~*~
Part Nine
~*~
Harry stormed down the path toward Hermione's cabin. He'd gotten just over halfway there when he stopped.
"This is stupid! Why am I doing this?" he turned on his heels and began tearing his way back to his cabin.
"Ugh! This is ridiculous!" he yelled at himself again turning back and hauling toward Hermione's cabin again.
"Wait," he stopped when he was three-quarters of the way there. "Ugh, Potter you are an idiot!" He was standing twenty feet from Hermione's cabin door talking to himself. "Do it, just got talk to her. You're only going to talk to her!"
He sighed in frustration and shook his head. Looking up toward the cabin, he continued forward until he was within arms-length on the doorknob. He stared at it for a moment before making a move to turn and run back to his own cabin. "Potter, quit this and knock." He stopped himself in mid turn and solemnly faced the door.
"This is not a difficult decision, so why are you so afraid you git?!" he'd yet to realize he was still talking out loud to himself. "Hermione is your best friend. You have NO problem talking to her."
He reached for the door knob when it flew open.
"Hermione!" he gasped in shock. She was standing in front of him giving him a strange look.
"I thought I'd heard someone out here," she said. Her voice had slowly tapered so by the end of her sentence until she was nearly whispering. Her expression had also changed. Harry couldn't quite place it, but for some reason, she looked nervous.
"Just me..." he said in the same soft tone as Hermione. He was frozen in front of her like a deer in headlights. It was too late now to turn and run back to his cabin. And if he did, she'd just think he was crazier than ever and it'd put their friendship even worse off. After all, who runs away from their best friend? Harry gulped and kept staring at her instead.
"What?" she finally managed to find her voice, "You're...you're staring." She swallowed a bit too. Harry's direct gaze was making her a bit weak in the knees. "Do I have a bug in my hair?" She giggled as she broke his concentration.
"Oh, no," Harry laughed too. "I just came by to say," he cleared his throat for a moment, "to say that...well, I'm sorry for ignoring you. Not that I was ignoring you!" He covered quickly. 'Idiot! Watch what you say!' "I meant I haven't been ignoring you, I just, I've been...busy...and if it's seemed like that, well, I apologize. You must know what I mean. It's hard watching all these kids," he smiled. He hoped she couldn't see the beads of sweat he was certain adorned his forehead. He was still extremely nervous as he awaited her reaction.
She looked up at him. When he noted her face, something surprised him about it. Her eyes were all misty like they were tearing up. He'd upset her; that was the only thing he could come up with. "Oh, Harry!" She suddenly threw her arms around his neck.
Harry was surprised at first, but the feeling of her in his arms brought him back to his senses. Quickly, he let his arms slide around her. He held her firmly pressed up against him, enough so that he could feel they'd instantly begun to breathe in simpatico. It felt so good. He'd missed everything about her. Her voice, her scent, and especially right now, the way she felt in his arms.
It felt like it had been forever before they finally pulled apart from one another.
~*~
Hermione felt a bit embarrassed as she pulled away from Harry, but being so close to him again, her feelings for him washed away her anxiety. She'd ever forgiven herself for impulsively hugging him. All she could do now, however, was take in the sight of his beautiful face. She'd been so stupid. This was her best friend. And here she'd been, ignoring him and all, and the poor boy had come over and taken the full blame for it.
"Harry, don't be sorry. I've been avo..." she stopped; she didn't want to admit she'd been avoiding him. "It's my fault. I haven't been around for you. You're right, it's been...overwhelming." She didn't mean her campers however; she was speaking about her feelings for him. He just didn't need to know what had been so overwhelming for her.
"'Mione, it's not your fault. If anyone is at fault, just let it be me. I don't want you to feel badly about anything," his eyes pleaded her. She couldn't quite gauge the emotion that she read in them.
"But Harry," she began.
~*~
"Hermione, no. Just leave it alright? We needn't worry about it anymore okay?" he smiled at her. "Why don't we just agree we lo..."
'Oh SHIT!' Harry thought to himself. He'd nearly told her he loved her. 'Don't panic, Potter...cover your ass!'
"Agree that we LOST sight of what was important, and that's our friendship," he breathed a great sigh of relief as he choked out that last part. 'Please don't let her have notice,' he winced inwardly for a moment as he waited to hear how she would respond.
She gave him a puzzled look for a split-second but then responded, "You're right. Friends?" She gave him her trademark winning smile as she extended her hand with a giggle.
"Friends," he laughed too as he took her hand and shook it. He smiled as he tried to ignore the strong tingly feeling he was getting from holding her hand. He wondered if she felt it too as he saw her jump a small bit as their hands connected. He shook it off. 'Just be yourself, Potter. Now what would you do if you were at Hogwarts in the same situation and it was just you and 'Mione, best friends.'
"Hey," he smiled, taking a tighter hold on her wrist and quickly tugged her into another hug. "We're best friends, and we will be forever," he spoke into her hair. It smelled like strawberries. Harry inhaled deeply, taking in the sweet scent, hoping Hermione wouldn't notice. Sure he was being greedy, but he just needed to be close to her. It had been much too long. He was used to spending everyday with her. Even in the past few summers, they'd owled each other as quickly as Hedwig could get back and forth between them.
~*~
'That's right,' thought Hermione. 'This is your *best friend* Harry. Just because he's gorgeous and kind and his deodorant or cologne or whatever he's wearing smells so good doesn't mean you can't just be friends. I hope some of his smell rubs off on my shirt,' Hermione smiled to herself. She didn't want to be anywhere else but in his arms at that moment. She knew she was hopeless; she'd just have to hide her feelings if it meant always being able to see Harry. If they couldn't be together, at least they'd always be friends. And never losing that was worth never having Harry as anything more.
"Hermione??" Meegan's voice cut through the silence as she creaked open the door and accidentally interrupted Harry and Hermione. They pulled away quickly, both blushing furiously. "Oh, I'm sorry!" she covered quickly, taking a step back into the cabin. 'Damnit Meeg,' she chastised herself, 'who knows what you just interrupted!' She sighed to herself. "I just wanted to let you know we were heading to supper in a minute. You might want to come in and get ready," she frowned at what she was saying. She didn't want to stop anything that could have been happening. "See you in a bit," she added as she snuck back into the cabin and softly clicked the door behind her.
Hermione looked up at Harry. She was still blushing a bit. "Thanks for coming over. I'm really glad we got the chance to talk. I don't want it to be another week before we do again."
"I promise. There's nothing more important than spending time with you," he smiled turning to walk away, before he did, he turned back and added, "See you then."
"Bye Harry," she smiled as he walked off toward his cabin with his hands in his pockets.
Hermione watched him for a moment before going back into her cabin. As soon as she did, Meegan charged her and frantically began prodding her for answers.
"I didn't...interrupt anything, did I?" she seemed very excited, "I mean, you two weren't...doing anything, were you?" Meegan blushed a bit.
"Nothing was happening besides Harry coming over to apologize for being distant this past week," Hermione blushed. 'As per usual, I let myself get too swept up in his presence. That was all it was, both of us not wanting to lose a friendship. Not that anything was getting lost,' she began mentally analyzing her and Harry's conversation, 'That's how strong our friendship is. Always keeping close is the most important to both of us,' she smiled, satisfied with her analysis.
"Oh? Why was he being distant?" she seemed interested.
"It wasn't his fault, I took blame as well. We were both just too busy this week, that's it," she blatantly lied about why she was acting the way she had.
"Oh," Meegan seemed upset. "Anyway, shall we head up for supper?" She quickly changed the subject. Hermione agreed and they gathered up their campers and left.
~*~
"I said it before, a lot, and I'll say it again, you're an idiot!" Ron chastised Harry as he finished telling him what had gone on between him and Hermione. "Really now, what's the worst that could happen if you admitted your feeling to her?"
"I don't want to get into this again, Ron," he stuck in head under his bed and began digging around in his bags for a sweatshirt.
"She'll be mad; is that what you're worried about? Even if she was, you know it would be only for a week or so. That girl is too smart to ruin your friendship. She'd let it go. Isn't that what you two just discussed? Being friends no matter what?" Ron said pointedly. He was determined to win, eventually.
"Which is why we should remain just that; friends and only friends. I can't lose her," he stated simply.
"But you're not going to!" Ron sighed in exasperation.
"Isn't it time to eat?" Harry emerged from under his bed holding a blue hooded sweatshirt. Ron sighed as Harry called for their campers. Once everyone was assembled, they left for the lodge to eat supper.
~*~
"Hey," Ron smiled taking a seat next to Meegan at campfire. He and Patrick had led their campers to the wooden benches encircling the fire pit earlier than usual, giving Ron some time to visit with Meegan. Harry was late. He'd lagged behind with a camper who couldn't find his shoe.
"Hey yourself," she smiled as he sat down. He didn't want to draw too much attention from any of the camp directors, so he'd sat as close as possible to Meegan; their hands resting partially on top of each others, rather that hold it outright or put and arm around her. "Any breakthroughs?" She asked suggestively about Harry and Hermione.
"Maybe a regression," he sighed, running his pinky up and down her's calmingly. "I don't know about those two. Harry said he spoke with her, made amends for being an ass the past week, but he refuses to own up to his feelings still. His new excuse isn't to deny them, but rather to say he'll 'ruin their friendship'. I swear that git is all excuses." Ron looked rather perturbed at his friends' mutual idiocy.
"Hermione's not much better. She said the same thing Harry told you. I just wish those two would say something. As soon as one of them does, the other will blurt it out too and they'll be snogging faster than you can say 'couple'," she sighed as well.
"No kidding," he rolled his eyes. "And it's not as if we can just tell one of them the other likes them. First off neither would believe us; the way they're carrying on. Secondly, they'd probably think we were playing a mean trick on them and stop talking to us. Bloody good that would do."
"I do see your point," Meegan sighed. They'd have to come up with a way to get those two to admit their feelings, on their own.
~*~
Harry led Joshua, one of his campers, down the darkened path to campfire. Glancing at his watch, he saw they weren't yet late. Still they hustled though, just to be sure. As they spotted their group, Harry noticed Ron had naturally led them next to Hermione and Meegan's group and that he was currently deep in conversation with Meegan. Joshua ran off to sit next to his friends leaving Harry to spot a seat.
Glancing at the full benches he noticed there was one seat left open, next to Hermione. He smiled as he walked over. "Is this seat taken?" he joked as he sat down.
Hermione, who'd been sitting with her hands on her chin and staring into the flames, shot her head up startled by Harry's sudden appearance, "Oh, hello Harry. No of course not," she looked as if she blushed, but Harry waved it off, assuming it was the glow of the fire dancing off her skin.
Harry watched her for a moment and then looked up at the sky. The stars above were twinkling brightly. He looked back over at Hermione; she'd too tipped her head heavenward. Harry assumed she must have wanted to see whatever it was he was looking at. "They're beautiful tonight, aren't they?" He looked back up.
"They are," she said softly.
Harry, still looking up, shifted his weight to ease the crane on his neck. He'd began to slide his hand toward Hermione, to adjust his seating position, when it came into contact with something soft and smooth. It took him a second to realize it was Hermione's hand. At the contact, they both snapped their hands back; and their heads back, looking directly at each other. For a moment, Harry didn't know what to do. Should he apologize? Hermione's reaction wasn't helping much either. She was giving him a rather curious look. Almost as if to ask why he'd been so embarrassed; like she was that undesirable. Before he could open his mouth, however, the slight sad tinge in her eyes disappeared and was filled with her own embarrassment.
"Okay, campfire time!!!!!!!!!!!!" Greg bellowed over everyone. He was standing at the helm by the fire, ready to start some singing. Harry and Hermione's trance was once again broken as they turned their attention toward Greg.
'What was that?' Harry wondered as Greg began to ask the campers for recommendations as to what to sing first. 'Hermione didn't just...no, she couldn't have felt something too, could she have?' Harry droned Greg out and became lost in his own thought. He was so confused. He'd never acted like this around a girl he liked before. When he'd asked Rebecca out, it had been easy. But then again, he'd had nothing to lose. Hermione however, well she meant everything to him. And it's not like this was a new development. He knew he'd liked her for quite some time now. Maybe that's why it had been so easy for him to ask out other girls. He knew that his heart wasn't really it in so there was no way he could get truly hurt. Hermione, however, was dangerous. If she knew the power she held over him, he'd be in a world of danger. He was utterly, hopelessly, in love with her. 'Why is this so difficult?!' Harry sighed out loud to accompany his thoughts. What frustrated him most is he knew what he had to do. If he didn't at least attempt something with Hermione, he'd drive himself insane for the rest of his life. 'Okay, we'll make a deal,' Harry spoke to himself. He wasn't going to go insane over this. 'Tomorrow...this week, I can't do this...FINE! Before we leave camp, I will tell Hermione how I feel.' At his own admission, Harry felt a wave of relief wash over him. Now all that was left to do, was work up the nerve to actually say something to Hermione.
"Like that'll ever happen," Harry scoffed at himself.
"What was that?" Hermione broke from her song, uponing Harry speak next to her after being silent for a few minutes.
Harry froze. He wondered how much he'd said out loud. "Did I say something?" His eyes were still big. 'Please don't let her have heard me,' he silently begged whoever was listening.
"You said, 'like that'll ever happen'....Like what?" she inquired. Her voice was soft, but he knew it so well, he could easily pick it out from the overbearing singing voices around them.
"Oh, nothing," he offered a small smile as another wave of relief washed over him. This time, it was in relief of Hermione not having realized he'd been debating his feelings for her the past few minutes. She smiled and turned back to singing again. It wasn't going to be easy for him, but Harry was finding new determination in himself. She inspired him, just by being in his presence. 'Eventually...' he smiled as he watched her sing.
~*~
end of chapter nine
So as per usual, your reviews are not mandatory, but as any author can tell you, they mean soooo much to a writer! Sooo, if you feel inclined, please take just a minute to review! Whether you sign in or not, I still love ya!
As promised, next chapter has what you've been waiting for a lots of fun to ensue!