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1. If you're losing sleep, forgive me




Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything that is related in any way, shape, or form to that universe.

Author's Note: This is from the universe of Paradise. That story went missing and I don't know if it will be reposted (I only put up three chapters so far). I thought since the book of doom is coming out, I wouldn't bother working on my own version. I now imagine after reading said book I will want a better version. I'll probably read many wonderful ones on here. For now though, this is from my own version of book 7. It falls somewhere in all the searching and destroying of horcruxes. No one is dead. Harry and Hermione are still……well read it!

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Laying there facing the window and looking out into the night made her feel as though she was the smallest piece of matter. The knock she had been both dreading and waiting for had finally come after midnight. The traffic had long stopped rushing by and her only disturbance now was the lone street lamp shinning in through the window.

The knock came again, but it didn't startle her into moving. She couldn't look at him now, not after what was probably some of the worse news she'd ever received.

Just that evening, Lupin had arrived at Number 12 to explain that she would be leaving. Harry had stepped up beside her and sought for her hand but she had folded her arms, getting ready for a fight. Lupin had immediately gone on to say that while her family was safe for the moment, she was not. They gotten word that Hermione was being searched for and to keep her and everyone else safe, she would be leaving in the morning and taken to meet her parent at an undisclosed location.

“You'll be back in no time,” Ron had stated.

It all sounded so harmless until she saw Lupin's face. He wouldn't make eye contact with her or Harry. It was then she knew her deepest fear was confirmed. She was being sent away to live as a muggle again with no contact. She knew the dangers.

It was absurd how they thought that would work. Her parents had not even tried to contact since she left, not that she had either. They thought the Death Eaters couldn't find her if she tried to forget her life? She was suppose to go on and forget everything happening with no word? This wasn't logical at all!

The knock got louder this time, the final being a pound by a fist. Hermione sighed and rolled over to face the window.

“Open the door Hermione,” Harry's voice sounded forced, but she could bear it if he came in. She was hanging on by a thread as it was.

******

Harry dropped his forehead against the door, his hand on the handle. He knew he could Alohomora the door open, but he was trying to let her open it on her own choice. Her choice, it seemed, was to ignore him until it was time for her to leave. Harry could let her do that.

Getting desperate, he tried the handle one more time. He needed to get in there. He needed to tell her. She didn't have to talk; he could just stare at her. Didn't she understand that this could possibly be the last few hours they have together and he didn't want to spend it with the door.

Taking a deep breath, he mumbled the charm. The room was dark except for the light spilling in from the window. Harry could see her outline on the bed. Her back was towards him and she was still. Walking further into the room, he tried to tell if she was sleeping. Her breathing was quiet but not steady.

He took a seat on the edge of the bed and made himself calm down. Leaning back against the headboard, Harry gazed down at her still form and tried to think of what to say. He could see the worry etched across her face, she seemed almost defeated. He had never seen her with that look before and he was positive that he didn't want to see it on her again.

“Who's going to look after you?” Her whisper broke through the silence.

Harry began fidgeting with a piece of her hair while coming up with an answer. “I'd say Ron, but even I don't believe that one.” Letting out a long breath he went on, “I don't know. I'd like to think I can take care of myself, but I know better.”

“Oh, Harry. I know you can, but I've gotten so use to it. It's my job, but what if something happens? What if you get something or hear something and you need that extra push to figure it out? I have no doubt that that you can do this alone; I just don't want you to have to.” Hermione had rolled over to look up at him.

Harry continued to focus on the piece of hair he was content to explore. Looking at her face would be too much. How was he suppose to tell her what scared him the most was the thought of her forgetting him while she was gone. What if they never saw each other again?

“Maybe its better,” Harry shook his head at her and kept talking, “I know what you're going to say, but you getting out while you can, that's good Hermione.”

Hermione sat up at this. “Harry Potter, how could you possibly? Haven't I said it a million times before? I'm here. I'm meant to be here. This is my place.” Her voice cracked on the last part.

Harry took a chance and looked at her. Tears filled her eyes and her chin wobbled. “I don't want to go Harry.” The pain laced in her words was enough to break his heart. “Please,” she stopped and took a breath, “don't let them.”

Harry knew that had to have been the hardest thing for her to ask. Hermione never asked for anything, she never asked to be saved. He reached out and tucked some stray hair behind her ear. “I don't really want you to leave, but I want you safe.” He knew this would be about the time she'd state that it was not because of him that she was being hunted. “I know what you're thinking and you're right. The fact that you're my best friend is just an added bonus in a roundabout way. They're after you because of your intelligence. You know entirely too much and that's been a bit too helpful for me. So, they need you out of the picture.”

“Lupin said this?”

“Yes.”

“Couldn't I just disguise myself….polyjuice? I mean that would work and then I could…” Her voice died off and she shook her head. “Why would they do this?”

Before he knew it, Hermione had thrown herself into his arms and had begun sobbing onto his shoulder. All he could do was listen and offer her a last place of comfort before she was cast back into a world that was no longer familiar.

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Text from the Wayback Machine's capture of the site, 6 June 2008.

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