The House-Weasel

Disclaimer: I own nothing, except the plot.

The House-Weasel

Chapter 1: Absolute Chaos

Oh dear. Ginny Weasley was completely baffled. After all, it wasn't every day one found oneself affronted with a stampede of grim-faced House-Elves marching proudly down the corridors, loud squeaks emitting from their mouths. Was that normal?
" Bloody hell!" Ginny turned toward her brother, a What-the-hell-is-going-on look on her face.
" I dunno, Ginny, don't ask me!" he backed away, hands in front of him, as he watched the House-Elves in amazement.
" Why the hell would they have a parade?" Ron asked dubiously, scratching his hair.
" Maybe it's someone's birthday." Harry said, coming up from behind Ron. Soon, quite a few people had arrived, some angry at the delay, some quite amused by the tiny creatures' odd ways.
All the while, Hermione Granger stood there; eyes fixed on them, jumping up and down with excitement-or joy, whichever it was. Of course they all thought she had gone batty, but after all, she did have a strange fascination with House-Elves, so it seemed, so they thought it would be better to just leave her alone.
At long last, when everyone had started getting annoyed with the show, Professor Dumbledore arrived in all his glory, looking amused and wise. Ron poked him.
" Sir, what's going on here?" From beside him, Hermione had stopped jumping up and down to take time to roll her eyes.
" Isn't it obvious? They're on strike, Ronald." She sighed exasperatedly, looking at him as if he had the brain of a flobberworm. Which, Ginny thought, he did.
"Strike??" he repeated, alarm heavy in his voice. Hermione nodded fervently.
" Yea, isn't it exciting?" she gushed, clasping her hands together. Dumbledore chuckled.
"Strike?? But that'snot possiblefor House-Elves." Ron trailed off, muttering incoherently about House-Elves and how stupid they were. Hermione fumed slightly.
" I-I think it's wonderful that they're on strike." She announced finally, looking haughtily at Ron. Ron waved a hand, indicating that he did not really care.
"Pfft. Of course you do, Herm. No one cares."
"Ronald-"
"Please desist, children." His grave voice interrupted. His spectacles hung low on the bridge of his nose as his blue eyes stared intently at the two arguing children, though they were still laughing eyes. Hermione shuffled her feet, feeling ashamed, and Ron turned slightly red, glaring at the wise, sagely headmaster.
"Headmaster, surely you wouldn't let the House-Elves go on strike, right?" Ron asked, nodding as if urging him to do the same. Dumbledore sighed.
" Well, I'm afraid I can't make them work, Mr. Weasley." The change in Ron and Harry from those two words was enormous. First their shoulders slouched, followed by their jaws dropping open as pouts crossed their faces.
"But-food!!" Harry cried, as he had grown quite accustomed to the nightly visits to the kitchen.
Hermione laughed. Shooting a rather feral glare at the bushy haired girl, Ron stomped angrily over to the mob of House-Elves and gently prodded one.
" Ron, what're you doing? Don't!" Hermione warned, reaching out for him-but it was too late.
The House-Elf had already turned around, glaring fiercely, brown eyes wide and full of anger and determination.
"What do you want?" he squeaked. Ron, who had been defiant only seconds ago now stood speechless for a moment-only a moment, for he had never heard a House-Elf talk to him this way.
"Uh-" Punch.
"Speak quickly, stupid, ugly boy!" he barked, ears standing straight as he strained to stand taller-acting menacingly.
" Why are you on strike, House-Elf?" Ron asked rather stupidly. Ginny covered her face with her hand. Her brother sounded so stupid-'Why are you on strike, House-Elf?'-it very much sounded like a corny and obvious line from a children's picture book.
The House-Elf's eyebrow, (as Ginny noticed that they indeed had eyebrows) rose and stared at the redhead curiously.
"Because you treat House-Elves like dirt, and we don't like it!" he nodded, squinting his eyes at Ron, before turning around with a I-will-no-longer-associate-with-you look, and marched on.
Ron stood there, scratching his red hair. Hermione let out a sob and rushed over to him.
"Ron you idiot!!" she shrieked shrilly, hair bouncing as she jumped up and down. " Why must you be so insensitive?" Ron opened his mouth to protest, but Hermione held a finger up and quieted him.
" ' Because I'm a boy' isn't a valid reason." She added. Clearing her throat, she continued, getting into full rant mode.
" Why don't you understand? It's not right to support such slavery-especially at such a prestigious school as Hogwarts, that is under the rule of the great Professor Dumbledore. Imagine if you were a House-Elf and people ordered you around, refusing to pay you afterwards. Would you like it?" Hermione looked at Ron earnestly in her I'm-Perfectly-Logical face.
"Yes." Ron said, only saying to get Hermione worked up. " I would." Hermione went cow-eyed and began screaming a horrible tantrum at the boy, and while her words were rather slurred, Ginny managed to pick up a few words like, ' Pig', 'Insensitive prick', and 'liar'. Dumbledore chuckled, and once more commanded immediate silence with his hand.
"I couldn't help but overhear your argument, Mr. Weasley, Miss Granger, and I would like to point out, that since you two are so willing to try for the House-Elf position, I'm sure I could make such things happen-after all, what with the House-Elves gone, who will clean the castle?" A glazed look came over the headmaster's eyes as he pondered this.
Hermione beamed. Ron gaped at him.
"B-but" he stuttered, trying to think of something rather intelligent to say. Hermione smirked and turned toward him, eyebrows raised.
"What's wrong? I thought you said you wouldn't mind being a House-Elf." She nudged him. " Go on then!"
"But-I can't cook, Hermione." Ron spat after some hesitation. Dumbledore smiled his vague smile yet again.
"Ah, but you won't have to, Mr. Weasley. I'm afraid I cannot trust my students to cook satisfactory meals for the school."
"You're making me be a House-Elf? You're making me??" Ron asked incredulously. Dumbledore shook his head.
" No, not making you, Mr. Weasley-just offering you the chance. This is absolutely voluntary, of course. However, I don't see a reason not to, since you yourself admitted that you wouldn't mind being a House-Elf. Why not contribute to your dear school?" His half-moon spectacles gleamed in the dusk light mischievously, and Ginny was sure that inside his head he was laughing rather manically.
" Nah, I don't think-" Ron chose that moment to glance at Hermione, who was glaring so fiercely at him, it made him go promptly white. The look she was sending said very clearly: You better say yes, Ronald Weasley, if you value your puny life.
"Alright." He squeaked, quaking in fear. Ginny couldn't help but roar with laughter at his ill fate.
"Good Ron! You've already got the squeak part down pat! I expect you'll be talking in third person, by saynext week, hmm?" Ginny teased, eyes dancing with malice. Oh, how fun it was to tease her dear ole brother. But the fun, as always, did not last long.
" Say, Ginny, why don't you join us?" Hermione asked sincerely, eyes begging her to say yes. Ginny stopped laughing and stared at her.
"Er" Ron grinned widely at the prospect.
"Yea, why don't you, little sister?" he asked, grinning nastily. Ginny began backing away.
"I'd love to, but I'm busy" she replied, faking a sickly sweet smile. Hermione's face fell with disappointment, but she did not relent. Leaning in towards the smaller girl, she whispered quietly.
"I can't stand him alone, Gin, won't you help me bear the agony?" Hermione asked, lip turning out in a pout. And realization hit her. Again, her fun had turned its back on her. There was nowhere out of it.
"Alright." She muttered, looking down at her worn shoes, wishing she were deaf so that she did not hear the words that she had spoken. However, at those words, Dumbledore beamed.
"Harry? What about you?" he asked. Harry looked uncomfortable all of a sudden, as he had been quiet all along, and he fidgeted slightly, playing with his glasses, acting as if he hadn't heard. Ron, who at first had been severely annoyed, seemed to be enjoying the fact that others would be sharing his torture.
"Yea, Harry, c'mon! Best friends stick together, right?" he asked. Harry did not reply. Ron sniffed and turned away slightly, hands in his pockets. "Unless we're not friends" he trailed off.
" No! No! You are definitely my friend, Ron." Harry rushed to answer, waving his hands indicate that he was wrong. Ron smiled.
"I knew it, old chap! You always were loyal, faithful, and a great friend." Harry's smile disappeared.
"Ah-then I shall report this great news to Professor McGonagall, who is to be in charge of this affair, and you shall receive your wonderful uniforms tomorrow." Dumbledore looked about the four proudly.
"Cleaning the dorms and castle will not be easy with just four of you. I am hoping more people will volunteer" he trailed off, face looking suddenly distant and troubled.
"So many things to doso many burdens" he muttered.
But then, only a moment later, his bright smile was back on his aged face. Hermione was the only one who returned the smile, as the other three were too busy sulking. And before they strutted away to their common room where they could yell and fight all they wanted (certainly more so than right in front of the headmaster), something heavy flew into the air and hit Ron's head. Another fell at Harry's feet, and one fell down Ginny's shirt.
"What the-"
"Cool!"
"Ack!!"
"That was your first pay." Hermione said as she walked over to them, a gold galleon clutched tightly in her palm. Ron's eyes went wide, almost as if bearing the dollar signs as in cartoons, and he quickly snatched the item off of his head, staring at it's gold-ness with love in his eyes. Harry shrugged and pocketed his coin, and Ginny dug in her shirt frantically, trying to find it.
"Want me to help you find it, Gin?" Harry asked slyly, stepping closer to her.
" Oh no you don't, Harry-you will NOT have your hands stuck down my sister's shirt! Bastard!" Ron yelled irritably, particularly in a bad mood because of the whole affair, and he kicked his friend in the shins, making the poor boy yowl in pain. Ginny giggled, feeling a blush coming on at the suggestive words, and beamed when she, at last, found the coin.
" Let's go already!" Hermione whined, quickly growing impatient of the boy's romp, rolling her eyes at the ceiling. Ron didn't answer, but after running a hand through his hair, ran ahead down the corridor, mumbling and looking strangely cross-eyed.
"This was a bloody great day-first, I fail that test, then I get turned into a House-Elf, not to mention I no more kitchen raids, and then my best friend gets all suggestive on my sister!" Turning toward the three, he smiled sarcastically.
"Tell me when the pigs start flying, ok?"
Soon he was out of sight-and thank god.
Harry still sat on the floor, trying to get a good look at his shin. Hermione clucked her tongue at Harry after staring distastefully after Ron, and she knelt beside him.
"Are you ok, Harry?" she asked, lifting up the leg of his pants to examine the damage. Sure enough, there was a large, purple bruise forming rapidly on his pale, smooth skin.
"That's horrible!" Ginny gasped, feeling rather shocked that her brother would kick his best friend so harshly. So cruelly. So violently. Harry grinned sheepishly.
"Happens all the time." He said rather cheerfully. Hermione just clucked her tongue again.
"You let your best friend abuse you, eh?" Ginny asked, hands on her hips, feeling the anger rise to her throat.
"Er-"
"Why when I get my hands on that little bit-"
"Ginny!" Hermione yelled exasperatedly. Ginny shut up, biting her tongue. Looking both of them squarely in the eye, Hermione shook her head.
"I've had enough mood swings for one day" she went on mumbling, before some distinct words could be heard. Throwing her hands up she cried, "and honestly, it's only the girls that get PMS!" Harry blushed looked away, humming quietly, acting as if he hadn't heard. Ginny felt very peeved by now.
"Hermione-shut up!" And for once, Hermione did.
Soon, all chaos had calmed down slightly as the three reached Gryffindor common room, and they were quite pleased to find that the common room was quite empty, save a few straggling students that were studying.
Ron seemed to be among them, sitting forlornly on the shabby couch, the corners of his mouth twitching and his ears tinged red-a sure sign that he was very angry. And angry at what? Probably his life.
Harry slinked off to his dorm, thinking Ron was mad at him, and thought that he had best stay out of his way. Heck, everyone in Gryffindor tower thought that they should stay away from the biting weasel that night. Even Hermione had given up on governing the wretched old fool, though she sighed heavily every so often.
When at last everyone had gone up to their dorm, Ginny and Hermione stayed down, books on their laps as they tried to study. The odd silence ended as Ginny promptly slammed her book on the desk.
"Hermione-I have to tell you something." She said quietly, taking a deep breath. Hermione looked up, reading glasses perched on the tip of her nose, making her look even more intelligent.
"You know, about the whole 'House-Elf' volunteer thing" Ginny trailed off, licking her lips as she searched for the right words.
"You think it's a great idea?" Hermione suggested brightly.
"No, not quite" The brown haired girl's face fell.
"Youdon't want to do it?" she asked meekly. Ginny shook her head fervently.
"No, not at all!"
"Thenwhat?" Ginny sighed, resting her head on her hand.
" Ijust feel embarrassed and so uncomfortable about doing such a thingI mean, imagine if Malfoy found out that both Weasley's were doing this kind of service-he'd never let us hear the end of it!" Ginny threw up her hands and contorted her face in disgust. Hermione put a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder.
"Don't worry about him-ignore him Ginny. Just think of all the good we'll be doing for the school." Hermione sat back in her chair, satisfied at her words. And yet Ginny still got that odd squirmy feeling in her stomach, the kind you got the night before a huge piano recital, or right before you did something you knew you were going to regret
"Oh! Look at the time!" Hermione jumped out of her chair, grabbing her books, and after waving goodbye to Ginny, she trotted up the stairs, humming a happy tune, and obviously sure about what she wanted to do. Which left Ginny to sit alone by the fire of the common room, banging her head on the desk repeatedly, chiding herself for giving in so easily.
Sure, she would be doing 'good' for the school. Sure, that would be good on her records. But was all that even close to being worth the tarnishing of her reputation, the jeering, the humiliation and utter embarrassment? No.
But now that she had gotten herself into this, she couldn't just back out. That wouldn't be right, and she would be disappointing many along the way. Plus, Dumbledore might ask for his money back.
Clenching her fists determinedly, she nodded. On a few conditions, she would work. One being not being assigned to clean the Slytherin dorms.
Just imagine the look on the blonde's face if he had found out about Ginny Weasley becoming a true weasel-y servant.
Sneering, smirking, laughing.
With absolutely no cheerful thoughts in her head, she headed towards bed, her shoulders sagged with the new burden that had been laid so mercilessly upon her.
What had she gotten herself into??

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