This whole fiasco was Lily's fault, James grumbled to himself as he ignored another of his best friend's taunts about poufs in tights and handed him the requested butterbeer. If she weren't so damned irresistible, he would never have gotten himself into this predicament.
It was Halloween Night, and James Potter had elected to dress as Superman for the party that he and his brand new wife were hosting. Or, as he maintained, he had been bamboozled into wearing this ridiculous costume.
The whole thing had begun innocently enough, in the aftermath of a particularly unpleasant argument between James and his then-fiancŽe. She had been stressed by last-minute wedding preparations; he had been tired from a long day at the Auror Academy. One thoughtless comment had embroiled them in a heated debate that had continued to escalate until they both realized they were arguing over a mere miscommunication.
*************
"You're right," Lily said with a little sigh. "I just thought that earlier, when you said-" But she stopped herself and shook her head. "Nevermind." Instead of finishing the thought, she stepped forward and slid her arms around James' waist.
In response, he leaned down to kiss her forehead and grinned apologetically down at her.
"Naw, Lily, you know I get all mucked up when you're around," he said. "I can't think straight."
James gave a self-deprecating little laugh, and then continued, "I was reading some article in an American paper about a picture book series. ItÕs called Superman, or something? About some bloke who flies around wearing a skin-suit and saving the world and such. IÕm not so much a fan of the tights, but I did identify with one thing. YouÕre my Kryptonite.Ó
From what he understood, Kryptonite was some bright green rock that made Superman powerless. While more often than not, Lily built him up and made him feel stronger and somehow more whole, when they fought he fell to pieces. He hoped this wasnÕt a horrible thing to say. He had had enough fighting for one day. Rather nervously, he peered down at her, but she was smiling back at him.
Lily, it seemed, found the analogy rather touching. The corner of her lips quirked in a smile as she responded, "Aww that's kind of cute. I didn't know you read the Muggle papersÉ" With a more serious expression, she said, "But regardless of that, I shouldn't have blown up at you. I'm sorry, love."
Relieved that the tempest was over, James answered, "Don't worry about it, and I'm sorry too." Then he glanced towards the clock on the mantle and asked, "Do you want to get some dinner now? Or I can er.. help you finish those invitations we were supposed to be addressing."
But Lily just shook her head. Though it was dinnertime, she wasn't hungry at the moment. Her imagination had been caught by James' mentioning of the caped crusader. After all, Halloween was coming up fairly soonÉ
"Orrrrr we could talk more about you being Superman," she suggested, her eyes glinting devilishly as she rose on tiptoe to press a persuasive little kiss to the corner of his mouth. "I find the idea of you in tights and a cape veeeeeeery appealing." So appealing, in fact, that she couldn't resist pressing the slightest bit closer to him and leaning up for a kiss.
James' lips turned up in an arrogant grin, and he leaned down to take both her hands and tug her against his chest.
"You do, huh?" he murmured as he bent down to claim her lips.
"Uh huh. You need a costume for our Halloween party," Lily explained when they broke apart a few moments later.
"Oh we're having a Halloween party?" he asked, more amused than amenable to the idea. Dressing up in a silly costume (especially one that included tights) was not his idea of a party.
But Lily was determined to make her mental image a reality, so she rose on tiptoe and began pressing soft little kisses to the spot on his neck that she knew would garner a favorable response.
"We are now," she murmured, in between kisses. "C'mon, it'll be fun."
James considered this for a moment and was about to say no when he happened to look down and notice the pleading expression in her vivid green eyes.
That was his first mistake.
As he watched, her gaze changed from pleading to devious.
"If you'll be Superman," she wheedled, "I'll go as Wonder Woman."
He was on the verge of shaking his head and telling her to give up when the picture that had accompanied the article he'd read rose in his mind's eye. Wonder Woman, eh? An instant later, the picture of Wonder Woman was replaced with an image of Lily in the super heroine's skimpy outfit. He grinned. Oh yes, she would make a very fetching Wonder WomanÉ
That was his second mistake.
Lily, reading the indecision in his gaze, pressed her advantage further.
"Say yes, Jamie," she pleaded and leaned upwards until her softly pouting lips were mere millimeters from his.
Unable to resist such temptation, James shrugged and muttered, "Oh why the hell not," as he closed the gap between them and kissed her soundly.
That was his third and final mistake.
********************
"I mean.. blimey, Prongs!" Sirius continued, leaning against the kitchen counter and smirking at James. "I knew married life would have you whipped in no time, but I didn't know it'd turn you into a pouf."
Sirius, of course, was clad in what he would deem an appropriately masculine costume, inspired by the motorbike he had recently bought himself and which he and James were still working on charming to fly. His hair, which he hadn't cut in far too long, was pulled into a pony tail at the nape of his neck, and he was clad in the traditional biker gear of black leather boots, chaps and jacket.
Before James could respond, Lily walked up behind them and asked, "Who's a pouf? Have you finally admitted it, Sirius?"
"Woah, Red, nice costume!" he responded, ignoring her question altogether and giving her an exaggerated once-over.
James shot a mock glare at his best friend.
"Oi! That's my wife you're talking to," he protested.
"Well she won't be for long if you keep dressing like that," Sirius retorted.
Lily rolled her eyes at Sirius and informed him, "You may think it looks ridiculous, but every woman in this room would beg to differ," Lily informed him. Then she slid an arm around James' waist and looked up at him with a none-too-innocent smile as she added, "Myself included. You look dead sexy, love."
Both men stared at her in disbelief, then scanned the room to verify her claim. James' lips curved in a satisfied smirk as he realized Lily was telling the truth. A substantial majority of their female guests seemed to be casting appreciative glances in his direction.
"See? It takes a real man to be this comfortable with his masculinity," he informed his best friend with an air of superiority.
Sirius raised an eyebrow in skepticism.
"By wearing tights?"
"Well if you've got itÉ," Lily muttered.
At that moment, Marlene McKinnon appeared beside them, dressed as a pixie in a blue mini dress. She'd even charmed her hair and skin blue for the occcasion.
"Got what?" she asked, pulling her best friend close for a hug. "Great party, Lily." As she turned to James, her eyes widened and she winked at him, saying, "Nice costume, James." Glancing over at Sirius, she smiled and added, "H'lo, Black."
Sirius looked affronted that her compliment had not been directed at him, and James, reading the expression on his best friend's face, smirked all the wider.
"Thanks, Marlene. Same to you," he responded.
"Thanks," Marlene said as her eyes drifted over the crowd of guests. "Oooooh, Mary's here already! I'll see you three later." Then, with a smile and a wave, she disappeared into the crowd.
James nudged Sirius in the ribs and teased, "Maybe you outta have taken a leaf out of my book, Padfoot."
The only response he received was a grumbled, "Humph" as Sirius downed a swig of butterbeer.
"I suppose you could always be RobinÉ" Lily suggested.
Both men stared at her in confusion. Neither one recognized the name, as they hadn't grown up on a steady diet of comic books like most Muggle boys their age had.
"Huh?" Sirius queried.
Lily laughed and shook her head.
"Nevermind," she said. "The biker thing works on you. What do you say we go ahead and cut the cake?"
"Now that is something we all can agree on," Sirius replied, looking with eager interest towards the kitchen counter, where a five-layer cake in the shape of a giant spider rested on top of a pumpkin-shaped platter.
James crossed the kitchen, opened a drawer by the oven, and pulled out a long knife, which he handed to his wife.
"I'll let you do the honors, Lils," he said, knowing the cake was Lily's masterpiece. She had spent all day slaving over it, and, having spent most of the day smelling it, James was quite keen to actually eat a slice.
Knife in hand, Lily began cutting into the cake, and soon pieces were being passed around to all the guests. Whether it was the influence of the cake or of Lily's earlier comments that had mollified him, Sirius cast no further aspersions on James' masculinity.
"I suppose you two do match and all," he admitted around a mouthful of chocolate cake.
James grinned and nodded in the general direction of Lily's scantily-clad bum.
"Yeah, well do you think I'd have worn this thing for any other reason?" he asked.
Sirius nearly choked on his next bite of cake as he realized what James was implying. Once he had safely swallowed his food, he chuckled and clapped James on the back.
"Genius, Prongs. That is pure genius," he said.
"I know," James responded. His gaze was dragged back across
As he laughed and shrugged off the compliment, his gaze was drawn back across the kitchen by the sight of Lily bending forward across the counter to hand out another slice of cake. Maybe dressing up for Halloween hadn't been such a bad idea after all.