What's In A Name?

papermask

Rating: PG
Genres: Angst, Romance
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 7
Published: 25/01/2009
Last Updated: 19/10/2010
Status: in_progress

Hermione reflects on her marriage with Ron, why she still has feelings for Harry, and what is truly in a name.

Chapters

1. Chapter 1

2. Chapter 2

3. Chapter 3

4. Chapter 4

5. Chapter 5

6. Chapter 6

7. Chapter 7

8. Chapter 8

9. Chapter 9

1. Chapter 1

Well, I'm back for another round. I'll probably be updating Forseen soon, so keep an eye out for that, although, I'm not sure how well that story will be received. But, that's neither here nor there. I hope you enjoy this story. At this point, I'm not sure how long it will be.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
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"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."

Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2)

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I am thirty years old. I'm too old for this. This ancient, girlish crush. This should have ended ages ago. I should have moved on, given my new life a chance, let the changes occur. And yet...

No. I musn't think that way. I cannot think that way. Get a grip, Hermione Granger. But wait....that's not right, is it? No, it's not 'Granger' anymore. That name, that person, is long gone. I doubt if I'll ever see her again, too. It's a new person, now. It has been for all these years, and I've never gotten used to it. 'Weasley'. Don't get me wrong, I adore the Weasley's, and I almost always considered myself one of them, but this....this is just too different. It feels alien and obscure. It's....well, in a simple sense, it's not me. But that raises the question - would I have been me with him? Would I have been myself with Harry? Granted, he would have let me choose. He would have left the choice of changing my name up to me, instead of picking out my name for me. No, wait. That's not a fair statement. Ron did let me have a choice in the matter. But....he was just so infantile about the whole situation. He insisted that I take his name and would pout and moan every time I explained how I wanted to keep my name. We fought so much about that one little topic. He didn't even understand that I was joking when I offered that he change his name to match mine. What a tantrum he threw at that point. Finally I just agreed to change my name. It didn't even seem worth it anymore. But it seems worth it now. I let out a sigh.

Maybe I am making too much of this. I mean, it's years later and, after all, it's only a name. I crinkle my eyebrows. But it was my name. And there's that still unanswered question - would Harry have let me choose? Would I have chosen to keep my name, or to hyphenate it? Or maybe I would have chosen to take his name? Or, perhaps, in a spin on everything, he would have taken my name? I grin slightly at the prospect. 'Harry Granger'. It was sort of funny. But it doesn't stick as well as Harry Potter. I stare down at my hands, as I've completely lost myself in thought. I watch my hands knit, as if they have a mind of their own. I can't even remember what I'm making. I pull up the rest of the material to see what I'm knitting. Ah, a pair of green socks. I smile. For Harry, I remember. I frown. The universe has an odd way of reminding us of the things we'd most like to forget.

Why do I still think of him? Well, that was a silly question. He's my greatest friend. What I meant to ask myself is, why do I still think of him in that way? It's been years. Too many to count. He's never shown any interest in me as more than a good friend, so why do I continue to have these feelings? And, besides, I've been married now for ages, with two kids to boot. And yet, as bad as it sounds, I feel like I settled. I feel like I could have had more, I could have had something better, and I hate myself for it. I shouldn't feel that way - I have a husband who is, granted insensitive and rude at times, but he still loves me. And I have two of the greatest kids ever who think the world of me. And still, part of me wishes that those kids were Harry's. Why do these feeling still torment me, damnit! I throw my knitting to the floor, tears welling in my eyes. I walk to the window, where the rain is starting to trickle from the sky. It matches the flow of my tears. I feel utterly damned for feeling this way, and I'm not kidding. I truly feel as if I am in some sort of spiritual danger because of these feelings that I have. These wretched feelings. And still....

My favorite smells will always be parchment and freshly cut grass and Harry's hair after a shower. And I will always treasure those stolen moments when I grabbed his hand and he never jerked it away, or when we hid away from teachers under the invisibility cloak. Trips to Hogsmeade when it was just him, me, and Ron, but he and I would share secret glances will always be at the top of my list of favorite memories. And of course, the time I kissed him on the cheek was indeed my first kiss. Yes, I count that as my first kiss. Oh, Harry, I think I love you. No, I know I love you. But I can't yet I wan't to so badly. Does that make me bad? Am I truly damned because of these feelings? My thoughts are interrupted as I hear the door opening and the trudging of feet that I know are muddy.

"Hermione, love, where are you?", Ron yells through the house. I can hear him walking through the corners of the old house known as the Burrow. 'Please, Ron,' I think, 'don't knock over the' - crash! - 'vase'. I sigh inwardly. I hear Ron perform a quick fixing charm, as he does everyday when he comes home. Finally, he finds me in the living room.

"Hey there, Hermione," He says with a smile. He scoops me into a hug and I remember why he is my friend. But I also remember why he is only my friend, and yet, not. The tears start up again. I try to sniff them back without him noticing, but to no avail.

"Hermione, why are you crying?", He says as he pulls out of our hug. I scramble quickly to come up with an excuse.

"Oh, you know, just thinking of an old sad story I read once," I immediately respond. Ron quickly shrugs this off - he never wants to hear about old stories.

"So, where's Hugo?", He asks, changing the subject. I roughly wipe at my eyes and point up.

"He's taking a nap. Played all day on that blasted broom you got him. Completely wore himself out," I tell Ron. Ron smiles triumphantly. I knew he knew that Hugo would love that broom. I just wish there was a seatbelt that came with it. Or a parachute. I smile slightly.

"Well, then, I invited Harry, Ginny, and some other mates from the Ministry over for dinner. You think you can work that out?", Ron added. I look up, a flame in my eyes.

"What time did you tell them?", I ask, slightly icily. Ron's expression changes.

"6:30?", He whimpers. I look over at the clock. It read six o'clock. I was gearing up for a fight, but then a small voice in the back of my head pleads me to let it go. Just let it go. So I do. I look back up at Ron, the flame gone from my eyes.

"I'll have it done," I say. Ron relaxes into a smile and walks towards me. He kisses the top of my head.

'"That's my little Mrs. Weasley," He says before walking upstairs to go lie down. This leaves me biting my quivering lip. I had strived for many things in life, but....not this. I let a few tears fall, then quickly wipe my face and start work on the dinner, with magical aid, of course.

Another voice comes into the back of my head. 'You've lost your fire, Hermione'.

I would have chosen Granger.

2. Chapter 2

Okay, here's chapter two. I'm glad you guys are liking this story so far.

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I used to live alone before I knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
But love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah.
-Jeff Buckley, Broken Hallelujah

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"....and so, in the end, I just gave him the recommendation," Ron says. Everyone chuckles slightly at the story. It is two hours into the dinner. I'm still quite dazed after managing to put together a decent meal for nine people. Harry, Ron, Ginny, Hugo, Lily, Luna, Dean, Seamus, and myself are all seated around the old table in the kitchen of the Burrow. I look around at all of them, happily enjoying their meal. Hugo and Lily are playing with the remains of their food, something I know we've all told them not to do. I scan my eyes from Hugo and Lily to Luna. My expression softens. Luna's divorce from the naturalist Rolf Scamander was open for ridicule from Witch Weekly and other useless tabloids. Their opinion was that if someone involved in the downfall of Voldemort couldn't hold together a marriage, what hope was there for the rest of them? Honestly, it was all rubbish. That lousy Scamander fellow was the one who left Luna and her two boys, not the other way around. I never did like those sleezy papers. But Luna was always welcome at Potter Manor or here at the Burrow whenever she needed help. Ron was always excited to see her. I move my eyes to Dean and Seamus. I smile. Those two were always such cards, and now, they were holding positions neatly under Harry and Ron at the Ministry. Of course, there were occassionally some problems, but that was why they weren't at the top of the Auror chain. Suddenly, something red and vibrant catches my attention. I turn my head to see Ginny Weasley (strike that, Ginny Potter) shake her head in laughter. I frown. I sometimes wish I could be like her. Her and her beauty. I'm suddenly aware of how dull I must look; fixing this dinner left me no time to attempt to wash my face or attempt to fix my bushy hair. Not that I could. I sigh. Ginny laughs again and lightly grabs Harry's arm. Oh, Harry. My gaze finally lands on him. I watch him intently as he talks away, his eyes sparkling with glee. I smile, a real, true smile. He seems so happy. Why should I even think of disrupting his life when he's finally gotten it the way he wants it? I open my mouth to sigh, but nothing happens. Harry turns his gaze to me. I look at his mouth. His lips are forming a familiar shape, although I'm paying more attention to my own thoughts. His mouth forms the familiar shape again, and it occurs to me that I've been lost in my thoughts for quite some time. I shake my head and return to the world, only to here Harry saying my name.

"Hermione," Harry said while snapping his fingers in front of my face,"Anyone home?"

I grab his hand and lower it to the table. His eyes widen for a moment, but then return to their normal size.

"Yes, Harry", I say,"I'm here. I'm home." Harry gives me a small grin and for a brief second, I forget that we're not alone. But only for a second. I let go of his hand. I notice Ginny watching us carefully out of the corning of my eye. Her hand is on in the table. It twitches. Harry notices it too. He quickly reaches back and takes her hand, though he keeps eye contact with me. Luna, God bless her soul, breaks the silence.

"You know what I've found that's interesting? Nargles don't only nest in mistletoe. They can also be found in deadly nightshade, which is quite amazing, since the plant is almost always fatal",Luna says dreamily. Ron smiles and turnes to Luna.

"Luna, where on earth do you find out these things?".He askes. Luna shrugs and smiles in return.

"Exploring, mostly. But reading up on the subject helps as well,"Luna says. There is a brief moment where Ron and Luna share a gaze, and for a short while, I feel like maybe someone understands the way I feel. But all this is interrupted by Dean and Seamus.

"Well, I guess we'll take this time to say our goodbyes for tonight. There's work tomorrow, as you all know," Dean says. Seamus nodded as he got up from his chair.

"Goodnight, kiddos", Dean says to Hugo and Lily. They get up to give Seamus and Dean hugs while Luna gets up from her chair as well.

"I think I ought to be going, too," She says. Ron looks utterly dissappointed, but smiles nonetheless. We all get up from the table, everyone going to see each other off, except for me. I wave goodbye to those who are leaving, and then I gather the dishes. As I take them to the sink, I hear the footsteps die down. I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding. I set the dishes in the sink and pull my wand out of my pocket. Starting the magic off, I wipe my brow and then turn around, only to face Harry's chest. I let out a gasp, followed by a furious blush.

"Woah, there,"He says,"I thought I'd come and help you with the dishes." I keep my gaze on the ground. I can't look at him, not now.

"I'm using magic tonight, Harry", I say. My voice sounds different; it doesn't sound like my own. Harry looks at me with an odd expression. I know what he's thinking. I usually do the dishes by hand - it reminds me of my mother. But not tonight. I'm just....too tired. Too tired of too many things. I finally gather up the courage to look at him. It is worth every ounce of it.

"I'm just tired."

"Oh, well then. I guess Ginny and I will just get out of your hair then."

"No!", I say a little too loudly, and a little too quickly. Harry raises an eyebrow, and then takes my hands in his. I inhale sharply, and he notices. He leads me to the table where we sit.

"Hermione, what's wrong?", Harry asks. I look down again. I feel my eyes slowly begin to well up with tears. I think about parchment and freshly cut grass and his hair after a shower. I think about holding his hand for all those years, and nothing ever coming of it. I think about flying on Buckbeack and holding Harry's waist and closing my eyes so tight. And I think about my name, my bloody name. I want my name, damnit. I want my name. I can't hold it in anymore, and the tears begin to flow.

Harry doesn't say anything, he simply holds me. I know Harry has never been good with crying girls, and yet, somewhere along the line, he found a way to understand. At least, to understand me, just the way that I understand him. And so, it is here we sit, holding each other, in a state of understanding.

3. Chapter 3

I'm glad that you guys are enjoying the story thus far. I can tell that you guys are really empathazing with Hermione, which is really sweet. This is kind of a filler chapter, so I apologize for that.

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If it takes my whole life
I won't break, I won't bend
It will all be worth it
Worth it in the end.
-Sarah McLachlan, Answer

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We are still sitting in each other's arms, my tears have almost gone. I finally look up from Harry's shoulder and, with great difficulty, stare steadily into his eyes. I'm aware that my eyes must be read and puffy, but I don't care anymore. Harry looks back at me with a caring expression. I smile lightly and feel a small blush coming on. Harry opens his mouth and begins to speak.

"Hermione, will you tell me what's the matter now?", He asks gently. I smile wider, and I almost begin to spill all of my problems to him. But then, I remember to whom I'm speaking. It's Harry. Harry. The man I'm truly in love with. The man who I've dedicated my life to, who I've loved for years. The man who is in love with another, who is happy, who has a family. I can't tell him what I'm feeling - it would ruin his life. It would ruin everybody's life. I have to keep this a secret. This is my burdern to bear. I turn my attention back to Harry, who is patiently waiting for a response.

"Erm....Well, I suppose I am just a little stressed out lately", I say, praying he'll buy the excuse. It certainly isn't a lie. Judging from his expression, it's clear that he knows that's not all that's going on.

"Hermione, honestly, I know you better than that. Tell me what's really going on," He pleads. I stare deep into Harry's emerald green eyes, and for a moment, just a brief moment, I share my soul with him. I think that maybe he can tell how I'm feeling, but if he does, he doesn't show it. If he does know, he wants me to tell him. I think about telling him the truth - maybe he'll understand. Just then, Ginny walks into the kitchen, already in the middle of a sentence.

".....so goodnight again, Dean, Seamus!", Ginny yells. She turns her attention to myself and Harry, "Harry, we need to take Lily home. It's getting late and she's getting tired." "No I'm not!", Lily shouts from the other room. Ginny laughs lightly, that is until she seems me cradled in Harry's arms. She stops and her expression changes. Her face becomes pointed and her eyes darker.

"What's going on," Ginny asks, attempting to mask her envy with casualty. Harry turns to Ginny, though he does not let go of me.

"Nothing is going on, Ginny. We're just talking", Harry says calmly. The expression of anger does not leave her face. I wisely decide to stay silent - this is between Harry and Ginny.

"Well then, if nothing is going on, why does it lok like you tow are in the middle of something?", Ginny asks coldly. Harry does not lose his cool, but instead responds with ease.

"Maybe it seems that way to you, but we were just talking.", Harry replies. Ginny lets out a small sigh under her breath.

"Well, no matter what you two were doing, it's getting late and we need to get going."

Harry stares at her for a moment, and then turnes to look at me. There is an apology in his eyes. I understand.

"It's okay, Harry", I whipser so only he and I can hear. Ginny stretches her neck to hear what I say, but I know she can not. Harry smiles a sweet, sad smile and lets go of me. I immediately miss his frame against mine. He gets up and follows Ginny out of the room, his hand on the small of her back. I stare longingly at that hand, wishing it were in mine. But then I remember how happy Harry must be with Ginny, and I couldn't ruin that. However, they did just have a small spat....perhaps things were not as they seemed?

It was then that Ron walked in the kitchen. He announced that he had just seen Luna off, and he looked absolutely giddy. It was no secret to me that Ron adored Luna, but what there something else behind his eyes that I had been missing? After all these years I thought I would know the answer to questions like that. But, no, I was just as in the dark as I would have been if I didn't even know Ron. I of course knew that Ron was most likely Luna's first love, and when he didn't return her affections, she ended up with that lousy Rolf Scamander. But, somehow, I don't think that Luna ever let go of Ron. Just like I'll never let go of Harry. Maybe we're not in such different positions.

Ron gains my attention, and mentions that it's getting late. He offers to put Hugo to bed while I finish off the dishes. I tell him that I'll do both, and he nods and heads off to bed. I pull my wand out of my back pocket and turn off hte magic that had been washing the dishes. They were all clean, anyway. I find Hugo in the livingroom picking up his toys. I smile. Such a good boy.

"Come on, Hugo. Time for bed," I say. He smiles up at me, and though he's older now, I see a young version of Hugo in his face. We walk up the stairs together, my hand on his shoulder. Once I get him tucked into his bed, I kiss him on the forehead, mutter a silent "nox", and leave the room.

As I get ready for bed, I reflect on today's events. I was so close to spilling my soul to Harry. I want to so badly. I want to be with him so badly. But I remember how everyone is involved, and how everyone would be hurt. I can't let that happen. I sigh and feel tears prickling. I wipe them away and lie down. I close my eyes and say a quick prayer for peace.

And then, darkness.

4. Chapter 4

Sorry for the lack of updates. I've had a tiny bit of writer's block. But, I'm back with another chapter that I hope you'll enjoy.
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But you can skyrocket away from me
And never come back if you find another galaxy
Far from here with more room to fly
Just leave me your stardust to remember you by.

Gregory and the Hawk, Boats & Birds
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I awake while Ron is getting dressed. I blink several times, adjusting my eyes to the light that is pouring in from the windows. Ron is getting ready for his job at the Ministry. I muffle a sigh. I used to have a job at the Ministry. I was moving up in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement when Ron suggested that I take a sebatacle. I was adament about staying at first, but he wore me down. I told myself that it would be a short break, and a well desrved one. But a week turned into a month, and a month turned into a year. I eventually lost my beloved place at the Ministry, though not for a lack of trying on my part. But, it was their decision that I had run my course there. I am still afraid that all of my work to protect the equality between witches and wizards of pure-blood, half-blood, and muggle-born will be lost.

"Hermione, I'm headed off to the Ministry. I'll see you this afternoon", Ron says. I look up over to him, smile, and nod. He grabs his wand and apparates to the Ministry. My smile fades as I return my gaze to the ceiling. I need to get up soon to make Hugo's breakfast. I grind my teeth for a moment and then get up. As I grab my robe and wand, like clockwork, I hear a soft knock on my bedroom door.

"Mum? Are you awake?", Hugo asks, barely audible. I smile again, genuinely this time, and head towards the door. I open it to find a sheepish looking boy staring up at me.

"Goodmorning, sweetheart", I say. Hugo gives me a hug and turns to head down to the kitchen.

"What would you like for breakfast, Hugo?", I ask once we reach the kitchen.

"Eggs and bacon, please!", Hugo responds. I nod in return and set the magic to make his food. As I sit across the table, a silence passes between us. We wait for the bacon and eggs to finish.

"Mum, when will I get to see Lily again?", Hugo asks suddennly.

"You just saw her last night", I respond.

"I know, we have so much fun together."

"Well, perhaps we'll get together with her this weekend?", I say. Hugo nods in approval. We sit in silence some more until breakfast is finished. I get up and serve Hugo and myself. It's not two seconds after I sit down that I hear a small pop in the other room. I wrap my robe tighter around me and go to see who just apparated into our house. I am surprised to see Harry standing in the middle of our living room, running a hand through his damp hair. Had he just had a shower? Damn.

"Goodmorning, Harry. What can I do for you?", I ask in my most normal of voices. He smiles and I almost melt.

"Well, Hermione, I was wondering if you and Hugo would like to accompany myself and Lily to the shops", Harry replies. It is only then that I notice that Lily is standing behind her father, smiling up at me.

"Well actually....wait a minute, shouldn't you be at work?", I ask, suddenly interested in why Harry was playing hookey.

"Heh, well, promise you won't get too defensive", Harry replies. I raise an eyebrow and crack a grin. Harry smiles wider.

"I felt you could use a vacation."

I couldn't help but laugh at this. A vacation? From what? I haven't worked in years. Harry must be pulling my leg.

"Harry, what do you mean?", I ask. Harry bends down to Lily's height and whispers something in her ear. She calls out for Hugo, to which he responds. Lily runs into the kitchen.

"Harry....what are you doing? I don't work."

"Yes you do", he replies matter-of-factly. I blink at his tone. Harry walks up to me and takes my hands in his. I feel my heart begin to beat faster.

"You cook, clean, take care of two kids, not to mention Ron and myself. Hermione, that's quite a load", Harry says. I feel myself warming at his consideration. But this is why he skipped work? The natural Hermione catches up with me.

"Harry, you can't just miss work to make me feel better. You have a family to support!"

"Hermione, please, don't worry. I took a sick day and I really want to do this with you", Harry says.

"What about Ginny?", I ask hesitantly. Harry's smile remains, but his eyes are serious.

"She's at work", he says simply. I bite my lip, then let out a sigh. I smile.

"Alright, Harry. Let's go."

Harry takes his hands out of mine. I wasn't aware that we had been holding hands this whole time. Harry and I wait for Hugo to finish his breakfast, and then he, Harry, Lily, and myself leave for the shops.

"Why can't we apparate?", Lily and Hugo whine. Harry and I roll our eyes, as if we were the children.

"Oh, you two! It's a lovely day. A nice walk never hurt anybody", I say. The two kids look at Harry and me with disdain. We simply laugh.

The day is filled with singing birds and blue skies. Fiften minutes later, we reach the shops. We ask the children which store they would like to go in first. Lily choose a quidditch shop while Hugo chooses a book store. Harry nudges me in the side at the realization that our kids are just like us. I smile. Harry quiets Lily and lets Hugo and I venture into the bookstore. Lily quickly becomes interested and follows Hugo down the endless aisles of books. Harry takes my hand. My heart flutters.

As Harry leads me to a bench outside, I begin to feel the familiar self loathing that comes with the feelings that I have for Harry. How dare I feel this way - it's innappropriate! We sit down as he realeases my hands.

"Hermione, we need to talk", Harry says seriously. I almost swallow my tongue.

"Harry..."

"Last night, something became very apparent to me."

Uh oh. Uh oh.

"I'm not happy."

Wait. What? I stare blankly at Harry, not knowing what to say. Luckily, Harry continues.

"I've been unhappy for a very, very long time. My children aren't happy. Ginny's not happy. My family is not happy. And I have a feeling that you aren't happy either."

I just nod. Every word is true.

"Why are you unhappy, Hermione?", Harry asks, his face steady. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Does he really expect me to tell him the truth? That I'm madly in love with him, and have been for years? What does he want from me? Harry takes my hand one last time. It breaks my heart to pull away.

"Harry, I...I can't", I say, looking deep into his eyes.

"Why?", he pleads. I feel my eyes fill with tears.

"For the same reason that's always been there: Ron and Ginny. Only now, Harry, it's amplified. We have families. We have lives. This is the path that we have chosen, and therefore, this is the path we have to take. Believe me, if I could go back and take it all back just to be with you, I would. I would a million times over. But, I can't, Harry. I can't. And I'm sorry for that, I swear I am. But I can't do this", I cry. Harry nods.

"I know it was a hard thing of me to ask. It's not how I wanted to be with you, but I thought if there was a chance, I should just take it", he explains. I tell him I understand. We sit in silence.

"I think I should take Hugo and go home", I say. Harry nods.

"I'll take Lily and go as well."

The children are heartbroken to be leaving so early. They say their goodbyes and right before Harry apparates to Potter Manor, we share one last look. So much is said in one glance. Then, they are gone. Hugo and I apparate home. He runs up to his room to begin reading a new book that he bought at the shop. I begin to go to my room, but stop. It doesn't feel right. I share that room with Ron. I share this whole house with Ron. I have no place of my own. So, I create one. I find a piece of paper and scribble something on it. I hug it close to my heart as I lie on the couch and begin to cry. Soon, I fall asleep, and the paper falls from my grasp. It reads: Hermione Granger.

5. Chapter 5

"For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'It might have been!'" - John Greenleaf Whittier

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"Hermione?"

I shift in my sleep. I faintly hear a voice calling my name. A dreamy, other-worldly voice.

"Oh, Hermione..."

I open my eyes and spot a yellow, blurry form stooped down in front of me. As I regain my focus, I recognize Luna's face. I smile genuinely, but with a sense of confusion.

"Hello, Luna. Erm, if you don't mind my asking, what are you doing here?"

Luna smiles widely, and her eyes almost sparkle.

"Ronald invinted me."

I squint my eyes and begin to sit up. Ron had invited her? But wasn't she here just the other night?

"I hope that's alright", Luna begins, sounding suddnely nervous. I wave my hand at her comment.

"Of course it's alright, Luna. It's just...where's Ron?", I ask. Luna smiles again, and points towards the kitchen. As she points, Ron comes walking out from the kitchen, looking utterly giddy. I narrow my eyes.

"Ah, this is the perfect day. My childhood home, one of my children here, the other at Hogwarts, and my two favorite girls in the world", Ron says in a sing-song voice.

I notice Luna tense at the last portion of his statement. I sigh inwardly, making my decision. My eyes are no longer narrow.

"What about Ginny?", I ask with a smile. Ron comes over to me and Luna and puts his arms around our shoulders.

"Well, what Ginny doesn't know won't hurt her, will it?", He replies. He turns his head towards Luna, and I notice as their eyes lock. It seems like an eternity before I distance myself from our small group.

"Luna, could I offer you some tea?", I ask, attempting to change the subject. She snaps her head in my direction and her face reddens.

"Why, yes, erm, that sounds lovely. I'll sit and wait", She replies. As she leaves Ron's grasp, I see a slight flash of sadness in his eyes, but it quickly passes.

"I'll help you, Hermione", Ron says, sudennly. I smile and nod in his direction, and we begin to walk towards the kitchen when we hear Luna's light laughter. Ron turns to look, but I continue to walk away.

"What is it, Luna?", Ron asked. I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Why, it's Hermione's name. Only, it's her old name. It says 'Hermione Granger'. Isn't that funny?", Luna says.

I stop in my tracks. At that moment, there is a large crash at the window, and I am sure Ron had thrown something. But, as I turn around, instead of a broken window, I see an elderly looking owl shaking it's head, as if to say 'ouch'. It was Luna's owl, Siren. Luna walks towards the window and opens it, letting Siren flutter inside. Luna takes a small envelope from Siren's beak, reads it, then rolls her eyes with a small smile.

"I'm so sorry to cut this visit short, but the babysitter needs some help with Lorcan and Lysander. Those two can be tyrants, I swear", Luna laughs. Siren settles on her shoulder, and Luna waves goodbye before she apparates away from the Burrow.

There is a small pause, and then Ron turns to me. I expect shouting, but instead, there is laughter.

"Hermione, you're so silly sometimes," Ron practically giggles. He picks up the paper, my paper, with my name on it.

"This isn't your name anymore, love. It's Weasley. Hermione Weasley," Ron says with a smile, "Now, doesn't that sound much better?"

He kisses me on the forehead, and turns to go to the kitchen. And then, I snap.

"NO!", I cry. Ron turns around, surprised at my sharpness.

"No, it doesn't sound better! It doesn't sound even remotely good! I am so...so tired of this! You...oh, you...you and your insisting behavior! Have you once, ever in your life, stopped to think of someone else? No! Because there is no one more important that Ron Weasley! There are none more important than the whole bloody Weasley family! You and Ginny, and your mother! Oh, your MOTHER!"

I'm rambling now, and I know I'm just making him angry. But I don't care.

"Your mother created this...this hell for me! For me and you and Harry and Ginny! She had this notion of some perfect Weasley family, some stupid, stupid idea! And she forced it on us! And my name...this whole thing...it took away my name."

I sink to the floor and wrap my head in my hands. I cry and cry and I know I've made no sense whatsoever. But then, I feel Ron kneel down beside me, and he surprises me by not retaliating. I look up at him. There is still anger in his eyes, but he's holding it back. I begin to speak.

"Don't lie to me, Ron. Don't tell me, don't tell me that now, or ever, that you are happy. That I made you happy. Because I know it's not true. And because I know I'm not happy."

He stares at me, the anger flooding from his eyes in the form of tears. I look at him, wife to husband, friend to friend, and I ask him.

"Are you happy?"

There is a small pause, and as he hangs his head, I hear him whisper his answer.

"No."

6. Chapter 6

I apologize for not updating very often. I've been focusing on my original stories at FictionPress.com. If you'd like, you can read them at fictionpress.com/~papermask. Also, this will be a short chapter, so I apologize for that, too. :)
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"Snakes in the grass beneath our feet, rain in the clouds above,
Some moments last forever, but some flare up with love love love."

- The Mountain Goats, Love Love Love
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It has been two months, and Ron has moved to a flat near Hogsmeade, of all places. A sneaky little voice in my head tells me that he resides there because it brings up memories of better times between him, me, and Harry. I sniffle a bit. I never meant to hurt him. I look down at the wedding band on my finger. I still can't decide if it's time to take it off. I know that the time will come eventually, but I'm afraid of what might happen once it does. Life has been difficult enough, imagine what a divorce would do. Especially for the children.

The children are home from Hogwarts for Christmas break. At the moment, Hugo and Rose are playing a game of exploding snap in the kitchen. I feel my eyes begin to prickle with tears. They haven't been speaking much since Ron left. I'm not entirely sure if they blame us or themselves for our current situation. They get to see Ron every few days or so, and I hope that makes them happier. Of course, James, Lily, and Albus have been there for them. Ginny is consoling Ron, and although she isn't entirely cold or distant towards me, her demeanor is different. I don't think she realises that this seperation is a decesion that Ron and I made together. In fact, I don't think she believes that Ron was part of it at all. At least Harry doesn't blame me. I sigh softly. Harry. He's tangled somewhere in this mess. I am about to end my marriage, aren't I? The answer, of course, is yes. But what is the reason? Is it because of Harry? Or are Ron and I just not working anymore? Or maybe...it's both? I free my hand from my knitting to rub my forehead. I'm giving myself a headache.

"Mum?", Rose says quietly, interrupting my thoughts. I look up at her. Her auburn hair reminds me of mine. It's bushy and curly at the same time. I'm almost tempted to smile, but then I catch sight of her eyes. Her light brown orbs are tired and visably stressed. I ache for her, knowing that she and Hugo are in pain because of me.

"Yes, sweetheart?", I reply, attempting to keep the sadness out of my voice. She slightly tilts her head to the side, but carries on.

"Uncle Harry is here", she says matter-of-factly. I raise my eyebrows and set my knitting work on the side table.

"Harry? He's here - right now?", I ask, absentmindedly matting down my wild hair. I can swear Rose smiles, but if she does, she hides it well. She nods her head.

"Well then...erm...I suppose we'll talk to him, won't we?", I say stupidly. Rose nods again. We wait in silence for a moment.

"Erm...where is he?", I ask. Rose points to the kitchen. I finally get up and follow her out of the living room. When we enter the kitchen, I see Harry sitting at the table across from Hugo. They are playing an unusually quiet game of exploding snap. When Harry hears us enter, he turns around in his chair and flashes that smile, and I feel my knees shake. As I grab hold of the back of his chair so I won't fall, I attempt a nonchalant approach at speaking.

"Hello there, Harry. What brings you here?", I ask. There is a silence when we stare at each other, his smile widening, me biting down harder on my lip. Suddenly, he speaks to Rose.

"Rose, I hope you'll forgive me, but I seemed to have taken over your part of this game of exploding snap. Why don't you take it back?", Harry asks kindly. He rises from his chair and lets Rose take his place.

As my children continue the game, I feel a slight tug on my hand. I look up to Harry who smiles again, and pulls me into the living room. We sit on the couch, facing each other. My heart is beating faster and faster. Harry lets go of my hand and begins to speak.

"How are you doing, Hermione?", he asks. It is a simple question, really, but I just don't know how to answer it. Should I just tell him I'm fine, or tell him the truth? Or maybe-

"Hermione, really, it's okay. Just tell me", Harry says, interrupting my thoughts. He takes my hand and I can't look at him without crying. I want to hug him, kiss him, love him, but I can't. I can't. I begin to take sharp breaths. I feel like there's a massive pressure on my chest, and I'm not able to breathe. At first, Harry seems surprised, but then he just holds me. I feel safe and loved in his embrace, emotions that I haven't felt in a very long time. Warm tears begin to spill down my cheeks, and I feel embarrassed for crying in front of him. Finally, I get myself under control. He pulls me up and looks me in the eye, and smiles. I can't help but smile a little in return.

"Hermione, come stay with me", he says. I feel the color drain from my face. Harry continues anyway.

"Look, it's the holidays, almost Christmas, and the children love being together. Plus, you clearly need a break from all of this. Perhaps a change in scenery", he says with a smile. I'm not convinced.

"What about Ginny?", I ask timidly. Harry makes a fine line with his lips.

"Ginny will live", he replies. I bite my lip, but then laugh a little. Perhaps a change of scenery is in order. I nod my head in approval. Harry smiles wider and hugs me. Later, I inform Rose and Hugo that we would be staying with Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny. They seem excited enough and run to pack their belongings. As we get ready to leave, I quickly gather up my knitting project. I follow Harry, Rose, and Hugo, leaving my wedding band behind on the kitchen table.

7. Chapter 7

Okay, I know it's been far too long since my last update. Life has just been getting in the way. But, I'm here with another chapter, so hopefully, it's all good. :)

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"Take this sinking boat and point it home,
We've still got time,
Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice,
You'll make it now."

Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova - Falling Slowly

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It has been a week since Harry invited Rose, Hugo, and I to stay with him. It seems like it's been ages since I've been to Harry's home. I had almost forgotten how large it was. I know it's not something that Harry particularly enjoys, but Ginny seems to like it well enough. I suppose after growing up in a cramped house like the Burrow, a house with space would be ideal. We're all enjoying ourselves, though. However, things still seem to be tense with Ginny. Of course, she doesn't show it in front of the children. Not much, anyway. I remember when we first arrived.

Harry, Rose, Hugo, and I apparate into the kitchen of Harry's home. Rose and Hugo run to find their cousins, leaving Harry and I alone. He smiles at me and I return the favor. Suddenly, I hear Ginny's voice.

"Rose? Hugo? What are you doing here?", she says in a surprised tone. Before my children can answer, Harry pulls me out into the den. The look on Ginny's face is of immediate distate, but it soon relaxes into a false smile. She walks over to us and kisses Harry on the cheek.

"Hello, darling. And hello to you, Hermione," Ginny says flawlessly. I force a smile and quickly nod my head.

"Hello, Ginny," I respond. She gives me a quick look over, most likely internally addressing the fact that she out-dresses me almost every time we see each other. After a moment, I glance up at Harry, who's eyes had gone quite dark. Ginny doesn't seem to notice. She turns and walks back over to the large couch and takes a seat, picking up a copy of Witch Weekly in the process.

"So, what's the news?", Ginny asks casually while leafing through the magazine. Harry jumps in without caution.

"Hermione, Hugo, and Rose are going to be staying with us throughout the Christmas break," he says matter-of-factly. Ginny tenses, but does not look up from the magazine. I feel my eyebrows raise. I didn't know he had intended for us to stay that long.

"Oh?", Ginny responds, pretending that she isn't angry.

"Yes," Harry says, "I've already invited them, and they have all the belongings that they will need."

"Alright, alright," Ginny begins, "I'm not protesting. It just would have been nice if you had clued me in on this little surprise."

She flashes us a perfect smile, and continues to turn the pages of her magazine. After a moment, Harry turns to me, his eyes clear once more.

"Why don't we go see what the kids are up to?", he asks genuinely. I nod, taking my chance to get away from Ginny.

They fought pretty viciously that night. I remember hearing it for a few mintues before Harry cast a silencing charm over their room. I also remember hoping that none of the children had heard them. Suddenly, I am brought out of my thoughts by a knock on the door. I realize that it is still morning, and that I am still in bed. I pull myself up to answer the door and find Hugo and Lily on the other side.

"Mummy, it's time for breakfast. We're all waiting," Hugo says. I feel the corners of my mouth tug into a smile.

"Alright, sweetheart, I'll be down in a minute. You two go ahead, okay?", I reply. They both grin, nod their heads, and run down the hall. I turn back into my room and quickly throw on purple shirt along with a simple black skirt. 'It's only for breakfast', I think. Once I'm finished, I head downstairs.

As I walk into the kitchen, a wonderful smell hits me. 'Harry cooked this morning', I think. I sit down at the table next to James and Rose. A smile crawls across my face as Harry begins to serve everyone. He is wearing an apron and is wearing a smile wider than the Thames. After serving everybody, Harry takes a seat. Suddenly, I notice the absence of fiery red.

"Where's Ginny?", I ask curiously.

"She went out," Harry says, "She said she'd be back later."

I furrow my eyebrows. It seems strange that she would willingly leave Harry and myself alone on purpose. I try to shrug the thought off and enjoy breakfast, but for some reason, I can't shake the thought.

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Okay, so mostly filler, but the next chapter should be better. Thank you all for reading!

8. Chapter 8

I know, I know, I'm terrible for not updating sooner. I hope this chapter helps. By the way, this chapter has some Ginny-bashing, but it's basically because Hermione finally gets to vent her frustrations. I hope it doesn't offend anybody. :)

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"It's the wrong time
For somebody new.
It's a small crime,
And I've got no excuse."
Damien Rice - 9 Crimes

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"Go after him, Albus!", Lily cries from the ground. She and Hugo are watching as Rose, Albus, and James play a makeshift game of Quidditch. They are all urging Albus to charge after James before he scores another goal. Albus eventually flies towards James, only to be cut off by Rose.

"Don't be too rough," I warn out of concern. Harry laughs and plops down in the patio chair next to mine.

"Let them have some fun, Hermione", he teases as I smile and swat my arm at him. Harry catches my hand with his. My heart skips a beat, but I quickly regain my cool. We let our arms swing together between the two chairs. I let out a peaceful sigh, and watch the children play. We are all at ease, and, for the first time in years, I truly feel at home.

The rest of the day is spent with games, laughter, and relaxation. Teddy even uses the floo network to inform Harry, the children, and me that we are all invited to join him at the shops for a day out. Harry and I decline, but happily send the kids along, with the assurance that they would all stick together.

Eventually, I let my tense feelings about Ginny melt away. Perhaps she simply wants some time to herself. That's certainly understandable - children will do that to a person. I let out a small sigh as I bend over to pick up toys and clothing that have been strewn about the house. Oddly enough, cleaning up my kids' mess is comforting. It lets me know that they are growing up normally, despite the troubles between Ron and me. It lets me know that they are going to be okay. As I begin to fold some of the rogue clothing, I hear a familiar voice.

"You know, Hermione, I brought you here so you could relax," Harry says playfully. I turn around, one of Hugo's sweaters in my hand.

"I am relaxing! I just want your home to remain spotless while I do so," I laugh back. Harry rolls his eyes and smiles as I fold the sweater and place it on the couch. He walks towards me, his hands in his pockets. Suddenly, the air grows strangely serious.

"I really am glad that you're here, you know," he says gently. I feel my breathing grow slower while my heart beats faster.

"I'm glad I'm here, too," I manage to whisper. There is a moment without words when all I can manage to do is stare into Harry's eyes. He opens his mouth, but before he can utter a word, we hear the front door slam. Suddenly, Ron's screaming pierces the broken silence.

"Where is he? Where is that bastard? I'm going to kill him, I swear, I'm going to kill him!", Ron yells as he stumbles into the den. He eyes me carefully - I can tell that he's drunk. Ron turns his attention to Harry and lets out a gurgled scream.

"How could you? You knew I loved her, you bastard! She was my wife - my wife ! And you stole her from me, just like you took everything else! You lied to me, Harry, you said she was like your bloody sister! You lied and you stole her from me! Damn you!", Ron yells.

"Ron, please, calm down!", I say shakily. Ron doesn't even spare me a glance before drawing his wand and pointing it in my Harry's direction. I gasp, run to Ron, and forcibly lower his hand. Harry remains silent.

"Stop, please, just stop!", I whisper forcefully. He looks at me, and I can tell that he's been crying. His eyes are puffy and red, and tear stains coat his cheeks.

"How could you do this to me, Hermione? I thought we...I thought you loved me," Ron whimpers. I feel tears spill onto my cheeks.

"Ron, I...I am so sorry, but we talked about this...you even said that you weren't happy!", I cry. Ron begins to shake his head vigorously.

"No no no no! That's not what I'm talking about, and you know it!", Ron yells. I start to take deeper breaths while I look between Ron and Harry, feeling the tugs of them both.

"Ron, what are you talking about?", Harry says, trying to remain calm. Ron shoots Harry one of the darkest looks I've ever seen.

"You have no right to even speak to me! Neither of you! Hermione, you cheated on me with him! We were married - did that mean nothing to you?", Ron says, obviously feeling defeated. I look at Ron with complete disbelief.

"Ron, how could you even think that? I never - never - cheated on you! Not with Harry or anybody!", I say loudly. Ron rolls his eyes and almost stumbles over.

"Don't lie to me, Hermione! Ginny told me everything!", he shouts. Suddenly, Harry and I look across the hall only to find Ginny leaning against the doorway, her arms crossed. Her eyes are fearful, yet her mouth is curved into a victorious smirk. Harry breaks the silence.

"Ginny, what did you tell him?", he yells roughly.

"Only the truth!", Ginny retorts, "It's been obvious this whole week that you and Hermione have been having an affair!"

I look at Ginny as if I've never seen her before. I've always known that she jumps to conclusions without thinking them through, but this is beyond what I would expect from her. What's worse is that I think that she actually believes her lies.

"Ginny, why are you saying this? You know we would never...could never-," I start before she cuts me off.

"Oh don't play that game, Her-my-oh-nee! No one buys your clueless act. After all, you are too smart for that, aren't you?", Ginny says viciously.

"Don't talk to me that way, Ginevra," I reply. I surprise myself with the coarseness of my tone. Ginny looks taken aback, if only for a moment.

"Look at you! You come into my home after having an affair with my husband and you just expect everyone to fall to their knees for you! You've no idea what kind of pain you've caused! You could never know!", she screams. Suddenly, I feel a rush of anger. A huge amount of anger. Every ounce of pain that I've held back in my entire life seems to rush forward, begging me to release it. Ron has gone silent, and Harry opens his mouth to respond to Ginny. I beat him to it.

"Pain? You're actually suggesting that I don't know pain? How dare you even think something like that! I'll tell you about pain. The pain of finally finding your place in the world with two wonderful friends, only to learn right off the bat that one of them has a psychopathic monster who wants to kill him! The pain of watching him grow up with that stress and worry while he only has a small amount of people who actually care about him. How about going through your entire teenage years fighting a dark force that wants you and everyone like you dead? Or, if that doesn't suit you, how about not being able to even discuss it with your parents in fear that they won't let you help your two friends - you're only friends - defend themselves when you fear they won't be able to do it alone! Or, how about having to move your parents completely across the earth and blocking their memories of you! Or, and here's the best part, little Ginny, watching the boy you love grow into a wonderful person who doesn't ever recognize that you've loved him for years. Instead, he goes for someone as van, obnoxious, and vapid as you! And finally, in the end, imagine yourself settling for a lifestyle you'd never thought you would have, knowing all the while that you can't make the man who loves you happy and that you can't be happy with the man you love.I have never cheated with Harry, but I've know pain, Ginny. The kind that only Harry, Ron, and I share. So don't you dare presume to tell me that I don't know pain!", I shout, no longer caring about my secrets, no longer feeling the need to harbour them. For the first time in years, I feel relieved and charged. I feel vindicated. I feel free. I am Hermione Granger, and I am free.

There is a long pause where nobody says anything. Ron seems more hurt now than before, if that's possible. Harry looks stunned beyond all reason, and Ginny is clearly fuming. But all I can do is take one deep breath after another. After a moment of looking between Harry and myself, Ginny speaks.

"Harry, aren't you going to say anything? Aren't you going to defend me?", she yells. Harry turns to look at me.

"Ginny, I think you've done enough," he replies.

"Me? I've done enough? Harry, I'm your wife!", she says roughly.

When she gets no response, Ginny turns to Ron. When he can't meet her gaze, she turns a deep shade of red.

"Fine. You want my husband?", Ginny says, turning her attention back to me, "You want Harry? You've got him!"

Suddenly, there is a loud pop, and Ginny is gone. I turn to look at my two best friends, the only ones that I've ever had. Ron is holding his head between his hands. I feel my face fall. I wish that I could help him, but I have a feeling that I'm the last person he wants to talk to. Harry, on the other hand, catches my attention. He's staring at me, his expression unreadable. All I can do is stare back and hope with everything that I have that he doesn't hate me.

9. Chapter 9

Thank you all who continue to read and stick with this story. :)

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Well all I really wanna do is love you.
A kind much closer than friends use,
But I still can't say it after all we've been through.

-If It Kills Me - Jason Mraz

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I avert my eyes from Harry's. I'm too afraid of what I might see in them. Instead, I try to focus on the drunken Ron on Harry's couch. I take a tentative step towards his shaking frame. Although he's trying to hide it, I can tell that he is still weeping.

"Ron...", I start, "You have to believe us. We never had an affair - what Ginny said was a lie."

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Harry move closer. He pauses for a moment, and then sits next to Ron. Ron does not move away. They stay like that for a while, neither one saying a word. Then, Harry speaks up.

"Ron, you're my best mate. You must know that I would never do that to you," he says honestly. Ron keeps his head resting in his hands, but speaks nonetheless.

"I know," he whispers, "I think I knew all along. I just...wanted to believe that there was something behind all of...this."

Ron waves his hand towards Harry, himself, and me. For the first time since Ginny apparated away, I meet Harry's eyes. He is staring at me with both compassion and conviction. I feel my breath catch in my throat, but I quickly recover. I kneel on the floor beside Ron. All three of us remain quiet for some time, both respecting and fearing the silence that has overtaken us. I can't stop the memories of our past from rushing through my mind. Every year at Hogwarts, every trip to Hogsmeade or Diagon Alley. Every single moment hat has transpired between the three of us flashes through my head. All of our laughing and fighting, our talking and comfortable silences. And now, now we can barely speak when all three of us are together. When had everything changed?

"What happened to us?", I whisper. Ron finally looks up from his hands, while Harry turns his head towards me. They both share the same expression I know is covering my face as well. We all feel loss.

"Why does everything have to be so different?", I ask, tears prickling at my eyes, "Our bond used to be so strong."

There is a short pause before Ron speaks out.

"It still is," he says, wiping at his tear-stained cheeks. Ron looks at me, nods his head, and then takes a gentle hold onto my arm. He does the same to Harry, and then pulls the both of us into a large hug. At first, I am somewhat stunned - it isn't like Ron to be so openly affectionate. From the way he is tensing, I can tell Harry is thinking the same thing.

"You two are my best mates. I'm so sorry for believing what Ginny said. I...I don't know what else to say...,"Ron begins, stumbling over his words. Harry cuts him off.

"Ron, it's okay," he says. Ron looks at me, and I nod my head in agreement. I take a good look at his face. His eyes are tired and bloodshot. I see just how much the lie has hurt him. Suddenly, Ron lets Harry and me go, and stands up shakily.

"I need to go," he says firmly. I look anxiously at Harry.

"Where are you going?", he asks. Ron looks at the both of us, then speaks.

"Home," he says quietly. Ron spares me one last glance, and turns to go.

"Harry, do you have any pepperup potions?", I ask quickly. He nods and retreats to the kitchen. There is a silence between Ron and myself that proves to us that any spark that might have existed between us at some small moment has long since died out. Harry returns with the potion, which Ron drinks quickly. He ignores the steady flow of steam that comes out of his ears as a result of the potion. Ron doesn't take another look at us before apparating away.

Harry and I stand there, looking at the place where Ron once stood. Suddenly, the fear of Harry's reaction to my previous outburst creeps back into my heart. I keep my back turned to him as I start to speak.

"Harry...about what I said before - I know that it wasn't what you were expecting, but it... it is the truth," I begin. Suddenly, I feel his presence behind me, but before I have the chance to react, I feel Harry's hands on my waist, turning me around to face him. I only have a second to steal a glance at his eyes before he is kissing me, hard, his hands slowly becoming entangled in my hair. My arms circle around his neck. I am losing myself in the utter surprise of the moment. Harry backs me up against the wall, and I feel my left leg grip him around his waist.

"Harry...," I murmur without really thinking. He responds by trailing the side of my mouth and down my neck with kisses. I open my eyes in surprise when he tugs at my ear with his teeth.

"Hermione...," he whispers. It is the first time that I have heard him say my name with such... loving passion. I pull his head from my neck, my hands on his cheeks, and I kiss him as hard and full as I know how. Harry picks me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist. We stumble into one of the extra downstairs bedrooms. Harry gently lays me onto the bed, closing the door with his foot. I grab my wand from the back pocket of my skirt and mumble a silencing charm, then set it on the bedside table. Suddenly, Harry stops. He is looking at me, just looking at me. I feel a blush coming onto my cheeks.

"Is...is everything okay?", I ask timidly. Harry smiles that goofy grin that makes my heart melt.

"Everything is perfect. You're perfect. I'm just admiring you're perfectness," he replies with a laugh. I feel my face relax into a smile, and I reach for Harry's hand. He gladly puts his hand in mine and climbs onto the bed, looming over me. I loop an arm over his neck and pull him down to kiss me. He does so happily. I can feel the kiss intensifying, and I can also feel Harry's hands under my shirt. I quickly pull it over my head, causing my bushy hair to fall to one side. Harry entwines his right hand in my hair and places his left hand on my breast. He kisses me once more, and I arch my back.

"Hermione, you're amazing," he says. I let out a quick breath.

"Say it again."

"You're amazing."

"No, no," I reply, "Say my name again." I feel Harry smile against my lips.

"Hermione...Hermione...Hermione," he says. I can feel freedom. I feel the love that I've held for Harry for so long overflow inside me. I turn my head as Harry kisses my neck. His left hand comes into view, and the ring that is on his finger catches the light. Suddenly, the freedom inside me feels like it is being ripped away.

"Wait," I blurt out. Harry stops instantly, and looks me in the eye.

"What, what is it? Is something wrong?", he asks gently. My heart breaks.

"No...well, yes. You...you're married, Harry," I say quietly. His gaze moves from my face to his wedding ring. He curses, sits up on the bed, and runs his hand through his hair. I slowly sit up, and tentatively place a hand on his shoulder. He does not move away, but instead, places his hand on mine.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted you," he says.

"I'm sorry-"

"No, no! It's not that. You're right, after all. I just...I've loved you for so long, Hermione," Harry says. I give him a small smile, and kiss him on the cheek.

"I love you, too, Harry. So very much," I say. He returns the smile, and for a brief moment, we are still together. No longer dancing around our emotions, no longer catering to others. We are simply us. Harry and Hermione, Hermione and Harry. And for now, that's all we need.