The Diary

Chapter Sixteen - The Return

Disclaimer: The only part of this story that is entirely my own is Emily and any other original characters. It's not much, but don't tell them that.

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Why do you always do this to me
Why couldn't you just see it through me
How come you act like this
Like you just don't care at all
“Why” - Avril Lavigne

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Once back in school, the days flew by. It was late September by the time James discussed Evans' new attitude with her. He'd meant to ask her about it earlier, but things had gotten rather frenetic. The teachers were pushing them harder than ever before, and Evans' new Prefect duties meant she wrote in her diary less and less often. James himself had been busy working on Operation Changeling. There was still a ways to go, but he was satisfied with the progress they'd been making.

Beyond that, Evans had failed to mention the Marauders since returning to school. She seemed to be deliberately avoiding the subject, but James didn't know why. Finally, he brought up the issue himself.

You know, you've yet to write anything about the Marauders. Did they mysteriously disappear or something?

Evans didn't respond for a while.

It's… I don't know. Things are different this year. I haven't really had time to care about them, and they've surprisingly left me alone for the most part.

It was true - he hadn't done anything to her. Then again, the Marauders had taken a holiday of sorts from pranking in order to focus on becoming Animagi. There were certain people, of course, that they would never let up on.

It seems like none of us can be bothered to deal with each other. It's very strange, but I don't mind. It's a relief, actually.

How is being a Prefect?

Time consuming and not terribly exciting. I'm sorry I haven't been able to write much lately.

It's fine. I don't expect you to put other things on hold for me.

James thought of a way he could get her to talk more about the Marauders.

Who's the other Prefect in your year?

Hah, I didn't tell you, did I? It's one of the Marauders, strangely enough. Remus Lupin.

I thought you said they didn't bother you anymore.

They don't. Remus and I patrol together. We talk a lot during our rounds. He's very intelligent, but also very sweet. How he ever got tangled up with those other boys is beyond me.

He snickered. Remus had, for some reason or another, given James and Sirius an alibi back in first year. They'd started inviting him along on their escapades, and he'd become a part of the group.

They probably blackmailed him or something.

What could they possibly use as blackmail?

James snorted.

I've no idea. I am but a simple diary.

Simple. Right.

Other than that, how is life?

There's really not much to say. I don't suppose I mentioned that Adam and Matilda are dating. Well, as much as two sixth-years can date in a castle with very few private spaces.

James had not known that. He had been too caught up in his own life to listen to the rumour mills.

I'm happy for them and all, but it's still awkward to see two people you've known for years to suddenly start snogging in front of you.

Luckily, there was no such problem for the Marauders. Remus didn't date on principle and Peter was too shy to ask anyone. Sirius had flirted around a bit fourth year, but now seemed to have given it up entirely. James was the only one who would go out with the same girl more than once. He'd once pointed that out to Sirius, who had responded that James should enjoy it; there was almost no competition.

I would commiserate, but my experience doesn't extend that far.

It wouldn't, would it? That would be very strange.

That it would.

As he was falling asleep that night, James realised that he rarely thought about why he was still writing to Evans. It just seemed like a very natural part of his life now, and he found it very hard to imagine quitting.

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At lunch the next day, Remus commented, “You've been watching Lily a lot lately”

“Have not.” James instantly denied Remus' accusation. He knew he was lying, but it wouldn't do for his friends to suspect anything. In truth, James found his eyes would often come to rest wherever Evans was. He still couldn't reconcile the Evans he wrote to with the Evans who claimed to loathe James Potter. It was such a ridiculous problem to have, and it caused a bizarre compulsion to observe her. This was quite difficult because he had to make sure she never noticed that he was looking her way.

“When did it become Lily?” asked Sirius interestedly.

Remus shrugged. “It's hard to patrol with someone and not call them by their first name. She's actually quite nice to me now.”

Sirius began to interrogate him about it, and James joined in for appearance's sake. He already knew that Remus and Evans had developed some sort of friendship, and James didn't think it was strange at all.

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In mid-October, the first Hogsmeade visit of the year was announced for the weekend before Halloween. James had been discussing the upcoming weekend with his friends by the bulletin board when he noticed someone trying to see over his shoulder.

“Is it necessary to keep everyone else from seeing the board?” Evans asked irritably.

“It's not going to vanish if you don't read it immediately,” James replied, instantly regretting the hint of hostility in his voice.

“Just move, Potter.” Her foot tapped impatiently, suggesting that she had much better things to do than plead her case to him.

“Come on, Evans, we're not that horrible. There's no need to get snippy with us.” Why was he still talking? Why didn't he just move?

Evans rolled her eyes. Sirius laughed. James was tempted to argue it further, although he didn't know why; then he realised the absurdity of the situation. “I've better things to do than to try to keep people away from notices.” He walked away, refusing to look back. The four boys took a seat in a cluster of chairs by the windows.

James gazed out onto the grounds. Why did he feel the need to provoke Evans? She hadn't done anything, as she'd written the night before, and James hadn't intended to bother her.

“James. James.” Sirius waved his hand in front of James' face. “Not again.” He pulled out his wand and prodded James.

“Ow! What was that for?” James rubbed his ribs.

“You were staring off into space. Again,” Remus supplied.

“Oh.” He furrowed his eyebrows. “So?”

“You know, James, you are clueless,” said Sirius.

“What are you talking about?”

Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance. Peter busied himself polishing his wand with his robes. Sirius leaned back in his seat and said, “If you don't know, I'm not saying a thing.”

“Right…” His friends were bizarre, but James wouldn't have had it any other way.

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After the encounter with Potter, Lily joined Emily in the library. “This is odd. I'm not dreading it,” reflected Lily upon informing Emily of the upcoming Hogsmeade visit. Emily had a very unusual coughing fit all of a sudden, prompting an inquisitive look from Lily.

Emily cleared her throat. “Sorry `bout that. There was something in my throat.”

“Right,” Lily replied uneasily. “Anyway, I think we should do something with Diana that day. I haven't gotten the chance to talk to her since term started.” Emily bit her lip. “Provided you haven't already made plans with someone,” she added hastily.

Emily took a moment to collect her thoughts. “Diana already has a date, actually. I talked to her yesterday. And I sort of have plans of my own. You don't mind if I bring someone along, do you?”

Lily nodded. “That should be okay. Adam and Matilda will be there, so it shouldn't be too awkward.”

Uncertainty flickered across Emily's face, but was quickly replaced by a reaffirming smile. “That's settled then.” She nodded slowly, but it seemed to be more for herself than for Lily. Mid-nod, she paused and cocked her head. After a moment, her eyes widened. “Have you noticed anything unusual about the Marauders this year?”

Lily gave her a quizzical look. “What?” How on earth did they go from Hogsmeade to the Marauders?

“I don't think I've seen them curse anyone that isn't in Slytherin.”

Her limited free time meant Lily didn't notice much of anything in the student population. “I see…” she said carefully.

“And you haven't been the object of their pranks, have you?”

“No, I haven't. They've ignored me, thankfully.”

Emily raised her eyebrows. “They're ignoring you?”

“Er, yes. They've yet to do anything to me. Like I said, I'm not complaining.” What did this have to do with anything?

Emily nodded again and changed the subject, but Lily remained slightly suspicious. Her friend had been acting very strange lately, now that she thought about it. She had disappeared several times that week from the common room. Lily knew for a fact that she didn't go to the library; Matilda had confirmed it. And every once in a while, she would catch Emily smiling at her, as if she knew something more than she was letting on.

Whatever it was, it seemed to have something to do with the Marauders. That didn't make sense, though, did it? Perhaps it did. Lily decided Emily was plotting to get the Marauders back for years of pranks. That provided a satisfactory explanation - she didn't tell Lily because she knew Lily would object. Lily didn't think it wise to tickle a sleeping dragon, but if Emily wanted to provoke them, that was her choice. As long as Lily didn't have to do anything, she was perfectly fine.

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That night, James relaxed against the headboard, exhausted from Quidditch practise.

I think Emily is plotting something against the Marauders.

He sat up quickly, his interest piqued. That was certainly unexpected.

Why would she do that?

I'm not sure that's what she's doing, but I know she's planning… something. But she randomly changed the topic to the Marauders today and, well, you had to see it. There was this look on her face. But I think she wants to just get them back for everything.

James furrowed his eyebrows.

That doesn't make sense.

It doesn't, does it?

They'd probably just prank you, and she knows that.

You're right. This is irritating. I wish she'd just tell me what's going on. I'm going spare.

I wish I could help.

Me too.

Try to describe what happened, maybe you missed something.

Evans recounted the conversation in the library, and told him of her other observations. He resolved to watch Emily himself the next day; James was better equipped to stealthily follow people.

I agree - it certainly seems like she's up to no good, but nothing adds up.

Thanks anyway. Oh, I forgot to ask. Have you heard any news from the Animagus student?

James grinned.

Yes, he received an Outstanding and thanks his unknown source.

So it's a boy?

Damn.

Er… no?

Don't worry, I'm not going to hunt him down or anything. It doesn't matter who he is.

There hadn't been much harm in letting her know that much, but James was still overly cautious when it came to the subject of Animagi.

That's a relief, although I could picture you spying on the boys' dormitory, waiting in the shadows for him to reveal himself.

And that's the sign that I need to go to bed. Good night, Roscoe.

You too.

Author's Note: The chapter was short and disjointed, and I apologize. It's a weird chapter. It sets up something for seventeen, and you sort of get a feel for how things have changed. Things should be more normal for the rest of the year.