Despair by h-hr-4eva Rating: PG13 Genres: Angst Relationships: Harry & Hermione Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5 Published: 16/08/2007 Last Updated: 16/08/2007 Status: Paused A dark, depressing story with a suicidal theme. Doesn't really matter what books you have read. Please read and review. May occaisionaly add a chapter or two but don't count on it. 1. untitled ----------- Hi, this story will alternate between the main characters POV’s, at the moment it is a one shot but there may end up being an epilogue. It is very angst, and has a dark and suicidal theme. If that bothers you please stop reading now. Also it is unedited so any mistakes are my own. Constructive criticism is welcomed. Harmony forever! Maddison Despair Harry’s POV “Harry! What *are* you doing?!?” I freeze, the knife in my hand trembling. “Nothing?” I reply, whishing that she would just leave and let me do what I was about to start, or end, however you want to look at it. Hermione gave me one of her famous stares. “And the knife?” I swallow nervously, desperately trying to think up a decent excuse. “Er... I thought I might try my hand at carving.” I offered weakly. “With what wood?” I paused, suddenly remembering where we were. “The room of requirement.” I mutter. “What does that have to do with any- Oh. But you wouldn’t be able to take it out of the room once you were done.” She countered, finding holes in my poorly constructed lie. “Maybe I don’t want anyone to see it!” I exclaimed, grasping at straws. “I don’t believe you, now-“ She was instantly cut off as I *silencoe*d her and put her in a full body bind. I instantly regretted it but I couldn’t back out now. Placing the knife on the table that had conveniently appeared beside me, I took Hermione to a deserted classroom nearby. She was looking at me with eyes filled with hurt, anger, sorrow, sadness, worry, and something else I couldn’t decipher, but I couldn’t, wouldn’t, relent. Once back in the room of requirement I picked up the knife again and put the few last regrets out of my head, not that there were many, the main one being that I would never get to see Hermione’s smiling face again, but it would be a small price to pay. As I slipped into blissful unconsciousness I smiled. I was free at last. Hermione’s POV As I felt the charms dissipate I knew what Harry had done, I had know, or rather, suspected what he had been about to do when I walked in, but I had wanted to hear him say it himself. Even as I ran to the room of requirement I knew there was little to no hope of Harry still being alive. I took no more than three steps into the room before my suspicions were again confirmed. I don’t know how I managed to get him to the hospital wing, but next thing I know Madam Pomfrey was shaking her head at me sadly saying “I’m so sorry” over and over. I burst into tears as Madam Pomfrey led me over to a bed, soothingly rubbing my back. This gesture only made me cry harder as it was exactly the sort of thing harry would have done. As she fed me a calming draught I saw Ron walk in. He took one look at me before walking over to me and enveloping me in a hug. I started crying again and leaned into the hug. Ron’s POV I was a bit surprised when the little midg- I mean first year came up to me and said that I was wanted in the hospital wing. When I arrived there and saw Harry lying there in one of the beds, bloody, pale and still, then I saw Hermione sitting on one of the beds, looking like she had been crying and devastated. When I walked over to her and gave her a hug she started crying almost immediately. Confused I looked over to Madam Pomfrey questioningly. She just shook her head and mouthed ‘ask Hermione’. Once Hermione had calmed down I asked her what happened and she told me everything, and in great detail, how she had walked in, how he had jinxed her, how she had found him and brought him back. “Did you get to tell him?” I asked cautiously. “No,” She replied sadly, “that’s why I was looking for him, to tell him, but then I saw the knife and...” A few minutes later she was composed enough o continue. “What if... he found out... somehow...and that’s why he... did... it?” She asked brokenly. I felt a brief flash of anger at her for even thinking such a thing, but it quickly disappeared. “NO!” I said rather forcefully. I took a couple of deep, calming breaths before continuing. “Anyone would be lucky to have your love; Harry wouldn’t have done...it, if he had known. No one would have done anything remotely like that if they had your love! Bloody hell Hermione! Don’t even think like that!” As she started to draw herself away from me I wondered if I had gone too far. She ran out of the hospital wing, I thought of following her for a second but decided she needed some time alone. I looked at Harry, and shook my head sadly before heading g back to Gryffindor tower. I needed some time alone as well.