Title: Hero's Duty
Pairing: H/Hr
Rating: R (language only)
Notes: The end crept out of nowhere. Sometimes, characters want to have a say … even if they don't say anything. You'll see what I mean.
Hero - Nickelback
I am so high, I can hear heaven,
I am so high, I can hear heaven,
Oh, but heaven, no heaven, don't hear me,
Harry was flying around the Quidditch Pitch on his broom, thinking. He had been doing a lot of that lately. He flew to get as close to heaven as he could. There he could talk to all those people he missed - Sirius for example. His parents were on the list, but he had come to the conclusion that he only missed the idea of parents, since one could not miss something they never really had in the first place.
"Why is it me?" he shouted up toward the inky sky. "Why couldn't it have been someone else?" He clutched his broom's handle and forced it to fly faster and higher. He wanted to pierce the veil of blackness and force his way to wherever those who weren't with him were.
He flew higher and higher until the atmosphere grew thinner and it became difficult for him to breathe. No one answered him. He still didn't know why it had to be him.
And they say that a hero can save us,
I'm not gonna stand here and wait,
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles,
Watch as they all fly away,
The Prophecy said it had to be him. He would be the one to save them all. He decided he would die in the process. His life had never been happy, not really. Every miniscule moment of happiness was overshadowed or blackened out by sadness or guilt. To him the guilt was worse than the sadness.
Harry leveled off his broom and started flying in the patterns he designed for Quidditch Practice.
"No. I am not going to wait for him to come and find me. No. He isn't going to take away everything that is important to me. I am going to go after him. I am going to win. He is going to die and I am going to take my life back. You hear that? I am going after him and I am going to be ready!" he yelled into the unresponsive blackness. "I am not going to wait for them to tell me I am a hero. I'll make myself one!"
Someone told me, love would all save us,
But how can that be, look what love gave us,
A world full of killing, and blood-spilling,
That world never came,
Harry had run directly to Dumbledore's office. He was now seated in a chair across from Dumbledore in front of the fire with a teacup perched on his knee.
"Harry, when the time comes…"
"The time has come. You told me that my mother's love has kept me alive this long, but what good is my life when all these other people are dying?"
"Harry, you don't understand …"
"Then explain it to me. Tell me. You hide things from me all the time. You could save me from so much pain and all this shit if you would just fucking tell me what is going on!" He yelled.
"Harry, I understand that you are upset, really, I do…"
"How can you possibly when you are omniscient and know all? No one can keep anything from you," he said flatly. "You said that my mother's love could save me. So, then, by extension, it will save everyone. I'm doing this, unless you can give me a good reason not to."
"Hermione and Ron," he said, looking the young wizard in the eye.
"They are reason enough to do this," he said getting up and setting the teacup on a table. "You can help me or you can let me die. But I am doing this," he asserted as he walked toward the exit.
"Harry your mother gave her life to save you …"
"And look what it did? I should have died that night! She should be alive and I should be dead. All that saving me did was perpetuate this goddamned war!"
And they say that a hero can save us,
I'm not gonna stand here and wait,
I'll hold on to the wings of the eagles,
Watch as they all fly away,
Harry made his way back to Gryffindor tower. Hermione was sitting at her table with her books surrounding her, and her back facing Harry. Her parchment was flying across the page, her cramped handwriting recording every detail printed in her books.
"Why not just use a duplicating charm? It would keep your hand from cramping up," he said as he walked toward her.
Hermione jumped. "Harry, you startled me."
"You should know better than to keep your back to the portrait hole. You were waiting for me, so why were you pretending not to?"
Hermione didn't answer.
"I have to tell you something," he said as he let his hand rest on her shoulder. "I've was flying and …" Harry told her about his thoughts, the Prophecy and his conversation with Dumbledore.
Hermione's eyes grew shiny with tears.
"Hermione, I'm doing this for you," he said as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. He inhaled the scent of her hair.
"Let me help you," she said, leaning her head into his chest.
Harry didn't say a word. He just held her close to him. After a moment. "No. I can't risk losing you, too. I just can't sacrifice any more people I love. I need to know you're safe in order for me to do what I need to do."
"I am not going to sit here and wait for you. That isn't going to happen. I am helping you and that is the end of the discussion."
Now that the world isn't ending,
It's love that I'm sending to you,
It isn't the love of a hero,
And that's why I fear it won't do,
Months later, Harry stood in front of a pile of ash that had once been Voldemort. He had done what he had set out to do. But he hadn't done it alone.
Ron and Hermione had helped, and neither one of them had died. Harry turned his eyes toward heaven and thanked whatever beings had protected them.
Harry turned to Hermione.
Hermione ran to him and wrapped her arms around him, her tears were wetting his face. "Oh, my gods, I am so … Harry, I love you, I was so worried … I …"
"Hermione, stop," he said pushing her back a bit. "I love you too," he paused, "but, it isn't the love that you think."
Hermione looked at him confused. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm not a hero, I'm just … Harry," he explained.
"Don't be so bloody daft. I don't love you because you are Harry Potter, I love you because you're Harry."
"But you gave so much. Because you loved me you saved me. I don't have that kind of love to give," he said in a worried tone.
"Nonsense … you love me and that is enough," she began.
"I'm not good enough for you. I can never love you as much or as deeply as I hated him … I've used all of my emotion up on that … that …" he said indicating Voldemort's remains.
"Stop. I don't need a hero. I need you," she said pulling him into a kiss. "I want you just as you are."
And they say that a hero can save us,
I'm not gonna stand here and wait,
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles,
Watch as they all fly away.
Harry kissed her back, and silently admitted she was right. He only stopped kissing her when Ron cleared his throat.
Harry and Hermione both blushed red. "Sorry about that, Ron," said Harry.
"No, really, it's about bloody time! But," he said indicating the throngs of people advancing with is head, "you might want to get out of here."
"Yeah, I'm not going to stand here and wait for someone to save me from those people, they look mad with happiness," he commented.
"Come on, Hermione, my broom is still here, we can make a quick get away," he said.
"But we can apparate," she protested.
"Where is the romance in that?" he joked.
Hermione relented and followed Harry.
And they are watching us,
They're watching us,
As we all fly away,
Harry and Hermione could hear the disappointment in the voices of those below hoping to catch a glimpse of their hero. Hermione tightened her grip on Harry as he took the broom higher and higher to drown out the noise of those below.
And they are watching us,
They're watching us,
As we all fly away,
"Isn't it beautiful up here?" he asked her.
"It is even more beautiful from the ground," she commented.
There was a reflective silence for a moment as the both realized the impact of the events that had just passed.
"Do you think they can hear me, Hermione?" asked Harry as his gaze fixed again on the impenetrable darkness.
"Of course they can, Harry," she replied without hesitation.
"Do you think they're proud of me?"
"Yes. And so am I, Harry. You've just …"
"Made everything worth it. I made my Mum's death mean something, I didn't waste what she did."
Hermione just held him tighter.
"Thanks, Mum, Dad, Sirius, for everything," he said.
And they are watching us,
They're watching us,
As we all fly away.
From their place beyond the veil, hidden behind the darkness, Lily, James, and Sirius told Harry that his thanks was not necessary. That he was the one who did what he had to do. They watched him begin a new chapter of his life and put an end to the sadness and the guilt. Maybe one day he would hear them, and he would know … everything.
~Fin~
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