Reflections of Perfection

Nousia

Rating: PG13
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 6
Published: 06/05/2007
Last Updated: 06/05/2007
Status: completed

She never imagined it would hurt this much.

Chapters

1. Reflections of Perfection

1. Reflections of Perfection

Title: Reflections of Perfection

Summary: She never imagined it would hurt this much.

Word Count: 722

Rating: PG-13

Warning: Let it be known that this fic does not show Ginny in the best light. So if you're a Ginny fan and/or you don't like Harry/Hermione...don't read it. And if the fic sounds weird and/or confusing to you, don't worry - it's meant to be that way. And this also contains spoilers for HBP, so..if you haven't read that yet..obviously don't read this.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine; he's all Hermione's J.K. Rowling's. The (loosely translated) lyrics "lucky are those who live in love, how strange are those who die in love" comes from the song "Humko Maloom Hai." The song itself comes from the Hindi movie Jaan-E-Mann. And the lyrics "most of all, most of all, it's built to last" comes from the song "Built to Last" by Melee (which is an awesome, awesome band you should definitely check out). The only thing I own is this fic. Yep.

Author's Notes: Hi all! It's been a while since I've uploaded something. Sorry about that. I'm currently finishing up my senior year of high school (go '07!). I had to take a break from the Internet and stress out about college and stuff. Sounds like fun, no? Anyway, that's all done, and my future's secure...which means that I can write! Yay!

And for those who are wondering about The Beast and the Unlikely Beauty, the next chapter will be posted soon. I promise. With that said, enjoy the fic.

This goes out to the one and only Sandra, just because. I hope you like this.

This takes place during and after HBP, if that makes any sense. You'll see what I mean..

- - -

lucky are those who live in love, how strange are those who die in love.

She never imagined it would hurt this much. I'm freezing. Turning cold on the inside.

They look so perfect together.

So perfect, so wrong, so beautiful, so deceiving. It's a bloody broken fairy tale.

She sees the adoring looks they share, the small smiles they cover behind their hands. They're in their own world, one that no one cannot enter or understand except for the two of them.

His ideal girl, everyone whispers. Don't they look absolutely perfect together? I wish I had something like that. It's just like a fairy tale! She's the damsel in distress and he's her knight in shining armor.

She can't believe her ears. That title doesn't fit him. He's clumsy, shy, awkward, unsure - the unlikely hero.

(It's enough to make her want to vomit.)

There's a price to pay for perfection.

we bleed the same.

We're all fools, she realizes. We only acknowledge what we want to see. (That is perfection.)

Never the truth.

hear the bells ringing.

She feels fake. Wearing a plastic smile, she stands near them - I feel like a Barbie doll. Acting is all she can do right now. Only for him, only for him. His happiness is her happiness. If you're happy, I'm happy.

All lies. I can't even be honest with myself.

our story is grand.

She wanted to be with him. That was her ambition. And she got him.

That is the cost of desire; what you want will never be enough. You will always want moremoremore.

She wants more than just his name and fame.

I want the glory. I want to be known, to hear my name shouted from everyone's mouths. I want to be loved. I want to be important. I want to feel important. I want everything. (She told me that once.)

Was she being honest then?

maybe love is just a requiem for the soul.

Can you afford to deceive yourself that easily? She can't help wondering.

(It's so easy to lie to ourselves.)

It's possible. They've all had enough experience. (Lying comes easy with time.)

She wishes she knew.

Maybe then it wouldn't hurt so much.

rinse, repeat.

He wishes he could see her smile. He needs some reassurance that this is right, that being like this, that feeling like your heart's about to explode any moment is more than fine.

This is real, this is good.

He takes his eyes off of her for a minute - his green orbs scan the crowds, wanting to catch a glimpse of brown bushy hair, anything. Finally he finds his target.

Her heart stops when their eyes meet. When he smiles at her it hurts even more.

She looks away.

Save yourself while you still can.

it's been a long time coming.

Is he too afraid to take a chance? She sees the look on his face and can feel her heart breaking slowly.

He can't afford to. He can't lose everything again. This realization only makes her more determined to fight. So in the end he can be saved from himself. From the darkness that's trying to consume him.

(The fairy tale didn't end with a happily ever after - only in heartbreak and tears.)

Most of all, most of all, it's built to last.

She sits next to him and takes his hand. For once, let me save you. Let me be the strong one.

I can't be a surrogate Dumbledore, but know that I'll be here right next to you. By your side, where I've always been. She says quietly. I am not going to let you go through this alone.

He holds her hand tightly. An unspoken thank you. She squeezes back.

He needs her more than ever now.

we never stop living.

A year later. She grew up a long time ago.

Are we really innocent when we're young?

They are no longer naÃ¯ve and foolish. Innocence comes with a price, they've learned. There's always a price to pay for everything. Especially perfection. She has closed her heart to everything else except him; he's all she knows now. She drinks him in and breathes him out.

She can feel herself becoming alive again. She's coming back to life after so many months of being dead.

I'm burning.

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