Four Little Words

Chapter Twenty-Seven

After waking up on Remus' couch without a single memory of what transpired the day before (but a massive headache), Lily was quite embarrassed and ashamed of herself. Remus explained to her that all he knew was that somehow she ended up back at Hogwarts "in a right state" and that James got a letter asking him to come pick her up. He was, unfortunately, busy with Sirius, so he sent along Remus to go get her.

The first thing Lily did was write an owl of apology to Dorcas' parents, and then agreed to meet with them as soon as she could get to their house. She apologized profusely when she met them for not talking to them sooner, but they were understanding, telling her that it was a difficult time for her as wel. Lily told them an edited version of Dorcas' last moments (she didn't have the heart to tell them that she was dreaming of marriage) and they were content to learn that Dorcas was happy before she passed, and they made it exceedingly clear to Lily that they did not blame her in the least.

Lily returned to work that same afternoon that she spoke with Dorcas' parents, simply because there was no other choice. She had a mountain of paperwork to sort through, not to mention she'd gotten a small note from Dumbledore requesting her attendance at a very private meeting in his office. So private that after she read it, the note burst into a flame with a tiny poof.

So she buried herself in her work until the clock on her wall began edging close to ten at night. She had filled out nearly three-quarters of the stack that she needed to fill out, and her hand was sufficiently aching before she sat back and decided that it was time to go.

The letter requested that she use the fireplace at Hogsmeade, as others would be using different methods of transportation. Apparently, this was a meeting of extreme importance, which shocked Lily as to how important she was to be invited. Wondering why Dumbledore held her in such high esteem (especially after the spectacle she made of herself the day before), Lily pulled on her coat and Floo'ed over to Hogsmeade.

The Three Broomsticks was quiet, as it was a late, weekday evening. Lily brushed off her robes and was adjusting herself when she heard someone addressing her.

"Not drinking again, are we?" came a snorting voice from the table next to the fireplace. Lily looked up and blushed.

"For your information, Sirius, I am doing something….other than drinking," she finished lamely. She was about to announce to him that she was going to go visit Dumbledore, but she figured that it would be prudent to tell the world that she was going to a very secret meeting.

"I see," Sirius nodded. "Well, as it so happens, I too am doing something other than drinking, so why don't I just tag along like a little puppy?"

Lily brushed herself off some more and snorted. "Well, I suppose you could."

"Lovely," he grinned, throwing his arm around her and leading her out of the pub. Lily giggled and leaned against him slightly. She hadn't really seen him since before Dorcas died, and she wasn't sure about this happy front.

She reached up and clasped the hand that was around her shoulder and gave him a comforting smile. "Are you all right?"

"Fine why wouldn't I be?" Sirius asked, looking ahead in the dark night.

"You never came to talk to me," Lily said, quietly. "I thought that you would-"

Sirius sighed and held her a bit tighter. "I didn't…."

"Did you talk to Dorcas' family?" Lily asked.

"Hell no," Sirius shook his head. "They've hated me ever since they found out that we weren't dating."

"So….they didn't tell you what I told them?" she asked, biting her lip.

"No, why?" Sirius asked.

Lily sighed. "Because I didn't tell them the whole truth about what happened before Dorcas died."

"Eh?" Sirius blinked.

"I told them that she and I were discussing Auror things, and drinking coffee and tea, and nothing really extraordinary or profound," Lily bit her lip. "But that's not the whole truth."

"What were you talking about?" Sirius asked, knowing what the answer would be.

"Do you want to know?"

"Would I ask if I didn't?"

"The last thing she said to me," Lily whispered. "Was that if you married her and James married me, that we…well, we would be sisters of sorts."

Sirius' face was stony. "It's just as well, then, I guess."

"Why's that?"

"Because you know as well as I do, and she knew too, I'd never marry her."

"Sirius!" Lily growled.

"It wasn't her, and you know it," Sirius said, as they crossed the gates into Hogwarts. The castle was completely black save for a few lights still on. "I'm not the marrying type. I never have been I never will be. Call it my psychotic upbringing, but I can't... marry anyone."

Lily bit her lip. "I feel as if I could have done something."

"Lily, if you had gone in with her," Sirius held her a bit tighter. "You would have been dead alongside her."

"But why should I be alive and she should be dead?" Lily looked up at him. "How is that fair?"

"It's not," Sirius shook his head, thinking of Gideon and Fabian. "None of this is fair. It's not fair that those two little boys will never know their uncles who saved their lives. It's not fair that Marlene's brother-in-law lost everyone on a single pleasure cruise. It's not fair that you lost your family, and that your little brother never got to practice with his wand."

Lily was silent as Sirius put his hand on the door to the school. "Which is why you and I are going in here," he smirked, opening it. "So we can prevent this from happening again."

When they walked into Dumbledore's office, Lily was even more surprised to only see three other people in the room. The first, James, was quite pleased to see Sirius walking with Lily, and she was sure that he'd been badgering him to go talk to her. The second, Moody, merely snorted at their entrance, as if he didn't think either of them was worthy of being at this meeting. The third, Dumbledore, welcomed them in.

"We are waiting for one final guest," he explained. "He had to take many measures to get here without anyone knowing."

Dumbledore checked his watch and looked up as the door opened and Snape walked in, looking quite perturbed.

"The hell is going on here?!" Sirius spat, brandishing his wand out of habit. James was by his side, doing the same.

"Sirius, please, sit down," Dumbledore said, calmly. "Severus is here on my wishes-"

"Why?!" James said, in disbelief.

"Because Potter, he wished me to be here," Snape spat back, maliciously.

"Severus-" Dumbledore warned. "He is here because he is going to help us-"

"I don't like it either, Albus," Moody grumbled, pointing his finger at Snape. "How can you be sure that he isn't going to lead us into a trap?"

"Alastor-"

"Yeah! I would be so sure that he isn't here spying for Voldemort right now!" Sirius accused.

Dumbledore stood up, which was enough to quiet everyone. James and Sirius plopped back down onto the squishy couch on either side of Lily and Moody sat back in his chair. A bit more cautiously, Snape sat on his chair as well. Dumbledore was the last to sit, slowly sliding down into his chair again and stared at them as if he was mildly perturbed by the interruption.

"Severus," he continued, "is here on my wishes because he is willing to give us information on the plans of Lord Voldemort. He is doing so at great personal risk, as well."

Sirius snorted. Lily elbowed him roughly.

"I had no doubts that you would be very concerned about my choice in spy," Dumbledore's eyes swept over James and Sirius who were eyeing Snape with the utmost loathing, and he the same. "However, James, Sirius, you above all others should be thanking Snape."

"Why's that?" James' head snapped. Sirius not so much, because he already knew, he just didn't want to admit it.

"Because, Potter, I spared your precious little girlfriend," Snape spat. It was Lily's turn to be surprised and she stared at him.

"What?" she said, sitting up and staring at him.

"Severus was the one who brought you to my office yesterday when you were - erm- less than at your usual self," Dumbledore's eyes twinkled slightly. James' face was getting flustered; he kept looking from Snape to Lily, not knowing who to be madder at. Lily's face was also getting red because she was embarrassed that Severus, of all people, had to take care of her.

"Sirius, your brother remains without suspicion in Voldemort's circle," Dumbledore reminded him. "Severus has not let anyone know of the information you found out through your alternate means."

Sirius looked away, grumbling.

"What about me?"Moody grumbled. "What's he done for me?"

"Why, Alastor," Dumbledore said, eyes twinkling. "I assumed that you would trust my judgement without question, being as you are the older and wiser Auror."

James and Sirius looked affronted; Snape gave a satisfied snort. Moody just sighed. "Get on with it then, Albus."

"Severus?" Dumbledore looked over pleasantly.

"I haven't been able to find out much," Snape began, slowly and calculating. "Those closest to the Dark Lord are excited about something that is apparently quite a big secret. They've gotten a hold of some information that the Dark Lord has been wanting for some time, something about the Order."

James and Sirius exchanged glances over Lily's head.

"I know they are planning to attack and that they are expecting the Aurors to show up, so they are not being careful who they tell about the fact that they are planning an attack. I have not done enough to warrant a higher position in his ranks," Snape explained. "So I cannot tell you any more than that."

Lily swallowed. She wondered which of the Aurors were going to die during this battle.

"Although, this information that the Dark Lord has...this spy that he keeps relying on...is very high up apparently," he threw a nasty look to James and Sirius who threw one back.

"As I have feared," Dumbledore closed his eyes. "And which is why I only allowed these people to know that you are on our side."

"Why them?" Moody looked over to the three on the couch.

"Because Lily is a highly skilled healer, and should Severus suffer any damage, she will be able to heal him quickly and quietly," Dumbledore said, his eyes landing on Lily. She felt her face heat up; so Dumbledore thought she was a good healer?

"Why them, then?" Moody asked the other two.

"Because, James, Sirius, and Severus have an-erm- long history together, and I feared that they might try very hard to find him in battle if they did not know that he was on our side."

"Professor Dumbledore, I doubt that is going to make any difference," Lily sighed, helplessly, watching the three of them glare at each other.

"Severus, you will need to return before anyone notices your disappearance," Dumbledore nodded. "I would return the way that you arrived. There will be what you need where you arrived."

Snape nodded and left the office, without speaking.

"As for the rest of you," Dumbledore turned to them. "A plea for trust of Severus might be a bit too much to ask for right now, but I do ask that you trust my decision."

Lily was eyeing the door hopefully. "Professor, may I-" she asked, feeling very much like she was back in school.

Dumbledore nodded and Lily left the office while he gave some instructions to Moody and probably another admonishment to James and Sirius. Meanwhile, Lily was running to catch up with Snape.

She saw his skinny form sliding down the hallway, looking around the dark castle almost longingly. She reached him, breathless, and called out his name. He stopped, and turned around, a frown on his face.

"What?" he asked.

"I..." Lily said, still trying to catch her breath from running. "I wanted to thank you."

"For?"

"For not...erm...well you know," Lily blushed. "Yesterday."

Snape snorted. "I didn't do it out of pity." He turned to continue walking.

"Why did you do it then?" Lily asked, reaching out to put her hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Because," Snape began, but had not an answer for her.

"Oi!" James said, turning a corner. He'd been concerned when Lily had run out of the room, so he was following her. "Snivellus-"

"James!" Lily hissed at him.

"I don't care what Dumbledore says-" James said, angrily. "You're still a greasy little traitor. In fact, I'm going to trust you less now because you've already shown that you can be a traitor!"

"Did you think of that all by yourself, Potter, or did you remember it verbatim from Moody?" Snape jeered.

"Severus!" Lily said, standing in-between them. They were getting closer and closer to each other as if nearly on the brink of tearing each other's throats out.

"Don't think I won't be gunning for you, Snivellus, because you know I have good aim-" James growled. "Maybe you'd like to show off your nasty underwear to the other Death Eaters?!"

"Maybe you'd rather I killed your girlfriend instead of saving her? I could do it now-"

"GRAH!!" Lily roared, pushing them both back with a force that she herself wasn't sure she had. "You both make me sick!!" she screamed, staring at them with a mad gleam in her eye. "You are so immature that you can't get over your petty differences. There is a war going on, people are dying, and you want a repeat of fifth year?"

She turned to James. "I thought you had changed, Potter, but you still are an arrogant toerag!"

She turned to Snape who was smirking at James' tongue lashing. "And you, Severus! You...just...GRAH!" She let another primal scream of rage and stormed off, angrily, the portraits on the walls cowering in fear.

James left his wand out. "You'd just better watch yourself," he growled at Snape.

Snape snorted and continued walking.

SGR's Note: For a deeper explanation of Snape's actions, look to the writing journal.