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PlayWitch Of The Month by dumbles
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PlayWitch Of The Month

dumbles

Title: PlayWitch Of The Month

Rating: R for Adult Themes

Summary: Harry Potter thought he knew Hermione Granger well. Until she does something very risqué that will change the way he sees her… forever. One-shot.

Authors Notes: I've had this in my head for ages now and I've only just finally got the chance to write it. I wrote it very quickly, so I apologise if it seems rushed or ill explained. It's just that when I get the urge to write, I write and then I post it before I have a chance to doubt myself.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Harry Potter liked to say that he knew his two best friends as well as you could know any person. He and Ron had been sharing a flat together for the past two years, since they graduated from Hogwarts and the war ended. They both worked for the Department of Magical Games and Sports, Quidditch Division. His other best friend, Hermione Granger, worked for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement and was tipped to take over the leadership of the department any day now. Some whispers inside the ministry tipped her for the Minister's job within three years.

The day our story starts, a very typical Wednesday morning, found Harry leaving his flat early and walking the very short distance to the Leaky Cauldron and Diagon Alley. The newest issue of Quidditch Monthly was out that day and he wanted to buy it before he went to work- he had given a lengthy interview on the future of Quidditch in England and he wanted to see how it had turned out.

He greeted people as he walked up the cobblestone street. Gringott's Bank was shining in the sun and Harry walked straight past it, into the small newsagents. He smiled at the people as he walked past and headed up the back to where the sports magazines were kept.

He didn't know what made him pause at the less tasteful magazines, but he did. He had never in his whole life been tempted to buy a PlayWizard magazine. But for some strange reason, he stopped in front of them.

His jaw hit the floor as he realized what had caught his eye. Sprawled on a lounge, holding a book to cover the until then private parts of her body, was Hermione Granger.

HERMIONE GRANGER SPEAKS HER MIND read the text across the bottom. We quiz Hermione Granger on her work, life and of course, Harry Potter. PLUS exclusive, never before seen pictures of one of the most famous witches in the world.

Quidditch Monthly was pushed out of his mind. He grabbed the magazine and, forgetting they were magically sealed to prevent underage wizards reading them, tried to find the article. But it wouldn't open. Flustered, he walked up to the counter and slapped two galleons on the counter. The wizard behind just smirked at him, but Harry said nothing.

He slipped the magazine into his workbag and apparated directly to the ministry lobby. His mind was whirling at a million miles an hour- Hermione posing for and giving interviews to PlayWizard? It didn't make sense.

And he couldn't even go up to her office and talk to her- she had taken a holiday on the spur of the moment and was in Italy at that very minute.

He took the golden lift up to his floor and stalked up the hallway to the office that he and Ron shared. Ron was at his desk, looking thoroughly sleepy still and nursing a large mug of what Harry knew to be black coffee as strong as he could make it.

'You were up early,' Ron said, stifling a yawn.

'Wanted to get Quidditch Monthly,' Harry explained.

'Yeah, and?'

'I ended up with this,' he said, opening his workbag and flinging the magazine across the desk. Ron picked it up and his eyes grew wide.

'Is that…'

'Yes,' was all Harry could say. Ron's eyes were bulging.

'Did she… did she pose… you know, naked?'

'I haven't looked,' Harry said truthfully. Ron opened the magazine, but Harry whipped out his wand and summoned it back. 'Ron!'

'What?'

'She's our best friend! We can't, you know, perve on her!' Harry exclaimed.

'I wasn't going to perve!' Ron said back, his ears glowing red. 'I was, er, going to read the interview.'

Harry scoffed and shut the door and sat down at his own desk which was directly opposite Ron's.

'Why didn't she tell us?' he mused. Ron shrugged, shooting the magazine covetous looks.

There was a knock on the door and they both jumped. Harry waved his wand again and the door opened, revealing Ron's sister, Ginny.

'Do you guys have a copy of the…' she trailed off, looking at the magazine that Harry was still holding. It had been blocked by things on Harry's desk, so that only the title was visible. 'Erm, if you guys want to be alone…'

'What?' Ron said, confused, before catching sight of the magazine in Harry's hand. 'Oh, no! It's… did you know… well, Hermione, she…'

'Oh, it's Hermione's issue is it?' Ginny asked, before going red. Harry's head spun so fast it almost spun off.

'You knew about this?' He asked and Ginny nodded.

'Well, yeah,' she said nonchalantly. 'She asked me to go along to the photo shoot with her. She was, you know, nervous.'

'But… why?' Harry managed to ask. Ginny smirked slightly and then shrugged her shoulders.

'Oh, I dunno…' she said vaguely, sounding more like Luna Lovegood than her usual self. 'She had her reasons…'

~*~

At that moment, Hermione was waking up in her small rented villa on the coast of Italy. The calendar next to the bed told her what day it was and she gulped.

The magazine would be coming out today.

It was her interview that had made her want to come on holiday's so suddenly. She knew that once Harry and Ron had wind of it, they would be beating down her door, furious with her. So she had left the country in advance.

Of course, it was because of them, well him, that she had done it. For too long she had sat on the sidelines, dropping subtle hints and skirting around the issue of crushes between the three of them. She knew that Ron had always had a crush on her, but since he had gotten on the dating scene, it was a thing of the past. He now had a new girlfriend every week and loved it.

Harry was harder to read, of course. His only two girlfriends had been Cho and Ginny. Cho and he hadn't spoken in years and he and Ginny were only friends.

But Harry was oblivious. Oblivious to everything. Including the fact that Hermione had been trying for three years now to get his attention.

So it was because of Harry that she had consented to the interview and photo shoot. In the hope that it might, maybe, knock some sense into him.

~*~

It was morning tea before Harry could no longer resist. Ron was busy writing a memo and he hid the magazine in his robes and stood up.

'Just going to the loo and getting a coffee,' he said, backing towards the door. Ron just grunted.

Harry almost bolted to the loo's at the end of their corridor, sealing himself into one of the cubicles. He locked the door to the cubicle and then, for good measures, used his wand to lock the whole area off to other wizards.

He pulled the magazine out and looked at the picture on the front. Hermione looked very pretty- no, beautiful. Her hair was in loose curls, falling around her face. The book she was holding across her body stopped halfway up her breasts and it looked like they might just pop out from the front at any moment.

Hands shaking, Harry opened the magazine and flipped through to her interview. He had to draw his eyes away from the picture that accompanied the first page- the book had slipped down and her breasts were on full display. Creamy, white flesh with small red dots for nipples… his heart beat quickened.

'Stop it,' he told himself, tearing his eyes away and starting to read the article.

HERMIONE GRANGER has just celebrated her twentieth birthday and how did she do it? A small dinner in her flat with just her two closest friends.

'I'm not much of a party person,' she tells PlayWizard coyly. 'I'm just a nice, quiet girl.'

My first impression of Hermione Granger as she came into the PlayWizard studio was that she was a very, shy person. Of course, once introductions had been made, she was a lot more open and honest.

'I never, ever saw myself doing something like this,' she said as our photographer arranged hundred of different poses. 'I suppose I'd just never really thought about it.'

Once the photos had been taken, it was time to get down to business with our interview…

PlayWizard: Rumours have been circulating for months that you are going to put your hand into the ring for the next Minster of Magic elections. Any word on that?

Hermione Granger: I find it flattering that people think of me as a person who could do the Ministers job at such a young age- but I'm not putting my hand up this time. Maybe not even next time, either. I'm still far too young. I want to focus on my work in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, before I think about the Minister's office.

PW: Rest assured, you'll have our vote. You, of course, made history with your NEWT results, becoming the first witch or wizard to ever obtain twelve NEWT's. How did that feel?

HG: Incredible. I worked so hard throughout my seventh year at Hogwarts. And considering that we were fighting in the war at the same time makes it even more of an achievement for me. Of course, I wouldn't have done it without my friends. My friends helped me in so many ways that they don't know about.

PW: Speaking of your friends… Harry Potter.

HG: I knew this would be coming…

PW: It's what every one talks about- Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. Is there any romantic relationship going on there?

HG: Huh. No. Harry and I are… we're very close. We've always had a friendship on a different level to everyone else. He understands me and I understand him. I love him.

Harry stopped reading and started at the last three words he had read.

I love him.

His eyes turned back to the picture and before he knew what he was doing, he turned the page, where there was a collage of photos of Hermione in varying stages of undress. His heart was almost thumping out of his chest and there was a very tight feeling in his pants.

He slammed the covers shut on the magazine and threw it on the floor, disgusted with himself. He was getting horny over pictures of Hermione. His best friend!

I love him.

Did she really mean that? Did she mean she was in love with him, or was it love as a friend?

Harry couldn't think, he was hot and flustered and confused. He unlocked the toilets and ran up the corridor, up to the Deparment of Magical Creatures, where Ginny worked. He burst into her office and she looked starteled.

'Ginny…' he said breathlessly. 'Where is Hermione?'

Ginny took a sheet of parchment and scribbled down and address.

'Good luck,' she said, looking him up and down, noticing most the rather large bulge in his pants. Harry didn't see the look or even hear her. Knowing he was about to break over a hundred laws, he pulled out his wand and disapparated directly from Ginny's office.

~*~

Hermione was sitting on the balcony of the villa when she heard a loud crack and looked down and gasped in shock. Harry was standing on the road outside, looking very disheveled. He had obviously just apparated from England- a very stupid thing to do.

Leaving her coffee on the table, she ran through the bedroom and down the stairs and flung the door open.

'Harry?' she said and he turned and looked at her.

'Hermione,' he said throatily, walking towards her.

'What are you doing…'

She didn't even get the sentence out. Before she knew what was happening, Harry had reached her and grabbed her face and kissed her long and hard. Hermione switched onto autopilot. They backed through the door, their lips not separating and he kicked the door shut behind him as they made their way into the lounge room, where she fell backward onto the lounge taking Harry with her.

This caused Harry to break away and she just looked at him, her eyes wide in shock.

'I'm sorry,' he said, moving off her. 'I shouldn't have done that.'

'I'm not sorry,' she said softly and he didn't hear her.

'It's just…' he stood up and began pacing. 'I saw… the pictures… and…'

She sat up and just looked at him, trying not to smile. The pictures had worked.

'Did you mean it?' he asked abruptly.

'Mean what?'

'MeanitwhenyousaidIlovehimaboutme,' he said quickly. Hermione took a few seconds to let her brain figure out what he had said, before nodding slowly.

'I've loved you for a while now,' she said, her voice breaking up. 'You're just so damn clueless.'

'Not now,' he growled, stepping forward and kissing her again. 'Cause dammit, I love you too.'

Hermione had never been happier as her and Harry lay on the lounge, devouring each other all over. Before long her clothes had vanished, along with his and she looked up into his bright green eyes and grinned cheekily.

'Well, at least you can tell the grandkids you once slept with the PlayWitch of the month.'