DISCLAIMER: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling (Harry Potter series), George Bernard Shaw (Pygmalion), various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, Warner Bros., Inc and the MGM movies. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
My Fair Lady- Parvarti's Quidditch Pitch
Harry was stunned. "The what?"
"The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain," repeated Hermione. She had a glazed look on her face, still damp with tears, as if she was a porcelain doll.
Draco turned again in his sleep, this time towards the floor, and fell head first to the floor. "What have I missed?" he said sleepily as he picked himself up. "Look, Potter, I know you are doing your best to help Hermione here, but you are really going too far."
Harry silenced his friend with a wave of his arm. "Shh! Hermione, say that again." Harry wasn't tired at all now. He could feel energy flowing into his body as he stared continuously at Hermione.
"The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain," Hermione said once again dully. However, she caught Harry staring at her, and thus looked back at him with confusion. "What? Oh!" Hermione realized what was happening when she saw Draco's dropped jaws. "The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain!" Hermione's face lit up with a radiant glow. She knew then that she had done it right.
Harry leapt to his feet, and for the first time since Hermione had moved in, Harry laughed.
"The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain," Harry echoed happily as he grabbed Hermione forcefully and hugged her. "The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain!"
Harry had forgotten all of his troubles as he swung Hermione around by her waist. He had forgotten the main reason he refused to be nice to Hermione at all, and he had also forgotten that he was never to let a woman into his life.
The moment was priceless, as Harry's study was filled with laughter of the three occupants. Draco also joined in as he realized that the torture of teaching Hermione and working with Harry was about to be over.
Almost immediately, Harry pulled out his wand and pointed at Hermione. "Recordantimos!" he exclaimed while gesturing for Hermione to speak.
"The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain," Hermione sang happily.
The magic quill immediately leapt to life and scribbled on the parchment beneath it.
"Wonderful! Faultless! Very good vowels!" yelled Draco as he picked up the parchment and read the result.
Harry jumped around happily and pulled Hermione along with him. He put a hand on her waist and waltzed around the room. When they waltzed near his desk, he reached out and pulled another sheet from his desk. He gave the piece of paper to Hermione to read.
"In Hartford, Hereford and Hampshire, hurricanes hardly happen," sang Hermione.
Draco read off the magic quill report again. "Good H's. Very well done."
Harry yelled, as he lifted Hermione into the air, "You did it! Hermione, you did it!"
Suddenly, the study door opened and revealed a very tired looking Lavender. "Harry? What's going on here? Draco? Hermione? What on earth was all that noise about?"
The three turned towards her curiously. "Noise? What noise?" asked a seemingly puzzled Harry.
Draco also shook his head wildly. "There hasn't been any sound at all. Lavender, you must be dreaming." Hermione just stood by with a dreamy look on her face, as she must have been more than happy about her achievements.
Lavender stared at them. "No, I was woken by a series of loud sounds. Are you sure there hasn¡¦t been anything going on here?"
Harry grinned widely. "Lavender, you must be getting old. You are hearing noises. Maybe you have finally found the gift Trelawney predicted, many years ago, that you should have gotten."
Lavender rolled her eyes, as Harry just would not stop teasing her about her old fascination with their Divination teacher. "Really, Harry, would you please look at the time? It's three-thirty in the morning! What on earth are you doing at this hour of night?"
Draco interrupted with a big toothy smile. "We were teaching Hermione, of course, and guess what? She's got it!"
Lavender glanced at Hermione's direction for a second, and then immediately after, exploded. "Look at what you've done to the poor girl! Potter and Malfoy, you two have driven the poor dear insane!" Lavender grabbed Hermione by her arm and pulled her towards the door. "Come dear, it's time for bed. Don't listen to these idiots. As for you two, you'd better go to bed right now before I hex you into next millennium!"
"Of course, Miss Brown!" Harry and Draco grinned from ear to ear as they bowed to Lavender and headed toward their rooms. They talked excitedly as they walked away.
"Shall we test her out?"
"Not so soon, Potter. Not so soon."
"But that would be fun, and I think she could do it. What about next week's Quidditch match at my sister's place? We have a week to teach her all the general knowledge, just to make sure she doesn't try to do spells or anything, so then she'd be all right."
"Maybe, I don't know."
Meanwhile, Lavender tugged Hermione by her sleeves. "Come dear, you should be in bed too." She snapped her fingers and two sleepy maids in their nightdresses appeared.
Hermione followed Lavender's tugs reluctantly. She complained as Lavender and the two other maids pulled her along. "Bed! Bed! I can¡¦t go to bed! My head's too light to try and set it down! Sleep! Sleep! I can¡¦t sleep tonight! Not for all the jewels in the crown! I could have danced all night, and still have begged for more. I could have spread my wings and done a thousand things I've never done before. I'll never know what made it so exciting; why all at once my heart took flight. I only know that when he began to dance with me I could have danced all night!"
Lavender and the two maids all shook their heads and sighed in unison. "The poor soul has been driven mad."
Hermione couldn't care less of what the others thought about her. She was still dazed by the fact that she could speak proper English now, and that Harry had just danced with her. How she longed to be back in Harry's arms! It had been the most pleasant time Hermione had ever had in her entire life, not to mention that it was really her first dance ever.
The two maids pulled Hermione's nightdress on for her, and Lavender tucked her in. "I understand, dear, that it¡¦s all been grand. But now it's time to sleep," Lavender said sternly to the overwhelmed girl. "Good night, and have pleasant dreams."
The three left Hermione in the dark and went back to their beds. However, Hermione still wasn't finished yet. She leapt up from her bed and began to dance on the floor. She didn't knew what it meant, but all she knew was that she was very happy and she really enjoyed dancing with Harry. She spun and twirled until she was no longer conscious.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A very pleasant week went by. Hermione's speech was now more than perfect. Harry and Draco agreed to take Hermione out to the first Quidditch match of the season. They had been trying to fill Hermione with as much common knowledge of the wizarding world as possible.
It wasn't as though Hermione wasn't learning anything. In fact, both Harry and Draco discovered that she was a fast learner, and all of her problems in learning had disappeared once her speech problem had been solved. She no longer needed to be locked up and practice her speech. She was free to go anywhere she liked and have as much chocolate as she wanted. Whenever Harry and Draco weren't telling her about the wizarding world, she would be reading about it in Harry's library. Being the vigorous reader she was, Hermione read Hogwarts: A History, Quidditch Through the Ages and The Standard Book of Spells: Grade One by the end of the week. Both Harry and Draco thought that she would be fine at the match. However, things sometimes never went as they were originally planned.
"Remember, Hermione, no magic today," Harry reminded her once more before he gave her the Floo powder in front of the fireplace. "I know you've read all about the spells, but you are not to do any such magic today. Be good and remember that you are a witch now, not a Muggle."
Hermione nodded nervously. She was dressed in a pretty dark blue robe, with her new wand tucked safely away in the pocket. She had gone shopping with Lavender the day before in Diagon Alley. Slowly, Hermione stepped into the fireplace and reached out for the Floo powder.
"Remember to speak clearly, and don't run around once you get there. Parvati, Harry's sister and the owner of the pitch, will be there waiting for you," Draco reminded her again as Harry handed Hermione the Floo powder.
"Parvati's Quidditch Pitch!" Hermione squealed in a very high-pitched voice. Then, with a bang, she was gone.
"I just hope she lands in the right place," Harry muttered. Even his annoyed voice couldn¡¦t conceal the anxiety he felt.
Draco took one look at Harry's face and understood immediately what he was feeling. "Don't worry, she'll be fine."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Hermione got to the Quidditch pitch all right. As soon as she had landed, a pretty girl with dark hair came up to her and greeted her in a friendly manner.
"You must be Harry's sister, Parvati!" exclaimed Hermione. She was very excited, because she hadn't spoken to any other witches or wizards apart from Harry, Draco, Lavender and the other maids and servants.
Parvati nodded. "Yes, that's me. You know, it's such a pain in the backside having him as a brother. He can be very annoying. Harry..." Parvati didn't have a chance to finish her sentence, for someone else landed in the fireplace.
"I what?" came Harry's voice.
Parvati turned. "No, nothing! I was just telling Hermione what a good brother you have been."
Harry raised a questioning eyebrow. "Really?" He didn't press the subject further, because he spotted someone standing behind Hermione at that precise moment. "Ron! Over here!"
"Hi Harry!" a tall and redheaded man waved as he walked over. "What have you been up to these days? Still obsessed with that nephonic job you got?"
Harry laughed. "Yeah, more than ever. And Ron, it¡¦s phonetic."
Ron's eyes suddenly darted towards Hermione's direction. "Hey, who's this pretty girl you've got here, Harry? Are you sure you've just been working these days?" Ron wriggled his eyebrows.
"Oh stop it!" Harry complained loudly. "You always say that when I'm near a girl. Don't be silly. Allow me to introduce you to Miss Hermione Granger. She had recently moved here from the United States of America around the same time Malfoy came around. They are both staying in my house at the moment. Hermione, this is Ronald Weasley, my best friend all throughout Hogwarts."
"Malfoy!" growled Ron as Draco stepped out of the fireplace. "I still don't like him, you know."
Hermione immediately threw herself in Draco's defense. "Mr. Weaslet, I think you are very much mistaken. Draco is a very nice man."
"It's Weasley, and you, my pretty, should spend less time with that Malfoy. He could corrupt you for life!" Ron told Hermione as he led her to the Quidditch stand. "Now, tell me more about yourself. I'd love to get to know you more."
Harry glared at Ron as he and Hermione walked away. He turned around and found Draco smirking with his infamous "Malfoy Smirk".
"I would never let a woman in my life," mimicked Draco as he smirked.
"Oh shut up, Malfoy!" Harry then found Draco very annoying and walked towards Ron and Hermione. "You are insane. I haven't let any woman into my life."
"...So Harry telephoned Draco in India and asked, 'Have you seen my slippers?' Draco was still half asleep due to the time difference, and answered, 'Oh, I ate six last night.'" Hermione¡¦s speech caused Ron to laugh uncontrollably as Harry came over to the two of them.
"You are very amusing, you know. I remember my father telling me about fellytone once. He's obsessed with Muggle inventions. I never paid him any attention, though. I swear he could never make an example as funny as yours." Ron looked admiringly and adoringly at Hermione.
Harry coughed. "Ahem! The match is starting."
The pitch was silent as the Quidditch players from both of the opposing teams, Puddlemere United and the Chudley Cannons, mounted their brooms.
The referee walked into the middle and released the Quaffle. All fourteen players kicked off the ground in a blast as the crowd began to cheer loudly.
Hermione knew all about the rules, so her eyes followed the game closely. The game was intense, but Hermione herself found it rather boring. She wished that she could have a book with her.
Suddenly, Hermione spotted the seeker of the Puddlemere United diving straight down towards the ground, causing Hermione to gasp. She had never seen a real Quidditch match before, and didn't know that Quidditch players had all sorts of tricks. Just as everyone fell silent to see if the Puddlemere seeker could catch the Snitch, Hermione began to scream at the top of her lungs.
"Oh my God! That person is going to kill himself! Someone stop him! Quick, before he hits the ground! Help! Someone pull him back up!" Due to Hermione¡¦s screaming, no one, apart from the Puddlemere seeker himself, was paying any attention to the game. Everyone turned to stare at Hermione.
Hermione was still oblivious of what she had done wrong. "Hurry! Don't let him kill himself!"
The seeker was getting closer and closer to the ground: ten feet, five feet, and then two feet. Hermione covered her eyes.
The seeker caught the Snitch just before he hit the ground. However, he was rather puzzled by the absence of the usual cheering and groaning. He looked up and saw everyone staring at a bushy haired brunette.
Just then, someone burst out laughing and the whole pitch followed.
Ron laughed whole-heartedly beside Hermione, as he found her amusing in every way.
Harry and Draco didn't know whether they should laugh with the others or not. They looked away in the other direction and pretended to laugh awkwardly.
Hermione heard the laughter and peeked through her fingers, thus seeing the seeker standing unharmed in the middle of the field with the golden Snitch in his hand. She suddenly realized what had happened.
Hermione began to blush. It started out as a pale shade of pink, and then the color in her cheeks darkened to the shade of Ron's hair. Hermione had no idea how she would ever live this embarrassment down.
A/N: Thank you for reading and reviewing. I haven't got any questions to answer this time, I hope. Anyhow, if you have any questions at all, do ask. I will do my best to answer your questions. Also, a big thank you to my Beta this time- Stella. My Beta for the previous chapter is down with the flu. I do hope she will get better soon.