Comforting You by Ravenclaw's heir Rating: PG13 Genres: Drama, Romance Relationships: Harry & Hermione Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 7 Published: 25/04/2009 Last Updated: 30/05/2009 Status: Completed Hermione's crushed by the loss of her parents, and the person she thought would help her go through it has turned their back on her. But there's one person she can always count on, and in more ways than she thought. It starts after the battle at Hogwarts but ignores the epilogue. The final chapter's up! 1. It's a gloomy day -------------------- **A/N:** Hello everyone, this is the first time that I publish something here, though I've been on this site for quite a while now. This was supposed to be a one-shot, but it became longer than expected so it's a mini story I guess. I hope you enjoy it, at first it's kind of sad but it gets happier, or so I think. The chapter is short, but I thought it would be best to stop at that. The story's almost finished, but I will be posting one chapter per week, as I study and I have a lot of catching up to do. Please leave a review to tell me what you think. Happy reading! Oh, and many thanks to magicalkira for reading this first and to -gal-texter for bearing with me and helping me out to become an author. Really, I appreciate it. **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, etc. I have no intent on making money out of this, just a way of releasing some stress. -- There's a fine line between life and death, and Hermione Granger knew it very well. Losing her parents was the worst thing that could have happened to her. And to make matters worse, Ron was not talking to her. After all they've been through together, after that kiss… Hermione thought they would finally be together, and that he'd be with her the moment she needed him the most. But after Fred dying he had shut himself off, and ever since he hadn't been the same. She understood he must be grieving, and at first she had given him enough space, but when her parents died she sought a comforting hand, and it wasn't Ron the one who gave her that. “Hey, you there?” asked a voice that took her out of her reverie. “Yeah, sorry, I just… lost track of… well, everything,” she said lamely, staring into space. “I'm sorry Ron didn't come,” he said squeezing her hand gently. “I'm sorry I made you come, I know you wanted to rest,” Hermione replied back. “You're kidding me? I wouldn't want to be anywhere else,” he simply said. Hermione finally focused on him. His green eyes shone with concern, his black bangs hiding his eyebrows that were most probably upwards in a quizzical expression. She smiled at him, knowing that she could always count on him whenever she needed it. “Are you ready to go?” Harry asked as he gave her hand another squeeze. They had been sitting next to Hermione's parents' graves for what seemed like hours, but never once had he complained about it. Hermione smiled inwardly, feeling really thankful to have Harry as a companion the day she had buried her parents. “Not quite yet,” she mumbled and Harry understood. It pained her to know her parents were gone for good, but what pained her the most was that they died not knowing they had a daughter. When the war was officially over and they had paid their respects to the departed, Hermione thought it safe to go look for her parents. What she didn't know was that she was being followed. As soon as she got to Australia she went to look for them, but she wasn't quite ready to burst into their new lives, so the first day she just watched them in secret, enjoying how happy and carefree they looked, without worrying about a daughter who had kept so many things about her world from them. She left that night thinking to herself a way to walk into their lives in a slow pace so as not to scare them. That was her mistake. They didn't make it through the night. Early the next morning, when she went to their practice for an “appointment” she found out they had been murdered the night before. She didn't forgive herself for that, and she thought she never would. “It wasn't your fault,” Harry's voice broke into her thoughts. She blinked, focusing her eyes on him, a surprised look on her face. How did he know what she was thinking? “It wasn't your fault,” he repeated more firmly. “It was that death eater's fault, you couldn't know.” The death eater's identity remained unknown to Hermione, and it always would. She'd sworn that when she found them she'd kill them, but Harry got to them first. He handed the person to the Aurors before Hermione could get her hands on them, and their trial was top secret. No one knew who killed the Grangers except the prosecutor and Harry. At first she hadn't forgiven him for keeping this from her but later he made her understand that if she killed them, her life would be ruined, and that person's life wasn't worthy of it. Harry didn't want her to become a murderer; her parents wouldn't have wanted that. “I know, but I should've been more careful,” she said, tears prickling her eyes. “You thought it was safe, now that Voldemort was gone… I thought the same.” “It's different, I should've thought of it, I always think two steps ahead, remember?” she said bitterly. “But you didn't this time, because you're human, and you were eager to see them.” “I'm so stupid… “Don't,” Harry said, taking her by the arms to spin her towards him. “You're human, and that's just it. Remember you told me not to blame myself for Sirius's death? Now I'm telling you the same.” “That was different.” “How's it different?” “I… I don't know,” she answered and broke down in front of him. She hadn't cried once since she'd found out about it. She had been strong, even when the Australian authorities at first had refused to give her back her parents' bodies. She hadn't cried when she saw their lifeless forms at the morgue, nor did she cry when they were descending in their coffins 3 feet underground. But she hadn't cried because it had been surreal, all of it, the proof of who they really were and what she was to them, their transportation, their funeral. It seemed like something out of this world, *her* world, but now, with Harry shaking her and telling her it's not her fault, it all became too much. “Oh God,” she choked on her sobs as Harry pulled her to him and hugged her tightly. She couldn't believe this was happening, her parents, gone, and there was nothing she could do about it. No spell, no incantation, no hocus pocus like they so fondly called it, would bring them back. “I'm so sorry,” Harry murmured in her ear as he gently rubbed circles on her back. She tightened her grip on him, clad iron, but he didn't complain. She cried out all the pain she felt inside, and at some point, tired and full of remorse, she fell asleep in his arms. Harry waited until her breathing evened before he Disapparated them both in the blink of an eye. -- Hermione stirred and lay motionless in bed. She didn't recognize her surroundings but she knew she was safe; she had been with Harry after all. Slowly, she got up and left the nicely decorated bedroom, still clad in her black clothes. She softly padded the carpet making her way down the small hall and at its end she came to a small living room. It too was decorated to the last detail, and the soft glow that was emanating from the fireplace gave the place a cozy feeling. At the left the curtains were drawn from what most probably was the balcony, and to the right there was a closed door, most presumably the kitchen. She made her way over there and in one swift motion opened the door. Harry looked up from the table and smiled at her. “I'm glad you're awake, I was about to call the National Guard,” he teased as he got up to retrieve some food for her. He was dressed in jeans and a blue shirt. “How long have I been out?” she asked as she sat down directly across from where Harry had been. “A day, I think, a little bit more, I kind of lost track of time,” he commented as he put the plate in front of her. “No wonder I'm so hungry,” she joked and immediately froze. “It's okay to have a laugh, you know?” Harry said, resuming his seat in front of her. Hermione looked down, ashamed. “You don't have to be sad all the time, they wouldn't want that.” “What do you know? You didn't even know them,” she spat angrily and regretted it right away. “I'm sorry Harry, it's just… “It's okay,” he interrupted gently, moving his hand across the table and covering hers with it. Hermione felt guiltier. “Seriously, don't worry. If I understand one thing, it's not having parents,” he simply said, and added in a lower voice: “and I know it's harder for you since you actually shared your life with them.” “Thanks,” Hermione said in a teary voice, touched by his behavior. “What are friends for?” he said with a small smile and removed his hand from hers. She suddenly missed its warmth. “Now dig in!” he chipped happily as he continued to devour his half forgotten lunch/dinner. “What time is it?” Hermione asked as she started to eat. She felt herself coming alive with the first bite. “It is 7pm,” Harry replied casually. *Had she slept that much?* “Wow, it's late… where are we anyway?” At this Harry had the decency to blush. “Well, it's my place, and yours, it's… ours,” he finished lamely. “Ours?” Hermione repeated, confused. “Yeah, well, you see… you were really out yesterday, and I didn't think it would be proper to leave you at your, er… home, so I brought you to mine.” “You're telling me this place is yours?” Hermione asked in disbelief, momentarily forgetting the burden that had been on her shoulders the last few days. “Yes, the day after defeating Voldemort I didn't have a place to go, you know, with everyone grieving their own, and you were off to… well, I didn't want to stay in Hogwarts, so I just walked in muggle London and saw this ad… I came to check it out and it was already furnished so I said what the heck? And I bought it.” Harry fidgeted nervously under her gaze. For a moment she didn't know what to say, and finally she found her voice. “So… this *is* yours.” “Yes, and it's yours whenever you want to come. What I mean to say is… I have two spare bedrooms so you'll always have a place to stay whenever you don't want to be at your place,” he said quickly. For the first time since she could remember, Hermione broke into a grin. “Wow Harry, that's so… generous. Thank you,” she said sincerely. Harry's hesitance disappeared and he grinned too. “What's mine is yours.” He smiled. Hermione got up from her seat, circled the table and hugged Harry tightly. “You're so sweet,” she mumbled against his hair and Harry just shrugged, patting her lightly on the back, clearly flustered. “It's nothing, really… “No Harry…” Hermione interrupted, sitting this time next to him and taking his hand between hers. “This is… this means so much to me; I don't even know how to thank you properly.” “You already have.” It escaped Harry's lips before he could stop himself. He blushed, embarrassed, but Hermione couldn't help but smile, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. She was deeply touched. “And who's the other room for?” she asked, trying to make him less uncomfortable. “Well, Teddy, I want to be a part of his life, so… but I need to decorate his room properly, and I need your help.” “Sounds like a plan,” Hermione said, seeing for the first time that, even though her parents weren't with her anymore, her future wasn't as dark after all. --> 2. Snap ------- **A/N:** Hi everyone, I just want to thank you so much for being so great, I'm so happy with the response I got from the first chapter. I hope I won't let you down with this or any of the future chapters. Anyway, I hope you like it, and I'm sorry if there are many grammar mistakes, I have no beta so… Enjoy and don't forget to leave your comment! **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, etc. I have no intent on making money out of this, just a way of releasing some stress. -- Hermione stared at the empty bed for what seemed like an eternity. Harry was somewhere next to her but she couldn't pinpoint where exactly; all her attention was focused on the object in front of her. She had stayed a couple of weeks with Harry, scared to go to her own place, but she knew better than anyone that the time would come when she had to face her reality, and even though Harry's place was a nice escape to it all, she couldn't put it off anymore. So here she was, in her parents' bedroom, staring at the bed that for years had been used by them. Harry's hand came into her shoulder. “How are you feeling?” he asked softly, barely above a whisper. “I don't, I don't know… empty,” she replied sincerely. Slowly she made her way to the bed and sat on it, feeling it inching downwards because of her. “When I was younger I used to come here at nights whenever I had a nightmare, and I would make my way between them,” she reminisced as tears made their way down her face. Harry hesitated but then sat down next to her. “My dad would always complain that this bed wasn't made for three people, but my mom would say that there was always room for me,” she hiccupped. “Sounds like she had you spoiled,” Harry said and Hermione smiled through her tears. “What am I supposed to do with such a big house? I can't live here on my own, but I can't sell it, it has so many memories,” Hermione said, looking around the place. “You could always move in with me,” Harry implied. Hermione shook her head. “No Harry, as much as I like to live with you, I need to face this alone.” “You'll never be alone,” he mentioned. “I know, but I need to be, for a while… it's terrifying, but I need to do it.” “Then buy yourself a place, or, you could always go to Hogwarts, McGonagall told me they would re-open it for September.” “I don't think I'm going back to Hogwarts… “What?” Harry asked in disbelief. “I'm not going back. I know everyone thought I was going to finish my last school year, and for a while I thought about it too, but I don't want to… I can't go back,” Hermione said sadly. “Why not?” “I don't feel like it's my place anymore, I don't know Harry… I just… But both of them stopped talking when they heard a noise. Immediately Harry got up and pulled out his wand. Hermione mimicked his actions. “What was that?” said Harry in a wary tone. Hermione shook her head. “I don't know, let's go and see.” “Stay here, I'll go.” “Don't be ridiculous, I'll go as well… “Really, there's no need… Their discussion ended when they heard the stairs creaking under someone's weight. Harry unconsciously put himself in front of Hermione, wand at the ready. The seconds passed by but nothing happened. They both had their wands pointed at the front door but no one came from it. Harry and Hermione shared a look. “I could've sworn… “Hermione?” came a voice from outside that made them both jump. The above-mentioned glanced sideways at Harry, confusion etched in her face for a second. The person outside called on her again. “Who's that?” Harry whispered but Hermione made a hand gesture to keep him quiet. She walked to the door and ignored the *what are you doing* whisper Harry sent her. She stepped outside of the room. “Ron?” “What are you doing here? No… how did you know I was here?” Hermione said in disbelief. Ron was the last person she thought she would see those days. “I…” he mumbled and looked behind her. Harry was just under the doorframe staring at him. “Oh, *you* told him,” Hermione said to Harry in an accusatory tone. He shrugged but didn't look sorry at all. “How are you?” Ron said, trying to get her attention back to him. She glared at him. “How do you think I am? I just lost my parents three weeks ago! And you have the nerve to show up only now?!” she asked with incredulity. She felt her blood boiling in her veins, and the fact that Ron didn't seem to feel bad about her made her feel ready to explode. “I'm sorry.” “That's all you have to say?” This is unbelievable! Get out!” “What?” Ron said astonished. “I said get out, I don't want you here.” “But Hermione… “OUT,” she shouted, her face flushing in the blink of an eye. “I think you better leave,” Harry said quietly, standing next to her. “But mate, you told me to… “I think now it's not the time,” he replied. “You think? You *think*?” Hermione was fuming now. All she could see was red. “Ron, go!” Harry commanded, looking at Hermione with an alarmed expression. “I'll come back.” “Leave!” she shrieked and Ron ran down the stairs. “Hermione, calm down,” Harry tried to come close to her but she took a step back. “How could you? Of all the places you chose my parents' house to reunite us?” Hermione screeched. She was livid, the image of Ron clouding up her judgment even further. “I'm sorry, I thought you'd like to have him here… “You thought wrong!” she interrupted him harshly. “Hermione, I… “Leave,” she said somewhat calmly, trying to control the spasms cursing through her body. “What?” Harry blinked in surprise. Had he heard her right? “Leave Harry,” Hermione repeated more firmly without shouting. “But, Hermione… “Please…” she said, clenching her fists to try to control her anger, “I need to be alone.” Harry looked at her, hurt evident in his face, but he didn't say anything else. He walked down the stairs and out of sight. She heard a crack indicating he had Disapparated out of the house. Slowly, she made her way to her parents' room and she tumbled down in the bed, anguish sobs escaping her lips as she screamed in frustration. -- “Thank you for coming Luna,” Hermione said as she drank from her coffee. She had chosen a muggle coffee shop and had asked her old schoolmate to join her. It had been a month since the ghastly attempt at a reunion at her house. She hadn't talked to Harry ever since. Hermione felt guilty about the way she treated Harry but she had been so mad that he had told Ron to come over. She couldn't understand how he'd done such a thing, but after reflecting over things she thought he'd thought that's what she needed at the moment. Still, he had no right to bring him over to such a sacred place… She had stayed all that month at her house, coping with the fact that she was all alone now and that's how things would be from now on. Her family contacted her and she was glad they'd done it, she'd completely forgotten about them in her own grief and hadn't realized they were going through the same thing. It was a nice way to move on, being with people who shared the same pain she was feeling. But as nice as it was being with her family, Hermione felt she needed some contact with the wizarding world, and since she wasn't on speaking terms with either of her friends, the only person that came to mind was Luna. The girl smiled warmly at Hermione as she sat down in front of her and raised her hand to call the waiter. "I'm glad you contacted me Hermione, I was worried about you," the blond girl said. "Yes, well... I didn't know who else to talk to." "And you thought about me? That's so sweet!" Luna beamed. Hermione smiled, Luna was such a positive person. "But really, how are you? I found out about your parents and I'm so sorry. I sent you a letter and the Quibbler's edition for the month," the girl continued. "Yes, I got them, but I didn't feel in the position to reply to anyone," Hermione said. "Oh well, at least tell me you read the magazine," Luna said. Hermione looked away; she had always thought the magazine was kind of ridiculous, but telling that to Luna was and awful thing to say. "I haven't really had the time to read, I've been with my family and looking for a place to live, so... "Oh right! How's that going? Did you find a place that suits you?" Luna asked eagerly. "I was... I was thinking on going to college," Hermione said afraid. "Like in a *muggle* college?" Luna said wide-eyed. "Yes, my parents wanted me to, since in the magical world there aren't any." Hermione shrugged. "Oh, and what are you going to study?" Luna said as she popped a cup of coffee out of nowhere. Hermione looked alarmed. "Don't worry, nobody saw me, and the waiter never came, so..." she shrugged. "Well, I want to be a dentist" Hermione simply said. "That's interesting," Luna chipped happily. "Really? You're ok with it? I thought you were going to talk me out of it." "Why would I? After all it's what you want to do with the rest of your life. Besides, it's more than what other people want," the girl finished as she sipped on her coffee. "What do you mean?" Hermione asked suspicious. "Harry," Luna simply said. "What about him?" "You still haven't talked to him?" Luna said surprised. "No, we haven't talked in... a month," Hermione said ashamed. Luna regarded her for a moment with her protuberant eyes. "Harry's a mess" Luna said. Hermione looked at her surprised. "What do you mean?" "He misses you," she said playing with her hair. "You saw him?" Hermione asked trying to sound nonchalant but failing miserably. "Yes, two days ago. He's sad, he said you were mad at him but he didn't know if he should approach you... "What he did was wrong," Hermione immediately said getting on the defensive. "Bringing Ronald to your house? He did it out of concern; he thought it was the best for you." "Well he thought wrong," Hermione said, getting agitated. She breathed once to try to remain calm. "You have to understand, he's also grieving," Luna said. Hermione blinked once. "He didn't lose his parents." "No he didn't, but a lot of people died during the war, people dear to him, and he's upset too." Luna regarded Hermione for a moment before staring off into space. The brown haired girl didn't know what to say. "Oh, and Lupin, wasn't he close to his dad? So that's the next thing closest to a parent he could have," Luna finished. Hermione felt terrible, she had completely forgotten that other people besides her parents were gone, people Harry deeply cared about. "I'm such an idiot," she said, feeling her world cloud over her. "No you're not, you're just so sad about your parents that you didn't see Harry is in pain as well," Luna explained in her dreamy voice. "What am I supposed to do now?" Hermione asked desperately. How could she amend such a mistake? "You could go and visit him," Luna suggested. "Oh, right," Hermione said and broke into a smile. "Thank you Luna, would you mind if I leave right away? I have to apologize to someone." "It's okay, go, I'll finish up my coffee here." She smiled. Hermione hesitated but went over and hugged the girl. "We'll be in touch," she said as she let go. Luna beamed again. "That would be nice, say hello to Harry," she replied. Hermione left and Luna, out of boredom, made some biscuits appear on the table. The sound of plates crashing down on the floor caught her attention. The waiter was looking at her, the tray he was holding askew, and a look of disbelief plastered across his face. "You should try these, they're filled with coconut cream," Luna said, her mouth full of the biscuits. The waiter's eyes went blank and he fell backwards. --> 3. Comforting each other ------------------------ **A/N:** Hey guys, thanks for the reviews, they always make me smile. I see a lot of people thought a month being way too long for Hermione to stop talking to Harry, but I see her as a proud character, and as long as she thinks she's right, she's really stubborn, so… Luna was the one that opened her eyes to the whole situation, so here's the apology. I hope you won't kill me! Hehe… Anyway, enjoy, and don't forget to leave a review after you're done. :) **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, etc. I have no intent on making money out of this, just a way of releasing some stress. -- "Harry?" Hermione called, looking around the place. The fireplace was out and the entire room was filled in darkness. She looked down the hall and saw a small light coming under the door of Harry's room. Without thinking twice she walked over there and opened the door. What she saw made her stop short. "Hermione?" Ginny Weasley said flabbergasted. She was sitting on the bed wearing one of Harry's shirts, *just* Harry's shirt, Hermione noticed. Both girls began to blush furiously. "I, I'm so sorry... I didn't know... I-I'll go," Hermione stuttered and without waiting for a response walked out the door. She heard Harry's voice behind her back but didn't stop until she reached the living room. "Hermione wait!" Harry reached out to her and grabbed her arm, making her spin around to face him. Hermione's jaw dropped, he had just stepped out of the bathroom, clearly in haste since he still had shampoo all over his hair, and a towel draped carelessly around his waist. "I have to go," she stammered, looking anywhere but him. "Please, wait, I can't believe you're here," his voice sounded expectant. "Don't go, give me five minutes and I'll be out, please?" Hermione looked up and saw his hopeful eyes; she couldn't say no to that look. "Okay," the words slipped out of her lips before she got a chance to register what she had agreed to, but Harry merely smiled at her and went back to his room pleading at her not to go all the way. She sat down in the living room, trying to make something out of what she had just seen. She couldn't believe that Ginny and Harry were... *no* she thought, *don't go there*. She closed her eyes, trying to get rid of the image of Ginny in Harry's shirt, but the more she tried the more vivid the memory was. It was itched to the back of her eyelids. "Hi," a small voice said that got her out of her reverie. Ginny was standing just next to her, already in her clothes, her face the same color as her hair. "Hi Ginny," Hermione said in a voice that didn't sound like her own. She suddenly found out that she didn't like Ginny that much. "Uh, how are you?" the younger Weasley kid said as she sat down next to her. Hermione tried with all her might not to inch farther away from her. "I'm as good as I can be... how about you? How are your parents? Everyone?" she asked, trying to sound casual, but her tone betraying her facade. Why did she want to strangle Ginny all of a sudden? But the younger girl's face turned sad at once and Hermione felt guilty. "I guess I could use your answer... George's staying with us, though he doesn't want to spend much time around the family. He made us all cover every mirror that's in the house," she shrugged and her eyes got teary. "I'm so sorry Gin," Hermione tried to sound sympathetic. Of all the Weasleys George must've been the one feeling the worst. "Oh, it's okay... his pictures still make us laugh. George's getting better, the other day he sort of smiled... I'm worried about Ron," she said, looking up at Hermione with cautious eyes. "Oh," that was all she could muster. What was she supposed to say to that? But she didn't have to answer since Harry re-emerged from his room, shampoo free and fully dressed. Both Ginny and Hermione got up from their seats. "Hi," he said, looking directly at Hermione. His voice was so full of warmth and happiness that Hermione couldn't suppress a smile. "Hi," she said back and they just kept staring at each other. Someone cleared their throat and made them both come back to reality. "So, I'm just going to go," Ginny said, walking over to Harry and planting a very *he's mine* kiss in the mouth. Hermione looked away. "We'll talk later. Bye Hermione," Ginny commented and went over to her. They gave each other an awkward hug and Ginny let go right away. Taking some floo powder she threw it on the fireplace and in a swirl of green flames she was gone. "Er... take a seat," Harry said after the longest of silences. Hermione did as she was told. "So... you and Ginny, huh?" she managed to say without malice. Just the thought of it made her insides boil, but she couldn't understand why. Harry blushed. "Well, yeah... she came in all sad because she had a row with Ron, and I was sad as well so we just comforted each other and... "I don't need all the details," Hermione interrupted right away. Harry's face reddened even more. "Yeah, of course." There was a long pause. "How are you doing?" "How's life?" They both said at the same time and broke into a grin that dissipated the awkward atmosphere. "You go first," Harry said, smiling. "Well... I'll just get to the point, so, I'm sorry," Hermione said, "I'm sorry for being so hateful to you, I know you wanted to help me with Ron and everything, and even though your intentions were completely misguided it was a nice gesture, but still, I was mad. And I was thinking about myself, you lost important people as well and I never really thought of it, I just thought I was going through this on my own when clearly you were going through the same thing, with Lupin, and now he's gone and so is Tonks and so are many other people and I just... "Hermione breathe," Harry chuckled and she looked at him sheepishly. "I'm sorry," she repeated more calmly and Harry just shrugged. "It's okay, it's hard losing the people that have always been there for you, so I just let you be... but it hurt that you kicked me out the same way you did with Ron." "I didn't!" she defended herself. "You didn't shout at me, but your tone with me was harder... I felt really bad Hermione," Harry confessed and she felt ashamed. Suddenly she reached out her hand but the image of Ginny imprinted in her memory made her stop. She simply patted Harry's hand and pulled back. He looked quizzically at her. "I know, and that's why I'm here. I was an idiot. You were the only person next to me through it all and for that I'll always be thankful... and I'm an awful friend because I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry." She looked down at her hands. "Ginny helped me," Harry said innocently and Hermione involuntarily clenched her fists. "Of course, Ginny," she spat but caught herself too late. "Is everything okay between you and Ginny?" Harry had caught on her tone. Sometimes she wished he was as dense as Ron was. "Yeah, everything's fine... you got Ginny and that's just everything you need," she said without thinking and got up to leave. Harry followed her suit. "What? Hermione... "I have to go," she announced and made her way to the fireplace. Then she remembered she didn't have the floo network connected to her house. "Hermione stop!" Harry grabbed her by the arms and made her turn to look at him. "What's wrong with Ginny?" "Nothing! Whatever gave you that idea?" she said in a shrilly voice and cursed inwardly. *Why was she so upset?* "Well, look at you, I mention Ginny and..." Harry stopped talking and looked at her surprised. "What?" she spat angrily at the way he was regarding her. All of a sudden a small smile crept into his mouth. "Are you *jealous*?" he said in a teasing tone. "What? No!" Hermione shrieked. Harry's smile grew even wider. "You *are* jealous, I can't believe it!" "Stop being a prat Harry, I am *not* jealous," she said, turning around, clearly annoyed. He laughed. "Yes you are, look at you, I can almost see steam coming out of your ears!" he replied. "Oh yes Harry, you got me, I'm helplessly in love with you and I wanted *so* badly to be your first," Hermione mocked in anger. Harry stopped hauling in laughter and straightened to look over at her. "I was kidding Hermione, don't get mad," he reached out and grabbed her hand. She tried to let go but he held her tighter, "come here," he guided her into the sofa again and she followed resigned, "Ginny's leaving to Hogwarts, we were sort of saying goodbye," he confessed without letting go of her hand. "I thought you were going back to... to school," she corrected before saying to *her*. Harry shrugged. "We're not officially together if that's what you're wondering," he said and Hermione narrowed her eyes. "Okay, you're not wondering that, I just wanted you to know. "I'm not going to lie, not having you this past month was really hard, I had no one to talk to so I just contacted her, and it was nice, we suffered together so we got closer..." Hermione flinched, but thankfully Harry didn't notice. "But she's not you Hermione; nobody will ever replace you if that's what you're worried about. You'll always be my best friend," he finished smiling down at her. She should have felt better with that reassurance, but all Hermione could do was smile briefly at that statement. *Always* the best friend; it sounded way too long. She tried to compose herself and she merely nodded, not quite understanding why that made her so upset. She should be happy, right? But she wasn't, not entirely. "Okay," was all she could say and Harry thought it was enough as he came closer and hugged her, "you'll always have me," she said, feeling sadder than ever and Harry simply held her tighter. -- Hermione took a deep breath and ran her hands over her clothes. She was clearly nervous. Harry had told her that Ron was planning on going back to Hogwarts to finish his last school year. It had surprised them all. Apparently he was keen on becoming an Auror, and he would only be able to get in if he passed the necessary N.E.W.T.s. Everyone thought that helping destroy the darkest wizard of all times would be enough, but apparently the Auror department thought otherwise. With that information at hand, and knowing she wouldn't see him in God knows when, Hermione decided to send him a letter asking him to meet up with her. She had decided that her house was a good place since the Wizarding World was very intent on having every piece of news they could get from any of them, and she wasn't willing to give them that. She wanted to patch things up, to salvage whatever relationship she had with Ron. *No,* she corrected herself, *whatever friendship she had with Ron.* After all, they'd been friends for seven years now, and she couldn't toss that away. She needed to make amends, and that's why she'd contacted him. She was surprised when he said yes to her meeting; that meant he wanted to make amends too. So here she was now, waiting for the ring to bell (or so she hoped,) running her hands to smooth the inexistent wrinkles on her clothes. Just as she did that for what seemed to be the twentieth time, she heard a loud pop outside her door. She looked through the stained window panes to distinguish who it was. Someone cleared their throat. "Right, what's the thing I have to do now?" Ron's voice came from the outside and Hermione suppressed a smile. He would never get accustomed to all the muggle things. "Harry said something about a button... "Hello Ron," Hermione said with a smile as she opened the door. He was looking behind a pot for the so-called button. Immediately he straightened, his ears turning a bright red. "Hi Hermione," he stuttered and looked down at his hands. "You can come in," she informed him as she stepped aside to let him through. Ron did as he was told and a minute later they were both in the living room. He tried not to look around. "Sit," the girl ordered and he sat down very far away from her. Hermione rolled her eyes. "So... how are you doing? I was surprised you wrote to me," Ron began in a cautious tone. Hermione merely nodded. "Harry told me you're going back to Hogwarts; that's... that's great Ron, I'm proud," she told him sincerely and Ron smiled, clearly satisfied with her statement. "Yeah, I want to finish my last school year. You-you guys should come too," he probed her. Hermione pursed her lips. "I don't feel quite ready to face the Wizarding World, Ron." "I know, but everyone admires us and... "That's not the point," Hermione said sternly and Ron's mouth went shut, "really, is fame all you can think about?" "Of course not! I'm just saying that...” "Look, I don't want to fight," Hermione interrupted him, "I asked you to come because things were awful between us and I didn't want to leave it like that. We've been friends for so long... "We've been more than that," Ron timidly said as he came closer and took her hand in his. Hermione looked down, "I... I'm sorry I didn't contact you when your parents died. You can't imagine how much I regret that. I was sad, with Fred, I didn't know how to act properly; and then Harry comes in yelling at me because you needed me and I wasn't there for you. I was a lousy friend, a lousy boy- "Stop!" Hermione almost yelled as she finished that sentence in her mind. She removed her hand from his. "Look, Ron. I asked you to come here so we could patch things up, but I think that being friends is what suits us best," she said rapidly and Ron's expression told her he wasn't thinking among the same lines as she was. "What? But, Hermione... "I know," she mumbled and wiped the tears from her eyes. When had she begun to cry? "I thought you and I would finally be together, after everything we went through... "We can still be together," Ron interrupted her, taking her hand again. Hermione ignored his comment and continued to talk. "But you bailed out on me, the moment I needed you the most..." she hiccupped and continued. "I needed you, Ron, and you weren't there for me. Just like in the tent, you left us when everything seemed so dark." "But I returned!" Ron protested. "You did, but you left, and I don't want to rub it in your face the rest of our lives but the fact is that you left, just like you did now. I can't be with someone that leaves me every time there's a sticky situation. I need you to be strong for me and you're not. I just can't." Hermione let go of his hand. Ron looked crushed. "Hermione, *please*." His plea was the saddest thing she'd ever heard, but she couldn't step down, not now when she'd made her choice. "I'm sorry Ron; all I can offer you is my friendship. Will you take it?" she asked, her voice trembling. Ron looked at her as she'd grown two heads. Without another word, he got up and headed to the door. "Ron!" she called after him but he slammed the door shut. Tears ran freely down her cheeks as she Disapparated from her home and Apparated back at Harry's. "Hermione, hey! What's..." Harry didn't finish his sentence as Hermione flung her arms at him and cried into his shoulder. "Oh Harry, it was so bad! He didn't say anything, he just left!" Hermione wailed into his shirt. Harry looked puzzled. "What? Who? Oh..." he finally understood as he wrapped his arms around her and tried to comfort her. He'd become rather good at consoling crying girls, especially Hermione. -- Hermione sighed and rubbed at her eyes wearily. She had been studying for her admission test for the past two weeks. September was almost coming and beginning at college just was well. She'd passed the papers a little too late but given her marks they hadn't denied her; in fact they were giving her permission to present the test almost a month after all the other people had. Hermione'd talked to McGonagall about her desire to study at a muggle college and was quite surprised when the headmistress showed her complete support. She'd arranged everything to make it look as if Hermione'd been attending to a muggle boarding school, and that along with her notes was all she needed to apply for dentistry. Her exam was the next day and she if she passed they would allow her to enter the program. Putting her pen down, Hermione looked proudly at her notes. Even if she'd begun studying so late she'd managed to review all the basics and a little more; she was almost sure she'd pass with flying colors. She looked at the clock and noticed it was almost seven o'clock. "Better get ready," she mumbled to herself as she got up from her chair in the study and went to her own room. She was still living at home and she hadn't decided quite yet if she'd continue to live there or if she would move somewhere else. She loved to live here, and even if her parents weren't there anymore nothing felt more like home than the house she grew up in. She could almost feel her parents around every corner, and it was a feeling that warmed her heart. Putting some fresh clothes for dinner with Harry she looked around her own room, merely sighing at all the pictures of her parents and her that hung almost everywhere. "I hope you're proud of me tomorrow," she said to one picture where the two were smiling fondly and with that she Disapparated. She arrived at Harry's flat a moment later and looked at the clock, 6:45 p.m. "This is odd," she said aloud as she looked around the place. Everything was pitch black, as if nobody were home. Hermione pulled out her wand, feeling quite nervous. She walked towards the kitchen but found nothing, and then proceeded down the hall to each open door, until she reached Harry's. She was about to say something when she heard the softest sound: a muffled cry. Panicked, she barged in with all the courage that she had, ready to disarm whoever was causing Harry any pain, when she saw him sitting on the edge of his bed, his back to her. She blinked, her eyes more accustomed to the darkness now, and noticed he hadn't moved at all, but he'd surely heard her. "Harry?" she asked timidly, still with her wand at the ready. She walked towards him but stopped before she got any closer. Why wasn't he looking at her? "Hey, you're early," Harry said without turning around. Hermione frowned; something was wrong. "Are you okay?" she said as she lowered her wand. She was afraid to come closer to him. "Yeah, I'm fine," he responded almost automatically. Honestly, did he think she didn't know him? Hermione rounded on him and stood right in front of him; he had his face lowered to the floor. "Harry, what's going on?" she asked a little more firmly. Still he didn't move. "Harry!" she scolded him and with her hand she raised his head. A small gasp escaped her lips. There were streaks of tears on his cheeks, and his eyes were red on the edges. "What happened?" she asked alarmed as she knelt before him and took his face between her hands. "It's nothing," he replied weakly but Hermione looked at him sternly. "Harry..." her voice warned him. He simply moved his face away from her hands and looked at his side. "I'm fine," he said just above a whisper. "No, you're not," she contradicted him, and put her hands on his thighs. "Look at me," she said softly and Harry didn't budge, "Harry, look at me," she commanded and this time he turned to her. There was sadness etched to his face and it broke her heart. Suddenly Luna's words came to her mind, *a lot of people died during the war, people dear to him, and he's upset too*. He was grieving as well, and he hadn't cried in all this time, or, Hermione reflected, he hadn't cried in front of her; he was trying to go through this alone. "Oh Harry," she said and she straightened up to hug him properly. He let her hug him and he buried his face on her hair, weeping softly. Hermione didn't say anything else, and neither did he. There was so much she wanted to tell him, that everything was going to be okay, that they'd make it through, but she didn't find her voice; instead she started to cry too. She cried for all the fallen ones, not just her parents, but all her friends that had perished during the war: Lupin, Tonks, George... and for Harry too, because she knew, deep inside of her, that a part of him had died as well, and he would never be the same again. They stood that way for a while, the two crying in each other's arms, until Hermione's knees gave away and she broke the embrace to sit next to him in bed. She hadn't so much as sat down when Harry threw his arms around her once again. "It hurts," he mumbled against her ear. She made small circles on his back as he talked, "I miss them all, and I know it was their choice, but I still feel it was somehow my responsibility." "You can't choose the fates of others Harry; they made their choice and it doesn't have to fall on your back." "Why are you crying too?" "Because they were my friends too, they were my family just as much as they were yours," she answered back. "I should be the strong one, you need me to be strong," he said and Hermione shook her head without letting go. "Accepting the pain only makes you stronger Harry, and letting me know about it makes you more right for me than anyone else," she said without completely understanding the meaning of her words, but she needed to say them nonetheless. "I love you, you know that, right?" Harry said with a teary voice. Hermione nodded and kissed him on the cheek. Her heart swelled at his words. She thought he'd never said that to anybody else and the fact that he'd first said them to her made her feel the more special. "I do, and I love you too," she replied and Harry tightened his grip on her. Oh how much he needed her at that moment and Hermione was so glad she'd arrived earlier that night. Who knows how many nights he'd felt like this and there would be no one to comfort him. "Now, I came here for a dinner and I'm not going until I get it," she joked as she pulled away a little bit and Harry laughed. It was good to hear him laugh. Gently she took his glasses off and wiped off his eyes. "Yes, sorry, I was in the middle of cooking when I remembered doing it at the Dursleys, and I thought, wow I was wrong at that time, because I thought that I wouldn't feel more miserable than with them at those moments but I proved myself wrong," he gave a bitter laugh and looked at her with lost eyes. "I *am* miserable Hermione, truly miserable." "I am too," she admitted as she wiped away her own tears, "but I'm less miserable when I'm with you," she finished and gave him a small smile. Harry returned it. "Me too," he said, looking at her with such tenderness that Hermione's heart skipped a bit. She ignored the feeling. "Let's go and eat, I'm starving!" she said and Harry laughed again. They got up and made their way to the kitchen, laughing their way over there. Hermione couldn't help but feel closer to Harry than ever, and that thought alone made her night. --> 4. The experiment ----------------- **A/N:** Hey everyone, first of all I want to say thank you for your response, and for those people who don't like the story, I accept constructive criticism, but if you're going to say something bad then don't say anything because I won't even bother to reply next time. Seriously, if you disagree with the story move on to the next one, there are a lot of good stories here, so stop being cruel and do something useful with your time rather than throwing flames at me. I just wanted to make that clear. Second of all, I don't think I'll be able to post another chapter next week since it will be the last chapter, it's not written yet, and I don't have time to write this week since I have 4 tests throughout the week, so I'm sorry for those of you who patiently wait for me. Anyway, I'll stop the rant now, I hope this chapter somewhat makes up for the last, since I received mixed reviews about it. Tell me what you think with a review! Have a nice week! **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, etc. I have no intent on making money out of this, just a way of releasing some stress. -- "I don't understand how you do it," Emily, Hermione's classmate said as they sat down on the latter's kitchen for a cup of tea. It was 3:45p.m. of a windy November day and they had just gotten out of a particularly difficult test, "how did you even know the answer of question 35? I didn't even know what they were talking about," the girl complained. "I told you to read with me before class that passage from the book," Hermione gently reprimanded her friend as Harry sat down with them as well. "I guess you did well," he chuckled, referring to his long time friend. Emily bit her lips to stifle a laugh. "I did," Hermione said, shrugging a little, "but it was because of all the hard work and studying that I did." "Oh, as if I didn't study with you!" Emily said, narrowing her eyes. "You did, but I told you that doing a little summary of the book would've helped a bit more," Hermione said slowly as if talking to a little child. "100 pages is *not* a 'little summary'," Emily mimicked Hermione in a high pitched voice. Harry laughed. "It doesn't matter, now you've learned the lesson," Hermione simply said, and Emily huffed. "Don't worry, she's always been like this, you just need to be patient," Harry said with a smirk, and Hermione stuck her tongue out at him. He simply rolled his eyes. "Very patient," Emily said, and it was Hermione's turn to narrow her eyes at her. "Well, as interesting as this chat is, I have to go. I'm visiting the Weasleys, but I was waiting to see how you did," Harry commented and as he got up, he gave Hermione a brief kiss on the top of her head before bidding Emily good bye and heading out for the door. When the two of them heard it shut, Emily turned to Hermione with bright eyes. "What?" Hermione asked, looking suspiciously at her new friend. "So, you and Harry..." "I already told you there's nothing between us," she said, clearly exasperated. They had touched that subject many times. "Oh come on! The guy's so sweet to you, he spends most of the time here with you, and he barely goes to sleep at his own flat anymore..." "He just stays too late here and I don't want him to go alone at such hours," Hermione interrupted her. "He even has his own bedroom," Emily continued, completely ignoring Hermione. "And he's so devoted to you, not to mention he's incredibly gorgeous..." "Okay, stop!" Hermione said before the matter got out of her hands. "He's my friend, my *best* friend. How can he not be nice to me?" "Not nice, devoted to you," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "Come on Hermione, with a friend like that I would've jumped his bones ages ago." "It's not that simple, I sort of dated our other best friend. Do you know how weird that would be?" "A kiss is not the same as dating; it was a bloody kiss, get over it!" Emily emphasized with her hands. "Besides, you haven't talked to the guy in ages and you said yourself you didn't feel anything like that for him anymore." "I know, it's just..." "What? What's getting between you and that hunky friend of yours?" Emily asked and Hermione rolled her eyes. Ever since they'd met Emily had shown a lot of interest in Harry. She'd said that he was absolutely handsome and that she would go for him, but the minute she saw the way he and Hermione were to each other, Emily had backed off. Since then she insisted on the two of them to get together. "It's different. Harry's been like my first best friend and I don't want anything to ruin that. His friendship means the world to me and if I'd lose it I wouldn't know what to do." "But think of the things you would gain if you give it a try," Emily insisted and Hermione shook her head. "For instance, you could kiss him..." "Oh stop it," Hermione said, rolling her eyes. She suddenly found the conversation pointless. "Is that all you can think about?" "Not really," Emily answered, wiggling her eyebrows and Hermione blushed at the meaning behind her words. "Emily!" she scolded, sipping her very cold and forgotten tea to hide the new red color adorning her cheeks. "You asked," her friend replied innocently, mimicking her actions. "Oh, this is cold," she muttered as she set the cup down. "Honestly, Harry and I are just friends and that's all we've ever going to be." "But you wouldn't mind being *more* than just friends, would you?" Emily asked and Hermione almost choked on her horrible tea. She was definitely not expecting that question. "What are you talking about?" Hermione answered with a question of her own as she gave a shrilly (and false) laugh. "Oh, so you *have* thought about it," Emily replied, trying very hard not to smirk. "No I haven't," Hermione said, standing up, "I'm going to make some more tea," she announced as she went over to the stove and put a kettle with water on it. "Hermione Granger, you are such a bad liar," Emily's voice said from the back. Hermione pretended to be very busy examining the kettle. Her friend rounded on her and they were now face to face. "Look, I have an idea. I know it must be tough to have all this feelings for your best mate but it can be a good thing." "I don't..." "Now, I want you to do something," Emily continued talking, pulling Hermione back to her seat and sitting herself next to her, "I know how much you love experiments, and even more to research for data that will ultimately back up your original hypothesis, right?" "Er... right," Hermione repeated, clearly confused. Where was she going with this? "So, I want you to see this as an experiment. The question, is it a good idea to get together with Harry? The research, look for all the positive and negative things of getting into a relationship with him. The hypothesis, do you feel something other than repugnance when you snog Harry senseless? Analyze your data and make a conclusion about it. And finally, tell me, but more important, tell *him* why it's such a good idea, because I know those are going to be the results!" she finished smugly. "Em..." "Oh, don't forget to record every step of it!" her friend said excitedly and Hermione frowned. "I can't just do that." "Of course you can," her friend stated matter-of-factly. Now Hermione knew why people were so irritated when she talked like that, "you like to approach everything in an analytical and methodical way, so why would this be any different? Just do it and you'll be surprised with the results." Emily smiled and she looked down at her watch. "Oh, darn, I have to go, the folks are waiting for me for this ridiculous tea party with the neighbors," she said, rolling her eyes. She got up and grabbed her things. "See you tomorrow in class," she said and went for the door. She stopped and turned around. "Oh, and Hermione, don't forget to put your theory into practice, okay?" She winked and with that she was gone. Hermione sat there motionless for a long while, thinking of all the things Emily had told her. It was a horrible idea; she couldn't risk her friendship with Harry like that, could she? *But if I analyze all the variables...* she thought but shook her head. *This is not happening, why do I let her get ideas into my head?* Hermione chewed on her bottom lip. This was a horrible idea, but it could be an interesting experiment like her friend had told her. Torn between what to do, Hermione pulled out a notebook and a pen and started to scribble down all the things. "Pros and cons of being in a romantic relationship with Harry..." she mumbled to herself and with a wave of her wand turned off the stove when the kettle started to hiss that incessant noise. -- "Hermione?" Harry called when he Apparated back to Hermione's place. He wasn't sure if her friend was still there, and he hoped not, he needed to give her something very important that would surely make her all teary-eyed. When he got no response he checked the living room, the dining room, the library, and he was ready to go to her room when he found her in the kitchen, sitting in the same spot she had been when he'd left 5 hours ago. She was writing down furiously in what appeared to be a notebook and she hadn't realized he was there. "Hello?" he called again and still she ignored him. Frowning, Harry went over to her and put a hand to her shoulder that made her jump and before he knew it she was pointing her wand at him. "Harry, what the hell?" Hermione said, putting down her wand as soon as she realized who he was and looking at him warily. "Merlin, relax, it's just me!" he said, looking at her alarmed. Hermione relaxed her posture and sat down again but turning around to see him. "I'm sorry, I was concentrated in something," she said, shrugging. "I can see that," Harry chuckled. "So, what are you working on?" he asked, craning his neck to see behind her. Immediately, Hermione turned around and closed the notebook in a quick movement. "Nothing!" she answered and she pointed her wand at it. A soft yellow glow surrounded the book for a moment and then it vanished. "I don't think it's *nothing* if you're putting protective charms on it," he commented with a grin. Hermione rolled her eyes. "Fine, if you don't want to tell me I won't ask again," he said unabashed, going to the fridge and opening it to get a bottle of juice. He failed to see the way Hermione was contemplating him. "So, the Weasleys sent their regards, they want to see if you're free next Friday for dinner," he commented as he opened the bottle and took a swig of it. When no response came, he turned around to find Hermione sitting with her back to the table, a look of concentration on her face. "Anything wrong?" he asked warily. Hermione bit her bottom lip. "Can I ask you something?" she said, her brow furrowed. "Sure," he replied as he took another swig of his juice. "I'm doing an experiment, it's kind of important. Would you mind helping me proving a theory?" she exclaimed and waited for his response. Harry finished his juice, put the bottle on the counter and looked back at her. "Sure, no problem. As long as it's not pulling a tooth out of my mouth..." he joked but Hermione didn't smile. Instead, she got up and went over to him, a look of determination on her face. "This won't take long," she simply said. "Alright, what do you..." Harry started but got cut off when Hermione pressed her lips swiftly to his. His eyes opened wide enough to feel they were popping out of his face. And before he could pull back Hermione pushed herself more against him and put her hands around his neck. He stood there shocked to the very core, trying to reason what on earth his best friend was doing before she pressed her lips harder against his and involuntarily his eyes snapped shut. Harry fought hard to remain reasonable, but his friend was making it a very difficult task for him. -- Hermione had been on the verge of a heart attack the moment Harry'd touched her shoulder. She'd thought an intruder had come inside and she wanted to reprimand herself for not having noticed this happening. But then she'd seen the scared look on Harry's face and her heart, which she thought would stop beating fast after getting such a fright, doubled its pace and she fought hard not to blush. She'd sat down and had almost forgotten her notebook, full of useless notes (because that's what they were), until he had asked about it. Horrified about thinking he could actually see what she'd written, Hermione launched herself to the table to close it and secure it with some useful protective charms she'd learned while studying at Hogwarts. Clearly defeated, Harry then had began to talk about nonsense and she couldn't concentrate on anything he was saying because she was busy staring at his bum. Not once in her life had she stop to have a look at it, a really good look at it, but now that she was staring straight at his behind she couldn't stop doing it. And so began her inner debate, why was she suddenly looking at his bum? She'd never done that before, but she was now. And she started to blame Emily for having pointed out that Harry was good looking. Really, she had grown up with him; she'd been so used to his presence that never once had she thought about him in such a non-platonic way. She wanted to stop thinking about him, and she scolded herself for letting Emily get into her head the idea of the stupid experiment. She'd been working on it all afternoon, neglecting her homework, and now she was almost done. She needed to prove her theory, her hypothesis, and now that Harry was here she could do just that. Taking a deep breath, she'd asked him to help her out. He'd said yes without even asking what it was about. So she'd went over to him, and without really telling him what was on her mind, she'd pushed herself against him, and now she was kissing him. Honestly, this could be the worst idea she'd ever had, or she'd ever let someone get her into, but now she was in Harry Potter's, her best friend's arms, and she found herself enjoying it. She'd been surprised the moment their lips made contact but it was soon replaced by this new sensation. She couldn't pinpoint what it was exactly, only that it felt good, so the more reasonable thing to do was to prove her theory. *Snog Harry senseless* echoed in her mind over and over again, in what was clearly Emily's voice. She would hit her hard once she was done here. For now, she would concentrate on that, and she would prove Emily how wrong she was on it. She stopped planning how to make her friend pay when Harry's arms found their way around her waist, and her little yelp was muffled by Harry's lips as they started to move on their own accord against her. Harry was kissing her back! She thought he'd pushed her after the initial shock, but now she was surprised that he was responding (and quite eagerly) to her little experiment. He pulled her closer to him and Hermione put her hands on his hair, combing it with her fingers and feeling its texture. Harry turned them both around so she was now pressed against the counter, and Hermione's head went reeling. This kiss was not what she had expected, not the simple and innocent and repugnant kiss she'd thought it would be, but the hot, passionate and mind blowing kiss they were currently engaged in. Harry's hands flew to the counter, pressing himself harder against her, and Hermione gasped. She pulled his head closer to hers with her hands and her eyes opened in shock when she registered Harry's tongue probing its entrance to her mouth. Without even realizing it, her mouth flew open and Harry snaked his tongue into it, the little devil tracing every tooth, every space inside it, and finally touching her own tongue with his. Hermione didn't budge; her tongue started to play with his, and soon they were engaged in this frantic battle, their tongues entwining and pushing and licking and their teeth scraping and biting. They continued for as long as their lungs would let them, but when Hermione thought she would pass out from lack of oxygen, she pulled away, her breathing erratic and her heart beat faster and louder (or so she thought) than ever. They stood there, in each other's arms for a little while, trying to regain a normal breathing, when Hermione came to her senses and gently pulled Harry away. "Er... thanks Harry, that would be all," she said in a shrilly voice and, as she disengaged herself from him, went to retrieve her notebook, lying forgotten on the kitchen table, and without looking back she walked to the kitchen door, went up the stairs, and shut herself in her bedroom. Harry stood there for a long time, trying to regain some sense, and when he did, he Disapparated back home. --> 5. The last ----------- **A/N:** Well, here's the last chapter. I hope you guys enjoy it. I want to say I had a lot of fun writing this story, and I hope you had fun reading it. As usual, I appreciate your comments in the form of reviews. I accept *constructive* criticism, so when you write down what you want to tell me, think first of the way you'd like people to write to you. I don't think there's anything more to say. Sorry it took me a week longer than usual, but I've been busy with life. Thanks in advance. :) **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, etc. I have no intent on making money out of this, just a way of releasing some stress. If someone is interested in posting this in another site, please tell me first. -- The atmosphere was heavy, the air felt electrified, shivers running up and down her spine, and Hermione couldn't control the goose bumps forming on her arms. "Are you okay?" Harry asked, his piercing green eyes rooting Hermione to the spot. Her eyes widened and she gasped at the intensity of his stare, millions of bolts reaching every single nerve in her body. She had to remember herself to breathe. "Yeah, I-I'm fine," Hermione said, looking down at her hands. "No, you're not; something's bothering you," Harry said in a husky whisper, and Hermione noticed how close he'd gotten to her at that moment. "I..." she trailed, fighting hard to remain controlled. "What?" Harry murmured, his gaze locked on her lips. Hermione gulped and Harry merely smiled as he put his hands around her waist. "I..." she repeated, and felt quite stupid for not being able to form a coherent response. "That's what I thought." Harry grinned as he came closer to her. Hermione's heart beat quickened and she could listen to it beating furiously against her chest. Pump, pump, pump, pump, pump, *pump*! Her eyes snapped open and she stared around, taking in her surroundings. "Teddy, I told you not to wake her up!" Harry gently scolded his godson, and Teddy merely giggled. Hermione blinked as she realized it had all been a dream. *Of course,* she thought bitterly. She had fallen asleep on the couch while reading a fantasy book to Teddy, and the boy appeared not to appreciate it as he softly hit her with his rubber hammer on the chest. Hermione sighed; it had been such a nice dream. "I'm sorry, I thought he was going to behave," Harry reprimanded the boy, but he just giggled harder, his electric blue hair swirling with different colors, as it often did when he was having fun. "It's all right, I shouldn't have fallen asleep, I guess," Hermione shrugged. Teddy looked at her with wide eyes and his hair settled to the same brown her hair was. "What where you dreaming about? You looked very... happy," Harry murmured, looking away. "Oh, eh... about my teacher telling me I'd gotten the highest score in a test," Hermione easily lied. "Oh, really? Is that why you were moaning?" Harry asked as he tried to suppress a mischievous smile. Hermione's eyes opened like saucers and she blushed, looking away. Teddy laughed at her sudden embarrassment. "I am so sorry!" she apologized as she ruffled through Teddy's locks. He gurgled happily. "Actually, I think it was kind of sexy," Harry said more to himself than to her and immediately froze. "What?" Hermione asked, flabbergasted. "Nothing," Harry yelped as he took Teddy in his arms and the two of them made their way to Teddy's room. Hermione thought hard and decided to follow him. "Are you going to make him take his nap?" Hermione asked, looking at Harry's back as he settled the toddler in his crib. "Yeah, Andromeda told me it was important to make him sleep at this hour, so he won't wake that much during the night," Harry said as he caressed the little boy's cheek. Teddy laughed and as Hermione got closer, she noticed his hair changing to match Harry's. "He's so adorable," she said as she tickled him on the stomach. The baby laughed harder and took her finger in his tiny hand. Hermione smiled. "Yeah, he is," Harry agreed as he stared at the baby. The two of them stood there, waiting for Teddy to fall asleep, each consumed by their own thoughts. It didn't take long for the baby to blink as his eyelids began to close. They waited until he was completely asleep, and it was like they woke up from another dream. The comfortable silence they'd been in turned into an awkward one as if it'd been turned on by a switch. They turned to look at each other and immediately looked away. Hermione bit on her bottom lip and cleared her throat. "Well, I'm just going to... study," she lied as she got out of the room as fast as her feet would let her and she sat down in the dining room. She didn't even hear Harry's plans, and from the corner of her eye she saw him walking to the living room and sitting down on the couch with a newspaper in his hands. Hermione didn't know for how long they pretended to be like that. The atmosphere was so thick that she felt oppression on her chest. She tried to ignore it and she went to sit at the living room on the same couch, but as far away as possible. Harry merely nodded to acknowledge her presence. She felt guilty, inexplicably guilty. Well, maybe inexplicably didn't qualify for. She knew exactly why she felt this way: she had screwed things up. Harry acted so weird around her, and she acted weird around him too, and now their perfect platonic friendship had forever been ruined by her blatant mistake. How could she fix things? She didn't know how to approach the matter, and the fact that Harry decided altogether to ignore it wasn't helping either. Teddy had been the perfect excuse for the two of them to ignore it, but now that the baby was asleep, the silence was deafening and very oppressing. A needle falling was all it would take to break the silence, and yet she found none. Instead she tried to focus on her homework, reading the same passage again and again and failing miserably to understand what was written in it. Harry was at the opposite end of the couch pretending to be reading the newspaper, and she knew that because of the way his eyes scanned the same portion over and over again. Defeated, she sighed and put her hands down in a loud manner to get his attention. He flinched but didn't look up. "Harry..." she started tentatively. He merely nodded as to recognize that he was listening, but still he didn't look up. Hermione pursed her lips and tried again with more force in her voice. "Harry, we need to talk." Harry's form went rigid, as if knowing what was about to come, and slowly put down the newspaper and stared at his hands. "Will you even look at me?" Hermione asked annoyed. Harry's heard jerked upwards, clearly surprised by her tone. She refrained from rolling her eyes at him. "Listen, about what happened the other day..." she trailed off, and didn't say anything else because she *didn't* know what to say. "Yes?" Harry prompted; clearly interested in knowing how she would approach the subject. But she didn't know how. Her mind stopped working as she recalled the feeling of being pressed against him, his mouth moving against her in such an invigorating way. She blushed as the memories came back to her, and from the corner of her eye she noticed Harry taking in her expression and blushing as well; but he didn't look down, so that was always a good sign. "I, I know I should say I'm sorry for messing things up between us, but I don't feel sorry at all about what happened," she confessed not only to Harry, but to herself. She bit her lower lip. "I enjoyed it, Harry. I *liked* it, and I shouldn't have. But the thing is, I did, and now everything's so awkward between us and I don't want to lose you as a friend..." she stopped talking as she didn't know what else to say. She had been fidgeting with the hem of her shirt, not daring to look up at him and melt right in the spot. She sneaked a peek at him and was surprised to see a small smile playing on his lips. "You liked it?" he asked a little dazed. Hermione rolled her eyes this time; men and their ego. "Yeah, I did," she responded. "I liked it too," Harry admitted, and Hermione was surprised. "You did?" she asked, clearly disconcerted. "Yeah," Harry answered a little shyly. "I thought it was going to be weird because... well, because it's us, but it didn't feel weird at all. It felt really good. Should I be sorry about that?" "No!" Hermione almost yelled and chastised herself. "No. I mean, if neither of us feels bad about it, then..." "Then what?" Harry asked, his eyes suddenly shining in an almost hypnotic way. Hermione was left breathless by the way he was looking at her. She felt her face glow just by being under his intense gaze. How could he make her feel like that now, if never before had he made her feel that way? *Well, snogging him did change your perception of things*, her mind told her insolently. Hermione sighed. "I don't know. Honestly, I don't..." she trailed off. To say Harry looked disappointed was an understatement. She shook her head and tried again. "I guess, I guess we could try and see if it happens again. You know, if it feels good again, not just because of the novelty or anything." She shrugged. "You want us to snog again?" Harry asked, his eyebrows shooting upwards. Hermione simply nodded. "All right," Harry conceded in a too enthusiastic tone and Hermione narrowed her eyes. Had he been waiting for this opportunity once more? She let go of the idea as Harry almost flew the distance that was separating them and sat down next to her, oh so very close that she could smell the coffee he had just had. She gulped. "Er... how are we supposed to do this?" she asked in a weak voice and cursed inwardly. Good moment to sound so weak. Harry merely smiled a smile that sent her heart one hundred miles per hour and she controlled hard the urge to blush. "I guess something along this." Harry grinned and closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around her. Hermione immediately felt light-headed as his lips confidently worked their way on hers. Putting her arms around his neck, Hermione brought him closer and she almost whimpered at the way he was making her feel. He bit her lower lip softly and she gasped, but the sound was muffled by his mouth as he continued to work his magic on her. Because this felt more like magic than all the spells she'd ever cast in her whole life since getting accepted to Hogwarts. How was it possible to feel like this because of a simple kiss? It was almost sinful the way Harry made her feel as if she were burning to the very core. His hands went to the small of her back and he started to graze his fingertips to her uncovered skin. She moaned against him and heard him groan. Harry took her by the waist and lifted her up so that she was sitting on his lap, and Hermione felt a very happy Harry under her. She moaned again. This felt *so* good. Harry's mouth flew to the corner of her mouth and then to her ear, and he sucked on her earlobe, causing Hermione to wail as she gripped his shoulders tightly. His mouth left a trail of moist kisses down her neck and then he started to kiss her collarbone, and Hermione thought she was about to explode. Kisses were definitely overrated, she vaguely thought. His hands positioned themselves on her thighs as he leaned against her and she felt the couch touch her back. This was getting out of control, but for the life of her she couldn't stop it. "Oh, Harry!" she breathed and heard him groan again. His lips moved upwards and crashed against hers as he idly massaged her sides. She needed oxygen, she needed time to think what this was all about, she needed... she needed Harry to continue what he was doing, her body reasoned. But as much as she was enjoying herself, Hermione found the strength to gently push Harry away as she tried to regain her composure. He looked down at her, desire written all over his face, lust shining in his eyes, and wanton pouring out of his every pore. Hermione shivered and closed her eyes to mantain her own desire at check. Reluctantly Harry moved away to give her some space, but not far enough for her to still feel the heat radiating off his body. She resisted the urge to shiver again. They stood there in silence for a while, each trying to regain their senses and to let their breathing even. After a while Hermione opened one eye and looked sideways at Harry, whose head was bent down as he too tried to collect himself. She sat down properly on the couch and cleared her throat. "Are you..." "Just give me another minute," Harry said in a strangled voice and Hermione noticed how he inadvertently crossed his legs. She blushed furiously at this, but waited patiently for him to speak again. Minutes passed by and still Harry remained with his eyes closed, a look of determination in his face. She wanted to reach out to him, but thought better of it. Maybe her voice and her touch would trigger something in him that he wanted desperately to control. She blushed again. "Okay," Harry finally said and she looked up at him. He was staring at her, but not precisely at her; his eyes were focused on a point just behind her, and she looked down, feeling at fault. "I guess we can say that it wasn't because of the novelty," she tried to lighten the mood, but Harry pursed his lips. She mentally smacked herself, "what do you think of it?" "What do *you* think of it?" Harry countered her with a question of his own and Hermione was rendered speechless for a few seconds. "Well, I think that, uh... I-I don't know Harry. What am I supposed to say after this?" she motioned the two of them with her hands. Harry looked hard at her. "I don't know, maybe that you like it and not just because it's physically pleasant?" he said in a mocking tone. Hermione was surprised by the edge in his voice. "What are you talking about?" she asked, clearly confused. "You like the kiss, but tell me, is it because of the kiss or because it came from me?" Harry said and Hermione felt rooted to the spot. "I don't know, I told Emily..." "Emily?" Now it was Harry's turn to be confused. "What's Emily got to do with any of this?" "Well, Emily was the one who gave me the idea. She said that maybe I should try to kiss you and see what would happen if..." "So you're telling me you did this because someone else told you to do so?" "No, it's not like that..." Hermione urged to explain as she saw Harry's trail of thinking. "Then, how is it?" Harry demanded. Hermione bit her lip, now worried. Should she tell him the truth? "You see, Emily says that you and I are like a couple, only that we don't see each other that way, so she thought that maybe if I tried a different approach with you, like in a kiss, I would see what she says it's always been there." "And she just suggested that and you accepted," Harry said, clearly skeptical. "Not like that, she said that I should see it more as in a methodical way, like an experiment, with the variables being..." "What?!" Harry interrupted her and Hermione knew she had screwed it all. She gulped at the murderous look he was giving her. "An experiment? You considered all of this an experiment?" "Don't yell," Hermione spat, suddenly feeling angry. "Well, what am I supposed to do, be thrilled by the idea of you experimenting with me?" Harry asked, clearly annoyed. "It's not like that!" Hermione defended herself. "Emily just suggested that I should approach it from a logical point of view, and that's what I did!" "And I have to feel better because of it?" Harry yelled. "Harry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... I just... I wanted to know what it was like to kiss you," Hermione finally admitted. She sighed in relief; it felt really good to get that off her chest. "What?" Harry asked, astounded. "I didn't do it just because Emily suggested it. I wanted to do it, and she just gave me the little shove I needed to make my decision. Lately, with all that's been happening, things have changed between us, or so I think. I didn't understand at first, but after I kissed you... it all made sense, Harry. This makes sense, I just didn't want to accept it," Hermione said, feeling defeated. She walked to the fireplace and gazed at the amber flames moving relentlessly, and she sighed. Her voice became barely above a whisper. "I'm sorry, you're not an experiment, it was a stupid idea. I needed a motive to kiss you without feeling dumb." "Then why didn't you just ask?" Harry's voice came from behind her and she turned around, surprised to find him a step away from her now. "It's not that simple. Hey, best mate of eight or so years, want to have a snog?" she said in a sardonic tone. "I would've said yes," Harry replied and gave her a small smile. Hermione looked at him skeptically. "Would you?" "You have no idea what I've been feeling lately," Harry commented as he took a hold of her hands, "and quite frankly, neither did I. All I know is that when I found out you were jealous of Ginny, I was thrilled." "I wasn't jealous," Hermione protested, but Harry made a shooshing sound. "You mean so much to me, and I love to have you around me. One day I realized it wasn't enough to have you as my friend, but I denied that, claiming I was confusing my sudden attachment to you. And then you kiss me and you open this door full of new possibilities... you confuse the hell out of me, Hermione Granger, and that's why I need you with me, to help me figure it all out." Hermione gulped, clearly at a loss of what to say. She was moved by his words, but even more by his feelings, which mirrored her own. Could he be more suited for her? She smiled. "Does that mean you forgive me for the little experiment?" she joked, trying to gain that small smile from him she found out she loved so much. "I don't know," Harry said pensively, but then his mouth broke into that grin that sent her heart racing, "you'll have to make it up to me." "Oh, is that so?" Hermione asked, feeling flirtatious, "I think I have something in mind," she said as she came closer to him. She could almost feel his breathing on her nose, when a cry broke them out of their reverie. The two of them looked at the hallway, down to the very door Teddy had been sleeping seconds before. "Perfect timing," Harry murmured annoyed. "Maybe later," Hermione said as she pecked Harry on the lips and went to look for the baby, whose screams could wake up the entire block. -- Today, one year ago, Hermione's life had been turned upside down. Looking down at her parents' graves, she thought of the pain it initially brought her when she first found out. Now she was feeling the same kind of pain, only in a more subdued way. She bent down to put one hand in each of their stones, and she silently made a prayer to say goodbye. "I love you," she murmured as she got up and wiped away the tears that had escaped her eyes. She turned around to find Harry patiently waiting for her. "Are you ready?" he asked in the gentlest of tones. Hermione nodded and took a hold of his hand. They started to walk around the cemetery, watching the people visiting their departed ones. "You okay?" "I don't think I'll ever be one hundred percent okay," she trailed off, gripping his hand tighter, "but I'm as good as it can be." "Is that enough?" Harry asked, looking at her with a worried expression on his features. Hermione smiled at him. Harry really was a great boyfriend. That year had passed by in a blur, and with Harry next to her, she felt it was all she needed. It had been strange at first, when they had started to date. Everyone had been quite shocked, and the Weasleys very mad, but eventually they had accepted it. Even Ron had forgiven them, with the promise that they would never even give each other a peck on the lips in front of him. It was a good settlement, at least until he got completely at ease with the fact that his two best friends were dating. The youngest Weasley wasn't so easily convinced, and she said she hated Hermione for taking away her "true love". Now they were civil to each other, but the friendship that once used to bring them together was gone, and Hermione didn't know if it was going to be this way forever; she hoped not, given that she deeply cared for Ginny, even if she was an annoying brat from time to time. Emily had asked their first child to be named after her, and Hermione could only roll her eyes at her friend's antics. Harry, on the other hand, thought it a good idea. He'd said he quite liked the name Emily, and Hermione was surprised to see him thinking of raising a family with her. She hadn't said anything, because that thought alone frightened her to death, and she preferred to live day by day. Harry had started the Healer program in January, and it had taken her by surprise. She'd thought he'd get a job playing Quidditch, or being an Auror, but he'd said that he'd taken enough lives as if was (Hermione scolded him for this, claiming that it hadn't been his fault at all), and he wanted to give something back to the community, in the form of saving lives. She was proud of him, even if it wasn't what she'd thought he would do with the rest of his life, but she supported him completely. As for herself, she was doing quite well in dentistry. She was the number one student, something that she tried hard to keep, since she was used to it. With all the twists and turns her life had gone to, this was the one thing she thought was a constant. But looking at Harry, his small smile adorning his face, she thought otherwise. "Are you there?" he asked, breaking her from her thoughts. "Yes, I'm sorry. And to answer your question, it's more than enough," Hermione said, giving him a small kiss on the lips and dragging him all the way out. -->