Are We Really Just Pretending?

Luminous Star

Rating: PG13
Genres: Romance
Relationships: Lily & James
Book: Lily & James, Books 1 - 6
Published: 15/03/2007
Last Updated: 15/03/2007
Status: in_progress

A/U-- BUT ONLY SLIGHTLY! SO DON'T RUN OFF JUST YET! Lily thinks she’s got the entire world and everyone in it figured out while James is the son of a diplomat and while he has a rebellious streak, is quite afraid to go against his father’s wishes. From the moment they meet, when Lily transfers to Hogwarts during their 7th year, Lily and James are completely opposite but when an incident causes everyone including James’ father to believe they’re going out, will it bring the two closer together, or will they end up killing each other in the process? Everything will work out, James and Lily are convinced they’ve only got to keep up the charade for a couple of months , tops, but are they really just pretending? Or is it possible there could be something more?

Chapters

1. A Red Marble in a Sea of Black

1. A Red Marble in a Sea of Black

A/N: I know, I know! I should be working on getting the next chapter of “That Summer” out, and I am! But, well, inspiration came to me and I couldn’t just let it go to waste now, could I?

Chapter 1: A Red Marble in A Sea of Black

The carriage pulled up to the front gates and Lily Evans stepped out. She gave a hearty pull to the handle on her trunk and struggled only slightly before it too popped out of the carriage door. She propped it up right with ease, taking a swig from her water bottle as she stood beside her trunk and allowed her strikingly unusual green eyes to scan the castle that stood before her. The castle was absolutely beautiful, much more so than her last school had been, and if Lily were being completely honest, she would have to admit that Hogwarts itself, judging by the looks alone already felt better than the dozens of schools her mother had dragged her to throughout her educational career. But looks, Lily had learned long ago, didn’t matter because no matter how lovely the school looked, it really was exactly the same as all the other schools she had attended and been chucked out of. Or rather, as the countless letters sent from the administration had so eloquently put it according to her mother: politely asked her not to return for the following term. Through those doors, Lily knew the halls of Hogwarts would be filled with the exact same people-- no, children she had been forced to recognize as her peers in the past. Boring, unoriginal, followers, who would rather die than be the red marble in a sea of black ones-- way more obsessed with ‘fitting in’ than daring to be different or caring more about which member of the Weird Sisters was seen dining in muggle London with that bloke who’d won Witch Weekly’s ‘Most Charming Smile Award’ last month than the real issues that faced the world. They were all the same and no one could convince Lily other wise as she had yet, in all the schools she had attended, to find an individual who had piqued her interest enough to prove her wrong.

She blew a strand of her long auburn colored hair which had blown into her face out of the way and heard the distinct clank of her mother’s pumps as she descended the carriage.

“Well, now, this is quite lovely, don’t you think, darling? Although, I do wish you‘d have changed into the mandatory black robes you‘ll be wearing as part of your uniform, or at least chosen a more appropriate outfit. Are you sure you don‘t want to change before we go in?” her mother asked as she put an arm around her daughter.

“No, I don’t want to change-- I happen to like my outfit and it‘s not that great, mother.” Lily responded defiantly as she moved out of her mother’s grip so she could face her correctly. “I don’t see why you’re making me go here.”

“Lily, Hogwarts is the finest school of Witchcraft and Wizardry in the whole of Great Britain--”

“And, how,” Lily replied cutting her off. “would you know that? You’re a muggle, mum.”

“You didn’t think I’d enroll you without doing a bit of research first, did you?” Charlotte Evans asked, a slight hint of laughter woven into her words as she tried to lighten the mood.

“So it’s a good school, so what? You know I’m smarter than eighty percent of the kids in there if not more-- why do I even need to finish up my seventh year anyway? And besides, it seems ridiculous to enroll this late now that the term’s already started.” Lily complained.

“First of all,” her mother began. “I hardly think that being four days late for the start of term constitutes as valid argument for why you shouldn’t go to Hogwarts and secondly, there is no way, Lily Marie Evans that you are dropping out of school-- you are going to graduate from some sort of secondary schooling institution so you’d better get that thought out of your head this instant.”

“Can’t I just sign up for one of those independent study type things and sit through NEWTs in the spring?” Lily whined. “It’d be perfect, mum. I could teach myself and then I could come on the road with you…don’t you want me to be with you?”

Lily added, trying a different approach at getting her mum withdraw her enrollment from Hogwarts.

Lily’s mother, a former child actress from the fifties was still very much in the public eye, although she hadn’t acted onstage or for the big screen in decades. She now worked as a talent agent and owned her own agency but was constantly traveling all over Britain, trying to discover the ‘next big name’ in cinema. Her mother was absolutely gorgeous. Witty, funny, talented, and extremely loved by the public, but her almost always cheery disposition annoyed Lily to no end.

“Darling, it’s not that I don’t want to be with you-- you know I do, but we tried that already, remember? It didn’t work out and I know you’d be sick of me and the media less than a week later.” her mother cooed.

Lily huffed, knowing her mother was right. She hated being wrong, but most of all, she hated the fact that there was no way she’d be getting out of attending Hogwarts School.

“Come on, darling-- I bet it’s ten times lovelier inside.” her mother said in an exciting voice as she lead the way toward the entrance.

Lily once again took hold of her trunk and rolled it over toward the entrance, having no choice but to follow her mother inside.

“Oh! Look how lovely, Lily!” Her mother exclaimed as she pointed out different things in the entrance hall.

Lily looked around pretending to be uninterested although, if truth be told, Hogwarts was already quite unusual, with four large hourglasses framing the great doors they had just walked through, filled with what seemed to be ruby, emerald, gold, and sapphire colored stones, a handful of ghosts gliding through the corridors-- Jenkins, the last school she’d attended didn’t even have the slightest trace of a cobweb let alone ghosts wandering the grounds-- and what looked to be one of the largest staircases she’d ever laid her eyes on. A group of boys donning yellow ties walked passed her and she noticed one of them tap the other on the shoulder while not so discretely pointing in Lily’s direction. She could feel the boys taking in her appearance. She rolled her eyes in distaste knowing she’d be getting a lot of that in the following days-- curse of being the new girl-- and watched as they disappeared into another room off to the side that seemed to be packed to the brim with students.

She turned her head at the sound of laughter coming from a set of stairs leading down which she hadn’t noticed before from which two girls, donning green and silver ties appeared. Lily noticed they were both donning skirts that were way too short to be school dress code. Then one of the girls, the blonde, noticed Lily standing there with her mum, and after prodding her friend in the ribcage and whispering something in her ear, changed their direction from the great hall where Lily had seen the yellow tied boys enter and walk toward Lily instead.

The blonde smiled at her and Lily forced a half smile as they approached. There was always at least one student, Lily knew, who was braver than the others-- brave enough to come and introduce themselves and or welcome Lily to their school.

“Hi, you must be new.” The blonde said sweetly, still smiling in an almost too friendly way. “I’m Dorea Rossier and this is my best friend Iris Bulstrode.”

“Hello!” Lily’s mother answered before Lily could say anything. “I’m Charlotte and this is my daughter Lily-- it’s nice to meet you girls.”

Lily smiled forcefully as her mother introduced her.

“Lily dear, why don’t you stay and get acquainted with these lovely girls while I attempt to track down an administrator.” Charlotte smiled.

“But, mum, I--” Lily began.

“I’ll be right back, darling!” Charlotte Evans called as she glided gracefully down the corridor and rounded the corner.

“So what school did you transfer from?” The brunette girl named Iris asked.

“Jenkins Academy.” Lily answered, omitting the fact that she’d only been there for half a year last year after having been pulled from Beauxbaton. “Don’t ask me why, it’s complicated.”

“Jenkins, huh? Well, that explains it.” Iris added, more to Dorea than to Lily.

“Yes,” Dorea nodded frowning slightly. “It explains a lot.”

“Excuse me but, explains what exactly?”

“Well, your wardrobe choice, or, lack thereof, of course.” Said Dorea.

“Although, Jenkins is located near Milan-- always had a quirky sense of fashion they did.” Iris pointed out.

“Yes, but muggle wear?” Dorea responded as if it were the worst thing in the world. “I could have sworn muggle wear was out-- its so, passé.”

“Oh, but don’t worry, love.” Iris said reassuring her.

“Yes, we’ll fix you up in no time!” Dorea said excitedly, sensing a project.

Iris nodded vigorously as Dorea kept talking. “with some new clothes and a dash of makeup you’ll fit right in here! Oh, and we might have to do something about that hair of yours-- maybe take the enchantment off because it looks a little too red to be real if you know what I mean-- Oh! But don’t worry, Iris and I won’t say a word!” Dorea finished and she made a motion with her had as if she were locking her mouth shut and throwing away the key.

Lily glanced at the two girls in front of her in shock. Completely mental, that’s what they were. Advice on how much make up she should wear? And what was she supposed to look like exactly? Like you could scrape a bit of her make up off with a knife and use it to butter your toast in the morning? Or how to dress-- now that one was rich. ‘Excuse me,’ Lily thought to herself ‘for not wanting to look so easy.’ as she took in Dorea and Iris’ too short skirts and school uniforms that looked way too tight to have been originally bought that way.

“You know, that’s really sweet of you both, really it is, but you know.” Lily said smiling sweetly as she played with the water bottle in her hands. “I’m going to have to decline girls-- you see, I think I’d rather go off looking fashionably challenged then well, going around looking like you both. Oh, and one more thing, my hair? It’s one hundred percent real where as yours-- Dorea, was it?-- strikes me more as running along the lines of Color Spell 10D.”

And with that, Lily dropped her water bottle into the front of Iris’ shirt, which wasn’t a hard feats considering the top two buttons were already undone to begin with, giving whoever looked down quite a clear view of her cleavage.

Iris screamed and Lily smiled brightly as she turned to walk away, trunk in hand.

“You bitch. What’d you do that for?!” Dorea glared at Lily angrily, now having fished the water bottle out of Iris’ front, demanding a response.

Lily flipped her hair over her shoulder.

“Well, you see, there was no trash bin around and since your friend here already looks like trash, I figured I’d dispose of my bottle in a decent manner.”

Iris looked shocked at being called trashy and Dorea’s mouth hung open at Lily’s rather blunt response.

“I-you-” The blonde girl struggled to find a decent comment to shove back in Lily’s face. “That is not a decent way to dispose of this.” she finally stuttered, holding the bottle up in front of her.

“It’s not?” Lily asked in mock shock. “Well, maybe disposing of it like this, will be more to your standards.” And with that, Lily grabbed the bottle out of Dorea Rossier’s hands, unscrewed the lid and poured its contents over the blonde girl’s head.

Lily barely had time to enjoy the scandalous shrieks escaping Dorea’s lips before she noticed her mother rounding the corner.

“Oh, Lily, there you are! Darling, the headmaster needs to see you in his office so we can get you all set up here--” Charlotte Evans trailed off as she took in the scene before her. “Erm…Lily, what exactly is going on here? And what happened to that poor girl?”

“Nothing!” Lily replied almost too quickly. “ I mean, it was just some harmless prank I expect-- water just came out of nowhere…come on mum, let’s go, I’m dying to meet the headmaster!” She said, quickly steering her mother in the direction she had come before she could question what had happened between her and Dorea and Iris.

The headmaster’s office was, like Hogwarts, quite unlike anything she’d ever seen but like everything else, Dumbledore seemed to fit well with the ambiance. He was a tall man with flowing royal purple robes. His hat, like his robes bore the same pattern, perched atop a head of snowy white hair which he wore long, like his beard. But what Lily noticed most was not the rest of his appearance but rather his warm blue eyes framed behind half mooned spectacles that seemed to hold a glimmer of a twinkle. His voice was soft but one that demanded attention and respect without needing to be stern. Lily nodded, giving him her utmost attention as he welcomed her to Hogwarts and wished her good luck on her final year, making sure to add that his doors were always open should she ever need to talk and then after offering her a lemon drop from a small dish on his desk which she politely declined, the headmaster lead her to a stool upon which sat a ratty old hat.

The hat yawned, the horizontal rip opening widely and Lily jumped back in surprise.

“Time for another sorting already? Why it seems like only a few days ago I had sorted another bunch of students-- I haven’t even had the opportunity to compose a song, Albus.” The hat replied in its raspy voice.

“No, no-- the term has already started.” Dumbledore explained to the hat. “We do, however have one late enrollment-- Miss. Lily Evans…would you mind sorting her, old hat? She’s just transferred over from Jenkins Academy.”

The hat, if possible, looked around the room, or seemed to do so.

“Well, girl, what are you waiting for? Toss me on your head and let’s see where you ought to be!” The sorting hat said, with a slight cackle.

Lily wearily looked at the hat with curiosity as she walked toward it. Someone very wise had once told her not to trust anything if you couldn’t see where it kept it’s brain.

“Go on,” Dumbledore said in his clam voice. “It will not hurt one bit, I promise, Miss. Evans.”

Lily nodded once before walking over to the stool and placing the hat over her head, sitting down.

‘This is stupid-- how’s a mangy old hat supposed to tell me which house I ought to be in?’ Lily thought.

I BEG your pardon? Old, I might be, but MANGY?

Lily gasped. You can hear me?

More like read your mind and I’ll have you know I’m descendant of Godric Gryffindor himself! I’ve beend doing this a LONG time, Miss Evans and I’ll have you know I have yet to sort any student that has passed through these doors into the wrong house.

Okay okay, I’m sorry! Lily rolled her eyes Quite a moody hat.

I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that… Came the Hat’s voice clearly near her left ear. Now let’s see…Quite ambitious, hard-headed, talented, VERY bright-- yes, you’ll do great here, indeed if you take the opportunity to learn what those here would like to teach you, but where should you be…Slytherin’s a possibility-- you possess the right traits,

you know…

Slytherin? Lily thought back to Dorea and Iris. And spend a whole year with those superficial snobs? I think not!

The hat chuckled in her ear again. By this time, Lily had figured out she must have been the only one able to hear it’s thought process since the other adults in the room just stood watching and waiting to hear it’s decision.

Are you sure, now? Well, you’re muggle born, it probably wouldn’t have worked out anyway…Very well, I’ll place you else where…

“GRYFFINDOR IT IS!” The hat proclaimed.

Yes, you’re much better suited for Godric’s old house-- you’re needed there. But I will advise you, Miss Evans, The hat spoke so only she could hear. Lily stopped in the process of removing the hat from her head and waited for him to finish. Not to be so quick upon judging others, based on the first impressions of a few-- if you take the time to look deeper rather than clumping everyone into a single category you might just learn a thing or two that books and lessons could never teach you...

Lily removed the hat and handed it back to Dumbledore, wondering if it gave advice to all students at the same time feeling a bit uneasy-- it was as if the hat knew something. More specifically something about her future she didn’t know herself.

“Excellent.” Dumbledore smiled. “I shall have one of the house elves bring up your belongings to Gryffindor Tower and now, my dear, I believe we should be getting along to the Great Hall-- the dinner feast is about to begin.”

Lily and Charlotte followed the old professor out of the office and down to the ground floor where the great hall was located.

Stopping in front of the large wooden doors, Lily glanced sideways at her mother. She could already see the tears welling up in her eyes at the thought of having to say goodbye to her youngest daughter.

“I shall let you two say your goodbyes here, but if you’ll excuse me, I must be getting to the feast.”

“Of course!” Charlotte Evans said, nodding in understanding.

“Mrs. Evans, it was a pleasure meeting you,” Dumbledore shook Charlotte’s hand diplomatically. “Lily, when you are ready, enter through those doors. I imagine you’ll be able to spot the Gryffindor table without too much difficulty as the house emblems hang directly over their corresponding tables.”

And with a slight inclining of the head, Dumbledore walked gracefully down the hallway and through another door, which, Lily presumed to be some kind of staff entrance to the dining hall.

Charlotte Evans embraced Lily tightly almost immediately after Dumbledore had bade her farewell.

“You’ll behave, won’t you, darling? And you’ll take care of yourself and write to me any chance you get?”

Lily could feel her mother’s tears soaking through her hair. Quite the opposite of her mother, she’d never been one to showcase emotion and although her mother more often than not, annoyed her to know end, Lily had to admit, she was going to miss her.

“I will mum, don’t worry. Stop crying though, you’ll make your mascara run.” Lily said, breaking away from her mother’s tight embrace.

“Right.” Charlotte Evans said, using the tip of her index finger to wipe off any traces of tears that had collected just under her eyes. “I’ll see you at the end of term then-- remember you’re taking the train back to King’s Cross.”

“I know, mum. Go. I promise I’ll be fine.” Lily said.

“I love you darling.” Charlotte Evans said, giving her daughter a watery smile.

“I know, I love you too, mum.” Lily squeezed her mother’s hand and watched as her mother turned and walked out the Hogwarts gates.

With Charlotte Evans now gone, Lily had no valid excuses left for not entering the Great Hall and so with a last deep breath she made her way toward the large oak doors.

The room, as she expected was packed with entirety of Hogwarts’ student population, each situated along four long, rectangular tables-- depending on which house they belonged to, of course and Lily was slightly surprised she was able to slip in unnoticed as she made her way toward the Gryffindor table, which, as Professor Dumbledore had mentioned earlier, was marked by four large scarlet and gold emblems floating high above the table. She was, expecting to stick out like a sore thumb, especially since she had to have been the only student not dressed in school robes but as she sat down toward the end of the table in the first vacated and slightly solitary spot she found, Lily was glad to note that everyone around her seemed to be quite intent in their own dinner conversations to even notice her. And so, glad to not be the center of attention for once on her first day at a new school, Lily pulled a plate of steaming food, figuring she might as well tuck into a hearty meal.

James Potter forced a laugh at his friend Peter’s feeble attempt at joke telling. He had often times in conversation been asked why he was friends with the rather round and very forgetful boy. It was easy for them, James figured to see why he would be friends devastatingly handsome Sirius Black, who was just as popular if not more than James himself was, or with, kind and thoughtful Remus who was top of his class and easy on the eyes as well but Peter? Well, they just couldn’t understand where he fit into the equation. James didn’t care though, Peter had been, along with Remus and Sirius, his best friend since first year-- so what if he wasn’t the brightest bulb in the bunch? James didn’t care, and he knew that neither Sirius or Remus did either. Peter was loyal and a great friend and that was all that mattered.

He smiled slightly, listening as Sirius began retelling a story he’d heard a hundred times before and James felt his eyes, framed by wire rimmed glasses, begin to wander around the great hall-- first up to the staff table, then to the Slytherins, Hufflepuffs, then the Ravenclaws, until he had come full circle and arrived at the Gryffindor table once more. His eye caught sight of something bright to the left and across from him, and trailing his eyes back, his line of sight landed on a head of darkly colored red haired girl who was sitting alone, though she didn’t at all give off the impression that she minded one bit-- sitting alone that is. He had never seen this girl before- not in his almost seven years at Hogwarts, of that he was sure because James knew, he would have definitely remembered meeting a girl with hair like hers.

James felt Sirius tap his shoulder. He turned, staring into Sirius’ questioning grey eyes and blinked twice.

“Huh?” James asked, confused.

“I said, could you pass the mashed potatoes? Jesus, Prongs, I knew you were blind but not deaf.” Sirius grinned good naturedly.

“Sorry,” James said, sheepishly, handing over the tray of mashed potatoes and watched as Sirius ladled some onto his plate.

“Hey, Padfoot-- do you by any chance know who that is?”

“Do I know who, who is?” Sirius asked, looking up from his food.

“That girl, the one sitting over by the edge of the table.” James said.

“The redhead?” Sirius asked. “Huh. That’s strange…sorry, mate, I have no idea who that is-- she’s definitely too old to be a first year though so she must be new seeing as I’ve never seen her before.”

Sirius shrugged his shoulders and went back to his conversation with Remus.

James stared at the girl in wonder, thoughts and questions swimming in his head as he tried to think up theories about who she was. Suddenly, it was as if the girl had heard his thoughts for she turned her head and in an instant, James felt a pair of striking green eyes locking with his and was surprised to find that although he was embarrassed from having been caught staring at her, he could not break the gaze. He felt his cheeks flush slightly and noticed a tinge of red scattered across hers as well though her eyes held a contemplative look, as if she were trying to figure him out just by looking at him and so, James did the only thing he could think of doing at the moment and flashed her one of his infamous lopsided grins-- a smile he knew, made most girls go weak in the knees. But if James was expecting a smile in return, he was sorely disappointed for the girl merely shook her head as if trying to shake a thought from her brain and looked away.

It took Lily all but five minutes before the familiar feeling of being watched washed over her and almost reflexively, she found herself looking up. What she had not expected, however was to find a pair of arguably one of the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen staring straight back at her. They belonged to a boy who seemed to be about the same age she was, sitting across the ways a bit. He must have been tall, she thought, for even sitting down, he was at least a few good inches taller than a sandy haired boy sitting across from him, and handsome. Yes, he could definitely be categorized as handsome though his hair was excruciatingly disheveled but somehow, on him, it worked. Lily felt like a deer caught in the headlights, unable to move, or in this case, break her gaze from this strangers’ and she cocked her head to the side slightly, trying to figure out why this was. She noticed his cheeks flush but then, he flashed her a brilliant smile-- one she knew he knew to be charming, and her thoughts were confirmed as a group of girls sitting rather close to her, obviously looking at the messy haired boy, giggled silently at the sight. Lily rolled her eyes inwardly and shook the thoughts from her head, finally able to break from the boy’s gaze. She knew his type: gorgeous, popular-- a jock, no doubt. Yes, most definitely a Quidditch player, Lily would bet money on that. And more importantly, probably one hundred percent full of himself, of this, Lily was sure-- especially judging by the handful of giggling girls sitting at her table, staring adoringly at him.

In every school she had ever attended, the student body could easily be classified into neat little predictable categories, and Hogwarts, Lily was now convinced, was no different.

A/N: So, what did you guys think? This is only the first chapter ((obviously)) and I’ve got a pretty good idea of where I’m going with it but I’m not sure how long it’s going to be. Sorry if the characters ((especially the Slytherin girls)) seemed a bit Mary Sue-ish in this chapter but it was necessary as Lily believes she’s got everyone figured out, but don’t worry, this is definitely NOT going to be one of those typical M.S./Loner!Lily stories.

But Anyway, what do you guys think, honestly-- does it pique your interest? Should I keep going? Should I drop it completely? Drop me a review and let me know!