Rumours

This is another challenge answer. I figured I could do a one-shot without too much distraction.

Here is the challenge, as presented by Josh at http://www.portkey.org/talk/index.php?showtopic=8933 :

Got the idea for this challenge when wading through all the drek at ff.net and the idea came to portray Harry's reaction to the thought of a relationship with one of the odd ships which pop up and since this is portkey it also occurred to me that it could also lead to warm h/hr WAFF
Harry overhears some comment which mistakenly leads him to believe that one of his enemies is secretly in love with him (i.e. Pansy, Trelawney, Draco, ect.) filled with terror he hides eventually this leads to warm H/Hr Waffyness.
Bonus points for:
-Harry hiding Under Hermione's bed and refusing to come out.
-Hermione promising to protect him from the bad suitors.
-Hermione thinking that the whole situation is funny.
-Harry hiding behind Hermione's robes.
As to why the comment was made, maybe Gred and Forge invented some sort of prank which makes you declare your undying love to the first person you see, or to your worst enemy.

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And here is my answer to this challenge:

Rumours

Hermione started awake as her door flew open. Grabbing her wand and preparing for the worst, she saw the most unexpected thing imaginable. She knew it had been a bad idea to skip breakfast to sleep in this morning -- obviously, she missed something important if people were darting into her dorm room.

A boy -- and not just any boy, but the brave and heroic Harry Potter, who she had followed since she was on the train into Hogwarts her very first year and KNEW wasn't afraid of anything -- stood in the doorway, looking absolutely terrified. His eyes were unfocused, and he seemed... panicked, about something, not just afraid. She only was able to watch him for a second, though, before he darted right under her bed.

"Harry?" she said cautiously.

"I'm NOT HERE!" he cried back.

Hermione blinked, looking under her bed. Somehow, Harry had managed to crawl into a tiny ball out of reach from her own hands. "Harry, what's wrong?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" he squeaked back. "And hush! I'm not here, like I said."

Hermione shook her head. Well, there was nothing for it -- she got up and closed the door, then sealed it with a Colloportus spell. "Harry... just how did you get in here? There's supposed to be a magical barrier preventing anyone male from entering the girls dorms."

"I don't remember," he said weakly, still from his location under the bed. "I... well, maybe I apparated. I don't remember even entering the Gryffindor tower, and certainly don't remember running up the stairs."

"You can't apparate in Hogwarts, Harry," she clucked absent-mindedly, kneeling once more so that she could peer at him under the bed. "I've closed and locked the door. You can come out, now."

"Don't wanna," he whimpered back.

"Oh, Harry... what is it?" Hermione said back, concerned. "What's wrong?"

Harry shuddered, and... were those tears. "It... it was horrible. No, worse then horrible, it was... it was... oh, I don't think there's a word for it."

Hermione winced. Surely there was a word for it -- in her experience, there was a word for everything. But what was it in Harry's case?

"Harry... just tell me. I promise I'll help you."

"I... no, you'll just laugh at me," he answered.

Oh. That was it. Suddenly, Hermione realized that the answer to her question about the proper word was "Embarrassing."

"No, Harry," Hermione said, smiling in what she hoped was a comforting way. "I promise you I won't laugh."

"I... I think it was because of one of Fred and George's prank kits -- Cupid's Questionable Quarrels, I think it was -- but the result... oh, the rumors. And the terror. I... I don't wanna go back out there. Not after this!"

So, something embarrassing happened with a GIRL. Well, that made it a bit more understandable, though Hermione still couldn't see why he was THIS terrified.
After all, even an ugly girl coming onto him should be a LITTLE flattering.

"Harry, who was it?"

"Muh... muh..."

"Millicent?" Hermione wouldn't wish Millicent Bulstrode's attentions on anyone, much less Harry. No wonder he was so upset.

"Malfoy!" he shot back, looking absolutely disgusted.

Hermione paused. She wanted to laugh. She REALLY wanted to laugh. Malfoy? Obviously, it was just some silly Weasley's Wizarding Weazes product to cause such a reaction, so there was no need to really take it seriously... but Harry seemed quite disturbed by it all.

It was funny, but not, obviously, to Harry... so she'd have to hold in her laughter for now.

"Oh, Harry... you must know he couldn't have meant it, mustn't you?"

"But that's just the thing!" Harry proclaimed. "Suddenly, EVERYONE started talking about how they knew, all along, that... that HE had obviously been in l-love with me for some time, and that was why he kept harassing us all the time, and... and... oh, God, Hermione -- they're going to be talking about this forever. And they're ALL going to say Malfoy and I are dating -- they were already chanting 'Draco and Harry, sitting in a tree' when I left!"

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Who is 'they?'"

"The entire Great Hall at breakfast," Harry sighed. "Everyone. The whole school."

"Oh, Harry," Hermione sighed, crawling under the bed to give him an awkward hug. "You know they were saying that to make fun of Malfoy, not you, right?"

"But they weren't just making fun of Malfoy," Harry protested, pulling her even further under the bed so he could return her hug. "They were making fun of me, too... and while I can usually handle that, well... what they were saying...."

"Harry," she sighed. "It wasn't you. Trust me on this. But if you really want to stop the rumors... I'll help you. But you have to come out from under my bed, okay?"

"O... okay. If you'll help me."

With that, the pair scooted out from under the bed, dusted themselves off, and stood up.

Suddenly, the door burst open -- again, and despite Hermione's Colloportus spell. Just what was it about that door not holding a lock, anyway? Regardless, before she could even see who it was, Harry darted behind her, pulling the loose robe he dressed in out so he could hide behind it.

"Hermione!" a breathless Ginny Weasley, her cheeks flushed with what was likely laughter. "Have you heard the news about Draco... and... Harry. Harry?" Harry twitched, making himself look even smaller behind Hermione's robes. "Harry, what are you doing here?"

"Meep!" he squeaked. By now, the robe was in danger of falling off of her if the knot in her fuzzy belt slipped. Which it might, if he pulled it any more in the effort to hide himself.

"Er, Ginny," Hermione said, struggling to keep the laughter out of her voice. "We'll be down in a moment. I need to get dressed."

Ginny's eyes widened. "Oh... OH! Of course. Um... congrats, I guess..."

With that, the door closed once more. Shaking her head, Hermione turned around... letting the knot break and her robes part slightly. She knew that, if Harry were to look, he'd see she wasn't wearing a bra and that she wore tighty-whitey panties. She wasn't concerned, though... she wasn't showing anything a bathing suit wouldn't show, since her now parted robe and the aforementioned panties were covering the important bits.

"Oh, Harry," Hermione sighed. He looked absolutely adorable, terrified like he was. She wouldn't let him stay terrified, though. "Don't worry. I'll protect you from all the bad suitors -- you don't have to hide." She leaned over -- possibly flashing him, but she didn't care -- and gave him a fairly passionate kiss. As she did, she reached up for his own uniform robe's clasps. "And, well, I think we'd better get started on breaking those rumors about you being gay, don't you?"

The next time someone walked in on them -- in this case, Lavender -- the new rumors around school had nothing to do with Malfoy. And they involved a bit more than kissing.

And both Harry and Hermione were quite satisfied that they were all true, too.