Full of Grace
A/N: More angst. Told from Ginny's point of view, for now.
Warning: Contains attempted suicide.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or the song "Full of Grace" by Sarah Mclachlan.
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The winter here's cold, and bitter
It's chilled us to the bone
Ginny stared out the window of the hospital wing.
`How many times have I been here,' she thought, `watching someone I love fight for their life?'
A week earlier, Firenze had walked out of the Forbidden Forest, carrying an unconscious Harry in his arms. Seeing the centaur, one of the students, a fifth year in the Magical Creatures class alerted Hagrid, who in turn had alerted the rest of the staff. Firenze had brought Harry up to the Hospital Wing, and for the past week he had lain in bed, not moving, hardly breathing. He seemed dead.
For all intents and purposes he was dead.
We haven't seen the sun for weeks
Too long too far from home
Ginny had been there when Hermione was told about it.
Hermione had gone white. Then she had run out of class.
But not towards the Hospital Wing.
She ran towards the lake.
All the professors had said to leave her alone. That she needed time to work up the courage to see him.
They were wrong.
Ginny knew it.
I feel just like I'm sinking
And I claw for solid ground
But no one listened to her.
And now she was keeping watch over TWO friends.
But she didn't know why.
And she feared that she never would.
Ron dropped by and said hello, bringing a fresh bouquet of flowers for Hermione, and a box of Bertie Bott's for Harry. Ginny nodded to her brother, and after nodding back, he left.
Professor McGonagall had also stopped by, asking Madame Pomfrey quietly what, if any, change had occurred.
None had.
And it looked like it would stay that way.
I'm pulled down by the undertow
I never thought I could feel so low
Oh darkness I feel like letting go
Even Draco had come in to see the two. He and Ginny got into an argument about why exactly he was there and in his anger, blurted out something he had seen.
When Ginny checked, she found that he was telling the truth.
If all of the strength and all of the courage
Come and lift me from this place
She had tried to question him further, but he didn't respond. When she yelled at him, he didn't respond.
And when she slapped him…
Nothing.
There was nothing.
I know I can love you much better than this
Full of grace
Full of grace
My love
`Why!?' Ginny thought, `why can't he be happy? Why can't he have peace?'
`Merlin knows he deserves it.'
Leaving the hospital ward behind her, she walked out to the lake.
Where she found it.
It was small, and delicate.
It was plain, and clean.
It was perfect.
`So why is it here? Is this what she came looking for?'
So it's better this way, I said
Having seen this place before
There was one other who had seen what Draco had seen.
Neville.
And what he told her, stunned her beyond belief.
Harry had proposed to Hermione.
And Hermione had said no.
No.
What a simple word.
Yet it commands so much power.
Harry had thrown the ring out into the lake and then run off in the direction of the Forbidden Forest.
He ran so fast.
Speed borne of desperation.
Of hopelessness.
Where everything we say and do
Hurts us all the more
When Firenze had brought Harry back, he was bruised and covered in blood. Firenze had explained that it was not HIS blood, but Harry's. Turning over Harry's arm had revealed a long slash down his arm.
Ginny gazed at Harry, who still lay motionless on his cot.
The slash had been healed.
The scar would remain there forever.
`Why,' she thought again, `why can't he be happy?'
And she thought, `Why did Hermione say no?'
It's just that we stayed, too long
In the same old sickly skin
More people visited the Hospital Wing.
Every day, more people.
She wanted to scream at them, curse them and hex them.
`You caused this!' she screamed in her mind, `You caused this! You're not sad because a young man is laying here dying! You're sad because your "savior" is dying! Because you're too afraid to do anything yourself! You're not sad that a young woman is dying! You're only here because Harry protected you! He protected you and saved you and you did nothing but scorn him and call him an attention-seeking brat!'
I'm pulled down by the undertow
I never thought I could feel so low
Oh darkness I feel like letting go
When they found Hermione, she had not been breathing.
She had run into the lake, and sank like a stone.
The squid had brought her lifeless body to the surface.
Ginny had followed her.
Ginny had screamed when she saw Hermione.
Pale.
Lips blue.
Eyes closed.
Not breathing.
Her scream brought professors.
Professors brought questions.
But the questions brought no answers.
If all of the strength
And all of the courage
Come and lift me from this place
The only people who brought "gifts" for Hermione were Ron, Ginny, and Neville.
Everyone else was too concerned with the health of their "Hero" that they didn't notice the young woman.
At night, Ginny wept.
For the young woman.
For the young man.
Silently.
I know I could love you much better than this
Full of grace
Full of grace
My love
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A/N: It'll get better! I swear!
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