Author's note: Yes, I know I have one (or three) stories that need to be completed, but this plot bunny would not be denied which was partially inspired by Goldy's excellent Neville/Hr (*cough*) fic. This easily could have stretched out longer, but I'm sure you all would rather I get back to fic(s) that are in progress.
This also my first 3rd person story in over a year, so I'm a bit rusty.
Not Clever Enough
Hermione spent the summer after fifth year filled with worry. Because Harry had stayed with the Dursleys all summer (Hermione was still unclear on whether that was Dumbledore's choice or Harry's), she had formulated many expectations, and fears, on how Harry would react once they were all together back at Hogwarts. She knew that the events of not only last year, but the previous five years combined, had to affect him somehow. Last year, Harry was often quick-tempered and ill-mannered. But with the death of Sirius, and no doubt Harry blaming himself in some way, Hermione was afraid that her best friend would fall into a depression, or worse, try and push her and Ron away in some misguided attempt to protect them. And so, practically all summer at Grimmauld Place, she and Ron discussed "how to deal with Harry."
Ron was hesitant at first. "Erm, what makes you think he'll want to talk about it?" he asked uncomfortably when Hermione brought it up.
Hermione rolled her eyes. "He won't want to talk about it Ron, but he has to."
"Why does he have to? He never talked about how he felt about Cedric."
Hermione opened her mouth to respond, but then she saw that Ron genuinely had no idea and was not just afraid of talking to Harry. "Never mind," she finally said. "Just trust me."
"But-"
"If you want my help at all with homework or tests, you'll do as I say," Hermione said rather curtly.
"All right, fine," Ron said grumpily. "But I better get some O's this year!"
And so, together they envisioned innumerable scenarios on how Harry might behave, and how they would react to him. They established roles: Hermione would handle the soul-searching talking part, and Ron would provide the brotherly support and cheer. And above it all, they would be patient and understanding. As they waited for Harry at King's Cross, they were prepared for anything.
Or so they thought.
"Hi Ron, hi Hermione," Harry said cheerfully as he greeted them at the station. He seemed amiable, well-fed, and perfectly stable. In other words, it was all wrong. Where were the angry outbursts? Where were the awkward silences whenever something reminded him of Sirius or Voldemort? Instead, he seemed more than willing to talk about the Order and Voldemort, and, of course, he could be excused if he was reluctant to talk about Sirius. Though Hermione was surprised, she was very relieved that her fears that Harry would try to distance himself from them were unfounded.
Harry surprised them again after the students had retired to their Houses that first night. When Ron and Hermione finally returned to the Common Room after completing their prefect duties, Harry was nowhere to be found; no one knew where he was. But before Hermione could truly work herself up, Harry clambered through the portrait hole and announced in a clear, determined voice that he was going to organize the D.A. again, and all were invited to join. Not only that, but afterwards Harry told them why he had been missing: with Dumbledore's permission, Harry had visited each of the other Houses (except, to Hermione's displeasure, Slytherin) to make a similar announcement about the D.A. Harry's sudden resolve impressed Hermione.
And so, over the next several months, the D.A. flourished. While membership included the majority of students fifth-year and above, there soon developed a core group of students that Hermione knew would staunchly stand by Harry in the fight against Voldemort. For once, it didn't seem like just her, Harry, and Ron against the world, and she was glad.
But Harry didn't stop at simply holding meetings in the Room of Requirements. "Team-building" sessions, as he called them, were held all over the school grounds and even in Hogsmeade. Harry said, and Hermione whole-heartedly agreed, that the D.A. should be like a family, not just a loose collection of students. As a result, through these sessions, Hermione did something she'd never thought she ever would - become close friends with Lavender and Pavarti. True, they were still a bit too giggly and gossipy for Hermione's tastes, but she found that they had more in common then she had thought; either the two girls had matured over the years, or being with Ron and Harry too much had caused Hermione to regress.
And Hermione found that she also had a lot in common with the Ravenclaws, and Hufflepuffs were always a likeable lot. Though Hermione was still best friends with Harry and Ron, she unexpectedly found herself with more friends then she could ever remember having.
**********
Hermione sat on the grass near the lake, talking animatedly with Mandy, Padma, and Susan about an upcoming Arithmancy test. They had just finished an outdoor session of the D.A., and many people stuck around afterward to lie about, relaxing and talking.
Allowing herself a moment of peace, Hermione looked contentedly around at the assembled group. Ginny and Neville sat together, looking rather chummy; she'd have to file that one away for later. Dean and Anthony were kicking a soccer ball around as Dennis and Colin attempted in vain to intercept a pass. She hid a smile as she watched Terry pretend to look interested in a conversation with Lavendar and Pavarti - no doubt the two girls were talking about the latest in robes or footwear. And finally, Harry, Ron, Seamus and Justin seemed to be talking about Quidditch (to guess from the vigorous hand movements) while Luna and Hannah made no attempt to hide their disinterest in the conversation.
Hermione was about to rejoin the Arithmancy discussion when something odd caught her attention. She looked closer at Harry, but she couldn't figure out what it was that was bothering her. He was sitting there next to Justin, nodding and laughing, but he wasn't really talking. In fact, he seemed to sitting a little outside of the group, as if only watching and not really participating. But before she could dwell on it further, Padma asked for her opinion in Ancient Runes, which started a whole new conversation.
A few minutes later, Hermione looked up again, only to find that Harry was gone. Curious, she excused herself from the group and approached Ron.
"Where'd Harry go?" she asked.
Ron looked around, as if suddenly realizing that Harry was gone, and then shrugged. "I think he said he had something to take care of," Hannah said. Hermione nodded, satisfied, and headed back to her group.
And then it hit her - somehow, without her even realizing it, Harry had accomplished what Hermione had spent the whole summer preparing to prevent. He had pushed them away.
But it wasn't at all like she'd imagined. She thought that he'd rant and rage at them, say horrible things or not say anything at all, until he had pushed them away and was alone. But he had done the opposite: instead of distancing himself from them, he somehow had himself replaced with the entire D.A.
The more she thought about it, the more things seemed to fall into place. They rarely ever spent time together, just the three of them, but he always seemed to be a valid reason: Ron and Hermione had prefect duties, or Harry had private lessons with Dumbledore (where he learned the spells that he would teach the D.A.), or Harry's favorite: "promoting House unity." It was the reason he gave for insisting that they start taking meals at different tables and for partnering with different people during classes. And since Hermione had always championed House unity, she had been pleased, rather then suspicious.
But now she saw it: Harry had insisted and encouraged both her and Ron to spend time with others because it served his hidden purpose of separating himself from their lives. It was positively diabolical; Hermione was impressed despite herself.
It was a good try, but Harry's plan just wasn't clever enough, and it would all have to stop.
**********
Having been told by a third-year that Harry was last seen heading upstairs, Hermione knocked on the sixth-year boys' dorm.
"Come in," she heard him call out.
Hermione opened the door and walked in. Harry was sitting on his bed and was evidently in the middle of leafing through a Quidditch magazine. He looked at Hermione in surprise.
"Hermione? What are you…is everything okay?"
"Everything's fine," she said, pulling his chair closer to his bed. "How are you?"
Harry looked confused. "Erm, fine? Why?"
Hermione sat down, crossed legs, and began to examine her fingernails. "No reason…I just thought it curious that you left to go read in your room."
"Why, did something happen?"
Hermione shook her head. "Nothing happened; I was just curious."
"Well…the class was over, and…"
"And you thought it'd be more fun to read a magazine that you're read a dozen times instead of hanging out with the D.A.?"
"Of course not. I left because, uh…I thought I had a training session, but it turns out that it's for tomorrow instead."
"So instead of going back out to the lake, you went to your room?"
"Well…yeah, I thought I had to do some homework, but-"
"I must admit, you've gotten much better at it," Hermione interrupted, still examining her nails.
"Better at what?" Harry asked, utterly confused by the entire conversation.
"Lying," Hermione said, finally looking at Harry.
Harry gave off a nervous laugh. "Lying? Hermione, what are you t-"
"I know what you're doing, Harry. Or at least, what you've been trying to do."
"And what exactly am I trying to do?"
"Push us away," Hermione said simply.
Harry looked shocked and insulted. "What!? Push you away? How have I done that? I've probably spent more time around people this year then ever before!"
Hermione was so impressed by his acting performance that she felt like clapping. "It was truly an ingenious plan, Harry. `All in the name of House unity,' you said. `We all have to work together to defeat Voldemort,' you said. But it was all lies, wasn't it?" she asked, her voice steadily rising.
When Harry didn't answer, Hermione felt herself become extremely angry. "I thought you had gotten it through your thick skull!" she exploded. "It was not your fault!"
"I know…" Harry said in a quiet voice.
"You know? Then stop trying to protect us!" When Harry looked away, Hermione continued. "We're already in danger, all of us. I know that being close to you puts us at greater risk, but it's our choice to-"
"Actually, you're wrong," Harry interrupted.
"Sorry, Harry, but despite your tendency to put everything on your shoulders, it is our choice whether or not we want to-"
"No, that' not what I meant," Harry said. "What I meant is that you're not at any more risk for knowing me."
Having not expected to hear that from Harry, Hermione was nonplussed. "What?"
"Voldemort's never really been after me, you know? At least, not to kill me. I just happen to be in the way of what he really wanted. The Sorceror's Stone, blood, the prophecy - I've simply been a means to an end."
"But…"
"I'm not saying that he wouldn't kill me if he had the chance," Harry said quickly. "But it's more of a revenge thing - because I embarrassed him years ago - then me being his target. He has much more pressing things and threats to deal with than me, and I truly doubt he considers me much of a threat."
"Oh," was all Hermione could say. She slowly sat down as she tried to process what Harry said. After a moment, she asked, "Then why are you pushing us away?"
"Like I was saying, I'm not trying to push you-"
But Hermione wasn't listening, already working through the puzzle. "If you're not afraid that Voldemort will come after us to get to you, then why would you go through so much trouble…"
"Hermione," Harry said gently, "I wasn't trying to-"
"…If you're not protecting us from Voldemort, then what are you protecting us from? Unless…" Harry could practically see the realization dawn in Hermione's eyes. Suddenly, she grabbed Harry's arm. "No, Harry, you can't think like that," she pleaded.
"Hermione-"
"You said it yourself, he's not after you. Dumbledore and the Order will stop him. You are not going to die," she said, almost desperately.
Harry turned away, silent as Hermione clung to his arm. Finally, he looked at her and signed heavily. "Have you ever lost anyone close to you?"
Hermione shook her head.
"It's…it's not a good feeling," Harry said with some difficulty.
"I-"
Harry stood up, jerking his arm out of Hermione's grasp and walked to the window. "It tears away at you, like a piece of you has been ripped out. All I wanted to do the first week at the Dursleys' was to stay in bed all day. And when I finally felt like getting up and about, I felt guilty any time I felt anything other then sadness. Why should I be happy when Sirius is dead? And this was only Sirius. I barely knew him, and look how his death has affected me! If it were someone that I was close with, someone that I'd known for years…no one should have to go through that, and if I can prevent anyone else from feeling like that, I will."
Hermione stood and walked to Harry. "Harry, you can't…you can't stop living your life just because there's a small chance that-"
"It's not just a small chance, Hermione."
"Of course it is. You just said that Voldemort's not after you."
"He's not."
"Then why…" Harry turned around. He opened his mouth, but closed it. "What is it, Harry?"
"Nothing, it's nothing Hermione."
An exasperated look came across her face. "You can either tell me now, Harry Potter, or later. But you know I'll get the information out of you eventually."
Harry looked at her for a long moment. He knew that he shouldn't, but at the same time, Harry carried a terrible burden by keeping everything inside. Harry took a deep breath, and then proceeded to tell Hermione about the prophecy. At first, the words came out flat and mechanically, but as he continued, his voice took on a sense of urgency. By the time he finished, it was now Harry who spoke with desperation.
He grabbed Hermione by the arms, his fingers digging painfully into her flesh. "You see now, don't you? You see why I have to do this?" he asked, tears developing in his eyes. "I have to face Voldemort in the end, and one of us will die, and…and…I'm not even seventeen yet! How am I supposed to…I won't let you go through what I went through, do you understand? I just won't-"
Hermione somehow extracted herself from Harry's grip and pulled him into a tight hug. He struggled to free himself so he could reason with her, make her see that this was the only way, but she wouldn't let go no matter what he did. Eventually he stopped, surrendering to her and crying quietly into her hair.
Untold minutes past until Hermione loosened her arms slightly, allowing her to look at Harry in the face. Tears were evident on her face, but her voice was strong and clear.
"You listen to me, Harry," she said in a firm, unwavering voice. "There is absolutely no chance that you will be able to push me a way. There's nothing - nothing - that you can do that will prevent me from being by your side."
"But-"
"No chance at all. Understand?"
"But-"
"Just nod, Harry."
Harry nodded.
"So, that just leaves us with one other option, doesn't it?"
"What's that?" asked Harry.
"You'll just have to defeat him."
Harry looked dumbfounded. "It's not that simple Hermione. This is Voldemort we're talking about, not some Charms test! He's been doing Dark Magic longer than I've been alive! How can I fight that? What chance do I have?"
Hermione cupped her hands around Harry's face, making sure that she had his full and undivided attention. "When have we ever failed to accomplish something when we work together? When has anyone been able to stop us? You're not in this alone, Harry. Whatever happens, I will be here to help you, to go through it with you. You are not alone."
"I don't know…" Harry said softly.
"Well I do. You can trust me. And you know I'm never wrong."
Harry chuckled. "No, I guess not."
Hermione smiled. "Good boy. Now, why don't you tell me that prophecy again? I'd love to study it. There might some books in the library that could help."
Harry couldn't help the smile that came across his face. He still wasn't fully convinced that he could defeat the most powerful Dark wizard in ages, but he felt that, with Hermione, he could sure give him a run for his money.
-->