Title: Absence of Red
Author: Jori
Pairing/Rating: H/Hr NC-17
Deathly Hallow Spoilers everywhere since it is set during the book
All errors of canon and spelling and grammar are mine. The characters are not mine.
Summary: Harry is cold and tired. He and Hermione take a moment out from trying to get themselves killed in order to warm up. Nothing too deep and serious here. Just one shot smut where smut needed to be put in the book. Of course there are some mentions of those other people. You know, the ones with the ginger hair. But they don't appear in the story. :)
Somewhere in the Forest of Dean...
Harry was facing down another simple and very brown lunch made of mushrooms and whatever else he and Hermione gathered before the snow began to drift in around their ankles faster than they could walk. Hermione also thought she could hear someone or something moving slowly through the woods so they hurried back to the camp as quickly as they could and even considered breaking camp and moving on except they were simply too tired to fight with the weather.
His spoon clattered on the side of the tin bowl as he imagined something better popping up from the Hogwarts kitchen, or even from Aunt Petunia's refrigerator, but it was still mushrooms no matter what. Hermione had already put her unfinished meal aside and returned to her reading. He wished she would eat more but over the last few days, she barely touched her food.
"It's so cold today," said Hermione, wrapping a worn yellow and green patchwork quilt around her. She wore a heavy woolen jumper that Harry was sure had been knit by hand by Mrs. Weasley but in this weather, it wasn't enough. Harry nodded in agreement, reaching for a little blue flame and moving it beside her.
"The next time we decide to take one of these family camping trips, we really need to consider doing it in the summer," said Harry. He noticed that the corner of Hermione's mouth tugged up slighting into something that was nearly a smile. It didn't last long before she went back to reading one of her many books, frowning and thinking once more. There wasn't much else to do around here but read and wait and think.
And freeze.
He was tired of the cold. Tired of the gray gloom that hung over them and hung over the countryside. He was just tired. Harry hated to think it but it was hard in moments like this to not think that maybe being dead was a better option. Fast and painless. No more running. No more cold. No more...
"Harry?"
No more Hermione. No more friends. No more... more of whatever may come next.
"Yes?"
"You're shivering. Come here," commanded Hermione. His dark thoughts had kept him from noticing his chattering teeth. He wasn't any colder than usual. What else could be expected from a tent in the middle of winter, even a magic tent? They were going to be cold.
Hermione took her wand and with a simple charm, the overstuffed chair the color of a burnt orange she was sitting on was now big enough for two. He sat beside her and she fussed with the blankets until the were both covered, sharing the warmth. She continued reading her old leather-bound tome and he watched her. It was odd. Harry was with her so often but he didn't really notice her. She was so grown up, so different than that little girl he met on the train years ago. She was brilliant and rather lovely. She should be at Hogwarts with boys crawling all over her or at least with Ron crawling all over her. Instead, it was just the two of them. When the going got tough, it was often just the two of them. Funny, that.
"Is something wrong? Is there something on my face?" asked Hermione, once again shaking Harry from his thoughts.
"Wha-- no! I was just thinking," said Harry. He pulled Hermione's feet onto his lap and rubbed her stockinged feet. It was a rare moment that they let their guard down long enough to take off their shoes. Always on the run and always ready to go.
She didn't ask what he was thinking about and perhaps that was because she thought she already knew. He was supposed to always be thinking about the same thing -- or rather things. Horcruxes. What she didn't realize was he was a boy after all, a man, really, and sometimes, his thoughts did drift. Along with his fingers.
Hermione fell still as his touch moved from her feet up her denim clad legs. He wasn't sure what he was doing or what he was looking for in doing so. He didn't know what he wanted to find if this went anywhere and she didn't push him away. Reassurance? Escape? A different kind of trouble?
"Harry?" Her voice was so soft he might have just heard the wind blowing outside. It might have just been snow scraping down the side of the tent. It might have been a lot of things had it not been for the fact that her hand was now resting on top of his, guiding him.
It wasn't with her usual confidence but he could feel the tug none the less. He was tumbling her way, falling against her before he could stop himself. Did he want to stop himself? His thoughts flashed quickly to others... and then back again. They weren't here. They didn't know what it was like to be them. To be in this and to stick with it.
At first it was just slow and lazy touching, her hand moving up and down his arm while his hand touched her leg. They looked into each others eyes, captured in a long, knowing gaze. They were in this together to the end.
He kissed her. Their first real kiss, not just one on the cheek or on the forehead or one as they said goodbye. A kiss with the intention of something more. Hands fumbled around each trying to get the other in the perfect place. Nothing could really get more perfect than this, though.
Hermione ended up straddling his lap, the need for the bigger chair suddenly gone. Even though layers of fabric, the feel of her against him was enough to sent a crackle of energy up his spine and muddle his brain. He wasn't sure she was aware she was doing it, but she was rocking and it was maddening. Did she know what she was doing to him?
Her lips were soft against his and he swore he could feel her quiver ever so slightly against his touch. Was she nervous? He didn't know how experienced Hermione really was. It wasn't something that came up in their conversations in the common room very often.
"Did you ever do it... with Krum?" asked Harry and Hermione drew back from him, blushing.
"No! We did... things... but not that. No, I didn't. Not with anyone," she admitted, casting her eyes down as if she should be embarrassed about it. "You? How about you? You and...."
"No, me neither. It was close a few times but it didn't happen," said Harry, tilting her chin up so they were once again looking at each other.
"How close?" asked Hermione curiously.
"Hermione!"
"I was just wondering!"
"Not close enough, okay?" said Harry.
"I think I should tell you, before anything happens, that I peeked," said Hermione, still staring into his eyes.
"Peeked?"
"When I was you, with the Polyjuice. I peeked."
Now his face and ears were burning pink and he groaned loudly. "Why?" he asked, wondering who else might have taken a quick look. It seemed like a rather silly thing to do considering people were trying to kill them at the time and surely they had better things to think about than how he looked without his pants on.
"Curiosity. I thought I might die at any moment and I wanted to know," she said in a matter of fact tone.
"And what did you think?" he asked, making her blush.
"Not bad. I'd like to see more," said Hermione, her eyes hungrily traveling over his body.
"And I think it's only fair that I get to see what you have under there," said Harry, his hands sweeping up under her heavy jumper and across her smooth skin.
"I think... I'm sure you'll get a chance to do that," said Hermione. She drew in a deep breath and threw her head back when he cupped her breasts. There was too much fabric between them. Too much fabric separating them. Too much space between them. Too much... he didn't know. His head was swimming and for the first time in a long time, it was in a good way.
Harry helped her pull the soft blue jumper over her head and tossed it aside. He stared at her, his fingers aching to touch where her white bra met her skin. Now that so much of her skin was exposed to the cold air, she shivered as he brushed his fingers over her arm.
"Would it be warmer if we went to the bed?" he asked, looking over at the bunk beds. He wasn't sure how it would be warmer and he certainly wasn't sure how there would be any more room in the lower bunk. It was what it was and it seemed to be the best they had at the moment.
"I have an idea," said Hermione, who grabbed her wand and began directing and moving blankets and pillows around the room and to the floor. Some of the furniture marched out of the way, creating an open space in the center of the tent and more flames popped up and seemed to float above them. They weren't incredibly warm but the effect was nice.
They kneeled before one another on the soft pile of blankets and as her fingers wrapped around his, it looked as if they were about to exchange some sort of vows. The look in her eyes told him everything he needed to know. No matter what happened here and no matter what happened later, she would always stick by him. This might lead to nothing more than one warm night together on the tent floor but they would always be something more.
She let go of his hands, tugged his shirt over his head and tossed it aside. Hermione's hands explored his chest and and he did nothing but let his arms hang to the side and watched her fingers move gracefully across his skin, spelling out something he couldn't make out. She repeated the pattern over and over and he reached for her hand, stopping her and kissing her fingers one by one.
"What are you doing?" he whispered, pulling her close and feeling her nearly naked torso next to his.
"A series of figures... a protection of sorts... to keep you safe if I can't be there. I was reading about them earlier. It works best on bare skin," she said, their mouths nearly touching.
"Thanks. I need all the help I can get," said Harry.
There was no space in between them. His mouth was on hers and he was enjoying this kiss more than he had any other kiss he had ever received in his life. Maybe because he knew this was probably it or this thing between them wouldn't last more than a few days but he was going to enjoy this time with Hermione like it was his last days on earth.
He pulled her down so they were lying side by side on the thick quilts, still kissing, hands still exploring as much as possible. Hermione's tongue darted out and brushed his lips, gaining entrance all too easily. This was all happening way too easily but he wasn't ready to stop it. This one kiss seemed to go on a lifetime as they both played back and forth with the other's tongue, exploring deeper and harder with each passing second.
They ended up under the blankets, in a bubble of warmth, when they finally came up for air.
"You do kiss very well. I always figured you would," Hermione said with a knowing smirk on her face. Harry assumed Hermione had heard more than enough from Ginny by now. Ginny. A pang of guilt spread through him but he pushed it back. Ginny wasn't here. Ginny didn't know what they were going through. He pushed any thoughts of her away.
Harry and Hermione fumbled around with clothes and undergarments and soon enough were naked, giving their hands so many more places to explore. It was like a different way to satisfy the hunger that lingered over them so often now. Their mouths had something to taste and he settled his lips against her neck, enjoying the salty sweetness he found there.
He was painfully hard and he noticed that she was going out of her way not to touch that part of him. Harry needed to feel her hand on him so he guided her there, watching as a flush of pink touched her cheeks. Her shyness passed quickly and it didn't take long for her to wrap her fingers gently around his cock and stroke him with a soft, easy touch.
"You can do that a little harder. It won't break," mumbled Harry and she winced.
"I didn't think it would. Besides, I don't break everybody's wand," said Hermione, adding a wonderful amount of pressure to her strokes. Right now, he could care less about magic and wands and spells. This was a different kind of magic than he had ever known, one as old as time, and it was all he was interested in.
Harry jerked away, afraid he would come too soon, and focused on her body instead. She needed more kissed, he decided, definitely more kisses. Kisses from her mouth down to wherever she would let him go. She let him go far, farther than he'd ever been with anyone else. Past her breasts, leaving small kissing across her nipples, and down her stomach. The muscles all fluttered as he brushed his mouth over her belly button. Her legs dropped open when he got down there, now buried under the blankets.
Hermione moaned sweetly as his tongue touched her there, and Harry wasn't sure how he knew what to do but it seemed to be coming to him so easily. When she made that sound, it was the right thing to do. When she moved like she just did, pushing against his face until his glasses fell off, it was certainly the right thing to do.
His tongue danced and twirled against her and he could feel her body stiffen and relax. Did she... did he just make her... he didn't know. He was too scared to ask. Her fingers tangled into his messy hair and pulled his mouth closer to her and he had his answer.
"Just... oh, a little more..."
He gave her what she wanted, moving his fingers gently in and out of her as he did so. Her body was pressing against him with the determination he would naturally expect to come from Hermione Granger. Even with this experience, she wasn't going to let an aspect of it pass her by.
She sighed and now he felt her body really spasm and release. He had no question about it now. He had made her come and he had enjoyed it nearly as much as she had. He crawled out of under the blankets, watching Hermione come back down from wherever it was she was floating, her eyes finally focusing on his.
"Your turn?" she asked, kissing him and tasting herself upon his lips. She pulled away and considered it for a moment before kissing him again.
"Only if you want to," said Harry, hoping to hell that she wanted to.
"Yes," she said in a soft and tentative voice. He knew it was something she could only give away once and he was happy she was willing to consider him... well, to want him like this. Maybe this was her way of seeing what it was like. Maybe this was some sort of pity sex, for breaking his wand, but Harry doubted it. That certainly wasn't Hermione's style. Maybe it was more 'end of the world' sex. Maybe. He didn't care. He was glad she was smiling for a change. Harry was happy that he was able to make her smile instead of just being the one to drag her into on preposterous situation after another. Not that this wasn't just a little preposterous. He was about to have sex with one of his best friends, after all.
They scooted around until they were centered on the blankets again, an old quilt covered in roses pulled over them. Hermione's blue flames flickered wildly above them, as if they were feeding on her nervous emotions.
"Um, I think you have to.... right. Like that," said Harry, trying to figure out the next step so they would both stay warm and no one would get hurt.
He settled in between her legs, feeling her press her thighs against his side, and he fumbled around for a while before his brain started to work again if only for a second.
"Everything is safe, right?" he asked, barely able to hang on much longer. He needed to sink into her so badly right now that he could feel every quiver her body made. She nodded and that was all he needed to know.
Slowly, he pushed in, stopping when she gasped. Hermione wrapped a hand around his neck, her fingers holding onto his hair. It was only when she let up her grasp that he pushed in further, finding no more resistance. She pushed back against him, her body so wet around his that he had no sense where he ended and where she began.
Her hands slid across his back and he was amazed that he could be sweating in this cold tent but he was. She was also covered with a slight sheen of sweat and their bodies tried to stick together at every point of contact.
Things were swirling. Twirling. Things were flowing away faster than he could catch up to them. This was better than he had imagined. Better than a full belly and warmth. This was warmth defined, actually.
Hermione would stay through everything with him. Hermione would trust him through anything. She even trusted him with this, with her heart and with her body. He never wanted either to be hurt or broken.
He slipped in and out, knowing that he couldn't hold on very long. It was too good. It was what made the struggle worth while. It exploded in blinding flashes of blue and white in his head. It was....
Over way too soon.
Harry let out an enormous groan as he came, his body shuddering over top of Hermione's. She wrapped her slender legs tightly around his hips as if she wanted to draw every last drop from him, and he let her. He could barely catch his breath, his face pressed the side of hers. They were a tangle of sticky bodies and messy hair and confused thoughts.
Pulling out of her, Harry covered them up with even more blankets and waited to see what would happen next. Hermione had to be thinking about it. She was always thinking about something.
"If he comes back, if he finds out somehow, what will we tell him?" asked Hermione. Harry shrugged nervously and had to think about it for a moment. It didn't pass his notice that she didn't use Ron's name. He certainly didn't feel like mentioning Ginny's name right now while he was snuggled close to a very naked and warm Hermione.
"If he ever suspects anything, I'll tell him I love you like a sister," said Harry.
"Do you? Is that how you really feel about me?" asked Hermione, propping herself up on one elbow to look into his eyes.
This time it didn't take him that long to answer.
"First of all, if I did love you that way, I don't think this would have ever happened. Second, I don't think our relationship can be defined that easily, Hermione. I love you. You know that and I know you love me. But I also know you love him. I love him, too. He's my best friend. You both are," said Harry, letting out a soft sigh. It was all very complicated. Everything was complicated and this certainly wasn't going to make things easier.
"They might not even be alive by now," said Hermione softly, a quiet terror in her voice. Harry knew who the 'they' implied and he didn't want to consider it right now. He didn't want to think of a world without Ginny anymore than she wanted to consider a world without Ron.
"No, they might not."
"And then we might not be.... after that last, it's only, oh, Harry..."
"But we are now," said Harry, reassuring her the best he could. "We're alive and I am sure they are, too."
"Oh, how did we get into this mess?" asked Hermione with a mirthful laugh.
"Which one?"
"This one," she added as she nestled in beside him again, doubling up their warmth. She wrapped a bare leg over him, causing a rush of arousal to flow through his body again.
"Hermione, out of all the messes we've ever been in, I have to say, this is one is definitely the best yet," said Harry.
"It's not bad. Not bad at all," agreed Hermione. "Hey, Harry? I know it's late, but Happy Christmas."
"Yeah, Christmas," said Harry absentmindedly, trying to figure out exactly what was today's date. He knew Christmas had gone by but he didn't really know when. This year, there were no evergreen trees dripping in ornaments. No packages wrapped in holiday paper. A day ago? Two days? "Happy Christmas to you, too, Hermione."
With that, he pulled the blankets over their heads and shut out the rest of the world if only for the moment.
The End
Thank you, JKR, for making me never want to write again with one book and making me write again with the next. Probably not your intention with the whole shipping set up in your story but some of us are perfectly happy living with our ships in our heads. At least then the epilogues aren't so bad. :)