A/N: So, this piece is a little more interesting than it would seem. It reveals a big part of my writing process: I write dialogue and any major physical movement before I write reactions and little things, like emotion. So this whole fic rolled out in one big spurt of dialogue, since there is no major physical movement or anything. I got to the end and began to re-read to add the other stuff when I realized it was way cooler like this. So there you go. It's also really, really, really old. Enjoy!
Movie Night
"Crossing Delancey"
"No"
"Sleepless in Seattle"
"Nope"
"A Room with a View"
"No, thank you."
"When Harry met Sally."
"Nah"
"Hermione, are you feeling well? You adore these predictable American romantic comedies. I can't count the number of times you've charmed me to the couch and made me watch them over and over and over again. But I can tell you that it's been enough times that when the other day someone at the deli mentioned their cat meowing funny, I began thinking of one of those one inane scenes."
"Oh, Harry. I'm not ill. I'm just feeling a bit disillusioned with the true love thing. After breaking things off with Seamus, I don't know... I guess I'm contemplating whether I want to bother with the whole 'everlasting love' thing."
"You're swearing off love?"
"Well, when put that way it does sound a bit melodramatic, doesn't it? But you could say that... I'm lowering my expectations."
"Hear ye, hear ye, all the masses. Hermione Granger has lowered her expectations. All gomers and shmucks should feel free to approach now."
"Oh Harry, don't put it like that. I just don't need to be in love to be happy in a relationship anymore."
"You've just decided it and decreed it, and so it shall be so?"
"Well, yes."
"God you're healthy."
"Oh, don't tempt me with snippets of dialogue. I'm dedicated."
"You always are."
"I'm resolute."
"I wouldn't expect anything less from you."
"In fact, I would be a bit turned off if someone thought they were in love with me."
"Really, Hermione?"
"Yes. That's it."
"That's what?"
"That's my new plan."
"What is?"
"That I will never be with someone who is silly enough to think themselves in love with me."
"Silly? Thinks themselves? It's so impossible someone could love you?"
"Well, that is my conclusion. Everyone I've ever dated, even those who said they loved me have in the end found me too shrewish to be borne."
"You're exaggerating. I don't think you're shrewish."
"But we've never dated have we? I'm not saying I can't have friends- it's just that men can't stand to be in a relationship with me, so why bother?"
"I think those men who think you're shrewish are just obviously unsuited for you. When you find the right one, they won't and you'll know."
"Harry, that isn't the point."
"And the point would be?"
"That, even if someone did love me, obviously I wouldn't believe them, so it wouldn't work anyway since I no longer trusted them. So I could never be with someone who thought they loved me."
"Never Hermione? You will never be with someone who loves you? Life without love. You set yourself up to be miserable."
"I do not. It's only practical, isn't it? If I can't love them- which I couldn't because I don't trust them, because I am convinced that they couldn't actually love me- why should I string them along?"
"You think yourself incapable of love?"
"Well, yes, didn't we just discuss this?"
"You said the grand passionate affair would always allude you. You did not inform me you didn't love me anymore."
"Oh, Harry, you know what I mean."
"This may surprise you, what with how rarely you're wrong, but I do not."
"I mean, I just can't see myself with that kind of love."
"Oh... so at the ripe old age of 20, you are quite sure you will never feel that kind of love."
"Yes. Absolutely sure."
"Words, nor actions, nor true emotion can sway you."
"Exactly."
"I mean, but what if some one did love you. Was devoted to you. Worshiped the ground you walked on; called you gorgeous daily, brilliant hourly; had you on his mind all the time; thought you were charming, intelligent, kind and compassionate. Then would you change your mind?"
"Well..."
"Yes?"
"I guess..."
"Yes?"
"Then, and only then, I might reconsider."
"Good. I would be very sad to see you deny someone who loved you like that."
"So, maybe not forever. Maybe I am capable of that kind of love. But in the short term, what I said still stands. Love, for the time being, is a bother."
"And you, ever practical, could not trifle with such trivial bothers such as it."
"Well, maybe I could."
"And Hermione Granger wavers in her convictions"
"But we're speaking in hypotheticals. At the moment there isn't someone like that for me, is there?"
"You're so very sure?"
"Oh yes, so very, very sure."
"So you think no one loves you like that."
"I don't see why I'd think otherwise."
"Well, alright then."
"And don't you sound so pitying of me Harry Potter. Because it's okay. I'm independent. I'm brilliant. I'm self sufficient. I don't need a man or love to make me feel fulfilled. I'm liberated. I'm - why are you looking at me like that?"
"Like what?"
"All quizzical and surprised, and pondering."
"Oh well, I'm just trying to figure something out."
"What?"
"Why everyone thinks you're so clever."
"What are you on ab-"
She was interrupted by his kiss.