadn’t been kidding.

There was a large board over the admitting desk that listed the patients and cases that were already in the examining areas waiting to be seen. Hermione scanned the board with Shannon.

Vanishing sickness.

Possible wizarding flu.

Possible wizarding flu.

Possible wizarding flu.

Quidditch accident—multiple fractures.

Woman hearing voices; thinks husband tried to hex her.

“Quite a grab bag, huh?” Shannon asked thoughtfully.

Hermione nodded.

”Tell you what,” Shannon said. “I’ll take the flu cases and the woman hearing the voices if you take the Quidditch accident and the vanishing sickness…”

”Deal,” Hermione said. Since the vanishing sickness was probably not as serious as the multiple fractures, she decided to get him out of the way. She scanned his chart for the basics.

Patient: Luke Reilly, 22 year-old male. Injured during pickup Quidditch match.

“Hello, Mr. Reilly,” Hermione said politely as she pushed back the curtain. “I’m Healer Granger.”

Hermione’s eyes were still on his chart so she didn’t catch sight of him staring at her.

She wrote a few things down on the chart before she sat down at the edge of the bed. “It says here that you fell from your broom. Can you tell me what you landed on?”

Her patient didn’t respond and Hermione sighed as she finally looked up to meet his gaze. “Mr. Reilly?”

He had short brown hair and warm brown eyes and lightly tanned skin. Hermione wondered where he’d gotten a tan since it rained about as much here as it did in London. Her over-analytical mind hard at work yet again, she thought as she focused on her patient’s condition. One of the nurses had put his arm in a sling and his injured leg was propped up on some pillows.

“Mr. Reilly?”

The way he was looking at her was making her more than a little uncomfortable. “Mr. Reilly?”

She shook off her worries and wondered if perhaps he’d sustained a head injury in the fall which would account for his unresponsiveness.

“Sorry,” he finally muttered. “I-I guess I’m just a little out of it.”

“From the fall?”

He stared at her. “Oh...right…the fall…”

“When you fell, did you lose consciousness right after the fall?” Hermione asked in a business-like tone.

He shook his head.

”And you remember what happened before and after you fell?”

Again, Luke nodded.

“And how’s your vision?” Hermione asked.

“Fine,” Luke replied. “I wear contacts usually, but I don’t have them in today.” He drew back when she lit her wand and again leaned over him to get a look at his eyes. “Is that really necessary?”

“I’m checking for a concussion, Mr. Reilly,” Hermione said quietly.

“I didn’t land on my head,” Luke told her.

Hermione took a look at his scalp. “Okay…”

She went back to her chart and noted her findings while Luke continued to watch her. For a brief moment, she wondered if he was like some of those bizarre witches and wizards who faked sicknesses and injuries to get a chance to meet The Boy Who Lived’s best gal pal. They’d come in here with some bogus ailment and then pepper her with questions about Harry and what he was like. It was enough to make her want to scream.

She’d thought that the days of that happening were long gone, but apparently not. Her suspicions were seemingly confirmed with what he asked her next.

“How long have you been in Seattle?”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “A few years.”

Luke nodded. “Yeah, me too.”

“Great,” Hermione muttered, standing up again so she could examine his arm. She eased it out of the sling and performed a quick examination. Luke winced when she touched his arm, but tried to play it off. Despite herself, she couldn’t help the smile that played at her lips as she surreptitiously glanced at him.

“We’ll need to do some x-rays to see for sure, but I think you have a couple of fractures,” Hermione finally said.

“You’re not going to make me drink Skele-Gro, are you?” he asked.

“It really doesn’t taste that bad,” Hermione reassured him. “And it will help your bones heal much faster than regular rest, Mr. Reilly.”

Luke frowned. “I guess that’s okay. I mean, you’re the healer.”

“That’s right,” Hermione said writing down the orders on the chart.

Luke continued to watch her and Hermione looked angrily up from her notes.

”Yes?”

“What?” he asked innocently.

“Do you mind telling me why you’re staring at me?” she asked. “Hmm? Do you think its fun to waste my time and the time of the staff to deal with your ‘injury’? What paper are you with, hmm? I haven’t given any interviews on my friendship with Harry Potter and I don’t plan to so if that’s what you’re here for, well you can---“

Luke held up his good arm. “Hey! I’m not here to pick your brain about Harry Potter. I hate hospitals. Always have, always will. I certainly wouldn’t be here unless it was absolutely necessary. I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea…”

Hermione blushed. “I-I’m sorry. I just thought…”

“But I am pretty thrilled that I happened to get the cleverest witch of her generation working on me,” Luke said with a grin.

Hermione didn’t know what to say to this. “I—I think it might be a good idea to keep you overnight for observation. Just to make sure that you haven’t sustained a concussion…”

“Is that---“

Hermione cut him off. “Yes, I think it’s for the best and I promise you it will only be overnight. And we’d like to monitor you while you’re taking the Skele-Gro.”

Luke nodded. “Great.”

“I’m just going to go and put this request in with the front desk,” Hermione said closing his chart. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Luke said leaning back against the pillows, in an effort to get comfortable. Hermione gave him one last look before walking back out into the hall. It had been quite some time since she’d found someone attractive. It had been quite some time since she’d given much thought to it, but she supposed that Luke Reilly was an attractive sort. Even if the way he was staring at her was a bit strange.

She scheduled a time for his x-rays and then requested the Skele-Gro to be given to him in two hour intervals over the next 24 hours. Before she checked in on her next patient, she decided to see how he was doing.

“They’ll be moving you upstairs in a few minutes,” Hermione told him. “And I’ll check on you after you’ve had your x-rays.”

Luke nodded. “So I’ll see you again?”

Hermione looked over at him.

“I mean, you know my case now and I don’t think I’d be that comfortable with anyone else taking over now,” Luke stammered. For some reason, this didn’t set off bells and whistles in Hermione’s brain. She found it endearing.

“For your stay at St. Montague’s, I will be your assigned Healer,” Hermione reassured him.

He smiled at her and she found herself smiling back at him.

“Do you mind me asking, why you became a healer?” Luke suddenly asked. Hermione had almost been out the door when he’d said that, but she stopped.

She’d been asked this question so many times over that past couple of years. And she’d always given the expected answer that she wanted to make a difference. Which was true, but it wasn’t the whole story. She certainly wasn’t going to tell a total stranger the real reason she’d become a healer. She’d wanted more than anything to feel as if she could help someone even if she couldn’t help her best friend when he needed her most. This job made her feel like she was doing something to honor Harry’s memory.

“My parents are dentists,” Hermione said instead. “I guess I sort of followed in their footsteps.”

He studied her for a few moments. “I would have thought you’d have gone into politics. From what I know of you, there was talk that someday you might be your country’s next Minister.”

Hermione shook her head. That had been her goal in what seemed like a lifetime ago, but things had changed in more ways than one with Harry’s death. “This was my calling. I’m much more suited to this than anything else, Mr. Reilly.”

He looked as if he wanted to ask her something else, but he remained silent.

“I’ll see you in awhile,” Hermione said.

Luke nodded. “Um, could you ask the nurse to get my friend for me? He brought me to the hospital…”

“I can get him for you,” Hermione said. “What’s his name?”

“Sean Truman,” Luke replied. “Goofy looking man who will probably tell you this accident was all my fault.”

Hermione left the room and Luke again tried to get comfortable. A few moments later his friend walked into the room.

“I really am sorry,” Sean said apologetically. “But you wanted to make it seem real…”

Luke nodded. “Yeah, she would have seen through a fake right away.”

“She’s something else,” Sean said with a grin. “A bit serious, but quite pretty in a bookish sort of way.”

Luke glared at him.

“Ease up,” Sean said holding up his hand. “I’m very happy with Kate. No need to worry about me trying to pick up some doctor. That’s your M.O., buddy.”

“I didn’t come here to pick her up,” Luke said in a hushed tone. For all he knew, Hermione was standing outside the curtain listening to every word they said. “I just came to see how she was doing.”

“And?”

“She’s…she’s different,” Luke said thoughtfully. “Maybe I shouldn’t have come…I just wanted to see how she was…”

“And now that you have?” Sean asked.

“I feel worse,” Luke admitted. “What kind of person does this---“

”You had your reasons,” Sean said loyally.

“She’s not going to buy that,” Luke said shaking his head. “You were right. I shouldn’t have done this.”

“Since when have you listened to anything I have to say?” Sean asked jokingly. “You do what you want. You always have.”

“Not always,” Luke said his breath catching in his throat as he spotted Hermione walking past the curtain, deep in conversation with another woman.

“You’re as stubborn as they come,” Sean said.

“You haven’t met Hermione Granger yet,” Luke said wistfully.

“And now that Luke Reilly has met her…” Sean said his voice trailing off.

“He doesn’t know what the hell to do,” Luke said honestly. “Not by a long shot.”

3. Fall Away

Author’s note: So sorry for the delay in updates! Real life kind of intruded in on my free time and prevented me from writing. I hope you like this new chapter---you get insight into what’s going on in Luke Reilly’s head. Please read and review.

You swear you recall nothing at all
That could make you come back down
You made up your mind to leave it all behind
Now you're forced to fight it out

You fall away from your past
But it's following you

You left something undone, it's now your rerun
It's the one you can't erase
You should have made it right, so you wouldn't have to fight
To put a smile back on your face

You fall away from your past
But it's following you
You fall away

Something I've done that I can't outrun
Maybe you should wait maybe you should run
But there's something you've said that can't be undone

And you fall away from your past
But It's following you

You fall away
It's following you

(Fall Away, by The Fray)

Luke Reilly leaned back in the uncomfortable hospital bed and again wondered why he’d ever thought that this would be a good idea. Yes, he’d wanted to see her and yes, he’d been curious as to how her life was going, but there were other ways to go about this; other ways that didn’t involve breaking bones and drinking the most horrid liquid on the planet.

It would have been a lot less painful and a lot more pleasant if he’d just made an appointment and gone to see her like a normal, sane person. But, he hadn’t been able to do that; not after all that had happened. For one thing, she probably would have thrown him out on his ear.

Who am I kidding? She would have hexed me. No…that would have been too easy. She would have…well, I always said I was glad I wasn’t on her bad side, and now the thought of what she would do if she truly knew what had happened makes me shudder in fear.

But, no, he hadn’t gone about this the sane, reasonable way. No, he’d decided to have his best friend knock him off his broom. He’d been in considerable pain since the moment his body had hit the ground. And Sean had tried to tell him this was in his words, ‘the Super Bowl of bad ideas’. But, as usual, Luke hadn’t listened.

He was always one to act first, think about it later. That was one of the things that she’d always called him on when they were kids. But, just like then, he hadn’t paid attention or cared about the consequences.

That was, he hadn’t cared about the consequences until he’d finally seen her and realized how much damage he’d actually done. That light was gone from her eyes. One of his favorite memories of her was how her eyes would light up when she talked about something or someone she cared about. It was gone though, and he knew he was the reason.

He’d been thinking about this for over a year since his recovery. Courage had been in short supply in those days. Luke had thought long and hard about confronting her. He’d even had nightmares about how she’d react upon seeing him and how she’d feel when she found out the horrible truth.

The plan had called for him to visit the hospital and see how she was doing, how she was feeling and then if everything was okay, he’d go about his life and let her go about hers. All he’d wanted was to see for himself that she was getting on with her life.

He’d have thought she’d have been married by now. But, according to the night nurse, she didn’t have a boyfriend and kept pretty much to herself. The nurse had called Healer Granger a workaholic. Luke had expected as much given what he knew about Hermione Jane Granger, but he’d also expected her to have friends, to have a life outside of her work.

But from what he gathered, she worked and that was pretty much it. Come to think of it, that was how he’d been when he’d first awoken last year. Sean and the others had helped him get better and it had been a long road back. Would she understand? Could she understand? How would he even begin to explain to her?

Despite what she’d said to him in the emergency room, she hadn’t been back to check on him. He’d seen a couple of nurses and the healer on call, but no Hermione. He was about to give up hope when he heard a knock on the door. He turned his head and was disappointed to see Doreen, the night nurse.

“One more glass should do it, honey,” she said handing him a tall glass of Skele-Gro. Luke scrunched up his nose in disgust.

”Can I have a beer instead?” Luke asked giving her his most winsome smile. “Or a glass of milk? Orange juice? Soda? Anything, but this?”

Doreen laughed and set the glass before him. “In the time you’ve spent complaining about it, you could have finished it…”

Luke picked up the glass and took a whiff of it. He couldn’t understand why with all the advancements in magic and in healing potions, they hadn’t been able to find some way to make this stuff easy to take. At the very least, they could do something about the smell.

“Luke, drink,” Doreen ordered.

“Did anyone ever tell you that you have great bedside manner?” Luke asked sarcastically.

“I do have great bedside manner, especially when my patients aren’t acting like two-year olds,” Doreen said simply, picking up his chart and writing down the treatment she’d just given him.

Luke groaned. “This is cruel and unusual punishment.”

“Cruel and unusual punishment?” a familiar voice said from the doorway. Luke looked over and couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across his face as he saw her.

“Healer Granger,” Luke said setting the glass back down on the bedside table. “I didn’t think you’d be back.”

“I’m about to leave for the evening,” Hermione said taking the chart from Doreen. “I wanted to see how you were doing before I left.”

“He’s being a baby about the Skele-Gro,” Doreen told her.

Hermione nodded. “If he doesn’t drink it, we could always inject it…”

The smile on Luke’s face fell. “Inject it? As in a…shot?”

Again, Hermione nodded. She tried not to laugh at the stricken look on his face. Luke picked up the glass again. “I’m going to drink it.”

Hermione folded her arms and looked challengingly at him. “Anytime now, Mr. Reilly.”

Luke brought the glass to his lips, silently cursing Sean for doing his job just a little too well. He glanced over at Hermione and he was again struck by how much he’d missed her. She had that same concerned look she’d perfected with him over the years. It used to bother him at times thinking that she thought he couldn’t take care of himself. She was always the one to remind him to study for the test or to finish writing that essay. She was always the one to remind him to put on an extra jumper or sweatshirt so he wouldn’t catch cold. She was the one who always told him to go to the hospital wing or to tell someone when he had a troubling dream. Funny how those things that used to grate on his nerves were some of the things he’d missed so much about her. He’d taken her for granted over the years and he’d not realized how much until she wasn’t around. It was a mistake that he hoped to one day make up for her. If she’d let him, that is.

“Drink,” Hermione restated firmly. “Now.”

Luke set the glass back down on the table before him. “Listen, I really am feeling much better. Really, it barely hurts now. I think all I need is a good night’s sleep and I’ll be fine.”

“You can’t sleep,” Hermione told him. “You have a concussion, Mr. Reilly.”

“You don’t know that,” Luke argued.

“I think I’m more inclined to know than you,” Hermione said. “You took a nasty fall and in the emergency room you were acting a little out of it. That is classic concussion, Mr. Reilly.”

No. That is how you react when you see someone that you hadn’t seen in years and that you couldn’t believe was standing before you now with no clue as to who you really were. Who can blame me for acting like a complete, brain-dead idiot?

“It’s not,” Luke tried to reassure her. “Really, I think---“

”Drink,” Hermione said folding her arms.

“Okay,” Luke said glaring at her before picking up the glass. The smell was almost unbearable, but he tipped the glass and began to drink, almost choking as the atrocious liquid went down his throat. Hermione’s eagle eyes were trained on him as she watched him drain the glass.

When he was finished, Luke set the glass down on the table and winced as the awful taste seemed to stay on his tongue. “Yech…yech…yech….”

“Thank you,” Doreen said taking the glass. “Such a big boy.”

Luke forced a smile. “That’s me.”

Hermione shook her head as she wrote down something on his chart before placing it back on the hook on the door. Doreen promised Luke that she’d be back later that evening to check on him before she left the room.

“Where’s your friend?” Hermione asked.

“I’m not really so sure he’s my friend anymore,” Luke said trying to get comfortable.

“I’m sure he feels just as bad as you do for the accident,” Hermione said looking at her watch.

“Yes, well he’s not the one in the hospital now, is he?” Luke asked dryly.

Hermione smiled. “No, I suppose not. But you shouldn’t be so hard on him.”

Luke nodded and smiled at her. “He had to go into work. I’m on my own.”

“Oh,” Hermione said. “Well, it’s usually a good idea to have someone stay with you so you won’t be tempted to fall asleep.”

Luke smiled to himself. He’d been afraid that she was about to leave and he’d been wracking his brain for some excuse to keep her there. It was funny how help arrived when you needed it the most, he mused. “You could do it.”

Hermione pulled a surprised face.

“Just for a few minutes,” Luke continued before she could think of an excuse as to why she couldn’t. “I mean, you’re shift is over right?”

“Technically---“

Luke nodded. “And you could…you could help me with my dinner….” He motioned with his head to the tray of food on his bedside table. “The broken arm kind of makes it difficult to… you know…”

“Oh,” Hermione said quickly. She walked over to the bedside table and picked up the tray setting it on the tray table before him.

Luke caught the scent of her shampoo as she did so. It was just like he’d remembered; a cinnamon-y type scent that reminded him of…home. She really had grown into a beautiful woman. She caught him staring at her and her cheeks turned pink.

“Um, how is the food here?” Luke asked hastily. The thoughts he was having were a little disturbing. This was Hermione Granger, his pal---or former pal.

“It’s not too bad,” Hermione said uncovering the tray to reveal a plate of grilled chicken, boiled potatoes, steamed vegetables and a roll. “You’re in luck. No mystery meat.”

“Mystery meat?”

Hermione nodded. “It’s a little hard to explain, really. Word on the street says its meatloaf, but I’m not so sure. I mean, is meatloaf supposed to be crunchy?”

Luke laughed. “Well this looks harmless enough…”

He picked up his fork and tried to cut the chicken, which was quite difficult given that he couldn’t use the knife. Hermione took pity on him and took the silverware, cutting the chicken into small bites. He hated seeming so helpless in front of her. “Thanks,” he said quietly.

“No problem,” she said looking at him as if she understood exactly what he was thinking. She had always been able to do that.

“So,” Hermione said conversationally. “What do you do?”

“You mean other than falling off of brooms and nearly killing myself?” Luke asked.

“Yes, other than that,” Hermione said taking a seat beside his bed.

“Well,” Luke began. “As busy as that keeps me, it doesn’t pay the bills. So, I had to get a proper job. I work at the community center on Ryland Street.”

Hermione smiled. “That’s nice. What do you do there?”

“I’m in charge of the sports programs,” he replied. “Mostly basketball, but we do some soccer---or as you’d know it---football.”

“Muggles?”

Luke nodded. He wasn’t ready to tell her everything that had happened to him in the past few years. It wasn’t something he liked talking about or reliving, but at some point, she was going to want answers. He just hoped he’d be strong enough to give them to her.

“You should stop in sometime,” Luke offered.

And just like that, she went back into defensive mode. “That’s really nice of you, but I don’t think I can---“

He cursed himself for pushing too hard too soon.

“You can’t work all the time,” he countered. He wasn’t ready to let this go without a fight. He’d put it out there and all that she had to do was accept.

“Well, no, but my job takes up a great deal of my time, Mr. Reilly,” Hermione said shifting uncomfortably in her chair.

“You know what they say about all work and no play,” Luke said with a cheeky grin.

Hermione nodded. “Yes, but there’s also a saying about idle hands…”

“Come on,” Luke said pleadingly. “You can spare an hour or two. It could even be on the weekend if you like---“

He could see her thinking this over in her head and already weighing the pros and cons of it. She wasn’t going to accept. But, he wasn’t going to be deterred. She had to get out of this hospital and start living again. All she needed was a gentle push in the right direction.

“Mr. Reilly---“

“Luke,” he corrected.

“It’s a very nice invitation, Luke,” Hermione said quietly. “But I really can’t accept.”

“Yes you can,” Luke said with a grin. “Come on…it’s easy. Just say, ‘Yes, Luke. I’d love to see where you work’.”

Despite herself, Hermione laughed. “Why is this so important to you?”

“Because,” Luke deflected. “I just want to repay you for your kindness and you could see the center and---I’ll even treat you to lunch. I can’t promise much---it’d probably just be a sandwich or something in the snack room, but I’ll even buy you a soda.”

“I—--“

“You know you want to,” he said turning on the charm full blast. “Please?”

“It’s against hospital policy for staff and patients to date,” Hermione said.

“Well, that’s good,” Luke said. “Because I wasn’t asking you out on a date. I was asking you on an outing to see where I work and maybe talk to the kids. I mean, it’s as far from a date as you could possibly get.”

Hermione’s cheeks turned red and she looked away.

“All I ask is that you think about it,” Luke said.

“I suppose I could,” Hermione finally said. “I mean…it would be nice to talk to the children.”

”Fantastic,” Luke said beaming at her before tucking into his dinner. He could feel Hermione watching him and he felt a little uncomfortable. She was the smartest, cleverest person he’d ever met and she didn’t miss much. What if he slipped up and gave it all away before he had the chance to explain?

“You sure you don’t want any of this?” Luke offered.

Hermione shook her head. “I was going to grab something to eat on my way home.”

“Okay,” Luke said good-naturedly. “But don’t say that I wasn’t a gentleman.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Hermione said looking at her watch again.

“You---you don’t have to stay here and babysit me,” Luke told her. “I mean I wouldn’t mind the company, of course, but I know that you’re busy and you’ve been working all day.”

Sensing her opportunity to go, she stood up. She reached into her pocket and gave him a card. “You can send me the details about when you’d want to get together. I’ll have to clear my schedule so if you could let me know soon…”

“I will,” Luke promised. “Thanks again, Healer Granger.”

Hermione had almost been out the door, but she turned and looked thoughtfully at him. “Um, if I’m going to call you Luke, I suppose it would be alright if you called me Hermione.”

“I’d like that,” Luke said smiling at her.

And with that, she walked away.

Luke sighed heavily as he contemplated exactly what he was doing here. He was playing with fire and he’d learned the hard way that when you did that you always got burned. He’d just wanted to reconnect with his friend and if she found out who he really was, she’d hate him. Of that, he had no doubt.

So, he made a promise to himself, that he’d be her friend again and get her to see that she had a wonderful life ahead of her. And once he’d accomplished that, he’d leave her alone. It was the least he could do after all that she’d done for him.

**********

Hermione made her way back downstairs to her office. What had she just done? This was completely unprofessional behavior. She was going to see a patient outside of the hospital. Even though he’d said it wasn’t a date, it certainly had that vibe. And she’d not been on a date in---she couldn’t really remember.

It wasn’t that people weren’t always trying to set her up with someone else. That’s what people who were married did. They saw a single person and automatically seemed to volunteer a friend, coworker or neighbor that would of course be “perfect” for her. She’d rather have her teeth drilled then go on a blind date.

Get over yourself, Hermione. It’s not a date. He’d said so.

But there was something about Luke Reilly. She just couldn’t put her finger on what exactly that made her check in on him before she’d left for the day. Truth be told, she could have just pawned that assignment off on the healer on call. But seemingly against her own volition, she’d found herself traveling up the lift to go and see her mysterious new patient. Even more troubling, she’d found herself talking to him and actually enjoying herself.

Chances were, he would forget all about her by the time he was discharged tomorrow morning. She’d probably never hear from him again. He was probably one of those blokes who flirted with any female in sight.

Case closed.

She let herself into her office and took off her lab coat, carefully hanging it on the back of the door.

Ron’s letter.

She’d forgotten all about it. She took the envelope out of her lab coat and slowly opened it.

Dear Hermione:

Hope that things are going well for you in Seattle. Still can’t believe that of all the cities in America you chose the one whose weather is close to good old London! If it had been me, I’d have taken my pasty arse to Miami and turned into a right old beach bum. Luna says we might do that when we get older. Apparently that’s what all old people do---retire and go to a warm climate.

I do hope that you are doing okay and not spending every waking hour in that hospital. You should get out and have fun and maybe go out with someone! I’m sure that some poor soul in Seattle is looking for a brainy know-it-all. I happen to be quite fond of them myself!

Hermione---I know we keep asking you to come back for a visit and you keep turning us down. But, Sage is going to be a teenager before you know it and you’ll have missed out on all of it. Just promise me that you’ll think about it. Christmas isn’t the same without you and I like to think my present giving has improved over the past few years---no cheap perfume this time I promise.

Luna and Sage send their love!

Take care,

Ron

Hermione sank into her chair. Ron was right. Her goddaughter was growing up and she was missing every single milestone. She’d tried to tell them that this was a bad idea, but they’d said there was no one they trusted more with their daughter. And this was how she’d repaid them.

Hermione took a deep breath and then pulled out a piece of paper. She thought long and hard about all that she wanted to say to her best friend.

Dear Ron, Luna, and Sage:

I was really happy to get your letter. Things have been pretty hectic for me at the hospital. The work has been very demanding, but it’s also been quite rewarding. I’m currently working on a journal article and will send you both a copy as soon as it’s published.

I can’t make any promises, but I will try to make it home this year for Christmas. You must be working with my parents to convince me.

Thanks for the pictures of Sage you sent last month. She’s growing up so fast. And thankfully, she seems to have inherited her looks from her mother.

I will try and write more when I’m not so busy. Take care of yourselves and please extend my regards to your family, Ron.

Love,

Hermione

She sealed the envelope and set it on her desk for her secretary to send out with the post tomorrow. It wasn’t much, but it was something. And for now, that would just have to do.

4. In My Life

Author’s note: I am so sorry for the delay in updates. I lost my muse on this one and I’ve been busy with Heaven writing Last Dance. I do hope to be more diligent on my updates on this one and I promise you will not have to wait too much longer for another update! Thank you all so much for reading and to my friends and readers in the United States---Happy Thanksgiving!

Chapter Four

In My Life

There are places I'll remember
All my life though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places have their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more

(The Beatles, In My Life)

It had been an extremely long day and Luke Reilly was storing some sports equipment from that day’s basketball games. His mind hadn’t really been on the work though and he felt guilty for not concentrating enough on his job.

This place had been his saving grace the last year. It was here that he finally felt he was doing something instead of hiding out. It was here that he tried to make a life for himself, even if it wasn’t his.

Luke Reilly.

He wasn’t even sure who that really was. Someone who was normal, but who hid a deep, dark secret? Someone who wanted to make up in some small way for the pain he’d caused his friends?

Not a day had gone by that he hadn’t thought of them. He wondered how Ron was doing as a new father. Sean had been able to get him the newspapers from overseas and he’d managed to find out that his best friend had married Luna Lovegood. Who would have thought that would have happened?

To tell the truth, he’d expected to hear about Ron marrying Hermione. He’d known since fourth year how his best friend felt about their favourite girl. Though, Ron was loathsome to admit it. And Harry wasn’t stupid enough to call him on it. And truth be told, he wasn’t quite sure how he felt about his two friends becoming a couple. They were as different as night and day and fought so effortlessly it was as natural to them as breathing.

His biggest concern in those days had been that he’d be left out. And that if something happened where Ron and Hermione broke up; he’d feel like a child of divorce, alternating between mum and dad for visits. He was in the middle enough as it is whenever the two of them fought, with each of them expecting him to take sides.

But when everything had come to a head, Ron and Hermione were finally warming up to the idea of being an actual couple. And then they’d learned about the horcruxes and Dumbledore was killed and it put everything on hold. It was something else that he felt guilty about, but his two friends never wavered in their loyalty toward him. They’d followed him and stood by him without question.

He thought about them everyday---what they were doing and he even longed to be on the receiving end of one of Hermione’s lectures. That wasn’t something he’d ever thought he’d hear himself say.

There were so many things that he missed about his old life, but none more important than his friends. He knew the surface things, of course, because of Sean’s research. For example, he knew that Dean Thomas was working as a graphic designer for some hip London magazine. He knew that Seamus Finnigan worked for the Ministry and he knew that Lavender Brown wrote a gossip column for the Daily Prophet.

And he knew that Ginny Weasley was currently interning for Madam Malkin’s. She’d once confessed to him how she had no idea what she’d wanted to do with the rest of her life. She toyed with professional Quidditch, but in the end, her heart wasn’t in it. One night in the common room, she’d even shown him some of her sketches and though he knew nothing about fashion, he’d thought she was quite talented and had told her so. That, of course, had led to a lengthy snogging session.

But when he thought about the past and all that he’d left behind, she wasn’t at the forefront of his thoughts. Their relationship, if you could call it that, given how long it had actually lasted, was more of a physical one. And he couldn’t help feeling that she acted as if she’d won a prize when they’d started dating. His feelings for her had come out of nowhere. One day he thought of her like a kid sister and the next he was jealous of her relationship with Dean and hoping that one day, she’d be his. Ginny was beautiful, of that there was no doubt, but he’d never felt like he could talk to her…really, talk to her.

And Dumbledore’s death had confirmed for him what he’d known all along. Being with him was like a death wish for those he cared about. And he didn’t want Ginny’s death on his hands---or Ron and Hermione’s, for that matter. He wouldn’t have been able to live with himself. But, Ron and Hermione hadn’t wavered in their devotion and loyalty to him and he knew that he wouldn’t be able to get through what he had to without him. Yet, when he had faced Voldemort that last time, he had been completely on his own. And he had nearly died.

That wasn’t something he really wanted to think about now. One day, if she was still speaking to him, perhaps he’d tell her. But right now, it was just good to have her back in his life again. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed her until he’d seen her that first time at the hospital.

He opened one of his desk drawers and pulled out the photo he’d kept with him. It was really the only memento he had of his former life. He looked at the three teenagers staring back at him. They had no idea what was to come. They had no idea what was going to happen.

This had been the beginning of the end----the last real moment of peace; the calm before the storm.

Hermione in the photograph waved at him before putting her arms around Ron and Harry pulling them both close for a hug. Harry couldn’t get over how happy they’d looked on that day.

Fred and George were hunched in the corner of the garden plotting Merlin knew what to prank their big brother on his wedding day. Ron had tried to get in on it, but the twins had told him in no uncertain terms that the less he knew the better and that they didn’t really want him stealing their glory.

The ceremony was now over and the happy couple was dancing together cheek to cheek in the middle of the makeshift dance floor Molly had transfigured in the garden.

“I guess I should be happy that they’re not picking on me for once,” Ron mused to Harry and Hermione.

Hermione laughed. “Don’t worry. I’m sure they’ll be back to you before too long. You are their favorite guinea pig.”

“I’m going to get something else to eat,” Ron said standing up. “You two want anything?”

“As if you’d remember to bring us anything,” Hermione said.

“I would,” Ron retorted.

“Wouldn’t,” Hermione countered.

”Would.”

“Wouldn’t.”

Ron rolled his eyes before walking away toward the buffet table.

Hermione shook her head and looked at Harry. “Mini-sandwiches. Those gherkin things he loves so much. And his mum’s brownies. We may never, ever see him again.”

Harry hadn’t heard Hermione or Ron’s argument. His eyes were on the red-haired girl dancing with Neville Longbottom. Neville looked as if he’d just won the lottery and Ginny kept shooting surreptitious glances at Harry.

Hermione smiled slightly at Harry. “You could ask her to dance.”

“Hmm?”

“Ginny,” Hermione said. “You could ask her to dance. You, um, really look like you want to.”

Harry shook his head and took a sip of his drink. “I’m not much for dancing, Hermione.”

“Why do all blokes say that?” Hermione asked. “I mentioned possibly dancing to Ron and he looked as if I’d ask him to run around the garden starkers singing the latest Weird Sisters song.”

Harry finally cracked as mile and Hermione grinned triumphantly at him.

“You and your feet will be grateful for that later,” Harry joked. “Truth be told, Ron’s worse than me at dancing.”

Hermione put her hand to her chest in dramatic fashion. “Trash talking about your best friend? Well, I’ll have you know that Parvati is still talking about the damage you did to her poor feet during the Yule Ball.”

“I danced with her ONE time,” Harry said defensively.

“Apparently that was one time too many as she still has this slight limp when she walks,” Hermione said trying to keep a straight face.

Harry looked at her. “Hermione! She does not!”

“Poor girl couldn’t walk for a month…”

Harry nudged her. “Okay, you are exaggerating for dramatic effect. Very funny, Granger. Didn’t know you had it in you.”

”You and Ron don’t give me enough credit.”

Harry grinned before standing up and holding out his hand.

“What?”

“You are going to see firsthand that I’m not that bad,” Harry said crooking his finger at her. “Come on.”

Hermione laughed and shook her head. “I don’t think my poor feet can take it.”

“Chicken,” Harry countered.

Hermione rolled her eyes. “Okay, Potter. But the first time you step on my toes…”

“Just shut up and dance with me,” Harry said pulling her to her feet.

Under Ginny’s watchful eyes, Harry led Hermione out onto the dance floor. Harry honestly didn’t know what he was doing. He was terrible at this and he would probably end up embarrassing himself and breaking Hermione’s toes in the process. But, he had a feeling that this might be the last evening he would be able to concentrate on little more than having a good time. He was going to take advantage of it.

The band played a soft, romantic song and Harry awkwardly put his hands on Hermione’s waist, avoiding her gaze. He could feel Ginny watching them and he wondered why Ginny just didn’t let him go. This really was for the best. She’d be safe without him. She deserved to have someone in her life that would be able to love her like she needed. Someone who would have time to do all those boyfriend-girlfriend things that she longed for them to do. Harry couldn’t do that and he was sorry he had ever led her to believe they could have something like that.

He was starting to wonder if perhaps that kind of normalcy wasn’t meant for someone like him. He wasn’t normal. He hadn’t been normal and probably never would be. He had the fate of the wizarding world on his shoulders and he wondered how they’d all feel if they realized he was scared to death.

“Harry?”

Hermione looked up at him. “Where’d you go just then?”

He gave out a nervous laugh. “I uh---“

The way she was looking at him told him she could see right through him. She knew exactly what he was feeling. She really could read him like a book.

“You’re actually not bad at this,” Hermione said, surprising him because he had thought she was going to call him on his thoughts and ask him to talk about what he was feeling.

Harry shrugged. “You’re just saying that.”

“No,” Hermione said softly. “I’m not. You’re quite good, actually.”

Harry laughed. “You sure you didn’t have some of that punch Fred and George spiked?”

Hermione shook her head. “No. I’m saying this completely sober. Though, to be honest, I only have to compare you to Viktor since he’s the only other bloke I’ve danced with. Well, him and my dad.”

Harry hadn’t asked Hermione how her parents took the news about her not going back to school. Given what little he knew of the Grangers, he had a feeling that they weren’t too happy about it. But he hadn’t brought that up with Hermione because every time he tried, she took it to mean that he didn’t have any confidence in her capabilities and didn’t want her along. Even though she had to know by now how much he thought of her. He knew he wouldn’t have made it this far without her and someday he hoped to tell her that.

“You’re quite good too,” Harry said smiling at her. “Though to be honest, I haven’t had that much experience with this either. And you had such a glowing review of my abilities from Parvati.”

“Next time I see her, I’ll be sure to tell her how you’ve improved,” Hermione promised. She smiled up at him. “What?”

“Ron’s a lucky bloke, Hermione.”

Hermione blushed. “Harry---“

“He is,” Harry continued. “I hope he realizes how lucky.”

“I-I’m not really sure what he and I are really,” Hermione admitted. “It’s so strange and it’s hard to go from---we, um, we don’t have to talk about this now.”

Harry nodded. He still wasn’t so sure how he felt about his two best friends dating, but he didn’t begrudge them one bit of happiness. He just hoped that if anything should happen to break them up, the three of them could remain friends.

“We have a lot ahead of us,” Hermione commented. “We can figure everything else out afterwards.”

“Afterwards.”

Hermione nodded. “There will be an afterwards, Harry. You have to believe that.”

And when she said that, he almost believed her.

“Oi, Harry!” Ron called out. “Hermione! Come on over here! Angelina’s taking pictures!”

Hermione smiled and took Harry’s hand. “Come on, handsome. Let’s go have our picture taken.”

Harry couldn’t help smiling back at her. He’d think about the battle tomorrow. Right now, he was going to concentrate on having a good time with the two most important people in his life.

“Hermione, you get in the middle,” Angelina directed as the three friends sat down on the bench. “And Ron, you have some icing on your lip.”

Ron reached up and hastily wiped at his mouth with his sleeve. Hermione rolled her eyes.

“What?” Ron asked innocently.

“Nothing,” Hermione said shaking her head and laughing.

Harry smiled as Hermione put an arm around each of them. Would they ever be like this again when it was over? His smile faltered a bit, but with one look from Hermione, he tampered down his doubts and smiled brightly for the camera.

You couldn’t get away with much when Hermione Granger was your best friend.

**** ****

The next day, Hermione stood just outside the community center and contemplated getting back in her car. There was so much more she could be doing right now.

But she had promised Luke and she did have the afternoon off, a rare occasion in her line of work. She’d come straight from the hospital. She wondered if perhaps she was a little overdressed. Her grey trousers and periwinkle blue jumper were fine for the hospital but probably not for the community center. But then again, it wasn’t as if she was going to play basketball or anything. At least, she hoped not.

This was crazy, Hermione thought.

Just go inside and get it over with and then you can go back to your apartment and work on the article.

“You planning on staying outside all day?” someone asked from behind her.

Hermione turned to see Luke smiling up at her from the bottom of the steps.

“Um, I was…well, I was, well…”

He grinned at her. “Waiting for me?”

Hermione blushed and nodded. “Right.”

“Well, either way,” Luke said. “I’m really glad you showed. I was worried that you wouldn’t.”

Hermione didn’t reply to that. Truth be told, she’d spent most of the morning trying to think up excuses for why she wouldn’t be able to come. But, in the end, she’d decided to just suck it up and go. She was a horrible liar anyway and he’d probably see through her.

Hermione let out a weak laugh. “I’m a little early.”

He smiled at her in such a way that she felt a slight flutter in her stomach. She wrote it off to her lunch not agreeing with her. That was the logical answer.

Luke hurried up the steps past her and held the door open for her. “Ladies first.”

“Thanks,” Hermione said avoiding looking at him as she stepped into the community center. It was already bustling with activity. Hermione could hear the sounds of children talking and laughing and milling about.

“Let me just put this away and I can give you the grand tour,” Luke said holding up the file in his hand.

Hermione nodded and followed him down the corridor. It was a small building but it felt quite homey, Hermione thought as she looked around. She realized that Luke was talking to her and she focused her attention on what he was saying. He told her about how he’d only been here for a year or so and that he felt as if this was what he was meant to do.

“Did you go to college?” Hermione asked conversationally.

“Not much of a student,” Luke replied sheepishly. “They don’t give degrees in slacking, do they?”

Hermione grinned. “If they did my friend Ron would be a Ph.D.”

Since he was walking in front of her, she didn’t notice the wistful look that came across his handsome features at the mention of Ron Weasley.

“I imagine I got on his nerves though always trying to get him to study and lecturing him when he and Harry would try to copy my homework.”

“I’m sure they didn’t mind,” Luke told her turning and smiling at her. “In fact, I bet it helped them out more than they could ever tell you.”

Hermione looked quizzically at him. “You think so?”

Luke nodded. “What is it they say? Behind every great man, there’s a great woman kicking him in the ass telling him to get his act together?”

“I like that,” Hermione grinned. The apprehension she’d felt about coming here was starting to ebb and she liked talking to Luke. “So you’ve been here a year?”

“About that long,” Luke replied leading her into his office. It was quite small, but there was a plastic basketball hoop against the door and a number of pictures that some of the smaller children had drawn for him. A desk that was cluttered with files and some books was pushed against one wall. There was an old sofa that needed a bit of patch work, but the place seemed warm and inviting. “I can’t imagine doing anything else.”

Hermione smiled. “That’s the way I feel about medicine, actually. I like the idea of helping people.”

“We have that in common,” Luke said smiling back at her.

There was something in the way he was smiling at her that unnerved her. “Um, so about that tour…”

“Right,” Luke said nodding. “Right this way, Healer Granger.”

Hermione followed him out and listened intently as he pointed out different rooms and explained about the programs the community center offered.

“Upstairs, we have a couple of spare rooms where the kids can get help on their homework if they need it,” Luke explained. “A couple of neighborhood groups donated some computers and some books so that helps a lot.”

“Do you have just Muggle children?” Hermione asked.

“Mostly,” Luke replied. “But there are a few children who are magical. “

“Must be kind of hard trying to hide things,” Hermione commented, causing Luke to stop in his tracks.

“Luke?”

“Um,” Luke said scratching his nape. “Some secrets are necessary. You know, for the greater good…”

Hermione nodded. “Yes, but it would be hard to be on your toes all the time trying to make sure that you didn’t slip up and didn’t make a mistake. Believe me, I know. I was the only witch in my family. My parents didn’t tell anyone outside of my grandparents what I truly was. So, whenever we had family gatherings, I had to remember all these little details we’d make up to cover it up. What about you? What’s your family like?”

He didn’t answer her at first and Hermione looked quizzically at him. He was hiding something.

“My parents were magical,” he finally replied. “But I didn’t grow up with them. Look, I really don’t like talking about it all that much.”

”Oh,” Hermione said taken aback. “I didn’t mean to pry, Luke.”

He gave her a half smile. “It’s okay. But, the family I did grow up with, they …they did like to hide it. They thought I was a bit of a freak, actually.”

Hermione patted his arm. “That must not have been easy.”

“It wasn’t,” Luke said. “But it made me who I am today so---“

She could tell he didn’t like talking about this, but she couldn’t imagine why. Unless it was something to horrible---child abuse, perhaps? Her heart went out to him. She’d seen firsthand how that kind of childhood had affected Harry. Every time she thought about those horrid Dursleys…

“I promised you lunch,” Luke said interrupting her thoughts. “I know it’s a bit late, but

“Oh, it’s okay,” Hermione said hastily. “I don’t want you to go to all that trouble...“

Luke grabbed her arm. “It’s no trouble at all, Hermione. Trust me. And the only thing you need to tell me is strawberry or grape?”

“I beg your pardon?””

Luke gave her his most winsome smile. “You are about to sample my world-famous peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches. We have two kinds of jelly---strawberry and grape.”

“Oh,” Hermione said with a grin. “I didn’t realize that your sandwiches were world-famous.”

“Just you wait until you try them,” Luke said with a wink of his eye. Hermione followed him into the kitchen feeling something stirring inside her.

No. I’m not going to go there. This bloke is a patient. Former patient, but still it would not be professional. Besides, the last thing I want to do is open this can of worms.

“Have a seat,” Luke said motioning toward a chair in the corner. “You can keep me company while I make them---but you have to promise that you will not sell my secret to the public.”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Good,” Luke said pulling a loaf of bread from the shelves. Hermione watched as he prepared the sandwiches. He was quite handsome, she thought. In the past few years, she’d been attracted to men, but she’d never pursued anything because she didn’t think she deserved it. And she had her career to keep her busy. There really wasn’t any room for anything else. But, there was something about this man that intrigued her.

“You know you have a nice smile,” Luke said interrupting her thoughts.

“What?”

“You have a nice smile,” Luke repeated, setting a plate down in front of her. “You should do it more often.”

Hermione shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “I smile,” she said defensively.

“Not enough,” Luke told her, taking the seat opposite.

She didn’t have anything to say to that so she just looked down at the plate before her.

“How about you take a bite and let me know what you think?” Luke asked her.

Eager for the distraction, Hermione did as he asked.

“Well?”

Hermione had her mouth full so she just gave him the thumbs up sign.

“Told you,” he said smugly.

They ate in silence and Hermione could tell Luke was thinking of the best way to ask her something. He had an uncanny way of getting inside her head and she didn’t understand why. She decided to cut him off at the pass and ask him a question before he could get to her.

“So, where did you go to school?”

“Rivercroft,” he replied. “Small wizarding school near Tacoma.”

“That’s where you grew up?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

Even though he didn’t want to elaborate further, Hermione wasn’t deterred.

“Any brothers or sisters?”

“No,” Luke replied. “Only child.”

“Me, too.”

“Ever been married?”

Luke shook his head.

“Did you ever come close?’

He laughed. “You ask a lot of questions.”

Hermione grinned. “Answer the question.”

He leaned back in his seat and studied her for a moment before answering. “If you’re asking if I’ve ever dated anyone serious, the answer is no, not really. There was one girl when I was in school, but it didn’t last too long. It was more infatuation than anything else.”

“Did you ever make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for her?” Hermione asked.

Am I flirting with him?

“No,” Luke replied. “I only make these for the special ones.”

This time, it was Hermione who blushed. She pushed her plate away suddenly feeling like she just wanted to run away.

“Hermione?”

“I-I just remembered that I have something to do,” Hermione said standing up.

“But you just got here---“

“I’m sorry,” she apologized. “There’s a patient….I need to see if his test results are in. I’m sorry, Mr. Reilly.”

Luke stood up and reached for her hand. “Hermione.”

“I have to go,” she said trying as hard as she could not to cry in front of him. He probably thought she was crazy. This had been a mistake.

“Hermione---“

She hurried out of the kitchen, half expecting to hear footsteps behind her. But, he didn’t follow her. She had a little trouble remembering how to get out of the building, but after a few false turns, she found herself out on the street and heading for her car. This had been a mistake---a mistake that she wasn’t going to make again.

****

Harry watched from the window as she got into her car. They’d been having a good time. Why did she leave so suddenly? Had he said something wrong? Had he pushed her too far?

Perhaps Sean had been right. This was a mistake. But, he had a feeling that part of the reason she’d fled was because of her guilt. Guilt that she shouldn’t have to bear.

He couldn’t make up for the time she’d lost, but he was going to do everything in his power to make things right again.

He just hoped that she’d let him.

5. Away From the Sun

Author’s note: I am so sorry for the long wait between updates. I have a full-time job and am working with Heaven on three stories now and that takes up a great deal of my time. I really appreciate your patience between updates and hope that you enjoy this latest chapter.

'Cause now again I've found myself
So far down, away from the sun
That shines into the darkest place
I'm so far down, away from the sun
That shines to light the way for me
To find my way back into the arms
That care about the ones like me
I'm so far down, away from the sun again

(3 Doors Down, Away From the Sun)

It had been a week since Hermione had ran out of the community center. She couldn’t pinpoint exactly why she had reacted the way she had. Over the past seven days, she’d tried to come up with a million different excuses for why she’d ran out of there like the place was on fire. But, none of those excuses rang true.

If she was being honest with herself, she was attracted to Luke. It wasn’t something she liked admitting. But, there it was. She was attracted to him. But, she certainly wasn’t going to act on it. Letting someone get close would only set her up for heartbreak and she’d already seen far too much of that in her young life.

Thankfully, she had her work to keep her preoccupied. She managed to do quite a bit of research on her journal article. All that remained now was to write. But, every time that she sat down to write it, she thought about Luke. Given the way she’d reacted, she wouldn’t be surprised if she never saw him again. Which was a good thing, Hermione kept telling herself.

In the last couple of days, the hospital was hit with a flu outbreak and Hermione had lost count of the number of patients she’d seen. In the past two days, she might have gotten about an hour of sleep.

The chief resident had finally made her go home; admonishing her and telling her that she was of no use to anyone walking about looking like a zombie. She’d protested, but it had fallen on deaf ears.

Truth be told, it would be nice to just have an evening to herself. Maybe, she’d get to work on her article after she took a nice long bath and slept for awhile. She let herself into her townhouse and Crookshanks pounced on her. Hermione picked him up and hugged him to her. She hadn’t been around much for her poor cat and it was yet another thing that made her feel guilty. The cat purred contentedly in her arms and Hermione felt a genuine smile play at her lips.

She’d charmed the pet dish to refill once it was empty so she hadn’t left him to fend for himself. Still, she couldn’t help but feel bad about neglecting her cat.

“It’s just you and me tonight,” Hermione said, setting the cat back down. Of course, it was always just the two of them.

Hermione poured herself a glass of wine and then set off for the bathroom. A nice long bath was just what the doctor ordered and she was ready for the relaxation. She’d just filled the bathtub when she heard the intercom buzzing from the other room.

She sighed and turned off the water. The bath would have to wait until she got rid of whoever was calling on her.

Hermione strode quickly over to the front door and pressed the speaker button. “Yes?”

“…you have to hit the button, Ronald….”

“I am hitting the button….”

“You have to talk into it….”

“Luna, I think I know how to do this…”

“…obviously you don’t because you’re not speaking into it, are you?”

Hermione couldn’t believe this. Ron and Luna were here? Why?

“HERMIONE!”

Hermione jumped back from the speaker as Ron screamed her name.

“Ron, you don’t have to scream!” Hermione chided him. “You nearly busted my eardrum. And I’m fairly certain they heard you in New York.”

“CAN WE COME UP?” Ron screamed back into the intercom.

Hermione rolled her eyes. “Yes.” She pressed the button to open the front door downstairs and looked down at Crookshanks who was staring up at her.

“I so needed this right now,” she said wondering what on earth they were doing here. A few minutes later, she heard a knock on her door. Hermione picked up Crookshanks and then opened the door.

Ron and Luna stood close together with Luna holding their almost two-year old daughter, Sage, in her arms. The little girl’s blonde hair was peeking out from behind her red hat.

Crookshanks hissed at Ron.

“I see someone missed me,” Ron said to the cat. “Hello, you devil.”

“What are you doing here, Ron?” Hermione asked.

Ron shared a look with Luna before answering. “Nice to see you too, Hermione Jane. Look, Sage…that crazy, old, haggard woman is your godmother. She doesn’t normally look this bad…”

Hermione glared at him. “Let’s see how hot you look coming off a double shift, Ronald.”

Ron shrugged. “I’m always handsome and fetching.”

Luna smiled sideways at her husband. “Ronald…”

“What are you doing here?” Hermione repeated.

“Well, right now,” Ron replied. “We’re waiting for you to invite us in like the gracious host I’m sure you want to be…”

Hermione remembered that smart ass tone of Ron’s. It always had a 50-50 chance of either amusing her or pissing her off. Right now, it was the latter.

Reluctantly, she stood back and motioned for them to come inside.

“Da!’ Sage exclaimed holding out her arms for Ron. Luna handed off the little girl to her father who threw her arms around his neck and closed her eyes contentedly. Hermione couldn’t help smiling at this image. It was quite surreal to see her best friend---someone who was known for goofing off and shirking responsibility---as a father. This just seemed to show her how much she had truly missed out on over the years.

“This is a really nice place, Hermione,” Luna said taking off her coat. She hung it up on the coat rack and stepped further into the apartment.

“Even with the beast,” Ron said referring to Crookshanks. “That cat is possessed, Hermione. When you’re not here, he’s plotting to take over the world.”

Crookshanks promptly hissed at Ron. “See?” Ron asked. “You know it is nice to know that some things haven’t changed.”

Hermione sighed. “Did you come all this way to insult my cat?”

Ron shook his head. “No, I came all this way to insult you. You know that these past few years something’s been missing and I can’t believe I’m actually saying this, but I’ve missed you calling me an idiot. I’ve missed you telling me I have the emotional depth of a teaspoon.”

Luna giggled. “He has, Hermione. Every once in awhile he’ll ask me to roll my eyes and say ‘Honestly, Ronald’. It’s just not the same.”

Despite herself, Hermione smiled. “I might have missed that, too.”

Ron looked expectantly at her. “Do you have anything to eat?”

Hermione looked sheepishly at him. “I haven’t really had that much of an opportunity to get to the market.”

“We can do that for you,” Ron offered. “I’m dying to try out some good, old-fashioned American junk food.”

”Is that the real reason why you came?” Hermione asked.

Ron nodded. “Well, one of them. You know me and my stomach…”

“I’ll just see what I can rustle up for you in the kitchen,” Hermione started to say, but Luna beat her to the punch.

“Let me,” Luna offered, handing Sage off to Ron.

“But you don’t know where anything is,” Hermione protested.

“I’ll find my way,” Luna said patting Hermione on the shoulder. “You and Ron should catch up.”

Hermione just wanted to go get in the bath and be alone. Why did the two of them have to show up with Sage now? She silently sat down on the couch beside Ron, wondering what lecture he was going to throw at her now.

“So,” Ron began, as his daughter curled up against him, closing her eyes.

“So,” Hermione echoed.

“How’ve you been?”

Hermione picked up one of her throw pillows and placed it in her lap. “Busy. Very, very busy.”

Ron stared back at her, studying her face as if he was trying to catch her in a lie. It made her feel very uncomfortable.

“Mum and Dad send their best,” Ron continued. “And I told her that you’d be back for Christmas.”

Hermione glared at him. “Why would you do that?”

“Biggest holiday of the year,” Ron replied simply. “Since you’ve missed the past couple, I’d thought you’d make up for it with this one. And don’t even give me that work rubbish because I know very well you could get off if you wanted. Work’s important, but family and friends----that’s what really matters.”

Hermione looked away from him.

“You’ve cut yourself off from everyone that cares about you,” Ron continued. “But you should know by now, you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

Tears welled up in Hermione’s eyes.

“You weren’t the only one who lost their best friend,” Ron said quietly. “He was like a brother to me and not a day goes by that I don’t think about him.”

Hermione stared wordlessly down at her lap. She didn’t want to talk about this. Not now. Not ever. It was way too painful.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Ron told her. “Hermione, he chose to leave us that night. He knew that he was the one who ultimately had to face You-Know-Who by himself. He—he thought he was protecting us. That’s just the way he was. You remember that he didn’t even want us to go with him after sixth year…”

Hermione shook her head. “We could have helped him, Ron. We were helping him. I left him alone that last night. I knew something was up, but I just left him. Don’t you see? If I’d stayed with him that night, he’d still be---“

Ron squeezed her hand. “You can’t know that, Hermione. And you can’t spend the rest of your life playing what if this and what if that. It’s not going to change anything and it’s not going to bring him back.”

Hermione didn’t have anything to say to that. Logically, she knew Ron was right, but she didn’t want to be logical. She couldn’t help feeling guilty for her part in what had happened. She should have stayed with him and made sure he was okay. That was what she did, after all. That’s what she’d done since they were 11 years old. He’d told her more than once that she was his voice of reason. But, when he’d really needed her, where was she?

Luna came back into the kitchen. “I’ve made some tea and there was a tin of biscuits.”

“Thanks,” Hermione said quietly.

Luna could sense the tension and she shared a look with her husband. “Hermione, you look like you need a nice, long bath and a good night’s sleep.”

Hermione couldn’t argue with that. “I was about to do just that when you arrived.”

“I’ll set your tea by your bed,” Luna offered. “You go and have a nice bath. We’ll get settled in and Ron will go to the shops.”

Hermione was too knackered to argue. “H-how long are you planning on staying?”

“Just a couple of days,” Ron said. “I have some time off from the team. If you don’t mind that is. We’d really like to stay.”

Hermione did mind, but she knew Ron and Luna would not be deterred. Everyone went on and on about her stubbornness, but she couldn’t hold a candle to Ronald Weasley when he really wanted something. She was going to have house guests whether she liked it or not.

“Sure,” Hermione finally relented. “Um, there are fresh towels and linens in the closet by the bathroom. The guest room is the second door on the left.”

Luna smiled. “Thank you, Hermione.”

“You won’t even know we’re here,” Ron said brightly.

Hermione wasn’t so sure about that. She knelt down in front of her goddaughter who was nearly asleep.

“Hermy,” Sage said, rubbing at her eyes.

“Hello, Sage,” Hermione said giving the little girl a peck on the cheek. She really was an adorable little girl. Sage patted Hermione’s arm and gave her a smile.

“She likes you,” Ron said to Hermione.

“I like her too,” Hermione said softly.

“Say good night to Hermy,” Ron told Sage.

“Good, good,” Sage said closing her eyes again and resting her head on Ron’s chest.

Hermione smiled to herself. Perhaps, it wouldn’t be so bad having them around for a couple of days. It would be nice to catch up with her oldest friends and get to know her little goddaughter. She just had to make sure she kept the conversation away from Harry---the elephant in the room that she didn’t want to acknowledge.

”Good night,” Hermione said walking out of the room.

Luna and Ron were silent for a few moments. Ron finally stood up carrying his little girl into the guest bedroom. Luna followed and a few minutes later, they’d set up their daughter’s crib.

“Let’s get you into your pj’s, little one,” Ron said setting his daughter down on the bed. Sage was half asleep as Ron dressed her in a pair of yellow pajamas. He kissed her on the forehead before setting her down in the crib. He knew he hadn’t done much right with his life, but somehow he’d managed to fall in love with Luna and together they had this sweet little girl. It made everything seem right. Sage and Luna were everything in the world to him.

He wanted Hermione to find that same happiness. As if she could read his mind Luna asked him if he’d had a chance to talk to Hermione.

“A little,” Ron replied. “Maybe tomorrow…”

“We’ll get through to her,” Luna said sitting down beside him on the bed.

Ron shook his head. “I don’t know. She’s always been stubborn, Luna. Now, she’s turned into this complete workaholic. It was like---“

“Like how she was before you and Harry befriended her?” Luna guessed.

Ron nodded. “Exactly like that. Now, since he’s….gone…she’s gone right back to how she was before. He wouldn’t want her to live this way, you know?”

“We’ll get through to her, Ronald.”

Ron gave her a kiss. “You really think so?”

Luna smiled and cupped his face in her hands. “I know so.”

Ron wished he could share her optimism. Hermione was stubborn and once she set her mind out to do something, she dug her heels in and wouldn’t budge. He and Harry had kind of gotten her out of that when they were at Hogwarts. The two of them would try and get her out of the library every now and then to have a bit of fun. She would in turn remind them to do their homework and begrudgingly let them copy her notes every now and then.

Those days seemed so far away now. In many ways they were. Harry had been the glue that held their friendship together. Ron knew that had it not been for Harry, he and Hermione never would have been friends. They were too different---like oil and vinegar. Ron was glad that their relationship, as it were, didn’t have much time to blossom given how different they’d been. They’d have probably ended up killing each other or at least causing severe damage. They were better off as friends, and always had been. But, could they have that friendship back? Was it possible when the very reason for it was now gone?

********

Harry pressed the button on the intercom, waiting expectantly for Hermione’s voice to greet him. He’d stopped by the hospital, but they’d said she had the next couple of days off. He was taken aback because from what he knew of her now, she didn’t take days off. He hoped that everything was okay and that she’d just realized that she was working herself too hard and needed a break.

He pressed the button once more and there was still no response. Perhaps she had gone on a proper holiday?

Harry sighed. Well, that was that. He’d just try back in a couple of days and see how she was doing.

“Luke?”

He turned to see her walking up the sidewalk with…

It couldn’t be. Ron. Luna.

The three of them were getting closer and closer and he felt as if he couldn’t speak or move even if he tried. It was almost the same jolt to his system he’d had when he’d first seen Hermione after all these years. All these months of imagining what her life was like and what she’d been doing and if she’d started a family or started the career she’d always wanted. Now, those same questions came into his mind. Of course, he knew what the papers had said about Ron, but it certainly wasn’t the same as seeing his best friend alive and in person.

“Luke?” Hermione asked again when she reached him. “What---what on earth are you doing here?”

Ron and Luna exchanged a look, wondering who this stranger was and why he didn’t seen to be able to speak.

“Ron,” Harry finally managed to say.

Ron smiled warily at him. “Yeah, that’s me. I don’t believe we’ve met though. “

“We—we haven’t,” Harry stammered. “I’ve just heard a lot about you.”

Ron puffed his chest out. “Yes, well, I am the best athlete to ever get on a broom and yes I am more handsome in person than the pictures show.”

“And he has an ego the size of a football field,” Hermione said rolling her eyes. “Ron, Luna…this is Luke Reilly. He’s a patient.”

“Former patient,” Harry corrected, suddenly remembering the part he had to play. He hadn’t counted on seeing Ron and Luna, but perhaps they could help him with Hermione. As long as he didn’t give himself away, this could work.

“Former patient,” Hermione said smiling shyly at him.

“Nice to meet you, Luke,” Luna said extending her hand.

Harry shook it and smiled at her. She hadn’t changed much and he could tell just how happy she was just by looking at her.

“And this little angel is our daughter, Sage,” Ron said lifting the little girl out of her pram.

Harry smiled at the little girl. She was as pretty as Luna, but she had her father’s mischievous eyes.

“Um, why don’t you two go ahead upstairs with Sage?” Hermione asked. “I’ll be up in a minute.”

“Are you sure?” Ron asked casting a look in the stranger’s direction.

Hermione nodded. “I’ll be fine, Dad.”

Luna and Ron took their daughter inside, leaving Harry and Hermione alone. For awhile, neither of them spoke.

“I’m sorry for running off like I did---“ Hermione began at the same time that Harry said, “I’m sorry for showing up like this---“

Hermione blushed. “Sorry---you go ahead.”

He shook his head. “No, you go first.”

Hermione ran a hand through her hair. “Um, well, I guess I just got a little freaked out the other day. It was nothing you did. It was me. I’m really not that great in situations like that. See, the thing is that I usually keep to myself.”

He wanted badly to tell her that she didn’t need to do that. There were people around her that cared about her and wanted to see her happy. But, he wasn’t about to make things worse.

“It’s okay,” he said instead. “I was just worried that I might have done something wrong…”

Hermione shook her head. “No, it wasn’t you. It’s me.” He looked at her wanting badly to tell her that she had no reason to feel guilty about his “death”. But, he didn’t dare utter those words. She’d never understand. The truth was he wasn’t so sure he understood.

“What brings you by, Luke?”

“I’ve been thinking about you,” Harry replied.

“Me?”

“Yes, you,” Harry said with a grin. “And I was wondering if perhaps you’d be free to go out to dinner some evening?”

“Dinner?” Hermione asked. He could already see her wracking her brain for some excuse.

“Yes,” Harry said. “The meal that comes after lunch. I’m quite fond of it myself.”

“I—I don’t know,” Hermione stammered. “My---my friends are here and I wouldn’t be a very good host if---“

“I’m sure they could spare you for a night,” Harry interjected. He grinned at her. “Come on. If dinner’s not good for you, we could try another lunch. Or breakfast. Or even a late-afternoon snack.”

Despite herself, Hermione found herself smiling back at him. “Okay, dinner would be fine.”

“Fantastic,” Harry said resisting the urge to pump his fist in triumph. “Shall we say, seven tomorrow night?”

Hermione nodded. “Seven would be nice.”

“I’ll pick you up here,” Harry said giving her hand a squeeze.

“Okay,” Hermione said blushing. “Um, well, I’d better get inside.”

Harry reluctantly let go of her hand. “I promise not to feed you peanut butter and jelly sandwiches---“

Hermione smiled at him before heading inside.

Once he was sure he was alone, Harry did pump his fist in triumph. But then it slowly dawned on him what he was doing. He was---he was going out on a date with his best friend.

What the hell have I done?

6. Other Side of the World

Author’s note: Okay, okay. I know I said it wouldn’t be that long between updates, but real life and my co-authoring other stories has taken up a great deal of my time. My goal was to have this chapter out before the new book came out. I actually accomplished that goal! Yay, me! I hope you enjoy the latest chapter and I do apologize for the long wait!

And you will notice in the first part of this chapter---I go back and forth referring to Harry and Luke---that’s because there’s changes in points of view during that part of the chapter. So don’t flame me with “you called him Luke!” lol

Over the sea and far away
She's waiting like an iceberg
Waiting to change
But she's cold inside
She wants to be like the water

All the muscles tighten in her face
Buries her soul in one embrace
They're one and the same
Just like water

The fire fades away
Most of everyday
Is full of tired excuses
But it's to hard to say
I wish it were simple
But we give up easily
You're close enough to see that
You're the other side of the world to me

On comes the panic light
Holding on with fingers and feelings alike
But the time has come
To move along

(KT Tunstall, Other Side of the World)

The community center bustled with activity in the afternoons, but in the mornings it was almost always quiet. Harry used this time to get ready for that day’s activities and to catch up on paperwork (his least favorite part of the job).

This particular morning, he’d spent most of his time going over his speech. He was supposed to talk to the city council and the mayor about applying for extra funding for some projects the community center was looking to undertake. Though his main concern was the center’s sports programs, he was also in charge of youth activities. He coordinated with volunteer tutors and he even helped pitch in with reading and even math lessons whenever needed. He’d been an average student at Hogwarts and the fact that he was now helping tutor other students would be a surprise to those who had known him before (the D.A. not withstanding).

The meeting had gone well and he’d successfully convinced the council to provide additional funding for the center. He’d also applied for some grants that would help bolster the art and music programs that some of the staff was interested in developing. He made it back to the center just before lunch and sat down at his desk, taking off his jacket and loosening his tie. He’d always hated dressing up for things like that, but he didn’t think they’d buy him as a leader with jeans and a t-shirt.

Luke Reilly could certainly turn on the charm when he wanted to. Luke Reilly was charming and confident and didn’t have that chip on his shoulder that Harry Potter wore like a battle scar. It had been very strange getting used to looking into a mirror and seeing another face staring back at you. It was even more bizarre not depending on magic as much as he had in the past. Since he worked with mostly Muggle children, he had to hide that aspect of his life the majority of the time.

But all of that paled in comparison to the fact that he was about to go on a date with his best friend. A best friend who for all intents and purposes thought he was dead and buried. A date with Hermione. Hermione Granger. To say this was surreal was putting it lightly.

But, it had to be more than just coincidence that they’d both ended up here in Seattle. Of all the places in the world, they’d somehow found themselves in the exact same city at the exact same time. He’d spent so long working up the courage to see her and like Sean had warned him, one look wouldn’t be enough. Sean had this annoying habit of always being right. He’d warned Harry that this would be a bad idea. Harry had reasoned that he just needed to see for himself that she was okay.

Well, he had seen her and he’d found out that she wasn’t okay. It wasn’t as if he could walk away when she needed him most, was it?

The more he got to know her again, though, the more difficult it would be to walk away. What a mess he found himself in and now Ron was in the picture.

Ron. He certainly hadn’t expected to see him the other day on the sidewalk outside Hermione’s home. Like everyone else, he’d read about Harry Potter’s loyal sidekick getting married to his school sweetheart and starting a family. For some reason, Harry hadn’t been surprised to find out that Luna was the one who had captured Ron’s heart. Even though he’d known that his best friend harbored feelings for Hermione, he’d never really pictured them making it for the long haul. They were far too different and fought more than anything else. Harry had never told Ron or Hermione about this. The idea of them as a couple made him uncomfortable. It wasn’t because he didn’t want his friends to be happy. He did more than anything. He just didn’t want to feel like some child of divorced parents who had to pick sides if they broke up. Things had been so much easier before hormones had come into the picture.

Now, that was a moot point. Ron and Hermione hadn’t gotten married. Ron had found love with Luna Lovegood and together they’d started a family. Ron was someone’s father. Ron---the very same bloke who had told anyone who would listen that he’d never get married because he didn’t want to get tied down. Hermione had joked to Harry that it wasn’t as if anyone would ever have Ron and that she pitied the poor girl who finally landed him.

Harry supposed that in his mind, he’d always pictured his two best friends as he’d last seen them. In his mind, they were still those brave 17-year olds who stood by his side no matter what. Logically, he’d known that they’d grow up and get older, but it was quite a shock to see it firsthand.

“How’d it go?”

Harry looked up from his paperwork to see Sean standing in the doorway.

“Hmmm?”

“How’d it go?” Sean asked again. “You okay? You looked a million miles away just then.”

Harry cleared his throat. “Yeah, it went fine. We were approved for $10,000 and I applied for some additional grants.”

Sean grinned. “Fantastic.”

“Yeah,” Harry said absently. “We---we um, should find out in the next month or so if we get those.”

Sean sat down opposite him. “That sounds great. So, are you coming tonight?”

Harry shook his head.

Sean looked quizzically at his friend. “Come on. You always come. It’s not like you have something else planned, right?”

Harry was silent. Sean had a poker game every week at his apartment and Harry had been to every single one. But, he was going to have to miss tonight’s game. He just didn’t want to tell Sean why. He didn’t need a lecture right now.

“Let me guess,” Sean said. “Hermione Granger has something to do with this, right?”

Harry pushed back in his chair and stood up. “I have to go down to the gym. Thanks for stopping by. I’ll be at the next one…”

Sean shook his head. “You, my friend, are a glutton for punishment.”

Harry ignored him and walked past his friend into the hall. But, Sean wasn’t finished with him.

“You’re playing with fire,” Sean told him. “I told you this was a bad idea. One meeting turned into two and look at you now---“

“It’s just dinner,” Harry said walking down the hall.

“I seem to remember you telling me before you asked me to knock you off the broom that it would be just one meeting,” Sean recalled. “And I went along with that, but come on. This is getting out of hand. She’s going to figure this out.”

“I’m going to be careful,” Harry said sheepishly. “She’s not going to know.”

“This is going to blow up in your face,” Sean said quietly. “You know that I’m right.”

Harry stopped in his tracks, but didn’t turn around.

“I just hope you know what you’re doing,” Sean said.

Harry hoped that exact same thing.

*********

The brunette stared at her reflection in the mirror. The time off had brought the color back to her cheeks and the dark circles under her eyes had disappeared. Having Ron, Luna and Sage around had also helped, loathsome as she was to admit it.

She’d missed them and it had been nice having her friends to talk to and to get to know again. For the first time in a long time, she didn’t feel quite so lonely. No matter how much distance she’d put between them, she had missed her friends. Thankfully, she’d managed to avoid any talk of Harry. It was better that way; for all of them.

It wasn’t like Ron and Luna hadn’t tried to talk about him. They had, but every time the conversation steered in that direction, Hermione would change the subject.

Right now, though, she was wasting time. She should be getting ready for her…date.

Hermione couldn’t believe she was actually going on a date. The last date she’d ever been on had been years ago when she’d accepted Viktor Krum’s invitation to the Yule Ball.

She walked over to her closet and felt a surge of disappointment. She didn’t really have anything that would be suitable for a date. Of course, it would help if she knew where they were going. But, she hadn’t wanted to call Luke. She was afraid that she’d get in even deeper than she already was. For the first time in a long time, she was actually attracted to someone.

“Need some help?” a voice asked from behind her.

Hermione turned and offered Luna a half smile.

“I think I’m beyond help at this point,” Hermione admitted.

“Nonsense,” Luna said with a wave of her hand. “You need some help getting ready for your date and that’s one of the reasons why I’m here.”

“Well, it’s not really a date per se,” Hermione said defensively.

Luna looked at her friend. “It’s not? Well, what else would you call going out to dinner with a man whom you clearly fancy?”

Hermione blushed. “I don’t---“

Luna patted her on the shoulder. “It’s okay. It’ll be our little secret.”

Hermione turned away and didn’t say anything.

Luna walked over to the closet and perused through the sensible shirts and trousers and skirts Hermione had for work. Luna wasn’t fashion conscious to say the least. She usually favored comfort over style. Hermione was very much the same way. Luna knew there was something in this closet that would work for a date; something that would make Hermione comfortable and alluring all at the same time.

Luna found a black dress in the back of the closet. It was perfect for a night out and Luna knew it would look great on Hermione. She held it out for her friend. “This would be great.”

Hermione studied the dress. “That might be a bit much, Luna. I bought that for a hospital function. I only wore it once.”

“Which means Luke hasn’t seen you in it,” Luna said. “And it’s perfect for tonight.”

Hermione took the dress and held it against her. It was a black, layered chiffon dress with spaghetti straps and Hermione had found it on a lark last year. She’d needed something for a charity event the hospital was having and she’d grabbed the first thing she’d put her hands on. Luna did have a point. It was probably the closest thing Hermione had to a “date” dress.

“You and Ron aren’t going to be here that long,” Hermione said hanging the dress back up in her closet. “I can go out with Luke another time. We---we could order a pizza and maybe watch a movie.”

“We did that last night,” Luna reminded her, pushing past her friend and getting the dress back out of the closet. “And Ron and I are big kids. You can leave us alone here and we promise that your flat will be in one piece when you return.”

“I’m not worried about that,” Hermione said.

“You are trying to reason yourself out of a date with a nice bloke who clearly fancies you,” Luna said handing her the dress. “You don’t need to do that. There’s nothing to overanalyze here. You can’t find a way out of this in some book. And if you’re being honest with yourself, you want to go.”

Hermione opened her mouth to protest, but nothing came out. Luna was right. She did want to go. But, she was scared to death. This was easy for Luna. She didn’t have to worry about dates anymore. She was married and had a family of her own.

Hermione sighed and resigned herself to getting ready for her “date”. Luke probably wasn’t that apprehensive or nervous about this. He always seemed so sure of himself and confident. He reminded her of---

She wasn’t going to do that. She wasn’t going to compare every bloke in the world to her best friend.

“Get ready,” Luna said firmly. “I’ll be right out here if you need anything.”

“Yes, Mum,” Hermione said shaking her head as she went into her bathroom.

**********

Nearly an hour later, Harry stood outside Hermione’s building pacing in front of the steps, trying to muster the courage to do this. She probably wasn’t nervous at all. She was probably upstairs trying to think of excuses as to why they shouldn’t go out. He hoped that wasn’t the case, but given what he knew of Hermione now, he wasn’t too sure.

He took a deep breath and pushed the call button for her apartment.

A few moments later, a male voice yelled back at him. “WHAT?”

“Hermione?”

“NO! IT’S NOT HERMIONE! THIS IS RON! WHO IS THIS?”

Harry stifled a laugh. Obviously Ron still didn’t know his way around Muggle contraptions. He could still remember that phone call he’d shared with his best friend when he lived at the Dursleys.

“Luke,” Harry said pressing the talk button. “I’m here to pick up Hermione.”

“WHAT?”

“Ronald, why on earth are you shouting?” Luna’s voice could be heard in the background. “Honestly, just press that red button to let him in.”

“HANG ON, MATE!” Ron shouted back. A few moments later the buzzer sounded and Harry stepped inside the building.

Harry leaned back against the lift wall and kept telling himself over and over again that he would be able to do this. He’d get through it without letting on who he really was or why he’d done what he had. Now, he had to get through Ron and Luna too.

Summoning every ounce of courage he had, he knocked on the door.

Luna answered the door with Sage in her arms. “Hello, again.”

Harry smiled back at her. “Hello, Mrs. Weasley.”

“You can call me Luna,” she told him ushering him inside. “Hermione will be out in a few moments.”

Harry nodded and followed her into the sitting room where Ron was munching on some crisps. When he saw “Luke” he pulled a stern face. Harry was hit with a wave of nostalgia for the best friend who was sitting before him. How much had he and Ron gone through? He’d been more like a brother. There was so much he wanted to tell him and so many questions he wanted to ask.

“I have to change Sage,” Luna said. “But please make yourself at home.” She made a move for the guest room, but shot her husband a warning look.

Ron though ignored his wife and gruffly said to Luke. “Sit down.”

Harry raised an eyebrow, but did as Ron asked. He hoped that Hermione would be out soon.

In her bedroom, Hermione surveyed herself in the mirror. To her surprise, she felt butterflies in her stomach. Luna was right. She did like Luke. He was so easy to talk to and he made her laugh, something she hadn’t done too much of in the last few months. This was a good thing, she told herself. Even though she was scared to death, she knew she had to get back out there and start living again.

Hermione took a deep breath and collected her thoughts. She wanted to do this. She really did.

As she reached for her bag, she caught sight of a framed photograph of her with Harry and Ron. It had been taken the day of Fleur and Bill’s wedding. Hermione smiled as she remembered how they’d managed to tear Ron away from the refreshment table long enough to get the picture. It had been the last photograph taken of the three of them.

“This is okay, isn’t it, Harry?” Hermione asked. The Harry in the photograph didn’t answer her; he just waved at her and made a goofy face at her.

“Hermione?”

She looked up and saw Luna standing in the doorway.

“Luke’s here,” Luna said. “And you look gorgeous.”

Hermione smiled. “Really? Thanks.”

“And you’d better get out here before Ron moves on to phase two of his interrogation,” Luna told her. “I heard him say something about a shovel a few moments ago and how no one would miss him…”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “I’d better go and rescue Luke then.”

In the sitting room, Ron stared quizzically at Luke. “I don’t think I stuttered. I asked you what your intentions were toward Hermione.”

“My intentions?”

“Do you have a hearing problem?” Ron asked folding his arms. “Your intentions, mate. Do you fancy her? Or are you looking for a quick---“

“RON!”

Ron and Harry both turned to see Luna and Hermione.

“Ron, I have a father already,” Hermione chastised. “I really don’t need you scaring poor Luke to death. This is just two friends going out for dinner. Nothing more.”

Harry got to his feet, but he felt absolutely speechless. He’d seen Hermione dressed up before, but she’d been fourteen then. That night of the Yule Ball when she’d taken everyone by surprise in her periwinkle blue dress robes. But, she had grown into a lovely, amazing woman somehow and Harry couldn’t tear his eyes away. She was…beautiful.

Hermione seemed to feel his eyes on her and she turned to meet his gaze. She smiled shyly at him.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized. “Ron is a little overprotective.”

“It’s---it’s okay,” Harry stammered. “You look---wow.”

Hermione blushed. “Thank you. You look very nice, too.”

Ron stood up and looked back and forth at them. “So, what time should I expect you home, Hermione?”

”When I get back,” Hermione replied curtly.

Ron glared at her. “Young lady…”

“I’ll have her home at a reasonable time,” Harry promised.

Luna waved her hand dismissively. “You two have a great time. I’ll take care of this one, here.”

Hermione grabbed her coat from the closet. To her surprise, Luke helped her with it. She shivered when his hand touched her bare arm.

”Are my hands cold?” He asked. “I’m sorry---“

”No,” Hermione reassured him. “I just—I just got a chill is all.” There was something familiar about his touch, something warm and reassuring.

Luke smiled at her. “So, you ready to go?”

Hermione nodded. “I’m ready.”

After saying goodbye to Ron and Luna, they walked out of the apartment and waited for the lift. Hermione stole a glance at Luke, who seemed to be doing the same. She met his eyes and laughed. “I’m sorry for back there. Ron goes a little overboard.”

Luke shrugged. “It’s okay. He cares about you. He doesn’t want to see you hurt.”

Hermione opened her mouth to tell him she could take care of herself when Luke spoke once more.

“And neither do I,” Luke said quietly.

******

Their reservations were for the Metropolitan Grill, one of the nicest restaurants in Seattle. On the drive to the restaurant, Hermione regaled him with stories about Ron, Luna, and Sage.

“She can’t say my name very well,” Hermione told him. “Which is understandable, right? So, she calls me Hermy, which I usually detest. But the way she says it is so adorable.”

Luke laughed. “Mental note to self. Never call you Hermy.”

Hermione smiled at him. “Well, unless you’re a toddler or a giant.”

“A giant?”

“Yeah,” Hermione said another smile playing at her lips as she remembered that day in the forest when Hagrid had introduced her and Harry to his half-brother, Grawp. “It’s a long story.”

Hermione expected him to ask her more, but he didn’t. She liked that about him. He didn’t push her for details about the war, her friendship with Harry and Ron or the things she’d done before she’d come to Seattle. Well, he asked sometimes, but he seemed to know when to push and when to back away. It was one of the things she liked most about him. In fact, it reminded her a lot of how her best friend was---or had been.

Oh, how she missed him! She’d have given anything to have had one more day with him to talk to him and tell him how much his friendship had meant to her. That day on the train all those years ago had changed her life in more ways than one. And even if she had known then what was going t happen, she wouldn’t have changed anything. She was better for having been his friend.

“Hermione?”

Hermione turned to face Luke. “Yes?”

“I asked if you liked the music.” Luke asked. “If you don’t, you’re more than welcome to change the disc.”

Hermione shook her head. “No, it’s fine. Really.”

“So you’ve enjoyed having your friends here for a visit?”

Hermione nodded. “Yeah, even if they did ambush me.”

Luke chuckled.

“But if I had known they were coming, I probably would have made up some excuse to put them off,” Hermione continued.

“Why’s that?”

Hermione shrugged. “I haven’t been home in ages, really. I’ve just been busy and London---London has too many memories.”

“But it’s where your friends and family are,” Luke argued. “You miss them, surely?”

“It’s complicated,” Hermione said.

“Life is short,” he said quietly, his eyes on the road. “You know you can take your friends and your family for granted, thinking that you’ll call or you’ll visit and that they’ll always be there, but that isn’t always the case. You’ve lost all this time---time that you thought you’d always have.”

Hermione studied him for a few moments. “Speaking from experience?”

He hesitated a moment before nodding.

“And who did you take for granted?”

“My family,” he replied.

She waited for him to elaborate, but he didn’t. Hermione realized that while he knew a lot about her, she didn’t know that much about him or his background. She hoped to change that by the end of the evening.

7. Little Lies

Author’s note: I am so sorry. It’s been nearly five months since the last update. I haven’t been very good about keeping up on this one, but I am going to try and change that. I hope you enjoy the new chapter! Please read and review!

If I could turn the page
In time then I'd rearrange just a day or two
Close my, close my, close my eyes
But I couldn't find a way
So I'll settle for one day to believe in you
Tell me, tell me, tell me lies
Tell me lies
Tell me sweet little lies

(Fleetwood Mac, Little Lies)

Hermione stole a glance at Luke over her menu. This was the first real date she’d been on in years. This was far and away a lot different from those times she’d been in the library at Hogwarts talking to Viktor Krum or the awkward flirting she and Ron shared in the common room.

Hermione had never in her life not known what to say, but tonight, she was wondering what she could and couldn’t say or do. She had no real experience with this and she imagined Luke would think she was an idiotic mute. Truth be told, she was trying to come up with a list of questions in her head so she could get to know him better.

“Do you know what you want?” he asked conversationally.

Hermione nodded. “Answers.”

“Answers?”

“Answers,” Hermione repeated.

“I didn’t realize that those were on the menu,” Luke returned with a grin.

Hermione smiled, but she wasn’t going to be deterred.

“So, you have questions for me, then?” He asked.

“Just a few,” Hermione replied. She could sense hesitancy on his part and she didn’t miss the look of relief that came over his face when their waiter came over to take their orders.

This was just a momentary distraction though, Hermione told herself. She was going to find out all she wanted to know about Luke. He was good at throwing the attention off of himself, but she wasn’t going to let him get away so easily. After tonight, she was going to know him as well as she knew the back of her hand.

Hermione ordered the salmon, while Luke chose a steak and they both decided to drink wine with their meal.

“So, have you enjoyed your time off?” Luke asked when they were alone again.

Hermione nodded. “It’s great having Luna and Ron around. I missed them.”

Luke opened his mouth to ask her another question, but Hermione wasn’t going to let him do that.

“Oh, no you don’t,” she said holding up her hand. “I told you I had questions for you.”

He studied her for a moment. “Did anyone ever tell you that you can be quite tenacious?”

Hermione grinned. “All the time. It’s one of my gifts.”

“I’ll make it easy for you,” Luke said. “I like the color brown. I know it sounds boring, but that’s me. I like sports and watching movies. I’ve always wanted to---“

“Well, that’s good to know, but I’m the one asking questions here, Luke,” Hermione interjected.

Luke held up both of his hands in surrender. “Okay, sorry. Fire away, Miss Granger.”

But now that she had the floor, so to speak, she was at a loss as to what to ask first. Luckily, the waiter chose that moment to come back to the table carrying their wine. Hermione was happy. Perhaps the wine would give her the courage to loosen up more. She took a slow sip of her wine before beginning.

Luke grinned at her. “Perhaps we can ask the waiter if he has a flashlight. You could shine it in my face while you interrogate me.”

“You think this is an interrogation?”

Luke grinned again. “It sure seems like it.”

”It’s not an interrogation. I promise. I’m just…curious.”

Luke leaned back in his chair. “Okay, okay…”

Hermione thought for a moment. “Where did you grow up?”

Luke shrugged. “We moved around a lot when I was a kid.”

”Well, what was your favorite?”

“I never really had a favorite,” Luke replied evasively.

“You said that you didn’t grow up with your parents?” Hermione asked, remembering their conversation at the community center a few weeks ago. “I mean, if you moved around a lot---“

“It’s complicated,” Luke replied before taking a drink from his glass. “My parents were good people and I know if they could have, they’d have been there for me.”

Hermione studied him for a few moments before she continued her line of questioning. She didn’t want to overstep her bounds where he was concerned, but she was a naturally curious person and she wanted to get to know him better. That was the point of tonight, wasn’t it? Getting to know each other better. She sensed sadness about him and though she really did want to know what had happened with his parents, she wasn’t going to push it.

“So, were you a good student?”

Luke gave her a lazy grin. “I did enough to get by.”

Hermione grinned back at him.

“What?” he asked. “We can’t all get top marks, can we?”

Hermione shook her head. “We all could if we all applied ourselves. All it takes is organization, determination and will. Really, that’s what’s helped me get where---what?”

He was looking at her in that way of his again.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he replied. “You just—you reminded me of someone just now. An old friend.”

Hermione was intrigued. “An old girlfriend?”

Luke shook his head. “No, she was never a girlfriend.”

“The plot thickens,” Hermione said rubbing her hands together. “Unrequited crush? You loved her from afar, but alas, it wasn’t meant to be…”

Luke rolled his eyes. “You have been reading too many romance novels, Dr. Granger.”

Hermione knew when she was right and a wide smile broke across her face. “So who was she?”

“I’ve never really had a serious girlfriend,” Luke replied. “Can we leave it at that?”

Hermione shook her head. “No. The other day at the center, you said that you’d dated someone when you were at school.”

Luke laughed. “If I had known I was in for the Grand Inquisition, I might have thought twice about asking you out. Do you subject all your dates to this treatment?”

Hermione set her glass aside and looked at him. “Well, there’s something we have in common, Luke. I never really had a serious boyfriend, either.”

Luke met her gaze. “What about you and Ron Weasley? I thought---“

Hermione shook her head. “We shared a few kisses, but it was never anything serious. We never even went out on a real date. Most of the time, he and I were worried about Harry more than anything.”

Luke shifted in his seat.

“So, other than a few snogs with Ron in the common room and a date with Viktor Krum,” Hermione said blushing. “I haven’t had a serious relationship, either.”

“I find that extremely hard to believe,” Luke said. “You’re intelligent, beautiful, charming, funny…”

“High-strung, tightly wound,” Hermione interjected.

“Maybe a little,” Luke teased.

Hermione reached across the table and swatted at his arm. “Very funny, Luke. But we’re not talking about me, here. We were talking about you.”

Luke looked helplessly around the room. Hermione laughed. She hadn’t had this much fun in quite some time. She’d been worried about nothing.

“So…”

“So?” Luke asked.

“You never had a serious girlfriend?”

“One,” Luke replied. “But, it didn’t work out. We never went out on an actual date, really. It was more of an infatuation on both of our parts. It was kind of the wrong time for us.”

“Where is she now?”

Luke leaned back in his chair. “Last I heard, she was happily dating a mutual friend.”

Hermione studied him. “You don’t seem too heartbroken.”

“I’m not,” Luke replied as their waiter came back with their food. He smiled at her and Hermione blushed. That was that same look he gave her. It seemed so familiar. He seemed so familiar.

Hermione took a bite of her salmon and surreptitiously studied Luke Reilly. It wasn’t the first time she’d noticed his good looks. But, that wasn’t what attracted her the most. What confused her was how she could feel so close to someone that she didn’t know very well; someone she’d only met a couple of weeks ago.

“How’s yours?”

Hermione broke out of her reverie and looked at him. “Hmm? Oh…it’s delicious. How’s yours?”

“Good,” Luke replied. “You know…it’s nice to eat something that hasn’t had the crusts cut off or something that came from a box or a can.”

Hermione laughed. “You don’t get a chance to eat many home-cooked meals then?”

“Not for lack of trying,” Luke told her. “I actually love to cook. I wish I had more time to do it.”

“Well, I can vouch for your peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches,” Hermione said dryly. “Best ones in the world.”

Luke chuckled. “Laugh now, but if you play your cards right, Dr. Granger, I just might cook for you sometime.”

Hermione blushed. He wanted to see her again. Or at least that’s what it sounded like. To her surprise, the idea didn’t terrify her. She wanted to see him again, too.

The rest of their meal went by without incident. Hermione asked some more questions, but he kept his answers vague. The only time he really went into detail was when she asked him about his friend Sean. Apparently Luke had met him when he arrived in Seattle. They’d become good friends and Luke spent most of his free time with Sean and Sean’s girlfriend, Kate. Hermione laughed at some of the stories Luke told her about them and she felt like she knew them already even though she’d only met Sean once in passing.

“He’s been a really good friend,” Luke was telling her as they exited the restaurant. “He and Kate were there for me during a really tough time in my life. You know you hit rock bottom and you just don’t see yourself coming out of it? Well, they pulled me back up and got me involved with the community center and here I am.”

Hermione smiled. “Good friends can do that for you.” She certainly couldn’t imagine what her life would have been like had she not had Harry and Ron in it. They were the two most important people in her life next to her parents. Losing Harry though had been the most painful, traumatic experience of her life. There was a hole in her heart and she wasn’t sure it could ever be filled. She knew Ron felt the same way. They could continue their friendship, but it would never be the same. Something---someone---would always be missing.

Luke took her hand.

“Did you ever feel like a third wheel?”

Luke shrugged. “Not really. They never make me feel like an outsider. The only time I don’t like it is when the two of them gang up on me and try to set me up with a girl.”

“Oh,” Hermione grimaced. “Don’t you hate that? I have patients and colleagues coming up to me all the time telling me they know just the fellow for me.”

“And you’ve never taken them up on it?”

Hermione shook her head. “Merlin, no!”

Luke laughed. “Well, I must say that I got roped into a few blind dates courtesy of my two friends and let me tell you, I wondered what they must think of me after I saw who they were trying to set me up with.”

“Didn’t turn out well, I gather?”

Luke shook his head. “Not at all. But we shouldn’t talk about that. It would only depress me and bring back bad memories.”

“Okay,” Hermione said. “I promise not to bring it up. We wouldn’t want to dredge up any awful memories you might have suppressed.”

“Thank you,” Luke said opening the car door for her.

Hermione smiled warmly at him and again found herself lost in those eyes of his.

“We’d---we’d better go,” Luke said abruptly.

“Oh,” Hermione said taken aback. “Of course.”

Luke waited for her to sit down and then he closed the door. She smiled as she watched him go around the other side of the car. She was enjoying herself and that was the biggest surprise of all.

***

Back at the apartment, Luna and Ron had just put Sage down for the evening and were watching their little girl as she slept.

“Think we should get her an extra blanket?” Ron asked.

Luna shook her head. “No. I think she’s fine. Let’s go back in the sitting room so we don’t wake her up.”

Ron nodded and followed his wife out of the room and looked at the clock on the wall. It was just past nine.

“She should have been home by now, don’t you think?” Ron asked, sitting down on the sofa beside his wife.

Luna looked at him. “Ronald, it’s not even 10 in the evening.”

”Exactly,” Ron said. “She should have been home by now.”

Luna patted his arm. “You do realize that Hermione is a grown woman without a curfew?”

“Well, yes, but---“

“But nothing,” Luna interjected. “You’re acting like a concerned father and you have no reason to. Luke seems like a perfectly nice bloke and I’m sure he and Hermione are having a good time.”

Ron scrunched up his nose in disgust. “I don’t want to think about Hermione having a good time, thank you very much. And what do you mean ‘seems like a perfectly nice bloke’? That’s exactly what I’m talking about Luna---we don’t even know him. We have no idea how he is.”

“You worry too much,” Luna told him, resting her head on his shoulder. “This is good for Hermione. She needs to move on and this is just what she needs.”

“Something about it doesn’t seem right,” Ron grumbled.

“Don’t worry,” Luna said softly. “I like him. There’s just something about him.”

“Such as?”

“I don’t know,” Luna replied. “It’s just a hunch.”

“Your hunches are very rarely wrong,” Ron admitted.

Luna smiled. “No, they’re not. My hunches told me that you were a great guy and that I was lucky to have you.”

Ron kissed the top of her head. “Truth is, I’m lucky to have you. I didn’t always treat---“

Luna looked up and put her finger on his lips. “No more of that. That was in the past. You didn’t know me then.”

“I still should have been nicer.”

“You’ve more than made up for it now,” Luna said giving him a kiss. “You’ve made me happier than I could have ever imagined.”

“I love you,” Ron said holding her close. “And I want Hermione to have what we have.”

“She will,” Luna said softly. “But she’s not going to do it with you breathing down her neck and acting like an overprotective father.”

Ron smiled at his wife. “So, in other words, back off?”

Luna beamed at him. “Yes. And, I think I might know something that might take your mind off it…”

”You do, eh?”

Luna kissed him again and whispered something in his ear. The look on Ron’s face was priceless as he listened to what she had to say. Needless to say, he didn’t worry anymore about Hermione for the rest of the evening.

********

After their dinner, Harry took Hermione to a movie. He could barely concentrate on the film though. He was thinking about how great it was to be with his friend again; even if it was under false pretenses. Things had started off a little shaky. He’d certainly not expected the Spanish Inquisition.

But, it had been nice, seeing that gleam in her eye as she asked him question after question. Harry had to keep on his toes around her. He didn’t want to give anything away. If she knew the truth, she’d never ever speak to him again. The reasons he’d stayed away---she would never understand. He didn’t really understand, either. He was still trying to come to terms with it himself when he’d found out that she’d settled in Seattle, of all places. What someone trying to tell him something? Here she was right where he’d started over.

“Luke?”

He looked over at her. “Yeah?”

“You’ve been awfully quiet since we left the theater,” Hermione commented. “What’s on your mind?”

“I thought we were finished with the questions,” Harry replied with a grin. “I didn’t think you had any more left in you.”

Hermione laughed. “Well, that’s where you’re wrong. I am a very curious person and I always have questions. You wouldn’t learn anything if you never asked questions.”

“Okay then,” Harry replied. “I was thinking of what a nice evening this was.”

Hermione smiled back at him. “Even if I did interrogate you?”

”Even with that,” Harry replied turning the car onto her street.

“I promise not to be so hard on you the next time I see you,” Hermione said.

Harry parked the car in front of her building. “That’s very big of you, Miss Granger. So---you want to see me again, is that what you’re saying?”

Even though it was dark in the car, he could tell she was blushing.

“Um, well, you know,” Hermione stammered. “You run the center and you might get hurt again or one of the children. You might show up at the hospital….”

“You’re doing it again,” Harry replied turning to grin at her.

“Doing what?”

“Babbling,” he replied.

Hermione hit him on the arm. “I do not babble.”

“Yes you do,” Harry argued. “You do it when you’re nervous.”

”I do not babble,” Hermione said defensively. “And how would you know? You don’t even know me.”

“I do know you,” Harry replied. “And you babble.”

Hermione shook her head and laughed. “I don’t like babble.”

“Nervous chatter, then,” Harry suggested. “How’s that?”

Hermione hit him again on the arm.

“Ow!”

“That did not hurt you,” Hermione said.

“You have quite a little right hook there,” Harry said rubbing his arm in dramatic fashion.

“I think you’ll live,” Hermione said making a move to open her car door.

Harry didn’t know what possessed him to do it. But, he couldn’t resist. He grabbed her arm. “Wait.”

Hermione turned and looked at him. For the longest time, neither of them spoke. Harry stared into her chocolate brown eyes and felt himself melting. How had he not noticed how beautiful they were before?

He felt himself leaning in and to his surprise, Hermione didn’t pull away. He lightly brushed his lips against hers. When she didn’t protest, he deepened the kiss. Admittedly, he hadn’t kissed many girls in his time, but they all paled in comparison to this one. Hermione was----amazing.

“Luke,” Hermione whispered when they pulled apart.

That one name brought him out of the daze he’d been in. He couldn’t do this. This was wrong. She didn’t know who he really was. It wasn’t fair to do this to her.

“It’s late,” he said quietly.

“Yeah,” Hermione nodded. “I---I guess I’ll talk to you later?”

Harry nodded wordlessly. Hermione got out of the car and Harry watched her until she entered the building. He wanted so badly to run after her and explain to her what had happened.

Why was he doing this to himself? Why was he doing this to her?