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It's Raining For You
By Dana
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We used to sit out here in the cold
Watching and feeling the falling rain
We used to talk for hours in the wet
Because the water vanished the pain
We used to sit together here
Shoulder to shoulder, side to side
We used to talk about everything
There was nothing we did not hide
The rain became a soothing friend
Carrying away the troubles and sorrow
We forgot about everything here
Even the war of tomorrow
Our pain became apart of the storm
The water used to cover our lonely tear
We could get lost in our saddening thoughts
You and I out here
But now it's only I
Sitting alone with my pain
Now that you're gone I cry
And the tears become the rain
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It was raining.
Not the simple sprinkling that had been falling for the past week, but more like a waterfall of raindrops, falling freely from the dark sky. Clouds were built up as if they were great walls, keeping the sunlight from shining down to the broken world. Thunder cracked across the lands. And lightning streaked along the dark, stormy sky.
The only noise was of the rain falling to the stone beneath her feet and the thunder rumbling from the heavens above. The icy winds whipped through the swaying trees of the looming forest in the distance, and reached up to her on the highest tower.
From this point, she could see the snowy mountains in the horizon and watch as the sky darkened and the clouds thickened on top of the lands. She watched as ripples ran across the surface of the lake as the raindrops fell. Everything seemed so different up here. So natural.
She shivered from the cold but didn't bother to move. Her hair sagged down past her shoulders and hung across her face. Her robes were thick with freezing water and clung to her body with a sticky grip. Still she sat there as the storm ploughed on and the rain fell continuously down; mingling with her silent tears.
She had always liked the rain.
Capable of washing away so many things; the dirt covering the grass, the litter stuck in the garden - and the infernal tears that always seemed to fall. It was a beautiful thing, and it had always captivated her beyond belief. She never understood how many people hated it when it rained; she believed the tiny drops falling were the tears of those that had died, crying to wash away the evil in the world.
When she had been younger, she would always sneak out of the house and sit on the back steps, just letting the rain fall down to her and run along her exposed flesh. No one really understood why she liked it so much; she just did.
And now she had another reason to sit out in the rain, with her own tears falling with those of people long gone. The rain never judged her; never told her what to do. She could tell it her deepest, darkest secrets with no regret. She could remember things more clearly when the rain was running down her face. That was why she was sitting here, right now, at the top of the tallest tower, waiting for the single piece of serenity that was promised to come.
Lightning forked down from the nightmarish ceiling of rolling clouds and icy winds. It struck down at the green fields, to illuminate a place she knew so well. From this spot, she could clearly see the reflection of the sky on the surface of the great lake; just as dark and foreboding as the one above her. She watched how the tall and mighty trees of the Forbidden Forest parted with the strong winds, revealing a little part of its mystery.
And as her dark eyes roamed across the lands of the ancient castle, her breath caught in her throat. The backs of her eyes began to sting and a cold shiver ran through her body, one not associated with the falling rain.
Everything about this place she had come to love, reminded her of times never to come again. And of people never again to walk across the sloping lawns.
Her eyes caught on a single spot below her and they filled with glistening tears, that slipped and ran down her cheeks, running with the rain still falling.
A tree, lonely and swaying, was the centre of her attention. It sat on the shore of the lake, like a tiny flag of surrender waving in the winds. It stood tall, with its bright green leaves dimmed by the onslaught of rain. The ground at its trunk was wet and muddy, the grass sticking defiantly out. But she was not entranced by the simple beauty of it. No. She was caught in memories of it, playing through her mind like a tape on fast - forward.
So many times, she had sat at the base of that tall oak. And so many times she had laughed beneath its strong branches, on the morning of a bright sunny day. And so many times she had thought about that tree; meaning nothing to others, but all so much to her.
Many days she had sat beneath the swaying limbs, upon the grassy ground, just staring into the depths of the Great Lake. And those times had been spent in deep thought, thinking about the times she had sat, not alone beneath that tree, but with one other.
All through her years at Hogwarts, on weekends and some nights when thoughts got too hard to handle, she had escaped to this single spot with her dear friends. It had been the one time and place, where the three of them could enjoy the company of each other, and forget all other problems haunting their lives.
It had been the one place where she could forget about the worry and pain inside her, and just relish the feeling of happiness.
Of course, those days were over and she would never again sit beneath that tree in happiness. From now on, if she dared go near it, she would only think of the joy she used to feel and remember the pain that now replaced it.
So she stared at that tree, so full of memories that haunted her, while her tears fell freely from her tortured brown eyes.
She remembered a time when all three of them had been together. Laughing, smiling, sitting in the sunshine of a new Spring Day. It had been one of the few times that they had been happy, despite the darkening times. She remembered feeling so light and free, as if nothing would ever tear them apart. But, as always, something did.
It hurt her to think about it more than anything on earth could ever. Thinking about that day, caused her breath to catch in her throat and her fragile body to shake endlessly. Tears would spill, salty and stinging, down her cheeks, sparkling in the light. She tried not to think about it, but it was harder than trying not to breathe; you couldn't. It hurt her to remember, but it pained her even more to forget. Each was more frightening than the other was, and just as painful.
There was always a pain deep inside her, a hole filled with sorrow and tremendous pain; a constant reminder of what once filled that spot. What once completed her life. But it was gone now. Gone like the stars in morning. Gone like the puddles into the earth. Gone like her heart.
A loud clap of thunder covered her wailing cry, and the tears were washed from her face by the falling rain.
It had been a single week; seven short days; one hundred and sixty-eight hours, since she had last seen him.
And it seemed like an eternity.
It had been a usual Monday morning. He had greeted her at breakfast, grinning that lopsided grin that he reserved only for her. He had seemed so happy that morning, so free and weightless. Little did he know how that would change. Little did any of them know. Ron had slept in late, as usual, missing his first class; Potions. Severus Snape had been absent that day, a substitute filling in for his class. They had found it strange, but thought nothing of it.
It wasn't until the potion master's body appeared at the edge of the Forbidden Forest, that they started to worry. It happened in a matter or two hours. They had been in Care of Magical Creatures, down by Hagrid's wooden hut. They had been laughing at something Ron said when a green light struck Lavender Brown in the chest. Her beautiful face portrayed confusion and fear, as she silently toppled to the grass.
Everyone had stood frozen, staring into her lifeless eyes with utter fear. It had been he who had acted first. She had always envied his quick mind in the face of danger, fearless face and stunning eyes. He had rounded us up; awaken our thoughts from endless dark. With swift words, he sent Dean Thomas up to the castle to alert the headmaster. Then he had turned to me, eyes shining in a strange green light laced with evident fear. The look only lasted a second but she immediately knew what it meant: be careful.
Then he had turned to the tree line, watching Death Eaters appear from the bushy undergrowth. They had spilled from the forest like a black wave; you couldn't stop fighting for fear of drowning.
Many had died that day, especially when more students came to help the battle, running from the castle, wands ready, faces set. It had been amazing, seeing everyone acting together without a second thought about what house they were in or who their parents were. They only cared about the cause they were fighting for and what their outcome was: freedom.
She had seen him and Ron fighting back to back. It was if they had rehearsed it. They were beautiful. She had tried to keep watching them but there had been so many Death Eaters and so little of them. Death was everywhere, and it took all she had not to flee in horror or break down in tears. She kept fighting for him. Because she knew if they won this war, he would be free from the binds holding him. Free to live.
That thought had kept her fighting, kept her moving despite the darkness moving in. And while she had been firing spell after spell, watching him from the corner of her eye, she knew that they would make it. That the battle would be won by them. She never thought that it would be won at such a high price.
The rain bit into her flesh as if to remind her that she was alone. She looked around her in the diminishing light, to find nothing but the slippery stones of the Astronomy Tower. She remembered a time when he had been there.
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"It looks like it's going to rain." Hermione said with a secret smile, looking to her left to find his eyes on her.
"Yes, it does." He said without looking away. As if acting on her words, the first raindrop splattered to the stone between them. Hermione smiled, looking back up at the cloudy sky. More drops of water fell to her face, running across her warm skin. She loved the rain. And so did he.
"Why do you like the rain?" she asked him, looking down into his glowing emerald eyes. He smiled and looked out across the sloping grounds of Hogwarts.
"I'm not sure. I think because I know that my parents are up there, looking down on me. And when it rains, it's as if they're crying and I finally get to feel and see them. Their tears comfort me." Harry said a distant look in his eyes. Hermione clasped his hand.
"That's why I love it so much. It's a little strange that we both like it for the same reason." she said softly, squeezing the soft flesh of his palms. He squeezed back.
"Yes." He said in a voice determined and passionate. "And my tears will fall one day." Hermione almost jumped in shock.
"What?" she whispered silently, pleadingly...
"When I die, I hope I will go up there to be with my parents. And I will cry, so you can feel my tears and know I'm still with you." Harry said, turning his head to face hers. She found herself speechless as he clasped her hands in his own. "You have to promise me, Hermione. Promise me that when I'm gone, you will keep living and when you see the rain, you will remember me." He said it with such fierce passion and desperation that Hermione let out a whimper.
"Harry -"
"Promise me, Hermione. You have to keep living. Live for me. So the rain won't fall without you to catch it! Promise me!" Harry said desperately, squeezing her hands tightly. Hermione let a tear roll down her cheek, joining with the glittering rain drops.
"I promise."
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So Harry was up there and this rain was his. He was crying for her, crying to let her know he was still there.
She hated him for leaving her.
She had to sit here alone, with nothing but his tears to comfort her. As if they ever would. They just trickled across her skin, reminding her of his tender touch and soft kisses.
She would never feel them again.
The ground was so far beneath her dangling legs. The rain dripped from her bare feet, disappearing in the multitude of water droplets cascading to the soggy, brown earth below. It would be so easy to end the pain right now. So easy to stop the hollow inside her. So easy to forget why she loved the rain so much.
She so much wanted to just push off from the ledge. Then she would finally feel the freedom that Harry only felt in flying. She would finally join him in the sky, where their tears could fall together. She was so tempted to slip from the edge. It would look like an accident. It's not as if anyone would care.
But even as much as she wanted to jump - she couldn't. She had promised him. She had promised him that she would live if anything ever had happened to him. He had made her promise. And she couldn't break a promise made with Harry.
She stared at the hard, unforgiving ground, where puddles had formed from the falling rain. A clap of thunder boomed, as if it was Harry's voice telling her everything would be okay. And a flash of lightning lit the sky, reminding her of the curse that had ruined his life. At least now he was free. Free from everything.
Hermione sighed in pain, swinging her legs up from the edge of the tower. Her clothes were dripping with water, and her skin was turning blue from the cold. She didn't care. Harry was no longer here to keep her warm. She stood sadly, turned her head so her eyes were staring up into the darkening sky. The rain fell down to her face.
"I can feel your tears, Harry." she murmured as she cried. "I know you're up there crying and I know you will never leave me. I just miss you." Hermione closed her eyes and bowed her head, her sagging hair framing her face. With one last desperate look around the stormy sky, she made ready to go inside. Ron would know she had been out here again. And he would ask why she always went in the rain.
He would never know why she loved the rain.
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Disclaimer - I do not own Harry Potter and never will.
Hey, before you all flame me for writing this instead of all my other stories, this has been done for a while. I forgot about it until now so I decided to post it. I promise I'll finish off the rest of the chapters for the other stories tomorrow, before and after work. They just don't seem to not want to be written. Sigh...
I know this is depressing, and I hated writing it. It made me sad. So don't ask why I wrote it, I just did.
Please review and all that! Thanks.
DW
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