Rating: NC17
Genres: Romance, Mystery
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 7
Published: 07/12/2008
Last Updated: 19/09/2009
Status: Completed
When Harry finally kills Voldemort something goes seriously wrong. Harry now has a major part of Voldemort's soul inside himself and there is only one way to remove Voldemort's spirit that won't kill Harry. This way will change Harry's and Hermione's lifes forever.
Forever and beyond
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. All I've got are the books, the DVDs, some fan items,
my laptop, my imagination and my undying love for Harmony.
A/N: This chapter takes place at the end of year seven, during the final fight. I'm completely ignoring Deathly Hollows though. So don't be confused, because the beginning of the chapter has nothing to do with the final fight in DH. I'm ignoring Dobby's and Hedwig's death, too, simply because this is my story and I can do whatever I want with it. I'm using a few things mentioned in Deathly Hollows though, for example that Hermione sent her parents to Australia.
Chapter 1
Harry Potter was standing in a clearing at the entrance of the forbidden forest, facing his greatest enemy, Lord Voldemort. It was only the two of them. A fight wizard against wizard. No Death Eaters to protect their master, no friends standing by Harry's side. That was the way Voldemort had wanted it. He wanted to proof once and for all that he was the most powerful wizard alive and that no teenage boy was able to beat him. Voldemort had switched wands with Lucius Malfoy and Harry was fighting with Ron's wand. Both wizards didn't want another surprise like the one three years ago. While they were fighting, Death Eaters were trying to take Hogwarts over. Harry hoped the prefects had at least had enough time to evacuate the younger students. And above all, he hoped that his friends were alright. No, you can't think about them, now. You can't afford to wonder if they are dead or alive. Not now.
"Let's see how strong you are without the help of your parents, Potter," Voldemort challenged him.
Harry met Voldemort's gaze. "I’m surprised that you have the guts to face me without your Death Eaters to save you, Tom." Harry answered, intentionally using Riddles detested first name.
"Ready to meet your mudblood mother?" asked Voldemort.
"Ready to go to hell?" Harry asked back.
After that, everything happened very fast. "Avada Kadavra!" Both wizards said the
spell at the same time. Using his seeker reflexes, Harry tried to jump out of the curses range,
trying to keep his wand pointed at his opponent at the same time. Two flashes of green light
blinded Harry and he found something very powerful hit him with a force that threw him back against
a nearby tree. That's it. I'm dead. Harry thought.
But he didn't feel dead. He felt different, but not dead. On the other hand, how could he know
how being dead felt? Harry tried to identify the sensations he felt. He felt pain. His whole body
hurt from the hard collision with the massive oak. He could feel blood running down his cheek where
one of the branches had cut his skin. That wasn't the unfamiliar feeling though. He knew pain.
He had felt pain more often than he could remember and he had definitely felt worse than he was
feeling now. No, that wasn't it.
He felt something inside himself that he hadn't felt before. He felt power. It almost felt as
if he could feel the magic running through his veins. Harry stood up, ignoring the protest of his
hurting muscles. He reached for his wand and searched the clearing. Where was Voldemort? Had he hit
him?
Harry spotted a body lying a few meters away from him. Carefully, newer lowering his wand, Harry made his way towards Voldemort. When he was standing next to him, Harry immediately saw that the most feared wizard of the century was dead. Lifeless eyes were wide open and stared at Harry in an expression of utter surprise. The eyes weren't the angry red eyes Harry knew from his previous encounters with Voldemort. They were Tom Riddles eyes, looking misplaced and grotesque in a face that barely resembled a human being anymore.
Harry was brought back to reality when he heard a hushed noise. It sounded like glass breaking, but Harry wasn't sure, because the sound was too far away. Hogwarts! Harry thought. The fight in there obviously wasn't over and his friends needed him.
When Harry got nearer to the school, he saw what had caused the sound he had heard in the forest. Several windows in the Gryffindor tower were broken and Harry could see flashes of light in several colours behind the broken windows. Harry felt panic rise in his chest. The Death eaters had invaded the Gryffindor tower! Suddenly, Harry had only one thought: Hermione! The young wizard ran as fast as his feet would carry him and soon he had reached the castle.
What he saw there could only be classified as a scene of destruction. The gate was gone, obviously blown away by an angry Death Eater. Somebody had obviously put on a fight. Some of the knight statues lay on the floor and several of the paintings were blemished by angry cuts, probably from misplaced curses. The trail of destruction ran all the way through the castle. Wherever Harry went he saw cuts in the walls, burned curtains, overturned furniture and scattered school bags. The worst thing was the bodies though. In some of the corridors he passed he saw students lying on the ground, some clearly dead, some might just be unconscious. Harry knew he should stop by each of them to search for a pulse, but he couldn't. He was devastated to see the bodies people he had seen every day during the past years, but right now his main concern were his friends. The mere thought of seeing Hermione's lifeless body on the floor made Harry feel sick and he ran faster than he had ever run in his life. When he reached the tower Harry saw that the portrait of the fat lady had been blown away just like the entrance gate.
Harry needed a moment to assess the situation. It looked like the majority of the Hogwarts staff, nearly everybody from the DA and several members of the Phoenix order were there, fighting off dozens of Death Eaters. Ron was the first of his friends Harry spotted. He was fighting against Dolohov, the bastard who had hurt Hermione during the battle at the Ministry in fifths year. Dolohov was giving Ron a hard time, but his friend seemed to have the situation under control. Next to Ron he could see Ginny, who just escaped a blasting curse from Peter Pettigrew. The curse missed her closely, blowing up a nearby armchair instead. Harry could see Tonks blocking a curse from Bellatrix Lestrange. Her husband Lupin was fighting by her side, against a Death Eater whose name Harry couldn't remember at the moment. Harry also spotted Fred and George in a corner of the room, fighting with Crabbe and Goyle senior. McGonagall was in the middle of the fight with Bellatrix' husband Rodolphus. Kingsley was there, too, fighting off a Death Eater Harry hadn't seen before. But the one Person Harry was searching for most desperately was nowhere to be seen. Where was Hermione? Before Harry could decide what he should do next, Ginny spotted him standing in the entrance. "Harry!" she cried out, overjoyed. "Oh my god, Harry you are alive!"
This caused a chain reaction among the fighters. Most of the Death Eaters were stunned when they
saw Harry, because the fact that he was standing there could only mean one thing: Their Master was
gone! The teachers, students and order members came to the same conclusion and that knowledge gave
the exhausted fighters new strength. The most quick-witted of them like Lupin, Tonks, Kingsley and
McGonagall took advantage of their opponents’ state of shock and knocked them out with quick
stunning curses. The now free fighters quickly went to assist the students with their
opponents.
Unfortunately, Dolohov had recovered from his shock faster than Ron from his joy to see Harry. The
Death Eater screamed "Sectumsempra“and Harry managed to rush to Ron's side and save him
with a shielding charm just in time. Ron used the opportunity and quickly disabled his opponent
with a stunning spell as well.
"Where's Hermione?" Harry asked his friend, never taking his eyes away from the battlefield. "She's guarding the Heads' common room. She and one of the sixths year's prefects brought the younger kids up there. We didn't have time to get them out before the Death Eaters came. Hermione wanted to guard the room until the prefects could Acio the school brooms and help the kids to escape." Ron explained. Without a further word, Harry ran towards the Heads' room. Ron was following close behind, but stopped when he saw that Fred had been hit by a curse, falling and losing his wand in the progress. Ron hesitated for a second, but went to help his brother then, leaving it to Harry to help their best friend.
Harry could hear Hermione's desperate screams even from the bottom of the staircase
that led to the common room they shared as Head Boy and Girl.
When the trio had returned to Hogwarts after they found and destroyed the last remaining Horcrux in
November, Harry and Hermione had been made Head boy and girl like originally intended. Malfoy, who
had been Head boy during the first two months of the term, had thrown a fit, but McGonagall had
remained hard.
Harry could feel fear mixed with a rage he had never felt before. He would kill whoever was causing Hermione pain. When Harry reached the common room, he saw that the door had been blown away as well. The sixths year prefect, a friendly boy named Damian North, was dead. He had obviously managed to get all the children out but it had been too late to save his own life.
When Harry entered the room he didn't' pay attention to the body of his fellow Gryffindor though. All his attention was captured by the sight and sound of Hermione screaming in agony under the Cruciatus Curse of Lucius Malfoy.
"Expelliarmus!" Harry called and disarmed Malfoy, who hadn't seen him coming. Before he knew what was happening with him, Malfoy was the one screaming in agony while Harry tortured him. Harry felt a burning hatred he hadn't known he was capable of filling him as he kept his wand pointed at Lucius Malfoy. He would die for what he had done to Hermione, but before he died Harry would torture him until he begged to be killed! Harry was so absorbed in his rage that he didn't even notice that the floor under him started to shake. He didn't notice the wind blowing around him, lifting Hermione's schoolbooks from the table nor did he realize that the paintings decorating the walls had fallen to the floor. Harry didn't know how much time had passed. Seconds, minutes or hours. He didn't know and he didn't care. Malfoy was screaming and shaking, begging Harry to stop and Harry was enjoying every second of this. Then suddenly a soft, familiar voice brought Harry out of his rage induced haze.
"Harry!" Hermione called softly and Harry's head turned around to look at
Hermione. She was sitting up now, shaking and watching him with a shocked expression, tears
streaming down her cheeks. What am I doing here? Harry wondered suddenly. Hermione needed him and
he was wasting his time with Malfoy! Harry quickly released the Death Eater from the Cruciatus
curse, just to point his wand again at the helpless man a second later. "Avada Kadavra!"
Harry said and for the second time this day he killed a man. Only this time, he didn't do it
because he had to, but because he wanted to.
Harry didn't even waste a second to look at the man he had killed, but hurried over to
Hermione.
"Hermione, are you okay?" Harry asked as he knelt down beside his friend. Hermione looked up to Harry and gasped when she saw his face close-by for the first time since he had entered the room.
"Harry, what happened to your eyes?!" Hermione asked stunned.
Harry was confused. "What's wrong with my eyes?"
Before Hermione had time to answer they were interrupted by Ron who was storming into the room. "Hermione, Harry, are you okay?"
Harry turned to look at his friend. Like Hermione, Ron gasped when he saw Harry's eyes. "Bloody hell, Harry!"
"Can at last anybody explain to me what's wrong?" he asked angered, turning to Hermione again.
"Go away from her!" Ron demanded and when Harry turned to face Ron again he saw that his friend was pointing his wand at him. "
"Damn, Ron, have you gone insane?" Harry yelled, standing up and raising his wand instinctively. "It's me! Harry!"
"I'm not so sure of this!" Ron replied.
"Put the bloody wand down and tell me what's going on for god's sake!" Harry yelled and made a step towards his friend.
Before Harry knew what was happening to him, Ron called "Petrificus Totalus!" Harry felt his limps go numb and a second later he crashed to the floor, hitting his head painfully at the hard wood.
"Are you mental?!" Hermione screamed at Ron and a second later she was kneeling beside him, raising her wand to release Harry from her boyfriend's spell.
"Hermione, don't! You don't know if that's still Harry in there! Maybe he is possessed by You-Know-Who!" Hermione looked up, glaring at her friend.
"Damn, Ron, Harry saved me! Malfoy tortured me and Harry killed him! Does that sound like something a person who is possessed by Voldemort would do?"
Before his friends were able to finish their argument Harry heard footsteps of several people coming from the stairs. Harry panicked. What if some of the Death Eaters had managed to knock their opponents of and were coming to attack them now? Harry could see Hermione stand up and point her wand at the entrance. He assumed that Ron was doing the same thing, but couldn't see it from his position. Harry hadn't felt that helpless since he had been forced to watch Dumbledore being killed. To his relieve, the voice Harry heard next belonged to Lupin.
"What's going on here?" His former professor asked.
"Harry is possessed by You-Know-Who or something!" Ron told him.
"No he isn't!" Hermione objected. "Something must have happened to Harry in the forest. His eyes... they are red, like Voldemort's, but Harry is not possessed! He saved me! He killed Lucius Malfoy! Remus, tell Ron that somebody who is possessed by Voldemort wouldn't do that! In the mean time, I'll remove the curse that Ron used on our friend!" Hermione stated angrily.
"Miss Granger, wait a minute." The new voice belonged to Professor McGonagall.
"Professor!" Hermione exclaimed. "You can't seriously want to leave Harry bonded! He didn't do anything, except for saving the Wizarding World of course. He must feel horribly lying there completely motionless. He can't even see what's going on and I’m sure he is as confused as we are."
"Miss Granger, I wasn't going to tell you to leave Mister Potter bonded. I just want you to take his wand before you release him."
"But Professor..." McGonagall interrupted her student. "If we are convinced that Mister Potter is still completely himself after we examined him, he will get his wand back."
"Yes, Professor," Hermione gave in, but she sounded everything but pleased.
A moment later Hermione was kneeling beside Harry again, looking in his eyes. "Harry, I have to take your wand." she said apologizing. Harry blinked one time to show her that he understood and wasn't mad at her. Hermione nodded and took Harry's wand out of his rigid hand, before she pointed her wand at him and said the counterspell.
"Thanks." Harry muttered and sat up.
Hermione hurried to assist him. "Slowly, Harry. You hit your head pretty hard, you might have a concussion."
"I'm fine." Harry argued. He looked around and saw that Ron, Lupin and McGonagall were standing at the door, wands in hand and were carefully watching him. Harry turned back to Hermione. "Do I really have Voldemort's eyes?"
Hermione looked uncomfortable. "Well...yes."
Harry looked away from her. "I'm sorry. It must be horrible to look at me."
To Harry's surprise, Hermione took his face in her hands and forced him to look at her. "Harry, it could never be horrible for me to look at you. Not after I was so afraid to lose you for all these years. When I look at you, I'm just happy that you are alive and with me. I'm sure we'll find a way to work everything else out."
Before Harry was able to say anything, Hermione pulled him into a firm hug. Harry returned the embrace and held Hermione as tight as possible and finally he felt an immense relieve. He was holding Hermione in his arms. She was alive, he didn't lose her. Right now, nothing else mattered. And in this moment, Harry realized that he loved Hermione. He didn't love her like a friend or like a sister, but in the way a man loved a woman. He loved her in the way you could only love your soulmate. Harry finally realized that Hermione was everything to him and that he couldn't live without her. Great! Harry thought sarcastically. Could there be a worse moment to realize that you are in love with your best friend, who happens to be your other best friend's girlfriend who happens to be your girlfriend's brother? Could his life get any more complicated?
He didn't have much time to think about his love life, because Professor McGonagall addressed him as soon as Hermione had ended the hug. "Mister Potter, can you tell us what happened during your fight with Voldemort?"
Harry thought about the question for a moment. "Everything went really fast, a lot faster than I thought it would. We met in the forest, talked for a few moments and when we started to fight, both of us used the Avada Kadavra immediately. We spoke our curses at the same time, I think. I tried to escape Voldemort's curse and at the same time keeping my wand at him. Then, all I remember was that there was blinding green light and something very powerful hit me. The force of whatever it was made me stumble and crash into a tree. When I stood up, I saw that Voldemort was dead. His eyes were open and I could see that they weren't red anymore, but brown like they were when he still was Tom Riddle. I thought that it was strange, but didn't give it much thought. I came back here as fast as I could to see if my friends needed my help."
McGonagall and Remus looked thoughtful. "Harry, do you feel different since then?" Lupin asked.
Harry nodded. "Yes, I do. It's hard to describe. I feel more powerful somehow. And when I came in here and saw how Malfoy hurt Hermione, I felt... Remus, I have never felt that angry. I've been so angry that I wanted to kill somebody before. I felt like that with Sirius when I thought he had betrayed my parents and then with Pettigrew. But I didn't have the urge to torture them. But today... I did torture Malfoy and I enjoyed it!" Harry admitted, shocked with himself.
Hermione laid a hand on Harry's shoulder, silently telling him that she didn't judge him. "What does this mean, Professor?" she asked the Head Mistress. "Can something like that happen when two killing curses collide?"
McGonagall looked thoughtfully at her brightest student. "Well, usually no. When two killing curses are spoken at the same time, both fighters die under normal circumstances. In this case, the circumstances aren't normal though. Mr. Potter has had a part of Voldemort inside himself since he was an infant. And since forth year, Voldemort has a part of Mister Potter inside him, because he took his blood. It's possible that this connection caused a further exchange between Mister Potter's and Voldemort's soul when their spells met."
"But, when Voldemort's curse hit me and mine hit him, why is he dead and I'm not?" Harry asked confused.
"That's a difficult question, Harry," Lupin admitted. "I've got a theory concerning that though. The part of Voldemort's soul that you carried inside yourself never made you become another Horcrux, because Voldemort never performed the dark ritual that was necessary to complete the process. On the other hand, I assume that the ritual Voldemort performed on you during your forth year resembled the process of making an Horcrux. He took something from you and placed it into himself, performing a dark ritual while doing so. That could have caused Voldemort to become a Horcrux of you. And like you know, a person cannot die as long as his Horcrux exists. I assume that Voldemort's curse hit you a moment before yours hit him. You would have died, if the fact that Voldemort still lived hadn't protected you. On the other hand, your spell could kill Voldemort, because he didn't have a proper Horcrux left." explained Lupin.
Harry looked at his former Professor, still trying to understand properly what he had just explained. He wasn't surprised to see that Hermione had been faster in understanding the explanation though. "That's logical. There's only one thing I can't understand. Why didn't the same thing happen to Harry that happened to Voldemort 16 years ago?"
Lupin and McGonagall looked very uncomfortable when they heard their clever student asking this question.
"What?!" Harry asked. "You just told me that a Horcrux of me was created without me even knowing about it. You can just get it over with and tell me all the bad news."
McGonagall sighed. "If Mister Lupin's theory is correct, you are only protected by the part of Voldemort's soul that was transferred to you tonight. What's left of your own soul is too weak to stay inside a human form. The fragments of your soul are only held in place by the part of Voldemort you have inside yourself."
Harry was shocked. "Does that mean, my only choice is to either live with a huge part of Voldemort's soul inside me forever or to become the same kind of creature Voldemort was until he came back?"
"Well, there might be a third way." McGonagall answered hesitantly "But it is not easy and it doesn't only involve you, Harry."
"What does that mean?" Hermione asked frantically. "If there is a way to help Harry we must try it, no matter how complicated it is!"
"This isn't really my department. Before I can say more, I have to consult Professor Babbling. She isn't only a very competent teacher for ancient runes, but knows much about celtic rituals, too. We should meet again, when Mister Lupin and I have talked to her. I suggest that Miss Granger and Mister Potter go to see Madame Pomfrey in the mean time. I'll send Fawkes to the Infirmary as soon as I know more. „
An hour later, Harry and were in the Infirmary, separated from the rest of the room by a privacy curtain. Hermione had charmed Harry's classes so nobody could see his eyes during their walk through the castle. Hermione was still a bit shaken from the Cruciatus curse and Harry had insisted that she laid down in one of the beds until Mcgonagall messages would come. Harry had gotten a potion to help his numerous bruises and scratches heal faster. Finally, the friends saw Fawkes fly into the room. He sat down next to Hermione on the bed and held out his foot for Harry, so he could take the note that was attached to his ankle.
Dear Mister Potter,
Mister Lupin, our Ancient Runes Teacher Professor Babbling and I are waiting for you in my office. The Password for the entrance is 'Gryffindor Lion'. Please bring Miss Weasley with you.
Sincerely,
Minerva McGonagall
Chapter 2
"Ginny? Why does McGonagall want to see her?" Harry asked confused.
"I don't know. Maybe she just thinks Ginny has a right to be informed. She is your girlfriend after all," Hermione reasoned.
"Yeah, right," Harry said, not sounding very happy. Harry's tone didn't go unnoticed by Hermione. "Is something wrong between Ginny and you?"
No, everything is great, except for the fact that I'm in love with you and not with Ginny.
Harry knew he couldn't tell her that, so he settled for the part of the truth he could say without ruining his friendship with Hermione.
"It's just... all the time since we came back from our search for the Horcruxes, I haven't really been able to talk to Ginny. I think I withdraw from her. I knew Voldemort would come sooner or later and I haven't really been able to think of anything else. I didn't want to scare Ginny by telling her about my worries. We drifted apart and I'm not sure if we know each other at all," Harry confessed.
Hermione tried to comfort Harry. "Maybe you two just need some time to get to know each other better when all this is over."
That won't change the way I feel, Harry thought. "Yeah, maybe."
"Let's go and find Ginny. I really want to know what Professor McGonagall has found out," Hermione suggested.
"Are you sure you're feeling good enough to come with me?" Harry asked concerned. It had barely been two hours ago that Hermione had been tortured after seeing a fellow student die.
"I'm fine, Harry," Hermione stated firmly. "And nobody will stop me from coming with you." Harry knew he had no chance to talk Hermione out of joining him. He knew how she was when she was set on something. SoHarry and Hermione went back to the Gryffindor tower together to look for Ginny.
The portrait of the fat lady had been replaced by a painting of another lady. Harry had no idea who she was. Hermione would probably know it, but he wasn't interested enough in the woman's identity to ask.
Inside the common room the worst damage had been repaired, but it was still evident that a fight had taken place here. The broken windows had been repaired and the damaged curtains and paintings had been removed, but there were still several cuts in the wallpaper where curses had missed their aim and damaged the walls instead. The most evident change was that the usually busy common room was exceptionally calm. Many of the Gryffindor's were still in the Hospital wing and some others were sitting at the bedside of a severely hurt friend or relative. And then there were the ones who wouldn't come back. The prefect Damian North and Colin Creevy. It was really strange not to hear the Creevy brothers greeting Harry enthusiastically like they normally did.
Harry looked around the room until he spotted Ginny and Ron sitting on a couch at the far end of the room. Ginny looked up at Harry in surprise when she spotted him and Hermione. "Harry! Are you...okay?" she asked hesitantly. Her nervous gaze told Harry that Ron had explained what had happened to him.
"If you mean if I still have a part Voldemort's soul inside me, the answer is yes," Harry answered bitterly.
"Damn, Harry, can't you finally stop saying that name?!" Ron exclaimed.
"He is dead, Ron! There’s no need to be afraid of his name anymore!" Hermione answered angrily.
"We all thought that he was dead before and he wasn't! And now we know that a part of him still exists!" Ron argued.
"Do you think I'll become the next Dark Lord or what?!"
Harry could feel anger rising inside himself again and after a moment he realized that the walls of the room were shaking again. Some first year students panicked and left the room as quick as they could, the other students just stared at Harry. Ron looked at Harry, too, not knowing what to say and even Ginny looked like she was suddenly scared of him. Harry's anger and frustration grew and suddenly he heard some glasses breaking.
Hermione quickly stepped in front of Harry, placing a hand on his shoulder to sooth him. "Harry, calm down. We know that you are no dark wizard and that nothing will change that. We'll find a way to help you and we'll be there for you."
Harry took some deep, calming breaths and to his relieve the room stopped shaking. Harry looked at Ron. "Do you think that, too?"
Quickly - too quickly for Harry's taste - Ron answered. "Sure. Of course."
When Harry didn't look convinced, Ron added. "It's just ... the whole situation is really scary, you know."
"Oh, you think it's scary that I have the choice to live with a part of the Wizard I hate most inside myself or die? Well, welcome to the club."
Hermione corrected Harry automatically. "That's not completely true, actually. You wouldn't die. If the part of Voldemort's soul inside you will be removed, your own soul would be too weak to stay inside your body, but you would still exist."
"Yes, I would exist! In the way Voldemort existed when I first saw him. I would have to live in other people's bodies like a parasite and drink Unicorn blood to survive. No, thanks. I'd rather be dead."
"Don't give up, Harry! Professor McGonagall said there is a way to help you," Hermione reassured him.
Harry nodded. "Yes, you're right. Actually, that's why we're here," Harry explained to Ron and Ginny. "McGonagall sent me a note that she is waiting for me in her office and she wants me to bring bring Ginny."
"Me?" Ginny asked surprised. "What can I do that would help?"
"I have no idea." Harry admitted. "Would you come with me anyway?" Harry asked.
Ginny hesitated for a moment, quickly looking at Ron and Hermione. She didn't seem to feel comfortable at the prospect of being alone with Harry and she didn't know if her brother and Hermione would join them. Despite her obvious nervousness, Ginny nodded.
"Okay, I'll come with you."
"I'm coming, too. I'm not leaving you alone with this," Hermione stated firmly.
"I'm coming, too," Ron said. "If my friend and my sister are concerned, it's my business, too." Harry smiled at his friends gratefully, feeling slightly less miserable.
A few minutes later the four friends were standing in front of the Gargoyle statue on seventh floor. "Gryffindor Lion" Harry said and the wall behind the statue opened to reveal a moving staircase. Harry had been there before, but his friends seemed impressed by the mechanism. When they arrived at the top of the staircase, Harry knocked on the heavy oak door and immediately received the Head Mistress's permission to enter.
McGonagall looked surprised when she saw that Hermione and Ron were accompanying Harry and Ginny. She didn't object though, but wordlessly conjoured two more visitor chairs. The Head Mistress was sitting behind her desk and Lupin was sitting on a chair to her left. On her right side, Harry saw a middle aged woman whom he had seen sitting at the teachers table during the meals, but had never spoken to. He assumed that she was the Professor for Ancient Runes. For the first time in his school career, Harry looked closely at the woman. She looked friendly with her warm, amber colored eyes, maroon hair and welcoming smile.
"Miss Granger, you already know or Ancient Runes Professor. Mister Potter, Mister and Miss Weasley, meet Professor Bathsheba Babbling." The three students shook hands with the teacher before they sat down. Harry chose a chair between Hermione and Ginny and Ron sat next to his sister.
"Mister Potter, I've talked to Professor Babbling about the third option I've mentioned and she agrees with me that it should work, although we can't be sure, because your situation is special and as far as we know something like that never happened before in Wizarding history. I'll leave it to Professor Babbling to explain the details to you."
The ancient runes teacher looked at Harry. "Mister Lupin explained his theory about what happened and I think he is right. In the moment your spells collided a part of your soul was transferred to Voldemort's body and the other way around. Unfortunately, the part of your soul that was transferred to Voldemort's body died with him, so there is no way to give it back to you. The only reason that you didn't die is that Voldemort's spell hit you first. He was still alive when his killing curse hit you and ironically, that was what saved you. Your soul wouldn't have been able to stay inside your body for longer than a few seconds under normal conditions, but when the spell hit you, you already had a part of Voldemort's soul inside you and that gave your soul the strength to remain connected to your body. There are rituals with which it is possible to remove Voldemort's spirit from your body. The problem is that your soul would be too weak to remain inside your body if we did that. Your soul can't exist on its own anymore. That's why Professor McGonagall asked you to bring Miss Weasley with you. The Professor said that she is your girlfriend. Is that true?"
Harry was confused. He exchanged a quick look with Ginny. "Well, yes. Sort of. Why is this important?"
"Have you ever heard of soul bounding, Mister Potter, Miss Weasley?" Harry and Ginny shook their heads.
Professor Babbling directed her attention to Hermione, who had let out a surprised gasp when her teacher had mentioned soul binding. "I assume you know what soul binding is, Miss Granger."
"I've heard of it, but I didn't find a book that explains how soul binding works in detail, not even in the restricted section. I only know that there are ancient celtic rituals with which two lovers can create an eternal connection between their souls to become even closer than they already are," Hermione explained.
Professor Babbling smiled. "There are books that explain the rituals and their consequences in detail, but we didn't think it would be wise to make them available to a bunch of teenage couples who have been together for a few weeks and are sure that they found the love of their life. Soul bounding is a very incisive step. Two people who are bound together will be connected for all eternity. They are able to feel what their partner feels. When one partner is very upset or in pain, the other feels it, no matter how far apart they are. It's a live changing decision and there is no way to undo it."
"That's very interesting, but what does all this have to do with me?" Harry asked impatiently.
"Well, like I said, your soul is too weak to exist on its own anymore. We can give you the strength you need by binding your soul to the soul of another person in a magical wedding ceremony though. Considering that Miss Weasley is your girlfriend, Professor McGonagall thought that she is the most obvious choice."
"What?!" Harry, Ginny and Ron exclaimed at the same time. Hermione was unnatural silent. She had assumed something like that when Professor Babbling had mentioned soul binding.
"You want me to marry Ginny?" Harry asked.
McGonagall engaged in the conversation for the first time since she had introduced the ancient runes professor. "It's your and Miss Weasley's decision, but I'm afraid soul binding is your only option Mister Potter."
Harry looked from McGonagall to Ginny, unable to say anything. He was in complete shock.
"Are you saying that Harry will die if I don't marry him?" Ginny asked, as shocked as Harry.
"Considering that I don't think Mr. Potter would choose to continue living with a part of Voldemort's soul inside him or to occupy another body... yes, I'm afraid that's true," McGonagall answered gravely.
After that statement, a heavy silence filled the room. Eventually, it was Hermione who spoke first. "Why don't you say anything?!" Hermione asked Ginny furiously. "Why do you even have to think about this? It's Harry's life we're talking about!"
"Excuse me for needing a moment to think about one of the most important decisions of my life!" Ginny shouted back.
Now it was Harry's time to intervene. "You don't have to think about it, Ginny. I would never ask you to do something like that for me," Harry stated firmly.
"Harry, do you realize what you are saying? You're signing your death sentence!" Hermione said desperately.
"I'd rather die than push a woman to marry me, Hermione! You should know that!"
"You make it sound like marrying you was the greatest sacrifice! You'd be a great and loving husband and every woman could consider herself lucky to be your wife. Do you know how many women would be thrilled to marry you?! An hour ago I thought you were one of them, Ginny!" Hermione looked from Harry to Ginny, desperately trying to get them to use the only chance to save Harry's life.
"I've been happy to be Harry's girlfriend, but I haven't thought about marriage yet. I'm not even seventeen!" Ginny exclaimed clearly upset.
"Miss Weasley has a point there. We would need the permission of her parents as she is not of age yet," McGonagall said.
"Mum and Dad would never allow that," Ron stated.
"Of course they would under these circumstances. They love Harry like a son and they wouldn't want to let him die," Hermione argued.
"Let me get this straight: When Harry and Ginny do this soul binding thing, there's really no way back? They could never have a divorce?" Ron asked.
"That's not exactly right. Two people who married in a soul binding ceremony can have a divorce, but that wouldn't undo the effects of the ceremony," McGonagall explained.
Ron looked confused. "But if they can have a divorce later, where's the problem?"
"The problem is that their souls would still be bound, even if they aren't legally married anymore. Whenever one of the partners feels great joy, fear, anger or pain, the other one would feel it too, as long as they both live," McGonagall explained.
Harry and Ginny looked very uncomfortable. Although they had been together for a few months now and had known each other for years, they had never shared anything that came near the closeness McGonagall had just described.
"I can't ask Ginny to do this," Harry repeated. "What if she doesn't like me anymore in a few years and thinks she would be happier with someone else? She would never be able to move on completely. I can't make such a selfish decision." Harry explained.
"You can't make a selfish decision?!" Hermione screamed. "But that's exactly what you're doing right now! You're just deciding to leave everybody who cares about you alone! That is a selfish decision!"
Harry was shocked when he saw tears streaming down his best friend's face."Hermione, please don't cry," Harry pleaded and took Hermione's hand to help her calm down.
"I don't want to lose you, Harry," Hermione sobbed.
Harry looked up to the three adults in the room, searching for help. There had to be some other way to solve his problem. He didn't want to urge Ginny into marrying him. It wouldn't be fair to her to be married to a man who is in love with another woman. But he didn't want to die and he wanted to save Hermione the grief of losing him.
When Harry looked at Professor Babbling, he saw that the teacher was looking at his and Hermione's entangled hands with a thoughtful expression. "You and Miss Granger seem to be very close," she stated eventually.
Harry nodded. "We are. We've been best friends since first year."
"I'm sure you'd do a lot for each other," The professor continued.
"Everything." Harry and Hermione said unison.
Professor Babbling watched them intently.
"What?!" Harry asked confused. Hermione understood what her teacher was thinking though and smiled brightly. "Of course! Why haven't I thought about that sooner?!"
"Sorry, but I'm lost here," Harry said, looking from Hermione to the ancient runes teacher, waiting for an explanation.
"Harry, I want to marry you," Hermione said firmly.
Harry was speechless. It wasn't that he would mind marrying Hermione, far from it, but he was sure that she only saw him as a friend. She couldn't marry him; she was in love with his best friend! Said best friend was the one who broke the silence that had followed Hermione's words.
"You can't be serious! May I remind you that you already have a boyfriend?!" Ron argued angrily.
"I know that, Ron. We've been dating for a few months now and maybe being more than friends will work out for us. We can still try that. Professor McGonagall said we can have a divorce after the ritual has been performed. Yes, Harry and I would still be bound, but like Professor Babbling said, Harry and I are already very close. It wouldn't be a bad thing to share our feelings without words, even if we just stay friends after the ritual,” Hermione explained.
"Hermione has a point there," Lupin agreed. "I know her and Harry since their third year and there's always been a special connection between them."
"So you just want to create an eternal band between yourself and Harry and than go back to dating me as if nothing happened?!" Ron asked stunned.
"What do you suggest? That we let Harry die?!" Hermione asked furiously.
"No, of course not!" Ron answered.
"Then this is our only chance, considering that Ginny doesn't want to marry Harry," Hermione reasoned.
"I didn't say that!" Ginny contradicted. "I just said that I need time to think about it."
"Unfortunately, time is a luxury we don't have, Miss Weasley," McGonagall explained. "Voldemort was a very strong wizard with an enormous will to live. His soul will try to overtake Mister Potter's body and I don’t know how long he will be able to fight against it. The ritual has to be performed as soon as possible. Professor Babbling said that the ritual has to be performed during new moon and the next new moon happens to be tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?!" Harry and Ginny asked at the same time.
"Unfortunately, yes. I'm afraid you have only time until tomorrow at sunset to make your decision. The next new moon after that is on June, 5th and we can't risk to wait that long," Lupin answered.
"I suggest that you all retire for the night and think about the topic. We can meet here again at 9 am and continue our discussion."
The four students nodded and walked back to the Gryffindor tower. "Do you want to come with us to the Heads' common room to talk some more about this?" Harry asked Ron and Ginny.
"I'm sorry, Harry, but I need some time alone to think about this," Ginny answered.
Ron agreed with his sister. "I'd rather be alone right now, too."
Harry and Hermione just nodded and went up the stairs to the common room they shared. When Harry opened the repaired door, Hermione froze and just looked at the room where the fight had taken place. Harry looked at his friend and immediately understood what was wrong. "Let's get out of here." Harry gently said. He took Hermione's hand and let her to his bedroom, where the friends sat down on the bed.
"It must be hard for you to come back into the room where Damian died and Malfoy tortured you," Harry said emphatically.
Hermione nodded. "I can't get the scene of Malfoy killing Damian out of my head. I wonder if I had been able to save him if I had reacted a little faster.
„Hermione paused for a moment to compose herself, before she started to explain what had happened. “Malfoy and I fought for quite a long time outside of the Head's common room, while Damian was summoning brooms to get the younger students out of the castle. After a while, Malfoy used a blasting curse. I avoided the curse and it hit the door instead. Some splitters from the door hit me and I lost my balance and had to grab the stair rail..."
Hermione paused again, fighting back the tears. „The next thing I saw was that Malfoy was inside the common room and attacked Damian with a killing curse. I ran inside to attack Malfoy, but when I had reached him it was already too late and Damian was dead."
At this point, Hermione wasn't able to keep herself from crying any longer. The tears where streaming downs her face and Harry gently rubbed his friend's back. After a while, Hermione had composed herself enough to finish her story. „I was stunned for a moment and Malfoy took advantage of my moment of weakness and used the Cruciatus curse on me. One moment in which I wasn't alert and that was enough."
When Hermione had finished Harry pulled his friend in a hug. "You couldn't have done anything to save Damian. It just happened too fast. And you shouldn't blame yourself for being stunned for a moment after his death either. I wouldn't have been able to fight right after Cedric's death and after Sirius' died I was completely irrational and tried to follow him through the veil. That's human and nothing you have to be ashamed of."
Hermione looked up at Harry. "How do you always know the right thing to say?"
Harry smiled at Hermione. "That's what friends are for."
For a while they just sat there, wordlessly holding each other. Eventually Harry asked "Are you really sure you want to do this?"
"Yes, Harry, I'm sure. I couldn't bear to lose you and I really don't mind being soul bound with you. Sometimes I feel like I already was," Hermione said.
"Yes, I feel the same way." Harry agreed. He had always felt closer to Hermione than to anybody else and their bond had even become stronger during the Horcrux search.
"Do you mind if I sleep here tonight?" Hermione asked. "I think none of us should be alone after a day like this."
"No, I don't mind at all," Harry answered. He couldn't think of anything he'd rather do then hold Hermione in his arms all night.
Harry and Hermione just took of their shoes and stepped under the covers. It took a long time for them to fall asleep. Harry lay awake for hours thinking about the ritual that would take place tomorrow. He would marry the woman he loved, but it wouldn't be for real. He didn't know if he could bear being bound to Hermione but seeing her with Ron afterwards. Then an upsetting thought crossed his mind. What if Ginny changed her mind and decided that she wanted to marry him? He couldn't imagine being soul bound with Ginny, but how could he explain that he'd rather have an eternal connection with Hermione than with his girlfriend without revealing his true feelings for his best friend? Doing that wasn't an option, he knew that. If Hermione and Ron found out that he was in love with Hermione, he would probably lose them both and he couldn't risk that.
Chapter 3
After a restless sleep, Harry and Hermione woke up soon the next morning and decided to wait for Ron and Ginny in the common room. They didn't have to wait long. It was not yet seven when Ginny entered the common room, looking like she hadn't slept much either.
"Hey," Harry greeted his girlfriend awkwardly.
"Good morning," she replied and gave Harry and Hermione a nod. After an uncomfortable pause, Ginny asked: "Are you still sure you want to do this?"
Harry nodded. "Yes, we're sure. There's nothing else we can do."
"If you haven't changed your mind, of course," Hermione added, giving her friend a chance to change her decision.
"Well, I've thought about it, too, and I think Hermione is right. Harry, I really care for you and I hope that our relationship will work out. But if it doesn't, it would be really awkward to be able to share each other’s feelings for the rest of our lives. You, Ron and Hermione have been close for the last seven years though and it's very unlikely that you'll ever have a falling out. It won't be that awkward for you to share each other’s feelings. You probably don't have any secrets from each other anyways."
You have no idea. Harry thought but kept silent.
Hermione beamed at her friend. "That's exactly what I said. I'm really glad you're taking this so well."
"So, it's settled then?" Ron asked. He was standing at the foot of the staircase and had heard the end of the conversation.
"Yes, it's settled. Are you okay with this?" Hermione asked her boyfriend worriedly.
"Not really, but I would be a lot less okay with Harry dying," he answered dryly.
Harry sighed in relief. That had gone a lot better than he had expected.
"Okay then. I think we should go and take an early breakfast before Hermione and I go to meet up with McGonagall." They all hadn't eaten since breakfast the day before and Harry realized he was quite hungry. The early hour had the advantage that the Great Hall was nearly empty and Harry could avoid the stares and whispers from the whole school by showing up for breakfast so early.
When they were done eating, the friends killed the remaining time till the meeting by starting to pack their things, because school would be closing for summer early this year. Many of the students and teachers were still injured and some of the rooms in the castle were severely damaged. There was no way that exams could be taken in less than three weeks like originally planned. The train would leave as soon as the less severely injured students (the critical cases had been transferred to St. Mungo) were able to leave the hospital wing. Exams for the younger students had been cancelled for this year and the older students would take their OWLs and NEWTs during summer break.
At nine, Harry and Hermione sat in the Head Mistress's office again, together with McGonagall and Professor Babbling.
"May I take the fact that only you two are here as a sign that you have made up your minds?" McGonagall asked.
Harry nodded. "We've talked about this together and with Ginny and Ron and we have decided that this is the best way."
"Alright, then let me explain the details to you," Professor Babbling said and the students nodded.
"The bonding ritual is a very old celtic ceremony. It's a very powerful white magic ritual that is able to ban all dark spells performed on one of the partners. When the bounding is complete, Voldemort's spirit will leave Mr. Potter's body on its own. One thing is very important: It's possible that Voldemort will know what is going on. I can't tell how much of the outside world he senses while he is in Mr. Potters body. If he notices what's going on, he will try to control you, Mr. Potter. After what I've heard about you, you are a very strong-willed young man and you'll probably be able to resist him if that happens, but we should be careful nevertheless. Therefore, it's very important that he, respectively you, won't have access to a wand. That's why I have to ask both of you to give me your wands."
"Hermione already has mine," Harry replied slightly irritated and Hermione handed over both wands to the Professor.
"Good. Then we can come to the explanation of the actual ritual. The ritual has to be performed outdoors under the New Moon. We'll set everything up next to the lake. You two will have to repeat your vows after me. Afterwards, I'll have to cut your hands with a poniard, so that your blood will get mixed when you take each other’s hands. Then I'll say the celtic blessing. You won't feel anything unusual at this moment; the bounding magic will not be activated before the marriage is consummated, which has to happen in the same night."
"Consummated?" Harry asked confused. "What do you mean by that?"
Hermione had turned pale and was muttering to herself "Why haven't I thought about that? A magical marriage isn't official before it’s consummated, I should have known that this would be necessary to complete the bounding."
"What are you talking about?" Harry asked worriedly. He had no idea what was going on, but Hermione's facial expression told him it couldn't be good.
"Well... a magical wedding isn't official before the wedding night," Hermione whispered.
"What?!" Harry asked stunned. "You mean we have to ... sleep with each other?"
To Harry's surprise, Hermione looked offended at his reaction. "I know I'm not as pretty as Ginny or Cho, but I didn't think you'd find the thought of sleeping with me so repulsive."
Harry was shocked by Hermione's outburst and quickly thought what he could say to reconcile her. If Hermione only knew how wrong she was! The thought of sleeping with her was fantastic and he was sure that the pictures this thought had created in his head would be the material for many vivid dreams. He just couldn't tell her that, so he decided to stay as close to the truth as he could without revealing his true feelings.
"No! The thought of sleeping with you isn't repulsive to me! You're beautiful, Hermione."
Hermione met her friend's gaze and wished she hadn't charmed Harry's glasses to hide his eyes. She wished she could see his eyes to tell if he was sincere.
Seeing the doubt in Hermione's eyes, Harry added. "You really are, but I could never force myself on you, Hermione. I wouldn't do that to any woman, let alone you! I could never do this to you."
Hermione's features softened. "You wouldn't force me to do anything, Harry. We have to talk again to Ron and Ginny though. Ginny will probably change her mind if we tell her about this."
Harry wasn't at all happy about Hermione's suggestion, but he knew she was right; they couldn't keep that information from their partners. But what would he do if Ginny actually changed her mind? He didn't like the thought of sharing his feelings with a girl he barely knew for the rest of his life.
Harry was brought out of his musings by Professor McGonagall. "I understand that you want to talk to Mr. and Miss Weasley again. Just come by and tell me what you have decided later."
Harry promised to come and see the Head Mistress as soon as they made their decision and accompanied Hermione back to the Gryffindor tower.
They found the Weasley siblings in the common room playing a game of Wizarding chess. "Ron, Ginny, we have to talk to you in private," Harry said without preamble.
Ginny looked worried. "That sounds pretty serious."
"Well, it is. Can we talk to you in the Heads' quarters?" Harry asked. Curious what was going on the Weasleys agreed and followed their friends.
"So, what's going on?" Ron asked impatiently as soon as they had sat down.
Harry looked at Hermione for help. He wasn't keen on explaining the situation to the fiery Redheads. Hermione did look as uncomfortable as Harry was feeling, but she started to speak anyways. "Harry and I got information about the soul binding ceremony that we didn't have before and that makes the whole situation appear in a new light. Maybe it will make you change your decision, Ginny."
Both Weasleys watched Hermione now, Ginny looking confused and Ron impatient.
"Just spill it," Ron demanded.
Hermione glared at her boyfriend, but complied. "We learned today that the soul binding ritual isn't complete before the partner's have consummated the marriage," she answered shakily.
"You want to shag Harry?!" Ron screamed furiously.
"Language, Ron!" Hermione reprimanded Ron. "We are here to discuss the situation with both of you, because I thought Ginny might change her mind now," she explained as calmly as she could.
Ron turned to his sister. "Ginny, you can't want Harry and Hermione to have sex!" he explained furiously.
"No, Ron, I don't want my boyfriend to sleep with your girlfriend! And I certainly don't want Harry to die." Ginny took a deep and calming breath and looked first at Hermione and then at Harry.
"You're right, Hermione, I did change my mind. Harry, I want to marry you."
Harry thought his heart stopped a beat when he heard Ginny's words. Great, that is exactly what you were afraid of. Think, Potter and do it quickly. You have to talk her out of this.
"Are you sure, Ginny? Everything you said in the morning is still true. We don't have a guarantee that our relationship will work and I don't want you to regret your decision if you realize that I might not be the man you want to spend your life with. Let's be honest to ourselves, Ginny. We like each other, but we barely know each other."
"That's not true!" Ginny contradicted immediately.
"It isn't?" Harry asked. "Then tell me Ginny: What is my greatest wish? What is my biggest fear? Or let's start with something simpler: What's my favourite book? What kind of music do I like? Can you answer any of those questions? I'm sorry, Ginny, I really am, but I can't answer even one of them about you."
Ginny looked furious now. "No, Harry, you're right, I can't answer any of your bloody questions, because you refuse to talk to me! Whenever you have a problem you go to Hermione or Ron, but never to me! Why can't you let me in?"
Because I'm in love with another woman. I've been for a long time; I was just too blind to see it. "I don't know, Ginny. I'm really sorry for not treating you like you deserve, but for some reason, I just couldn't talk to you about certain things and I'm not sure if I will be able to in the future."
Tears were streaming down Ginny's face now. "Maybe you're right and it won't work out between us. I don't want to bind my soul to yours forever and then find out that we're not meant to be, but I don't want you to die Harry."
"I won't let that happen," Hermione said firmly. She took a deep breath to prepare herself for what she was going to say and the reactions to it. "Ginny, Harry is right. If you do this and find out you don't want to be together anymore later on, you both will be miserable and will have a hard time finding someone else when you are still connected to each other. We already agreed that it would be less awkward for Harry and me, because we already are close friends. I still think this is the best solution. Yes, I would have to spend a night with Harry, but it's only one night. After that, we can move on with our lives and take our time figuring out with who we really want to be. Ron, I know this will be awkward for all of us, but if we are really meant to be together, we can overcome this."
"You want go and spread your legs for Harry and then come back to me as if nothing happened?! I didn't know you were so cheap," Ron screamed furiously.
"Don't ever talk to Hermione like that again!" Harry hissed angrily and before anybody could realize what was happening, the glass holding Ron's juice exploded and the splitters flew right into Ron's face, leaving dozens of small bleeding cuts.
"Are you insane?!" Ron screamed. "I could have gone blind if any of the pieces had hit my eyes!"
"I didn't do it on purpose," Harry answered, being quite shocked himself. "But you deserve every single one of those cuts for saying that to Hermione," he added angrily.
"You know what?! Go and live happily ever after for my sake, but don't expect me to be there and watch. I'm off to the hospital wing," Ron yelled and left the room.
Ginny looked stunned from Ron to Harry and when Harry met her gaze, he saw outright fear in the girl's eyes. "Are you afraid of me?" Harry asked. Ginny didn't answer the question and that was answer enough.
"I can't blame you after what I just did to your brother. I really didn't do it on purpose though. I can't control what I do in my anger anymore. I'm sorry for scaring you," Harry apologized sincerely. He was still mad at Ron but not at Ginny.
"I'm sorry, Harry, but I have to get out of here. I don't know what you're capable of anymore and that scares me. I'll go check on Ron." Ginny answered and quickly left the room. Harry watched Ginny leave and then he turned his attention back to Hermione, who was fighting back the tears. "Hermione, I'm so sorry. I messed everything up between you and Ron."
Hermione shook her head vigorously. "No, Harry, Ron messed it up, not you." Hermione looked at the door through which Ron had left. "I still hope that he comes back to us. I thought our friendship was strong enough to survive everything. I didn't think anything could ever separate the three of us. Have I really been wrong?" Hermione asked under tears.
Harry wished he could say anything to comfort his friend, but he didn't know what to say to make her feel better. "I don't know," Harry answered honestly, but laid an arm around Hermione to give her at least some comfort. She moved closer to him and let her head rest against his shoulder. After a while Harry asked: "Aren't you afraid at all? You saw what I am capable of when I'm angry and Professor Babbling said Voldemort might try to completely take me over. Aren't you afraid that I'll hurt you?"
"Harry, I could never be afraid of you. I know you are too strong to allow Voldemort to control you. Every time you lost control you were angry and you had good reasons to be. You would have been angry in this situation under normal circumstances, too, although you would have been able to control your emotions. The point is, you still only do what you want to do deep down and I don't think you'd ever want to hurt me."
"Never!" Harry quickly agreed.
Hermione gave him a small smile. "See, I have nothing to worry about."
Harry frowned. "You may not have to be worried about me physically hurting you, but this will still hurt you emotionally. It would be awful for you to have to sleep with a man you don't love."
Hermione's face flushed at the mention of the wedding night, but she still looked up at Harry with a tender expression. "I do love you, Harry. I may not be in love with you, but I love you with all my heart and I know you feel the same for me. Sleeping with you will probably be... awkward, but not awful." Hermione turned even redder. "I mean, you're such a kind and caring man, surely you will be like that in bed, too... It can't become that bad, I think."
Harry blushed, too. He wasn't really comfortable talking about that topic, but he knew they had to discuss this. "You're really sure then?"
Hermione nodded firmly. "Yes Harry, I'm sure."
Harry gently took Hermione's hands in his. "Thanks for being there for me."
Hermione smiled. "I'll always be there for you, Harry."
Harry returned her smile gratefully. He wasn't feeling as nervous and miserable about the situation as he had yesterday. As long as he had Hermione by his side, everything would work out in the end.
"I'll go and talk to McGonagall then, now that all is settled," Harry announced.
"Yes, do that. Shall we say we'll meet at sunset near the lake?" Hermione suggested.
"That's fine with me," Harry agreed.
It wasn't before Harry had left that Hermione completely realized that today was her wedding day. You shouldn't think about it that way. She scolded herself. After all she wasn't really marrying Harry. Well she was, but he wasn't the man she would be spending her life with. She had thought Ron would be that man, but after the way he had acted today she wasn't so sure about that anymore. She was angry with Ron for acting so selfish and immature and for talking about her like she was some cheap slut. He should know that she wasn't like that! Yes, she was going to sleep with Harry, but only because she wanted to save his life.
After their conversation with the Weasleys Hermione was even more convinced that it was the right decision. Harry had been right yesterday when he told her that he and Ginny didn't really know each other and that was a bad basis for soul binding. Hermione wasn't sure if Harry and Ginny would become happy together and she cared too much for both of them to wish them a life in which they couldn't be happy with their true love, because they were still magically bound to each other. She on the other hand already knew Harry as well as she knew herself. She would have been able to answer each of the questions Harry had asked Ginny and she had no doubt that Harry would be able to answer those questions about her. She wondered if that applied to Ron, too. Hermione sighed and decided to stop thinking about Ron for now. When Ron was angry he just needed time to cool off before it was possible to have a reasonably sensible conversation with him. She couldn't do anything to set things straight with him right now.
Hermione decided to get Ron out of her head for now and think about what needed to be done before the ceremony. Planning always calmed her down and gave her a sense of confidence. First, she needed something to wear. It might not really be her wedding, but she didn't want to go in jeans or her school robes nevertheless. Hermione opened her wardrobe to inspect the small collection of dresses she had brought to school. Sighing, she realized that none of the simple summer dresses was anywhere near fitting for a wedding.
Great! Where do I get a dress so fast? Hermione knew that there was a store in Hogsmead that sold dressrobes, but they only made customisations and they would never manage to get a robe ready within a few hours. Hermione was brought out of her musings by a knock on the door. "Hermione, it's Tonks, can I come in?"
Hermione quickly opened the door. "Tonks! How do you know the password for the Gryffindor common room?"
"I was the one who choose it when I replaced the Portrait yesterday." Tonks explained and Hermione smiled. She should have guessed that. Who else would have chosen "Hiccup Sweets" as a password?
"McGonagall told Remus and me what you and Harry have decided," Tonks told her friend. Hermione waited for the Auror to continue, wondering what she thought of their plan. As if she had read her mind, Tonks continued. "I think you're doing the right thing. I really like Ginny, but frankly, I don't think she and Harry have a future together. They don't have anything in common besides their love for Quidditch. I think they would have become very unhappy if they had been soul bound. You and Harry have always been so close; I think the soul binding will only deepen your friendship."
Hermione smiled at her friend, thankful for the reassuring words.
"So, what are you going to wear?" Tonks asked cheerfully.
Hermione's smile faded. "I have no idea. I don't have anything with me and there is no way that the store in Hogsmead will get a dressrobe ready so quick."
Tonks grinned. "Don't worry, we'll find the perfect dress for you. There's a new store in Hogsmead that sells historical dresses. Wouldn't that be perfect for a celtic wedding? They always have some dresses ready; they would only need to make a few changes."
Hermione beamed. "Tonks, that would be great!"
"Excellent. Luna Lovegood is waiting in the entrance hall. She already knew what was going on. Don't ask me where this girl always gets her information. Anyway, we figured you'd want to get a new dress for the wedding and Luna is eager to help us find the perfect one for you," Tonks told Hermione.
Hermione started to feel her friend's enthusiasm infect her. It almost felt like this was really her wedding and she was going dress shopping with her friends like any normal bride would.
An hour later, the three friends stood in the small shop that sold historical garments. Hermione looked around in awe. She usually wasn't a sucker for pretty dresses, but she was really impressed by the beautiful cut velvet, silk and linen gowns.
"How do you like this one?" Tonks asked and pointed to a cream coloured velvet gown.
"Oh, I wouldn't take this one, Hermione," Luna interfered. "Velvet attracts glowfly fairies. You don't want them to settle in your hair and make it glow yellow, do you?" Hermione looked at her friend only mildly confused. She had gotten used to Luna talking about strange creatures all the time.
"No, I don't," Hermione agreed absentminded. She highly doubted that Luna's fairies existed, but wasn't in the mood to argue. She found the velvet gown too pompous anyways. Hermione looked around, not really knowing what she was searching for until she saw it. The gown was quite simple, but very beautifully cut. It was a white floor long gown, with golden borders on neckline and sleeves. A golden belt was wrapped around waist and hips. The sleeves were formed asymmetrical, ending at her wrists on the outside, but reaching down to her knees on the inside.
"I want to try this one on," Hermione announced. A few minutes later she was wearing the dress and smiling at the stunned faces of her friends.
"Hermione, you look so lovely! You will be such a beautiful bride," Luna exclaimed.
"Absolutely stunning. That will knock Harry for a loop," Tonks agreed.
"Hey, you are forgetting that this isn't a real wedding," Hermione protested, but couldn't help to be excited when she imagined Harry's reaction.
Tonks grinned. "That won't stop Harry from admiring you. Now all we need is the right underwear."
"Tonks!" Hermione exclaimed shocked.
"She's right," Luna stated dreamily. "You're going to sleep with Harry, so you should have underwear that gets him in the right mood."
When the three women returned to the castle after buying a set of lingerie that made Hermione blush at the mere thought of it, Hermione went to the Prefects bathroom to have a nice long bath before she met with her friends again to let them help with her hair and make-up.
At the same time, Harry was getting ready, too. Like Hermione, Harry didn't have fitting dressrobes and he wasn't keen on going shopping while everybody was staring at him. After he had just defeated Voldemort, everybody in Hogsmead would want to speak with him and he wasn't in the mood for that. He would also have a hard time explaining why he was wearing sunglasses in a store. Therefore, Harry was simply clad in black slacks, a white shirt and a black jacket. That would have to do. Harry's nervousness had returned full force during the last hours and he wondered if they had really made the right decision. He was going to marry Hermione! This was just insane.
Harry was just fighting his unruly hair with limited success, when he heard a knock on the door. "It's Remus, can I come in?"
Harry opened the door and let his father's friend in.
"Hallo, Harry. I'm here to see how you are doing. How are you feeling?" Lupin asked.
Harry considered just saying he was fine, but when he saw the genuine concern in the older man's face, he decided to be honest. "I'm incredibly nervous. In a few hours I will be connected to Hermione forever and I have no idea how this will affect our lives and our friendship, not to mention how what will happen after the wedding will affect our relationship," Harry said blushing slightly.
"I see. You are worried because of the wedding night. You're right; this will affect your relationship with Hermione, the soul binding as well as the wedding night. It will be awkward at first, but the way I know you two; this will only strengthen your friendship in the long run," Lupin tried to reassure Harry.
"It's just that friends usually don't sleep with each other," Harry murmured.
Remus watched Harry intently. "I see the thought of sleeping with Hermione unsettles you a lot. Tell me, Harry, do you find her attractive?" Remus asked.
"I think she's incredibly beautiful," Harry admitted softly.
Lupin studied the face of his best friend's son for a moment. "Harry, are you in love with Hermione?"
Harry slowly nodded. "She doesn't love me though, I know that. Hermione only sees me as a friend. I think I can live with that and hide my feelings from Hermione. Just having her in my life is enough for me. I'm just not sure if it will still be enough after I had one night with her," Harry admitted.
"Why are you so sure that Hermione only sees you as a friend?" Lupin asked calmly.
"Well, she never showed any feelings for me that went beyond friendship. She has always been interested in Ron," Harry stated matter of factly.
"And yet she decided to bind her soul to yours, even if it could mean losing Ron. Harry, I've known you and Hermione for years and I've seen how she looks at you. Her feelings for you go very deep and there were more than a few occasions when I wondered if her feelings go beyond friendship. Maybe Hermione just hasn't realized that she loves you in a more than friendly way."
Harry looked completely stunned. "You really think Hermione might love me?"
Lupin nodded. "I think that's very well possible. You two should take some time to talk tomorrow."
"Yes, we really should," Harry agreed. He felt even more nervous and uncertain than before his talk with Remus, but he felt definitely less depressed. Maybe Lupin was really right and there was a possibility that Hermione did love him back.
A/N: Yes, it’s really me, I’m finally back. I am so sorry that I left you guys waiting so long. I just finished University this week. I had my last exam in February and then had to hurry to get my final thesis ready before April 1st, because the new semester started in Germany then and I didn’t want to pay tuition fees for another semester. When it comes to my education I’m as bad as Hermione. I’m very ambitious and want to graduate with good grades, so I tend to lose myself in my studies and don’t have time for anything else when I learn. But now I’m done for good, I have nothing left to do but wait for the grade for my final thesis. In a few months I’ll officially be a psychologist. For you, that means I’ve got lots of time to write and my updates will come much faster from now on.
Chapter 4
"Remus, could you help me with something?" Harry asked.
"Sure, just tell me what I can do." Lupin answered.
"I would like to give Hermione something as a wedding gift, but I can hardly go to Hogsmead with red eyes. I've thought about something, I'm just not sure if it will work. Magical items keep their powers even if they are transformed into another form, right?"
"Yes, they usually do." Lupin agreed. Now he was really curious to hear what Harry was going to give Hermione.
Harry barely recognized the school ground. Hundreds of torches formed an aisle that let from the castle towards the sea. There were two short rows of chairs for the small group of people who would attend the ceremony. At the end of the rows was a beautiful arch which was decorated with red roses. The sunset that gave the sea a warm gold hue made the romantic atmosphere even more perfect.
Harry fumbled nervously with the tie he had borrowed from Neville. What would Hermione think when she saw the romantic setting? Harry wasn't convinced at all that Lupin was right and Hermione saw him as more than a friend. If she had no romantic feelings for him, the setting would make her feel really uncomfortable. Harry wondered who had arranged everything like this. Only a few people knew about the wedding and Harry couldn't imagine one of them doing this.
Harry looked around to see the small group that had gathered to watch the wedding. There were Lupin and Tonks, smiling encouragingly at him.
Next to them was Hagrid, he looked proud and touched. Harry had tried to explain to him that this wasn't a real wedding, but Hagrid had kept on telling him how happy he was to see him getting married and what a lovely couple he and Hermione made. Maybe he had prepared the school ground.
Harry saw Professor McGonagall on Hagrid's other side. She looked serious and a little worried. Finally someone who hasn't forgotten that this isn't a traditional wedding. Harry thought.
On the other side of the rose arch was Luna, who looked dreamy as always. Harry was truly amazed that even the end of the war and the information that he had a part of Voldemort inside him couldn't change Luna's serene expression.
Neville stood next to Luna and gave Harry a sympathetic smile. He probably thinks I'm in love with Ginny and don't want this. He has no idea that I'm so nervous because there's nothing I want more. I just doubt that Hermione feels the same way.
What had most surprised Harry were the people standing next to Neville and Luna. Fred, George, Molly and Arthur Weasley had decided to come to the wedding, even though Ron and Ginny had strictly refused. Molly and Arthur supported Harry's decision not to rush into a marriage with their only daughter, although they would like to see him with Ginny one day. They shared Harry's and Hermione's opinion that it would be really awkward for Harry and Ginny to be soulbound if their relationship didn't last. Nobody had the same worries about him and Hermione. Everybody was sure that their friendship would last come what may and that comforted Harry. He was obviously not the only person who couldn't imagine a world in which Hermione wasn't at his side.
Harry's thoughts were interrupted by Professor Arkana who asked him to step with her under the rose arch, because Hermione should be there any minute. Harry waited nervously for a few more minutes, looking back to the castle every few seconds.
When he finally turned around to see Hermione in the distance he couldn't take his eyes away from her anymore. Time seemed to stand still when she slowly came closer. Harry gasped when Hermione was finally close enough that he could see her clearly. He had never seen his best friend look so beautiful, not even at the Yule Ball three years ago. She was wearing a white dress, but it wasn't a traditional wedding dress but a flowing middle-age gown. It was a simple gown that highlighted her natural beauty. Hermione was wearing her hair down and softly curled. She had kept the make-up minimal, as far as Harry could see she was only wearing a soft pink lipgloss that made her beautiful lips appear a little fuller. She was perfect.
Hermione's eyes met Harry's and she smiled shyly. Harry returned her smile and that seemed to calm her. None of the two broke eye contact when Hermione was by his side and Professor Arkana had to clear her throat to bring them back to reality. Hermione blushed and that made it even harder for Harry to turn around and look at the Professor. Hermione looked so cute when she blushed.
When Professor Arkana was sure she had the attention of the main persons, she started her speech. "We have gathered here today to attend to the joining of two souls which are already joined in many ways. I don't know Harry well and I didn't have much time to see him together with Hermione, but what I've seen is enough to say that I haven't seen many people who are as close as you two. Hermione, you've always stood by Harry's side, even if it meant risking your own life. Harry, you've always done whatever you could to protect Hermione without thinking about your own safety. You've been friends for seven years now and nobody who knows you doubts that the friendship and loyalty you two share will last. That's why I'm comfortable performing this far-reaching ritual for you two. I'm asking both of you, do you want to bind your hearts and souls to each other for all eternity?"
"Yes." Harry and Hermione answered simultaneously.
Harry was a little surprised that neither he nor Hermione had hesitated a second to answer the question positively. Harry had been so nervous all day, but now that he was standing here with Hermione by his side, he felt calm. He knew that she would be by his side for all eternity and that thought made him feel safe.
"Then it's time for your vows." Professor Arkana said. "Hermione, please take Harry's hands and repeat after me: I, Hermione Jean Granger, am taking you, Harry James Potter, for my husband. I swear to love and honour you in this life and the next. I promise to be loyal and faithful to you forever and beyond. I give you my heart, my soul and my life to be joined with yours, from this day on for all eternity."
Hermione took Harry's hands and met his eyes again. When she said her vow she sounded so sincere and convinced that Harry had difficulties holding back the tears. He didn't doubt that she meant every word she said. But which kind of love was she talking about? Did she only mean the love she had for her long time best friend or was there something more?
When Hermione had finished, Professor Arkana looked at Harry, who was still holding Hermione's hands without even realizing it. "Harry, please repeat after me: I, Harry James Potter, am taking you, Hermione Jean Granger, for my wife. I swear to love and honour you in this life and the next. I promise to be loyal and faithful to you forever and beyond. I give you my heart, my soul and my life to be joined with yours, from this day on for all eternity."
Harry meant every word he said and he tried to tell Hermione with his eyes that he was as sincere as she had been. When Harry was halfway through his vow tears were streaming down Hermione's face, but she smiled brightly at him and gently pressed his hands, telling him that she had understood his nonverbal communication.
When Harry and Hermione had exchanged their vows, Professor Arkana reached for a small silver poniard. She took Harry’s right hand first and made a small cut in his palm. Harry was used to much worse pain, so he barely flinched. Afterwards, the professor took Hermione’s hand and cut her palm, too. Hermione winced slightly, but didn’t say anything. Professor Arkana then took their hands and pressed them together before she pointed her wand at their joined hands and murmured a spell. A band of something that looked like liquid gold formed at the end of the wand. The gold band split into two halves and Harry watched in awe when the two bands moved to their ring fingers to form two firm, gold wedding bands. “Harry Potter and Hermione Granger, I now pronounce you husband and wife.” Professor Arkana said and smiled at the young couple.
After Professor Arkana’s declaration, the guests stood up quickly, eager to get to Harry and Hermione. Hagrid was the first to approach his young friends. He pulled Harry into a firm hug that left him breathless. “Oh, Harry, I’m so happy for you. Look at you, all grown up and getting married. I’m so proud of you! Congrats, Hermione! It’s so great to see you two getting married!” Harry felt very awkward standing there and accepting Hagrid’s cheerful congratulations and it looked like Hermione felt as awkward as he did. Hagrid really did act as if this was a normal wedding. Harry wondered why his friend acted like that, but thought it was better not to ask.
The next person in the line was Tonks. She hugged Harry and Hermione tightly. “I wish you two all the best. Everything’s going to be alright.” She reassured them. After that she whispered something to Hermione that Harry didn’t understand, but whatever Tonks had said made Hermione blush.
Harry didn’t have time to dwell on wondering what Tonks had said to Hermione, because Lupin came up next to talk to him. “Congratulations. You made the right decision. You are very lucky to have each other.” Lupin said, leaving it open if he meant they were lucky to have such a good friend or more. “Thanks, Remus.” Harry answered. “I know how lucky I am.” Harry smiled at Hermione when he made the last remark and she returned his smile happily. “I’m the lucky one.”
Was all she said. Neville was the next one who shook Harry’s hand. He seemed a little awkward, obviously not knowing what was the right thing to say in a situation like this. “All the best.” He said simply when he shook his friends’ hands.
Luna on the other hand didn’t act awkward at all. She smiled brightly at her friends. “Congratulations you two! Have fun tonight.” Harry had no idea what to say to that. He was positive that his face was even redder than Hermione’s at the moment and that was saying something.
Harry was very grateful when the Weasleys saved him from having to find a reply to Luna’s words. The matching grins on Fred’s and George’s face indicated that they had heard Luna, but fortunately they didn’t say anything, probably just because their mother was standing next to them. “Harry, Hermione, I want you to know we will always be there for you. In my eyes you belong to the family, no matter what.” Molly Weasley said. “Thank you.” Harry said, truly grateful. “That means a lot to me.”
When everyone else had left, Professor McGonagall approached Harry and Hermione. “Mr. Potter, Miss Granger, I want to give you my best wishes, too. I agree with Professor Lupin that you’ve made the right decision. I am optimistic that everything will work out, but we have to take a few precautions to be on the safe side. You two will spend the night in one of Hogwarts’ guest quarters. I already instructed Dobby to prepare everything and bring a change of clothes for both of you to your room. Professor Lupin, Professor Arkana, Madame Pomfrey and I will spend the night in the adjourning room. I don’t think there will be much You Know Who can do without access to a wand, but we want to be on the safe side. If you need anything just call loudly and we can be with you in a minute. If we don’t hear anything unusual from your room during the night we will come in at 10 am to check on you.”
Harry didn’t know if he was relieved or appalled that three teachers were going to spend the night next to their room. On the one hand, Harry was happy that they could intervene if Voldemort managed to take him over and attacked Hermione. He would never be able to live with himself if Hermione got hurt. On the other hand, Harry was incredibly embarrassed that the teachers would be next door during his wedding night. What if they heard them? Or worse, if they heard them and interpreted whatever sounds they would make as alarm signs and came into their room while he and Hermione were .... busy. The thought of the wedding night was embarrassing enough without the possibility to be interrupted by the headmistress and his father’s friend.
Harry looked at Hermione, trying to see what she thought about the sleeping arrangements. She looked as uncomfortable as he felt, but of course her rational side won over and she agreed with McGonagall that this was the best solution. “Thank you, Professor. You’re right, we don’t really know what to expect and we shouldn’t be careless. We don’t know how Harry’s body will bear it when Voldemort’s soul is separated from his body. Maybe he’ll need medical help afterwards.” Hermione reasoned.
Harry didn’t know what to say to that. Hermione was worried for his health?! She was the one who was spending the night in a room with a guy who had a part of the most feared dark wizard in his body!
Professor McGonagall looked surprised, too. Harry assumed that she was more worried about Hermione’s physical health, too. McGonagall obviously didn’t want to remind Hermione of the dangers for herself though. “That’s possible, as far as we know Mr. Potters situation is unique in the Wizarding history, so we don’t know how this will affect him. You should not worry too much though. Professor Arkana and Madame Pomfrey are quite optimistic that everything will go fine. I already asked Dobby to show you your room for the night. He is waiting in the entrance hall and he seems very eager to help you. Have a good night, I will see you tomorrow.”
“Thanks Professor.” Harry and Hermione said in unison and made their way back to the castle where they were greeted by a very zealous Dobby.
“Master Harry and Mistress Hermione, Dobby is so happy for you. Are Master and Mistress hungry? Dobby has prepared Dinner for you. I hope Master and Mistress like the room Dobby has prepared for you.”
Harry was about to explain that he wasn’t really married to Hermione, but a look from Hermione stopped him. She obviously didn’t want to disappoint Dobby after he tried so hard to please them. “Thanks, Dobby, that was very nice. I’m sure Hermione and I will love everything.”
Dobby smiled brightly and led Harry and Hermione to a part of the castle where he had never been before. Harry couldn’t believe that Hogwarts still held surprises for him, he had always assumed he knew each hallway and secret passage by now.
“I’ve never been here before.” Harry told Hermione. “I didn’t know Hogwarts even had guest quarters.” Hermione rolled her eyes at Harry.
“Harry, of course Hogwarts has guest quarters. Don’t tell me you still haven’t read Hogwarts – a history!”
Harry chuckled. Of course Hermione knew about this. Was there anything she didn’t know? “No, I haven’t read Hogwarts – a history. I was a little busy with surviving.”
“Okay, I agree that’s a legitimate excuse. But really, you could have known Hogwarts had guest quarters anyways. Where did you think the Beaubateaux girls slept during the Triwizard Tournament?”
Harry shrugged. “I don’t know. In their carriage maybe? I really haven’t thought about that.” Hermione rolled her eyes again and Harry smiled. Hermione reprimanding him for not reading enough or for a lack of reasoning usually annoyed him, but today the normal banter calmed him. It was good to know that some things never changed.
“We’re there.” Dobby announced and opened a massive oak door. Harry’s eyes widened when he entered the room. It was a large and beautiful room. There was a fireplace with a comfortable looking couch and two armchairs in a soft cream colour. In front of a large window stood an oak table with two chairs and on the far end of the room was a massive king sized bed. Next to the bed was a door which probably led to the bathroom. The room was very nice, but that wasn’t what made Harry speechless.
Dobby had outdone himself with the decoration of the room. The room was lit with what had to be at least hundred candles and vases with dozens of red roses decorated every available surface in the room. The table was set for two, complete with crystal wine classes and silver cutlery. I guess that answers the question who set the torches and the rose arch up.
“Do you like the decorations?” Dobby asked hopefully. “It’s perfect, Dobby, thank you.” Hermione answered, trying to hide her embarrassment.
Dobby beamed at Hermione. “Thank you, Mistress Hermione, I’m so glad you like it. Your dinner will be ready in a minute. If you need anything else, just call.”
“Thank you, Dobby, I think we are good.” Harry answered. Dobby smiled at Harry and Hermione before he quickly left them alone. Harry had no idea what to do next and it seemed as if Hermione felt the same way, because they stood in awkward silence for a moment.
“Maybe we should sit down.” Hermione suggested finally. “Dobby said dinner would be ready soon.”
Harry nodded and took a seed. “Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’m actually pretty hungry.” Harry had completely forgotten that he hadn’t eaten since breakfast.
They didn’t have to wait long. A few minutes after Dobby had left several trays of food magically appeared on the table. Dobby had really prepared a feast, but Harry was too nervous to fully appreciate the good food. Harry and Hermione ate in silence, because neither of them really knew what to say in a situation like this.
When they were done and their trays and plates had magically disappeared, Harry finally gathered all his Gryffindor courage and looked Hermione in the eyes. “Hermione, I can never thank you enough for doing this for me. I don’t know what I would do without you.” Before Hermione had a chance to respond, Harry pulled a small box from his pocket. “I know this isn’t a real wedding, but I want to give you a wedding gift nevertheless. I want to give something to you to show you how much you mean to me and how thankful I am for everything you’ve done for me during all those years. I think I never really thanked you for everything you’ve been through because of me.”
Hermione interrupted Harry. “Harry, you don’t have to thank me. I’ve been there for you because I want to, because I couldn’t wish for a better friend. You don’t have to give me anything. Your friendship is more than enough.”
Harry smiled at Hermione’s words. “I know I don’t have to give you anything, but I want to. I wanted to buy something nice for you, but I couldn’t go to Hogsmead with Voldemort’s eyes and I think it would have looked strange if I went into the shops with sunglasses on a cloudy day. So I came up with a different idea. Do you remember the Pensieve I bought last year?” Harry asked and Hermione nodded. Harry had bought a Pensieve in Hogsmead short before they went searching for the Horcruxes, hoping that it would help him clear his mind.
“Well, I remembered Professor McGonagall saying that magical items keep their powers even if they are transformed. That gave me the idea for your present. Remus helped a little with the details. I know it’s just a small gesture, but I hope you like it.” Harry said and handed the box over to Hermione. She opened it and pulled a shimmering glass ball on a silver chain out.
“It’s my Pensieve.” Harry explained. “I removed the memories I put there and filled it with memories of you and me, from our first meeting to the day you agreed to the soul binding ceremony. I want you to see it as a thank you gift for seven years of friendship and hopefully many more years to come. It works like a usual Pensieve. You can view all memories and even add your own ones.”
Hermione looked up at Harry with tears in her eyes. “Thank you, Harry. That’s the most beautiful gift I’ve ever received. I will treasure it forever.”
Before Harry knew what was happening Hermione was half sitting on his lap, hugging him tightly. Harry reciprocated Hermione’s hug awkwardly. He had always felt a little uneasy when Hermione hugged him, because he wasn’t used to such demonstrations of affection. Today, Hermione’s hug made Harry feel a lot more uncomfortable, because it felt much too good. Harry was very aware of Hermione’s breasts pressing against his chest and her butt resting on his leg and he was starting to have thoughts about her that weren’t platonic at all.
Hermione smiled coyly at Harry. “You know that you have to loosen up a little, don’t you? It’s our wedding night, Harry, this won’t work if you tense up like that when I touch you.”
Harry blushed, but nodded. “You’re right, I know. I was just ... surprised.”
Hermione smiled and surprised Harry again by giving him a quick peck on the lips. “Come on, I’ll help you to relax.” Hermione offered and gently took Harry’s hand, leading him to the large bed.
Chapter 5
Harry sat down on the bed and Hermione took a seat next to him. “Would you like me to give you a massage?” Hermione asked gently.
Harry looked surprised. He didn’t expect the offer. “You don’t have to, really.” Harry protested, but he noticed that he didn’t sound as convincing as he wanted. Nobody had ever given him a massage and he really liked the thought of feeling Hermione’s soft hands on his back and shoulders.
“I know I don’t have to, but I want to.” Hermione said, referring to his words from earlier.
“Okay.” Harry agreed, smiling warmly.
Hermione laughed. “It would be easier if you took your jacket and shirt of, you know.”
Harry blushed again. He felt really stupid. “Of course. I’m sorry, I’m just a little nervous.” Harry explained while he took his jacket of.
“It’s all right. I’m a little nervous, too, but I trust you with my life and I know I can trust you with my body.” Hermione said.
“I trust you, too, more than I trust anyone else.” Harry assured, fumbling with his tie. Hermione smiled and helped Harry wordlessly to loosen the tie so he could take it off.
“Where did you learn this?” Harry asked. He had never worn a tie before and he would have never been able to bind it without Lupin’s help. Getting the thing off wasn’t as easy as it looked either, especially when your hands are shaking.
“I loved to bind my father’s tie when I was little. It made me feel important and grown up.” Hermione explained.
Sometimes Harry nearly forgot that Hermione had a normal family, a normal life waiting for her. She had spent so much time by his side fighting against Voldemort that Harry could barely imagine her doing something completely normal with her normal family. Harry felt incredibly guilty for taking that away from her.
Hermione distracted Harry from his thoughts by slowly unbuttoning his shirt. Harry’s heart started beating faster when he felt Hermione’s fingertips brush over his bare skin. When Hermione had finished unbuttoning his shirt she gently took it off and sat down behind Harry. He was now sitting between her legs and the intimate position made him blush again.
Hermione started gently kneading the tense muscles of Harry’s shoulders and it felt simply amazing. Harry immediately felt his muscles relax under Hermione’s gentle hands. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the wonderful sensations. He was very aware of her closeness; he felt the warmth radiating from her body and could feel her breath in his neck.
Harry realized that the welcome relaxation from Hermione’s massages was slowly turning into something different. Maybe Hermione had noticed the change in Harry’s breathing or the quickening of his heartbeat, because her touches slowly became bolder. The massage turned into tender caresses and after a few minutes Hermione began to place gentle kisses on Harry’s neck and shoulders. Harry couldn’t say if only a few minutes or hours had passed when Hermione stopped caressing him and turned around to face him.
Hermione smiled at Harry. “See, it isn’t so bad to let me touch you.”
Harry swallowed nervously. “No, not bad at all.” Was all he managed to say.
“Good.” Hermione answered and slowly leaned forward to kiss Harry.
He was sure his heart was beating faster than during his fight with Voldemort when he felt Hermione’s lips on his. This wasn’t a short peck like the kiss Hermione had given him earlier. Her lips were gently caressing him and Harry felt himself returning the kiss. It wasn’t Harry’s first kiss, he had kissed Ginny countless of times, but none of these kisses had felt nearly as good as the kiss he and Hermione were sharing.
Harry pulled Hermione in his arms and she returned his embrace eagerly. Encouraged by Hermione’s reaction, Harry started gently caressing her lips with his tongue, asking for entrance. Hermione’s lips parted slightly and Harry started to explore her mouth. When breathing was becoming an issue, Harry reluctantly ended the kiss. Hermione looked at Harry with surprise in her eyes, trying to catch her breath.
Hesitantly Harry reached out his hand and caressed Hermione’s cheek. Hermione leaned into his touch and smiled contently. Feeling encouraged by Hermione’s smile, Harry leaned forward and kissed Hermione again. The kiss started very tenderly, but soon grew more passionate. Harry pulled Hermione closer and she surprised him by sitting in his lap, straddling him.
Hermione’s gown was pushed away by the motion, revealing a good part of her legs. Without realizing what he was doing Harry shifted his hands, which were resting on Hermione’s hips, and started to caress her perfect legs. Hermione moaned softly and moved even closer.
Harry could feel Hermione’s groin pressing against his and that was his undoing. He felt himself harden and he was sure Hermione could feel his arousal. Hermione broke the kiss and grinned. Yes, she had definitely felt Harry’s physical reaction. The young woman slowly began to lift her gown. That brought Harry back to reality and he became suddenly aware of what they were about to do.
A thought crossed his mind that didn’t occur to him before. “Hermione, wait.” Harry stopped her by gently grabbing her hands. “What if you become pregnant?”
“Don’t worry, Harry. Madame Pomfrey performed an Anti-Pregnancy-Charm on me before the ceremony. The charm lasts three hours, so we have nearly two hours left before it wears off, but that might not be enough if you keep stopping me.” Hermione complained, rolling her eyes.
“I’m sorry; I don’t want to make this even more difficult for you. I just hate that you are obligated to sleep with me. I feel like I’m going to rape you.” Harry confessed.
Hermione looked shocked. “That’s the reason you are so reluctant?” Hermione asked and Harry nodded. “Oh, Harry, how can you think that? I am here because I want to. Nothing we have done and nothing we will do is against my wish.”
“I know you want to help me, but you would have never thought about doing something like this with me, if it weren’t necessary to save my life.” Harry argued.
Hermione blushed at that and looked down quickly, avoiding Harry’s eyes. Harry took her reaction as affirmation to his statement and although he had already suspected that Hermione didn’t return his feelings, the silent affirmation hurt him. She would probably close her eyes and think of Ron when he made love to her.
“See, that’s what I meant. You only want to do this, because you want to help me. How can you not feel violated?” Harry asked concerned.
Hermione’s face turned soft and she gently caressed Harry’s cheek. “Harry, I could never feel violated by you. You are my best friend and I love you. Stop thinking too much and try to enjoy this, okay?”
Hermione gave Harry a short and gentle kiss and then started to trace the muscles of his chest with her tender hands. Hermione followed her hands’ movements with her eyes, looking amazed. Harry wasn’t the skinny boy he had been when they first met anymore, but had become a handsome young man who had gained muscles in all the right places.
Harry’s breath quickened both due to Hermione’s gentle caresses and her obvious approval of his body. Harry had never been vain, but that Hermione of all girls found him attractive was an immense turn-on for him. Harry couldn’t help but moan when Hermione undid the zipper of his trousers and her hand brushed over his groin briefly.
“Will you let me take my gown off now?” Hermione asked, smiling coyly.
Harry didn’t trust his voice at the moment, so he just nodded. Hermione pulled her gown over her head and Harry gasped. She was wearing a crimson lace set of bra and panties. The material was so thin that it was nearly transparent and the bra was very low cut. Harry’s heart was racing and he had to remind himself to keep breathing. Within seconds he was harder than he had ever been before.
Hermione blushed when she saw Harry staring at her. “Do you like what you see?” The question was probably meant to sound seductive, but it came out a little insecure.
“You’re gorgeous.” Harry whispered. Hermione blushed at the compliment and beamed. She resumed her previous position on Harry’s lap and kissed him passionately. Hermione let her hands wander over Harry’s chest again, but didn’t stop there. Harry moaned when Hermione’s hand went further south and finally reached the bulge in his pants. Hermione started gentle stroking and kneading Harry’s erection through his boxers and he groaned in pleasure. What Hermione was doing to him felt heavenly.
She was doing so great that Harry suddenly wondered if she had done that before. When Ron had been with Lavender he had constantly bragged about their sexual adventures, but he had never spoken about Hermione in that way. Harry had no idea if they hadn’t gotten that far yet or if Ron simply held his tongue out of respect for Hermione. Harry didn’t know if he wanted to know which one was true.
Hermione seemed to sense Harry’s distraction, because she stopped stroking him. “What’s wrong?” she asked. Harry wasn’t sure if he imagined the frustration in her tone.
“Nothing.” Harry quickly lied. He definitely didn’t want to question Hermione about her sexual activities with Ron, so he kept his thoughts to himself.
Hermione still looked at him sceptically, so Harry decided to distract her with a kiss. She responded eagerly, but broke the kiss after a few seconds. Before Harry could ask if something was wrong, Hermione gave him a seductive smile and undid the clasp of her bra. When Hermione took her bra off all conscious thought left Harry’s brain and was replaced by nothing but desire.
Harry didn’t realize that he was openly staring at Hermione’s naked breasts until he heard her laugh silently. “You may touch me, too, not only look.”
Harry mumbled an apology and hesitantly touched Hermione’s breasts. He gently cupped her breasts and caressed the soft skin with his thumbs. When his fingers brushed over Hermione’s nipples she moaned softly. Harry was intrigued by her reaction and decided to experiment a little. He started caressing and rubbing Hermione’s nipples until they were hard and Hermione’s moaning increased. Hermione reached out her hand and started stroking Harry through his boxers again. The combined pleasure of Hermione’s hand on his crotch and her breasts in his hand soon become too much for Harry and he had to grab Hermione’s hand to stop her movements.
Hermione looked hurt and confused and Harry hurried to explain his actions. “I won’t last much longer if you keep doing this.” Harry explained blushing.
Hermione smiled proudly. “I obviously did it right then.”
Before Harry could respond Hermione’s hands were on the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down. A moment later Harry was completely naked. He looked up to see how Hermione would react to his state of undress and saw that she was staring at his penis with an amazed expression. Before Harry could say anything, Hermione took his fully erect penis in her hands, caressing him gently. Harry moaned loudly. The feeling of Hermione’s warm hands on his cock was beyond amazing.
“Hermione, you need to stop.” Harry gasped when he was about to come. Hermione complied and gave Harry a tender kiss before she lay down on her back and swiftly removed her panties. Harry was frozen for a moment, he was too fascinated by the sight of Hermione – completely naked and offering herself to him – to do anything but stare.
Hermione brought Harry out of his trance by taking his hands and gently pulling him down until he was lying next to her. Harry decided to explore Hermione’s body a little. He started gently caressing her breasts and stomach, but moved further south until his hand was between Hermione’s legs. He was surprised to feel how wet Hermione was. Harry remembered from Seamus’ and Dean’s late night talks that wet was good. It meant that Hermione was aroused. The realization that Hermione was turned on because of him made Harry even harder.
Encouraged, Harry started stroking gently. When he hid a certain spot Hermione gasped out loud. “Yes, Harry, right there.” Harry continued to play with the little nub he had found and was rewarded by moans and gasps from Hermione.
“Please, Harry.” Hermione moaned. Harry was confused. Was he doing something wrong?
“What, Hermione? What do you want?” Harry asked tenderly.
“You. I want you. Please, Harry, I’m ready. I need you.” Hermione gasped.
Harry positioned himself on top of Hermione and his eyes met hers. “Are you sure?”
Hermione nodded eagerly. “Yes, Harry, I’m sure.”
Harry gave Hermione a long, loving kiss before he pushed into her as gently as possible.
The moment their bodies connected Harry was met by an overload of sensations. He felt immense pleasure, a sharp pain, fear and rage, all at the same time.
Harry was so confused by the conflicting emotions that it took him a moment to notice that Hermione and he were surrounded by a circle of golden light and that a dangerous looking black smoke was coming out of his body.
Harry slowly started to understand. The golden circle could only mean that the bounding magic was starting to work and the black smoke was probably Voldemort’s soul leaving his body. The rage and fear he felt were Voldemort’s emotions; he was desperately trying to cling to Harry’s body.
Then Harry realized that the pain he had felt wasn’t his emotion either. The soul bounding was working and he was starting to feel Hermione’s emotions. The pain was hers, he had hurt Hermione!
Harry immediately forgot his pleasure, the strange circle of golden light and even the fact that Voldemort was having a rage attack inside his body. Hermione was the only thing that mattered. Her eyes were tightly shut and she was breathing heavily.
“Hermione, are you alright?” Harry asked concerned. Hermione opened her eyes and her facial expression quickly changed when she saw the smoke and the golden light. Harry could feel her surprise and concern, but he didn’t feel pain anymore. Hermione was obviously too distracted to be aware of the discomfort she had felt a moment ago.
Hermione watched the black smoke with a concerned expression and Harry followed her gaze. The smoke was surrounding his head as if it was glued there. Voldemort was obviously clinging to his body with all his energy.
“Harry, I think the bounding isn’t complete yet. It’s not strong enough to banish Voldemort’s spirit.” Hermione assumed.
“Do you think we did something wrong?” Harry asked confused. It was difficult for him to think clearly while he was inside of Hermione.
“I don’t think you can do this wrong, Harry.” Hermione answered in her lecture voice. “I think we just should keep going.” She suggested blushing.
“Are you sure? Are you really okay? I could feel your pain earlier.” Harry asked with concern.
“Don’t worry, Harry, I’m fine. You don’t feel pain now, do you?” Harry shook his head. All he felt was love, confusion, worry and pleasure and he was quite sure that these were his emotions. Maybe the bound wasn’t strong enough yet to sense Hermione’s emotions accurately.
Harry started moving, trying to keep his thrusts slow and steady to give Hermione time to get used to the feeling. Being inside her felt incredibly and it took all his willpower to keep a slow rhythm.
Harry could feel Hermione relax around him and after a few moments Hermione started to meet his strokes and clench her inner muscles around him experimentally. Harry groaned. He had never thought that anything could feel that good. It was getting harder and harder to keep himself from thrusting hard and fast like he wanted.
Hermione was breathing hard, but he couldn’t feel pain anymore. Harry started to try and move a little faster. The change in speed earned him a moan from Hermione and he could feel a rush of pleasure. Harry wasn’t sure if it was his own or Hermione’s pleasure he was feeling, all he knew was that it felt simply amazing.
Hermione was panting and moaning by now and after a particular powerful stroke her eyes fluttered shut again. Harry couldn’t control himself anymore, he was thrusting harder now, moaning loudly. The feeling of Hermione’s warmth around him, the sight of her flushed face and the sound of her moans were nearly too much and Harry knew he wouldn’t last much longer.
He was too lost in his ecstasy to notice that the golden light was getting brighter and that more and more of the black smoke was leaving his body. He was only aware of his and Hermione’s combined pleasure. Both their moans and gasps filled the room and after a few minutes Hermione started shaking and Harry could feel her inner muscles contract rhythmically around him as she cried out his name. That was his undoing. Harry moaned Hermione’s name as he came harder than ever before.
Harry collapsed on top of Hermione, spend from his amazing orgasm. He could feel Hermione stroking his hair and caressing his back as he came down from his high. Harry closed his eyes and enjoyed being held by Hermione.
He had no idea how long they had been in this position when he finally realized that he couldn’t feel Voldemort’s anger anymore, all he felt was love and tenderness. After what felt like forever Harry looked up and caressed Hermione’s cheek. He didn’t know what to say, so he just leaned forward and kissed Hermione lovingly.
When Harry broke the kiss and looked up Hermione gasped. “Harry, your eyes! They are green again!”
“Do you think he’s gone?” Harry asked hopeful, lying down on his side next to Hermione.
“It seems so. How do you feel?” Hermione asked in return.
“Amazing.” Harry answered without thinking.
Hermione rolled her eyes, but smiled. “That’s not what I meant, Harry. I meant: Can you still feel him?”
Harry thought about the question for a moment. He didn’t feel rage or fear, just satisfaction, relieve happiness and ... worry. The last thing confused him. He wasn’t worried. Then a thought crossed him. “No, I don’t think so. Hermione, are you worried?” Harry asked curiously.
“Of course I’m worried, Harry. All Professors said removing Voldemort’s soul from your body could kill you. The soul bounding thing was just a theory, a plausible one, but still
a theory, because this is a first time situation.”
Harry smiled at Hermione’s concern. He liked to know that she cared so much about him. “Don’t worry, I feel very much alive.”
“That’s not a topic to joke about, Harry.” Hermione reprimanded him.
Harry gave Hermione an apologetic look. “I know, I’m sorry. I’m really fine; you have nothing to worry about.”
Hermione smiled brightly. “It’s really over, isn’t it?”
Harry didn’t answer immediately. It took him a few moments to process Hermione’s words. It was over. Voldemort was gone for good. He could finally start to live without wondering if he would experience his next birthday. Harry suddenly realized that he had no idea what to do with this new freedom. He had never really thought about which job he wanted to take or where he wanted to live. All he had thought about was surviving. Harry suddenly felt lost.
“It’s okay, Harry.” Hermione whispered gently. “You will find your way.”
Harry gave Hermione a small smile. He realized that he liked the new connection between them. They had always been close, but now they understood each other even better without words. Hermione had senses his worries and immediately knew what was going through his head. The idea of someone always knowing how he felt would have disturbed him if it had been anyone but Hermione. With her, he liked it that he didn’t have to find the words to explain his feelings. He had never been good at talking about feelings, but now he realized that he wanted her to know how he felt.
“I just don’t know where to start. I never really thought about what I wanted from life.” Harry admitted.
“You have all the time in the world to figure that out.” Hermione reassured him.”And if you ever need someone to talk, I’ll be there.” She promised.
“Thanks. The same goes the other way around, you know.” Harry replied.
Hermione smiled. “Yes, I know.” She answered and kissed his cheek. Hermione then moved closer to Harry and cuddled against his chest. Harry wrapped his arms around Hermione and was surprised how natural it felt to hold her like that. He had thought it would feel awkward, but it didn’t. It felt like Hermione belonged in his arms. Harry pulled Hermione closer and gently kissed her forehead. He slowly drifted to sleep, feeling safer and more content than ever before.
Harry was woken up by bright sunlight illuminating the room. The first thing he noticed was that he had slept better than he had in a long time. The second thing he noticed was his prominent erection, certainly due to Hermione, who was still lying naked in his arms.
Harry’s and Hermione’s limbs had entangled during their sleep and Hermione’s thigh was now resting between his legs, pressing against his groin. Harry tried to free himself out of Hermione’s embrace without waking her, but the motion only caused more friction. Harry couldn’t help but moan at the sweet torture. The sound caused Hermione to stir and slowly open her eyes.
“Morning.” Hermione said sleepily. She stretched and accidently brushed over Harry’s erection again, causing another deep moan. Hermione blushed and looked surprised when she sensed Harry’s reaction.
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it.” Harry apologized sheepishly.
“It’s okay, Harry, it’s a natural reaction.” Hermione reassured him.
Harry still looked ashamed by his reaction and Hermione tried to calm him by leaning forward and stroking his cheek. “It’s really okay.” Hermione said again, sounding a little breathless.
Their faces were so near that Harry could feel her breath on his lips. Harry’s heart started beating faster and his lips involuntarily parted. Harry didn’t know who had made the first move, but a moment later their lips touched and Harry and Hermione shared a passionate kiss. Harry pulled Hermione closer and soon she was on top of him. Hermione’s groin was now pressing against Harry’s erection and he could feel how wet she was.
Harry couldn’t think straight, all he knew was that he wanted Hermione and she wanted him. “Hermione, I need you.” Harry moaned in between kisses.
“Then take me, Harry, please.” Hermione gasped.
That was all encouragement he needed. A moment later he was inside of Hermione. Hermione moaned loudly and instinctively put her legs around him. Harry leaned forward and gently kissed and nibbled Hermione’s neck as he moved inside of her. Harry closed his eyes and allowed himself to get lost in the amazing sensations he felt. He could feel Hermione’s pulse racing under his lips, he felt her warmth and tightness surrounding him and heard her delicious moans.
When Harry hit a certain spot, Hermione gasped his name and Harry could feel a rush of pleasure coming from Hermione. Feeling her pleasure only intensified his and it didn’t take long until he found himself nearing his peak. Harry desperately tried to hold his orgasm off until Hermione had reached her peak, too. He could feel that she was close.
“Oh god, yes Harry!” Hermione moaned and a second later he felt a wave of overwhelming pleasure when they both reached their peak simultaneously.
Harry and Hermione kept holding each other while they were both coming down from their high. Harry kissed Hermione’s neck and shoulders and Hermione stroked his hair.
A long while later, Hermione suddenly gasped. “Harry, look at the clock! It’s already quarter past nine. They will be there at ten, we have to get dressed.”
Half an hour later, Harry and Hermione were both showered and dressed and sat at the table they had eaten dinner at last night. The atmosphere between them was suddenly awkward, neither Harry nor Hermione knew what to say. Harry eventually broke the silence. “So, now we’ll go back to being best friends or what?”
“Is this what you want?” Hermione asked, not meeting his eyes.
“What do you want?” Harry asked carefully. He didn’t dare to reveal his feelings yet. He had felt love and affection from her, but he already knew that she loved him; they were best friends after all. He still didn’t know if Hermione had any romantic feelings for him.
There was a long pause, before Hermione answered. “I don’t know what I want and feel anymore. Last night and this morning was incredible.” Hermione admitted, blushing. “I felt things I never thought I’d feel for you and I don’t know what that means. Everybody thought I’d end up with Ron and I’ve thought that’s what I wanted, too. Now I’m not sure anymore, but I don’t want to hurt Ron even more then I already have. I know he acted like a jerk, but I still care for him and I don’t want to lose him.”
Harry nodded sadly. “I know. I don’t want to lose Ron either. I won’t stand in your way if it’s Ron you want.” Saying those words broke his heart, but they were true nevertheless. He would never stand in the way of Hermione’s happiness.
“And if it’s not Ron I want?” Hermione whispered.
Harry looked up hopefully. Don’t get your hopes up, she hasn’t chosen yet. Harry warned himself. “Then we’ll have some trouble with Ron and Ginny, but if Ron loves you as much as I do, he will want you to make the decision that makes you happy.” There, he’d said it. Harry caught his breath, waiting for Hermione’s reaction to his declaration of love.
“You love me?” Hermione asked. Harry felt a confusing mix of emotions – hope, worry, joy, confusion, love – but he was too overwhelmed to figure out which emotions where his and which were Hermione’s.
Before Harry or Hermione could say anything else they heard a knock on the door. A quick glance at the clock told Harry that it was straight ten. Damn Professor McGonagall and her obsession with punctuality.
“Come in.” Hermione called, sounding as reluctant as Harry was. A moment later McGonagall, Lupin, Madame Pomfrey and Professor Arkana entered the room.
Lupin smiled. “I see you’ve got your eyes back.” He observed.
“Yes, I’m pretty sure I’ve got my body to my own again.” Harry answered.
“You don’t feel his presence anymore?” McGonagall inquired.
Harry shook his head. “No, I feel like myself again.”
Madame Pomfrey approached Harry, holding her wand. “This spell will detect any signs of Dark Magic.” She explained and muttered a spell. A moment later a white circle appeared around his body, but disappeared a second later.
“Very good, no signs of Dark magic. You’re right; Voldemort’s soul has left your body. How do you feel? Any pain, dizziness, fatigue?” Madame Pomfrey asked.
Harry blushed. He did feel a little exhausted, but he was pretty sure that this was due to his activities with Hermione. “No, I’m fine.”
Madame Pomfrey nodded and turned her attention to Hermione. “What about you? Is everything alright?”
Hermione blushed just like Harry had before. “I’m alright.” Madame Pomfrey performed the same spell on Hermione just to be sure that Voldemort’s soul hadn’t moved to her body and nodded satisfied when she got the same result.
When the examination was over Professor McGonagall gave Harry and Hermione one of her rare smiles. “I’m glad that our worries were unnecessary.” She said and handed Harry and Hermione their wands back. “You two better get back to your dorms and finish packing. The carriages will arrive after lunch. All the best, I’ll see you in two months for your NEWTs.”
The four adults were about to leave when they heard another knock on the door. Harry gave Lupin a questioning look. “We’re not expecting anybody.” He said, but called for the person on the door to enter.
When the door opened Harry was surprised to see Ron standing in the doorway, looking rather sheepish. “Hi... How are you doing?” Ron asked, directing the question at both Harry and Hermione.
“I’m not possessed by Voldemort anymore, that’s an improvement.” Harry answered, avoiding Ron’s eyes. Harry wished he could look at Ron and simply see his best friend, but right now what he saw was a rival for Hermione’s love. The way Ron avoided looking directly at Harry and his brief glance to the bed told Harry that Ron felt the same way. He couldn’t look at Harry without seeing the guy who had slept with the girl Ron loved.
Lupin cleared his throat to get the teenagers’ attention. “I think we better leave the three of you alone, we were about to leave anyway.” He said and a minute later Harry, Ron and Hermione were alone in the room. After a moment of awkward silence Hermione conjured a third chair and suggested to sit down and talk.
“So, are you okay, too?” Ron asked Hermione.
Hermione nodded. “I’m fine, thanks for asking.”
“Listen, I kind of came here to apologize. I didn’t mean the things I said. I was just jealous. The thought of you two... It just hurt, you know? But, I’m glad you’re okay, Harry and I don’t want to lose either of you.” Ron explained.
“I understand, Ron, I don’t to lose you either. We’ve been through too much together to let this destroy our friendship.” Harry said.
“I’m glad you came here, I was so afraid you’d never want to talk to us again.” Hermione admitted.
“So, what about us?” Ron asked Hermione.
Hermione was silent for a moment and when she spoke, she chose her words very carefully. “I’m not sure, Ron. I know you want me to say we can just start where we left off, but to be sure, I don’t even know what this would mean. We kissed and went out a few times, but we never really talked about our relationship and our future. I love you, Ron, but I don’t think I’m in love with you.”
“It’s Harry, isn’t it?” Ron asked angrily.
“No, Ron, it isn’t Harry. It’s you and me and that we are better off as friends than lovers. Be honest: Can you actually imagine living with me or having children with me? We would constantly argue. You would leave your stuff all over the house and I would scold you for not doing any housework. You would feed the children chocolate for dinner and you would call me a spoilsport for insisting on healthy meals. We’d never work out, Ron.” Hermione reasoned.
Ron looked disappointed, but not angry. “We probably really wouldn’t, would we?” Ron agreed after a moment of silence. “I’ve never thought as far, but now that you brought that up, I really can’t see myself being married to you. You’re just... you’re the most important girl in my life besides Ginny. I can’t imagine loving another girl as much as I love you, so I probably thought it would be natural for you to be my girlfriend.” Ron explained.
Hermione nodded in understanding. “Yes, I understand how you thought. We’ve always been friends and during all the summers I spend with your family it almost felt like they were my second family. I probably always thought that someday, we all would be one happy family, with me married to you and Harry married to Ginny. That won’t happen though.”
“No, it won’t.” Ron agreed a little sad. “But that doesn’t mean you two aren’t welcome at the Burrow anymore. Mom still sees you like her own children and Fred and George love to have you around and Ginny.... well, she’ll get over it. She’s had a crush on Harry till she was ten, but now it’s probably the time for all of us to grow up.”
Harry was really surprised at Ron’s unusually mature words. He had obviously underestimated his friend. Harry was relieved that he had his friend back and that jealousy wouldn’t be a problem between them anymore. He just whished he would get a chance to talk to Hermione in private to finish the talk that had been interrupted earlier. Unfortunately, there wasn’t time anymore. It was already past eleven, lunch was in an hour and he and Hermione still had to finish packing and find Hedwig and Crookshanks before.
Two hours later the three friends had found a compartment and were talking about their plans for the future while the Hogwarts express brought them home.
“I’ll only stop by at our house to drop my things off and then I’ll apparate to Australia and try and find my parents. I’ll have to give them their memory back, explain everything and bring them home before I can start planning my future. I have to fix the mess this caused before I can move on and make important decisions, you understand?” Hermione was talking to both their friends, but the last words were directed at Harry.
Harry nodded. “Yes, I understand that. I’ll be there for you need any help.” Harry was willing to give Hermione as much time to think as she needed. At least she was thinking about a possible future with him and that was more than he had dreamed of 24 hours ago.
A/N: So, here’s chapter six with the twist I announced in some review replies. I know the cliffhanger is mean, but I promise I’ll explain everything in the next chapter. Maybe some of you can guess what has happened. Whoever gets it right gets a kiss from either Harry or Hermione (depending on your gender and orientation ;) ).
Thanks a lot to my beta Maria (Marla1) for her help with this chapter. You’re great!
Chapter 6
Hermione looked at her watch when she arrived at her parents’ house. It was nearly 9 pm, which meant it was early morning in Australia. Her parents probably were not at the small house she had rented for them before she left for the Horcrux search. The false memory she had given her parents before leaving told them they were tourists who wanted to get away from their busy lives and enjoy the nature of Australia. Her parents had always been early raisers, which meant that they had probably already left the house. Hermione decided to apparate to their house nevertheless. So she could find out if they already lived there or if they had moved on to another place. Hermione really hoped they hadn’t, Australia was very big and if they had decided to travel the country it would be very hard to find them.
Hermione quickly packed a backpack with a few clothes. She left Crookshanks with Harry and the neighbours were looking after the house, so there wasn’t anything else to be organized. Before she left, she grabbed the canteen containing the potion she’d made a stock of before they left to search for the Horcruxes. Hermione took a sip and packed the canteen. She probably wouldn’t need it, but better to be safe than sorry.
Hermione apparated to the secluded forest near the house and walked the rest of the way. She knocked on the front door to see if her parents were still home or if somebody else was living here by now. When nobody answered she unlocked the door with her wand and looked around. Hermione was relieved to see her parents’ suitcases in the bedroom. That meant they were, obviously, still living here and wouldn’t be gone for a long time. She could simply wait for them.
Hermione sat down on the couch and let her thoughts wander and it didn’t take long until they landed on a certain raven haired wizard. Harry had been wrong with his assumption that she had never thought about kissing him or making love to him. When he had talked to her and Ron about his first kiss with Cho she couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel to kiss Harry. Then last summer, when she had been one of the people who had transformed into fake Harrys by using Polyjuice potion, she had been more than curious about her best friend’s body and had secretly been happy for the opportunity to see the parts of Harry’s body she had never seen before. Hermione had been so frustrated when she found out that Harry’s eyesight was so bad that she couldn’t see anything clearly. She had silently cursed Moody for not giving her glasses before she was fully closed. Hermione hadn’t seen as much as she wanted, but it had been enough to send her imagination into overdrive. Hermione had been able to tell how muscular and well endowed Harry was, leading to several weeks of heated dreams. Hermione had tried to banish these thoughts from her head, because Harry was her best friend and she wasn’t supposed to feel about him like that, but the thought how it would be to be with Harry never completely left.
Hermione’s thoughts drifted to her wedding night. With Ron, she had never gone further than kissing. Hermione knew that Ron had wanted to go further, but he never pushed her and Hermione had been thankful for that. For some reason she had never felt comfortable about going further with Ron. Surprisingly, she did not feel at all uncomfortable sleeping with Harry. She had been a little nervous because of the strange circumstances of their wedding night, but she’d never felt the urge to stop. Sleeping with Harry had felt so right, not only physically, but emotionally, as well. Although the sex had been better than Hermione had imagined possible, that hadn’t been the best part of the night. The best part had been holding Harry afterwards. He had looked so happy and peaceful, Hermione loved the knowledge she had been the cause of his bliss. She felt so much love and tenderness during these precious moments. Was it possible to feel so much love for somebody without being in love with him? Hermione seriously doubted that.
She took the necklace off Harry had given her and pulled her wand out. Hermione spent the next hours watching memories of her and Harry. She had expected that Harry had put the important events they had experienced together into the necklace, but was surprised to find out how vividly Harry remembered the small moments that meant so much to her. Hermione watched her first meeting with Harry and saw him and Ron defend her from the Troll. She watched herself through Harry’s eyes when she was petrified in first year and when she ran towards Harry during the feast after being revived. Hermione smiled at the memory. Harry had looked so happy to see her. Hermione decided to put her memory of Harry’s face that day in the Pensieve, too before continuing to watch Harry’s memories. She saw herself and Harry flying on Buckbeak’s back and watched the training with Harry for the Triwizard Tournament and watched how she was hugging him before he had to face the dragon. Hermione saw herself through Harry’s eyes when he first saw her at the Yule Ball. She watched herself being hit by Dolohov’s curse during the battle at the ministry and heart the panic in Harry’s voice when he saw her fall. She watched how she told Harry that she wouldn’t let him go to search for the Horcruxes by himself. Harry hadn’t put only the memories of those big moments in the Pensieve though. He had archived his memories of each hug and each kiss on the cheek he had received from her. Hermione found the memories of every single time Harry had awoken in the Hospital wing to find her sitting by his side and saw Harry open every single present she had gotten him in the seven years they had been friends.
When Hermione had watched all the memories tears were streaming down her face. She had never known how much all the small signs of affection from her had meant to Harry. Hermione realized that she remembered all these small moments as vividly as Harry. Like he, she was able to recall what Harry had gotten her for each birthday and Christmas and she remembered every hug they had shared. She remembered every time her heart had beaten faster because of a particular dangerous Quidditch manoeuvre. She remembered every time she had wanted to scold Harry for breaking rules or neglecting his school work, but hadn’t because Harry had given her one of his disarming boyish grins. Each time Ron tried the same tactic he had been given a lecture, but she had never been half as strict with Harry, because she didn’t have the heart to make his smile disappear.
There was no doubt: She was in love with Harry. She was head over heels in love with him and had been for a long time, she had just been delusional. Hermione looked at her left hand and smiled when she inspected her wedding band and the thin mark where she had been cut with the poniard during the ceremony. Hermione started to realize the full meaning of what had happened yesterday. Her’s and Harry’s lives had been linked for all eternity and nothing could ever undo this bound. Instead of scaring her this realization made Hermione feel safe and secure. The ceremony had only manifested a connection that had been there for a long time.
Hermione took her wand out once more and added two more memories to the Pensieve: her wedding and her wedding night. She wanted to cherish these memories forever and never forget even the smallest detail.
Hermione hadn’t realized how much time had passed and was startled when she heard a key in the door. She hastily took her wedding band of and put it in her jean pocket. She had enough to tell her parents without informing them that she was magically married to a guy they barely knew. She would save that for another talk.
When Harry arrived at Grimmauld Place he didn’t really know what to do. Ron had invited him to the burrow, but it was Sunday, what he meant that Fred and George would be home and Harry wasn’t in the mood to hear innuendos about his wedding night. He wasn’t keen on seeing Ginny either, so he had declined Ron’s offer. He wasn’t in the mood to sit alone in the big house either, so Harry decided to pay Gringotts a visit. The Wizarding bank had sent him a letter on his 17th birthday, asking him to come and claim his inheritance, but Harry had been too busy with Voldemort and the Horcruxes. Going to Gringotts would give him something to do and maybe he could stop by at Florish and Blotts and see if they had any books on renovating spells. During the train ride Harry had decided to stay at Grimmauld Place, at least for a while. He simply couldn’t sell the house which Sirius had grown up in. It was the last connection he had to his godfather and it would be unfair towards Kreacher to sell his home to strangers. It had taken Kreacher some time to accept him, but now he considered Harry his new master. Harry didn’t like to be treated like that by Kreacher, but he knew that the old house elf needed someone to care for. It was all he had ever done and depriving him of the opportunity would make him feel useless.
Harry quickly unpacked his trunk and apparated to Diagon Alley. He tried to ignore the stares and whispers of all the people he saw on his way to Gringotts. The news that he had defeated Voldemort had of course already reached everybody in the Wizarding world what meant he was attracting even more attention than usual. Harry was starting to regret that he had left the house. When Harry arrived at Gringotts he found the next Goblin.
“Hi, my name is Harry Potter and I came because of my inheritance. I couldn’t make it sooner.” The heads of everybody in hearing distance turned when Harry introduced himself, but he ignored the people staring at him. The goblin asked Harry to follow him and let him to a small office. “Mr. Potter, you are the sole heir of the Potter fortune and the main heir of the Black fortune. Miss Tonks and Mr. Lupin have already received their share of Mr. Black’s inheritance, so all what’s left in both vaults belongs to you. I only need you to sign a few documents before I’ll give you the keys.”
The goblin handed Harry a document and his eyes went wide when he read the amount on the parchment. “Is there a problem, Mr. Potter?” the goblin asked formally.
When Harry had found his voice back he asked “All this money belongs to me?”
The goblin looked surprised. “Of course, sir. You are James Potters only son and your father didn’t have any siblings and as Mr. Black’s godson you are his main heir.”
“Yes, I know. I just... I had no idea how rich my parents and Sirius were.” Harry still couldn’t take his eyes from the piece of parchment in front of him. His parents had left him nearly 9 million Galleons and Sirius more than 7 million. Harry couldn’t believe that he suddenly had more money than he could spend in a lifetime. When Harry was over the initial shock he noticed another line on the document. “There’s mentioned something about ‘personal belongings’ of my parents. What kind of belongings?” Harry asked. He was ecstatic about another possible link to the parents he had nearly no memory of.
“Mainly family jewellery, as far as I know. You can have the key now and look for yourself if you want to.” The goblin offered and Harry nodded eagerly. When Harry entered his parents’ vault he was amazed by all the galleons there, but what really caught his eye was a corner in the room where he saw a trunk.
When Harry opened the trunk, the first thing that caught his eye was a Wizarding painting of him and his parents. The painting must have been produced only a few months before their deaths. “Mum, Dad?” Harry asked the two adults who were smiling at him.
“Oh, Harry, you look so grown up.” His mother said affectionately.
“Hallo, Harry.” His father greeted him with a smile.
“It’s so great to see you!” Harry answered, overwhelmed by the possibility to talk to his parents. “I had no idea that this painting existed.”
“We ordered it shortly after your first birthday. The war was escalating and we wanted you to have a memory of us if we didn’t survive. Considering that you’re here today obviously means that this is what happened, isn’t it?” James asked.
“You died three months after this portrait was made, on Halloween. I’m so sorry.” Harry answered sadly.
“It’s alright, Harry. We knew that this could happen and we were ready to go. I’m just sad that we had to leave you alone so young.” Lily answered.
“... and that this probably ruined Halloween for you.” James added with a half smile. “It was always my favourite Holiday. It’s a great opportunity to have a party and on Halloween you are less likely to get in trouble for a prank. Even the teachers cut you some slack on Halloween.” James explained, earning him a strict look from his wife.
Harry smiled. His parents were exactly how he had imagined them from Sirius’ and Lupin’s stories. “It’s true, I always think of you on Halloween, but I have many good memories to connect with Halloween, too. My first Halloween in Hogwarts was the day I became friends with the most amazing girl in the world and that’s one of my favourite memories.”
“The most amazing girl in the world? Tell us about her, I want to know everything.” Lily demanded.
Harry told his parents about Hermione. How they had become friends, how loyal she had been during all those years, how kind, courageous and brilliant she was. Eventually, Harry told them about the final fight and the aftermath, including the wedding and soul bounding. “I love her more than anything and I know she loves me, but I don’t know if she loves me as a friend or more.” Harry concluded.
“After what you just told us, Hermione probably doesn’t know that herself. Give her time, she’ll come and talk to you when she is ready.” Lily advised.
“Yes, but you know son it can’t hurt to use the infamous Potter charm to help her make the right decision.” James said.
“If the Potter charm is so infamous, why did it take you three years to get me to accept a date with you?” Harry’s mother asked her husband.
“You did agree, didn’t you? And after three more years, you became my wife, so I must have done something right.” James countered.
Lily rolled her eyes. “Your father is awfully sure of himself. Though a little bit of his self-esteem would do you good. You’re a great young man Harry and this girl is very lucky.”
“Thanks, Mom.” Harry answered. “Hermione said something similar to me.”
“See, she loves you. She just needs a little time to figure that out.” James reassured Harry.
“We have something for you to give to Hermione whenever she is ready for it. Look into my jewellery box. There must be a small red box in it.” Lily told her son.
Harry opened the elegant mahogany chest and soon found what he was looking for. When he opened the small velvet box Harry saw the most beautiful diamond ring he had ever seen. It was a perfect and quite large round diamond with two smaller rubies on either side. The ring was beautifully carved and looked old.
“It’s the engagement ring I gave your mother; it has been in the family for four generations. I always wanted you to give it to the woman you love.” James explained.
Harry thanked his parents and placed the ring in his pocket. He wanted Hermione to have it, no matter what her decision would be. He couldn’t imagine giving his mother’s ring to any other woman. After that, Harry shrunk the painting and carefully put it in his pocket, too. Then he filled his purse with galleons and got some of them changed into Muggle money before he left Gringotts.
Harry’s next stop was Florish and Blotts. He had soon found a good book on renovating spells and was about to pay and leave when he remembered that his library could use some add on. Most of the books there were about Dark Arts and Quidditch and he wanted to have a good collection of books Hermione would like. If she decided to move in with him he wanted her to have a library she would love and even if she decided to just stay friends he still wanted her to feel at home in his house. Harry ended up buying every book of which he thought Hermione might like it, from the newest edition of “Hogwarts – a history” over several books on Wizarding history, elves, charms, potions, runes and arithmancy to a huge selection of Wizarding novels. The surprised employee packed all his purchases in huge box and charmed it to be feather light before shrinking it to fit into Harry’s pocket. Harry decided to visit another bookstore in Muggle London before heading home, where he bought Shakespeare’s collected works along with several other classics, some books about cats and another bunch of novels.
When Harry arrived home, he decided to put the renovating book to good use. Kreacher had kept the house perfectly clean and even told Harry how to remove the elf heads on the walls. As a reward Harry had allowed Kreacher to keep Mrs. Blacks portrait in his room, if he knew how to remove it. Kreacher knew, of course and both he and Harry were very happy with the new place for the portrait.
The house still appeared a little dull and Harry hoped that some fresh colours would make it more inviting. Harry decided to start with the library. The room looked rather dark with the heavy oak shelves on three sides of the room, so Harry decided on a friendly, pale yellow for the walls. After that, Harry charmed the dull brown coaches and armchairs and dull grey curtains and carpets in a warm purple tone. Harry put his new books away with a flick of his wand and hung the portrait of his parents above the fireplace before he moved on to the living room.
He decided to decorate the living room in the style of the Gryffindor common room, where he had always felt at home, with the walls, cushions and curtains in an inviting scarlet tone.
He chose a bright yellow for the kitchen, where he would probably take most of his meals. There was a table for six people and he would rarely have more than five guests. There were two more rooms in the basement, a big dining room and a formal salon, intended for dinner parties. Harry doubted he would ever need those rooms, so he simply painted them in a neutral white.
On the second floor were three bedrooms, a bathroom and two offices. The bedrooms were the ones he, Ron and Hermione had used during their stay at Grimmauld Place last year and Harry decided to leave it like that. He wanted Ron and Hermione to always have a room in his house. Harry of course wished that Hermione would share his room, but he wanted her to know that there would always be a place in his house for her, no matter what she decided.
Harry painted his room in Gryffindor red. He didn’t have to think long about Ron’s room, he painted it in a bright orange, the colour of Ron’s favourite Quidditch team. Hermione’s room was more difficult. He knew her favourite colour was midnight blue, but that would make the room appear too dark, especially with the dark furniture. Harry eventually decided on a soft peach colour.
Harry painted both offices in a bright yellow tone, deciding that someone who had a job that required them to continue working on evenings and weekends would need some cheering up. On the third floor were five more bedrooms and a second bathroom. Harry decided to leave the rooms of Sirius, Regulus and Mrs. Black like they were and painted the remaining guestrooms in cream and beige.
The house looked a lot better after Harry was done with painting, but the walls still looked a little bleak. Maybe he should get some of his photos framed to give the house a more personal note. Harry had just started to go through his selection of photos, when he felt a rush of fear out of a sudden and the cut from the poniard started to burn. Hermione! Harry thought immediately. Hermione was in trouble!
Harry’s first impulse was to just apparate to the address in Australia Hermione had given him, but he knew that he better didn’t go there on his own. If Hermione was being attacked by a large group he should get as many people as possible. Harry quickly apparated to the Weasleys. He knew Ron, Ginny, the twins and Mrs. Weasley would probably be at home on a Sunday afternoon.
Harry quickly apparated to the Burrow and found the five Weasleys together in the living room. “Hermione, she’s in trouble, we have to help her!” Harry screamed frantically.
“What happened?!” Ron asked. He looked nearly as panicked as Harry felt.
“I don’t know, but she’s afraid! We have to help her now!” Harry yelled impatiently.
“Ginny, floo your father, he’ll get the rest of the order. The rest of us are coming with you, Harry. You know the address?” Mrs Weasley asked. Harry quickly gave them the address of the house in Australia Hermione had given him and a second later Harry and the four Weasleys arrived in Australia.
Hermione had just finished the most difficult talk she had ever had with her parents, after giving them their memory back. The Grangers had been shocked to learn that their own daughter had hexed them and sent them to another country. They had been even more aghast when Hermione told them about all the dangers she and her friends had faced during the previous year. Hermione’s parents were still trying to progress the fact that they had lost a year of their lives while her daughter had nearly been killed several times, when the door of the small house suddenly burst and at least seven people in black robes and with wands in their hands entered.
“Run to the backdoor!” Hermione screamed at her parents.
She knew her parents wouldn’t have a chance to escape if the death eaters were really interested in them, but she also knew that she was more important to them. There were too many, Hermione knew she didn’t have a chance against them, but maybe she could distract them long enough that her parents could escape. Hermione destroyed all lamps in the room and closed the blinds with a flick of her wand, turning the room in nearly complete darkness. She knew the death eaters could simply cast as Lumos, but that wouldn’t illuminate the whole room and the time they would need to spot her could give her parents the crucial few seconds they needed.
Two of the death eaters reacted quicker than their mates; a second after Hermione had destroyed the lamps two rays of light illuminated the room, giving away the positions of the wizards behind them. Hermione managed to knock the first one out with a shock charm and aimed at the second. He sent a shock charm in her direction, but Hermione quickly responded with a shielding charm and knocked him out, too. Now all other death eaters had used the lumos spell, too and the room was brightly lit by six rays of light. Hermione knew she didn’t have a chance against such a superior number, but she wouldn’t give up without a fight. Hermione noticed that her parents had managed to escape and that none of the death eaters went after them. They wanted her.
All the remaining death eaters aimed their wands at her at the same time and one of them hit her with another shock charm. The next thing Hermione knew was that she was woken up and two of the death eaters held her arms and legs. A third one, who she recognized as Mulciber, kneeled above her, holding a small vial. “We know how stubborn you are, mudblood, that’s why we didn’t expect you to willingly tell us where your friend Potter is. I’m sure a few hours of torture would lose your tongue, but I’m not a patient man, so we have to delay the torturing and killing you part. I think that’s even better; this way Potter can watch us having our fun with you before we kill him for what he did to our Master. You see, there are many arguments for making this short, that’s why we organized some Veritas serum.”
One of the bystanders forced Hermione’s mouth open and the one who had spoken to her emptied the vial’s content in her mouth. Thank god I took the potion I made before I came here was Hermione’s last coherent thought before everything went fuzzy.
Where am I? Who are these men? They look like death eaters, the followers of Lord Voldemort, but what could they possibly want from me? I am just a student after all. Hermione wondered.
“Where is Harry Potter?” one of the black clothed men asked her. Hermione was confused. She didn’t know a person named Harry Potter.
“Who is Harry Potter?” Hermione asked.
The man who had asked her looked confused and angry. “What does this mean, Yaxley? I thought this potion always works!”
“I have no idea why it isn’t working! I swear I did everything right!” the man called Yaxley justified himself.
“You obviously didn’t! All right, than we have to try good old torture.” The man who had asked her about this Harry Potter answered and pointed his wand at her. Hermione knew what was about to come: the Cruciatus curse. It was supposed to hurt very badly. Why didn’t these men believe her that she had no idea who this Harry Potter was?
Before the man could start to torture her the door burst open and five people she didn’t know entered the room. The four men who looked like they were about her age and a middle aged woman burst into the room, pointing their wands at the death eaters.
“Let go of her!” the black haired man ordered. He sounded very angry.
“Potter, how nice of you to spare us the trouble of finding you.” The unknown man who had spoken with Yaxley said.
The young man who seemed to be Harry Potter raised his wand and nearly hit the death eater with a stunning spell, but he managed to shield himself. Meanwhile his friends were fighting with the other death eaters. Hermione quickly searched for her wand and found it laying a few inches away from her. She didn’t know who these people were, but they were obviously enemies of the people who had just tried to torture her, so Hermione assumed they were on her side.
Hermione quickly stunned the death eater who was fighting with the man who had to be Harry Potter. Potter used the opportunity to stun the death eater who was fighting with one of the red haired men. Potter, Hermione and the young redhead quickly stunned the men who were fighting with the woman and the red haired twins and so the fight was over within a few minutes.
“Hermione, are you all right?” Harry Potter asked and ran over to her. He sounded very worried.
“I’m alright, but how do you know my name? And why were those men after you? They asked me about you, they seemed to think I know you.” Hermione explained, but Harry Potter looked at her as if she had grown a second head.
“Hermione, don’t you recognize me? It’s me, Harry!” the young man said, sounding desperate.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t remember you.” Hermione said, now thoroughly confused.
“Oh no! Harry, I think I know what happened.” The red-haired man who was not one of the twins, said.
Chapter 7
Harry looked from Hermione to Ron, waiting for an explanation. Why did Ron know what was going on here while he had no clue why Hermione didn’t recognize them anymore?
“The day before we left to search for the Horcruxes, Hermione took me aside and gave me a few bottles of a potion she’d make. She said she and I should keep drinking the potion regularly in case the death eaters caught her or me and used Veritas serum to question us about your plans and whereabouts. Hermione invented the potion herself. The potion alone has no effect, but when it is taken together with Veritas serum it makes the person who drinks it instantly forget everything which is associated with a certain person. You have to put a hair or something else of the person you want to forget in the potion, like with Polyjuice potion,” Ron explained.
“But why can’t Hermione remember you and your family? And why didn’t you tell me about the potion?” Harry asked. He was still confused and now a little angry that his friends’ had kept something like that from him.
“Think about it, Harry. How many memories of my family and me can Hermione possibly have which aren’t connected with you? The only times when Hermione and I were together without you were the Hogsmead visits in third year and the first weeks of the summer before our fifth year. In Hogsmead we talked about you and bought you sweets and during the summer you were the main conversation topic of everybody in the house. And about your other question: Hermione didn’t want to cause you even more worries than you already had,” Ron answered.
Harry decided not to argue with Ron because he didn’t tell him about the potion, but asked the question that was most important to him. “How long does it take for the potion to stop working? You said you had to take it several times, so it loses his effect eventually, right?”
Ron looked very uncomfortable. “I hope so. The potion eventually leaves your system when it doesn’t react with Veritas serum. Considering that this potion is a new creation nobody knows how long it takes to lose its effect when it is taken with Veritas serum. Hermione said she tested the potion on herself with a hair of Fleur’s mother and she still didn’t recognize her on a photo when we tried it a few weeks ago. Hermione said it’s likely that we would eventually remember you though, because you’re more important to us, but we can’t be sure,” Ron admitted worriedly.
“You mean I took a potion that might cause permanent memory loss?! But why? How could I have been so stupid? Why would anybody want to capture me and question me about Harry Potter? What are Horcruxes and who are you?” Hermione asked Ron, clearly upset.
Before Ron could think of a way to give Hermione a brief summary of the last seven years, the door burst open for the third time and Arthur and Ginny Weasley, Lupin, Tonks and Kingsley Shacklebolt entered the room with raised wands.
“I see we are late for all the fun. Too bad, that means all we have to do is gift wrap those guys and bring them back to Azkaban,” Tonks said, lowering her wand.
“Professor Lupin!” Hermione exclaimed, thankful for the first familiar face in the room. “What
are you doing here?”
“You recognize Remus?” Harry asked, confused. “That doesn’t make sense, I was nearly always there when you met him.”
“You were?” Now it was Hermione’s turn to be confused. “Does that mean you are a Hogwarts student, too?”
“What’s going on here?” Lupin asked Harry.
“Apparently, one of the death eaters gave Hermione Veritas serum, but Hermione had taken a new potion she invented that makes the person who drinks it forget everything connected with a certain person when it reacts with Veritas serum. Hermione wanted to make sure she couldn’t tell a death eater where I am under Veritas serum. Now she doesn’t remember anybody here besides you,” Harry explained.
Lupin was quiet for a moment, looking like he was deeply in thought. “Hermione, what’s the last thing you remember about me?”
“You were my Defence against the Dark Arts teacher in third year, but you had to leave
because...”
“It’s alright, Hermione, everybody here knows that I’m a werewolf,” Lupin reassured her.
Lupin directed his attention to Harry. “Hermione obviously only remembers me as her teacher and has forgotten everything about me that is connected with you. During classes Hermione always paid close attention to the teacher, that you and Ron sat next to her during the lessons isn’t an important part of these memories, that’s probably why she remembers me at all.”
“Where are Mr. and Mrs. Granger?” Mrs. Weasley suddenly asked.
“My parents are here?” Hermione asked, even more confused. “But why? Are they alright? Where are we anyways?”
“Mr. And Mrs. Weasley, could you please go and look for the Grangers? They know you and they know they can trust you. If they are hiding somewhere here they will come out if they hear you. I’ll try to explain everything to Hermione,” Harry suggested.
“Yes, that’s a good idea, dear. Don’t worry, Hermione, I’m sure your parents are fine,” Molly said and left the house with Arthur.
“We should sit down, this is going to be a long story,” Harry said. He sat down on the couch with Hermione to his right, while Ron took the seat on her other side, Ginny took the armchair and everybody else got chairs from the dining table.
“Maybe I should start with introducing everybody?” Harry suggested and Hermione nodded.
“You’ve already figured out that I’m Harry Potter. The young man on your other side is Ron Weasley. We are in your year at Hogwarts and we’re both Gryffindors, too. The three of us have been best friends since first year. The girl in the armchair is Ron’s sister Ginny. She’s a year younger than we and in Gryffindor, too. The twins are Ron’s and Ginny’s brothers Fred and George. The couple who is looking for your parents at the moment are their parents. The young woman with the bright pink hair is Nymphadora Tonks. Just call her Tonks or she might hex you. Tonks is an Auror and Lupin’s wife. They got married a year ago and have a baby boy. The black man is Kingsley Shacklebolt, he is an Auror, too. Tonks, Kingsley, Lupin and Arthur and Molly Weasley are all members of the Order of the Phoenix. That’s a secret defence organisation against Voldemort. Do you remember Voldemort?” Harry asked.
“Of course, I’ve read many books in which he was mentioned. He is the most dangerous dark wizard. He and his followers tortured and killed many Muggles,” Hermione answered.
“That’s all you remember about Voldemort?” Harry asked and Hermione nodded.
“Voldemort was a very mighty dark wizard during the time we were born. Everybody feared him, but there were a few brave people who founded the Order of the Phoenix to defend him. Professor Lupin was a member of the order back then and so were my parents. They fought him and his followers, but no one ever managed to beat him. A few months before I was born, Professor Trelawney, who became the divination teacher at Hogwarts, had a vision and made a prophecy. This prophecy said that the person who would be able to kill Voldemort would be born at the end of July and that he would be the offspring of a couple who had fought Voldemort three times. The prophecy also said that Voldemort himself would mark this person as an equal. There were only two couples who had fought Voldemort three times and survived – my parents and Frank and Alice Longbottom, the parents of Neville Longbottom. Neville was born on July 30th and I was born on July 31th. Voldemort heard of the prophecy and decided to find and kill both babies. Voldemort found the place where my parents were hiding with me and killed my mum and dad. He tried to kill me too, but he couldn’t. I knows now that I was protected, because my mother died to save me. Her sacrifice made it impossible for Voldemort to kill me. When he used the killing curse on me it fired back and Voldemort nearly died. That was the day he “marked me as an equal” as the prophecy says. He survived because of several dark rituals he performed on himself, but he was less than a ghost. I later learned that Voldemort had created magical objects which contained parts of his soul – the Horcruxes. I had to find and destroy them before I had a chance of killing him. You and Ron accompanied me on my journey to find the horcruxes and you fought with me two days ago during the final fight with Voldemort at Hogwarts. I killed Voldemort and we managed to kill or catch several death eaters, but some escaped and are now looking for revenge. That’s why they came here. We are in Australia by the way. You sent your parents here to protect them before we left for the Horcrux search and you came here to bring them home now that Voldemort is gone,” Harry explained.
“My parents were here during the fight?” Hermione asked, alarmed. “What if they are hurt?”
“I’m sure they are fine, Hermione. If the death eaters had caught them, we would have found their... their bodies already. That they aren’t here can only mean they found a safe place to hide,” Harry reassured her.
As if on cue, the door opened and Arthur and Molly came in with the Grangers.
“Hermione dear, are you alright?!” Mrs. Granger asked, worriedly.
“I’m not hurt, but obviously I’ve taken a potion that made me forget Harry and everybody who’s
connected with him,” Hermione explained.
“You erased your memory, too?” Mr. Granger asked.
“Too?” Hermione asked.
“You made your parents forget about you with a spell to protect them,” Harry explained.
“Can’t you just give Hermione he memory back, like she did with us?” Mrs. Granger asked.
“Unfortunately, it isn’t that easy. Hermione made sure that the dark wizards wouldn’t be able to restore her memory. Hermione didn’t want to be able to tell one of our enemies where I am. We don’t know how long it will take for her memory to come back,” Harry explained, not daring to add ‘or if it will come back’. He couldn’t bear the thought of being a stranger to Hermione forever.
“You mean Hermione might never remember you and Ron again? But you’ve always been so close!” Mrs. Granger exclaimed.
“There must be something we can do.” Lupin said. “I suggest we bring Hermione to Madame Pomfrey, she might know what to do. Do you remember our school nurse, Hermione?”
Hermione nodded. “I went to her a few times when I had a headache or something.”
Harry smiled. “You actually saw her very often, but usually it was to visit me when I nearly got myself killed again. And when you were in the hospital wing, it was usually because of me.” Harry’s smile disappeared when he said the last sentence.
“It seems like you have a talent for getting into trouble,” Hermione noticed.
“You always accused me of searching for trouble, but that’s not true, well, not entirely true at least. Trouble often finds me, even if I didn’t search for it,” Harry answered.
“Ron, Harry, I think you should accompany Hermione and her parents to Hogwarts. Fred, please take Ginny home, she hasn’t passed her apparition test yet. The rest of us will bring the death eaters to Azkaban and question them,” Arthur Weasley suggested.
Fred complained a little about being placed on babysitting duty, but complied after a stern look from his mother. A few minutes later only Harry, Ron and the Grangers were left.
“I think we best apparate to Hogsmead and walk from there. The fireplace isn’t connected to the floo network and I don’t think Mr. And Mrs. Granger would like to fly and we don’t have brooms anyways,” Harry suggested.
“Hogsmead, the Wizarding village? I’ve read about it and always wanted to go there,” Hermione said happily.
“Hermione, you’ve been there countless of times,” Ron reminded her.
“Ron, Hermione can’t remember that. She has always been with at least one of us when she went there. We can do a little sightseeing in Hogsmead when we come back, if your parents don’t mind,” Harry promised.
“That’s a good idea.” Mr. Granger agreed. “Seeing familiar places might help Hermione remember.”
“Apparating is a strange feeling for the first few times, but don’t worry, we’ll take care of you,” Harry reassured the Grangers. “Ron, can you take Mr. And Mrs. Granger? I’ll take Hermione since she doesn’t know where we’re going,” Harry decided and Ron nodded.
Harry gently took Hermione’s hand and was surprised how much this small touch affected him. A minute later they had reached their destination and Harry reluctantly let go of Hermione’s hand.
“Are you alright?” Hermione asked her parents who looked slightly shaken by their first apparition experience.
“Do wizards always travel that way?” Mrs. Granger asked instead of an answer.
“No, not always, it’s just the most comfortable way,” Hermione explained. “Flooing, using a Portkey or flying on a broom are other possibilities.”
“This is the most comfortable wizarding way of travelling?” Mr. Granger asked incredulous.
“Many wizards think so,” Harry explained. “I prefer flying, but that takes too long for long distances.”
“... and it’s awfully dangerous,” Hermione added.
“You keep telling me that before every Quidditch match,” Harry said and gave Hermione a warm smile. He often complained about Hermione’s over-protectiveness, but truth to be told, he liked it that Hermione cared so much about him.
“You play Quidditch?” Hermione asked. “Wasn’t it enough that some dark wizard out there wanted to kill you? Do you really need to find more ways kill yourself?”
Ron laughed. “It’s good to know that you’re still the same old Hermione, even without your memory.”
During their walk through Hogsmead Hermione looked in awe at the village and Harry and Ron pointed the different locations out to her and her parents.
“There’s Honeydukes. They have the best sweets. There’s a secret passage from Honeydukes to Hogwarts, but we better don’t take it. The students and sales clerks would probably look odd at us if we go straight to the cellar,” Ron explained.
“And how do you know about this passage?” Hermione asked.
Ron grinned. “Fred and George are the biggest pranksters the school has seen in twenty years. They know all secret passages in and around Hogwarts.”
A few minutes later the group had reached Hogwarts. The entrance door of the castle had been repaired, but inside they could still see the signs of the fight that had taken place.
Harry sensed Hermione’s affright before he even looked at her face. He quickly turned around and laid a hand on her shoulder.
“Hermione, are you all right? Do you remember anything?" Harry asked carefully.
“I’m not sure. I see flashes of people running and people in dark cloaks shouting curse, but it’s all very blurry,” Hermione answered, trying to make sense of the fragments of her memory.
“That’s good!” Ron exclaimed excited and Harry gave him a disapproving look. “I mean, of course what you remember is bad, but it’s good that you start remembering things,” Ron corrected himself sheepishly.
“Are you okay?” Harry asked Hermione again.
Hermione gave Harry a reassuring smile. “I’m fine, don’t worry.”
“That must have been a huge fight, the school looks terrible!” Mrs. Granger sounded horrified at the thought of her daughter and their fiends participating in a life or death battle.
“Are your other friends all right?” Hermione asked Harry, who looked sad at the question.
“None of our friends got hurt severely, but two students didn’t make it,” Harry answered. He didn’t mean to scare Hermione, but he wouldn’t lie to her. She deserved the truth.
“Did we know them?” Hermione asked.
Harry nodded. “Both of them were Gryffindor’s, they were in Ginny’s year. One of the was a member of the DA, a defence organisation of students we founded, and the other one was a prefect, so you knew him better than I did.”
“It must be so hard on their families,” Mrs. Granger said and took her daughter’s hand, like she wanted to convince herself that she was really still alive.
Harry led the group to the hospital wing, where they found Madame Pomfrey in her office. The people who had been injured during the battle had either been sent home with the other students or transferred to St. Mungo, so Harry, Ron and the Grangers were alone with the Medi witch.
“Mr. Potter, Miss Granger, Mr. Weasley, I thought you had left with the other students. Is there a problem I overlooked when I examined you this morning?” Madame Pomfrey asked Harry. She looked worried and Hermione didn’t miss the expression in her eyes.
“You were here this morning? Were you injured during the battle?” Hermione asked and the Medi witch looked confused.
“I’m fine, Hermione, don’t worry,” Harry reassured Hermione before he directed his attention towards Madame Pomfrey.
“Like you see, we’re not here because of me,” Harry said and he and Ron explained what had happened.
“How often do I have to tell you kids not to experiment with potions?” Madame Pomfrey said after they had finished their story. “Does anybody of you know which ingredients Miss Granger used for her potion? I can’t do anything if I don’t know anything about the ingredients this potion consists of.”
“Yes, I know the ingredients. Hermione made me learn them by heart when she first told me about the potion,” Ron said and told Madame Pomfrey the ingredients of the potion.
Madame Pomfrey’s eyes widened. “Miss Granger, do you have any idea how dangerous this mixture is when it reacts with Veritas serum?”
Hermione had turned pale when she heard Ron list the ingredients.
“These ingredients would cause an overstimulation of the neurons in the brain when it is combined
with certain ingredients of the Veritas serum. It would cause some kind of short-circuit in the
brain. This might cause permanent brain damage!”
“I’ll have to examine you thoroughly and then we can try some spells and potions that usually help with memory loss, but I honestly doubt that will help in your case. I’ll do what I can though,” Madame Pomfrey said and let Hermione to one of the beds. Her parents, Ron and Harry followed them, but when they were all standing around the bed while Madame Pomfrey gathered several bottles of potions, Harry sensed how uncomfortable Hermione felt being the centre of all attention. She must feel like an animal in the circus. Harry thought.
“Maybe we should go and wait outside,” Harry suggested. “That will give Madame Pomfrey more peace to work.”
Hermione gave Harry a grateful smile before she directed her attention to her parents. “He is right, you can’t do anything right now anyways. Why don’t you go and drink a cup of coffee?”
“Are you sure?” Mrs. Granger asked and Hermione nodded.
Madame Pomfrey offered Hermione’s friends and parents to wait in her office, where Mr. and Mrs. Granger sat down.
“I’ll go and get us some coffee. Or would you prefer a cup of tea?” Harry asked.
“Coffee is fine, thanks,” Mr. Granger said and Mrs. Granger nodded.
“I’ll come with you,” said Ron. “You know to help you carry the cups.”
“To help me carry the cups?” Harry asked amused, as soon as they were out of hearing distance. “I’m sure even Hermione’s parents know that I could just levitate the plate.”
“That was the only excuse I could come up with so fast,” Ron justified himself. “So, didn’t you forget to mention a little something to Hermione? That you two are married and magically bound to each other for example?”
Harry sighed. “I didn’t want to confuse her further. Hermione has enough to deal with without knowing that she is married to somebody she doesn’t remember.”
“But you’re not simply married, you’re soul-bound! Don’t you think Hermione will notice that you can read each other’s thoughts?” Ron asked.
“I can’t read her thoughts, Ron. I sense her emotions. And yes, she will eventually notice something is odd, but not right away. Sometimes I don’t even know if it’s my own emotion I feel or Hermione’s, so I think it’s the same for her. When we feel similar things she probably won’t notice anything. When I know how she feels without asking she will probably think it’s just because I know her so well and when Hermione senses my emotions she will probably find a rational explanation for that and think that she just interpreted my facial expression or something,” Harry reasoned.
“So you want to lie to Hermione?” Ron asked.
“No, I won’t lie. I just don’t confront her with the whole truth at once. There’s still something we have to confess to Hermione anyway and she won’t take it well,” Harry said and Ron looked confused. “The NEWTs, Ron! They are in two months and Hermione doesn’t know about that. She doesn’t remember the battle, so she can’t remember that the NEWTs were delayed because of that.”
“Oh no, I hadn’t thought about that. She’ll freak out, mate,” Ron sounded slightly panicked.
“So, when are you going to tell Hermione about the NEWTs?” Ron asked when they were on their way back with coffees for Ron and the Grangers and tea for Harry and Hermione.
“When became the ‘we’ an ‘I’?” Harry asked his friend.
“Who’s her husband?” Ron asked back.
“That doesn’t mean I have to take all of Hermione’s anger for being the bearer of the bad news,” Harry argued and Ron laughed.
“I can’t believe it. The boy who lived, defeater of You-know-you and saviour of the wizarding world is afraid of his best friend and wife.”
“Hermione can be a lot scarier than Voldemort when she is stressed or angry,” Harry defended himself.
When Harry and Ron came back with the coffee, Madame Pomfrey had already finished Hermione’s examination and the Grangers were standing next to Hermione’s bed.
“Were you able to do anything for Hermione?” Harry asked the Medi witch.
“Unfortunately not,” Madame Pomfrey answered. “I’m afraid there’s nothing we can do but wait for Miss Granger’s brain to recover. You should show her as many familiar things as possible and tell her stories of your time together, that might help her to regain her memory. I’m sorry, but I can’t do anything at the moment.”
Harry placed a comforting hand on Hermione’s shoulder. He wasn’t sure if the fear and sadness he
felt were her emotions or his, but Hermione’s facial expression told him that the news had
discouraged her.
“Don’t give up, Hermione. It’s not possible that your memory of Ron and me has been permanently
erased. We’ve been too close for that. There must be some traces of memories in your head and we
will find them. It’s not possible to forget someone who is so important to you.” Harry tried to
reassure her, hoping she wouldn’t be able to see through his lie. He thought about Neville’s
parents who didn’t recognize their own son anymore. Harry knew it was possible to permanently
forget the people closest to you, but he didn’t want Hermione to know that. There was still
hope.
“We’ve brought you some tea; it’s your favourite. Peppermint with two pieces of saccharine and no milk,” Harry explained and handed her the cup. “When we’ve finished our tea or coffee we can show you Hogsmead, that might stir some memories.”
Hermione smiled sadly at Harry. “Thanks, Harry. We’ve really been very close friends, haven’t we?”
“We still are and we’ll always be very close friends,” Harry promised sincerely.
Half an hour later the group was back in Hogsmead. Hermione was impressed by the large post office and obviously liked Honeydukes a lot, but restrained herself from buying too many sweets because she knew her parents wouldn’t approve.
Harry was happy about Hermione’s enthusiasm about the town, but he couldn’t really enjoy the trip. Where ever they went people stared at Harry and he was even asked for an autograph two times. Harry hated the attention. He wished he could simply spend the day with his friends, paying Hermione all the attention she deserved without being bothered by nosey fans.
“You really hate being the hero for all these people, don’t you?”
Hermione asked when they left Honeydukes. “You look so annoyed that I could swear I can feel your
frustration.”
Harry sighed. “I’m not a hero, Hermione. I was lucky, that’s all. The fight could have easily ended with my death. There was a time when the papers portrait me as some crazy kid searching for attention, because nobody wanted to believe that Voldemort was back. The people believed every word they wrote about me and hated me. Now everybody thinks I’m some kind of superhuman hero and worship the ground I walk on. Their behaviour is the exact opposite, but to me it doesn’t make much of a difference. They still treat me like someone I’m not and nobody is interested in getting to know the real me,” Harry explained.
Hermione looked very sad. “And now even one of your best friends doesn’t know you anymore. I’m so sorry, Harry.”
“There’s no reason to apologize, Hermione. You did all this for me. You sacrificed so much to keep me safe and I’ll never be able to thank you enough for everything you did for me. It’s true, you don’t remember everything you knew about me anymore, but you still understand me. Most people assume I love being the hero of the wizarding world, but it only took you a few hours to understand that I hate it. You have always understood me, sometimes even better than I understood myself,” Harry reassured Hermione.
Hermione took Harry’s hand, wordlessly thanking him for his friendly words. Harry gratefully accepted Hermione’s hand and didn’t let go of her until they reached the Three Broomsticks, where they had dinner.
When they were eating their deserts Harry approached a topic he had been thinking about for the
last few hours.
“Hermione, Ron, I think you should stay with me at Grimmauld Place for a while. We don’t know how
many death eaters are still out there and we probably won’t hear from the order before next
morning; they will be busy with their captures for a while. There are already many protective
spells around Grimmaulds Place and we could use a spell to prevent apparition on it, too. You would
be much safer there than at your homes.”
“I don’t know Harry. Maybe it’s better if Hermione stays at home with us after everything she’s been through.” Hermione’s mother said.
“You are more than welcome to stay with us as well. Feel free to stay as long as you want,” Harry offered.
“Are you sure?” Mr. Granger asked. “Is there even enough room in your house?”
“Don’t worry, there’s plenty of room,” Harry reassured the Grangers. After some minutes of debating, Mr. and Mrs. Granger agreed that reopening their practice could wait another week or two and decided to take Harry up on his offer.
Harry, Ron and the Grangers apparated to Grimmauld Place and Harry quickly placed anti apparition wards around the house before giving his guests a tour.
Hermione gasped when they reached the library. “Wow, Harry, the library is amazing! Are you the bookworm or were all the books already here?”
“Sorry to disappoint you, but I’m not really a bookworm. I read novels occasionally, but it’s not my favourite hobby. Many of the books were already here when I inherited the house from my godfather, but I bought new ones, too. I thought you might like to have something to read when you come for a visit,” Harry explained.
“You extended your library for me?” Hermione asked amazed and Harry nodded.
“I want my friends to feel at home at my house and I hope you guys will visit me often. The house is far too big for one person anyways,” Harry explained, before leading his guests to the guest rooms.
“I redecorated your rooms from last summer, too. I hope you like them,” Harry explained to Ron and Hermione.
“Wow, Harry, the room is awesome!” Ron exclaimed when he saw his bedroom. “All that’s missing are a few Chudley Cannons posters to make it perfect.”
“The room is great, Harry, thanks,” Hermione said sincerely when they reached her room. “I love the design.”
Harry led the Grangers to the third room and told them they could simply choose one of the remaining guest rooms. When everybody had settled in, Harry went back to the living room and reopened the album with the photos of him, Ron and Hermione which was still lying on the coach table. Harry spent a long time looking at pictures of him and Hermione and playing with his wedding band. He had taken the wedding band off while Madame Pomfrey had examined Hermione who had thankfully been too confused to notice the wedding band until then. When Harry was finally tired enough to sleep despite his worry for Hermione, he went to his bedroom and placed the album and wedding band in the top drawer of his bedside table before he lay down and soon fell into a fitful sleep.
Chapter 8
Harry woke up early the next morning, although he hadn’t slept much. He knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, so he got up, quickly washed and got dressed, before he went downstairs. He met Kreacher, who was holding a pile of freshly washed clothes, on his way to the kitchen.
“Good morning, Master. Do you want Kreacher to make breakfast for you and your guests?” the elf asked politely. Harry was still amazed how much Kreacher had changed during the last year.
“Good morning, Kreacher. No, thanks. Everybody else is still asleep and I’m not hungry yet. I’ll just make myself a cup of tea. What do you have there?” Harry asked, when he noticed something glittering on the pile of clothes.
“It’s a ring, Master Harry. It fell out of Miss Hermione’s pocket and Kreacher was going to give it back to her,” Kreacher answered.
Harry took a closer look at the ring and recognized it as Hermione’s wedding band. She had probably taken it off before she talked to her parents.
“Don’t bother, Kreacher,” Harry said a little too rash, but Kreacher didn’t seem to notice. “I’ll give it back to her,” Harry offered and took the ring from Kreacher.
Harry wondered if he had made the right decision. He hated keeping secrets from Hermione and he knew she would get mad when she remembered everything. If she remembered. Harry wondered what he should do if Hermione never remembered. Would he tell her the truth eventually? Harry knew she deserved to know the truth. It was her life and her memories and it wasn’t right of him to take that away from her. But what if she never remembered and he and Hermione would build a friendship again? Only a friendship. How would she react if he told her that they had been more than friends in the past? Wouldn’t that make everything worse for her?
Harry decided that he would at least wait until the NEWTS were over before he considered telling Hermione everything. The memory loss and the exams would be more than enough stress for her.
Two hours later Harry, Ron and the Grangers were having breakfast when they heard a knock on the door.
“That’s probably someone from the order,” Harry said and opened the door.
“Hello, Harry. I see you have put an anti apparition spell on the house,” Lupin noticed as soon as he and Tonks entered. “That’s a good idea, you can’t be too careful.”
“Does this mean there is a reason to worry? Have the death eaters told you anything?” Harry asked, leading his visitors to the kitchen.
“We gave them Veritaserum, so they were very talkative,” Tonks explained. “They know of five more death eaters who didn’t die at the Battle of Hogwarts. They don’t know exactly where they are now, but gave us the addresses of all hiding places they know of. I’m optimistic that we will find them soon.”
Harry knew Tonks intended to make this sound like good news, but Harry wasn’t as optimistic. “That means that there are five more people out there who might want to take revenge.”
Lupin seemed pleased that Harry wasn’t taking the news lightly. “That’s what I said. We will protect everybody who might be in danger. I already spoke to the teachers; they will stay at the school during summer holiday. I think only the students who are close to you and might know where you live are in danger. The Weasleys are safe. They are five, six if Ron moves back in. Mr. Weasley can apparate to work and the others will go in groups if they have to leave the house. I already wrote to Luna Lovegood and Neville Longbottom and suggested that they spend the summer in one of or save houses together with Luna’s father and Neville’s grandmother.”
“That sounds good. What about you two and Kingsley?” Harry asked. “Where will you stay at night?”
“We haven’t made a plan yet, but I think the three of us should stay together. We already brought Teddy to my parents,” Tonks explained.
“Why don’t you stay here?” Harry offered. “There’s enough room.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Tonks asked and looked from Harry to Ron and the Grangers.
“Of course not,” Harry reassured her. “You’re always welcome. I like Kingsley and I’ve always considered you two family.”
“It would be nice to have somebody here whom I actually remember, Professor,” Hermione told Lupin.
“Call me Remus, Hermione,” Lupin told her with a smile. “I haven’t been your professor for a while.”
“Alright, prof...., Remus.”
“It’ll be like home,” Ron joked. “A house with less than less than six occupants is nearly empty to me.”
“Mr. and Mrs, Granger, is this alright with you too?” Lupin asked politely.
“Of course, it’s nice to get to know some of Hermione’s friends,” Mrs. Granger answered.
Her husband nodded. “It’s very nice of Harry to let us stay here, of course we don’t mind more guests. But does this mean we can’t leave the house until the death eaters are captured? We wanted to re-open our practice soon, we’ve already lost a year.”
“I’m sure we’ll find a solution for that problem,” Lupin answered. “We could connect your practice to the floo network and one of us can accompany you to work.”
A few minutes later Lupin and Tonks left to finish their reports and tell Kingsley about the new living arrangements. Kingsley showed up two hours later to bring his bag and accompany the Grangers to their practice, where they could arrange everything for the re-opening.
“Is your practice in your house?” Harry asked the Grangers before they left.
“Yes, why?” Mrs. Granger asked surprised.
“I just thought you could bring Hermione’s school books if you are at the house anyways,” Harry answered and Hermione looked surprised.
“School books? But haven’t we graduated already? Which date is it?”Hermione asked anxiously.
Harry looked as anxious as Hermione as he answered her question. “It’s May,11th. We would have had our exams in three weeks, but the OWLs and NEWTs were delayed because of the battle.”
“Delayed? When is the new date?” Hermione asked.
Harry hesitated and Hermione gave him a death glare. “Harry Potter, when are the NEWTs?!” Hermione asked in a dangerously low voice.
“July, 14th,” Harry answered reluctantly, mentally preparing himself for Hermione’s outburst.
“I’ll go and get some tea,” Ron said and fled the room as if Aragog was after him.
“July, 14th?!” Hermione asked appalled. “That’s in eight weeks, Harry! Eight weeks! How can I learn everything I need for the NEWTs in only eight weeks?!”
“Hermione, calm down. You already know more than most people know when they actually take the NEWTs. You did a lot of research on spells and potions before we left to search for the Horcruxes, you probably know many things which aren’t even exam relevant in Defence against Dark Arts, Charms and Potions. You’ll do great, as always,” Harry reassured her.
“I might know things that aren’t exam relevant, but what about the things that are exam relevant but were not relevant for the Horcrux search or the fight? And what about History of Magic, Herbology, Care of Magical Creatures, Astronomy, Arithmancy and Ancient Runes? I’ll fail!” Hermione panicked.
“Hermione, it’s more likely that Draco Malfoy declares his undying love for Ginny Weasley than that you fail in any class. You’re the brightest girl I’ve ever known and I’m sure you’ll graduate as the best of our class,” Harry said.
“But not with only eight weeks to study! I can’t wait until my parents bring my books, I have to start learning now!” Hermione said frantically. “And who is Draco Malfoy?”
Harry smiled. “You can borrow my books, we have many classes together. And Draco Malfoy is the biggest ass from school. He hates the Weasleys nearly as much as he hates me.”
Hermione frowned. “Your books? Don’t you want to study?” Hermione asked disapprovingly.
“I think I can wait until tomorrow,” Harry answered. When he saw Hermione’s face he quickly added. “Or I can start with a different subject.”
Harry quickly went and got all his school books while Hermione went to the kitchen to find Ron. When Harry came back with the books, he heard the voices of his two best friends.
“Hermione, we still have two whole months before the exams. I know you don’t remember that, but we’ve just won the war against You Know Who. I think I’ve earned a few days of rest before I start learning for the damned NEWTs.”
“You can rest when the NEWTs are over! Ron, don’t you realize that your whole future depends on the results of the ‘damned NEWTs’?!”
Harry sighed. He knew he would hear this kind of discussion every day for the following two months.
He was right. The following days passed in a dull routine of learning and trying to help Hermione remember. Harry wasn’t surprised that Hermione approached both tasks in a very similar matter. She had made repetition plans for the NEWTs and had set fixed study times. She learned every day from 9 am to 1 pm, took a half hour break to eat and continued learning till 8 pm. Harry would rather spend the time trying to help Hermione remember her past, but Hermione argued that it wouldn’t help her if she remembered her past but destroyed her future by neglecting her studies and getting bad grades.
At 8 pm, when Hermione was done studying, she sat together with Ron and Harry, watched old pictures and listened to their stories about their life together. Hermione asked them to be as detailed as possible when they talked about their past experience and she took notes while she listened to them.
“We drugged school mates and stole potion ingredients from a professor?” Hermione asked, seriously shocked. Harry and Ron laughed.
“I guess we had a bad influence on you,” Ron said.
“Nothing we told you sounds familiar?” Harry asked disappointed.
Hermione shook her head. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise,” Harry said gently. “It’s not your fault. Maybe we’re just trying it the wrong way.”
“What do you mean?” Hermione asked.
“When we just tell you about our past it must sound like a story you read in a book, nothing you would associate with yourself. Maybe we need something more visual. You remembered something when we were at Hogwarts, when you saw the scene of the Battle, right?” Harry asked.
“Yes, I mean I think I did. I only saw some pictures, like a scene in fast motion,” Hermione explained.
A scene in fast motion. A scene. An idea occurred to Harry. Why hadn’t he thought about that sooner? Maybe Hermione would remember something when she saw everything they told her in her Pensieve necklace. But what if she saw his memories about the soul bounding?
“Harry, are you alright? You seemed hopeful for a moment, but now you look worried,” Hermione observed.
She’s getting better at discriminating my feelings from hers. Thank god our logical Hermione thinks she’s just reading my facial expression, Harry thought.
“I just had an idea. Hermione, where did you put the necklace you wore when we came here?” Harry asked.
“It’s in my bedside drawer. Why?” Hermione asked, clearly confused.
“It’s not just a necklace but a charmed Pensieve. I gave it to you as a present. The necklace contains memories of our friendship,” Harry explained.
Hermione’s eyes widened. “Really?! Oh, Harry, I had no idea. I would have never taken it off, if I had known what it was. It’s such a special gift. Why haven’t you told me about the necklace sooner?”
“I completely forgot,” Harry answered honestly. “There was so much on my mind and the idea that seeing all your memories would help you remember just came to me.”
“That’s a great idea! I’ll go and get it,” Hermione offered.
“I can do that,” Harry offered quickly and for a moment he thought that Hermione gave him a suspicious look.
“Don’t bother, I can do that,” Hermione offered and went to get the necklace.
Harry panicked for a moment when Hermione left and quickly thought of a way to get the necklace in his hands without being watched by Hermione. He just needed a minute to remove the newest memories.
“Ron, I need your help! When Hermione comes back, I need you to distract her for a moment. I need to remove the memories of our conversations about the soul bounding before Hermione gets a chance to experiment with the necklace on her own,” Harry pleaded.
“No way, mate. It was your idea not to tell Hermione anything about the soul bounding. I don’t want to lie to her,” Ron refused.
“I don’t like lying to Hermione either, but I think she should at least have a chance to get to know me a little before she finds out that we are married. Can you imagine what a shock it would be for Hermione if she found that out now? She has enough to deal with. I will tell Hermione the truth, Ron, but not now. Let’s give her time to rebuild her friendship with us and to prepare for the NEWTs in peace, before I tell her,” Harry asked.
The discussion between the friends was interrupted by Hermione’s return. Harry gave Ron one last pleading look before he returned his attention to Hermione.
“Hermione, could I ask you a quick question about Potions before we begin? Mandrake Draught will probably come in the NEWTs and I never get it right,” Ron said.
“Oh, sure,” Hermione said, after a moment of hesitation. Her eagerness to see the memories in the Pensieve seemed to be fighting with the approval of Ron’s new studiousness. “I’ll go and get my potions book,” Hermione said and left the room, leaving the necklace on the table.
“Thanks,” Harry said to Ron and quickly removed all his memories of the final battle and the aftermath from the Pensieve.
“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Ron said.
Harry sighed. “I hope so, too.”
Twenty minutes later – after Hermione had given Ron a detailed description of how to make a perfect Mandrake Draught – the three friends were sitting together on the couch and Hermione was holding her necklace.
“I think it works better if I show you the memories, since you don’t know what you’re looking for. I think you have to know what you are searching for to find a specific memory in a Pensieve,” Harry said and Hermione nodded.
“What would you like to see first?” Harry asked.
“I think we should start with the beginning. Can you show me our first meeting?” Hermione asked.
Harry searched for the particular memory and a moment later the three friends watched the younger versions of themselves talking on their first train ride to Hogwarts.
“I’ve been a terribly Know-it-all. It didn’t seem like you two liked me much,” Hermione noticed and Harry could feel regret and sadness from her.
“You’ve never been terrible, Hermione. You only wanted to keep us out of trouble. It just took us some time to figure that out. Do you want to see how we became friends?” Harry asked, trying to cheer Hermione up.
Hermione nodded and gave Harry a thankful smile.
“You two fought a Troll to save me when you were eleven?!” Hermione asked. She seemed to be unsure if she should be impressed or angry.
“We couldn’t leave you alone and we weren’t sure if there was enough time to get a teacher,” Harry explained, shrugging his shoulders, as if saving Hermione was the most natural thing in the world.
“Why was I crying?” Hermione asked and Ron suddenly looked very sheepish.
“That was my fault. I acted like a real jerk towards you. I’ve never really apologized for that, but I’m really sorry,” Ron said.
“It’s alright,” Hermione reassured him. “I don’t know what you did or said, but it doesn’t matter anymore. We’re friends now, right?”
Ron nodded thankfully.
“What would you like to see next?” Harry asked.
“I don’t know. Just show me some memories of which you think they are important,” Hermione said.
Harry thought for a moment and then he began showing Hermione memories. He showed her how she had helped him getting to the philosophers stone in first year and he showed her how she had hugged him and told him that all that matters are friendship and courage. He showed her how she had helped him rescue Sirius and Buckbeak in third year and how she had helped him to train for the Triwizard Tournament. When he got to the point where she wished him luck before he went into the labyrinth, Hermione gasped.
“Did you remember something?” Harry asked eagerly and Hermione nodded.
“I remember you coming back with a Portkey. You brought the body of one of the other champions with you. You were hurt and you were crying.” When Hermione said the last sentence she was close to tears herself. “I wanted to get to you so badly, but someone took you away before I got the chance.”
Harry nodded eagerly, despite the sad memory. “Yes, that’s right. The cup was a Portkey that lead to a place where Voldemort was waiting for me. Cedric Diggory and I reached the cup at the same time, so we decided to take it together.” Harry swallowed and looked to the ground at that point. “Voldemort let his servant kill Cedric as soon as we arrived there. He casually asked him to kill Cedric as if he were waste. Then Voldemort let his servant tie me up and take my blood. He needed it for the spell that brought him back. After that, Voldemort untied me and challenged me to a duel to show his followers that I’m no threat to him. It was only luck that helped me escape him. When I came back with Cedric’s body, a death eater who had transformed into one of our teachers with Polyjuice potion took me away to end what his master hadn’t managed. Dumbledore came just in time to save me,” Harry explained. It was hard for him to relive the memory, but he wanted to tell Hermione the rest of the story, hoping it would stir another memory.
Hermione suddenly hugged Harry tightly. “Oh Harry, I’m so sorry. That must have been terrible for you.”
Harry returned the hug and allowed himself to enjoy Hermione’s closeness for a moment, but he soon noticed that wasn’t his best idea. The hug reminded him of another time he had held Hermione in his arms and Harry could feel his body react to the memory. He quickly ended the hug before Hermione realized the change in his mood.
“Yes, it was hard, but you and the Weasley’s helped me a lot. You stood in the hospital wing with me nearly the whole night,” Harry said.
“I wish I could have done more,” Hermione replied sadly.
“You did more than enough for me in all those years. More than I can ever give you back,” Harry answered, feeling incredibly guilty for everything Hermione had been through because of him.
“You don’t have to give me anything back,” Hermione answered and gently squeezed Harry’s hand. “I’m sure I’ve done all this because you are my friend and because I wanted to. I just wished I would remember our friendship. You care so much about me and do everything to make me feel better. You risked your life for me, probably more often than the two times I know about and you gave me such a wonderful, special gift. Our friendship must be really special. It must be so terribly for you that I don’t remember you.”
“The most important thing is that you are alive. It would have been unbearable to lose you. I can deal with everything else and I know you can, too, because you are the strongest person I know. You already remembered something twice, that’s a good start. We can deal with this as long as we have each other,” Harry reassured Hermione.
“It looks like you don’t need me anymore, so I’ll just go to bed now,” said Ron, sounding a little sullen.
Harry and Hermione blushed when they heard their friend’s voice. They had completely forgotten that Ron was still there.
“I think I’ll go to bed, too,” Hermione said, quickly letting go of Harry’s hand.
“Yes, it’s been a long day and you should really get some rest,” Harry agreed hastily, trying to sound normal.
“You should go to bed, too. It’s getting late,” Hermione said.
Harry smiled at Hermione’s concern. “I will go to bed soon, I promise. Good night, Hermione. Good night, Ron.”
Harry had been sitting in the living room for a few minutes when he heard someone enter the room. He looked up and saw Lupin and Tonks coming towards him.
“Do you mind if we join you?” Lupin asked. It didn’t go unnoticed by Harry that Lupin looked even more serious than usual and even the usually cheerful Tonks looked like something bothered her.
“No, of course not. Is there a problem? Can’t you find the other Death Eaters?” Harry asked worried.
“No, that’s not the problem. We are actually on a trace at the moment and I’m optimistic that we will be able to find and arrest them soon,” Lupin answered.
“What’s the problem then? I know something is bothering you,” Harry said.
“I accidently overheard your conversation with Ron this evening and I think he is right,” Tonks said, not bothering with beating about the bush. “Hermione is no child that needs to be protected. She deserves to know the truth.”
Harry sighed. “If you overheard our conversation, you know that I plan to tell Hermione the truth eventually. I just don’t want her to have an additional burden right now. I’ll tell her when the NEWTs are over and she had time to get to know me again.”
“The longer you wait the more difficult it will be to tell her the truth, Harry,” Lupin argued. “The longer you wait with telling her the truth, the angrier she will be at you.”
“Maybe you’re right, but Hermione will probably be angry anyways because I didn’t tell her right away. It won’t make much of a difference if I waited a few days or two months. You know how important the NEWTs are to Hermione. It is difficult enough for her to concentrate on learning in this situation. I don’t want to add additional stress and maybe be responsible for Hermione getting Es instead of Os.” Harry said, only half-joking. He knew and E in the NEWTs would be a disaster for Hermione and although he didn’t think like that he didn’t want Hermione to be disappointed with her results. “Will you tell Hermione, if I don’t?” Harry asked Lupin and Tonks.
“No, but I think you should,” Lupin answered very seriously.
“I won’t tell Hermione, but if she suspects anything and asks me I will not lie to her,” Tonks stated.
Harry thanked his friends and went to his room, claiming to be tired. Although that was true, Harry was sure he wouldn’t be able to sleep. He lay awake for a long time, wondering if his friends’ were right and he was making a mistake.
The next weeks went by quite uneventful, despite the fact that Lupin, Tonks and Kingsley managed to find the remaining death eaters and sent them to Azkaban. With this danger out of the way, the three of them moved out. Tonks and Lupin were eager to see their son again and Kingsley just didn’t see a reason to stay at Grimmauld place any longer. After the three Aurors had moved out, the Grangers decided to return to their house, too. They claimed that they didn’t like being apparated to work, but Harry assumed that was only part of the reason for their move. The Grangers hadn’t seen their daughter in a time of exam preparation for seven years and they didn’t know how to deal with what Ron called “Hermione’s pre NEWT craziness”.
Hermione had indeed been difficult lately, but Harry couldn’t blame her for that considering everything she had to deal with. It frustrated Hermione that she didn’t make much progress remembering her past. She had had a few more memories watching the scenes Harry and Ron showed her, but she only remembered short scenes.
She wasn’t satisfied with the progress in her NEWT studies either. Harry and Ron always told her that she already knew more than nearly everybody else who had ever taken the NEWT exams, but Hermione was never satisfied.
“I’m never going to get this right!” Hermione exclaimed frustrated, looking at the pillow she had just transformed into a comfortable looking couch.
“What the hell is wrong with the couch?!” Ron, who still hadn’t managed more than a blanket, asked irritated.
“I wanted a burgundy colour, but the couch is scarlet!” Hermione nearly screamed.
“What’s the difference? Red is red!” Ron answered equally shrill.
“Stop it, you two,” Harry asked, trying very hard not to raise his voice. Hermione was moody enough and he didn’t want to irritate her further.
“I didn’t do anything!” Ron justified himself. “Talk to Hermione, she has gone nuts! Seriously, she’s completely unbearable lately.”
“Ron, right now you’re not very agreeable either. Why don’t you take some time to cool off and relax? Go flying or something,” Harry suggested.
Ron gave Hermione another angry look, but decided to act on Harry’s advice and leave before Hermione could hex him.
“Am I really unbearable?” Hermione asked Harry when Ron had left. Harry could tell she was close to tears.
“No, of course not,” Harry said and placed a comforting arm around her shoulders. “You’re a wonderful person, don’t ever doubt that. You’re just stressed, that’s all. You should take some time to rest. The couch looks great, but if you want to improve the colour, you’ll probably do better after a break.”
“I can’t take a break, Harry! The NEWTs are next month!” Hermione argued.
“Hermione, if you continue like that you will have no strength left for the actual exams,” Harry said worriedly. “I’m worried about you. You’re constantly on the verge of a breakdown and you’re on the best way to ruin your health. You look so pale lately.”
“Maybe you’re right.” Hermione admitted. “I haven’t been feeling well lately. I am always tired and sometimes I feel dizzy.”
Hermione’s admittance that she wasn’t feeling well only increased Harry’s concern. “That’s what I mean. You learn the whole day and spend the evenings trying to get your memories back. And when I go to bed, I still see light in your room, so I can only assume that you continue learning after our session with the Pensieve. You need to take better care of yourself. Why don’t you take a nap and I’ll call you when dinner is ready. You can continue your work after we’ve eaten.”
Hermione looked like she wanted to argue with Harry, but when she saw the worry in Harry’s eyes, she nodded.
“Alright, but I really have to continue practicing that spell after dinner.”
“Okay,” Harry agreed, relieved that Hermione listened to him.
“What’s for dinner anyways?” Hermione asked.
“I have no idea. Kreacher has probably planned something. Why, do you want something special?” Harry asked.
Hermione shrugged. “I don’t care as long as we have ice-cream for dessert. Oh, and do know if there’s any Muggle store in the neighbourhood? I would like to have M&Ms to put them over the ice-cream.”
Harry looked stunned. “Who are you and what have you done to Hermione Granger? Usually, you barely eat sweets at all.”
Hermione blushed. “I usually don’t, but I really fancy ice-cream with M&Ms today. I don’t have to have them if that’s a problem,” Hermione quickly added.
“No, it’s not a problem at all. Just go and take your nap and I’ll get you M&Ms in the meantime,” Harry promised.
Hermione beamed. “Thanks, Harry, you are really great.”
Chapter 9
The next month was difficult for Hermione. She was feeling worse from week to week. Hermione was constantly tired and sometimes dizzy and cravings for chocolate alternated with periods during which she felt too sick to eat. Hermione wondered if she always reacted like that to exam stress. She did remember the exams she had taken at Hogwarts, but not the time before. That was probably due to the fact that she hadn’t interacted with Harry during the exams, but he had nearly always been there when she had learned. Hermione remembered being nervous during the exams, but not feeling sick or dizzy. Maybe she was too distracted to feel these symptoms during the actual exams, but was always feeling miserable during the learning periods. She could ask Harry or Ron if her assumption was true, but she doubted that Ron would have noticed that she was feeling sick in previous years since he didn’t notice it now and she didn’t want to worry Harry further by admitted that she was feeling sick. He was worried enough about her.
Harry was really great. He did whatever he could to make her feel comfortable. He brought Hermione whatever sweets she craved and reacted with worry and understanding whenever she was irritated. Hermione felt already very close to Harry after the month she had spent at Grimmauld Place. Sometimes she had the feeling as if she could feel his emotions like her own and the other way around. She wondered why she felt that way about Harry, but not about Ron. Weren’t they both her best friends? She liked Ron, although he often irritated her, and she knew Ron cared about her, but she didn’t feel the closeness she felt with Harry with him.
It wasn’t only this strange feeling like she and Harry shared their emotions. Whenever Hermione remembered a detail during their Pensieve sessions it was about Harry. When Harry showed her the memory about her and him on Buckbeak’s back she remembered the first time she had seen Harry flying with the Hippogriff. She remembered how proud she had been at her friend for taming the giant creature, but how afraid she had been that Buckbeak would throw Harry off at the same time. Hermione remembered more little things about Harry: His look when she came down the stairs on the evening of the Yule Ball, her fear when she had seen him fighting the dragon in forth year, Harry’s anger and grief when he had found out that Sirius had supposedly betrayed his parents, Harry’s proud smile when Gryffindor had won the Quidditch cup in first year.
Harry had always been very happy when she remembered anything and had told her more about the situation. Hermione could feel that it was very hard for Harry to talk about certain memories, but he did it anyways. Hermione always did her best to comfort him by holding his hand or hugging him, although she wasn’t sure that was helping. Harry eagerly accepted her physical comfort, but he often pulled away after a few moments and looked even sadder than before.
Hermione was brought out of her thoughts by a knock on the door.
“Hermione, are you awake? Breakfast is ready,” Harry called.
“I’m not hungry. Just eat without me and I’ll come down when our Portkey leaves,” Hermione called through the door.
Professor McGonagall had prepared Portkeys for the students who were coming back to Hogwarts for their OWLs and NEWTs. That way they could come to Hogwarts without having to spend half the day on a train.
“May I come in?” Harry asked.
“Sure, come in,” Hermione replied.
“Hermione, you should really eat something, you need strength for the NEWTs,” Harry said, sitting down next to her on the small couch in her room.
“To be honest, I don’t think I could eat something; I’m feeling a little sick,” Hermione admitted. ‘A little sick’ was an understatement. Even the thought of food made Hermione want to throw up.
“You’re feeling sick?” Harry asked worriedly.
“It’s nothing. I’m sure it’s just nervousness; after all we’re going to take our NEWTs in an hour,” Hermione tried to reassure Harry.
“Hermione, I’ve seen you the morning before exams in the previous six years and you’ve never felt sick before. We should go to St. Mungo and see a healer. You haven’t been feeling well for weeks now and it’s getting worse; there’s something wrong with you.” Harry was sounding outright scared by now.
“Are you insane?! I can’t go to St. Mungo instead of taking my NEWTs!” Hermione exclaimed. “Let’s make a deal: If I’m still feeling sick tomorrow when our NEWTs are over I‘ll go and see Madame Pomfrey, alright?”
Harry nodded, but he was still looking worried. “Okay. Do you need anything? A cup of tea or something?”
Hermione smiled. Harry was really sweet. “No, thanks. Go and enjoy your breakfast. I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“Go!” Hermione said and playfully pushed Harry towards the door.
Half an hour later Harry, Ron and Hermione were standing in the living room, holding an old umbrella. Hermione gulped. Her stomach still hadn’t settled down and she wasn’t sure how it would take travelling by Portkey.
When Hermione felt the familiar tug behind her naval she got the answer to her question. The swirling made the nauseous feeling become unbearable and she knew she had to throw up. As soon as she landed on the meadow in front of the castle she fell to her knees and got sick. Harry quickly knelt down behind Hermione, holding her hair and rubbing her back as she threw up.
“Better?” Harry asked gently when Hermione was finally done heaving.
“A little,” Hermione answered weakly.
“I’m taking you to the Hospital Wing,” Harry said, helping Hermione up.
“No!” Hermione argued. “We have to be at the Transfiguration Classroom in thirty minutes and Madame Pomfrey won’t let me go without a thorough examination if you take me there. Please, Harry, whatever I have, it can wait until tomorrow afternoon. We have to take our exams. Our future...”
“...depends on it,” Harry finished her sentence, sounding irritated. “Hermione, you’re not up to taking your exams.”
“I’ll manage, Harry, I’m sure. Please,” Hermione begged.
Harry sighed. “Alright, but I’m getting you a glass of water. Ron, please take Hermione to Transfiguration, I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay,” Ron said, watching Hermione suspiciously. “You’re not going to puke again, are you?”
Hermione rolled her eyes. “I don’t think so.”
20 minutes later Harry joined Ron and Hermione, who was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall.
“I got you a glass of water and a cup of camomile tea. Aunt Petunia always made some for Dudley when he was feeling sick,” Harry said, handing Hermione the water.
Hermione smiled gratefully and quickly downed the water, happy to get rid of the ugly taste in her mouth. When Hermione had drunk her water Harry handed her the tea. Hermione slowly drank the hot liquid and noticed that it actually helped.
“Would you like me to massage your belly or something?” Harry asked, sounding desperate to do something more to help Hermione.
Hermione hesitated. Feeling Harry’s hands on her skin would probably feel quite intimate and she wasn’t sure if this was appropriate for a best friend, but Hermione realized that she wanted to be pampered by Harry.
“Okay,” Hermione said and Harry sat down behind her. Hermione leaned back against Harry’s chest and closed her eyes when Harry lifted her shirt and gently massaged her belly.
Hermione forgot everything around her. Her nausea, the amnesia, the students standing around them, even the NEWTs. All that mattered were Harry’s hands which felt so amazing on her skin, Harry’s breath in her neck, Harry’s smell... Hermione didn’t even notice when McGonagall started calling the students in to take their exams until it was her turn.
“Are you feeling better?” Harry asked and Hermione noticed that his face was only an inch from hers; their lips were almost touching. Hermione realized that this was what she wanted; she wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on hers. At this moment Hermione realized that she was falling in love with Harry.
“Miss Granger!” Professor McGonagall called for the third time and Hermione used all her will power to pull away from Harry and stand up.
“Much better, thank you,” Hermione said and reluctantly entered the classroom.
Hermione had no idea how, but she actually managed to concentrate on her NEWTs in Transfiguration and Charms. She barely spoke to Harry between the two exams; she just reassured him that she was really feeling well while they were waiting for Ron after they both had finished their Transfiguration exam. Hermione could tell that Harry knew she was hiding something from him, so she quickly distracted him by directing the talk to the NEWTs.
When Ron came out of his Charms NEWT and answered Hermione’s question how it went with a short “Okay, I guess.” Hermione couldn’t distract herself from the thoughts about Harry any longer. They had an hour lunch break before their NEWTs in Potions and Defence against the Dark Arts and Hermione spent the entire time thinking about Harry, barely noticing what she ate.
Had she been in love with him before she lost her memory? And had Harry returned her feelings? No, surely not. He would have told her if they had been in love with each other. Maybe he hadn’t known how she felt about him. That was the most plausible explanation. Hermione couldn’t believe that she had never felt more than friendship for Harry. She had only been spending two months with him after her memory loss and that had been enough for her to fall in love with him. How could she not fall in love with this brave and caring man? But if she had been in love with him before she lost her memory, was it possible that he really never noticed anything? Maybe he did notice and pretended not to know about her feeling because he knew he could never return them. This thought made Hermione incredibly sad.
“Are you okay?” Harry asked concerned.
“I’m fine. I just... I was thinking about my Transfiguration exam again. Do you think I get points taken away from me because the table and chairs set I transformed those matches into were from oak wood? Maybe I should have chosen a more elegant wood like mahogany.”
Ron groaned frustrated, but Harry was still watching Hermione with a concerned expression. He didn’t seem to buy her explanation.
The NEWTs in Potions and DADA went well and Hermione was very relieved when her first day of exams was over. When dinner was over she could go back to her dorm to escape Harry’s worried looks and repeated questions if she was really okay. Hermione had a busy day tomorrow. While the boys had only their NEWTs in Care of Magical Creatures tomorrow, Hermione had Herbology, Ancient Runes and Arithmancy as well.
“Where are you going?” Harry asked when the three friends had reached the Gryffindor tower and Hermione headed to the girls’ dormitories.
“I’m going to bed. It’s been a long day and I want to reread a few things for the exams tomorrow and then go to sleep early,” Hermione answered slightly confused.
“That’s a good idea, but your bed isn’t in the girls’ dorms. You’re Head Girl; we’ve got our own dorm,” Harry explained.
“We? So you’re Head Boy?” Hermione asked. “Why haven’t you mentioned that?”
Harry shrugged. “It didn’t matter. I mean, being Head Girl was important to you, but since we’re nearly done with school I didn’t see a reason to mention it.”
Hermione simply nodded and followed Harry to their dorm, where she went straight to her room. Harry seemed disappointed when Hermione didn’t stay in the common room with him, but he didn’t say anything. Hermione felt bad about disappointing Harry, but she needed some space. Now that she had discovered her feelings for Harry she wouldn’t be able to go over her notes for the remaining exams with Harry in the same room.
When Hermione entered the Heads common room the next morning Harry was already waiting for her.
“Hi, did you sleep well?” Harry asked.
“I slept fine, thank you,” Hermione lied. In fact she had lain awake for hours thinking about her confusing feelings for Harry before she finally fell asleep.
“Are you ready to meet Ron for breakfast?” Harry asked.
Hermione hesitated for a moment. She felt a little queasy again and wasn’t hungry at all, but she didn’t want Harry to worry, so she agreed. A slice of toast and a cup of tea should be okay.
To her surprise Ron was already waiting for them when they reached the Great Hall. His roommates had probably woke him up and hadn’t allowed him to stay in bed “just five minutes longer”.
“Morning,” Ron greeted his friends sleepily and reached for a can of coffee, filling his cup brimful. When the smell of coffee reached Hermione another wave of nausea hit her and she quickly fled the room. She needed fresh air.
Hermione stormed out of the castle, taking deep breaths and willing her stomach to calm down. A minute later she heard footsteps beside her and wasn’t surprised to find Harry standing next to her.
“I brought you a glass of water,” Harry said and handed her the glass. Hermione took a few sips and noticed to her relieve that the feeling of nausea passed.
“Thank. I’m already feeling better,” Hermione said.
“Hermione, you’re ill; you need to see Madame Pomfrey,” Harry replied.
“I will, right after my Arithmancy NEWT, I promise,” Hermione answered stubbornly. “Whatever I have, I will survive without medical help for nine more hours.”
Harry sighed, but didn’t say anything while they made their way to Hagrid’s cottage.
When the three were done with their NEWT in Care of Magical Creatures – Harry’s and Ron’s last exam – Ron suggested that he and Harry should go to Hogsmead.
“No, thanks, I’ll walk Hermione to the greenhouses,” Harry declined and Ron looked very disappointed.
“Nonsense, Harry. Go and amuse yourself. You’ve earned it; after all you’ve just taken your last exam. I am perfectly capable of walking to the greenhouses alone and I’ll probably spend most of lunch break looking over my notes for Arithmancy and Ancient Runes. You really don’t have to stay here. Let’s just meet in the Great Hall for lunch,” Hermione suggested.
Harry reluctantly agreed and allowed Ron to drag him to Hogsmead.
After her NEWT in Herbology Hermione had a quick lunch and then used the remainder of lunch break to go over her notes for the last two exams.
Hermione was one of the first students to take the NEWT in Arithmancy, so she was done with her last exam at quarter to 5.
To her surprise Hermione found Harry waiting for her in front of the classroom when she was done.
“Harry, what are you doing here? I thought we would meet for dinner in an hour. Where’s Ron?” Hermione asked.
“I’m waiting for you to accompany you to Madame Pomfrey since we still have an hour until lunch. Ron is in his dorm, sleeping. He had a few too many butter beers,” Harry answered.
“I should have known; of course Ron would celebrate Graduation thoroughly. I’m surprised that you are sober,” Hermione said.
“Not completely sober; I’ve had three butter beers. Are you ready to go to the Hospital Wing?” Harry asked.
“Sure, but I’m only coming to appease you; I’m feeling perfectly fine,” Hermione answered truthfully. She was really feeling fine; the dizziness and nausea must have been a reaction to the NEWT stress.
Ten minutes later Harry and Hermione had reached the Hospital Wing.
“Miss Granger, how are you?” Madame Pomfrey asked.
“I’m starting to remember a few things, but only single scenes, not more,” Hermione answered.
“That’s more than I would have expected to be honest. That you start remembering things is a very good sign,” the school nurse reassured Hermione.
“That’s not the reason we are here though,” Harry told Madame Pomfrey. “Hermione hasn’t been feeling well lately.”
“What is wrong with you then?” the school nurse asked.
“It’s really nothing, but Harry insisted that I come here. During the last weeks I’ve been feeling dizzy and sick, but that’s probably only because I was nervous because of the NEWTs,” Hermione explained.
Madame Pomfrey looked worried when Hermione described her symptoms. She gave Harry a disapproving look before asking Hermione to sit down on one of the beds.
The school nurse murmured a spell and pointed her wand at Hermione’s belly. A silver light built at the end of the wand and formed a ring around Hermione’s belly. Madame Pomfrey frowned and gave Harry another angry look.
“What does this mean? Is something wrong with me?” Hermione asked.
“That depends on your definition of wrong, Miss Granger,” the older woman answered. “You are pregnant.”
“Pregnant?!” Hermione and Harry exclaimed at the same time.
“That’s not possible!” Hermione said. “I haven’t... I mean I don’t even remember a boyfriend!”
“I think this is a topic you should discuss with Mister Potter. I will leave you two alone,” Madame Pomfrey said and left the room.
“She’s right, Harry! You are my best friend, you must know my boyfriend! There was a boyfriend, right? I mean, I’m not the kind of girl who sleeps around or am I?” Hermione asked desperately.
“No!” Harry quickly said. “You are not one of those girls, Hermione. There... there has only been one guy you’ve been... intimate with.”
“But why isn’t he here? Why has he never come to see me? What happened? Who is he?” Hermione asked under tears.
Harry swallowed nervously, but sat down next to Hermione.
“He has been there all the time,” Harry answered.
“What? Harry, I don’t understand,” Hermione said.
“During my fight with Voldemort something went terribly wrong. I ended up with a part of Voldemort’s soul inside my body and my own soul was too weak to survive on its own. There was only one way to remove Voldemort’s soul from my body without weakening my own soul too much. I had to bind my soul to the soul of another human being in a soul bounding ceremony. Professor McGonagall suggested my girlfriend at this time, but we couldn’t imagine doing something so intimate. You got really mad at my former girlfriend and eventually offered to do the soul bounding ceremony with me instead of her. We all came to the conclusion that this was a good solution because we were so close already. The only thing we didn’t know at the time was that the soul bounding ceremony wouldn’t be complete before the consummation of the magical marriage,” Harry explained.
Hermione stared in shock at Harry. “We are soul bound? And we slept with each other? You are the father of my baby?”
Harry nodded.
“But why didn’t we use protection?!” Hermione exclaimed.
“We did. Sort of. Professor McGonagall took our wands from us before the wedding night; she was afraid Voldemort might try to take my body over and thought it was safer to take our wands. Madame Pomfrey performed an anti-pregnancy charm on you, but it didn’t last long enough,” Harry explained.
“What do you mean with ‘it didn’t last long enough’?!” Hermione asked in a shrill tone. “An anti-pregnancy charm lasts three hours!”
Harry blushed. “We...ahm... In the morning after the wedding night we... we slept with each other...again.”
“What?! How could we have been so stupid?!”
Harry didn’t answer, he just looked at the floor sheepishly. For some reason this made Hermione even angrier.
“And when exactly did you plan to tell me that we are magically married and soul bound?! Did you plan to tell me at all? You probably thought ‘Oh great, now she has lost her memory and we can literally forget about this night’! That must be something you really wanted to forget, it must have been such a sacrifice to sleep with plain old Hermione! How convenient that I don’t remember the whole thing!”
“Hermione, no! It wasn’t like that at all!” Harry exclaimed quickly.
“Forget it, I don’t want to hear your bloody excuses!” Hermione screamed and stormed out of the room.
A/N: Yes, it’s really me. I know I haven’t updated for ages and I’m really sorry, especially since I can’t even give you a good explanation like I had much work, I was ill, I was traveling or something like that. I simply had a total writers block because real life has been quite depressing and I simply wasn’t in the mood to write. I’ve graduated from university several months ago and have been looking for a job since then. I have good grades (As in all exams and a B in my final thesis), but I keep getting rejections because I don’t have any practical experience. I couldn’t stay in my dorm after graduating and I can’t afford my own place because I don’t have a job, so I’m sleeping on the couch of my mother with whom I have a very difficult relationship. So, I’ve been in a really bad mood most of the time and couldn’t get myself to write. I want to thank all my readers for their reviews and their patience while waiting for an update, especially johnlovesme and Silverbeawer for their encouraging reviews and for pushing me to continue with this story. That meant a lot to me.
Chapter 10
Harry’s first impulse was to go after Hermione immediately, but then he remembered that he should talk to Madame Pomfrey before their Portkey left tomorrow morning. He wanted to ask the school nurse for a potion that helped with Hermione’s morning sickness and he needed to make sure that it was safe for Hermione to travel by Portkey.
15 minutes later Harry left the infirmary with a supply of anti-nausea potions for Hermione and the reassurance that she and the baby were perfectly healthy and there was nothing speaking against travelling by Portkey.
When Harry had reached the Common Room there was a spontaneous party going on to celebrate the end of the exams. Ron, who was looking grumpy but more sober than when Harry had last seen him, was sitting on one of the couches.
“Harry, can’t you tell them to turn the volume of the music down, being Head Boy and all? I can’t sleep with all the noise,” Ron complained.
“Have you seen Hermione?” Harry asked, ignoring Ron’s request.
“She went to the Head’s quarters. Just ran past me without saying a word,” Ron told Harry.
Harry quickly made his way to the Head’s quarters, followed by Ron.
“Hey, what’s wrong with you guys?” Ron asked.
Harry went straight to Hermione’s bedroom and knocked. “Hermione, it’s me, Harry. Please open the door and let me explain,” Harry begged. When he didn’t get a reply he tried to open the door with “Alohomora”, but it didn’t work. Hermione had probably protected her door with a password.
“What’s going on here?” Ron asked irritated.
Harry sighed and turned around to face his friend. “Hermione knows about the soul bounding.”
“I guess she didn’t take it very well. I told you so,” Ron said.
Harry shot him an angry glance, but didn’t say anything. He knew Ron was right.
“So, how did she find out?” Ron asked, not bothering to lecture Harry further.
“I told her,” Harry said, pausing, not knowing how Ron would react to the rest of the story. Ron had realized that he and Hermione weren’t meant to be together, but he still felt protective towards his female best friend. Harry didn’t know how Ron would react to the news that he had gotten Hermione pregnant.
“You told her? When? Where?” Ron asked surprised.
“I told her after Madame Pomfrey examined Hermione. I wanted to make sure that she really goes, so I accompanied her,” Harry answered.
Even Ron, who was one of the most insensitive people Harry knew, realized that Harry was leaving something out.
“She isn’t seriously ill, is she?” Ron asked alarmed.
“No, she isn’t ill,” Harry reassured Ron. “She’s pregnant.”
“What?! But how… I mean I know how, but… You were the only one Hermione has slept with and you used protection. You did use protection, right?”
Harry blushed and looked to the ground. “Yes, we did use protection. Sort of. Professor McGonagall took our wands, so Madame Pomfrey performed the anti-pregnancy charm on Hermione before the wedding, but the spell only lasts three hours…”
“And?” Ron asked. “Did you need more than three hours to figure out what to do or what?!”
“Ron! I knew how this works, okay?!” Harry exclaimed, offended. “We… we slept with each other again the next morning,” Harry muttered.
“What?! You had sex with Hermione when the anti-pregnancy charm had worn off?! How could you be so stupid?!” Ron exclaimed.
“I got distracted! I didn’t think, okay?” Harry said in a shrill tone.
“No, it’s not okay! What are you going to do about this?” Ron asked.
“I know what I want, but it’s Hermione’s decision and I doubt she wants the same. I want to ask Hermione to marry me for real, to move in with me and raise our child together. I want us to be a family, but Hermione doesn’t even want to talk to me She thinks I didn’t tell her about our marriage because I don’t see her as anything else than a friend,” Harry said sadly.
“Oh sure, you only see her as a friend and that’s why you couldn’t wait to shag her again the next morning,” Ron said sarcastically.
Harry gave his friend an angry look and he shrugged. “What?! That should be proof enough that you want more than friendship from her. Girls can be so illogical,” Ron complained.
“Hermione isn’t able to think logical right now. She is so upset and it’s all my fault,” Harry said, looking down.
Ron looked at Harry intently before he spoke again. “You really love her, do you?” Ron asked in a friendlier tone.
Harry nodded. “I love her with all my heart and if she didn’t hate me I would be overjoyed because she is carrying my child.”
“She doesn’t hate you, Harry, she’s just mad. Don’t drive yourself crazy about that. She just needs some time to cool off,” Ron reassured Harry.
“She is so upset, Ron. This stress isn’t good for her in her state,” Harry said worriedly.
“She’s pregnant, not deathly ill, Harry. Hey, my mum already had five children, two of them being Fred and George, when she was pregnant with me. Stress was her daily routine and she and I are perfectly healthy. You’re worrying too much. Just give Hermione a few hours to calm down and then talk to her,” Ron advised.
“Thanks, Ron. Both for the advice and for not hexing me,” Harry said sincerely.
“No problem. Oh, and congratulations,” Ron said, before leaving to give Harry and Hermione some privacy.
Hermione was crying on her bed when she heard a knock on the door and Harry’s voice. He asked her to open the door and let him explain, but she didn’t want to hear his explanations. He had kept the information that they were married and magically bound to each other to him. How did he want to explain that anyway? Was there another explanation than that he wanted to go back to their platonic friendship. On the other hand he did mention that they slept with each other again after the consummation of the marriage. That meant Harry must feel some kind of attraction to her. That didn’t say much though. Harry was a male teenager after all and weren’t those known to get horny when they see a naked female? Hermione was so confused. Harry had been incredibly sweet and caring towards her. Did this mean his feelings for her went beyond friendship or was it just the way he was? Would he have been as concerned and caring if it had been Ron who lost his memory? Probably not, but that was an inappropriate comparison. Ron was a guy and Harry was a gentleman. Would he be so protective of any female friend? Hermione couldn’t answer that question based on the last two months and the memories she had already seen in the Pensieve, so she took the necklace off and pointed her wand at it, randomly selecting a scene. Maybe she could answer her questions by seeing more memories of her and Harry’s past. She could try and see his interaction with her with the eyes of an outsider; that might help her to gain clarity about Harry’s feelings for her.
Hermione spent the next hours randomly watching scenes from the Pensieve.
She saw many scenes she had already seen with Harry and Ron, but some new ones, too. She watched Harry holding her hand while she was lying in a hospital bed, petrified, in second year. She saw Harry’s concerned expression in third year, when Hermione had been stressed by her immense work load and the constant arguments with Ron. She saw the terror in Harry’s eyes when he watched her get injured during the Battle at the Department of Mystery. She watched how Harry comforted her when she had been upset because of Ron and Lavender. So she had fancied Ron?! The thought was more than a little disturbing. She liked Ron, but she could never imagine having a relationship with him. Obviously, her taste had become better during the last year. Harry had always been there for her and had comforted her when Ron hadn’t even noticed that she was upset. Hermione was surprised that it had taken her seven years to fall in love with him. By now Hermione felt guilty for snapping at Harry like that. She should have given him the opportunity to explain why he had kept the information about the soul bounding from him. He had always been such a good friend; he must have had a good reason not to tell her something that important.
Hermione stood up, intending to go and talk to Harry, but stopped when she had reached the door. She still didn’t know how Harry felt about her.
Hermione sat down on her bed and grabbed her wand and Pensieve again. There had to be some memories which told her how Harry felt about her.
Hermione looked through the memories in her Pensieve, not really knowing what she was looking for. After a few minutes she spotted a memory she hadn’t seen before. She and Harry were sitting in a room she didn’t recognize, having a candle light dinner. Hermione was surprised. The scene looked like a date. Had she and Harry dated before she lost her memory? Intrigued, Hermione started watching the whole memory. After a quiet dinner, memory Harry gave memory Hermione a gift which she recognized as the Pensieve necklace she was holding. “I know this isn’t a real wedding, but I want to give you a wedding gift nevertheless,” memory Harry said. Hermione gasped. Harry had given her the necklace as a wedding gift. The scene she was watching took place during their wedding night! Hermione held her breath, eagerly waiting for the rest of the memory. She watched the memory versions of her and Harry exchanging a hug before memory Hermione led a very sheepish Harry to a big bed. Hermione blushed when she watched the memory version of her slowly seducing Harry, who seemed to be enjoying himself very much considering his facial expression and the growing bulge in his pants. Hermione felt tears in her eyes when Harry confessed that he felt guilty because she had to sleep with him. He was so sweet. It was obvious that Harry desired her, but her wellbeing was more important to him than his pleasure. Hermione watched memory Harry giving in and passionately returning memory Hermione’s kisses after Hermione had reassured him that she was fine. Watching Harry kissing her and caressing her naked breasts was the most erotic thing Hermione had ever seen. She could actually feel her lips tingling from his kisses and she thought she felt his fingers brushing over her nibbles. Hermione moaned when memory Harry started caressing memory Hermione between her legs. Hermione knew where Harry was touching her although she couldn’t see it from her position and she knew how it had felt being touched there by him. When Harry entered Hermione in the memory she remembered. She remembered the pleasure and the pain she had felt when Harry had entered her. She remembered the confusing but intimate feeling of being able to share Harry’s emotions during and after the union. She remembered how it had felt to hold Harry after they had made love. She remembered the second time they had made love, the time when they had created the baby she was carrying. She remembered the wedding and Harry’s declaration of love. She remembered everything.
Hermione felt incredibly sorry when she remembered the accusations she had thrown at Harry in the hospital wing. Harry had confessed his love to her, hoping she would reciprocate his feelings before she had lost her memory. It must have been awful for him to love a woman who didn’t even remember him, but he had always been there for her nevertheless and now she accused him of not loving her.
Hermione looked at the clock on her nightstand. It was already past midnight. Hermione hoped that Harry was still awake despite of the late hour. She needed to apologize to him and she needed to hear his explanation for not telling her about the soul bounding.
When Hermione opened the door she was surprised to find Harry sitting on the floor next to it. He quickly sat up when he saw that the door was opened.
“Hermione…”
“Harry, what are you doing here?” Hermione asked surprised. “How long have you been sitting here?”
“Ever since I came back from the hospital wing. Well, nearly since then, because I’ve talked to Ron for a few minutes first, but that’s not the point. I have been waiting for you to open the door, because I really need to talk to you. Hermione, I love you,” Harry said desperately.
“I know,” Hermione told a surprised Harry. “I’ve put my memories of our wedding, the wedding night and our talk the next morning in the Pensieve and I saw them tonight. I remember, Harry. Seeing the memory of our wedding night somehow stirred all my other memories.”
“You remember everything?” Harry asked hopefully and Hermione nodded.
“I’m sorry, Harry. I should have never doubted that you love me. But why didn’t you tell me about the soul bounding?”
“I’m sorry, too. I should have told you the truth right away. I just… I thought it would be too much for you. You had to deal with your memory loss and all the NEWT stress and I thought it would be too much of a shock for you to learn that you are married and soul bound to somebody who was a complete stranger to you. And to be completely honest, I was afraid. I was afraid of your reaction. I thought if I wait with telling you until we had the time to rebuild our friendship we could stay friends even after I told you everything. And I was going to tell you, I swear. You deserve to know about the soul bounding and you deserve to know that I love you,” Harry explained.
“I love you, too, Harry. I think I have for a long time, I was just too blind to notice it,” Hermione confessed.
“Really?” Harry asked hopefully.
“Yes, really,” Hermione reassured Harry. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not mad at you anymore,” she added in a stern tone. “I’m not made of glass, Harry, I can handle the truth!”
“I know, Hermione. I should have been honest with you. I know you’re strong and you can handle whatever you have to. It’s just… I still want to protect you, although I know you can care for yourself. I love you so much and I don’t want you to suffer if there’s anything I can do to prevent it. But I messed it up and ended up hurting you. I’m so sorry,” Harry said.
“Apology accepted. Just don’t keep something important from me again,” Hermione demanded.
“I promise,” Harry agreed gladly and hugged Hermione tightly but carefully.
Hermione returned the hug and snuggled against Harry. She closed her eyes and enjoyed to be held by Harry for a few precious moments.
“What do we do now?” Hermione asked. “We’re barely of age and have just finished school. I thought about starting at the Ministry or maybe as a healer at St. Mungo, but when we get the results of the NEWTs in September I will probably start showing. And who hires a pregnant woman? They will know that I had to go in maternity leave after a few months. But how can I care for a baby if I don’t earn money? And who will care for the baby when I get a job eventually? You will have just started an education as well when the baby will be born and you won’t earn much during that time.”
Harry smiled reassuringly. “Don’t worry about money, Hermione. I was at Gringotts the day we came back from Hogwarts to claim my inheritance from my parents and Sirius. We have enough money to support us and as many children we want for as long as we live. You can stay at home with our baby as long as you want if that’s what you want. But of course you don’t have to. We can hire a good nanny and you can start an education as soon as you feel up to it after the birth,” Harry reassured Hermione.
“So you want the baby?” Hermione asked.
Harry looked hurt at the question. “Of course I want the baby! All I’ve ever wanted is a family. I love you and having a family with you will be wonderful. Don’t you want it?”
“Oh, Harry, of course I do! It’s not really the best time to start a family, but I want this baby. How could I not love something that is a part of you and me, a product of our love?”
Harry beamed and kissed Hermione passionately. “I love you so much,” he whispered when he had caught his breath again.
Before Hermione could say anything Harry took a small box from the pocket of his robes.
“I’ve got something for you,” Harry said and handed her the box.
Hermione opened the box and gasped surprised when she saw the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. It was a gold ring with a perfect diamond. It was fairly large, but still tasteful. The oval jewel was embedded in a beautiful, intricately carved setting, making the ring look very old. It was the most beautiful piece of jewelry Hermione had ever seen, but Hermione only gave it a short glance because all her attention was captured by Harry when he went down on one knee in front of her.
“Hermione, I am not very good with words, but I want you to know that I love you more than words can say. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else, more than my own life. You would make me the happiest man on earth if you agreed to spend the rest of your life with me. Hermione Jean Granger, do you want to marry me for real?”
Hermione felt tears of joy streaming down her face. She didn’t trust her voice, so she simply nodded and bent down to take Harry’s hands, gently pulling him up. When Harry and Hermione were on eye level again Hermione threw her arms around Harry’s neck and kissed him passionately. Hermione put everything she felt for Harry in this one kiss. The joy his proposal had brought her, the happiness about finally remembering everything they had shared during these last seven years, the relieve she felt because Voldemort was gone and she didn’t have to fear for Harry’s life anymore, the excitement about their future and the family they were starting, the passion, the trust and most of all the love she felt for Harry. She put all the feelings she couldn’t word right now in this one kiss and hoped Harry would understand.
After what felt like an eternity but still was too short, Harry pulled away and he and Hermione caught their breaths.
“So, I assume that was a yes,” Harry said with a big grin.
Hermione smiled brightly. “That was most definitely a yes,” Hermione confirmed.
Harry took the ring from the box Hermione was still holding and gently placed the engagement ring on her right hand. “It’s the engagement ring my father gave my mother. It’s a family heirloom. I took it from Gringotts the day after we got back from Hogwarts. I didn’t know if you would accept my proposal back then, but I wanted you to have this ring no matter if you said yes or no. You’ve always been the most important girl in my life and you’re the only woman I want to wear my mother’s ring.”
“You’re giving me your mother’s ring?” Hermione asked amazed. She knew how important every precious connection he had to his parents was to Harry and she was very touched that he gave one of these rare treasures to her.
Harry nodded. “I’m sure my parents would be very proud to see you wearing it. Of course you can have another ring, if you’d like that better,” Harry quickly added. “You can pick your own engagement ring if you’d rather have something modern.”
“Oh, Harry, no! The ring is perfect and I feel honored because you gave it to me,” Hermione reassured Harry.
“Do you have any idea how happy you make me?” Harry asked, pulling Hermione in his arms.
“I think I have,” Hermione answered with a smile. “And I’m happy that I am able to make you feel this way. You deserve all the happiness in the world.”
“I will do whatever I can to make you as happy as you make me,” Harry promised.
Hermione grinned mischievously. “Really? I know the perfect way for you to start.”
Before Harry could say anything Hermione kissed him again and let her hands wander under Harry’s shirt, caressing his chest. Harry responded with the same passion Hermione showed, but stopped when she started to unbutton his shirt.
“Hermione, are you sure this is a good idea in your state? Won’t we hurt the baby?” Harry asked concerned.
Hermione rolled her eyes. “I’m pregnant, Harry, not ill. The baby is perfectly safe.”
“You’re sure?” Harry asked hopefully.
Hermione grinned. She could feel Harry’s excitement – both physically in form of the obvious erection pressing against her belly and emotionally through the bound they shared. She knew he wanted this as much as she.
“Yes, Harry, I’m sure that we won’t hurt the baby,” Hermione reassured him.
Harry didn’t need further encouragement. He kissed Hermione again, but this time it was a slow and sweet kiss. Harry unbuttoned Hermione’s blouse without breaking the kiss. When he had opened all buttons he slid the piece of fabric off Hermione’s shoulders and carelessly threw it on the floor. When Hermione pulled back for air Harry gently kissed Hermione’s forehead, her cheek, her shoulder and the soft skin behind her ear before kneeling down in front of her again. Harry gave Hermione’s belly several butterfly kisses and light caresses. “I love you so much,” Harry whispered and Hermione wasn’t sure if he was talking to her or the baby growing inside of her.
After a few moments of kissing and caressing her still flat belly Harry stood back up, picked Hermione up and carried her to her bedroom where he gently laid her down. They started kissing again, only letting go of each other long enough to remove the rest of their clothes. When they were completely naked Harry’s kisses moved from Hermione’s lips to her throat and neck while his hands wandered further south. Hermione moaned loudly when she felt Harry’s hand on her breasts. The combined sensation of Harry’s lips on her neck and his fingers circling her nipples was overwhelming, but she needed more. She didn’t know if it was because she had watched the memories of their wedding night, because of the pregnancy hormones or simply because she was a teenager who was just discovering the pleasures of sex, but she was incredibly horny.
“Harry, I need you,” Hermione moaned.
Harry grinned and obviously decided to tease her a little longer, because he continued kissing her naked skin. Torturously slowly Harry formed a trail of kisses from Hermione’s neck to her breasts. Harry gave Hermione’s nibbles a few light kisses before he started sucking on her left nibble while massaging its twin with his thumb and index finger. When Hermione thought she couldn’t take this sweet torture any longer Harry gently spread her legs with his hands and started stroking her lower lips with his thumbs, avoiding the spot where she wanted to be touched most.
“Harry, please!” Hermione moaned and Harry obviously decided to be nice and stopped teasing her. He gently started massaging her clit, using exactly the right amount of pressure. Harry surely was a fast learner.
“Harry,” Hermione moaned, not being able to say anything coherent. Harry increased the pressure and speed of his ministrations and Hermione started panting. He inserted two fingers and Hermione gasped at the feeling of being filled. When Hermione thought it couldn’t become any better his fingers hit a certain spot inside her and Hermione knew it must have been her G-spot. She had read about this mysterious spot but she hadn’t thought anything could feel as good as Harry stroking her G-spot and her clit simultaneously. “Oh god!” Hermione moaned and a few moments later the built up tension in her groin exploded into an intense orgasm.
When Hermione came back to earth the first thing she noticed was that Harry was lying next to her, gently stroking her hair.
“Wow,” Hermione said. “What happened to the shy guy I had to literally drag to bed on our wedding night?”
Harry smiled warmly. “This time, I had no doubt that you wanted this. Wanted me. This makes all the difference in the world,” Harry explained. “And that I could feel how much you enjoyed this didn’t hurt either,” he added with a coy smile.
“Yes, this soul bounding thing does come in handy, doesn’t it? Although I don’t need a mystique connection to know how much you want me right now,” Hermione said, looking at Harry’s obvious hard-on. “It’s your turn,” she told him, smiling suggestively.
Hermione sat down between Harry’s legs, leaning forward to give him a perfect view of her breasts. She smiled when she saw the lust in his eyes. Hermione didn’t consider herself a beauty, but when Harry looked at her like this she felt sexy and desirable. With all the confidence this feeling gave her Hermione began to stroke Harry’s cock with both hands causing him to moan. Hermione could feel Harry’s arousal, she saw his eyes darken with lust and could hear his breathing becoming labored. Seeing Harry like this and knowing that it was her who made him feel like this was an immense turn-on. Hermione started to massage the sensitive tip of Harry’s penis with one hand while stroking his balls with the other one.
“Oh god … Hermione … so good… ” Harry panted. Hermione could feel Harry losing it and she knew it would only be a matter of seconds before he would reach his climax. Hermione abruptly stopped her ministrations and chuckled at Harry’s confused and disappointed expression.
“Not so fast,” she said, grinning. “I want you to come inside of me.”
Before Harry could formulate a reply Hermione positioned herself above Harry and gently guided him inside of her. Hermione moaned when Harry thrust into her. She loved it when he pleasured her with his hands, but nothing could ever feel as good as being joined with Harry in the most intimate way. It was as if they were one person instead of two separate human beings. During these precious moments they were truly one – their hearts, minds and bodies worked in perfect synch. Harry met her movements in perfect harmony, with just the right force, hitting all the right spots. Within a few minutes Hermione was panting and moaning incoherently. She was very close and she could feel that Harry was as desperate for release as she was. “Hermione!” Harry moaned and a moment later he came hard, pulling her over the edge with him.
Hermione collapsed on Harry’s chest and enjoyed his lazy caresses on her back while they caught their breaths. She didn’t know if they had lain like that for a few minutes or for hours when she felt Harry’s lips on her forehead. Hermione opened her eyes and met Harry’s loving gaze.
“Are you okay?” Harry asked and Hermione smiled brightly.
“More than okay,” she reassured him and shifted a little, so she was lying half next to and half on top of Harry.
Harry pulled the covers over him and Hermione and put his arms around her. They just lay like this for a few minutes and Hermione enjoyed listening to the steady rhythm of Harry’s heart while he gently caressed her back.
“Hermione?” Harry asked eventually. “Do you think I’ll be a good father? I mean, I can’t remember my own father and I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do,” he confessed.
Hermione looked up to meet Harry’s gaze. “Harry, you’ll be a great dad. Our baby is very lucky to have you as a father. You are the most caring man I know and you already love this baby so much. I’ll probably have to keep you from spoiling him or her rotten, but aside from that you’ll do great.”
“You mean you won’t let me spoil our kid?” Harry asked, sounding very disappointed.
Hermione laughed. “You may spoil him or her a little.”
Harry smiled and the mischievous look in his eyes told her that they would have many discussions about the meaning of “a little”.
“May I spoil you?” Harry asked.
“Harry, you don’t have to spoil me. I’ve already got everything I want,” Hermione said.
“So you’re happy?” Harry asked, letting his hand rest on Hermione’s belly.
Hermione smiled. “Yes, Harry, I’m happy. I’m overwhelmed and a little scared, because everything is moving so fast. I would have never thought I’d be married and a mother with 19, but I am happy. I just hope my parents won’t get a heart attack when I tell them that they missed my wedding and that they’ll be grandparents in seven months.”
“We could have a muggle wedding with your parents and whoever else you want to have there. Our marriage is only legal in the wizarding world, so we could have a muggle ceremony, too,” Harry suggested.
Hermione smiled. “That would be great. I would love to have a real wedding with my whole family. Not that I don’t consider our marriage real,” Hermione quickly added. “We already have a deeper bound than a piece of paper could create. But I want to make it official. I want to say yes to you knowing that you and everybody else know that I mean every word.”
”I want that, too. I want everybody in the muggle and wizarding world to know that we belong together. And I want you to have the wedding you deserve,” Harry said.
Hermione smiled and snuggled even closer to Harry. She imagined the wedding they would have. This time there would be no doubt that this was the real thing. There would be flower girls, crying mothers and grandmothers, music, dancing and everything that made a wedding perfect. But that wasn’t what Hermione was really looking forward to. When she imagined their wedding she envisioned her and Harry exchanging their vows and renewing their promises to each other knowing that they did this for no other reason than their love for each other.